In the Picture

thV6PJJ06DI love the first picture that I ever saw of you. It was not one taken by me although there will be hundreds of those in due course. A multiplicity of snapshots which have been taken to show the world how wonderful you and me are together. Each one carefully configured on my part to send a message. See who I am now taking to your favourite restaurant? Look how we went to Rome when you always wanted to go? How about that? I have gone to the theatre when I told you I hated watching plays. See how we get on with my family? Go on, look at how happy she is making me, far more than you ever did. No, those pictures, whilst valuable to me and my machinations do not come close to how I marvel over that first picture of you.

Was it instead a picture you sent me? One of the hundreds I asked for, begged for and demanded? At first I wanted them to show to you how you were always in my mind ( thus ensuring I became a fixture in your mind). I also wanted those racier photographs that I persuaded you to take for me. Initially I used them for titillation although the real motive was to store them away and use them as a method of forceful coercion further down the line. You know me, always thinking of the next move. Later I requested you send me photos under the guise of wanting to look on your beauty when the reality was that I wanted to ensure you were where you said you were (you never really noticed how I asked for you to stand under the sign of the bars you went in or the name of the store you were shopping in or next to the friends you had told me you had gone to visit)

No, the first picture of you, the one I love the most is the one I first came upon when I searched for you online. It might have been your profile picture from an internet dating sight, your twitter banner picture or one you posted on Facebook. It could have been in the local press or a still from a youtube video. Either way, it was not one I had taken and it was not one that I had requested you take for me. I love that picture as I look on your engaging smile, the radiance emanating from it like solar flares from the sun, illuminating and bringing warmth all around you. Your skin is flawless and healthy, blooming with effervescence. Those long tresses of hair swinging to one side, or the bounce of your bob, or the neat rigidity of that fringe, all conveying that message of freedom and having been chosen by you. Your eyes shine, happiness exploding from them, the colour vibrant and elation searing from your gaze. I look on that picture that is burgeoning with potential, laden with possibility and exuding hope. You are a beacon of purity, decency and affection. Your caring nature cascades from that picture. You are that virgin empath, unsullied by my toxicity and untouched by my polluting influence.

Whenever I look on that first picture of you as the surge begins inside me and soars fast and fierce. I must have you. I remember again why I had to have you.

I see fresh prey.

14 thoughts on “In the Picture

  1. Yo says:

    It means that u r strong?.. although u need a recognition from appliences?..
    Yes. It s definitly a strong person, who feels as if he were nobody in case miserable appliences would not reconfirm that he exists…

    Pity pity case. Now i see it s a real mental illness.

  2. Yo says:

    What about God? Today is the 1st day of Ramadan and it made me think… u know what u r doing. And it s against any God in any religion.

    How u manage to escape ur accountability in front of him? Thanks

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I am doing his work.

      1. Yo says:

        What do u mean

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Ensuring the weak are weeded out.

  3. nikitalondon says:

    Hmmm so many pictures yes… Hundreds of them
    I dont think about it anymore… Whatever.
    Unpleasant memories, Was good to read again HG . As its so good to read you 😍

  4. mlaclarece says:

    Hmmm…when you say you “must have” this beacon of purity, decency and affection that is fresh prey, is that a need or a want? Just curious.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Need. Or want. Depends who I am saying it to.

      1. mlaclarece says:

        You need the fuel to exist. You want to collect appliances. I suppose depending on the person, you echo whichever answer you think they want to hear to secure the seduction.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Correct.

  5. Cody says:

    How lucky for you when the latest prey is a fb/ig addict who is more than happy to take loads of pictures of us together and post publicly for the world (meaning your ex) to see, so that later on when you discard her, you can blame her for being the one obsessed with social media postings – one of the few times you will actually be telling the truth – and how it wasn’t your idea to show off so publicly like that. Oh no. So beneath you.

  6. Cara says:

    Maybe I should show you some family photos…I look just like Daddy, but I turned out to be as narcissistic as Mommy.

  7. *pretty

  8. Pretty sure you used some of those same words about my picture Lol! Good job I’m not a target! I can see how we fall for it though, I’m currently writing a song called “those prett words”

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