Iris
Yeah. I learned not to take my mother too seriously very early in life. She was all the time telling me things never to touch or do because they would kill me. Trouble was, I’d usually already done them several times and was obviously not dead. Lol!!
When I was older and she would say her criticisms she’d make the most awful faces like she was smelling something terrible and talking to me was sooo distasteful to her!
As teachers we give both examples and non-examples to students. My mother showed me so many non-examples of how to be a good mother.
Thank you, HG. Although your explanation is both irritating and painful. I’d rather it was from her being wounded from my not doing what she wanted. I can certainly see it your way, though. Making me so uncertain of my own judgements was certainly very manipulative.
Thinking about this fills me with anger and hatred towards her, both of which I never want to feel towards anyone. I just caught myself feeling a sense of shame for hating my dead mother and then I had the horrifying thought –
“OMG, does her past behavior still have the ability to manipulate me from beyond the grave!!”
Lol!! Our minds and our memories can be our worst enemies when we don’t keep them under control! Instead of her, I’ll imagine a field full of bunnies, hopping in the sunshine – she hated bunnies… 😝
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Haha I can totally understand why Windstorm.
I picture my mum in a horder’s home, as she is such a neat freak 🙂
But to be serious, my mum always disapproved of every thing I did.
She and my narc golden child sister seem to be afraid of everything, which I find unusual since they are often adrenaline junkies.
But in our case, I was the adrenaline junkie and they watch me and disapproved with sour mouths.
Iris
Yeah. I learned not to take my mother too seriously very early in life. She was all the time telling me things never to touch or do because they would kill me. Trouble was, I’d usually already done them several times and was obviously not dead. Lol!!
When I was older and she would say her criticisms she’d make the most awful faces like she was smelling something terrible and talking to me was sooo distasteful to her!
As teachers we give both examples and non-examples to students. My mother showed me so many non-examples of how to be a good mother.
I encountered this it seems but to distract from what exactly HG, enlighten me?
From the fact you are being controlled and providing us with fuel, that you are being manipulated and smeared.
Thank you, HG. Although your explanation is both irritating and painful. I’d rather it was from her being wounded from my not doing what she wanted. I can certainly see it your way, though. Making me so uncertain of my own judgements was certainly very manipulative.
Thinking about this fills me with anger and hatred towards her, both of which I never want to feel towards anyone. I just caught myself feeling a sense of shame for hating my dead mother and then I had the horrifying thought –
“OMG, does her past behavior still have the ability to manipulate me from beyond the grave!!”
Lol!! Our minds and our memories can be our worst enemies when we don’t keep them under control! Instead of her, I’ll imagine a field full of bunnies, hopping in the sunshine – she hated bunnies… 😝
Well that just begs the question…what were all those hysterical rants at my shocking behavior supposed to be distracting from?
See answer above WS2.
Eek image is a freaky one! Projection is a narcs best friend. They make you crazy by their crazy logic and behaviour then act shocked and dismayed.