Are You A Candidate for Addiction?
I mentioned in an earlier post the highly addictive quality of sex with our kind. There are numerous factors which affect this addictiveness. The status of our victims also plays a part in creating this addiction. We like to find people who are susceptible to addictive behaviour and in especially in the context of love and relationships. Our aim is to have all our targets become addicted to this lovesex and through the powerful campaign of love bombing, using sex as a weapon and all the other manipulative techniques we apply, this will happen. There are however certain types of victim who are far more susceptible to becoming addicted to this lovesex and this makes matters easier for us. There are, in essence, three categories of victim who are prone to being addicted more easily than a ‘standard’ victim.
The Crush Victim
If during our early conversations and exchanges we ascertain that you referred to having crushes on boys (but you did not have boyfriends) and on for example pop and film stars then this will flag with us that you will be more susceptible to becoming addicted to our lovesex. This adoration and idealisation of people who are unobtainable signifies to us that given access to somebody special, namely us, will result in you feeling special and that childhood crush you had on Tony Hadley from Spandau Ballet is transferred to us. I have written on several occasions about how returning you to childhood is a powerful method of control. This is in this vein. We recognise how you felt about that film star and how you experienced a dizzying euphoria every time you thought about them saw them on the screen or looked at their picture on that poster over your bed. You dreamt up fantasies about you and that person and this became etched on your psyche. Someone who would watch a boy at school from afar, write love letters to that boy but never send them and who would again dream about a life together is someone who regularly experienced crushes. You generated an intoxicating euphoria, albeit manufactured on a fallacy, about this particular person. Imagine how powerful the effect will be when you actually are able to be with someone brilliant, kind, wonderful and attentive? This will shunt you straight into the realms of addiction. You never achieved the outcome you desired of being on the arm of that special person. We will now give you that and by knowing you once had crushes on people we know that you are particularly susceptible to becoming addicted to our lovesex and naturally we will use this to our advantage.
The Fix Addict
The desire to fix and heal is the hallmark of the empath and is one of the reasons when we commence our devaluation of you that you cling to us. You want to fix us. You want to mend the relationship so that it returns to the golden period once again. You had it once so why can it not be attained a second time? Your innate need to help, fix and heal is a laudable trait in you. It is something we want from our victims in order to ensure they keep hanging on as we extract the negative fuel from you. It also tells us that you are somebody who will be susceptible to addiction to our lovesex. The reason for this is that you will think that just another conversation will make things all right again. Just another evening together doing something pleasant. Just another passionate night in bed together. Just one more. Like the alcoholic or drug addict you keep telling yourself that just one more drink or one more line of cocaine and everything will be alright. You convince yourself, despite all evidence to the contrary, that another ‘hit’ with me will fix things. You sense that a corner is just about to be turned, that redemption is but a conversation away and this is why you keep hanging on in there. Somebody who thinks like this because they want to make everything all right and will keep going in the hope this will happen even though everything else points against this, is someone who will readily become addicted to our lovesex. These people have a predisposition to addiction because they can never give up something. Our lovesex has the same effect.
The Broken Addict
I have mentioned in other works how we do like to find people who are damaged. It may be the case that they have been tenderised by one of our kind previously which makes them easier prey for us. It may be that they are so desperate to expunge the horrific experience of their previous relationship they miss all the red flags and warning klaxons. In terms of their susceptibility to addiction, the Broken Addict ranks highly. You have experienced considerable pain from a failed relationship before we came along. It does not necessarily have to have been at the hands of one of kind. It may be an intimate relationship, a familial one or a working relationship. What matters is that you are in pain. Just like the person who drinks too much, takes recreational drugs too often, over-eats or gambles all of these actions, when performed too often become addictions. All of these actions are carried out by these people in order to do one thing; blot out the pain. The usual addictions are used as crutch to help people deal with the pain they are suffering. They are trying to fill a hole. They choose those subjects who provide a quick fix and make everything seem alright for a short time before the crashing low begins and they must return to their chosen fix time and time again and of course in greater and greater quantities. Their chosen fix will be damaging them but their sense of reason has been pushed off balance. Their health, work, finances and relationships all suffer because of this reliance on a particular fix. This is the terrible outcome for those who are in pain and become addicted in order to try and fix that pain.
To learn more about why sex with our kind is addictive and a whole host of fascinating other insights concerning the sexual behaviour of narcissists, read Sex and the Narcissist available as per the links below.
UK http://www.amazon.co.uk/Sex-Narcissist-H-G-Tudor-ebook/dp/B01B8NKS4A
US http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01B8NKS4A
CAN http://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B01B8NKS4A
AUS http://www.amazon.com.au/gp/product/B01B8NKS4A
This is classified as adult material and search filters may need adjustment.
21 thoughts on “Are You A Candidate for Addiction?”
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Porn erotic books or Gray are well below Your book…one might say You could cum while reading some parts of Your book 😉
Praise indeed!
Wow for the first tube in my life I hate to be right dies silent treatment include inbreed firming if addicting behavior? The famous cold shoulder when the drama you create doesn’t seem to cease because you keep repeating it as a continuous punishment in firm if loop like a movie that repeats itself over abs iver in a constant loop? Oh god I really hope to get the most I sinuses answer or he will pay I swear one way or another ill get him that bastard he will no left my very bail sharpened hands fabricated by nature . Love being clawed. Don’t try to declaw me I get very defensive on this subject and won’t respond to hurt pride ok?
Aloha HG, so it’s called lovesex?
That’s the one.
In my earliest days of instigating No Contact, I visualized him with a syringe and needle coming out of his head every time my thoughts would go to him. It did help me begin to overcome the cognitive dissonance that made staying true to myself a huge challenge in early ️Healing.
Addiction in all form – I’m told- is rooted in early trauma. Filling the hole one perceives in their soul with people, places and things that serve to numb that raw, pulsating and nagging sensation that comes in the form of emptiness, lonliness, terror, sadness, and extreme longing. I know at my earliest and most vulnerable development that there were no eyes that looked into mine that mirrored unconditional love and appreciation for my inherent value as a human being. I have sought those eyes in my romantic partners but been blind to the truth of what stared back at me.
It is very difficult to allow myself to be seen but I overallow certain parts. The parts that are painful I pour into the sea like bloody chum for the Sharks to circle. It is my strength and power I hide away. I do wonder why.
Yes, being Broken made me a Sitting Target.
With the false spin of positivity I can take Broken and Turn it into “Beautifully Broken” and “Perfectly Imperfect” and for about two minutes lie to myself that I really embrace that.
Or…I can just be awake and accept that I am unfolding every minute as a whole and complete human being with choices. The choice to pick destruction or birth.
“Be not the slave of your own past – plunge into the sublime seas, dive deep, and swim far, so you shall come back with new self-respect, with new power, and with an advanced experience that shall explain and overlook the old.” Ralph Waldo Emerson
I am (well was) a mixture of the broken and fixer.
But now I’ve fixed myself 🙂
No desire to fix anyone else, help them, yes but only if they’re one of my kind.
Still my favourite book HG !! Everyone must buy this book
No desire to keep re traumatising myself either. And no desire to traumatise anyone else. Unless they’re an N. And even then it’s only a tiny little bit.
Thank you Alexis, it is one of my favourites too but actually isn’t amongst the most popular of my works but I think that is in part to the fact that since it is classed as adult it does not always appear on people’s lists, still I appreciate your endorsement.
Yes. I found it very difficult to find on Amazon. But maybe, when we separate we don’t think about the sex aspect of it. The desire and need for love is so strong that although a lot of people comment on the sex ( I never bloody had any – god damn it !) perhaps we are so overcome with our emotions that sex is not what most people are thinking of ? I don’t know ? Just a thought ?
Yes you maybe right and perhaps people are not as salacious as they appear!
Hahhaha now wouldn’t that be funny !! You’re doing it for them, they’re doing it for you and nobody really wants to do it, they just think the other does. Everyone is faking it – nice one HG !
Seeing is believing Alexis.
Now there’s an offer I can’t refuse HG
I think they’ll all likely buy it soon !! It’s most definitely worth it
Thank you
Oh HG we so adore you…he sucked, I just wanted to fix his defective soul.
.Crush victim” could be interpreted quite literally here. lol.
Enlightening as ever HG, I am gaining so much insight into myself from reading your books and your blog. Are you planning to publish your books in print, there are several that I would find useful for reference and being a romantic I love the smell and feel of a book. It’s so true that the sex is addictive although I think in part I’m fascinated by the darkness that I always sense when I meet one of your kind and that has it’s own thrill…bit like watching a scary movie or riding a terrifying roller coaster!
Yes I am working on a number of them being available in print owing to the request for the same. I just need to organise spines and covers for them and it will be done.
Spandau Ballet…oh the memories. I know this much is true.
very interesting HG. I could see myself in no. 2 but not really because I value many more things in life than to become addicted to someone just for good sex… That would make me very poor in spirit..
Have a nice day HG 😘😘