The Greater Narcissist – Five Facts
The five central questions have been applied in respect if the Lesser and Mid-Range of our kind, but what of the Greater Narcissist? How do these five essential questions about the behaviour of the narcissist apply to him or her?
1.Do We Know What We Are Doing?
The Greater Narcissist is gifted (though of course his or her victims will not regard it as such) with an awareness of what he or she is. The greater of our kind knows that they are different. They know that they have this insatiable hunger for the outpouring of emotion, whether positive or negative, from those around them. The greater knows that there is a feeling of emptiness which pervades. Whilst the lesser has this manifest as sense of unease and irritation, the greater feels a yawning chasm which must be filled. The lesser operates by instinct, a knee-jerk response. The Greater Narcissist also operates through instinct but there is nothing knee jerk about him or her. This instinct is attuned in the sense of selecting the victims who will haemorrhage fuel. This instinct enables the most effective seduction, the most devastating devaluation and the most callous of discards. The instinct for scenting fuel and those who will provide it serves the Greater Narcissist considerably. He has an instinctive knack for selecting the best hunting grounds, an innate ability to target the most productive victims, a chilling capability to extract and exploit information and to cause people to think that what they are doing is a good thing and one they wish to take when in fact the Greater Narcissist is manipulating them. The Greater Narcissist is aware that he or she is different from other people. He or she knows that their emotional spectrum has been stunted or as we prefer to regard it, altered to achieve maximum efficiency in our machinations. The Greater Narcissist knows he operates in a different world to other people and revels in such a special status. He or she knows that they are superior, admired and feared.
- Do We Know We Hurt Others?
Unlike the instinctive response of the Lesser Narcissist or the instinctive but more controlled moderate reaction of the Mid-Ranger, the Greater Narcissist knows that he or she is an instrument that inflicts pain. Whether it is the withdrawal of something wonderful or delightful or the imposition of something unpleasant and hateful the Greater Narcissist knows that they hurt. They regard every action taken in this regard, every step, every machination as necessary for their survival and advancement. The Greater Narcissist fervently believes in the doctrine that the end always justifies the means. Pain, misery and hurt are by-products of the process which he or she must engage in. The inflicting of hurt on another person is regarded as a collateral consequence of the need to obtain fuel. The Greater Narcissist knows that during devaluation and the malign hoovers that the application of his or her behaviours is specifically directed to cause hurt. You will take the view that he or she does not care and you are correct in that view since the Greater Narcissist, like all narcissists is not created to care. What you ought to understand though is that this failure to care is actually secondary to the need to acquire fuel. If all that mattered was the inability to care, then we would administer hurtful behaviour all of the time. The reality is, the order of priority is that fuel must be obtained and during devaluation this causes hurt to other people and furthermore we are not designed to care about this hurt. By contrast, someone who is manipulating a dislocation back into place knows that pain will be occur but is a necessary consequence of the act. The difference is that this medic or doctor will care that the person is being put in pain and also seek to address that once the dislocation has been addressed.
- Do We Act Deliberately?
Everything that is done by the Greater Narcissist is deliberate. The lesser responds as a matter of course. The Mid-Ranger is largely governed by instinct but with a degree of control available to them they can consider what action to take and do so with a sense of purpose but this pales compared to the behaviour of the Greater Narcissist. The actions that are taken are planned. The seduction is orchestrated from careful target selection, the reconnaissance of the subject and the gathering of information is organised and the seduction is methodical and deliberate. The Greater Narcissist does not speak without first considering how effective those words are. Are they to be used to elevate or denigrate? Praise or punishment? Elated or eroded. Like some great architect in the sky the Greater Narcissist, in accordance with his god-like view of him or herself sees other people as chess pieces which are moved in accordance to his or her wishes to cause check mate. The Greater Narcissist purposefully manipulates everybody around him or her. Each person has a role, a position and a purpose. The Greater Narcissist acts with considerable deliberation and indeed this need to position and pose all the players in the narcissist’s world results in the need to control being overwhelming. To be this deliberate in manipulating other people requires a significant degree of control over other people and therefore the Greater Narcissist will exercise his or her skills to achieve that outcome. The Greater Narcissist regards the manipulation of others as a game and one which is enjoyable to engage in.
- Can We Control This Behaviour
Not only is the Greater Narcissist an expert in the control of others he exerts considerable control over his own behaviour. His higher functioning allows him considerable latitude to pass the blame onto others and feign an inability to control what he does.
“I don’t know what comes over me sometimes.”
“It as if something else takes control of me.”
“I cannot help it, it just happens.”
“It is like there is some other force that makes the decisions for me.”
All of these comments are lies. The Greater knows he lies but does not care. He sees the lies as necessary to provoke his prey, to tie them up in knots, to hurt them and to bewilder them. He finds lying entertaining, part of the game he engages in and a tool. The Lesser and Mid-Ranger also lie extensively but those lies are their truth. They do not know they are lying and any evidence that is shown to them is automatically rejected by the application of the narcissist’s twin lines of defence, Denial and Distraction & Deflection. The Lesser and Mid-Range believe their lies, cannot be persuaded otherwise and will always maintain them because to them they represent their truth from their perspective. The Greater knows he or she lies, revels in doing so and does not care that he or she lies because it is deemed necessary.
The Greater Narcissist is able to direct his ignited fury to a level and extent beyond the capability of others of our kind. This is why often cold fury is exhibited by Greater Narcissists as we are able to control the ignited fury so that it does not emerge as heated fury and rarely does it show in the form of physical violence. Such a reliance on such brutality through physical action is regarded as beneath the Greater Narcissist and is an insult to his Machiavellian mind. The Greater Narcissist revels in his higher function allowing him to devise and apply far subtler and rewarding manipulations. He or she is also mindful of the consequences of providing damning physical evidence of the abuse. The only time this formidable control weakens is when the Greater Narcissist is thrown into Chaos Mode as a consequence of a sudden and unseen cessation to his or her primary source of fuel.
5 Can We Stop It?
The Greater Narcissist could stop his or her behaviour owing to the degree of control that he or she is able to exert but whilst there is the capability to stop this behaviour, both benign and malign, the Greater Narcissist will not do so. Firstly, this is because the Greater Narcissist sees no need to. Why stop something that is highly effective and serves a purpose in allowing him or her to shine and function at some an impressive (to him or her) level? Why halt doing something which always delivers? Secondly, the Greater Narcissist will not stop this behaviour because the malevolence which runs through him or her will not allow him to do so. Why give up such a delightful way of manipulating someone? Why relinquish such power over an individual? Why stop flexing those machinations? Why stop doing something that is both necessary but also enjoyable? The lesser does because he is programmed to always respond in such a fashion. Choice has been removed from his thought process. The Mid-Ranger does because he realises it is necessary for his survival but there is not enjoyment or malice driving the behaviour, it is mainly instinct allied with some awareness that the actions needs to be done because that makes the Mid Ranger feel “better”.
The Greater does because he or she can. The Greater does because he or she is driven by the furious malice which burns at the centre of the narcissist. This malice arises because the higher functioning Greater Narcissist is more aware than the others of his brethren just how unfair and brutal the world is. He is attuned to its attempts to depose and dethrone and he knows that engendering and harnessing this malice is entirely necessary for the purpose of protection. It is better to strike first than be struck. It is better to get the retaliation in first. He who dares wins. The Greater is a dangerous individual because not only does he regard what he does as entirely necessary, he is driven not only by the need for fuel but by the malice that is wrapped around his core. This means he goes further, longer, stronger and more often than others of his kind. He is the defiler, the punisher and the destroyer of worlds. Your worlds.
39 thoughts on “The Greater Narcissist – Five Facts”
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HG,
Would you describe the Greater Narcissist’s self awareness as metacognition or emotional literacy – or a third alternative?
Curious,
WC
I would see that metacognition would be applicable but is not the totality of our awareness.
Thank-you. I appreciate you taking the time to answer.
hg may I ask your opinion on whether you think narcissists are resentful at their partners for falling in love with a fake persona and not their true selves?
Lesser and Mid Range would not consciously be resentful for this reason as they do not recognise it as a fake persona. From the Greater perspective, I do not resent them for that, I regard it as necessary to get what is required. There may be force in it at an unconscious level however.
Thanks, that does make sense
HG, do you feel different states of energy, physically, or even energy centers? Do you feel a high after running, sex, …? Have you ever done breathing exercises or yoga or tai chi and did you feel any change physically then?
One experiences different levels of energy. One experiences the effects of the receipt of fuel.
Breathing exercises have not appreciable impact.
I am not a middle class suburban mother so it is a no to yoga.
I have engaged in tai chi (purely as part of seducing a target) but found it boring, my mind was whirring as usual.
Mr Tudor,
if I could borrow your mind on something.
Have you had the chance to observe the President of the Republic of Poland Mr Andrzej Duda or the former Prime Minister of Poland/ current President of the European Council Donald Tusk?
Would you say it was possible they were Greaters?
Both great answers, thank you. Oh, there was one more great star, Zbigniew Komorowski, the former president, which took over after half of the government died in a plane crash in Russia.
I just heard on TV that Tusk used to say about Putin, “This is our man in Russia” – made me burst out laughing.
So you see, it just boils down to our national fun history – as many of such great people on TV as in front of the screen. We learned to live with it, while not knowing any better, and so can you. Just prepare to be drinking lots of vodka for two generations;) No, not your fancy colourful alcohols. The real spirit!
I have my theories. Will appear in my answers to SX for sure.
Or maybe not.
Zbigniew Komorowski ??
I haven’t, no.
HG,
I’ve read, in the stories of others, where the pain of leaving a narcissist (and coming to terms with the fallout from that) was worse than the pain of the abuse suffered within the relationship.
When your work contributes to the “weaponizing” of empaths, and as result deprives other narcissists of fuel, do you gain anything (fuel) from knowing (cognitively) that you had a part in the empath’s experience of pain from having separated from their narc?
Or is it like the metaphor of fixing a dislocated shoulder, where similar to the medical professional, you simply acknowledge that the pain is part of the process of mending the shoulder?
Thank-you,
WC
Yes, others have mentioned the point you make in your first paragraph and one can see in what people write how that may well be accurate.
I do not gain from envisaging the pain of the victim’s escape from their narcissist but rather I do receive a little fuel from their gratitude at having achieved that escape etc. I receive many appreciate e-mails from very grateful people.
Thank-you for your answer. I verily believe that they are extremely grateful.
HG
I hope i get some answer to this post. Can middel range be cunning and calculating too. I am asking, as one in my Office is middel range but very calculating. But as she looses her temper very often, i cannot Place her as greater.
Upper Middle Range will demonstrate calculation. MMR will also, but only very occasionally.
Thanks HG
I really appreciate your reply. What is so interesting about her is that she backstabbed one colleage some two year ago and later become a good friend with her as if nothing happened. Now again she is instigating this old colleauge and others against the head of our department. She is hoping to apply for that position if only our head should resign out of frustration.
You are welcome.
Sniglet,
I just love you!
You are like HG’s persistent, caring, cute Fairy Godmother. You’re the best… however, if HG is at all like “my” narcissist (and I think he is), he has his own timeframe + likes everything to be his idea/under his control/loves his decision-making freedoms. You know how these narcissists can be.;-) I actually say that with affection, as I find my own narcissist to be the most interesting, desirable man I’ve ever known…which truly makes me question (and berate) myself. But I won’t pretend otherwise. Anyway, thank God I’m traveling far away soon, because my narcissist is currently proclaiming he wants to marry me and “have our baby.” (clearly, my NC is failing + I am too).
You keep being you, Sniglet. You’re adorable… and an awesome investigative reporter.
Hg
Are all greaters cunning? Is there a degree of it a narc has to have to be a greater? I ask because my narcs sister is highly cunning and my narc is not so much, but he is so calculating. Also, is your mom cunning and highly calculating? Thank you.
As cunning as a fox who is Professor of Cunning at Oxford University.
I would like to read the article about Greater vs Greater Narcissist. You wrote to someone that it will be posted soon. I have not seen it yet. Have you stopped writing for a few months, HGT?
No I have not stopped writing Sniglet, although I have not been writing as much owing to other factors. The article will appear, I am pleased you are looking forward to it.
You are very talented and cannot stop writing. Well, you could but you should not. Perhaps you may wish to write about other subjects also.
Thank you Sniglet, I appreciate that. There is a lot I have written about which has yet to see the light of day and there is plenty more I wish to write about.
Why hide your work?! Finalise at least one and publish it. See what happens… you have nothing too lose. You will get those who will enjoy it. For those who don’t, who cares?
I’m not hiding my work. They are not finalised.
I’m looking forward to a good murder mystery from you, HG.
It would be fictional, right?
But seriously… the possibilities are endless on what your subjects. I agree with Sniglet. You are too talented to not share your work in another fashion.
Thank you BKK, I will endeavour to do so in the fullness of time.
Okay. I just butchered my writing. (That’s what I get by trying to multi-task at work.) But what I was trying to say… the possibilities and subjects are limitless.
I’m so glad Sniglet addressed this as I have often wondered, since HG Tudor is a pseudonym, have you written other works under another pen name?
It is clear that there is much imagination going on in your head. Sniglet is right. I know I would enjoy something displaying an additional side to your creativity.
No I haven’t.
I hope you post some of your other writing HG like the horror type stories(alfred hitchcock/edgar allen poe).
Very interesting article. The Greater Narcissist can be vicious, controlling and cunning.
#5 – Because you can. Because you have the gift of awareness, which is rare. This recognition is the first step. Then comes desire, which is apparently non-existent… but it doesn’t have to be. The desire to change might bring unforeseen gifts. The rewards could be greater than anticipated. Definitely, the comfort of peace brings about beautiful sensations, even for those who avoid connecting to their deeper feelings buried and hidden within. The greatest rewards rarely come without hard work and certainly without discomfort. It is true; people rarely change. But we can. And we should.
Because often, it’s the right thing to do.
Definitely familiar. Very chilling.
So is there any difference between the Greater N and a Sociopath? And if so, what?