30 Shards of Ice

 

iced-heart

Words are our weapons. Easy to use, low in energy expenditure but with such potential. The capacity to charm, to flatter, to instil joy, to create desire, love and passion, to engender affection and much more besides. Words can be used to soothe, to convince, to persuade and to calm. Those words can also hurt, upset, annoy and frustrate. Cutting comments, acidic accusations and pernicious put-downs. The greater of our kind show particular ingenuity in assembling those savage sentences which cause despair and generate misery for the recipient. We adopt a considered approach in respect of the uttering of these barbed comments.

  1. They will be reserved most often for strangers and minions in order to reinforce our superiority and to show off in front of you, our primary source. We have no façade to maintain with the newspaper vendor, the waitress or the driver of another car. They will suffer the caustic words to allow the provision of fuel to us by their shocked and upset reaction and also from you by reason of your admiration at our masterful handling of the incompetent person serving us.
  2. Those who form the façade rarely receive the lash of our tongue unless they deceive us and become treacherous. For the most part those people will only ever experience the pouring of honey in their ears and the sugar-coated pleasantries which are designed to keep the loyal to us and to maintain the façade to our benefit.
  3. The worst of these comments is directed at you as our primary source of fuel. The issuing of nasty, malevolent and hurtful comments will be saved for you during devaluation for the purposes of causing the maximum provision of fuel and the assertion of our control. Slurs about your life, your appearance, your family, your interests, your job and your friends will be routinely hurled at you. This will happen repeatedly, like a machine gun firing our bilious bullets towards you. We also like to wield a show stopper of a comment, a particularly chilling comment which is designed to drive a shard of ice through your heart. The type of comment which leaves you in a stunned silence at the malice it contains. The nature of the comment leaves you horrified that somebody would say that to you, somebody who is meant to love and cherish you, somebody who once said the most wonderful things to you (and will do so again in about a week as the rollercoaster ride gets into its stride). These comments are designed to deliver maximum hurt, total upset and have that negative fuel pouring from you. They may leave you stunned, sickened, frightened and anxious, they will chill you to the core but our kind will always deliver them because words are our weapons. Here are thirty icy shards which are driven through your hearts.
  1. I will always be in your head and your heart. You will never ever escape me.
  2. I will not stop. Ever.
  3. You know, I thought about your funeral before and it troubled me. It troubled me because I would no longer be able to punish you.
  4. Nobody likes you, that is why your dad left you, you know. Nobody else will say it but I will.
  5. I hope it takes years of therapy to sort you out.
  6. You think this is bad? This is nothing. I am just getting started.
  7. I always know where you are.
  8. You are my puppet and I will never cut the strings.
  9. I know everything about you. Remember that.
  10. It’s strange what can happen when you are asleep.
  11. No matter how far you go I will always find you, because I own you.
  12. I only chose you because I felt sorry for you.
  13. You have no idea what is going through my mind right now have you? But I know exactly what you are thinking.
  14. Go on scream, nobody is listening.
  15. You are not a person to me.
  16. I’ve caressed you. Now I am going to crush you.
  17. Just think, you have already had the happiest moment in your life.
  18. You have told me all your secrets. Remember that.
  19. I’m diseased and I’ve infected every part of you.
  20. Nobody will ever believe what you say.
  21. I’m the permanent reminder of all the things you want to forget.
  22. I will teach our children to hate you.
  23. I’m going to show you what loneliness really is.
  24. This is happening because you are a bad person.
  25. I need to cleanse you and I will not stop until it is done.
  26. When you close your eyes you will only ever see my face.
  27. I will never let you go.
  28. I will never put you out of your misery.
  29. I hate her because she reminds me too much of you.
  30. This is what will happen for the rest of your life.

There are many more, but what have you been told which has stopped you in your tracks and sent a chill through you?

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18 thoughts on “30 Shards of Ice”

  1. “You’ve Been Ruining My Fucking Life Ever Since I Met You.. Hate To See Me Happy With Someone Else Other Than You When You Are Miserable.. The Only Reason You’re Contacting Those Females Is To Ensure That I Am Not Happy Whatsoever.. Guess What.. That’s Not My Baby!! So Go Ahead And Lie On Me.. It’s Not That You Havent Been Doing It Stopping Me From Going On A Deployment.. Stopping Me From Going To Massachusetts.. Stopping Me From Doing Anything That Has Nothing To Do With You.. You Are A Spiteful Vindictive Female Who Thinks She’s Smart To The Point Where Your Actions Are Mean Nothing.. Do Whatever You Gotta Do Rebekah.. Nothing Surprises Me About You Anymore.. Nothing.. It’s Pretty Pathetic At This Point.. You Have No Idea How To Move On.. I’ve Told You That We Will Never Have Anything, Yet You Don’t Want To Move On.. But When I Do, You Move In And Contact The Females I’m Talking To.. Who Are You To Do That????? No Fucking Body.. Not God, Not My Girlfriend.. Jus My Baby Momma.. So Go Ahead.. Be The Wretched Female That You Are At Heart And Reach Out To All Those Females Because When It’s All Said And Done, You’re Still Not Gonna Have Me.. Call Every Female That I’ve Ever Known, But You Better Not EVER CALL ANYONE IN MY FAMILY AGAIN!!! Now Get Off My Line..”

    A text message I will never forget..

    1. Bekah,how horrible for you! He mentions he is not the father and then later on states that all you are is his Baby Momma! How deplorable and typical!

      1. Yes, foolme1time.. Very deplorable and typical.. He sent this to me when I first told him I am pregnant with our unborn son in October of last year and threatened to tell all of his sources.. It’s astonishing what words of malice will come from the narcissist when their facade is threatened.. Nonetheless, I took this as the truth and will never let it go..

    2. Bekah B
      Sorry, that was really awful. He reminds me of my ULN. The next time he comes to Massachusetts, I will have The Jackal take him out.

      1. Hey K,

        Yeah, it was pretty bad and I was very stunned after receiving that last year.. However, the passage of time and gradual acceptance has numbed its initial effect on my emotions.. When I read it now, I conclude the underlying message is he really doesn’t like me, will say anything to point the finger and blame me for his own shortcomings, and he feels that he himself is a nobody, therefore he must project that onto me in order to assert his superiority..

        I’ll never forget this message and it is somewhat of my motivation to continue to stay far, far away and never again become emotionally available to him..

        Oh no.. Not The Jackal.. LOL!

        1. Bekah B
          Even though the text message wasn’t directed at me, I was stupefied by it. Stay far, far away from him and his family! You and your children deserve better. A malign hoover is the last thing a pregnant mother needs!

          Ha ha ha…The Jackal is my metaphorical “Hit Man”. It is one of my coping mechanisms.

          1. Oh yes, definitely.. I’ve had to act against my usual self and not acknowledge his family members as I have in the past on their birthdays and certain holidays, but I know it is to my ultimate benefit.. I do not want to be hoovered malignantly.. I’m too close to the end of my pregnancy and have soooo much to look forward to.. I’m not looking backward..

            I figured The Jackal was in reference to a hitman.. I may watch that movie this weekend! I just watched the remake of Death Wish this past weekend, so I’m still in Bruce Willis mode.. Lol..

          2. Bekah B
            It’s very difficult, but I am happy that you are looking forward. It is for the best but it still sucks.

            I just watched that remake a couple of weeks ago and I think you will enjoy The Jackal very much. Die Hard with Alan Rickman and BW is another good one, if you haven’t seen it yet.

  2. ‘You are making me break up with you on your birthday. Your crying is pathetic. I am hanging up.’ (milestone birthday, over the phone on the other side of the world knowing that our baby was breastfeeding at the time, following a silent treatment of over 3 weeks (i.e discard) and me calling to ask why he ignored me and his son (planned pregnancy, conception test).

    1. Rebecca, I’m sorry you were treated so poorly, especially on your birthday with your baby. I don’t know you but I know you deserve so much better than that. I hope you can consider his absence a blessing, though I know that’s not easy to do. Put all your love and energy into your child. Instill good self esteem and values into him or her. The narc won’t be able to because he’s too wrapped up in himself. You rock.

    2. Rebecca I am so sorry you and your have been treated so horribly! My heart goes out to you and your precious child. It might not seem like it now but the two of you are so much better without that piece of garbage in your life! Take care of that baby, take care of yourself.

  3. “Don’t bother calling the cops. I’ll be calm by the time they get here.”

    That was my baby daddy who I haven’t yet consulted with you about yet ,re narc or not. Regardless quite the narc-y statement and I’ll never forget it . Was a watershed moment.

  4. My mom who was also my best friend, passed away after a protracted battle with ALS (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis). The narcissist knew this. I was so decimated by this loss I couldn’t function. As it happened I didn’t take his calls or texts maybe once or twice. The next time I reached out to him he asked,” how’s your mum doing” I think my heart stopped beating for a second.

  5. I have heard #14 in a song called “kim” by eminem I haven’t heard any of them i think i have been treated like some of these statements but never uttered to me thanks for the piece hg i feel like the paragraph you wrote before the 30 shards is what I’m more used to the way you worded it was more like the narc that was in my life

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