Revenge
You will never secure revenge over a narcissist unless you understand how the narcissist thinks and behaves.
You will never secure revenge over a narcissist when you are blinded by emotional thinking.
When victims believe they have obtained revenge, they will invariably have fallen onto The Devil´s Pitchfork and failed. Avoid that fate, by reading the work of the expert.
Revenge is a dish best served by HG Tudor.
It is still early for revenge campaign in my situation.
It is good that you recognise that to be the case.
Umm, speaking of revenge, that wasn’t your 18k gold toilet that someone just stole from a palace in the UK was it? Idk, a little gaudy more than godly, but a golden throne nonetheless.
HG if we decide after reading this book we are ready to embark on a revenge campaign is it wise to consult with you first about it as well? So we can tailor it specific to the situation?
Absolutely. HG approves.
Noted. Once I drop my last sphere of influence I think I’m ready for this. And I’m assuming I can do it without breaking no contact?
You will breach it in terms of thinking about the narcissist and taking action with regard to the narcissist and this will cause an increase in emotional thinking and therefore should only ever be done once emotional thinking has been reduced to a very low level indeed, so as to create a buffer zone to cater for this increase in emotional thinking.
My personal recommendation would be – go total no contact for a year. You’d be surprised how quickly the desire for revenge fades with the ET. In support groups for addictions they strongly recommend waiting a full year after quitting before having a relationship, (making big sweeping decisions, etc) because after a year one has really steadied out in the addictive thinking department (if they’ve done inner work) and the perspective on many things & people has altered to a more stable one.
I’m 9 months into total NC with a narc and it’s so peaceful that delving into all the trouble it would take to unhinge his narcissistic pillars is too much trouble and not appealing- in fact just giving him any of my attention in that fashion would feel like giving him control back.
His life IS revenge enough. Removing myself without warning and staying GOSO is fully satisfactory .in fact I have a lot of respect for myself for NOT chasing after revenge. I did what my best self would do. It’s rewarding.
Maybe give it some time .
This is a sound observation. One must of course ensure that it is total no contact however, far too many people believe they are in no contact when they are not.
Oh I’ve Been no contact over a year 🤣 we still work for the same company though so there are too many gateways open and I finally understand I can’t propwrly heal til I leave. So that it what I’m working on right now is getting myself out.
HG you have the resources & means to carry out a thoroughly delightful revenge. I think you should have an Empath Revenge business. Most of ya would pay good $ to have you do it . Just fuck the narcs life right up. Worth a grand, easy.
HG—sometimes toppling someone professionally is easy. When it’s not are you adept in this type of endeavor? Well of course you’ll say yes—but can you really make an empath effective? Is this very individualized?
It is all about the reduction of emotional thinking, without doing this, any revenge campaign will fail.
It’s interesting because when someone needs dealt with it would seem at times the action must be swift and therefore a reduction in ET may not coincide with the required actions. It’s not generally even about revenge but self protection. Women can be very jealous. (The narcissist types I suppose to the highest extent) and they can do substantial damage. I don’t have the jealousy trait in a quantity that allows me to identify with it at all. I suppose getting to the point where ET is always low is the best goal so that logic can be swiftly applied?..
Correct. Self-protection means no contact, that does not involve revenge.
Hm. Perhaps the fact I still think about him everyday makes me not ready for This venture 🤔
Correct.