A Letter to the Narcissist – No. 30
Hello my old friend
No need to kneel or strip, the hurt will be of a different kind today. Are you excited? I know Im looking forward to it.
I would ask how you’ve been but then I would have to endure one of your vapid monologues on how important you are and exhausted at having the world upon you. God you really are a bore. I thought I would never be able to retrieve my eyeballs from up in my skull after another one of your diatribes. You do know that the people who smile, listen, and kiss your ass like you do mine, do so to get what they want and are paid to do so? Well you have nothing of worth to offer me so I am under no such obligation. I told you what you wanted to hear and there was not much truth to any of it, just as you did to me.
Of course Im not being fair. You could choose to start talking about your second favourite subject-your balls. Your fascination with them is mind numbing. They are really but two saggy sacks of expired seed that could not produce a boy and are of no use to anyone. The seed is trapped there for all eternity due to your inability to produce the life altering hard-ons I was promised in the beginning and that you knew you could never deliver. Not that I was really interested. I wanted to excavate your mind, only to be disappointed by the vacuous hole that matches the one where your soul should be. Oh, and the pictures of the injuries to them that you sent me? We both know that is not my work but please do give my compliments to whomever caused them.
It was wonderful in the beginning wasn’t it? I confirmed you were every bit as handsome, intelligent, and god-like as you believe yourself to be. I loved filling you up with the power that allowed you to do the difficult things you must do to keep up the facade because it benefitted others, and kept those who coveted your position at bay. I warned you though not to get nasty-to get that from the others. It was so amusing and completely unnecessary when you swore on your pathetic existence that there were no others. I never cared.
Who knew that when you inevitably did, that I would have armed myself by slogging through all those pages of an ancient Inquiry to find those kernels of shame you thought long buried. It must have stung like that one disparaging remark about your physicality (hand to throat in mock horror) made in a book citing your accolades. How I laughed inside while you struggled to compose yourself and demand to know how I knew these things. You cant say I didn’t warn you.
Oh, and I’ll continue to decline your offer to meet and “leave my brand” on you. We both know thats a trap I wont be falling into as I am not “The One” as you called me, but the treacherous bitch that I really am. But you’ll keep trying-your sickness demands it.
N.A
14 thoughts on “A Letter to the Narcissist – No. 30”
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So true! You nailed it!
NA
I cannot believe I am going to write this, not because of you as much as so many others will read it! 🤦🏼♀️ The narcissist prior to the last one, ( that sounds horrible ha ha) was the one that brought out this side of me I never knew existed, even though he wasn’t what he he claimed to be in bed, ( they usually aren’t) being dominant and in control was something that I enjoyed very very much! I have no clue as to why that was, it actually went against being that submissive person I always thought myself to be. To be honest with you, after we were know longer together it was the only thing I truly missed, and to this day I still do! 😉🙃
You go Empaths! Awesome and but so true!
Haha NA, I didn’t know you had a ex N. I only knew about StepNarc. I can imagine this guy was like “WTF happened” after you got through with him.
That’s my NA! Total badass till the end!! Your f—king Awesome!! 👏👏👏🙃
Powerful and kickass. His poor ballz lmao
Ouch This is worse than hatred this is cold nothing must’ve done a number on her
I really like the second paragraph.
The first paragraph reminds me of when I’m seething.
The second paragraph reminds me of how boring and delusional narcissists can be. How to take something given and turn it into something owed. And also how we willingly play a part in the facade.
Loving all these badass letters! Makes me ashamed of my own sad, whiny, sniveling submission 😢 But that was then and this is now! Keep these coming! 👊🏼
It will come Joanne. The No Contact will help and then you’ll have some time to yourself to get really angry. Then that Super Empath will ROAR!
Thanks TH!
I am feeling the roar rumbling! NC feels really good. Freedom. Just these past few days there have been “reasons” to stalk out his social media – things that have happened in his area that I am SURE he would have some commentary on. Not only did I resist doing this, but I actually FORGOT to do it on those days, which I feel is even better. Little steps!
That is even better!!!! Lately I’ve forgotten their names at times! I finally found the delete button in my brain🤣
TH
Yeah!! 👊🏼 I don’t think I’ll forget his name any time soon but since it is such a common name, it’s also a nice feeling to not have my anxiety heightened anymore when I hear it mentioned several times a day!
Yes it will