Hounded by Love

One of my ex girlfriends, Kate, was a big animal lover. She was always sponsoring some rare monkey in Africa or baking cakes to raise funds to save the gay whale or such like. People often remarked how fortunate I was to have someone so caring. I would tell them if she spent less time playing Dr Doolittle then maybe I would not have to sleep in the spare room so often. I remember this used to get me some puzzled looks and for an instant I could not understand why but then I worked out they thought I was being mean so I used to tell them the bed was always full of her dogs so there was no room for me. They would smile and nod. Too easy.

Anyway, she got involved in volunteering at an animal shelter which did not impress me and to add insult to injury she expected me to walk and feed her dog whilst she was out being St Francis of Assissi. I kid you not. So on the two evenings when she was helping out I would invite her sister Amanda over. She would feed the dog and I would pretend I had taken it for a walk. (So long as I let it out in the garden and did its business (which I would fling over into next door – I guess that’s why we have new neighbours) Kate thought the hound had been walked. Thus I was able to lure in Amanda. She was low hanging fruit. Ignored by her boyfriend it only took a couple of weeks of texts and declarations of compatibility and I was bedding her each time she came round. Kate would come home and spend most of her time petting her dog but I had someone else to distract me so I let that flagrant failure to give me attention slide a little. Not totally as I still used it to remind her of how neglectful she was of me. I did notice though that she was spending more time and more money on the hound and was obviously doing it to provoke me. Her sister Amanda then started to change. She was initially great fun, vibrant, passionate and interesting but then she got whiny and needy and had the audacity to start criticise my girlfriend Kate. That was not on. She would still call round twice a week, even when I stopped inviting her and I had grown tired of bedding her. I had decided that Kate was the better choice of the two and wanted to focus my attentions on her but she doted on that wretched dog.

Demonstrating the decisive decision making that is my hallmark I took prompt action. On an evening when Amanda had called over I agreed to sleep with her. Before doing so I let pooch out into the garden and opened the gate. I went through the motions with Amanda and then had just returned downstairs when Kate returned. A few moments passed and then she began to call for the dog and with increasing urgency. The hound had gone. I blamed Amanda. Cue sibling fall out. The upshot of it was Kate never spoke to her sister again. Amanda never called round and pestered me and the dog was gone.

Two birds and all that.

8 thoughts on “Hounded by Love

  1. Witch says:

    This is so sad and honestly, it’s pathetic to be that jealous over a dog.
    But this is also enough warning as to why I should stay away from narcs. If my cold blooded animals were released into English weather I would stab someone

  2. Violetta says:

    Hey, maybe Chelsea and Liverpool are karma for that.

  3. Summer says:

    Its so terrible & so terribly funny!

  4. Just treacherous HG 🙁 I don’t get that the consequential risk was gambled with. Appreciate you speaking it how I have learned to see how you explained it but the consequences of such actions used have the most devastating and lasting impact on those of us who have lost pets and felt the agony of a beloved german shepherd for example die that harmed no one and was loved by any that met her.

    What if when you let the dog out, a car hurtled along with infants in car seats let’s say twin baby boys just six weeks of age and the driver in trying to avoid the wandering dog crashed the car into a large tree and all were killed?

    Please confirm how can we rationalise the risk that could involve deaths of innocent lives?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Then that would be an accident which I would not accept any blame for since the dog running into the road and the driver’s error in not controlling the vehicle properly are intervening events and our kind can never accept blame. Of course, being aware a suitable statement of how it was a tragedy in order to appear decent etc to the façade would follow. It is noteworthy that the consequential risk you describe would not have been evaluated.

      1. Let us reverse it then HG- Do you think that the narcissist would expend energy for hours to days to weeks to whenever it was useful to blame the empath? You bet ya! If he had dwarfism he would blame the council for building the footpath too close to his rear end! Seriously HG anyone can duck and weave and do all in their power to avoid responsibility an if it is uncomfortable, that is part of being an adult surely? I don’t think any child likes being scolded or blamed and adults certainly feel uncomfortable too. Yes, we are taught that big people take responsibility and consequences that arise from our decisions.

        Many inspirational artists/storytellers have been inspired by Muddy Waters’ and this song from Rag n Bone Man appears to sum up what you are saying, however the lyrics point toward him saying we make mistakes but don’t put the blame on me (himself). Do you agree that you make mistakes and if so what occurs in the mindset that builds the rock wall if blamed for those mistakes? Are you saying that it is too prickly or uncomfortable to feel blame? Does it trigger some emotion or physiological response that is so unbearable and if just if that is the case, then why should your kind have immunity from those feelings when your kind would certainly blame another for your mistakes and give little thought for how it makes them feel.

        Are you saying that you must avoid it at any cost and if we were as sensitive to it as your kind then we should shoulder it because we are stronger or more resilient to cope with it in an adult way, albeit that it hurts just as much as what it does your kind because it must and that is where full blown rage in your kind often appears through that trigger.

        HG during recovery a patient may awaken slowly after a GA and be fine, groggy etc. Not uncommon is the patient that comes out of the GA teary and emotional at times inconsolable. Due to the drugs used and the gases a patient may have been very distressed and remember nothing whilst others more rarely have a full grounding of exactly what they have been through and although never indicated they were not in deep sleep during theatre, may recall vividly details that leave no doubt.
        Narcissists, sociopaths and psychopaths are not immune from the outpouring in recovery and the tears streaming down their face. Their HX may indicate that they have no empathy, no remorse and live a life where this outpouring has not been witnessed by family or familiar primary sources, but for their childhood tantrums where frustration, rage and red-faced extremes were observed.

        From that I gain that everything is a conscious effort on the part of your kind to thwart the feeling of for example, the blame or accountability of an issue, event. Do you not get mentally fatigued keeping up the fascade and I that why you derive so much fuel? This fuel concept- is it the energy one feels such as when hearing a piece of music that can get the up and dancing yet before that they were clearly exhausted but the music seems to make the fatigue invisible or not felt at all as they dance away with what appears to be full energy?

        https://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/entertainment/a/33084709/ragnbone-man-reveals-his-human-side/

  5. Veronica says:

    Oh my God.

  6. seanstoirm says:

    Oh this is too much! I abhorr your actions (and their motive) but very much welcome your honesty in letting us in on these secrets. I’m even laughing because you wrote it so casually and amusingly. It’s an ethical paradox and I just do not know how to handle it!

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