Lies
You breathe. I lie. Both come to us naturally. To you, an empathic and caring person who is imbued with the traits of decency, honesty and integrity the act of lying is anathema to you. Even the use of a little white lie as it spills from your lips has you feeling uneasy. You conduct yourself in a way that involves avoiding lying and you would rather stay silent than let an untruth escape your mouth. Not only will you not lie,you detest being lied to. The lie shatters trust. Trust is a fundamental ingredient,in your world, to any relationship, whether it is between spouses, colleagues, parent and child or service provider. Without trust nothing would be achieved and the world would be a darker place. Breaching that trust is a terrible act and where your trust has been broken by the issuing of a lie then you react with horror, anger, upset and dismay. I can think of no better device for drawing an emotional reaction from your kind than the issuing of a lie. Those three letters create a small word but one which has all manner of repercussions. From the lies that accompany infidelity which strikes at the core of the relationship, to the lies told by those in power to remain a demagogue and achieve political expediency, the effect of not telling the truth is substantial and enormous. Lying results in damage. Lie to your friends and you lose their respect, lie in a court and you commit perjury, lie about your circumstances and you commit fraud,lie to your children and you begin to warp their world, lie to your other half and you destroy a part of them. A small word which packs a thermonuclear punch. So easy to say, so simple to use and the effects can be devastating. No wonder my kind and me relish its use. Economical and effective, no other tool comes close to the power of telling lies and this is why we use them repeatedly,often and extensively.
The advantage of their use is by telling you a Long Involved Explanation we lead you up the garden path and around the houses causing you to become confused and bewildered. The advantage to us is that the terrible truth of what we do becomes Lost In Explaining what we have done by use of our convoluted and twisted diatribes. We tell untruths from the moment that we seduce you as we detail to you our Lovely Ideas Embellished with falsehood about how we will achieve a promotion in under six months, climb Mount Everest and interior design our new impressive home. The fact is that we are fantasists who exaggerate our achievements and our plans so that the Lucid Ideas Expand beyond reality. The use of lies assists us in evading the finger of blame. You will try and catch us our but there is never a Lapse In Exposition as we weave an ever more complex web in which we wish to ensnare you, leaving us untarnished. You look on in astonishment as Laughing I’m Escaping accountability yet again. No matter what I have done, no matter how heinous the activity I will allow untruths to spill from my lips with consummate ease so that I remain in control, superior and blame-free. Often it will be a short and bare-faced lie, designed to have you speechless with incredulity as I walk away Laughing Inside Energetically at your shocked face. On other occasions, I will engage in the shaggy dog story, going round and round, adding more and more to the tale so that I Lovingly Insinuate Eventually that you are the one to blame and this makes you react all the more. How can we have the audacity to say such things and turn the blame onto you? Look It’s Easy, we have no sense of remorse or guilt for the things that we say. You are burdened with a conscience and a moral compass that causes you to steer a path so you always stick to the road of truth. We have no such compass. We do not have a conscience and this allows us to weave and twist, taking our explanations into the realms of the fantastic. Whether we are boasting and bragging about what we are or seeking to escape culpability we will lie incessantly. You will plead with me to tell the truth. You will promise that there will be no upshot, no comeback and no consequence you just, for once want to hear us speak the truth. You know the truth but you want me to tell you, so you can hear it for once. Like I’m Ever going to do that. Why should I give you something that you want? Why should I cede control to you ? Most of all, why should I give up the opportunity of gathering fuel from you? This is why we lie extensively, even when the truth might actually serve us better (better when judged from your viewpoint of course – not ours) we will gain fuel. Our twisted lies always cause you to react and provide us with fuel. If a situation is Lacking In Emotion we know that all it takes is for us to tell you a lie, the bolder the better, the more brazen and ridiculous it is the greater your reaction will be because you hate lies and you hate being lied to. As you stand before me frustrated and upset, I am Laughing I’m Escaping yet again any responsibility for my actions. I will smother you in untruths, layer lie upon lie, Literally It’s Engulfing you in falsehood so that you no longer even recognise the truth, such is the level of distortion. We lie to everyone. The man in the corner shop about how many goals we scored at football, lies at work to cover our backs and to plunge knives into the backs of others. Lies to a friend about how much we like him just to keep the Little Idiot Entertained. Repeatedly we will lie to you to ensure you remain Locked In Entanglement with us and cannot escape. We use lies to express our false sorrow, our faux remorse and our promises to change just so you will not Leave In Earnest. We show-off with lies in a crowd to bring the spotlight back on to us as we talk over other people because we Like Interrupting Everyone. The lie is a Limitless Invigorating Example of what we really are. A fraudster, a charlatan, a con-man and a pathological liar. We know no other way and we have no desire to embrace any other way. I will always lie, I am Loving It Everyday because it furthers my schemes, underpins my ambitions, avoids accountability and brings me fuel again and again.
I am always telling lies.
And that’s the only truth.
120 thoughts on “Lies”
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Hi HG,
After gaining all this knowledge from you I had an encounter with my ex N. For 5 minutes he exaggerated and told lies-almost word for word to what you wrote above. In the past I knew he was lying, but did not understand as I do today the reasons. So, my question is why did I feel more disgusted and sickened after being educated by you than I did before gaining the knowledge?.
Thank you kind Sir 🙂
Because your emotional thinking still dominates and whilst your logic tells you why this is, your emotional thinking contrasts heavily with your knowledge and overrules it, causing the disgust.
HG why do you think my emotional thinking is still dominate over my logic ? I thought because my logic now knows the truth about my former narc and I allowed myself to speak to him for five minutes that I felt discussed at what I was now hearing from him. I believed this was due to the knowledge I have gained through your works thar I was feeling disgusted at what I was now hearing. I could not wait to get away fast enough because I could not stand the evil the lies and five minutes of confusion that he was trying to create. Afterwords I did not feel any emotional connection I felt happy that I was no longer with him. Somehow I was happy that the encounter with him made me realize how far I have come what do you think HG?
Indeed… but you personally HG… you know more. You know when someone is genuine. You can tell. Even in your perspective You are You afterall.
So I guess it illustrates the malice you speak of?
I know that someone is genuine but that still does not mean that I will trust them.
HG
Would this be due to what you were “taught” as a child from your parental figure in what trust and love are to be seen as? Which seriously sucked IMO!
HG
Ironic that you say empaths are honest and decent etc.
That you admit you and your kind lie incessantly.
Yet that it is You that doesn’t trust anyone.
Just another case of judging others by your own mindset which is common place.
In your case since you know the mindset of the empath it does show that “you” know “we” can be trusted and yet with malice aforethought play your mind games as you admit etc.
I fail to undertstand therefore why you say to us that you dont trust “anyone” when you know full well that there are some people that you could trust. You are choosing not to trust the trustworthy deliberately.
But by the same token, you state you are trustworthy based on your perspective. From our perspective, you are untrustworthy.
Still.. fuel is fuel.
It’ all about the fuel.
Interesting.
Food for thought this trust enigma. I will think about it.
HG, i am sure its highly unlikely because that presents an opportunity to triangulate. Damn the great manipulators.
Hi HG,
if you were to lie to a third person in front of your primary supply, would you expect the primary supply to support that lie?
If the primary source denied the lie in front of the third person, how would you react?
Would denying lies stop you from lying in front of the primary source in the future..?
Would this denial become a reason to devalue or discard the primary source?
It depends on the circumstances. Sometimes I would want them to support, other times I would not care since I would be wanting to gain a reaction from the IPPS.
Again, depends on the circumstances. I may just smile and gain the fuel or go on the attack.
No.
Potentially yes re devalue, unlikely re dis-engagement.
People lie for all sorts of reasons, sometimes out of genuine necessity and sometimes to lessen perceived damage. Narcs lie for ill gotten gains, control and manipulation but people know narcs lies even if they can’t work out the machinations. Lies always catch up on pathological liars in the end.
I dont know if you got my post earlier 🙁
Hi Hg,
Question, or questions.
How long was your longest relationship?
And i read in one of your posts about several girls (dont remember exactly) you saw crying of joy for the first time because of something generous you did to her. Knowing that this X person loves you unconditionally and would never dare to lie to you because she loves you so much …. Did you ever EVER feel “bad” for the constant lies and things you would do (cheating and talking to other women in general)?
People do bad things all the time, and we all deserve some sort of treatment/punishment for it or karma per say. But in this case, being with this X person who was almost perfect and did not deserve the smallest lie from you, did you ever think she did not deserve it? Knowing you would finish the golden period and suddenly discard her knowing it would destroy her into pieces and will forever change her life. Going from “almost perfect person” to forever insecure and incapable of trust, love, believe and have faith in people because all you did. Knowing that YOU caused all of this, did you ever feel bad at any moment of the relationship and STOPPED and “start acting right” for once? thinking this X person does not deserve that? Knowing from day one you would cause nothing but damage in the end.
Thanks and sorry for the many questions
“You know the truth but you want me to tell you, so you can hear it for once. ”
Because we would like to see if you are able to, because that is what we expect of a partner (and of course since we have no idea you are not a “partner” but a slaver, we expect it of your kind as well – hey let’s be fair here HG, your kind expects absolute perfection in submission from us and, let’s face it, you’re never going to get that from any of us either 😉
and let’s face it I’m glad you’re fighting back against matrinarc some but she probably knows there’s thought fuel to be gained for igniting your fury…and now I am curious yet again… what type of narc is she? certainly not a lesser… upper mid-ranger or elite?)
“When a man lies, some part of the world is murdered.”
~ Merlin, to king Arthur in the film, Excalibur
Which was of course what Merlin did by causing Arthur to think that Sir Ector was his father.
I loved the tv show, Merlin. I was so sad when it ended.
True. Do you think he was a narc? In any case, Merlin was a puppet master who wound up cursed by Morgana (in the film). All because he lied to himself about being in love with Morgana and her true intentions. His lie to himself blinded and destroyed him.
Lies can and do cause harm. Climate change deniers, for example, are killing the planet.
Anyway, it’s time for chocolate. Thanks for sharing your dark thoughts. Fascinating.
I thought it was when you lie, your nose gets bigger. Which btw has been scientifically proven.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2242722/The-Pinocchio-effect-If-dont-tell-truth-nose-really-away.html
If it is in the Daily Mail it must be true.
Lol narc loves daily mail and is always showing me stories from there 😄
It’s a joke paper.
Which was one of my favorite films for some years
Thank you for your answer HG I guess I’ll better preper mentally. Although as far as I know I was one of 3 or more appliances and probably secondary so maybe I will avoid hoovering.
Those of you in relationships with married Ns kill me.
If you didn’t know he was married or thought he was separated and have now found yourself in love but, he’s still married, I ask you: in love with what? It’s.all.lies.
So when Matrinarc lies about you, or any other narc relative of yours, HG, how do you deal with it?
At one point I reacted to it and obviously gave her fuel. Now I know she does it all the time and I choose not to react. It is difficult on occasions as it will ignite my fury, but I know ignoring her lies is the most effective way. If a third party reports them to me and wants to know the situation, I briefly put them straight.
Stop being like her. It makes her the winner. You can get fuel without the harmful actions you feel you need to display. I am not saying to feel any emotions, but you know what you do and you know it is wrong. So try to control it and do not be her, the person you dislike the most. Or do you secretly admire the hard, cold shell of a person she is?
Yes, it is amazing how many lies there are when the truth would be just as good. Also amazing how I felt sorry for him in the beginning and thought he was embarrassed of some of the things he covered up for. Then as they became worse and worse, I would go to his place of work and get sympathy because he told people I had cancer or that my Father passed away, I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want him to get fired! What should I have done HG? If I told people the truth would that have stopped him from putting me in this situation or only make him not believe I had his back? I think some of his lies are ones that will never come out, the ones he has benefitted from. Only he will know the whole story. I believe I will never trust someone who lies to me and I find out, the first time. A woman once told me that if a man will lie to you, he will also cheat and steal. I think she is right. Thanks for your blog…
It is done now so there is little point being concerned about you not telling those people the truth. You felt at the time that was the appropriate response. If you had told the truth there is no guarantee at all that you would have been spared your current situation.
Hi . what if we escape cos we realise it’s all lies. Will you leave us alone? hoover with more lies or with the truth ?
Initial Grand Hoover and follow-up hoovers. Lies will be used.
Hi Missy. I escaped because I found out about his lies. Been nine weeks, so far no hoover of any kind. One thing I know is that if there ever is a hoover, there will be no truth for sure.
Thank you for your reply anonymous. Maybe we will be the lucky ones. No Hoover. Question for you sir HG do your kind respect any of appliances at any point? Ones that stays no matter what or the one’s that had escaped?
No we do not.
“I’m going in as Vice President. My frat brother knows the owner.” “Yes I’m going in at six figures.”
“I win a home I’m renting out.” Ha!
Shut your lying ass up and GET NAKED!
Narc was a horrible liar and I didn’t care one bit. It was a sexual relationship and I didn’t expect much outside of that — and certainly not the truth! Yes I developed feelings because I FEEL. Something a lying zombie vampire cannot do.
Mistynolan01
Well, there are 6 billion people on this planet and you could not find someone else you had hot sex with? I do see you are a very young beautiful women. Use it. No penis is that important. trust me. Plenty of them out there. IMHO
For me if it was about sex, it was usually only a one time thing. So there was not enough time to tell lies.
If a person was a liar or the stories were to big, it would dry me up, turn me off. I could not handle someone who has tall tales. Perhaps this is why I did not do it myself. I believe I am more cunning and have no need to lie.
But I have been told I am not a target for Narcs. If they mistake me for a target, they let me go pretty quick.
Reminds me of my mother saying to me “don’t worry they would cut you loose very quickly” She would say this in reference of me being afraid of the dark and someone grabbing me.
Ah Oh
My mother used to say the same to me!! They’d turn me loose as soon as they got me in the light! Lol!
Brilliant. Scary but , the truth always is.. thank you HG for showing us the truth, even if you cannot tell It.
You are welcome.
Your blogs are so beautifully blunt, they cut to the core like a dagger. But the way you constantly spelled-out the word LIE (e.g. Lovely Ideas Embellished) throughout the article was like a piece of art, I loved it! It really drove home the constant lying of narcs as well as in a way that seemed so effortless–like you said it’s like breathing, it’s just the way narcs talk. Weaved-in, constant and hidden. Well done H. G.
Thank you Eric, I am pleased you enjoyed the article and yes, being beautifully blunt is to ensure that people’s learning is effective.
The little idiot know that you are lying and will watch you self destruct. 😊
Yes HG, another great piece! Thank you.
We have all been buried alive by the lies. I have however learned that Dick is aware of his lies at least some that ARE having an affect on his reputation. He asked me “does she know I said she had cancer?” The sleaze bag is clearly aware of his LIES.
I wonder could you or have you written on gaslighting versus lying?
Do you smoke tobacco HG?
No. It is a filthy habit.
yes it is, but still it could be a habit you indulge in.
What about cigars?
I figure it’s possible that if the men around you are having a cigar and a a drink that you might just engage in cigar smoking?
I have had a few cigars, some time ago. No more.
It is a filthy habit. I quit smoking New Year’s Eve 1989. Can’t stand the smell of it now. I would never kiss anyone that smokes.
I’ve been told people don’t really inhale cigars?
That confuses me lmao
I don’t understand the point of them.
It is all about the thighs of dusky maidens.
Very true. You’ve been to Cuba, I take it.
I have.
I know you lie…cause your lips are moving.
I mean I know now but it took me way too long to figure that out.
It’s all the layers. There was a time when things seemed off and I’d say something only to end up in a crazy making fight but things were still so otherwise good. “I love you don’t be so crazy” It’s definitely a personality type attractive to an N who’ll let things go to keep the peace.
Looking jealous or crazy…jealous or crazy, I’d rather be crazy.
Tiny Dancer >>> it was like this for me as well.
It took me 7 years to begin figuring it out on my own amid the layers and word salad, the gas lighting, the denial… but proof was accumulating before my eyes by then, not something I could offer to others but what I clearly saw, the pattern emerging, the truth sneaking out to meet me. 7 years(married + 1 year before that) before the light came on and 9 more years before I broke free of him fully, where I wounded him and sought answers & my freedom, 1 year & 6 months after that to heal although I guess the healing started in the last 4 or so years before I left, even as the abuse escalated I was shedding off the effects of the lies, the word salad, the gas lighting and breaking free little by little which ignited his fury (narcissistic wounds) and made the abusive behaviors increasingly worst… and during which time I almost lost hope of being able to escape but here I am, free, no contact.
it was a long hellish caged 18 years for both me and the child (well 17 for child)
I’m glad you escaped and are free!
Even your truth telling is filled w irony…
So…do you lie to us on the blog?
No. I have no need to do so.
But how can we be sure of that HG?
You cannot be completely sure. However consider this :-
1. It serves no purpose for me to lie in this forum;
2. How often do you see that what I explain and write about, resonates with people? That is an excellent indicator of the veracity of what I write.
Thank you, HG
You are welcome.
Lie😂😂😂 opps maybe the 5 golden rules don’t apply to YouTube live videos. H.G it was actually entertaining to listen to you answer the same question with 5 different answers.
As stated before, I could listen to that voice quoting the ABC’s. ,😐
The lies … The never ending lies .
True.
Sorry, but I don’t believe you.
The lies were a very close second to the anger I felt at being ignored. God I’m glad that pathetic excuse fof a man is out of my life.
Doesn’t matter whether you believe it or not, that is a matter for you but you are wrong.
Duh! No one ever NEEDS to lie, unless its life or death.
True, it isn’t life or death, it’s more important than that (as someone famous once said along those lines).
Alternative facts doesn’t count as lies. Lying is subjective 🤔🤔
Yes, as far as I can tell the information offered here is 100% accurate.
Indeed, thank you Brian.
…. and you have given an answer which, as you have taught us yourself, contains some evident truth to use that as evidence for your other statement to be true, also. The one has nothing to do with the other of course.
However, it is pointless to ask a compulsive lier if he is telling the truth …
There is a riddle about two guards in a room guarding a door each.
The task is to find out, which door leads to freedom. The asker has one question. One of the guards always lies, the other one always tells the truth. How to find out the right door?
(I hope I didn’t get it wrong now.)
If I were to ask the other guard which door leads to freedom, which one would he point to?
The door he’s guarding. Awe, freedom at last or not. HG, what would your question be?
In respect of what Yolo?
Ava
My recommendation is to submit your name for the Dean’s List from H.G. University…🏆🥈
Lol I looked that quote up. Of course it would be about football ⚽ 😉
I am pleased you referred to the game by its correct name.
That is its name 😉
Btw, for all my West Coast homies: Manchester vs Real Madrid in Northern Cali next Sunday!
There is not football team called Manchester, Love.
Manchester United
Who?
Lol. I guess you’re not a fan. 😀
Whatever made you think that?!
I’ll save you a seat, just in case 😉
Most kind, I hope you enjoy watching. And that Real Madrid win.
Oooooo! My friends are paying high $$$ in hopes that won’t be true.
Are u going to be there Mr. Tudor?
At the football match? I would rather have afternoon tea with a Mid Ranger.
Well bring your tea and Mid Ranger buddy along too 😀
No MR is a buddy of mine.
Good to know. I was about to hit BUY on the 2 matching Manchester jerseys.
You mean soccer 😉
To the naughty corner with you!
HG, you did tell somewhere, your next book is published in two weeks… Is there any problem or is it just a lie or an exaggeration? We wait patiently. All of us would understand, if you would say: ” I am sorry, but I do not have the time , right now.” It would be the first way to be honest. And it would be no problem. Believe me.
No problem. Professional commitment has prevailed.
Excellent HG, correct.
As always:
I have just read through a few journals of mine from when I was 19-25 … Yes, what I describe about ex-boyfriends (and best female friend) fits perfectly narcissistic behaviour, I back then never even got the idea to factor in that they might be lying to me. I was just completely numb, totally non-reacting to that behaviour which was so normal for me. 🙁 I have no idea why I didn’t kill myself at some point. Almost did once on the highway, thinking about driving over the bridge with my 2CV. Remember the moment exactly, eating Red Bull Gummibears.
So, to stay on-topic: Thank you for your work once again, everything makes sense for the first time looking through your eyes.
Do you have any idea why I’m not as much as a magnet to normal people or empaths as I seem to be for narcissistic people?
Yes, you have the traits which attract narcissists as per Sitting Target and normal people do not hone in on people the way we do. You won’t attract an empath in the same way either, because they are an empath.
Thank you HG! I just don’t seem to be attractive to empathic or normal people at all. 🙁
But I also think that some have crossed my path which I just didn’t notice myself.
Do you think it has something to do with how normal people don’t charm empaths as much? Are more waiting to be charmed (or asked out) themselves?
Ava101
I think it’s more a case of you have to reach out to the normals and empaths first. In my experience if I reach out to someone, they usually respond. Most people like befriending empaths, they’re just not looking or reaching out themselves. And they will respond much more slowly.
I think you’re just used to narcs. Not only do they look for us and often make the first overtures, but if you reach out to someone and they are excited and respond very favorably, they are probably a narc. Normal people are much more skeptical and will wait and watch before they open up to you.
Hi Windstorm, thank you! I think you might be right. Also, that I’m not good with skeptical, waiting people, that’s right. I am used to narcs and not to normal behaviour, absolutely. I never understood hesitant class mates, for example, who waited a long time to become friends with new pupils. I will have to think about this all a little.
So, I can charm empaths myself? 😉
Have you seen my question to you under “crazed”, Windstorm2?
Have now and answered.😊
Spoken like a true narc!
lol of course he’s a dick
It works for N’s. They manage to avoid consequences.
They will be judged one day. We all will be. Liars do not go to heaven. All liars go to the lake of fire. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=vlb8-p64dAQ
This is only if you believe in the lake of fire and a supreme being who just sits to judge.
I believe the lies told to you here is the lake of fire. This is your even or if you choose, you hell.
This is my reality and yours is yours. So no judgement in the after it is all over. But I see can the comfort of thinking this.
Then we are ALL going to hell because everyone lies to a lesser or greater extent. I, by the way, do not believe in hell. It is something created by man to manipulate others.
Lmnop, my mother always says, that she does not want to go to heaven. It is too boring there….(therefore that is no punishment)
lmnop, my mother always says that she does not want to go to heaven. It is too boring there…. (so that is no punishment at all)
The lies were exhausting!
Can lies ultimately prevail over the truth?
You Lie
The Band Perry
Lyrics
It ain’t complicated
Well, I’ve grown to hate it
I never liked the taste of crow but baby I ate it
They tried to warn me
They said that you were ornery
So don’t bring me those big brown eyes and tell me that you’re sorry
Well you might as well throw gasoline on a fire
The way you lie
You lie like a priceless Persian rug on a rich man’s floor
And you lie like a cooped up dog basking in the sunshine on my porch
Well you lie like a penny in the parking lot at the grocery store
It just comes way too natural to you
The way you lie
That ain’t my perfume
I bet she had a curfew
You told me you were out with the boys and baby I believed you
So why you lookin’ so nervous
You know you’re gonna deserve this
I oughta kill you right now and do the whole wide world a service
Well my daddy’s gonna straighten you out like a piece of wire, like a piece of wire
The way you lie
You lie like the man with the slick black hair who sold me that Ford
And you lie like a pine tree in the back yard after last month’s storm
Well you lie like a penny in the parking lot at the grocery store
It just comes way too natural to you
The way you lie
Well, I’ll tell you what I’m gonna do
I’m gonna drive until the big ol’ muddy river
I’m gonna park my car in the middle of the mile-long bridge
And then I’m gonna cry well maybe just a little
Then I’m gonna slip off the ring that you put on my finger
And give it a big ol’ fling and watch it sink
Down, down, down
There it’s gonna lie
Until the Lord comes back around
Because you lie like a priceless Persian rug on a rich man’s floor
You lie like a coondog basking in the sunshine on my porch
Well you lie like a penny in the parking lot at the grocery store
It just comes so dang natural to you
The way you lie
The way you lie
Well it’s what you do, it’s who you are