The Narcissistic Icicles – No. 1

THE NARCISSISTIC ICICLES-1

 

This is a meme which encapsulates the mind set of the narcissist towards you.

98 thoughts on “The Narcissistic Icicles – No. 1

  1. IdaNoe says:

    Oh yes I can. All it takes is something sharp and pointy!

  2. Chihuahuamum says:

    Everpresence 🙁 i think with any loss its hard to move on and they are always in your mind but with narcissists closure has to come from within moreso. Grief takes time to heal from. Its like a death and so many memories engrained into your life both good and bad. Change can be so difficult to grasp even if its change for the better.

  3. Caroline says:

    Iko, thanks for memo to the Justice League.
    Strap on the tasers, super empaths!

  4. Iko Flugel says:

    To @windstorm, @NarcAngel, @SMH and @Melinda: I need to quote my triangulation sister (IPSS) here. She said that when a narcissist is exposed to the ideas of MRA, MGTOW and neo-masculinity it’s a “Narcissism on steroids”. Such ideas are highly indoctrinating for the narcissistic type of males (as communism, fascism, Islamic fundamentalism, etc); provide them with well reasoned “scientific” arguments for their demeaning behavior.
    To @SMH – I believe Jordan Peterson is against MRA because he called them “Pathetic weasels” when interviewed.
    Chin up!
    Knowledge equals power!

    1. SMH says:

      Glad Peterson is not encouraging this. But still, they will take what they want from him, Iko. And yes, it is an ideology that justifies certain types of behavior. Good point.

  5. kelly says:

    Why would you always want to be in our head and our heart if you are finished with us and you no longer think about us? I.e. you have moved on. What’s the point?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      So you can be hovered at a later stage more readily.

  6. Bubbles🍾 says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    I never “dwell” over the weasel, in fact I feel numb regarding him. I really just don’t care what he does. Meh!
    Why would I want to look him up or see what he’s doing after the way I was treated ….I’m not a glutton for punishment …. he’s a narc …. no thanks

    I blocked deleted unfriended everyone
    I’m the one who has a fake profile … it’s for my family only

    I’m here to understand their behaviour, self preservation and know my worth

    Peace now reigns supreme

    Thank you Mr Tudor
    Luv Bubbles xx

  7. wounded says:

    How can you tell a fake account on social media?

  8. Iko Flugel says:

    Hi, everyone! I made an important discovery: The MRA (men’s rights activist) movement’s ideas can boost strongly the narcissistic traits in your male partner. MRA postulates that men are the real victims of modern society; that they suffer from the female oppression, that all females are crazy bitches and need to be put in their place. There are even video-lessons on how a “real man” must train his woman like a dog.
    The new (ex?) intimate supply of the narcissist who triangulated us both for a wile contacted me (that was very brave of her! my admiration, sister!) and she explained to me that he was very much involved with MRA movement. So in fact in the devaluation&discard phases we were actually subjected to all the freaky “methods” the MRA advocates recommend to be applied on a woman.
    It all clicked like a jigsaw puzzle for me.
    Cheers!

    1. Melinda says:

      Bring it on, Fellas. (Thx 4 the tip Iko)

      1. Iko Flugel says:

        Yep, the same is with MGTOW – “men go their own way” – they go their OWN way….they go…straight down the toilet and we just need to flush.

    2. NarcAngel says:

      MRA aka Misogynist Ruling Assholes. Actually I thought most men had these beliefs. I just didnt know they formed a proper club and have members only jackets.

      1. SMH says:

        It has occurred to me that narcissism and Aspergers, which do overlap in some respects, are versions of the extreme male brain – empathizing-systematizing spectrum. Men are weaponizing those ideas through these men’s rights movements. A Canadian guy, Jordan Peterson, is the leader of the pack. Might explain all the Canadian narcs.

        1. NarcAngel says:

          SMH
          Is Jordan Peterson your ex?

          (Just teasing. A throwback to the previous discussion about some of you thinking you had the same Cdn narc and me stating we have more than one).
          Thank you for putting him on my radar.

          1. SMH says:

            Hahaha. Ex is probably a cult member.

      2. windstorm says:

        NarcAngel
        Did you ever watch “Married With Children?” This reminds me of Al Bundy’s all male club, NO MA’AM.

        1. NarcAngel says:

          Windstorm
          I know of the show enough to reference Peg or Al Bundy but thats it.

          1. windstorm says:

            NarcAngel,
            Aw that’s a shame. I imagine I’ve seen every episode multiple times. It’s a family of 4 glaringly obvious, insensitive, lesser narcissists and how they constantly screwed up their lives. There was a lot of humor.

            We watched it as a family when the kids were young. I’m sure that would be considered irresponsible parenting by many, but I used it as an object lesson.

      3. Iko Flugel says:

        Hi, NarcAngel. Definitely Extremely Misogynist Clubs. I was kind of surprised as well when my triangulation sister sent me the links.
        Never seen such hatred in my life!!!!
        It turned out that this movement (MRA) and MGTOW (men go their own way) tend to attract mostly men with strong narcissistic traits. Those “clubs” are very popular. Their so called “members” and “activists” are mostly insecure men – “PATHETIC WEASELS” which were severely burnt by some of our kind.
        Their tenet is never to enter a commitment relationship with a woman, never to meet her emotions, always say “No” to her…and so on.
        I am curious about HG’s opinion on this.

        1. windstorm says:

          Iko
          I’ve never heard of anything like these women hating groups you describe. I can’t imagine them being here in my area. Seems like a man would have to have no confidence and self respect to belong to such a group. If they are full of narcs, they must be sniveling midrangers.

  9. SuperXena says:

    @Windstorm
    “If someone blocks you, how would you ever know if he made up a fake profil or opened another FB account? ”
    They open another fake account “just to check”. Do not ask me how I know…naughty,naughty me. It is exactly an example of when the emotions take over…

    1. NarcAngel says:

      All this social media blocking, unblocking, constant checking, and analyzing, seems like a lot of time and work for someone we supposedly dont want, and yet empaths will say being a narc must be exhausting? Seems like the same thing to me: addiction.

      1. SuperXena says:

        NarcAngel,
        I completely agree with you. It is an addiction as well.

      2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dear lovely NarcAngel,
        Would you please stop making perfect sense … Im struggling with you being right all the time
        😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
        Luv ya sweet cheeks 😘
        Bubbles xx

      3. SMH says:

        It is!

      4. Melinda says:

        Yes NA. And it is exhausting being hypervigilent all day. My addiction is getting better, oh so slowly. But I’m happy again. I have hope for MY future. I saw my therapist today and we talked about antisocial personality and NPD. I disagree with her on my recovery because she doesn’t get the totality. But HG provides and all you fellow bloggers provide also so I’m going to stick with you all!

        I got triggered big time. Plus I drove past places we use to go out to. I am not moving which I know as a geographical escape. I can heal here and I’m not running, changing my cell #, etc. NC isn’t easy SOME days but I’m a rookie at this. I am where I am to learn how to take care of me.

      5. Lori says:

        I dunno took me all of 5 seconds and s couple of key strokes to look. I look at a bazillion other things on Facebook besides that and I can do it all in about 5 minutes.

        I also on ocassion look at narc 1 whom I lived with years ago. I’m not pining for him. I feel nothing but curiosity toward him but then again I looked a guy I knew in high school cause my friend said girl you gotta see. It’s not exhausting at all.

        Personally, sometimes I find it challenging to work the puzzle.

      6. Lori says:

        What will become exhausting is trying to change the situation or the outcome. Try as one may the outcome is will always be the same. Once you understand and accept that piece, watching the behavior and predicting what will come next or even watching what HG says come to fruition becomes fascinating. But even after enough time passes, you bore of it. I once thought I would never get over Narc 1 as long as I lived. Well, guess what ? I did lol. I am completely indifferent to him. I don’t need to block him. I have zero interest and I’m not the least bit attracted to him. If he spoke to me I’d likely reply because well I just don’t care. I do not have any of those types of feelings toward him. I neither really like him or hate him. It’s just true indifference. Now one might argue that I simply transferred all my narc 1 issues to Narc 2 now I can see that as plausible. All I know is I can now be around Narc 1 and feel nothing.

  10. wolvesinwalden says:

    If you read this from the perspective of the mechanism which drives the narcissist to seek fuel, the inverse seems to be true as well, albeit not for the same reasons. You’ll never be free of the compulsion to acquire fuel. The insatiable need for fuel drives you, where the often desperate impulse to nurture healing in another drives the empath. Particularly with the super empath, I’d think, but maybe that’s just my narcissistic traits perceiving themselves as more important than they actually are. What prospect of healing would be more rewarding (and show the prowess of love/devotion/hope/whatever warm and fuzzy concept the particular empath in question holds most dear) than to fix that which instinctively and compulsively resists fixing? The unstoppable force meets the immovable object, so to speak. To you, of course, we’re all just appliances pumping out fuel with every bleeding little beat of our hearts. Where we’d derive satisfaction from teaching the wounded to thrive, you’d pull similar satisfaction from inspiring an intense response whether unkind or reaffirming of your apparent magnificence. Without fuel, the narcissist is not satiated. Without being of benefit to something (at times, anything) greater than ourselves, the empath’s ego isn’t fed. A desperation to inspire some tangible affect in another runs through both sides of this spectrum. The duality in this power dynamic is striking, to me.

    Detaching from the icky feeling of irrevocably being ensnared in this web despite not marrying him or having the fool’s child (thank every deity, despite my lack of belief in any) may require a scalding scrub with a steel wool loofah. Some kind of decontamination shower feels necessary. Like, on a soul-level. Anybody know of a place that does transcendental dermabrasion?

    1. NarcAngel says:

      Wolvesinwalden
      I enjoyed reading your logical analysis complete with graphic and amusing ending. I do hope you have removed the ick with minimal trauma to your derma.

    2. Lori says:

      This is why narcs and Codepebdents are attracted to each other. A narcissist has an insatiable need for fuel and the Codepebdent is is compulsive fixer that is why these 2 types have a very hard time completely staying away from each other. This is why a narcissist prefers a Codependent and a Codependent consciously or unconsciously prefers a Narcissist. These 2 fuel each other

      1. Chihuahuamum says:

        Both can be codependant. If you keep going back and cant break free then id say youre codependant on that person in some way.

      2. Lori says:

        True Codependecy is on a much broader spectrum than just that of the Narc relationship. That is but one facet.

        I think continuing to go back could be indicative of codependency but it’s not the only factor

        Codependents learned to base their worth on fixing things

        But it is true that a non Codepebdent will have an easier time with no contact

  11. MB says:

    Where Quasi been? I miss her!

    1. WhoCares says:

      Yes, MB, I was wondering that too…haven’t read a comment of Quasi’s in a while.

    2. Quasi says:

      Hey lovely MB, and who cares … I’m here, still reading… I just think I have run out of things to say – who da’ funk it!
      But I could not, not respond to you.. I always have words for You. At this time those words are thank you, your both pretty amazing human beans’, and I likes human beans’ …Qx

      1. MB says:

        Quasi, I likes human beans too and you’re a cool bean. I’m glad you’re still here. Thank you for checking in so we can see you. x

        1. Quasi says:

          Hey MB,

          I’m glad you got the reference! I thought after I sent it that you may not have read BFG. My little boy is reading it for like the fifth time, we read together every night, so the dialect of the BFG is intermingled in my expression at the moment . I like the term cool beans to..

          Being honest MB I was edging away from the blog, I had attempted some indirect goodbyes on Sunday, as I did not want to make a thing of it. But I also wanted to advise all here how much they have meant to me. Tricky one.
          I believe I got to a stage thinking that I was reflecting on him often when I was commenting more; and it was keeping a link to him. I need to let the string to him go.

          Regardless of how often I may comment I’m still here and reading, I’m here if you need me lovely. For a random song for a smile or a kind word to remind you of how amazing you truly are. I’m here…

          I have been reading all as I find this of great value, I have also finally finished fuel and fury. I had 5 books on the go and no time to read them. However I was on holiday and away from home the last week so caught up on my reading. You were right, they are brilliant. Light blubs going on all over the shop… everything makes more sense.

          Thank you MB, for thinking of me and expressing that you did. You have made a real difference for me since I joined the blog. Qx

          1. SMH says:

            Hi Quasi, I too know BFG. Loved the film too. I get it – I too sometimes feel that posting here keeps me linked to the narc. I try to see it more as a hobby now and a break from other things (like right now packing so boxes and stuff all over the place). You should enjoy your family life and not think about silly old narc. Remember: abducted by an alien bean! xx

          2. Quasi says:

            Abduction by an alien bean is the best description ever ! Thank you SMH… you always make me smile… I hope the packing goes well, new beginnings! Take care lovely.. Qxx

          3. HG Tudor says:

            If the alien bean uses a death ray, does that mean it is a baked bean?

          4. SMH says:

            It’s a black bean, HG. A turtle bean. It pokes its head out of its shell, bites you, and then withdraws.

          5. HG Tudor says:

            Savage.

          6. SMH says:

            Hey I make wicked black beans (and make black beans wicked).

          7. Quasi says:

            Either that or a wrinkly emperor bean in a super fly cloak …. ewww … I guess the human beans that he aims at would be baked beans .. or dust. But like dust they will rise!

          8. analise13 says:

            HG that was funny.
            If he uses it twice, it is a refried bean?

            HG, I often wondered.
            When well fuelled off blog.
            Do you find you are more engaging on blog?
            By that I mean more humorous and “lighthearted”.

          9. HG Tudor says:

            More thank likely.

          10. MB says:

            Narcs have “moods” too, HG? Well fueled = good mood?

          11. HG Tudor says:

            It will appear that way.

          12. MB says:

            Golden period makes you giddy!

          13. MB says:

            Quasi, I love BFG and Roald Dahl. I want HG to do readings of it for the school kids. Or for me. (I’ll listen to him read anything.)

            I completely understand your wanting to distance yourself so you can move on. I’m glad you still hang around a bit. Be sure you reach out if you have hard days. You know the Tudorites will rally.

            Thank you for all the sweet contributions. I’ve always enjoyed your very thoughtful posts.

          14. Quasi says:

            Thank you, that means a lot to me lovely MB… Qxx

      2. WhoCares says:

        Quasi,

        Re: the BFG, I only know the movie (and I loved it) but I bet the children’s book is wonderful…

        All the best to you! Like MB, I will miss your insightful reflections. But I understand wanting to distance yourself from memories of your narc. I too find myself dwelling on my narc’s past behaviours (because of reading here) but I try to use those instances to better understand *me* – not him – when reflecting on the dynamics.

        Take care & hope you do check in from time to time!

        WC

        1. Quasi says:

          Who cares, thank you so much, it means a lot to me, your kindness has always been felt, and very much appreciated..

          I think for me it’s just that I have done what I do- an intense break down and psychoanalysis of the whole situation, in a short period of time, more painful and abrasive to the soul but it helped me longer term.

          It is also Absolutely due to the fact that my time with him was so short and my role for him was insignificant- well I’m sure that is how he views it anyway.
          To me it was significant as I have been lucky enough not to have met a narcissist until now, so my sensitivity to being manipulated by him was quite high, and it had a significant impact on me. I also cared for him a great deal, no amount of logical reasoning can remove what was felt. But it can reason why I do not want to feel it again.

          When I have commented with reflections of my experiences with him, it has been so cathartic for me, it has helped me so much to share with you all and to read so many kind responses, thoughts questions and feedback.
          I do not believe that I would be where I am mentally or emotionally had I not started participating on the blog.
          You are all in my heart, very much so.

          I feel I know as much about my situation and myself as I can now, and further in-depth reflection may be detrimental rather then helpful. I want to let him go now..

          Saying that I love reading the articles, enjoying HG’s skills in writing and learning from his perspective. I’m sure I will be piping up from time to time, just not as in depth or prolifically as I have been lol.. ; so this is probably a good thing for you all, as a reduction in epic comment posting .. ( although this seems to have transformed into an epic)

          Who cares, I saw him again this afternoon, he just happened to turn up to the venue my friend was having her baby shower… odd but hey we have established he is in fact a wee alien bean!

          Same situation I did not acknowledge him, he did not speak to me, however he did walk past me once very close, and I felt his fingers stroke across my lower back as he walked past. Shudder! But not a good shudder, a “back off wise guy” shudder, a shudder that reminded me of the last time he touched me..
          He would have to raise his hand to do this as I am very tall ( a kinder nickname in school was the BFG lol) and he is about 5ft6” so not a natural resting hand position; it was clearly purposeful. What purpose is anyone’s guess, to cause a reaction for me to turn and tell him to **** off, to cause me to respond in some way or just put himself in my head again- wanting me to question the meaning. Or he intends to Patent a new hoover subtype! The stroke hoover !

          The reality was I didn’t respond and continued to ignore him. The militant part of me purposefully spent a long time speaking with an attractive younger male friend ( who was actually invited to the baby shower) someone he used to hate me talking to, he would make it very clear that he did not want me to be near this guy when we were (“friends”). Telling me that he didn’t like the way he looked at me, his tone used to change when he spoke of this guy, almost hissed his name, maybe trying to contain his fury at the time.. my response to that comment at the time was to ignore what he said and move on.. my inner monologue was “I’m not your property and I speak to who I like”.

          So childish of me, but I also just like chatting to this guy, we have great banter and he is an actual friend to me, with boundaries, respect and care for one another- oh this might be because he is not a narcissist!! Lol

          Again another friend ( who has become very protective of me and keeps her eye on him) advised me that the narcissist was looking at me a lot… urgh…

          I’m getting used to the fact that I will continue to see him, we live in a small town and it’s just going to happen from time to time. All I can do is keep my distance or leave.

          I don’t feel anxious when I see him now, the only thing I feel fleetingly is a little sickness, as he had me, he had what he wanted from me, but this thought does not help me, so it does not stay in my mind for long.

          I don’t want him to be a focus in my life anymore. I’m letting go.

          Qxx

          1. WhoCares says:

            Quasi,

            I don’t want to keep you here by commenting back… (wait – yes I do!) But I just wanted to congratulate you on how far you’ve come in resolving your feelings around your narc. I totally get the ‘small town’ thing when it comes to narcs (so hard to avoid). I’m congratulating myself too – I had to see my narc yesterday (outside of the formal process we’re in, due a scheduling blip)…and I felt nothing. Nothing. Not even nerves. He tried to ‘corner’ me, but I ignored him and just kept walking by. Yay me!

            (Re: the small town problem – I have to see the silver lining in this one too – once I’ve scouted out all the narcs in my daily dealings, I’ll know ‘the lay of the land’ and I feel that gives me an edge…)

            Hugs,
            WC

          2. Quasi says:

            Who cares,
            ( pretend there is a cheerleading squad rocking out a dance and whoop whooping )

            Definitely yay you!

            To ignore him and control your reactions is one thing, but to get to the stage when you actually don’t feel anything in response to him being in your presence, and you don’t have to act or put on a front of not caring is awesome! and also I indicative of how far you have come in processing your time with him.
            Your experience was so much more involved and difficult then mine, so there is no comparator there lovely lady.. you should be so incredibly proud of you! Because you did this for you, you processed an experience that was defining and shattering, to get you to a place you want to Be and need to be…
            To Walk on by!

            You definitely have an edge, not only with your knowing but also with your ability to feel the difference!

            Your comment made me smile for many reasons.. I am here anyway who cares, so you can comment to me as much as you would like to do so. I very much enjoy our conversations especially ones where your kicking ass!

            My intent was to comment less reflectively as I was holding onto him with every reflection, I was thinking of him.
            But in my at times contrary manner some recent articles and the poll have evoked this in me anyway. So there that is … lol

            Keep kicking proverbial ass Who cares – you are worth every kick!
            And I’m here to holler- whoop whoop!!!
            Qxx

  12. Lori says:

    I’m curious is this why he would reibstate yet another fb profile in his real name with an actual photo of him yet not block me from this one yet I’m blocked from the others. I couldn’t believe it when I saw it. Did he do that so I would see a photo of him and that he could stay in my head?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Correct

      1. Windstorm says:

        Ok. One of you social media people out there. I’ve never really done FB. If someone blocks you, how would you ever know if he made up a fake profil or opened another FB account? Wouldn’t he have to try to friend you? Please pardon my nativité and ignorance.

      2. Supernova DE says:

        HG – A narc that prefers to communicate via social media rather than via SMS text, who slowly changes his profiles to fake names and generic photos, and no longer allows friend requests??…creeping on everyone from other fake profiles? Protecting façade? Thank you

      3. Lori says:

        Wow I’m getting the hang of this! Lol that is just wild! My first thought was omg he is trying to stay in my head ! Then I thought no this is for someone else. Then I went back to nope that is for me. He’s not ready to unblock me but he wants to make sure I don’t forget him. Too bad I blocked it

      4. Lori says:

        Supernova DE

        He prefers to communicate via social media likely because he’s gotta keep his supplies all straight. He knows he communicates with you via social media and maybe another supply via text that way he doesn’t get the two of you mixed up unless it’s a planned mix up whereby he sends you a text meant for someone else to provoke you

    2. SMH says:

      Ugh, Lori. I’ve blocked two fake profiles now. Never occurred to me that he would create a real one. Recently I have managed to avoid all of his real social media/networking where I know I will see a picture. Did you look for the real FB profile? Did it come up in your friend suggestions?

      1. SuperXena says:

        SMH!
        “ Recently I have managed to avoid all of his real social media/networking where I know I will see a picture“

        I knew you could! Sounds great! You are strong!
        Más abrazos.

        1. SMH says:

          Yeah, I finally blocked him, SuperXena. I am not tempted at all to look at his real social media, as I told you. But the fake profiles, well, they were hard for me not to visit, so I blocked! Thank you for insisting because I do feel better.

          1. SuperXena says:

            You are welcome SMH. Small steps big advancements.

      2. Lori says:

        I look periodically and there it was another profile with his real name only a more formal version. His pic everything. It wasn’t there a week ago I know it wasn’t. The fact that it popped right up tells me he was looking at my profile. A Facebook algorithm thing. There are many people with his name and I didn’t even put the formal version on for search and there it was. Anyone wanna bet he’s likely telling people he was hacked. Bs he was using it to try and stay in my head. He doesn’t want to talk to me. He just doesn’t want me to forget about him

        1. SMH says:

          Sounds like you figured it out, Lori. I don’t think mine would dare to make a real profile even for a day because IPPS and offspring etc are all on FB. They already make him use Instagram, which he does maybe once a month, never responds to anyone, has few followers etc. He’s not big into social media except for creeping!

      3. Lori says:

        His family is too it this is a profile from years ago. He’s probably teliing them that account was somehow hacked. Oh it was hacked alright only we call it reinstatement. He did that cause he knew that’s the only way he could get in front of me without unblocking me. Like I said he’s not interested in talking to me right now but wants to make sure I don’t forget him

        1. SMH says:

          But how would he know that he would show up in your friends suggestions? Do you have friends in common? Just curious because all of my friend suggestions are friends of friends (thank god because I have creeped IPPS profile – no friends in common – as well as narc fake profiles etc and would hate to show up in their suggested friends! LOL!)

      4. Lori says:

        Smh

        Oh Mr Lesser has 5 I know of but now that I have no contact he has no way to stay in front of me. Oh he could unblock me but he’s not ready for that but he is onviously wanting to make sure I don’t forget him. He knew I’d look just like I know he looks. It’s all a stupid game. You just want to scream stop all of this childish bs and be normal !!!! But he can’t

        He wanted a reason for me to see a picture

        1. SMH says:

          Lori, yes, I understand about the game and just wanting it to stop. I’m like, why don’t you just contact me normally instead of creeping??!! But mine wants me to contact him, which I won’t do.

      5. Lori says:

        Smh

        They are so freaking weird. At this point, I’m just like it is what it is. He is a narc that has to compulsively do this crap. He just wants me to contact him so he can ignore me. I have literally observed him blocking and unblocking me from his phone within hours

        I kinda wish I hadn’t blocked it because he knows now I saw it but it had to be done.

        1. SMH says:

          Yes, I know what you mean, Lori. I thought that when I blocked too – well, there is a reaction, he’ll say to himself all smugly. Just keep on with NC.

      6. Lori says:

        Believe me they totally know the power of photos. They are tools of manipulation. When you wanted to see pics they toook then away when you finally stop engaging with them they put them in front of you

        1. SMH says:

          Lori, Mine doesn’t have any pics on his fake profiles – not of him and not of anyone else. Only names and locations – just enough info for me to know. He likes to see pics of me but he doesn’t want me to have any of him (IPSS). He knows I could take a screen shot because I have done that before on another platform.

        2. windstorm says:

          Lori
          You reminded me of my Moron. He was always talking about his car. He’d tell me all about it, but would never send me a pic no matter how many times I asked. He made up every excuse under the sun of why he was unable to snap a pic of the car with his phone n text it to me. This went on for months (he was in Germany, me in The US). I thought maybe he’d made up having a nice car and really had a junker, but he could have snapped a pic off the street of a car like he claimed to have. He sent me 100’s of pics, but never the car.

          I spent a lot of time thinking about this and finally concluded he was refusing this simple request to try assert a control over me and try to teach me to submit to him. After I stopped laughing at the idea of him “training” me, I made that my litmus test for the relationship. No car pic, no more him. Any time I missed talking to him, I just thought about that car pic.

      7. Lori says:

        Windstorm,

        They withhold to control. Once they know you want something, they make sure you never get it. The only way you get it is is they know it will secure them a truck load of fuel.

        Smh

        None of his fake profiles had real pics either but guess what? They are not stupid they know that out of sight out of mind applies to them too because I can tell you I have been much better since I don’t see him and he’s lost his ability to taunt me.

        I was completely shocked when I saw that profile and then I thought why am so shocked? This guy was completely ate up and smitten with me. I got him to do things way out of his comfort zone. I’m ipss and I was Candidate ipss. he sent pics videos etc that I’m sure he wouldn’t want me to share of course he’s gonna keep tabs on me for no other reason that this guy put some effort in.

        1. SMH says:

          LOL, Lori. Not another Canadian? Or are you the Canadian? My MR is Canadian. I also have pics but I wouldn’t ever share them. He never communicated by social media. He only stalks by social media. I was also shocked, though this is the third platform he has used. I don’t think he does it because he is smitten (can a narc be smitten with someone other than himself?). I think he does it because I escaped and he is trying to get me to break NC so he can hoover me back and then discard me. Did you escape or were you discarded?

      8. Lori says:

        I gotta say I love reading y’all’s responses and comments and experiences. It’s been so helpful to put some missing pieces together. Every now and then someone will share elements of their story and their perspective as to why so certain behavior occurred and illl have an ahaha momemt when I think oh my gosh that’s why he did that!

        1. HG Tudor says:

          The contributions of readers do indeed add to the strength of this place.

          1. SMH says:

            Are we not empaths? We are devo! And we whip it good!

      9. Lori says:

        Yes HG, The readers are very helpful. I realize you are super Narc lol, but you are still human and there is only so many questions one human can answer so often I will look for answers in other people/ comments on their experiences. One might ask why do I need an answer if I accept that he’s an incurable narc? Well, I think we as humans have an innate need to understand even if it is something awful and doesn’t change an outcome. We still have a deep need to know.

    3. Lori says:

      Smh I searched his name and boom it popped right up. It would have eventually made a friend suggestion especially if he was looking at my profile. It won’t now cause its blocked lol. That’s too bad now he’ll have to open yet another one to spy with. Sucks for him

      1. SMH says:

        Ah, OK. Good for you being proactive! Mine will also have to open another one (unless I missed one, or two, or three, or four). I was just explaining all of this to a friend today. It is so twisted…

  13. Ivanka says:

    This was absolutely said. Multiple times and unfortunately, it is correct.

  14. HG Tudors #1 fan says:

    Why?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Because of everpresence, your susceptibility and our need for control.

      1. HG Tudors #1 fan says:

        This has been a battle I can not seen to win with a low cognative functioning Lesser Somatic. I learned a lot with your help, HG. I went over a year of no physical or verbal contact with the exception of social media stalking. My mistake was leaving one app open. The app was the gate way to a hoover. I should have listened to you. my life is being wasted away by this parasite.

      2. HG Tudors #1 fan says:

        The Lesser said, I have everything under control except your crazy ass. You know your stuff, HG.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Fucking A I do!

      3. Caroline says:

        So I’ll take that as a “no” then about a cure for Narc-Mother Tourette’s?

  15. Spiritual Warrior says:

    HG why are you here on Earth? Do you think of your self serving evil then good? Or you do not really thing of those things, you just need fuel. Do YOU THINK THAT Evil has entered your physical body and using you to hurt human beings. Do you think you are being used to show us that evil is real? Do you think you are an addict? of using Humans then drugs? DO YOU THINK YOU ARE BEING USED AS A FORCE OF EVIL OR YOU HAVE UNCONDITIONALLY CHOOSE THIS LIFE IN A HUMAN-BEING. Why I am asking these questions is DO you think you are being used to show us evil exsite, OR you were full on born this way? HOW DO WE GET YOU ON TED X TALKS? IF NOT MAYBE YOU HAVE HEARD OF Esther Hicks of Abraham ( look her up on youtube. She talks to spirits of Abraham) HERE is a very good Youtube I found of you…for Fuel…YES first thing in the morning you think Who can I fuck with today to get fuel 🙂 I am a mind of fitting the pieces to the puzzle. There is always an answer, of the WHY, we may not know it at the time or it comes later to someone else, BUT questions are always answered.

    How do I get my ex narc to die and go back where he came from as he is a serial women abuser for over 20 years. I wish you can look him up and see WHAT I mean. Here is the video that is good from you of fuel

    Be Well Mr. Tudor S.W.

    Knowing the Narcissist
    Published on May 20, 2016

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_mhaV9rk77k&list=PLi3qDwXAynOXoEl7LEMGwZILQkFgf2BzP

    1. HG Tudors #1 fan says:

      I just watch this video. I love the weary music in the back ground.

      I was trying to find the part where HG states.

      “You will always be in love with the person you thought that I was”.

    2. elainie says:

      Ha, I was married to a somatic narc and he sure did get his karma, he died a painful death from prostate cancer exactly where he liked to be Effed up the ass. I wish the recent elite greater narc gets his karma too and quickly. Those coal black eyes with that stare, I feel like I have been raped by satan and beyond, I knew what and whose lair I was entering into but it was oh so tempting.

  16. E&L says:

    Chilling daggers pierce the psyche and corrupt one’s sanity.

  17. MB says:

    The memes are back!

Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Next article

Horns and Halos