Lonely

lonely

 

I like it when you are lonely. That is my favourite place for you. When we first meet if you make mention of feeling lonely, or send a self-pitying tweet decrying your loneliness then I am straight on to you. You may as well have taken a knife to your chest, slit it open and shouted, “Come and get me.” Those in a state of loneliness are massively susceptible to my overtures when I decide to engulf you in my bombardment of flattery and zealous appreciation. Those who have tired of their single status and wallowing in solitary confinement seize on this interest of mine. The red flags may be fluttering but you never see them or if you do, you think “how pretty”.

I may make you feel wanted and special but all I am doing is moving you. I am transporting you from loneliness in the real world to isolated splendour in my false reality. Once I have positioned you there I shall busy myself cutting you off from family, friends and acquaintances. You will readily go along with my fabricated denigrations of people you once held dear and who you saw regularly. You want more of the sugar that I am pouring on you. To do that you need to spend more time with me and thus less with anyone else. It is hardly a sacrifice though is it? Any dissenting voices are marginalised by cleverly constructed smear campaigns against these people (watch out – that campaign will be used against you in the not too distant future). You are an eager co-conspirator happy to discard these people (how can you be so callous?) with the repeated promise and reward of more of my intoxicating attention.

Once all those ties have been cut you are mine. You are dependent on me for everything. You have nobody to turn to and thus your focus will always be on me. As you try harder to please me, the realisation of your isolation becomes all the more apparent. You can feel the tendrils of loneliness wrapping around you once again. I know you will feel this and I know you will do all the more to cling onto me, your life raft, your beacon of hope in the wilderness. Anything to avoid being left alone. I am afraid it is too late. Your isolation was sealed the moment you listened to me. You are so alone nobody can hear you scream.

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12 thoughts on “Lonely”

  1. Mine tried to make me lonely all the way possible. But he is not at all successful. In such a case what you feel HG?

    1. Do you mean if I tried to make someone feel lonely and failed, how would I react to that failure?

  2. Would a narcissistic mother isolate her own children from their friends and even family (cousins)? Or choose which ones suit her?

  3. This is the truth and then some! My narc never smeared or tried to isolate me but i in a way isolated myself by becoming so absorbed in him. When i wasnt with him id feel lonely being away from him. Narcs take a weakness or void you have and they fill it completely so you turn to them for that drug to make the void disappear. You wind up absorbed and isolate yourself. Im slowly getting away from it. Im trying to relearn how to enjoy my time on my own without always having him on my mind. Relearning who i am away from him. At times it feels very awkward and i feel moments of lonliness set in but im mindful of where the emotion is stemming from. Also my fear of him abandoning me im facing so i can detach slowly and be me again with no fears.
    Im tired of being afraid of lonliness and want to fix it myself and not rely on my narc to do it for me. Its just another way he can manipulate and control me.

  4. Congratulations HG for hitting 9,000,000!! You are the best at writing about narcissists, the numbers don’t lie!! You should be very proud kind sir!! 👏 👏 👏🍻😘

  5. That is so true. Alone and lonely. Before him I felt alone- once he looked at me and said “ you and I are the same , alone and lonely, except you are a good person and I am a bad one. That is the only difference. “

    Last time before I escaped , I felt that loneliness like a beast – being alone is fine – being lonely is painful especially when there is a spectator looking and feeding of your loneliness.

    “ see friends, do something, don’t stay alone”
    “ being with me implies being alone often”
    “ that hole … “

    The infection make us feel lonely and we are alone because we are infected.

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