Nothing to Fear

I am fearless. I am a pioneer who marches into new lands where I stake my claim because it is my right. I am blessed with my formidable powers that enable me to strike down my enemies, vanquish my foes and take that which rightfully belongs to me. Driven by my raging fury I will consign those that stand against me to oblivion. No wall can keep me out, no fortress will prevent my ever onwards march. It takes a special person to have no fear. Few are imbued with this for only a few can stand astride the world and survey it knowing it belongs to them. To be free of doubt, devoid of concern and unburdened by conscience enables me to move forward without fear. This is entirely necessary. Fear paralyses. Fear inhibits and stunts. Achievements cannot be secured when one lives with fear. New horizons cannot be reached with fear lurking on your shoulder. Fear will set you back and keep you back. I cannot be restrained. I must not be harnessed or withheld for I must always strike out. It is by lacking this fear which infects so many of you, that I am able to bring my greatness to bear on those around me. To live without fear is true freedom. As Evey declared in V for Vendetta

“I wish I wasn’t afraid, all of the time.”

Fear prevents potential being reached. Fear dissuades and controls. Fear is the enemy of progress, it is the opponent of invention and it is the foe that will quash your dreams as if they never existed. I am blessed with the capacity for knowing that what I will do will succeed and thus I am freed from fear. My plans in the workplace will be met with acclaim and admiration so that I am not held back in formulating and presenting them. When I enter the room, heads turn in acknowledgement of my ability. Not for me the skulking walk of the frightened who must keep to the shadows for fear of failure. When I approach somebody I know they will like me, want me and admire me. This enables me to succeed in all my interactions with people, from the barmaid to the chairman of the board. All of this is because I am free from fear.

You know fear all too well. You tell me of the stifling effect it has on you. The tremble it injects into your voice. The clamminess of your hands as you reach out to shake someone’s hand. The churning stomach and the light-headedness. The dread that washes over you as the alarm goes off and another day lies ahead of you seeking to challenge you and grind you down. You live surrounded by fear because you allow it to control you. You allow yourself to be governed by your feelings. You have not mastered them. You have not cast aside those that you do not need and instead you choose to be a slave to those feelings so that amidst them fear comes and takes you with its cold hand about your neck and pulls you downwards into a quagmire of uncertainty, worry and fear. You fear how you will be regarded when you attend a drinks party with new people. You worry about how your dress or shirt will look. You worry about money, family, health,friends, the environment, taxes and your sports team. You have allowed fear to permeate every level of your life and in turn it has weakened you and held you back. Look to me. Do I show fear or concern as I go about my works? No I do not. How many times have you looked upon my kind and remarked how we always succeed, how nothing bothers us and how we always triumph no matter what happens? That is what comes with being fearless. That is what being a leader, a pioneer and a titan is all about. I am without fear and thus I make the world mine.

This lack of fear is what draws people to me. They are mesmerised at the nobility that I possess. They look on in awe at how I tackle every obstacle with that unerring fortitude,driven on by my unswerving belief in that what I do is right. I am not bound my convention. I am not hampered by rules, regulations or procedures. Those are devices for the frightened. Artifical creations put in place to give those who are less than me, less than us, something to hold onto. You cling to these laws whilst I strike them down. Like a crusading knight I ride into battle and fear no defeat for victory will always be mine.

I fear nothing.

It is nothing that I fear. But I will not admit that.

43 thoughts on “Nothing to Fear

  1. Liked the way you described. Keep the good work going.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

  2. Oh goodness HG now I’m thinking I wish I hadn’t posted that comment – I certainly don’t want to give you any more ammunition !

    Yer I probably got it wrong – just me who thinks like that !!

  3. Interesting article HG. It made me think, perhaps this is why we feel safe with Ns ? Because they are fearless.

    Like a child should feel safe in the presence of their parent, beleivanle their parents can resolve and protect them from anything.

    I never experienced ‘feeling safe’ as a child, as I’m sure is similar for most of us who have suffered trauma at the hands of our parents.

    Something I yearned to feel. And I’m sure this is another factor or many which attracts us to those who can make us feel this way.

    But understanding this through your articles continues to help make sense of it all.

    1. malignnarc says:

      That is an interesting interpretation Alexis and not something that had immediately occurred to me. Thank you.

    2. mlaclarece says:

      See, I am the opposite. My parents made me feel very safe and sheltered. Although I seem to be attracted to Narcs, I always seem to be the one to absorb making the foundation of our existestence “safe”. I’ve been described as the “glue that holds the family together”. I would love to know what that feels like as an adult for another adult to make me really feel safe.

      1. nikitalondon says:

        Me too . My parents always made me feel very safe. The unsafest moment I had in my life was that April my dad passed away. For us 3…
        And now what? Learn to live without dad… ?? . The one that made it first to stop the mourn was my youngest brother.

        Narcissist give the impression of being very strong , sure and capable and therefor attract all kinds of women except those who are very strong and capable and super independent. That on one side and on the other side the full-void soul magnetism.

      2. That’s interesting Clarece, do you have any idea what it is then that has attracted you to these types ?

        1. mlaclarece says:

          Absolutely! They are typically very charismatic, extroverted, entertaining… I was painfully shy in school. Not many friends. I would say high school was something I endured and dealt with bullying and being made fun of. Nothing real extreme but enough to keep me withdrawn and introverted. I wiped the slate clean in college and came out of my shell then. Made good friends. But I married my first boyfriend who I was intimate with and showed me attention. Had a good run for 16 years. I’m slowly coming to the realization my ex-husband has some Narc qualities, more pronounced now as we grew up and evolved into middle age. I believe he prepped and primed me for the Narc I encountered post divorce. On the occasional date here and there with probably “normal” guys, they have bored me. It feels more like a job interview and I have to carry the conversation. I’m exhausted when it’s over. Lol. Initially the Narcs (and maybe I’ve dealt with higher elite ones) are witty and fun and manage to keep me mentally stimulated. That’s as good of a guess as I can give at the moment.

          1. School is a tough place that’s for sure !! I’m sorry you had to go through that Clarece. The Ns are fun and definitely have their place. I only had the one thank goodness and it was short lived. Well only one who had any affect on me.

            Female friends however, wow, I’ve always been sucked in by them !! I think likely because I grew up in an all female environment with no males in my life whatsoever. But now I keep them as friends to hang out with, just for the good times then they can go back to where they came from and stay there unless I want to go out and play again hahaha.

  4. nikitalondon says:

    HG
    YOu dont have to fear the nothing because there will always be someone to count on.
    Close your eyes every night knowing there is somebody who cares and is there is somebody there. Maybe not right besides you but there for you. 😘😘😘❤️.
    Enjoy your day ☀️☀️🌔

  5. observant says:

    Truth. Even without lawbreaking, confidence, decisiveness, fearlessness = power = magnetism

  6. I actually find malignnarc to be quite flexible, yielding and rather than being delusional, quite an observer of reality. I’d expect no less from this lover of visual sensuality. M, I agree with you that your skills might go unappreciated by many, but from what I’ve seen here and especially elsewhere, I think your portfolio might very well eventually hang in a gallery somewhere, even the Met. Bravo!

    1. I was speaking from an ontological perspective.

      1. nikitalondon says:

        So you mean the creature has taken over his being and existance?

        1. The creature is driving the sense of self, or lack there of. The creature is the war that is leading his navigation through the world. The creature is inflicting abuse upon all that enters his path.

          1. nikitalondon says:

            Hello Flower & the Rock

            Thanks for the clarification. I get it now.
            Hopefully not abuse to all that cross his life…😮

          2. Hello Nikita
            When one is harming themselves, they are then harming others.

          3. nikitalondon says:

            Yes this is very true. This is why forgiveness is very important.

          4. mlaclarece says:

            I agree that the creature drives his actions, but I always thought he avoids it because it is like the only form of a conscience and would force the day if reckoning on all his machinations? I always thought his cognitive self is at “war” with the creature to keep it contained under the construct. I guess I viewed the creature as a source to provide redemption if integrated. If I’m understanding correctly, you’re saying the creature is the source of the evil in his core. Whoa! Where can redemption come thru then, if ever?

  7. Hope says:

    HG, Would it be possible to please expand upon this comment in a future post. “It is nothing that I fear. But I will not admit that.” We empaths simply do not understand about the frightful beast that lurks within your kind. The dilemma of the loss of supply throwing you into the darkness of the abyss. You seem so self-confident, brilliant, capable and strong. That cannot tide you through a temporary lack of supply? You are brimming with inner strength, but yet the supply must always be from others? Even others you deem inferior?

    1. malignnarc says:

      Hello Hope, there will be more about the terror of nothingness, the effect of the creature and the beckoning abyss in future posts. Much as I hate to admit these things, I am providing them to provide the full picture and I am doing so at the behest of the good doctors. There will be a full book dedicated to this at a future point as well. Writing it is difficult.

      1. Observant says:

        I keep coming back to the wondering about how much of this behavior is planned (on behalf of other Ns), versus your perception of your own way of thinking projected onto those other Ns. Do you think they feel that there is a beast inside, that nothingness will result (or loss of self-identity) if somebody needles a N enough?

        I do not really believe that there is “exposure”. Nobody can “expose” a mental condition: a doctor can diagnose it, look to the DSMIV tests or whatever. But if you are a person in the general public who says “this person is a sociopath” or even something as small as “that person is obviously trying to gaslight me”, chances are the audience to whom you convey this information will not know what gaslighting is, will see the person sharing the information as some sort of biased extremist who is lashing out at a former (fill-in-the-blank with the relationship) for hurting their feelings. The person announcing these things looks a bit mad, and is self-discrediting themselves by doing so.

        I have seen the reactions of people who (I think) have NPD or are sociopaths. They are consistent across the board with response to criticism, projecting, lashing out disproportionately to the person who will dare to cross them, etc. I do not know that any are self-aware, but the need for an audience and the bandwagon effect they crave at their suggestions is consistent. Some are natural leaders, others are charming socially but unable to communicate well enough to lead the crowd without frustration (as in a workplace setting), and this implied threat of looking badly (at work) drives them crazy. Of course, they will always blame the underlings for failing to “get it”, when everyone scrambles to please but the “leader” cannot communicate and becomes condescending, etc.

        I am not sure what I am asking. I just keep thinking that the brain works differently on everyone, and even if they are self-aware, they may not be thinking about a beast or nothingness. What do you think, HG?

        1. malignnarc says:

          Some will not recognise it in the way that I have described, in the way that someone will become angry but they are not able to articulate why they feel angry,they just do. Others fear that loss of the identity, who we regard ourselves really as and that which we show the world and being left with what feels like nothing.

  8. Lil one says:

    You fear the creature coming out and taking over hg

    1. The creature has taken over

      1. nikitalondon says:

        Why are you saying this? 😮

  9. mlaclarece says:

    If you only fear nothing, then don’t ya think it’s time you made friends with the Creature?

  10. A healthy acknowledgement of fear teaches us that which we are not, which is the very reason why narcissism deceives its own self loathing and becomes rigidified in the illusion of omnipotence.

    1. malignnarc says:

      Rigid.

    2. nikitalondon says:

      Again… I ❤️ How you write.
      Have a good day 🌷

  11. j says:

    Not always true. My narcissist had many mental problems. I thought it was funny how demonic movies scared him. To the point he tried crawling the walls to get away from MOMMA. He has night terrors, and I find peace in knowing. That these scare the shit out of him. I told him those are his demons playing with him. So true. I hope they eat him alive.

    1. Sidney says:

      My N had night terrors. I’ve never seen anything posted on this…. As evil and cruel as he could be, when he finally did sleep, he would cry out terrified and shaking and disoriented, writhing in the grip of his nightmares. It was at first frightening to watch and I would gently wake and reassure him. After many D&D, I would allow him to suffer, tormented an extra couple minutes… Waking him only when I feared he would wake the children. Are night terrors common for N’s? Only lesser N’s have them? I’m very much intrigued as I have missed any info of this subject regarding N’s. Everything else has been covered… Well.

      1. malignnarc says:

        I have never had them, I sleep soundly. I haven’t come across this with the Ns that I know.

        1. nikitalondon says:

          Never seen that neither. Ever. They sleep like rocks even when you are silently crying besides.

      2. observant says:

        One of our kids had them from about age one until ten or so. He could not be awakened, but he appeared to be awake. He would be hysterical, screaming, looking right at us as if we were monsters. No amount of holding him or speaking to him got through tbe dream state. These episodes lasted about 20 minutes or so.

        I met another mom whose child had these. She said a cold damp cloth on the forehead would awaken him, and it worked. I have heard that this phenomenon is common with children who have been under anaesthesia for a surgery at a young age. Our son was 12 months when he had a major surgery, so maybe this is true. He also has very strong N tendencies, but I am not sure if there is a correlation.

        1. nikitalondon says:

          Obervant
          Sosorry to hear about your kids. What about if you sing and read nice love stories before bed? Or some nom traditional medicine like those doctors that read the eyes ( sorry dont know the technical name). Mi have heard many many good things on thise doctors and other specialities

        2. nikitalondon says:

          Sorry I hit send accidentally.
          How I said, I am pretty sure nom traditional medicine can help you alot with these ” panick attacks” i know because my ex-mother in law is that type of doctor and I heard some success stories from her in the past helping people with ” panick attacks” . I dont know if what your children had or what was described above is that but it certainly sounds like.
          Good luck with your child and hope you give it a try because those non traditional medicines do work for this type of problems with the sleep. I hear it alot from work colleagues etc. 🌷🌷.

        3. nikitalondon says:

          Hi Observant

          I just now now remember a conversation with my ex mom in law when I gave birth, that traumatic events during birth and early childhood do give place to anxiety and panic attacks. Like long births, or the use of this sucking machine, or forceps for birth etc, all this cam give place to panick in adulthood. I believe a surgery at such a small age could have been also traumatic and causing panick to your kid.
          As said with lots of love and understanding when the episode comes and those non traditional medicines like iriologist ( i remembered) or kinesiologist, or creaneosacral therapy or osteopathy I think you can improve significantly the problem.
          I heard people who have had panick attacks ( like I said I dont know if screaming in the middle of the night is a panic attack) and had major if not total solution to the their problem with one or combininig these therapies.

          Time to work now. Good luck 🌷🌷🌷

      3. knowledgeispower says:

        Yes the N I was with had night terrors – he would shout out horrible scathing insults (to himself I assumed?). He also had panic attacks at work. He is neurotic. Can’t sleep without putting his clothes back on. Interesting to hear that other N’s are neurotic too – their subconscious is somehow breaking through – perhaps a ghost of their childhood self? Their terrifying parents? No matter, it makes no difference – it just makes them seek more fuel to recover and stop them from going completely mad. As Sam Vaknin says, Narcissism is a defence against psychosis and they unconsciously live in fear of going nuts.

    2. nikitalondon says:

      And its not demonic to wish such bad things to another person?
      What is your definition of demonic?

  12. jingercin says:

    I guess I’m not a very good worrier. I prefer not think about things instead of worrying over something that can’t be changed. I rarely care what anyone thinks of me…except my children.
    As far as rules however, they are not for comfort…they are a challenge. A way to get something done without cheating or taking the easy way out. There are some rules that are made to be broken though…

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