The Greater Narcissist – Five Facts
The five central questions have been applied in respect if the Lesser and Mid-Range of our kind, but what of the Greater Narcissist? How do these five essential questions about the behaviour of the narcissist apply to him or her?
1.Do We Know What We Are Doing?
The Greater Narcissist is gifted (though of course his or her victims will not regard it as such) with an awareness of what he or she is. The greater of our kind knows that they are different. They know that they have this insatiable hunger for the outpouring of emotion, whether positive or negative, from those around them. The greater knows that there is a feeling of emptiness which pervades. Whilst the lesser has this manifest as sense of unease and irritation, the greater feels a yawning chasm which must be filled. The lesser operates by instinct, a knee-jerk response. The Greater Narcissist also operates through instinct but there is nothing knee jerk about him or her. This instinct is attuned in the sense of selecting the victims who will haemorrhage fuel. This instinct enables the most effective seduction, the most devastating devaluation and the most callous of discards. The instinct for scenting fuel and those who will provide it serves the Greater Narcissist considerably. He has an instinctive knack for selecting the best hunting grounds, an innate ability to target the most productive victims, a chilling capability to extract and exploit information and to cause people to think that what they are doing is a good thing and one they wish to take when in fact the Greater Narcissist is manipulating them. The Greater Narcissist is aware that he or she is different from other people. He or she knows that their emotional spectrum has been stunted or as we prefer to regard it, altered to achieve maximum efficiency in our machinations. The Greater Narcissist knows he operates in a different world to other people and revels in such a special status. He or she knows that they are superior, admired and feared.
- Do We Know We Hurt Others?
Unlike the instinctive response of the Lesser Narcissist or the instinctive but more controlled moderate reaction of the Mid-Ranger, the Greater Narcissist knows that he or she is an instrument that inflicts pain. Whether it is the withdrawal of something wonderful or delightful or the imposition of something unpleasant and hateful the Greater Narcissist knows that they hurt. They regard every action taken in this regard, every step, every machination as necessary for their survival and advancement. The Greater Narcissist fervently believes in the doctrine that the end always justifies the means. Pain, misery and hurt are by-products of the process which he or she must engage in. The inflicting of hurt on another person is regarded as a collateral consequence of the need to obtain fuel. The Greater Narcissist knows that during devaluation and the malign hoovers that the application of his or her behaviours is specifically directed to cause hurt. You will take the view that he or she does not care and you are correct in that view since the Greater Narcissist, like all narcissists is not created to care. What you ought to understand though is that this failure to care is actually secondary to the need to acquire fuel. If all that mattered was the inability to care, then we would administer hurtful behaviour all of the time. The reality is, the order of priority is that fuel must be obtained and during devaluation this causes hurt to other people and furthermore we are not designed to care about this hurt. By contrast, someone who is manipulating a dislocation back into place knows that pain will be occur but is a necessary consequence of the act. The difference is that this medic or doctor will care that the person is being put in pain and also seek to address that once the dislocation has been addressed.
- Do We Act Deliberately?
Everything that is done by the Greater Narcissist is deliberate. The lesser responds as a matter of course. The Mid-Ranger is largely governed by instinct but with a degree of control available to them they can consider what action to take and do so with a sense of purpose but this pales compared to the behaviour of the Greater Narcissist. The actions that are taken are planned. The seduction is orchestrated from careful target selection, the reconnaissance of the subject and the gathering of information is organised and the seduction is methodical and deliberate. The Greater Narcissist does not speak without first considering how effective those words are. Are they to be used to elevate or denigrate? Praise or punishment? Elated or eroded. Like some great architect in the sky the Greater Narcissist, in accordance with his god-like view of him or herself sees other people as chess pieces which are moved in accordance to his or her wishes to cause check mate. The Greater Narcissist purposefully manipulates everybody around him or her. Each person has a role, a position and a purpose. The Greater Narcissist acts with considerable deliberation and indeed this need to position and pose all the players in the narcissist’s world results in the need to control being overwhelming. To be this deliberate in manipulating other people requires a significant degree of control over other people and therefore the Greater Narcissist will exercise his or her skills to achieve that outcome. The Greater Narcissist regards the manipulation of others as a game and one which is enjoyable to engage in.
- Can We Control This Behaviour
Not only is the Greater Narcissist an expert in the control of others he exerts considerable control over his own behaviour. His higher functioning allows him considerable latitude to pass the blame onto others and feign an inability to control what he does.
“I don’t know what comes over me sometimes.”
“It as if something else takes control of me.”
“I cannot help it, it just happens.”
“It is like there is some other force that makes the decisions for me.”
All of these comments are lies. The Greater knows he lies but does not care. He sees the lies as necessary to provoke his prey, to tie them up in knots, to hurt them and to bewilder them. He finds lying entertaining, part of the game he engages in and a tool. The Lesser and Mid-Ranger also lie extensively but those lies are their truth. They do not know they are lying and any evidence that is shown to them is automatically rejected by the application of the narcissist’s twin lines of defence, Denial and Distraction & Deflection. The Lesser and Mid-Range believe their lies, cannot be persuaded otherwise and will always maintain them because to them they represent their truth from their perspective. The Greater knows he or she lies, revels in doing so and does not care that he or she lies because it is deemed necessary.
The Greater Narcissist is able to direct his ignited fury to a level and extent beyond the capability of others of our kind. This is why often cold fury is exhibited by Greater Narcissists as we are able to control the ignited fury so that it does not emerge as heated fury and rarely does it show in the form of physical violence. Such a reliance on such brutality through physical action is regarded as beneath the Greater Narcissist and is an insult to his Machiavellian mind. The Greater Narcissist revels in his higher function allowing him to devise and apply far subtler and rewarding manipulations. He or she is also mindful of the consequences of providing damning physical evidence of the abuse. The only time this formidable control weakens is when the Greater Narcissist is thrown into Chaos Mode as a consequence of a sudden and unseen cessation to his or her primary source of fuel.
5 Can We Stop It?
The Greater Narcissist could stop his or her behaviour owing to the degree of control that he or she is able to exert but whilst there is the capability to stop this behaviour, both benign and malign, the Greater Narcissist will not do so. Firstly, this is because the Greater Narcissist sees no need to. Why stop something that is highly effective and serves a purpose in allowing him or her to shine and function at some an impressive (to him or her) level? Why halt doing something which always delivers? Secondly, the Greater Narcissist will not stop this behaviour because the malevolence which runs through him or her will not allow him to do so. Why give up such a delightful way of manipulating someone? Why relinquish such power over an individual? Why stop flexing those machinations? Why stop doing something that is both necessary but also enjoyable? The lesser does because he is programmed to always respond in such a fashion. Choice has been removed from his thought process. The Mid-Ranger does because he realises it is necessary for his survival but there is not enjoyment or malice driving the behaviour, it is mainly instinct allied with some awareness that the actions needs to be done because that makes the Mid Ranger feel “better”.
The Greater does because he or she can. The Greater does because he or she is driven by the furious malice which burns at the centre of the narcissist. This malice arises because the higher functioning Greater Narcissist is more aware than the others of his brethren just how unfair and brutal the world is. He is attuned to its attempts to depose and dethrone and he knows that engendering and harnessing this malice is entirely necessary for the purpose of protection. It is better to strike first than be struck. It is better to get the retaliation in first. He who dares wins. The Greater is a dangerous individual because not only does he regard what he does as entirely necessary, he is driven not only by the need for fuel but by the malice that is wrapped around his core. This means he goes further, longer, stronger and more often than others of his kind. He is the defiler, the punisher and the destroyer of worlds. Your worlds.
30 thoughts on “The Greater Narcissist – Five Facts”
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HG,
Curious about some characteristics…
(Narcissist is in his lower 50s)
1. Will a GREATER charm women into lending him money? (This man has put at least one of his EX GFs into chapter 7)
2. Is a GREATER likely to find themselves continually in and out of debt because they are outrageous spenders? (his business is always in danger of shutting down due to his irresponsibility.)
3. Will a GREATER bother with a long distance intimate relationship, when he has to do all the travel to see her?
4. Is a narcissist a GREATER if he does NOT have high status friends?
Or in fact, has very few friends outside his employees? (claims to be an introvert)
5. Will a GREATER NOT make eye-contact with you while he rages at you?
1. Possibly but unusual.
2. Highly unlikely.
3. No.
4. Can be.
5. No.
Thanks HG! Perhaps he’s a mere mid-ranger!
Sorry if it sounded like I took it out on you too much. I was summarizing what you’ve written, and getting a grasp on it all.
You know the scripture: ‘Don’t cast your pearls before swine’. That’s the closest I can think to narcissism. I’ve felt something similar on occasion, that I would rather wear a phony ‘mask’ and let people think less of me than to allow them to ridicule the real me inside. I didn’t need their ‘fuel’ or whatever because I wasn’t impressed by them and felt superior to them. Is this similar to narcissism except you ‘mask ‘ to impress?
Narc’s are completely reliant on others to make them feel good about themselves. You rely on us to be the ‘bigger’ person to end a fight, to turn the other cheek, to still love you after you hurt us. Your outstanding achievements mask your emptiness, your need to be loved and admired. Maybe you’re afraid no one really loves you, maybe you’re the only person you really like. You’re emotionally mentally blocked. In ways you never fully matured, and you are brats. You’re mean, you criticize, you deceive, you betray, you cause real damage to people, even suicide, all for your own amusement. Your achievements might come from using people, stepping over them, backstabbing. You talk behind backs, you malign. That’s not superiority. That’s not impressive. It’s weak. It’s inferior. It’s as talented as a used car salesman. Your talents sexually are learned, precise, instrumented without love, more akin to a serial killers skills, and with faked passion.
You have real talent. But that’s not your priority. We are. We are your obsession, not yourself. You are completely dependent on us to be nice to you or to react in someway as to give you attention. You are a brat, mascarading as a nice person. We hope you grow up.
And…
You look silly struggling to get your 6’ frame up and out of your batmobile, your tailored Neiman Marcus suits that you spend thousands on still aren’t the most fashionable. You spend a fortune on your facade, but pour over every dollar from other expenses.
Am I better than you? Nope. But I do have good taste, I’m the one who notices when you get a new suit, shirt or tie. I know how to shop, inexpensively, for designer clothes that everyone notices.
My Narc Mother complexes can be corrected because you explained it all to me. I’m free to be me. Are you?
Oops, Masquerading!
Greater Narcs are the only narcissists worth interacting with. All of the others serve no purpose. Dealing with anything other than a greater feels as though you are dealing with an amoeba.
Almost right Dr Q, The Greatest Narc is the only narcissist worth interacting with.
Well I clearly learned that lesson last night after that pitiful interaction I had with my first psychopath. How disappointing. I guess he was always that fucking boring.
You’re selling yourself short….
The greatest psychopath…..duh.
https://youtu.be/MYtsSYq4Vi4
I sent this the first time he whipped that mask off for a brief second, I completely ignored him at church one Sunday. Seriously I spoke to the man sitting besides him up in the sound booth then turned and walked away, never once acknowledged him. As he walked by his anger made me turn towards him. That was enough to send chills then looking into his eyes that were now black. The song reminded me of that moment so I sent it to him.
maybe that’s why we’re tested through all kinds of suffering, despair and hopelessness, because we have to build fantasia out of nothing. i love falkor the luck dragon!
i guess it really is just between the wolf of the nothingness and the creatures of fantasia.
Hey, God,
first: big, big thanks for your blog!!! Unbelievable how much effort you spend!!! And what a great help for us empahts!!!
Two questions:
1. What do you think how was the decesion from a deliberately female greater narc formed to get a child? She would know that she wont be a loving mother, uh?
2. @ “I am currently engaged in treatment which has been forced upon me”: what are the effects of such treatment for you? And what’s the qualification of the therapist?
I like your greeting and thank you for the compliment.
1. The Greater female narcissist had a child to create a little mirror. Please read the article ‘Impregnated’ for more.
2. The intended effects are to increase my awareness of my disorders, understand why they have formed, understand and apply ways of managing them in a more constructive fashion, ascertain a way of ‘safely’ breaking down my construct and then re-constructing my true self in a self-sustaining method. They are both doctors of psychology.
Thanks 🙂
HG, I am curious, if you are a Greater, how did you develop your spot-on explanations of the (often differing) thought patterns of the lesser and mid-range so well? Did you grow into a Greater as you matured from childhood into adulthood? Or have you spoken with Lessers and Mid-Rangers? Thank you, and brilliant post as usual.
Hello Anna, no, one does not move between schools. My analysis has arisen from years of observing, interacting with and listening to narcissists of the different schools. I have them in my family, social life, through work and people I work with.
HG, in which way do you extract fuel from written messages, how do you sense the emotions behind words, and how do written reactions translate into fuel?
Is there a difference if you know the person? How do you decipher if you have control over the other person or made her react in a certain way?
How much emotion can written words convey to you?
How do audio conversations improve the perception?
And videos ?
Do you need to see the face and if directly face to face, is what you perceive all through clues that you see and hear in the tone of the voice?
Insults, protestations of hurt, declarations of love and anger all appear in the written word and understanding that provides fuel from the written word.
Thought Fuel arises from knowing the way that person responds.
Written words do not convey fuel on the same scale as in person. Audio conversations improve the fuel because of the tone which conveys emotion and thus fuel.
One does not need to see the face, if physically proximate, but it is preferred.
“I’m not so much doing this to you as I’m doing it for me.” Quote from TV series Dexter which seems to capture the awareness and need.
The amount of pleasure they get from causing pain and the degree of planning involved would also classify them as sadists.
I only repost because I shared 15 years with a monster like you, and want others to know people like you exist and are always on the prowl. You are powerless and a coward! This is my LAST repost as it is only your egocentric response and need to be noticed that you continue to post it is not to educate you are fishing…..
#Menatlhealthawarness #narcissism #sociopath
Thank you, that you changed the advertisement.
I am now reading “outnumbered not outgunned”. Always learning.
Great information. He almost destroyed my world but I have won in the end. I really want to send this to him but I won’t.
an addict is an addict.
the ‘women statues’ is classic Bluebeard, a version of that story is retold in the film Ex Machina.