The Narcissistic Truths – No. 233
54 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Truths – No. 233”
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RE: the words on this meme – applying a different perspective – a round tuit – I see ‘reminders’ of HG’s articles when I go to supermarkets. Chickens, turkey, bananas, honey, flour, ah, I smile behind my mask.
So, in some way “hear our tune” = KTN and the ‘dance’ our emotions / thoughts do in order to ‘re-program’ themselves as we progress through our ET and LT ‘pathways’.
It is a nice image.
HG, once again, thank you so much for your work, it is really appreciated 🙂
I thought Willy Bango was hilarious … I have just actually lol’ed (hate normal use of lol, used as a mask)… Anyway my Narc doesn’t like music at all, thinks pointless .. Is that part of being emotionless? … Weird since been with him, I don’t listen to music as much as I did… I was quite a talented piano player as a teenager, Moonlight Sonata being my best piece until I discovered him and Banjo at 15 … Roll on 25+ years … Banjo my downfall again !! (Also have the 80’s Banjo biscuit song in my head now) x x
JAR OF HEARTS
Songwriters: Christina Perri;Drew Lawrence;Barrett Yeretsian
I know I can’t take one more step towards you
Cause all that’s waiting is regret
And don’t you know I’m not your ghost anymore?
You lost the love I loved the most
I learned to live, half-alive
And now you want me one more time
And who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?
I hear you’re asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms
I’ve learned to live, half-alive
Now you want me one more time
Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?
Dear, it took so long
Just to feel alright
Remember how to put back
The light in my eyes
I wish I had missed
The first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you’re back you don’t get to get me back
Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all
And who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ’round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Jar of Hearts is so perfect, I sent that to my narc sometime post escape.
Also,… Let us in on some of the things you’ve done before this discard..
If it’s a discard.. You’re going to fire someone..? And since it’s ‘dark’ … you’re going to fire someone (a good worker) based upon something untruthful..?
I could listen to Canon in D (Johann Pachelbel) all day, if someone would play for me… any takers?
I can play Moonlight Sonata. A very water down version. 1st year student. I am very naughty as I do not practice like I should. In and out for the desire to learn.
My son took private lessons for over Six years, now he doesn’t play and could care less. It did help with getting a degree in electrical engineering I believe.
you think you’re gonna to live your life alone
in darkness
and seclusion
yeah I know
you’ve been out there
tried to mix with those animals
and it just left you full of humiliated confusion
so you stagger back home
and wait for nothing
but the solitary refinement of your room spits you back out onto the street
and now you’re desperate
and in need of human contact
and then
you meet me
and you whole world changes
because everything I say is everything you’ve ever wanted to hear
so you drop all your defenses and you drop all your fears
and you trust me completely
I’m perfect
in every way
cause I make you feel so strong and so powerful inside
you feel so lucky
but your ego obscures reality
and you never bother to wonder why
things are going so well
you want to know why?
cause I’m a liar
yeah I’m a liar
I’ll tear your mind out
I’ll burn your soul
I’ll turn you into me
I’ll turn you into me
cause I’m a liar, a liar
a liar, a liar
I’ll hide behind a smile
and understanding eyes
and I’ll tell you things that you already know
so you can say
I really identify with you, so much
and all the time that you’re needing me
is just the time that I’m bleeding you
don’t you get it yet?
I’ll come to you like an affliction
and I’ll leave you like an addiction
you’ll never forget me
you want to know why?
cause I’m a liar
yeah I’m a liar
I’ll rip your mind out
I’ll burn your soul
I’ll turn you into me
I’ll turn you into me
cause I’m a liar, a liar
liar, liar, liar, liar
I don’t know why I feel the need to lie
and cause you so much pain
maybe it’s something inside
maybe it’s something I can’t explain
cause all I do
is mess you up and lie to you
I’m a liar
oh, I am a liar
if you’ll give me one more chance
I swear that I will never lie to you again
because now I see the destructive power of a lie
they’re stronger than truth
I can’t believe I ever hurt you
I swear
I will never to you lie again, please
just give me one more chance
I will never lie to you again
I swear
that I will never tell a lie
I will never tell a lie
no, no
ha ha ha ha ha hah haa haa haa haaa
sucker
sucker!
oh, sucker
I am a liar
yeah, I am a liar
yeah I like it
I feel good
ohh I am a liar
yeah
I lie
I lie
I lie
oh, I lie
oh I lie
I lie
yeah
ohhh I’m a liar
I lie
yeah
I like it
I feel good
I’ll lie again
and again
I’ll lie again and again
and I’ll keep lying
I promise.
Liar, Henry Rollins, will forever be the song I associate with him
Never broken
Wow!! Hard to believe that’s a real song! Can’t imagine lyrics more appropriate for this site!
I’m going to go in a different direction here. Would you expect any less? I am now “tuned in” to spotting narcissism miles off as I have educated myself by HG Tudor. I will no longer dance to their “tune” as it doesn’t sound like music to my ears. I will literally stick with the music industry as they have such a variety of tunes to enjoy and relate to. The only tune I would actually consider dancing to is that of the moderator. That would be a striptease. (Although stripping to beethoven, hmmm) Yes, my husband knows, yes we each get one celebrity crush. Mines HG. Deal with it. 😍
They also use movies. Mine liked to say we were like 50 shades of grey. It was embarrassing to hear him say that. He related to the power but the sex…no way. Only in his dreams maybe. I felt sorry for him when he made the comparison. Then I realized he hadn’t even seen the movie and was getting all the information about the movie from his new primary source. Then out of the blue he wanted to try tantric sex. That idea came from her too. Maybe smaller movement gave the illusion that he could perform. He certainly had the gaze down. God, I sound so bitter. Whatever stage of healing I’m in…I hate it. It’s very unattractive. Even to myself!
HG, perhaps the next few days don’t have to be as dark. I challenge you to be honest with the situation, if you are discarding someone. Try to do it gently as possible.
Your concerns are noted Free Bird. It is a professional matter, not romantic.
Ok, I am feeling rather stupid. I looked up willy banjo and realized it isn’t a banjo at all. My narc needs his herbal medicine too.
I looked up myself as well Free Bird! Willy Banjo…🙈😂
Interesting music thread, I love baroque music and the harpsichord. I also appreciate the banjo, perhaps a little bluegrass is in order for you HG. I feel sorry for whoever is getting discarded, try not to be too cruel. You might like listening to Rainbow Connection (Kermit the frog on banjo) …or, it might make you puke.
@ava101 It might have something to do with Mr Tudor ‘s Mother not girlfriend.
Talking about music: HG , Do you play any musical instrument?
Piano and the willy banjo.
Curious..I do play piano as well..do you play classical music? In regards your willy banjo playing( as according to google definition) it is definitevly not appealing…
I do play classical music yes. Toccata and fugue in d minor is always impressive. Do you play classical music?
The willy banjo is just for me.
Yes I play classical music as well…Chopin and Mozart my favourites.. I know your banjo playing is just for you…but still it is not appealing…Are you “dark” now or “light”????? Feels like you are a little bit dark today? No offence…
I like Mozart, he was a genius and influenced Beethoven considerably. I am not as keen on Chopin. Which of Mozart’s prolific output do you like the most?
Interesting that you consider me dark, perhaps it arises from what is going to happen over the next few days.
I agree with you..piano sonata 11.. Mov.3 Turkish March…yes I sense you as a little bit dark now…I certainly didn’t need to know about your banjo playing…your answer surprised me…you are always very polite when you answer..What is going to happen over the next days???
It was stated as joke Superxena.
Yes I like Piano Sonata 11 also.
The next few days – things have to get done.
I know it was stated as a joke HG…you have a great sense of humor…although sometimes is hard to understand it…Which is your favourite classical? You mean things have to get done here on your blog ? Private life? Work related?
I am pleased you realised it was a joke Superxena.
I would describe it as a toss-up between Beethoven’s Piano Sonata 14 in C sharp Minor and
Rimsky-Korsakov’s Scheherazade Symphonic Suite Op 35
Professionally.
Beethoven’s piano sonata 14:) delicious taste…Moonlight…I like it as well. Quite a contrast with Rimsky-Korsakov’s symphony…quite intense…powerful… I see…I do not know anything about your job..although I have asked several times..but I hope whatever you have to get done…gets done soon.. Perhaps next time kan you play the piano for me..you can record Moonlight for me? I bet you are not going to post this comment on your blog😉too..compromising…Some of your blogers might get curious😉
It will get done. It always does.
I kind of was suspecting yesterday that your good mood had to do with the devaluation of your poor girlfriend. 🙁 Let her go, for heaven’s sake. Or creature’s sake. Or. …
Noooo! Don’t let her go! I’m not ready for you to discard Kim. 😪😥😢
Mr Tudor, you’re a bit like Beethoven. You provide us with so many emotions through your writing despite not being able to feel them deeply yourself like Beethoven who was still able to compose some masterpiece music despite being completely deaf.
What an excellent analogy.
HG are you in the mafia? Thatd explain everything 😂 seriously you do know how to create mystery lol maybe i better not know 🤔
I am not in a mafia but I do belong to a ‘gang’ if you will.
The “Good ‘Ole Boys Gang”, I speculate? You aren’t Sicilian so no Mafia for you
No evidence he was completely death according to my grade school instructor. However, he was in love with Bach because he was blind, Betthoven, hearing impairment after 30 he would debate with kids that didn’t give a crappie. Lol, Mozart the best composer of all time.(his perception) Geesh, he was so passionate I remember my class mate would say screw Mozart, the instructor would loose it. Killed it for me.
Have not been able to log on to my Spotify since I left. Have to change channels on the radio all the time. My lists are filled with memories but one day I will log on and delete them all. Yes… I hear you HG…. every little thing you write here is the work of true N.
Mine was a classical music lover and the last thing we did together was Beethoven’s Ninth concert. Ode To Joy … what an irony.
No thanks HG. 😂😂
Mine was a mediocre musician, so music was a huge part of our lives. Our song seems to be on the radio all the time right now. Switched to TuneIn BBC Radio 2 to avoid it.
Radio 4 is superior
Simon Mayo and the afternoon Drive Time is compulsory listening at breakfast here, however.
!
For now…… for maybe a little while… this is far too true….
But….. ohhhh for different reasons than u might think. Golden period wishing and reminiscing…..Um… no! Certainly not. It’s a different kind of involuntary obsession/in progress exorcism….only because i can’t believe how much he ruined my life…and i was somehow too stupid not to see…. and the fact i share 4 kids w him…so he is always tormenting me in this way…..
But never ever ever do i ever fantasize w getting back with him ever. No no no no. Nightmare.
But he remains …. in other ways… i wish i could purge him and his effects from my mind and existence…… but it’s not so easy….. he ruined me in so many ways…. crushed me… still trying to pick up the pieces . I will say the interim of learning and healing has been at times quite pleasant anyway…. it has afforded me a bit of travel luxury…. in Miami at present… getting ready for a cruise to bahamas…. and then a jaunt to key west w my friend from belize! Former miss Belize beauty queen! And for this i am grateful…. a respite from the constant misery he is in my life!
HG!
Freddy Krueger.
I am afraid to close my eyes.
I am afraid of staying awake.
I am afraid of stepping out my door.
I am afraid to stay in my home.
You are everywhere yet nowhere.
You are real.
You win.
Sleep sweet karen. Do not let him steal your sleep. No no no. Sleep all day girl
One day it will be gone
Indeed, my ex narc used music a lot to convey messages throughout our relationship. One song was always associated with sex during the love bombing stage, so even now whenever I hear it I can’t help but think of the amazing sex we had. Interesting he chose ‘Creep’ by Radiohead as his daily song of choice to play during devaluation
Hi sweetsoul, that’s no surprise, look at the lyrics.
He shows his struggle in this song and it shows how he feels about himself.
That song says it all. They devaluate because they can’t stand the emptiness inside of them. They push everyone away.
They realize that their victims are to good for them:
Song:
When you were here before
Couldn’t look you in the eye
You’re just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world
And I wish I was special
You’re so fuckin’ special
But I’m a creep, I’m a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don’t belong here.
I don’t care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul
I want you to notice
When I’m not around
You’re so fuckin’ special
I wish I was special
But I’m a creep, I’m a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don’t belong here.
I know Constantia, such an apt choice on his part! I Googled the lyrics post discard and it made sooo much sense, especially after having found HG and really understanding what I’d been involved with.
Ive always loved that song creep by radiohead and everytime its on my lithium station it reminds me of my narc. Its funny it came up in this thread.
Omg it was my narcs favourite song he used to blast it out . I used to wonder if he knew he was a narcissist but now I know he did , the words are say it all .