Spectre

SPECTRE

 

Whether you believe in ghosts or not, we certainly behave with certain similar attributes. We appear out of thin air. It is similar to how you can never remember the beginning of a dream can you? You cannot remember quite how we appeared. We just did. We seemed to coalesce into your life with the ease of a ghost walking through a wall. We arrive and ghost into your life. In the same way as seeing a ghost, when you experience us, it is not an event that you will forget in a hurry. We sidle up to you, insert ourselves into our lives and make connection after connection with you as we feed from you. Like some wraith we attach outselves to you and steadily begin to suck the life force from you as we gorge on the fuel that you provide.

Often we will vanish just as we arrived, without any warning or announcement and try as you might you cannot find us again. It is as if we have disappeared off the face of the earth. Naturally we chose the moment of our vanishing act without any concern for its effect on you. We slip away like a mist evaporating. Once we were everywhere, woven around you and captivating you. Much in the same way as one might be transfixed by the appearance of some spirit. You are entranced by our appearance, there is something ethereal and mysterious about us that causes you to be drawn to us and then we are gone.

We are that elusive spirit that can now not be found. You might go to the same place where we first manifested but there is no sign of us. We have left no footprint, no trace of our existence when you try and seek us out, just like our spectral cousins and then suddenly we have returned. We ghost back into your life and continuing our haunting of you. We are incessant and ever present, drifting about you as we resume our extraction of fuel. We resume our draining of your spirit, leeching it from you as our cold, dead hands take hold of you once again.

People have many theories as to what ghosts are if they indeed exist. Some suggest that where there has been a sudden explosion of emotion, a heightened experience, then an imprint has been made on the fabric of existence. This imprint appears to those who are attuned to seeing it. That imprint is seen doing the same thing over and over again. It walks the same route, passes through the same wall and then vanishes only to appear the next night in the same place. The spirit follows the same routine like a piece of video film stuck in an endless loop. Just like such a ghost we engage in the same behaviours over and over again. The same actions all designed to haunt you as we extract our fuel. The same gestures, the same actions all of which must be replayed. Some believe that a ghost is the soul of someone who has suffered eternal damnation. He or she has been denied entry to heaven or hell and instead has been consigned to walk the earth for eternity, stuck in an unceasing routine. Our endless quest for fuel finds us in such a similar position. We must make our way through life, restless and never finding peace. We move from place to place, unable to rest and be satisfied. Instead we are driven onwards, plagued by the curse of our need for fuel. Thus we must haunt others, our appearance bringing dread and fear in the same way as terror follows the appearance of a spectre.

Unable to quite fit in we are ghost at the feast. Even when we have vanished there is a lingering coldness that strikes you to your core. You still sense us, able to feel the effect of our chilling appearance. You are wary and anxious as you know we will appear once again. Quite when is a mystery but as we first arrived and as we first disappeared we will ghost into your life and continue our haunting of you. Better consult that exorcist.

16 thoughts on “Spectre

  1. analise13 says:

    HG, you truly are an exquisite writer.

    I do not just mean on the subject of Narcissism. I mean as writer, as a man of words.
    It is quite the privilege to read your writings and to learn and heal by your hand.

    1. Peppi Boudreau says:

      I agree. HG is a great writer with his words, structure, context, and is exquisitely done. His formation of facts is direct and to the point. He does not sugar coat his information to his viewers. HG provides valuable information about narcissist and how to combat and develop skills to outwit and overcome them. I wonder if he has ever thought about writing books and stories in general about diffrent subjects.

      1. analise13 says:

        Hi Peppi. All so true regarding HG and his work.

        I would so enjoy reading other works of his as well, for pleasure.

        I imagine HG excels in all he does. Failure or second best is not an option.

        He is dedicated, focused and determined.

  2. Patricia J says:

    My experience with a GN he clearly stated he was 85 years in his current body. He was 55 yrs old on paper. I saw clocks fly off walls, even the wood paneling in his bedroom..took on different shapes like ghostly figures. He kept talking about being reincarnated from Teslea.

  3. Diva says:

    “Better consult that exorcist.”

    HG, I am already consulting with an exorcist…….it’s you…….Diva

  4. Noname says:

    Although I’m not “spiritual”, I had the experience with a “ghost” when I was 15.

    There was a forgotten “ghost house” near my grandparents home. People said, that that house has an “angry ghost”. My narc-cousin said “We definitely have to check that theory, sis!”.

    We decided to visit the “ghost house” at night. It was a full moon (very convenient, lol). The house was dark and silent. Nothing indicated the presence of “angry ghost” there.

    My cousin laughed and said “See, no one is here! It is a bullsh*t!”. When he said it, the house started to “vibrate” and produce the strange “sounds” like a moans, wispers. The “atmosphere” became suffocating.

    My cousin grabbed my hand and wispered “My god… Let’s get out of here…”. He tryed to drag me, but I was staying still. I heard the pretty distinctive wisper “Help… help… please”. I mentally answered to that voice “How? What can I do?”.

    And then I started to see “pictures” in my head – the blonde girl in blue dress, the big tree with thick trunk, the ring with yellow stone, knife, the white house with big red flowers painted on its wall… Then those pictures disappeared and silence fell.

    When we returned to home (climbed through a window lol), I explained to my cousin what I had “seen”.
    He said “It was afwul. I was scared to death… All those noises, “vibration”… And you…OMG… You stood like a dead statue with blank eyes! You looked like a ghost! It was awful! But what those “pictures” mean?”.
    I said “It seems I have a clue. I know where the white house with big red flowers is. It guess those “pictures” were a message to people who live there. We have to visit them tomorrow…”.
    “Oh my… You are crazy, sis”.
    “No more than you, bro”.

    On the next day we went to “cinema and park” and found that house. It was situated at the opposite part of the city.

    The grey-haired old man opened the door. Behind his back I noticed the old woman.
    I said “Perhaps what I’m going to say to you will sound crazy, but I have to do it”.
    That man said “Come in” and invited us to their living room.
    I told them everything about our night trip to the “ghost house” and what I had “seen” there.

    The old woman started to cry and said “You just described our daughter who was disappeared almost 24 years ago… She weared the blue dress at that day, she was blond and she had the ring with yellow topaz. That ring was her birthday’s gift we gave her… And the big read flowers on our house walls… She painted them. She was an artist… But I don’t know what the “picture” of the big tree means…”.
    Then old man brought the photo album and when I opened it, I recognized the girl’s face. I said “Yes, it is she…”.

    The old man said “I was a policeman and my colleague-friend and I did impossible to find her, but in vain… No traces. No witnesses. Nothing. She just disappeared in the “thin air”… Could you show us where that “ghost house” is? Do you mind if we all ride there right now”?
    I said “Of course, not! Let’s go”.
    “I’m going to call my colleague-friend and invite him also”.
    “Ok!”.

    When we all arrived to the “ghost house”, the men started to investigate the territory. I stood on the second floor with that old woman and looked through the window at the back yard. Then I realized, that all that time I was staying and starring at the very big dry tree with thick trunk… I pointed to that tree and said “Tree… I “saw” that tree! It was green though, but I recognize its shape!”.

    We all gathered around that tree and the old man said to his friend “I have a showel in my car. We have to dig the ground around it…”.

    They found her… The remnants of bones, small pieces of blue fabric, pieces of blond hair and her ring with yellow stone… They called to police and officially started the investigation. But they never found the knife that I had “seen”. Perhaps it was the weapon of murder, who knows.

    When that story ended, my grandmother said “My own grandmother was able to interact with “ghosts” and “help” them. The people were afraid of her and called her “witch”, but she wasn’t a witch in the truest sense of the word. Perhaps you inherited her “talent””.
    I said “I don’t want it”.
    She said “But see, you helped to that people to get the final closure! It is very hard to lose the daughter and continue to live not knowing the truth!”.
    I said “Anyway, I don’t want it. I want to live in the real world”.
    She said “As you wish”.

    I’ve never exsperienced the “ghosts” after that case, but my dear narc-cousin continues to tease me “my lovely witchy sis”. Lol.

    Perhaps, that explains why I live with Narcs all my life and feel comfortable… They are my dear “ghostly friends” I can easily see and interact with! Perhaps, I don’t live in the real world also. Oops. Lol.

    1. K says:

      That was an awesome story, Noname! I believe in ghosts, too.

      1. Noname says:

        Lol, K.

        I don’t believe in ghosts in traditional (mystery) sense of the word.

        We use now our mobile phones, because the scientists find the way how “befiend” and use the electromagnetic energy, and no one considers them as something “magical”.

        But if we “travelled” to past and showed to ancient people how “we can transfer our words through a long distance”, I bet they would think that we are some kind of gods!

        The same with ghosts. Now we think that they are some sort of mystery, but after a while we’ll understand what that type of energy means and what to do with it. Like my cousin said “After Higgs boson discovery, everything is possible” – whatever that phease means. Lol.

    2. Noname says:

      Continuing my story, I have to say that that “ghost story” had so huge impact on my cousin, that he, indirectly, devoted his PhD dissertation to that topic!

      Once, when he visited me he said “I put the bunch of electrons into closed space with vacuum and influenced different energies and wawes on them and I got the very interesting results! The electrons changed their “behavior” and that “behavior” was unique for each force. Also, they formed the certain energetic pattern and effectively fixed it in the space-time contituum”.

      I said “My dear man, if you are trying to say how smart you are and how imbecillic I am, I tell you, that you have a full success! Now, explain me in plain Russian what that means!”.

      He said “The ghosts, sis. It is very possible that they can exist as an “electrons’s records” and we can “detect” and “read” them” with very sensitive devices”.

      “Wow. Impressive… Sooo, you are going to become a ghost’s helper, right?”.
      “God forbid! I prefer to “read” the women! You women are more crazier than ghosts. Lol”.
      “Ah, I see. Good luck then… Good luck. Lol”.

      1. Twilight says:

        Noname

        Just to be clear. I believe he enjoyed my discomfort. When I meantion children he took me to a place where many children died. I became very upset, I believe he was curious as to how this particular ability work, and knew this would be a quick way to see my reaction.

        We learned many things about each other. He told me what he was.
        I don’t see my ex as evil, the choices he makes I do not agree with and I do not have to. I knew he did many things for a reaction from me, and I gave him a reaction.
        I do apologise I am just running with my thoughts between last night and this morning.

    3. Twilight says:

      Noname awesome yet heartbreaking story.
      I have had this happen more then once, I don’t like it. My ex seemed to enjoy how uncomfortable some situations would be for me. When it comes to children I get upset easily. Apparently I get a strange look on my face. He like to take me to places where murders or death has been. In Virginia there are many such places.

      When my husband was alive we looked at a house and I froze at the door, death. I investigated the history and found out a woman was murdered there.

      I see HGs kind so go figure why I don’t just avoid them. I do now for the most part. My career thou I have no choice, and at the moment we are seriously bitting heads it seems my emotions need to be hidden and I am all like I can not do a damn thing about what facial expressions you get. If you are lying to me I am going to look at you like you are lying to me.

      I am glad to know I am not the only one, I knew yet now I know.

      For the record I don’t believe in ghosts yet I am spiritual. As HG has put it I am an Energy Empath, that is the term I am going by.

      Hope you are having a lovely day!

      1. Noname says:

        Thank you for interesting reply, Twilight.

        I perfectly understand what you do mean and I see that you have an “internal discomfort” when you are sensing “something”.

        I didn’t feel any discomfort, fear or anxiety at that “ghost house”. Actually, I felt nothing. It was like as I got some piece of “information” about event, but I didn’t react in emotional manner on it. It was just an information. And what my cousin told about how I “stood like a dead statue with blank eyes and looked like a ghost” is absolutely understandable. How else could I look in the dark house at full-moon night?! Lol.

        But yes, I sense the “wrong places” and “wrong people”. I call it intuition and my husband never questions it. On the contrary, he relies on it. If I tell him that something is “wrong”, he modifies his actions according to my opinion. He trusts me. But your man didn’t know what to do with your “talent” and just used it to “entertain” himself watching your discomfort. Not wise decision.

      2. Twilight says:

        Noname

        When my ex and I were in the woods he never questioned me when I said we needed to leave we were being hunted. He came to recognize my looks.

        I dont always get images, emotions thou all the time. I don’t like to be touch if I am not prepared, another’s emotions will cause me to react in ways I don’t expect.

        My discomfort happens a lot here. I have almost left a couple of times because of it.

  5. I just could not resist this one. That’s very poignant HG – your timing for such an explanation could not be better. I am currently reading Dr Gabor Mate’s In the Realm of the Hungry Ghosts. It is said in Buddhist philosophy that the realm of the Hungry Ghosts is one 6 levels we incarnate in after death. The Realm of the Hungry Ghosts is one level above the Hell Realms (yes plural). In the Hungry Ghost realm the beings have very small mouths like pins. They have large extended and eternally empty stomachs the size of Mt Meru. Their arms and legs are withered and frail, too frail in fact to move their huge stomachs around.

    In their world sits a large banquet table, it is fully laden and adorned with sumptuous feasts fit for several Kings over not to mention their entire court. However, in the Hungry Ghost realm they are all hungry ghosts, court and all. Their frail arms and legs are unable to carry them to the table and if they actually make it to the table their pin mouths fail them. They are unable to stuff enough food into their mouths in order to sustain them let alone fill their hunger or quench their thirst. They remain eternally hungry.

    As it is above, so it is below. Perhaps you are not in hell after all. I always knew, however, that it is your kind who have been cursed. Perhaps your work will be your redemption.

  6. Merripen says:

    Unsettling in its accuracy. You’ve captured the haunting perfectly, HG.

  7. Fiona says:

    Fantastic text and it is scary how accurate the comparison is!

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