This is so true and not just jn romantic relationships but between family or in the workplace or anywhere. Ironically my narc mother told me this at a young age that if they are bad talking someone to you theyll also talk about you that way to someone else…guess she knew about smearing 🙄
Ha ha… oh yes! She never loved me, she never took care of me, she was cold, bitchy, never had time for me, nagging and outburst.. we all do … when will he learn its HIM not US!
I hated the fact that he probably said those things about me…but today with more knowledge I simply don’t care to be honest. He can keep his emotional infection.. I’m narc free…. or I still struggle with what happened but I’m done with him if you understand.
I guess its something that takes a while to process… we think we miss HIM and its HE that is why we fall into the black hole… I now understand that it is the experience, the loss of our own souls that are the reason we feel so utterly horrible. Once we realize what a monster we have let into our lives and that we want ME back… it will get better.
SO I’m still BROKEN but have no urge to let the one who broke me back in.
Have a splendid day… I need to go into hiding …it’s hoovertime!
I am glad you said that. This applies to other kinds of relationships with narcissists too. Unfortunately, most people who enjoy listening to the narcissist speaking badly about an alleged abuser known to both parties for hours and hours feel special and better people than the victim.
When someone comes to me and complains about other people behind their back instead of approaching them directly, the first thing that comes to my mind is that this individual lacks problem solving skills and they could do exactly the same thing to me in the future. However, when I confront the narcissist’s audience telling them that they should listen to the other side of the story first and that they would not like it if the narcissist complained about them behind their back instead of dealing with them directly, they tell me that this would never happen to them because they are better people than the victim and she/he has deserved it.
He told me that his previous girlfriend used to hit him. I wish I had known this fact earlier, that what he says about her will be said about me. I like to live up to my reputation. Diva
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Actually, ur eyes r blue so never mind.
Hg, i think that’s u in the pic.
This is so true and not just jn romantic relationships but between family or in the workplace or anywhere. Ironically my narc mother told me this at a young age that if they are bad talking someone to you theyll also talk about you that way to someone else…guess she knew about smearing 🙄
Ha ha… oh yes! She never loved me, she never took care of me, she was cold, bitchy, never had time for me, nagging and outburst.. we all do … when will he learn its HIM not US!
I hated the fact that he probably said those things about me…but today with more knowledge I simply don’t care to be honest. He can keep his emotional infection.. I’m narc free…. or I still struggle with what happened but I’m done with him if you understand.
I guess its something that takes a while to process… we think we miss HIM and its HE that is why we fall into the black hole… I now understand that it is the experience, the loss of our own souls that are the reason we feel so utterly horrible. Once we realize what a monster we have let into our lives and that we want ME back… it will get better.
SO I’m still BROKEN but have no urge to let the one who broke me back in.
Have a splendid day… I need to go into hiding …it’s hoovertime!
I know and it hurts.
I am glad you said that. This applies to other kinds of relationships with narcissists too. Unfortunately, most people who enjoy listening to the narcissist speaking badly about an alleged abuser known to both parties for hours and hours feel special and better people than the victim.
When someone comes to me and complains about other people behind their back instead of approaching them directly, the first thing that comes to my mind is that this individual lacks problem solving skills and they could do exactly the same thing to me in the future. However, when I confront the narcissist’s audience telling them that they should listen to the other side of the story first and that they would not like it if the narcissist complained about them behind their back instead of dealing with them directly, they tell me that this would never happen to them because they are better people than the victim and she/he has deserved it.
He told me that his previous girlfriend used to hit him. I wish I had known this fact earlier, that what he says about her will be said about me. I like to live up to my reputation. Diva
It’s making so much sense now…
Right now all I can do is laugh.
And then some…….of course!