The Narcissist’s Social Media Laws – No. 1
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40 thoughts on “The Narcissist’s Social Media Laws – No. 1”
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LMAO
Omg…..we went away camping and quadding for 10 days in the summer with his best friend, to the mountains, in a no cell zone area. We had to drive up and out from where we were by the river to access service and did that every once in awhile so we could check emails, do banking, make sure his mom was ok because she just had surgery to have cancer spots removed from her lungs, etc etc.
I had created a photo album in Facebook and tagged all 4 of us so we all could add any pictures that we took while out together.
Boy did he get mad!! lmao
I can still here him sniping at me about posting pictures, minute by minute of our vacation for the world to see. Really though, the problem was that I was the IPPS and he was involved with atleast 4 other women whom he kept telling that he was single and I was just the roommate.
Hmmm, I wonder where I slept on that camping trip; the couch or on his bed with him? Because you know, roommates ALWAYS sleep in the same bed together right? And post pictures together as couples right?
@ Narc Angel
Well said. I agree.
It serves us no good to degrade others.
I was the only one allowed to freely tag him. Then slowly, little by little that was taken away. I didn’t realise it was happening on purpose. I believed the lies “why didn’t you tag me too? “… “I don’t know why it didn’t work”… “you must have forgotten”.. etc
I get away with not getting tagged myself, bc I don’t have a facebook page in my own name.
If I want to post on facebook, i hijack!
>:)
I don’t tag anyone just as a matter of principle.
I care about more about peoples privacy than they do, apparently.
My N seemed to be tagging himself on as many of his HS friends photos as he could possibly have the slightest connection with, even though I advised him it was not a good idea.
But that advice was against his prime aim, so it was ignored.
Mine untagged all photos of not only me, but all of his friends and now he has to approve all posts to his wall. Interestingly, the shiny new NISS or IPSS has tagged him in posts and he does not allow them to be seen. So perhaps for now a DS IPSS. You are wonderful, HG!
And for clarification, the ones my narc friends live in other states, have 3,500-5,000 male friend only, and the likelihood of them being taken in by my narc, “getting theirs”, or becoming victims is slim to zero. His likes just up their post count.
The narc added me as a friend on snapchat and sent me a cool greeting, after unfriending me on other social media a few months ago. I told him “hello” and how much I missed him. Two weeks later, he unfriended me again. I asked him why, and got no response. I thought I had it under control but I’m back to wondering and questioning again. Please HG, can you tell me what he’s trying to accomplish with this erratic behaviour?
I personally think it’s a matter of common courtesy and consideration to ask the person you want to tag if that is ok unless there is an understanding and agreement that it is ok.
What is the paranoid behavior around in my case Facebook?
Damaging the facade, damaging other ongoing seductions by the target seeing the narcissist was enjoying a romantic meal with somebody else two nights ago, exposing the narcissist’s lies because he told his IPPS he was on a golfing trip and ends up tagged in a picture with the DLS draped around his neck at a beauty spot.
What a web 🙂
My ex would wait a bit to approve the tag… but social media is just crap. I most likely should de-friend him (Did unfollow). A lot the events that I am “interested in”, now he magically is “interested” in going. He was NOT on there first. And of course, he is the one suddenly ended things left me to be very confused. Why would you want to go to this wine event? You dont even drink wine that much. He can see that I am going. Just crap.
Narc Angel – I understand where you are coming from and please know that my comment was meant in jest. I have a sense of humor and that was the vein in which my “floozies” comment was meant. I hadn’t meant it as a put down. Here at work we refer to ourselves as “the floozy at the front desk”…
Geyserempath
I understand, and again, my comment was not specific to yours.
Narc Angel – Even if it were directed to my comment, I appreciate your posts and insightful comments. You have carte blanche to question any of my comments as you have healed from your Narc and I have not, therefore I have a lot to learn. xx
NarcAngel,
You still bring up a very good point. I was angry at my N’s mistress, because I told her when he first started working there that I was his wife, not his sister. Before he started up with her. But, then, that was when I believed his mistress was somebody else with the same name,( a very common name).
Then I had to laugh about it. She is no better, no worse, not smarter or more foolish. Just somebody with a heart who fell for the same bs that I did. Just a fellow passenger on his crazy train.
So, yeah, my anger got redirected at the N real quick.
Maybe when it comes to social media, the victims should just post on their wall, “Hey, who else has ridden the crazy train of ________? Did he/she do thus and such? Did anybody warn you? Please like and share on your wall!” >;-)
Social media posting clued me me into the real situation. He was fueling up regularly on his Facebook friends. A constant stream and of course he was in love with all of them. I got into his phone and saw his posts twice. I just had to KNOW.
H:
Me, too. He has many “Facebook Floozies” because he likes to see ‘hot chicks” in his feed…he likes all of their updated profile photos and comments.
I like that “Facebook Floozie”…chuckle. My ex-Narc, would actually carry on full on love affairs.
He was once a bodybuilder, so he would show his pictures of what he once looked like, and would put a bodybuilder act….The “floozies” would fall in love.
Good luck to the bitches.
I understand hurt and anger, but I dont understand why we affix labels like floozies and bitches (and much worse) to women who are taken in by the game and become victims just as we once were. Doesnt sound very empathic or even healthy for that matter. Doesnt doing that and wanting to see others ‘get theirs’ just help to perpetuate the problem? It always sounds like jealousy or low self esteem when I hear that.
I will say though that if having that anger helps to focus away from the pain and anguish that puts one in danger of re-engaging with the narcissist it can be helpful I suppose in a way, but really it’s just wanting someone to hurt because you do. Isnt that what the narc does and what we hate him for? Reassigning his pain?
This is not specific to the comments on this thread. I see it often and was just reminded here.
I was joking…and who are you to judge me? Stay in your own lane. If we can’t laugh then we can only cry. Lighten up.
H
I said my comment was not specific to this thread. I cant help if you tend to make things all about YOU. Lighten up.
Oh please, your know it all attitude, is annoying. Like I said stay in your lane, and I will stay in mine. I am not interested in your opinions.
H
Easily remedied. If youre not interested in my opinions dont read or respond to them. But just like looking at your Narcs social media-I know you will.
It was my thread between me and Jasmine.
Then you stuck your all knowing Narc self into the conversation.
You obviously think yourself all a Narc/Empath expert.
Brings an old saying to mind:
“Everyone is crazy except me and thee and sometimes I wonder about thee”
I agree NarcAngel, it’s does more to healing to think of the victims to come in a sympathetic way. We escaped; I feel so sorry for those who still don’t know what’s in store for them. Good point!
HG
Do you believe Steve Jobs was a narcissist?
I do.
What about Erlich Bachman?
Narcissist.
Madonna?
Narcissist.
HG
Thank you. I thought as much, and while he was no doubt an uber toxic prick in both his business dealings and in his personal life (which I dont condone), it would apear those same traits that made him a prick to some, allowed for the control, drive, and determination that has made Apple one of the most important and successful businesses in the world today and has changed the lives of many for the better (even after his death).
(Sent from my Ipad while my Iphone is charging)
Absolutely the case.
I think he looked very mild and pleasant on the photos with the grey hairs.
But when I image-googled ‘young steve jobs’ I saw that intense stare on every photo. Now I understand.
Good Afternoon HG .. I was wondering about my favorite Oscar Wilde .. Yet each man kills the thing he loves ,by each let this be heard ,some do it with a bitter look some with a flattering word ..The coward does it with a kiss The brave man with a sword ……. I do love the mans wit and charm soo much ! … a bit like yourself maybe ? in a very admiring way of course !!
NA,
You can see his narcissism in the film Pirates of Silicon Valley (1999).
E.B
Thank you for the recommendation. I have not seen it to date.
So looking forward to this series!
I remember the first Christmas I spent with my narcissist ex. He let my mom friend him on fb. She tagged him in so many unflattering photos. I am actually surprised he let her.