I see me walking away with a bit of his fire after wounding him with backhanded compliments while using that same lack of expression. I will be smiling broadly by the end of that hall while he checks the mirror to see whether his teeth are white enough to light up a room, and strips to examine my claim that its a shame his body hair is preventing others from seeing all his hard work at the gym. Of course he will find my observations to be unfounded due to his grandiosity and delusion-but he will look all the same. Smile.
Beautiful picture… I was looking at it and thinking about how much I like the long empty corridors, mazes, forgotten buildings.
I had my best school friend and he was like me. We visited ALL forgotten factories and buildings we could find in our city.
It was something fascinating to stay among all those ruins and see the signs of “previous life” that no more exist. We tryed to assume what this or that room was for. What the working personel saw through their windows every day. We tryed to resurrect the “previous life” in our heads.
I remember how EMPTY and LONELY those places felt and that emptiness was exactly what I liked the most. The emptiness felt so serene, so comfortable, so peacful. The emptiness is definitely my comfort zone. Lol.
Perhaps, again, that explains why I’ve always lived with Narcs and never felt any internal discomfort. Emptiness!
All you see is an appliance that will provide you with fuel.
The Hobbit and an STD
Apparently, many girls thought my twin was “hot”, I thought he was a colossal asshole but each to their own. A girl became my “friend”; she wanted to hang out with me and sleep over my house (I know, I’m a Gullible Tart). It is Saturday night, she comes over and decides to visit my twin in his bedroom and doesn’t return, hmmm…what could they be doing in there? To hell with it, I picked up The Hobbit and started to read. Later on I found out that my brother gave the poor girl an STD, whatever it was, it was curable and she never asked to sleepover again.
Dr. Q PsyD
My twin is a narcissist and he was quite promiscuous when he was a teen, and although the girl didn’t deserve the STD, I was a bit put out that she had used me to get to him, LOL. This is one of my childhood Tales from The Narc Crypt. There are some crazy ones coming up, so hold onto your hat Dr. Q, and join me for the ride.
K, ty, you are very articulate, so i appreciate that it affected you. And how like an empath to want to insert herself in the story, to keep the tragedy from playing out, to keep the yin from losing herself to the yang. See, even knowing the ending to the story, your hope springs eternal. (Romeo & Juliet must rip your guts, out, too. Yeah, same here.)
narc affair, oh my god, i just got a flickering image of that poor girl’s bouffant-ish bob hairdo all ablaze. grisly.
Words are beautiful (or hateful) and they can be so powerful. They can evoke love, hope, sorrow and heartbreak, and your narrative accomplished that with celeritous ease. The empath’s light is radiant and so full of beauty that I couldn’t bear to see the darkness overwhelm its fragile grace. I desperately wanted to protect the light from the inevitable destruction that awaits. The exigency of her plight was so deeply felt, that a patina of sorrow descended with such rapidity that I was caught unaware and the anguish was overwhelming. And yes, Romeo & Juliet rips my heart out every time I read it.
Aw, K, I really am crushing on your words. They hurt so beautifully. Love that pretty pain. (he was a jerk for ever arguing your use of patina, btw)
Okay, so i have a lot of catching up to do and am looking forward to learning more about you and your voodoo dolls, as well as Jinxy’s sketchy past and (wtf? Cuba?!!) travels.
Hey Merripen…….you haven’t danced until you have danced with a Cuban man!!!!! To be fair…..it may have had more to do with the Black Russians that were only the equivalent of 1 US Dollar a pop, or even free depending on the bar man. I would go back in a heart beat if it were not the case that I am in debt to Fidel Castros old regime…..I might get back in, but I might not get back out!!!!! A very interesting place from what I can remember of it!!!!!!!…….Diva
Diva
Your emerging layers only add to the mystique! I am trying to imagine the scenario that played out to have you in debt to the old regime… It is a starting point for a screenplay, maybe.
Hi Merripen…….oh how you and K make me laugh……it was worthwhile meeting my narcs after all……I have no regrets now……my Cuban story would have to be embellished beyond all recognition to make a screenplay but I have no doubt you and K would be more than capable……Diva
K
We’ll just let it progress organically, then, because I haven’t taken any notes at all and the compartmentalized responses have me going down rabbit holes to revisit, sometimes.
K
I’m composing something for Charlie Rose, too. It is trickier with Oprah, but I’ll forward the same to her camp, too. Maybe repeated mortars will get their attention. I think it.
Ah, there she is. The unenlightened light giver. She holds the fuel potential to light up a city, so there is certainly plenty for your dark little kingdom. Paired with that massive fuel source, and lying just as deep, is her overriding instinct to feel and heal that which is broken. This aligns perfectly with your unending needs, unhealable wound and the instinct to take that which is given. She leans in to the hollow of your heart and you lean in to the hollow of her full awareness. The miss is by inches, but it makes for a precision fit, like yin and yang. That crackle of heavy gravity quickly closes the space between, so that no light can even pass between the union. And so it begins
Thank you, analise13. There is a lot of fodder on this website for expression of the suffering that we experienced. It helps the bitterness to make it visually descriptive, poetic. HG’s technique of flipping us to his side of the mirror has let me begin to see from a different perspective. I’m glad you enjoyed this.
The safest, most productive symbiosis we can share with a narcissist is this ongoing dialog with HG. I have come to enjoy the wordplay in and out of the light and shadows with him. Yes, these words do hold and aching beauty, whichever side of the mirror they reflect.
Merripen
Welcome! You really know how to channel! Excellent writing; it was so melancholic to read, that I wanted to reach into your comment and separate the yin from the yang. I wanted to save the empath from the darkness before it engulfed her and destroyed her light, thus ending it before it begins. Great read!
PS I have some homegrown weed that is very mild and smooth. Sometimes I use it for insomnia; it works really well.
Hello Diva,
I couldn’t help but commenting your post:
“Hey Merripen…….you haven’t danced until you have danced with a Cuban man!!!”. I completely agree with you: danzón, mambo and cha-cha-cha..and salsa of course!
Hello Diva,
Your welcome! Yes I do understand what you are talking about. I do have those dance movements as well kind of in my blood…Warm ,expressive “moves” with incredible life in themselves…
i’m a deep reservoir where affect is always rising, and lack containment and surface structure. intense emotion is psychadellic, sometimes i’m on a trip, involving fear or euphoria. i have to let the streams pour (just cry) or the waves roll out their cycle and find a path through it, like surfing, or sometimes i submerge because it’s more fractured on the surface and calmer in the depths. but in general, ‘geyers’ need to flood and need really strong structure from others, who won’t try to contain us (in small spaces).
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I see me walking away with a bit of his fire after wounding him with backhanded compliments while using that same lack of expression. I will be smiling broadly by the end of that hall while he checks the mirror to see whether his teeth are white enough to light up a room, and strips to examine my claim that its a shame his body hair is preventing others from seeing all his hard work at the gym. Of course he will find my observations to be unfounded due to his grandiosity and delusion-but he will look all the same. Smile.
Fuel.
Beautiful picture… I was looking at it and thinking about how much I like the long empty corridors, mazes, forgotten buildings.
I had my best school friend and he was like me. We visited ALL forgotten factories and buildings we could find in our city.
It was something fascinating to stay among all those ruins and see the signs of “previous life” that no more exist. We tryed to assume what this or that room was for. What the working personel saw through their windows every day. We tryed to resurrect the “previous life” in our heads.
I remember how EMPTY and LONELY those places felt and that emptiness was exactly what I liked the most. The emptiness felt so serene, so comfortable, so peacful. The emptiness is definitely my comfort zone. Lol.
Perhaps, again, that explains why I’ve always lived with Narcs and never felt any internal discomfort. Emptiness!
Ah, finally…our order of the Peach Flambé arrives..
As an ever burning beacon of light and source of fuel.
Next shot: no light, just tunnel.
All you see is an appliance that will provide you with fuel.
The Hobbit and an STD
Apparently, many girls thought my twin was “hot”, I thought he was a colossal asshole but each to their own. A girl became my “friend”; she wanted to hang out with me and sleep over my house (I know, I’m a Gullible Tart). It is Saturday night, she comes over and decides to visit my twin in his bedroom and doesn’t return, hmmm…what could they be doing in there? To hell with it, I picked up The Hobbit and started to read. Later on I found out that my brother gave the poor girl an STD, whatever it was, it was curable and she never asked to sleepover again.
So let me see if I’m following this correctly lol…
A girl used you to hook up with your twin?
After she uses you and hooks up with your twin she gets a nice present in the form of an STD?
Maybe she should stop trying to use people?
Not saying she deserved an STD but I mean … I’m just saying lol.
Dr. Q PsyD
My twin is a narcissist and he was quite promiscuous when he was a teen, and although the girl didn’t deserve the STD, I was a bit put out that she had used me to get to him, LOL. This is one of my childhood Tales from The Narc Crypt. There are some crazy ones coming up, so hold onto your hat Dr. Q, and join me for the ride.
Bahahaha!! *cough* *sputter* *sniff* Thank you, K.
My pleasure, Merripen.
Hold onto your hat too! I am not censoring any of my Tales from The Narc Crypt.
I see an empath holding the bubble of fuel but the first devaluement will be fuel ignited to fury where she gets burned.
K, ty, you are very articulate, so i appreciate that it affected you. And how like an empath to want to insert herself in the story, to keep the tragedy from playing out, to keep the yin from losing herself to the yang. See, even knowing the ending to the story, your hope springs eternal. (Romeo & Juliet must rip your guts, out, too. Yeah, same here.)
narc affair, oh my god, i just got a flickering image of that poor girl’s bouffant-ish bob hairdo all ablaze. grisly.
Thank you, Merripen!
Words are beautiful (or hateful) and they can be so powerful. They can evoke love, hope, sorrow and heartbreak, and your narrative accomplished that with celeritous ease. The empath’s light is radiant and so full of beauty that I couldn’t bear to see the darkness overwhelm its fragile grace. I desperately wanted to protect the light from the inevitable destruction that awaits. The exigency of her plight was so deeply felt, that a patina of sorrow descended with such rapidity that I was caught unaware and the anguish was overwhelming. And yes, Romeo & Juliet rips my heart out every time I read it.
Aw, K, I really am crushing on your words. They hurt so beautifully. Love that pretty pain. (he was a jerk for ever arguing your use of patina, btw)
Okay, so i have a lot of catching up to do and am looking forward to learning more about you and your voodoo dolls, as well as Jinxy’s sketchy past and (wtf? Cuba?!!) travels.
Hey Merripen…….you haven’t danced until you have danced with a Cuban man!!!!! To be fair…..it may have had more to do with the Black Russians that were only the equivalent of 1 US Dollar a pop, or even free depending on the bar man. I would go back in a heart beat if it were not the case that I am in debt to Fidel Castros old regime…..I might get back in, but I might not get back out!!!!! A very interesting place from what I can remember of it!!!!!!!…….Diva
Diva
Your emerging layers only add to the mystique! I am trying to imagine the scenario that played out to have you in debt to the old regime… It is a starting point for a screenplay, maybe.
Hi Merripen…….oh how you and K make me laugh……it was worthwhile meeting my narcs after all……I have no regrets now……my Cuban story would have to be embellished beyond all recognition to make a screenplay but I have no doubt you and K would be more than capable……Diva
K and Merripen
Are you two doing an Empath literary version of Yo Mama? LOL
NarcAngel,
Thanks for the laugh! Here’s a Yo Mama joke for you.
Yo momma’s teeth are so yellow, when she smiled at traffic, it slowed down.
Merripen
Let’s crush on each other and HG’s words. My note taking has slacked off considerably; I can’t remember where I read the Cuba comment.
K
We’ll just let it progress organically, then, because I haven’t taken any notes at all and the compartmentalized responses have me going down rabbit holes to revisit, sometimes.
Merripen
Found it! Diva’s fugitive from Cuba tale is on, How Long Can You Resist, right above the swashbuckling emoji comment.
Oooh…. goin there, now…
NarcAngel & Peaceful
I wrote into the Dr. Phil show again today.
K
I’m composing something for Charlie Rose, too. It is trickier with Oprah, but I’ll forward the same to her camp, too. Maybe repeated mortars will get their attention. I think it.
Merripen
He was a jerk! and I am going to use the word “patina” however I want, damn it.
Ah, there she is. The unenlightened light giver. She holds the fuel potential to light up a city, so there is certainly plenty for your dark little kingdom. Paired with that massive fuel source, and lying just as deep, is her overriding instinct to feel and heal that which is broken. This aligns perfectly with your unending needs, unhealable wound and the instinct to take that which is given. She leans in to the hollow of your heart and you lean in to the hollow of her full awareness. The miss is by inches, but it makes for a precision fit, like yin and yang. That crackle of heavy gravity quickly closes the space between, so that no light can even pass between the union. And so it begins
What a beautiful and visually written interpretation of HGs imagery, Merripen.
Thank you, analise13. There is a lot of fodder on this website for expression of the suffering that we experienced. It helps the bitterness to make it visually descriptive, poetic. HG’s technique of flipping us to his side of the mirror has let me begin to see from a different perspective. I’m glad you enjoyed this.
You offer an earthy spiritual contrast.
As with HG, you both provide highly visually descriptive words.
I am grateful to HG. As I think it is important to see both sides of the equation and not only our side. It has helped me understand.
I agree, analise13. His words have inspired my own and it has made all the difference. I am in his debt for that.
You are thee bright to his darkness.
Words hold beauty and healing.
The safest, most productive symbiosis we can share with a narcissist is this ongoing dialog with HG. I have come to enjoy the wordplay in and out of the light and shadows with him. Yes, these words do hold and aching beauty, whichever side of the mirror they reflect.
Exactly, symbiosis and yin and yang interchange. Wonderful.
Merripen
I like your name. I also like your interpretation of this.
It is beautiful.
Twilight
Thank you. Sometimes his images or writings just strike a chord of creative expression in me!
(Merripen is an old gypsy name that means life. And death. Apropos for the place that we find ourselves. Enlightened empath-phoenix rising.)
Amazing, Merripen!
Your words are beautiful. “The unenlightened light giver” That is exactly what we once were.
“That crackle of heavy gravity quickly closes the space between, so that no light can even pass between the union. And so it begins”
Your words articulate the dynamic with heartbreaking accuracy and alarm.
Hey K, ty, I was channeling us all in the moment I saw her holding that glowing orb.
(plus, i was high)
Merripen
Welcome! You really know how to channel! Excellent writing; it was so melancholic to read, that I wanted to reach into your comment and separate the yin from the yang. I wanted to save the empath from the darkness before it engulfed her and destroyed her light, thus ending it before it begins. Great read!
PS I have some homegrown weed that is very mild and smooth. Sometimes I use it for insomnia; it works really well.
I see the narcs ashes…….. “Burn Baby Burn By Ash”………Diva
Hello Diva,
I couldn’t help but commenting your post:
“Hey Merripen…….you haven’t danced until you have danced with a Cuban man!!!”. I completely agree with you: danzón, mambo and cha-cha-cha..and salsa of course!
Hey Superxena…..it’s good to know that someone knows what I am talking about…….so few do!!!!……..Diva
Hello Diva,
Your welcome! Yes I do understand what you are talking about. I do have those dance movements as well kind of in my blood…Warm ,expressive “moves” with incredible life in themselves…
i’m a deep reservoir where affect is always rising, and lack containment and surface structure. intense emotion is psychadellic, sometimes i’m on a trip, involving fear or euphoria. i have to let the streams pour (just cry) or the waves roll out their cycle and find a path through it, like surfing, or sometimes i submerge because it’s more fractured on the surface and calmer in the depths. but in general, ‘geyers’ need to flood and need really strong structure from others, who won’t try to contain us (in small spaces).
everyone needs/has ‘something’.