The Narcissist and Covid-19
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– What the virus means to your no contact regime
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Holy shit! This is a big thread!
HG. Question.
Where EXACTLY in your opinion do you think the British Executive Health & Saftety at Work are? Precisely.
Some of the more eagle eyed amongst you might see I’ve changed my avatar.
This is my earliest memory. 18 months. I was on a ‘pitch and put’ golf course. I remember it like yesterday.
I saw all these RED FLAGS and for some reason, I desperately wanted to pull them out of the holes.
I was running faster than Dominic Cummings after learning his boss had CV19. Or possibly realising that Jimmy Savile was on my tail.
L@@K at the sheer determination when I’m trying to pull 17 out of its moorings. Marvel! Also clock me hair. I was born a clink.
I got up to many shenanigans on that holiday. I have literally not stopped getting up to shenanigans. I attract trouble, always have. I’m sure when I ring my friends they groan and go, ‘Oh God, what has she been up to now?’
So if this picture isnt a testament to what is now my lifes work, I dont know what is.
Renarde – it is a cute photo. I can see how the troublemaker streak runs true.
“I was born a clink.”
Sorry but what does this mean?
WC
This is true. It’s like I’ve a got a devil on my shoulder who whispers ‘moments of hilarity’
Some of my greatest and finest work was achieved at University. First one. Each time, I deliberately knew what I was doing. What was strange is that I’d often have the idea, no one would attempt to stop me and then would join in.
I did almost get caught out once. Whilst what I was doing could’ve had me kicked out (in fact many things could have), it was an error on my part.
I didnt lock my halls door. And I’m saying no more.
Now I’m pleased to say that I reserve the troublemaker for narcs. I still have my moments though.
But not on that scale. Months before Covid, I was in Tescos. The manager was doing that OCD thing with perfectly aligned labels etc. Every time I tried to reach for something, he blocked me. This went on several times.
Right. When his back was turned I deliberately shifted quite a few of the boxes on their axis.
Petty I know but his zero awareness a loyal customer was trying to get in and out irked me.
Born a clink means born red. So was my younger bro. He stayed, I was dark by 3. He was bullied for that by his school pals.
Interestingly, I know so many Doms who want a natural red head. Usually little. And curvy.
“Born a clink means born red. So was my younger bro. He stayed, I was dark by 3.”
Right, thanks. Me too, only I was dark and turned light.
“Interestingly, I know so many Doms who want a natural red head. Usually little. And curvy.”
I’m not sure where to file that, but interesting to note.
Whocares—I ended up at a bondage event thing at a night club once and people were really nice. There seemed a genuine camaraderie. It doesn’t bother me but I didn’t feel quite comfortable. I worked with a guy once who made sex equipment and it’s very high priced. Swings and the like..He told me he was a narcissist as was his wife. She had abandoned her son and he said no good woman does that. It was weird. He was aware indeed but on the level of lacking true awareness HG discusses. He was a wimp under it all because I cared for him medically once. To be honest, he was always great to me. I’d still love to see him. I’m rambling on a bit memory of a long ago person.. He also wore kilts to bars. Unusual guy but interesting.
Lorelei,
Yes, your past co-worker does sound a bit peculiar…all but the part of wearing kilts to bars.
WC
File it under ‘pretentious fucking wankers’ x
Renarde,
Got it..haha. Done, then!
WC
Nice one x
Ren
Nice pic!
Thank you WC X
Awww, widdle cuteness….
There may be some sort of mischief gene associated with red hair. A friend told me about her dorm-mate in college. She was a happy drunk, as opposed to a mean one, but in her case, that meant she was caught whizzing along the hall at 2am wearing roller skates and nothing else, blithely shrieking, “WHEEEEEE!!!”
Apparently she’d always been that enthusiastic. When her mother gave her the human reproduction talk, then opened it up for questions, the girl promptly asked, “Is it fun?”
Red heads feel pain differently. They need 19% more anaesthetic compared to non- redheads
HG,
“Red heads feel pain differently. They need 19% more anaesthetic compared to non- redheads”
You have stated this before elsewhere. I don’t quite agree with it.
I am fairly stoic when it comes to physical pain. (Can provide several examples as a child or as adult.)
The thing I can personally says supports this is the most recent trip to the dentist I have experienced. The locale anesthetic would not take, and the dentist said that (2-3 tries) was the most local that could be given. He would proceed with a topical on the tooth nerve (reapply and check in with me)…was not fun, I could feel everything and while the pain was muted, I had to let him know when it was getting more intense.
I do not recall having a similar experience as a child at the dentist (I didn’t know if it was me or this particular dentist was less capable than some) and I was born a natural “clink.”
Your comment actually agrees with what I have stated.
The one example I provided does agree with your statement.
But I have not noticed this phenomenon at any other time as an adult or child. Many other trips to the dentist as a child did not require more than the normal amount of anesthetic. And I would guess that I take pain meds way less than most (for headaches or what have you). If you were to state that redheads *tolerate* pain differently than I could agree with you. I am not sure that they *feel* pain differently though.
HG,
“Redheads feel pain differently.”
Sorry, a further question. This observation is based on statistics reported somewhere….or personal experience?
It was based on a scientific report.
Okay. Thanks HG.
No problem
So, I looked up some of the findings…(also a past boss of mine, who is a fellow ginger, have also had discussions on the topic – he does have significant pain at the dentist)…
From one article:
“In other words, redheads do feel more pain, but they also feel less pain — they just process pain differently.”
Mmmm. That’s conclusive.
WC, I am curious, I am not a red head, but with regard to local anesthetic, I am slow in response time for it it take effect and slow to emerge form the effects. I wonder if this has to do with how we metabolize topical pain killers? Obviously this is not true for general anesthetics. I also am told by doctors I have a higher than average pain threshold, but I doubt this as I seem on par to others in similar situations.
In other words, you may be slow to absorb the local, not that you need 3x the amount overall from the outset?
FYC – slow to absorb…that makes more sense to me. The dentist I had before this last one seemed more empathic and considerate. She was gentle and there was no issues with the local anesthetic.
WC, After a quick search on scientific study, HG is accurate (of course). Here is the study:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1362956/
As for local anesthetics, the agent binds to proteins and can vary by type of anesthetic agent.
Thank-you FYC! I actually really want to read it…seems far more interesting than 2nd grade 3D solids atm. 🙂
WC, haha that made me laugh. You are welcome and it is interesting. Once again I learn something new here every day…
Hg, I thought you were going to say that unlike red heads you opt out on anaesthetic altogether.
Shows how little you know of me.
Dear Vi
Now it’s my turn to laugh so loudly I think I’ve startled the neighbours dog.
That’s hysterical. Totally worthy of ‘Hi Jinks’ status. The writer in me is commending your usage of ‘blithely’.
Oh God. Sex must be fun or why bother? Girls got her head screwed on. Even if she was a bit wonky at times. But the best of us are!
Name and number please. Post haste. She needs to be recruited.
She was a college friend of a grad school friend, so I don’t even remember her name, just the story.
Hadn’t heard about dental sensitivity, but I had seen a study where they tested how close they could put a fiber to the eyes. People with light-colored eyes were very sensitive, while people with dark eyes were less so. Chinese eyes could have the fiber directly on them without blinking or feeling discomfort.
I noticed your new picture. Nice to have a story behind it.
Narc noon
Aww TY! Sometimes I cant quite fathom how time unfurls x
Go girl!
Grr Alexis! X
Oh my God.
I’ve just checked some of the randomners on messenger…and I may, I mean may have hit paydirt for the ASF. Western Union, here I come!
So hes actually composed of what I can only call a shrine? With lit candles, around a box of hard currency.
Now, has he done this before? Hmm.
I might engage with this one.
Lovely Sujul.
Your Beltane gift awaits. Cash first though. Please.
So, heres the thing.
Got another one. Let’s call him R.
Hes sent a video to me, unsolicited, of him having a quick one off the wrist.
In said vid, he comes. All over his stomach.
Why? Why does he think I’d even find it remotely attractive? . I’ve given some serious thought to this today and I think that his Fet is being observed. I think deep down, he knows hes not going to get a decent woman that way. He does not care.
He just wants to be witnessed. He wants a reaction. Positive or negative. He just wants fuel.
So yes performing the act and gaining thoght fuel.
I think I’ll call the group Renardes Renages.
I sent a cock pic to another man last night.For shits and giggles. Normal men would yell and scream at this. But unnormral men wont.
I think the problem with Empaths that we are largely scared. So naturally, we do not provoke.
I think that what Empaths do not understand is how far we can push narcs.. Believe me with the unare, it’s very far.
Every E on here needs to imagine themselves as a wall. Let them bounce against it. No. Reaction. GOSO AND NC will take you so far. But that’s The Beginning. HG knows this.
These are advanced techniques.
Hope this helps x
Renarde,
I have thought about this. Have you notice how many trolls there are on the internet right now? Not on here, but the internet in general? Random people are off of work, scared, pissed, triggered. They will say something shocking, offensive, purposely disagree to argue. Anything to still matter. So sad
Internet trolls are narcissists and misguided normals. The former have no emotional empathy and have a need for fuel. The latter have no emotional empathy (but no need for fuel) towards the faceless strangers they are dealing with online, but they would not behave in a similar way in person because that would occur with the application of emotional empathy.
Amn
Fine words. You’ve got this.
Yes. They are, Ns are rapidly running out of control . Vast majority do not understand control.
By this I mean two things. The unaware do not understand that they need to control others and equally, they do not understand other narcs who want to control them.
The unaware are the most spectacular miss judges of character. Ms will state up and down ., he or she is good. This can mistep an E.
Amn, they know fuck all. Because they do not understand Affective Empathy they will blind side you. Cannot count the amount of times the MME said, ‘But all my friends on FB are sound’
Urm no? Your Pa is a kiddy fiddler. Your best bud wants BJs for lifts? Oh the Lieutenant got himself into massive trouble. Police style.
Stay safe. Just keep educating yourself. Help others where you can.
I know this shit is hard but Enlightenment isnt given away for free.
Best of Britsh, lovely x
Some comic relief during quarantine.
(For relevance, most of these influencers see highly Narcissistic, if not full-out Narcs):
DM Headline: “Tik-SHOCK! Dancer’s video leaves him feeling ‘sick’… after social media users spot sinister figure lurking on stairs in the background while he’s home alone”
The consensus is the “mysterious figure” is a cat, which what it looks like to me. He claims he has no pets, but either somebody else’s wandered in, or he’s lying.
Now for the comments:
Jus1982, Glim, 13 hours ago
Whatever it was, his dancing scared it away.
Connect The Dotz, Woburn_England, 11 hours ago
Yeah, the dancing is the scariest part of the vid!
tidydj, Doncaster, United Kingdom, 12 hours ago
It’s his dignity leaving his body.
That is 100% a Ghost……. well it would be if your cat was called ‘Ghost’.
SIMULATION_0218, Sim, United Kingdom, 12 hours ago
I think everybody is more concerned because he thinks he can dance.
claudia.rowe, SYDNEY, Australia, 2 hours ago
Want to feel good about yourself? Meet a millennial.
Noideawhyireadthis, Nunya, United States, 14 hours ago
Clearly this person lives in their parents basement so it probably one of them wondering what their idiot child is up to.
peanutsontoast, Woodland, United Kingdom, 8 hours ago
‘Dancing’? I beg to differ.
imogen88, Cirencester, United Kingdom, 10 hours ago
Maybe next door coming to take his stereo away.
CharlesTango, London , United Kingdom, 13 hours ago
It’s the next door neighbour’s cat coming in to laugh at him.
And now, my personal favorite comment:
Cupidstunt69, Cork, Ireland, 9 hours ago
The poor burglar took one look at that sad crap dancer and gave up his life of crime.
*seem highly Narcissistic.
2nd favorite exchange (ironically, Dana usually posts troll Stan valentines to Meghan Markle):
Dana Ding, Wilmington, United States, 7 hours ago
THAT WAS A DEMON. YOU NEED TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN!!
Laurapora, Glasgow, United Kingdom, 7 hours ago
Whilst he is still inside
Vi
You gut sum serious shit going down, my sis
Whatcha need t’do is get hol of the 💚
I’ve been talkin to me main man. Boi. Hes talkin shit. I’m very disgusted.
He is sayin, I can give yer stuff and ting
How much, says I?
200 on the oz, days he
I say, man you is bonks, innit? Tho’.?
I dearly wish me old mucker Rodger was about town. Yardie. Decent tho’. He’d do me a good one.
Amateurs.
Respec!
Renarde:
Can I borrow your Burberry scarf and Vauxhall Corsa, innit?
Vi
You iz can borrow me cashmere wrap and me Nissan Micra.
And I wouldn’t say that to just N E 1.
X
P.S Me wrap is nearly 97% silk with a touch of cashmere. It’s 2 die for.
Please bring both back in 1 pieze. Innit
Cheers and tanks.
P.P.S Iz you indulge in nortiness with me cashmere, pleaze wash it first B4 returnin. Me Julie x
P.P.S Luvs U
Renarde: Laughing like hyena. If neighbors didn’t already think I was barking, this would do it.
Vi
I’m at this moment listening to my neighbours SCREAMING out to get their dog in. Jesus.
Very kind words missus. At this disparate times, surely the comedy must get us all energised?
Renarde:
Sorry, scarf got manky because West Staines Massiv.
Imma get you some One Million or Royal Oud instead, innit?
Vi
You iz kind and ting. But me Mirca, Jo,. Were iz it?
I iz not calling you out, bruh.
But I needz me Julie (Jo).
Keep me pashmina. I just needz me Jo.
Do I needz to call in the Fedz?
Orite ? You say you not callin me out, but you calls the Fedz, ima bang u out dick’ed.
Aiyah
I see yer crew RNT EXACTLY ere.
Do U rely wanna go down wiv thiz shit?
I az other biz 2 B takin care ov
Me main man Sujal is desperate to give meez $$$. I gizz he wants me to watch him wank and ting.
So I sez thiz. You ave the road on the Occy down to MicckyDs from town. I take the rest. Coz u is not avin da indian.
Let’s shake on it bruh. Man 2 man. U hav me word.
Ya startin mayte?
Renarde , I love your new picture! Beautiful
Aww! So kind Ashley x
For those who are not privy to the niceties of ChavSpeak:
(Actual Britons, please correct me where I am wrong on any of these details):
There seem to be two primary strains of pretension.
The first strain is people who pretend to be richer and more important than they are. Their props have historically included gold chains, Nikes or Pumas, and the ubiquitous Burberry beige plaid (and counterfeit versions).
The second strain is middle-class people pretending to be more street than they are. The gang rivalry Sacha Baron-Cohen describes in Da Ali G Show supposedly takes place in Stained, a thoroughly middle-class enclave.
The American equivalent would be the guy in the Offspring video for Pretty Fly (For a White Guy).”
Vi
I salute you.
And Pretty Fly off a white guy is bangin.
I always wanted to be one of the dancers in the vid. I could dance at that point but now I have the figure. So I matched!
I think I’m going to listen to it now!
Right now. And ting.
P.S Useless dealers are like the bell end of society? Dodge! Where are you?
Oh yeah I know. The Carribean.
*Staines @#$& autocorrect
Madam. You are comedy gold!
If we were to ever meet IRL, MASSIVE hijinks, shennagains and capers of all sorts would occur.
May I ask, how good on you on a quick moon?
Good I trust?
Baby Got Back, so not quick variety.
Indeed x
Actually, I know some people who got really fried at a Tolkien weekend, and wandered around the site at 5 in the morning singing “Baby Got Back” in Elvish.
Vi
Now you’ve seriously spluttered into the random.
During this lads A Levels. He lost it. Stood up and apparently tried to convince people his was a fruit! An orange apparently. Poir geezer!
Hang on. How can you actually get fried at a Tolkien weekend? How is that even possible?
They’re all neerds!
I just noticed you released this book already. I was waiting for it too. I think I confused the release date of your new youtube page with this date. Bought , downloaded, and reading it now! Yay!
There are two. There is the Narcissist and Covid-19 and then there is the soon to be released The Narcissist in Covid-19 Lockdown. They have different titles and different covers.
HG , Thatcher saying what she said re society , I’ve been thinking a lot about what exactly she meant , can you explain ?
Here is the full quote in context which explains it for you.
“I think we have gone through a period when too many children and people have been given to understand “I have a problem, it is the Government’s job to cope with it!” or “I have a problem, I will go and get a grant to cope with it!” “I am homeless, the Government must house me!” and so they are casting their problems on society and who is society? There is no such thing! There are individual men and women and there are families and no government can do anything except through people and people look to themselves first… There is no such thing as society. There is living tapestry of men and women and people and the beauty of that tapestry and the quality of our lives will depend upon how much each of us is prepared to take responsibility for ourselves and each of us prepared to turn round and help by our own efforts those who are unfortunate.”
It’s nice to think of the tapestry as so amazing until one is beaten down by narcissists—like herself.
I totally agree with her!!
Same here, MommyPino!
Well, many who lived under her reign did not agree with her.
I knew many who did not (was living there at the time, in the more hard hit parts of Britain), and they certainly were not whiners who thought everything should be given to them for nothing.
I really do not want to sound unpleasant towards you or MommyPino, it’s just that I do get heated up when I remember what I saw then.
Sorry if I sound abrupt, again, it is not directed at you, but that woman certainly makes my blood boil. Even now that she is six feet under.
I believe that there is, or there should be, such a thing as society.
Clearly she can still obtain fuel in death!
Indeed Lisk, and it’s really easy for an elite to say government can’t fix all the woes, etc. True somewhat, but the reality is that many people aren’t equipped to fix their own situation without a ton of support. Public health is reliant on an empathic government structure. Many mental health woes and familial strains are in direct correlation to narcissists and their toxicity.
Maggie was a bit before me, but she had impact. I went to a concert back in 2003 or 4, Roger Waters from old Pink Floyd. He turned his whole show into a big power point presentation about Margret Thatcher and how much he despised her doings. It felt odd. He did play his nice songs we all recognized. But with huge posters of Maggie behind him. It’s like he did not know that she had left government many years ago. He was obsessed.
/the guy I went with is a caring empath I much much regret I went away from.
Cat, I personally would have been offended if I paid to go to a concert to listen to music and I get lectured about politics. Especially nowadays when it costs a fortune to watch a concert. It is very selfish of the artist and actually really narcissistic.
Yes Mommypino He was as narcish as Thatcher but completely unaware of himself. I think the Roger Waters concert was in Oslo. Why still teach ppl in Oslo about an ex prime minister of Great Britain?
Ok so their music from the 80s and The Wall was very much about her. But still. Idk.
Narcs are weird.
I realize since knowing Narcsite, that back in the day I must have thought that Labour party ppl couln’t be manipulative…
Our convictions make us unable to spot narcs.
So true Cat!
It’s easy for anyone to say, because it’s the truth. Government cannot fix all woes. It does a bad job, plus it’s not government’s responsibility.
As for “empathic government structure”—that actually sounds scary.
“ As for “empathic government structure”—that actually sounds scary.”
It does.
Hello fiddleress,
Thank you for your honesty and I didn’t feel that you were abrupt. Most of us feel strongly about our political leanings and how certain politicians have affected our lives. I respect your own experiences from her leadership and your point of view. I have never been in England and I am not familiar with the political and societal structures there. If you quiz me regarding the things that Margaret Thatcher has done, I would fail miserably. All that I know is that she is known for being the Iron Lady and she was an incredibly brilliant and strong woman based on what I have read about her which is not a lot.
Separated from who she was or what she did, I personally agree with what she said. The government and society is really nothing if not for the people paying taxes to keep it going or doing charity work to help those who are unable to help themselves. That is the tapestry that I believe she was talking about. I had a friend here who told me something like we have to strengthen ourselves first so we can help others. She gave the example of if the plane is crashing put your oxygen first before putting the oxygen on your loved ones or other people. If people are thriving, the government and society will thrive and these people will be able to help others who are unfortunate so that they can be empowered too. She has said to take responsibility for ourselves so we can turn and help those who are unfortunate. My personal beliefs agree with the quote. I don’t think that people should be forced to do charity work by the government through unreasonable taxation. I believe that people would help more if they feel personal satisfaction from doing it because they are not being forced to. I believe that the government should allow people freedom to reach their highest potential and only act as support. But I also believe that the government should also intervene in certain situations such as regulating the prices of necessities etc. I don’t believe in absolutes.
I do not.
Thanks HG!
I’m not getting this reference. Is this quote in the book?
Lisk, that was on the Quiz..quotes of narcissists. MT was the one who said society doesn’t exist. She was a greater. HG gave us the whole quote as WokeAF asked for it.
I see. I’m jumping all over this thread now to understand the quote’s context!
Thank you, Nn!
So, I’ve just been listening to Sky and a bit of a car crash interview between Jeremy Hunt (Chair of some Health committee) and the Health Secretary, Matt Hancock.
His lack of even cognitive empathy is unravelling and fast. Saying he ‘wishes he could just magic aprons out of the air’.
I mean, REALLY? RE£ALLY?
The HSE is very clear, every single hazard in the workplace MUST be mitigated by putting in external procedures. But the most common one is of course PPE. For him to just throw is hands in the air and go, ‘If only I could’ is simply not acceptable. You would not ask a welder not to use a helmet, people working with nuclear radiation not to carry a film badge. Why is this any different?
Moreover, the tooling required for making these gowns HAS to be minimal. I do not understand why our own production facilities haven’t been approached. (I used to be a production engineer). Even as I’m typing this, I’m seeing that Louis Vuitton are making masks.
Hancock is loosing it. He had a pop at a journalist yesterday discussing scientific advisors. And he was also the guy who issues a warning to the NHS NOT to waste PPE. Utterly disgraceful.
And actually, the HSE have gone AWFULLY quiet, haven’t they?
One of the things I HATE is knowledge. It ROYALLY sucks when you know something and you can not do a thing with that knowledge except stew on it. I know of a “Tool” that can solve this problem with great efficiency but I am not allowed near it. The “Tool” has a very nice blue laser, with sequential targeting capabilities and is lightning fast and DEADLY accurate. The nice part is whatever is hit by it (the laser) is instantly turned to a pile of carbon. If in my control I would simply give it the parameters to target anything walking with a mask on first! It’s the most humane way (if that is of concern) to take care of the problem, no waste of ground space trying to back fill over the bodies. Think Paradise CA. but much neater, that was a sloppy job!
You don’t have a tool, you are a TOOL and I’m glad I don’t have your personality disorder.
Lorelei:
Succinctly phrased.
Christian
Sounds like you’ve got it all covered.
I’m sorry society looks askance at those who love Mommy ‘a little too much’.
My deepest condolences.
Renarde—you are funny. I’m being evaluated for red flags by someone right now and it’s hilarious because I can’t say, “I’m not a narcissistic sociopath” because that’s weird!
Lorelei
That’s hysterical! Even if you could say it without it sounding odd they would REALLY think you were! 🤣🤣🤣
Renarde—I was drilled with questions. Good ones. I passed. I learned from HG how to hide it. Seriously though—I was impressed. I passed.
Lorelei
You been he gave you a verbal NDC?
Wow!
Yes Renarde. I’ve been drilled and got it again tonight. 100 questions. Worse than an interview. I know how to disguise my dysfunction though and not look like a nut job. Thankfully I have not detected any narcissism, in fact, a detector won’t be needed. I’m positive. Stats: has MBA, cute, 11 years older, successful market researcher, has a lake front cottage, discusses research with enthusiasm, and I’ve not been asked for a dick pic. I’m passing my interviews and haven’t been hit up for sex. I’m actually glad to be under the radar. I was grateful for intelligent discussion. Oh, has a dog that doesn’t appear timid from being yelled at!
Lorelei,
I don’t see how “successful market researcher” is
NOT a red flag!
Also, a note about NOT being hit up for sex: Super-cerebral Narcx withheld any real physical contact from me for 2 months (not even a kiss until 1.5 months into it) even though I was definitely desiring it. This “I’m not ready due to too many short-term relationships where I get pulled in and dumped soon after we have sex” story, of course, made him seem like a “nice guy,” and a victim to be treated kindly.
However; I’m sure he also was withholding for a number of real reasons, one of which was to control me, the other was so he could say to a possible IPPS (unbeknownst to me at the time) that he was only out for dinner with “just a colleague.”
I thought the non-physical thing was weird at the time. A friend of mine did, too, and warned me to dump him early on. I didn’t heed her warning and got sucked into 7 years of bad luck without even having to break a mirror.
I asked HG about this Lorelei because I had that a few times. HG concurred when I asked if this was more likely to be a mid who believes he’s a greater.
Thanks Alexis—but why would a mid be so stupid and foul? It’s childish.
To ask questions to see if you’re a psycho? My guess would be they’ve newly learned the concept, excited that they are one but their inherent parianoia driven by the fact all their exes are ‘crazy’ makes them think they’ve dated a lot of psychos themselves and they don’t want another one. Of course you would be assessed as not one regardless of how you scored I’m sure during love bombing but what a rubbish test it turned out to be in devaluation. Just a guess tho.
We should love bomb people Alexis. Why not? We both need packages/gifts, etc.
I have been known to do this on occasion. hehehe
This is where I get confused .
I had thought the narcissism ( in L & MR) would reject the idea they are a narc . I understood they may take on the diagnosis but not fully accept it.
HG do you think a L or MR would ever SELF diagnose ?
Lesser would not. Mid Range would be as per The Mid Ranger Who Would Be King, therefore would not recognise what they are.
WokeAF, HG has confirmed in the past that whilst no lesser is capable of recognising himself as an N nor most mids, there is a certain type of mid (usually a LMR or MMR) who believes he is a greater. What this essentially means is that he largely plans instinctively, there is some recognition that he is an N but he is NOT as great as he thinks. The mere fact he gives away clues as to what he is means he lacks the skill of a greater because then there is a power shift to the individual he has confided in. I hope that helps. HG has written a little about this in one of his books, I have the book but I forget which one. Possibly platinum collection? There is a small section about the mid who thinks he is King.
Genius about the power shift by admission Alexis. I have a likely mid “friend” who knows something is wrong with him and he will discuss somewhat jokingly. (He has privately with me) Every bit as bright as some that would be academically cerebral/greater. Credentials unnecessary. Anyway, yes, he’s bright as hell but the true self knowledge isn’t there, and I knew this but could not express why. I really like & enjoy him and to be honest—it’s sad in a way to watch his behavior. I’ve had to talk to him about sexual comments for instance at work. He could offend the wrong person. They trip over their own feet. It’s like true self awareness rests on a chromosome holding substantial intellect, but only few are awarded this feature.
That’s interesting Lorelei that self awareness rests on a chromosone holding substantial intellect. Perhaps that’s where I’m lacking. I feel I have a fairly strong amount of self-awareness, too much sometimes and I’m lacking on the intellect hahahah
It’s called alcohol AS2016
That causes those who drink alot of the stuff to lack self awareness? Indeed! Thank you for your explanation HG.
No, the impairment if your intellectual function. I believe we witnessed some evidence of that on the blog a little time ago.
Sorry, I don’t understand?
Very good, you must be drinking now.
I haven’t been sober since lockdown. If I pause for an hour or so would it help my IQ?
That ship sailed at the beginning of the lockdown!
Hiccup
Alexis
You are bang on.
I remember an occasion where I visited the Lesser on the States.
We went out on my behest to Barnes & Noble.
He got VERY excited by the book, ‘The Sociopath Next Door’. He was positively giddy about it.
When devaluation occured, it was his Bible.
I was the narc. The sociopath.
Frightening.
That book is terrible.
HG
Why is it terrible? I do get your point but the stories in there were frightening.
I was especially drawn to the situation where a secretary in a psychiatrist work scenario diddled around with a make who was needed urgent help and the narc was fucking about with his mental health. According to the book, it was found out and she was dismissed.
I would really like to know why you found it thusly.
Too long to go into Renarde, it is poor material trust me on that.
OK. Get that. But it frightened me.
Jaws 3-D frightened some people Renarde, does not mean it was any good!
HG
Fair point 💛
HG
I am guessing you also font like ‘The Sociopath Next Door’
Hummm do we get out the Dickionary now or later…let’s chek wit Violetta and see what she tinks. Rotflmao.
Christian
You are more entrancing than watching cats squabble over the last piece of fish.
Talking about dictionaries, it’s about high time your kind acquainted themselves with the OED.
#justsayin
HG: Have you read Fallon’s The Psychopath Inside: A Neuroscientist’s Personal Journey Into the Dark Side of the Brain?
Whether full Narcissistic destructiveness was not activated by abuse or neglect, or whether some social impulse was activated by an upbringing that was both loving and morally consistent–no ignoring something one day and letting the kid have it for the same thing the next–Fallon makes a strong case that the interaction between neurology and environment is the determining factor, rather than either by itself.
No, I haven’t but I know of him.
I found it a lot more credible than The Sociopath Next Door. I think Stout had a disclaimer somewhere that the stories were composites, not actual people, so the bogus therapist, as creepy as she was, wasn’t an actual case with just the names changed. I thought I recognized some Nurse Ratched in that depiction.
There is a lot more on “Stout” believe me.
Let me guess: is Stout one herself? If she is, I’d guess Do-Goodin’ Mid-ranger.
Puuuke. I’d rather deal with a Grande Dame like Thatcher or one of Buford’s football hooligans than a Poison Pollyanna.
Among the Thugs is a great study.
Doesn’t sound like Mommy returned his affection.
Sadly it does not…😣😥
Thanks Renarde saying I was spot on re the mids who do psycho tests! I’ve had tests done on me by people who have attempted to seduce, I’m married so can’t fall for that again! So I’ve never experienced that side of devaluation so it was litterally a guess on my part based on what I’ve learned from HG. I’m sorry the liitle twerp did that to you!
Alexis
Par for the couse. Sadly.
Problem is Renarde we don’t have any (many) manufacturers left in this country! So we can’t save ourselves at a time when we need to. Everything is outsourced. Everyone expects the UK to be great, no matter what it is. Great healthcare, great food, great football. But we are entirely dependent on others. We’re not great and our weaknesses as a country are being truly exposed. We no longer do anything for ourselves. In fact as a country, we’re next to useless! I do hope Boris decides to review Brexit and that he can see past his own narcissim for the greatness of the future of this country. We are much stronger as a collective.
Ah AS2016, there’s that word hope again….
hope…sigh! how I used to love that word.
Alexis
I used to work in manufacturing. A Line Engineer on the making of MRI scanners. I know my onions and yes, you are correct.
When Thatcher broke the Unions, she also broke manufacturing.
It’s a complex issue. The Unions were out of control. One out, all out etc. But without native own manufacturing this country became lost in a miasma of service industries which mean largely fuck all.
All countries need a sound manufacturing base or we are forever at the mercy of others who have it.
We are now reaping the cost of the ‘Winter of Discontent’ in ’75. Inflation adjusted for 2020.
Personally, I’m ignoring Brexit. Brexit was a ‘McGuffin’ to keep the ‘prolls’ in check.
It matters not one jot who is in control, either Parliament or the EU. Did you note the Grovelling speech that the EU gave to Italy? That they were sorry they did not help that nation sooner?
I will at this point draw your attention to the League of Nations which utterly failed Abyssinia and Manchuko before WW2.
So much money poured into what? Exactly?
Hope you are ok there. X
You’ve got some interesting points Renarde. All good here! Phew! How are you doing sweetie? How is life in lockdown?
Alexis
Pretty good. I’ve been self isolating
For a good year. It’s like water off the proverbial.
I do feel very much for folks that arent battle hardened. It’s a VERY tough gig.
The sense that you are on your own. No one to help.
I think you are UK? Matt Hancock needs to be Immediately run out of office. Incompetent doesnt even run close.
It’s somewhat entertaining to see how this narc is behaving. But if course, peoples lives are at stake.
Not that he cares. Idiot.
Hhahaha yes I am UK Renarde, Matt is defintiely in the twat school of Ns. possibly type B? I’ve not seen enough of him really. What would you assess him as?
He struggles to convey much empathy, he recognises on one level that he needs to but its so unnatural. It’s hard to know what we now see as unnatural because we’re HG educated and what would be perceived as unnatural pre-knowledge. There are lots of people I would have found as slimey and uncaring. But I would never have thought or known what I do now.
People’s lives are at stake. When HG describes in one of his articles how he thinks of us like dolls picks us up moves our head like this, our arm like that etc makes me think of politicians on a massive scale and I feel like puking!
Yes, I’m breezing this lockdown thing now. First five days I’d say I found really tough even though I work from home 80% of the time. Then once my ET alligned with my LT that this is just how it’s going to be it was an immediate adjustment. Settling in to this quite nicely but I’m very fortunate and have to keep reminding myself of this. I’m not in the vulnerable category, not subject to physical or emotional abuse, no additional stressors. It’s not like that for most of the people and I’m keen to be (will be) getting out to help others very soon. Presently at the mercy of the government!
Alexis
Good one on Hancock. Middle (obvs). I think Upper actually. Some of his words recently such as (paraphrasing) ‘He might be a scientist but he advises the Government’ and of course ‘I wish I could magic PPE out of thin air’ are haughty and condescending.
I do not like Hitchins of The Fail but he did write how Hancock made him feel like he was back in Prep School being lectured by a PE Teacher.
I agree.
Cadre is more troublesome. Not a Victim.I do not think he has the polish of an Elite. Hitchins point is interesting so I am going with Somatic. A UMS.
What do you think HG?
Glad you are OK lovely. My lovely neighbours have been giving me food for the Overlords. So much that I wont have to buy anymore for a good month. I gave the kind lady who did this some flowers today. I also got food from the shrew. Who is now being perfectly charming to me. I had great fun today playing with her excitable dog who is gorgeous. I got many licks!
The mind doth boggle!
Interesting re your analysis of Hancock. I will have to pay more attention to the detail. Largely I just go as far as whether they’re lesser, mid, greater. It’s too hard in my paralytic mind to go beyond that! I’ll take a look once lockdown is over and I’ve sobered!
I recall watching some children’s animation years ago, I remember many of the characters (not all) had buttons for eyes, I seem to recall there was some significance in their button eyes. Like it meant they were empty souls (Although we don’t technically have a soul so in reality that would count for all of us, HG says we don’t, perhaps that’s just because he’s eaten them all hahaha). I digress, it sticks in my mind because when I look at the eyes of some Ns, it reminds me of that and I just see buttons in their eyes (that’s the LSD trying to break through the gallons of liquor).
My mind boggles alot!
I meant to ask Renarde, what did you mean by being in isolation for so long? because of the Ns?
I got distracted, also meant to say, what is Trump then? an ULN, yes. but Cadre? Would he be an elite because he believes he is both intelligent and somatic? He can’t be victim. I think HG needs a new category where they think they are somatic and think they are intelligent but really they’re neither – Lorelei once described her ex’s current partner as a swamp creature I think? something like that perhaps
Somatic.
feeling privileged to receive that little treat! thank you
Oooh hoo hoo hoo! HG , you’ve said we don’t have a soul !? I missed this! . I tend to suspect that is correct, but I suspect for different reasons –
Woke—am I allowed to strangle a colleague that is carrying on about her tummy ache? Does that make me less of an empath. Is it ok that we hate people?
I don’t know any of the things
HG, I see how you say Trump is somatic. A misconception is that somatics are not also bragging about their brains–they do, only they don’t do anything to show for it–they just think they ‘have it.’
The somatic lesser I knew was a male bimbo who jumped from girl to girl and tattoo to gym to tattoo again but he was convinced he was brilliant b/c he had a Nietzsche quote tattooed on his arm (albeit a very trite phrase from Mr. Fred).
I also work with a cerebral UMRN and he too is convinced how ‘desirable’ he is, when is merely average looking at best.
I still laugh at that vid you did about the lesser narc where you said, ‘He has a bald pate, a pot belly and is missing half his teeth yet he thinks he is Mr. Lover Lover Man.’
You are correct.
The quote tattooed on the arm entertained me.
That’s where I get a bit confused Bibi, who is cerebral, elite or somatic? With most it is pretty obvious but there are some, e.g. pantman, he is a MMRN who believes he looks like George Clooney, he most definitely does not. He is highly intelligent to the point he dominates conversations and lacks any self awareness whatsoever. I mean zero! He lacks any charm etc etc I see him as cerebral, but he would probably see himself as elite. And that’s where I get confused. Is it because he lacks the charm and other qualities of an elite which makes him cerebral even though he perceives himself to have those qualities but others would not. He is always giving guys tips on how to pick up women. They (the guys) and the females all laugh about him behind his back.
Alexis, your discussion of pantman is amusing. I need to see his pants. I have a forearm man who is ridiculous but he is so hot I melt and have to walk away, but his behavior is similarly idiotic. (He’s not made fun of openly except by those of us he is molesting!) He’s got to be a type B mid. Embarrassing thought to be attracted to, but if you saw him you’d understand. It’s ridiculous to be so beautiful and yet be so disordered. It’s a waste of flesh. Luckily we are covered in PPE lately so I’m having palpitations less frequently. He makes me weak like no other. He eats peaches as you know. I know pantman doesn’t do that for you thankfully. I saw a narcissist become hero in a really intense physical altercation last night, and observed the well fueled after effects & this felt so forensic and supportive of how HG has created this perfect lexicon & how it drives our thinking. It also renders a perfect example of how they appear heroic and a great person, and how the fuel flows. I watched and absorbed the demonstration. I know I added to it because I helped clean his bloody body but it seemed the polite thing to do, although unnecessary as he was tending to himself. I’m sure he liked it because he hates me and won’t talk to me because HG said once that I’d obviously threatened his control, he was eating up my subservience. (He deserves it though—it was truly a magnificent act) The powerful feeling achieved and the bravado and the well fueled demeanor.. It was narcsite text book. I feel fortunate my forensic lessons continue despite COVID due to my work!
I do not know what his pants look like. I started straight ahead of me. so I can’t comment. I imagine (if my imagination will let me go to my version of asylum of grotesque) they would be teabag y-fronts ewwwy!
Peachman sounds much better – at least he is icandy!
Peachman and Pantman – could make TV series hahah
I have found that when we are challening to them they don’t like it too much.
One N was a bit of a twat just prior to lockdown, I wounded him. I hoovered him (an empath hoover, its a new thing lol). He responded and called me a couple of days later and was all rather pleasant. He replies if I message him but has not instigated any contact. I presume he has a new IPSS (he is married – long term) or my wounding pissed him off. I’m annoyed with myself a little, I wanted to understand how lockdown would affect him and I was hoping to learn.
Pantman is deleriously buzzing with fuel at present which makes me want to puke! He goes through these cycles regularly though. Whenever there is a high it is always followed by a huge huge low.
Anyway. I’d also like to watch peachman eating some peaches, PPE or not. I bet his pants are sexy too!
Pleased your forensic lessons continue.
I’m sure peachman doesn’t tongue tie too easily. I have never been moved to weakness like this. I’m weak weak and sick. I just know he’s excellent in bed.
Would it help if I tested him out for you. I could then provide an honest opinion combined with a rating.
Let’s have HG evaluate! Is there a written test for such skills. I’m telling you—my friend said he can eat a peach. I’m drinking my Absolut Raspberry vodka and I’m half three sheets to the wind. I’m with an icy mid who loves me and I love him. But he’s old so he is like just a friend forever and ever. We planted trees and flower bulbs and we are cooking a pound cake. I broke out crystal glasses that were a wedding gift from that worthless fuck I married. But the glasses are pretty. I got China out of the wedding too From my disordered father. I have glassware shit all over this place. It’s a lemon pound cake. I dont need it because I’m on a diet because COVID is making me fat. The gym is closed. My pants are tight and this sucks but I’m just going to drink more.
Sounds like you have plenty of drinking vessels Lorelei. I bet you’re not fat either. Drinking more sounds like a great idea. That always helps make me feel slim ahaha I hope you had a good night x
Alexis—I am really glad my drinking is infrequent. I feel like hell. It’s not my fault though. It’s the virus. It’ll be a few weeks at least before I do that again. My elderly friend confessed all his infidelities with his ex wife though & I just knew I was right about him! It was one strip club story after another. I knew it I knew it. The baton is in your hand—I want a sober life.
I have a June bug.
“ I hoovered him (an empath hoover, its a new thing lol).“
LOL it is a thing .
Also I meant to say (but forgot because my convo was digressing all over the place) that it’s quite unbelievable what they take as a wounding sometimes. Honestly, the fact you’re asleep ffs! I do a lot of sleeping so I must be constantly wounding hahha
When peachman told me his wife never sleeps with him I told him maybe he wasn’t very good in bad. But I know better. I just know. Here is the cocaine analogy—if I do it once I’ll think I’m ok. A half hour later I want another line. I rationalize it. I keep rationalizing and as I do things unravel. The end is always the same. Empty bag and looking desperately for a way to put odds and ends of powder together to get one more line. But it’s gone. It’s always gone and not even a promise of a line in the corner of the bag. Frantically looking for just one more hit and it’s not there and I’m depleted. Little worse than coming off cocaine than narc withdrawal, especially when it was really good. I knew better than to flirt long with cocaine and this has to be similar.
Oh god! The ole, my wife doesn’t sleep with me any more like! Cocaine is much better than a man who can eat peaches x
I’m not sure if cocaine is better—I knew better than to dabble for long but that was years ago.
Helluva drug
A potentially better drug is an anti-malarial one with promise of protection if given in a prophylactic manner. I start it next week as part of a clinical effort. Unfortunately no party drugs! But maybe I’ll live to party?
On this post:
Cat says:
April 5, 2020 at 12:10
A very pretty N then. Id est Brad has been engaged to 3 different narcs? I think the world has judged him too harshly for the breakups indeed.
HG Tudor says:
April 5, 2020 at 13:09
It has
Having reread this, one might infer that Brad has been the “victim” of three Very Famous Narcisissts: Gwyneth the assault victim, Jen A. the bullied beauty, and Angie the man-eater…
Oh for Christ’s sake…it took me f**king ever just to scroll to the bottom of this thread to post a comment…I have never seen so much dribble and diatribe come from so many! Grinder and Tinder activity is at an all time high…”No Contact” Right… my ass…The Gays are still cock gobbling (with a mask of course). The breeders will NEVER stop, like roaches they are drawn to the living dead things called women that bleed and never die. “The vagina is a self cleaning oven” Nasty!!! how come that thing is always smelling up my air and it sure has a LOT of issues…the best thing is to put a vacuum up it and don’t stop the suction until the brain comes out!
Definite virgin.
ML, HG?
christianmelchizedek
‘…like roaches they are drawn to the living dead things called women that bleed and never die’
THIS^ is fucking spooky AF!. It’s like you have contacted Mystic Meg or sommet!
Or, you are spying on me!
Which is it, Sir?! Confess or I will unleash (or request nicely) the female black hunter Overlord upon your household. She holds full dominion over the ‘Powers of Darkness’. In fact, she would relish the opportunity. I told her about your HG Pussy Protocol Cuckolding Scheme and she might have got a ‘tad confused’.
She rared up and yowled her cute little head off. I couldn’t catch much but this came through…
‘…and you can tell that cunt that the last time I was in Hades, I saw his mother sucking goats’
Does this make any sense??
I am rolling with laughter!!!
Renarde
I am so over this low low low low range thing I could 🤢🤢🤢
Kim e
He sure is a beaut!
Christian, are you a member of INCEL?
I have questions for you if you are!
NO
They turned him down for being “too weird.”
I joined Mensa in ’92 it was the only place for the Genuinely “too weird”. I thank you.
It was the only place that would have you.
You sound like I expect one to sound being angry and anti women and attacks the idea of sex. What a shame. I will continue my search to find one to ask my questions then.
It’s not by choice I refrain from sex…trust me. It’s the lack of a suitable candidate.
Just become one and find your answer for yourself.
Hello Getting There, I remember my MR sister used to be so proud of being accepted in Mensa. I asked my brother if it was true and he said that they were both accepted when they were young but after the first meeting he never came back because it wasn’t his cup of tea. He didn’t elaborate why but it’s just funny that my sister made it sound like it made her so important while my non narcissist brother didn’t care for it.
Hello Getting There,
Also I just daw tout response at the You Are Being Conned thread. I didn’t get notification again. I usually get email notofications of tout reaponses but when HG takes a break from moderating I notice that I don’t get a notification after he comes back to moderate. My guess is there is a time frame where the notification gets sent. Anyway, I will reply tomorrow as I am getting ready for my son’s birthday. It’s so nice to read your response and I have a lot of thoughts that your comments inspired. Take care my friend!! 💗
Christian, no thanks on the joining. I can be curious from afar on the internal and social development of a person who later joins such a group. “Candidate?” Is sex or you the prize for the other person?
Hello, Mommypino! I’m so glad you wrote and shared here! I look forward to reading your thoughts on the other thread! I know someone in Mensa. He didn’t bring it up; others would. I have the impression that society thinks of it on a pedestal and some members adopt that belief. Your sister must have received plenty of fuel inside the meetings and outside when sharing.
You do have me thinking, though. The type of intelligence people connect with Mensa starts early in life and as you shared about your sister and brother joining young. How many members were treated Golden by their parents and education system because of the intelligence?
Great question. All of my half siblings were treated as Golden Child but by different parents. My dad’s wife was told by her dad when she was little that he wished that she was a boy. He was a narcissist and she was his only child. When my three siblings were young my dad’s wife convinced my dad that she will raise the girls and he will raise their son. They all lived together as a family but my dad was not allowed to participate in the decision making with regards to the two girls. The two girls were raised where they were free to do anything that they wanted, no boundaries and no rules. His wife believed that it will empower them as women. My dad on the other hand raised my brother with rules but they did activities together which was centered on sailing which was expensive and my sisters believed that our dad spoiled him on that. Both the girls turned out to be narcissists while my brother is a normal.
I recall many many months ago, someone squawked at me that I must be mistaken over having had a excellent parents and a safe secure childhood , that it would be unusual to be a narc magnet if so .
I take it now that we know it’s a genetic addiction to Narcs, HG, does that clear up the idea that we must’ve been done wrong as kids?
My dad is a normal and my mum was a carrier Empath and they lovingly produced a little Contagion. Surely this isn’t so strange then, that is have both the genetic addiction to narcs and be a magnet for them , simply as the Empath I am?
(And yet have , from good parenting ,the core foundation of self worth to escape each narc, even before knowing what they are)
I think it’s important it be known that safe , loving parents produce empaths and these empaths are still narc magnets .
Hello WokeAF, I totally agree with you! My dad’a parents we’re both empaths and raised him with love and he still ended up being a narc magnet. He married a narc and he had a mistress in the other end of the world who is also a narc. And he never figured it out. He stayed in that love less marriage with his wife until she died and after her death he kept on talking to me about her narcy behaviors not to judge her or to tell me that she was bad but to tell me how troubled she was from her upbringing and he was trying to still figure her out. Until the end he was trying to understand why she was that way like she was some unsolved mystery to him. His need to fix people really screwed him up although if he didn’t become a Dirty a Empath I wouldn’t be alive and my cute kids wouldn’t be alive either so there are always silver linings lol.
Also Getting There, I think that my siblings were treated as Golden Child not because of intelligence but because of how their parents were. I am actually not sure if my brother’s upbringing would qualify as a Golden Child. My dad was always extremely proud of him but he always had rules. My initial thought was probably wrong, my brother was not a Golden Child.
Mensa is just for braggarts.
1) If you are not interested in the meetings then what is the point of joining other than to merely brag that you are ‘smart’ enough to enter? Yay me, I have the mind of an accountant!
2) Just b/c you meet others with ‘high IQ’ doesn’t mean you have anything in common.
3) IQ is a measure of functionary logic and the file drawer mind, so those creatives, you are fucked b/c your mind does not fall into their conventional system. Adios, Shakespeare, Dickinson and Kafka. You don’t compare to the functionary number cruncher. Boo hoo! You suck!
4) There is no reason to mention your IQ ever–unless it is vanity. It is pointless. What does it prove? Who cares? What have you written? What have you discovered? Or do you just repeat what you have been told?
If you score high on that test, good for you. But know it is just one test and there are many different types of intellects.
Wouldn’t you love to know all the answers to those questions, sadly you never will besides you wouldn’t understand them.
Bibi that’s probably why my brother didn’t keep going there after the first meeting. He isn’t a braggart in the same way our sister was. He is proud of his accomplishments but he doesn’t bring them up and if he does there is usually a self deprecating joke attached to it.
Mommypino,
That’s sad how your stepmom felt because of her father’s comment and then further took actions that then hurt her children. I see children who are smart with other characteristics, but have seen family friends brag about the intelligence alone. When the most attention you receive is due to one trait, I wonder if that is the trait you think you are alone. In your step sister’s case, if she is living in the Wild West as a child, but the structure of school and the recognition of working at something and earning it, I can see that becoming an important trait. I read somewhere that dads should not repetitively state “you’re a princess” or “you’re so beautiful” to their daughters because the belief is that the daughters then think that is what is important and not brains, humor, or sense of self.
WokeAF,
I agree with you. I don’t have a narcissist as a parent. I think empaths can teach their children to be empaths. I was taught as a child about helping others, accepting others as they are and loving them in spite of you constantly hurt, recognizing what impact you have on others, give of yourself, love can conquer anything. When I have talked with my parents about this, they reminded me of other things they said. I then remembered that they did say those and if I had taken those to heart instead, I wouldn’t be at this site today as I would have been a normal.
Getting There,
I wonder about what WokeAF also said about genetics. I remember FYC was talking about the effect of genetics as well in the creation of an empath. It must have been that you have genes that causes some empathic traits to be strongly hardwired in you that even though your parents told you about the other pieces of advice that would have made you less empathic, you didn’t even recall them until they reminded you because it didn’t resonate with you as much as the advice on how to be empathic. The empathic words resonated with you much more deeply because that is who you are to begin with. Just my thoughts.
I think I now understand what you meant about being treated sa a golden Child because of intelligence. I think I missed what you meant when I wrote my first responses. I think that you have a great point. That is probably why she ended up being an Elite instead of a Somatic. Our dad was indeed extremely vocal about praising us about our looks. Although she kept on telling me that he never told her that she was beautiful but our dad always told me how beautiful she is. His relationship with his daughters was so constricted like he didn’t know how to connect with them anymore. It was weird that he felt more able to express himself freely with me when we have never met in person until I was 26. Sometimes I wonder if my dad was a narcissist too but because of many other factors such as never abandoning his obligations with me and the many times his emotions felt strong and real I still currently believe that he was an empath. But one of the narcish things that he loved doing to me was telling me that to be truly honest I am the prettiest daughter he has but he told me to never tell my siblings that he said that. And he says that in a mischievous manner like it’s our secret. I don’t know if normal dads do that. I have never seen my husband do that to his daughters. He never compared them, not even secretly. But I have also observed that my dad was much more highly narcissistic than my husband. So I think that my dad’s emphasis on how women should look attractive and their mom’s emphasis on intelligence caused my sister to be an Elite. But to address your original point about being treated special because of those traits, yes both my sisters have gotten many compliments about their looks being the stereotypical blonde California girls but only the middle sister got compliments about her intelligence. The older sister I believe is a Somatic Upper Lesser.
Getting There, I feel that I have to add that even though that gesture of my dad was narcish I thought that he was really sweet to me to tell me that. But it still looks narcissistic lol but he was really sweet and cute. 😊
Anyone else here slummin’ it? Other than routine exercise and shower, I wear no makeup, no jewelry, hair in bun to accommodate face mask. Jeans and tee. I need a brow wax, a hair trim and a pedicure. Been testing how long to not wash my hair–went 2 days and is a little oily but ok. Still smells good. My hands, however, are impeccably clean with all the soap and sanitizer.
In England do they spell it sanitiser? I’ll bet they do.
Idk, there all all there zoom meetings. I kinda comb my hair. Also washing it at times. But that’s a stretch.
*There are all these zoom meetings
The Samsung autocorrect must be a narc.
Bibi—no makeup and no hair styles. (No point and I’m not able to at work because I’m covered in mask/hair/eye stuff). I did my own pedicure and had my hair trimmed/colored recently.
Yes but it’s a tiny price to pay considering those in induced comas in critical condition.
Watching the protests in US to remove lockdown is truly shocking some woman whinging about her grey roots , a Darwin moment methinks,
Bibi
We do yes!
I need to do me roots and dye my eyebrows. I did pluck them the other day. That’s pretty much it for my beauty regime. I was born a ginger and turned dark but bizarrely a lot of my eyebrows, my arms and my legs have blond hair. So I don;t bother with legs any more. I’m not very hairy.
I gave myself a pedicure the other day and have bought a face mask. But I gave myself another mask the other day whilst watching the ‘Lair of the White Worm’. Watch it if you can, it’s on Youtube for free, it’s utterly bonkers!
Renarde:
Any Scots in your ancestry? One ex (half-Scottish) had some pretty arbitrary pigmentation.
Vi
Yes, my surname is Scottish.
May well be a factor. He had blonde hair but reddish beard and eyebrows.
I am certain all you ladies still look beautiful. Let us embrace our pioneer days. Willa Cather, it is!
K,
Regarding Jennifer Aniston…
February 11, 2020 / Last updated : February 11, 2020 HG Tudor
Johnny Depp v Amber Heard – Telephone Call Analysis
Thank you E&L
I didn’t see HG’s confirmation on this thread re: Jen and I was just curious about the original convo.
Alexissmith2016 says:
February 12, 2020 at 11:45
Hope, HG has previously identified Brad as the empath, Angelina a greater and jen a mid. Just pointing this out to assist in your understanding and ability to move forward.
https://narcsite.com/2020/02/11/johnny-depp-v-amber-heard-telephone-call-analysis/
K,
Moi aussi! Where the hell is an HG authentication in writing? Until then…it is only hearsay and possibly heresay!
I think Angelina is a psychopathic mid ranger, not a self aware individual. Either way, she’s a vampire.
At least she was attractive before she went started self-harming via plastic surgery.
E&L
Hahahaha…correct! It’s hearsay/heresy until we can find confirmation. If it’s somewhere on the blog, I am sure one of us might stumble onto it sooner or later.
K,
Glad you understood and corrected my misspell of heresy. My CoD creature is stomping around upstairs in my mind reminding me what a fucking idiot I am. Hence, I am one key stroke away from disaster and/or humiliation.
E&L
Hahahahaha…I had no idea that you had spelled it wrong; I thought it read: heresy. Don’t beat yourself up; I recently wrote: thrust me, instead of: trust me and I read: Instagram, not Ingram, in one of alexissmith2016’s comments. Shit happens!!!
I recall seeing HGconfirm JA as a narc . I don’t recall seeing the school .
I was very surprised.
It must’ve been in the last few weeks bc I didn’t read the whole thread to follow up. (limited time lately)
NOW I’m intrigued. AJ is a GREATER? LMao
So we noticed this right ;
JA
AJ
My Narc’s reaction about pandemic has been that he continued posting politic symbols on his facebook page as if nothing had happened ’til the end of March. Then, about 2 weeks ago, he wrote that he would stop posting “because of the situation”, concluded with “thank you softly”, and disappeared from all his social media. Assuming that I shouldn’t have gone and see what he was doing, and that I breached my no contact regime (I am guilty, I admit that…), and assuming also he didn’t catch the virus, I wonder why he’s behaving in such a way. Could this be a manipulation? If so, what kind of fuel is he going to gather by completely disappearing from social media? By the way, he is a middle mid range, as you stated in my last narc-detector, and he hasn’t got an Intimate Primary Source.
Yes, it is a manipulation. He is focussed elsewhere and wants people to contact him (through other means) to enquire as to his well being and ensure that he is okay. It is a silent treatment which is a form of provocation and yet another method of asserting control.
Indeed since 25th of April, (in Italy The Liberation Day) he has been posting again although nothing has happened, and without say anything about his absence, although the emergency wasn’t finished yet. I had thought him to be in a fuel crisis owing to lockdown, and now that it might be over in a few days he feels a sense of relief so he keeps on behaving as usual. However in most of your work there are minutely described all his typical behaviors, it’s really unbelievable!
HG Ihabe not been here in a few months
I’m terrified
I hate Trump but I will say he is on the right path with the WHO.
I’m not a lunatic but a scientist and everything in my gut says this bastardised virus is genetic modification.
An innocent escape yes but there is a lot of crap being covered up
Kiki, Some people will always disagree with Trump whether he’s right or wrong and that’s fine. But I agree that he needs to go after WHO. I can’t believe that WHO relied on China’s statement that there was no human to human transmission after they were not even allowed to go in and inspect for themselves. Even a regular auditor would only issue a disclaimer of opinion if not allowed to have access or finish the auditing procedures. No auditor would parrot the claim of any company if they were not allowed to verify the accuracy of the claim. One would think that WHO would at least have the same diligence since countries rely on the things that they have to say. Also for WHO to criticize Trump for the travel ban to and from China was not just wrong but absolutely dangerous. The director of WHO, Tedros also looks like an Upper MR to me and reminds me of Dr. Nuwan.
* I should say no auditor ‘in his right mind’ would parrot a company’s claim without being able to verify. They would open themselves up for a lot of troubles for that. WHO should be held accountable too.
WHO is a very organizational narcissist, and highly political, too.
The CDC is not far behind.
All wanting to gain control of our bodies.
So true.
Ugh, AeroNarc, an “angel” type, is posting things online to help people avoid the spread of germs. Cringe.
My “Angel” AeroNarc is posting sunset pictures on social media to cheer people up and getting all kinds of fuel in response. Is he desperate yet, one wonders? I bet he knows he won’t be getting fuel from me . . .
Why are you looking at the narcissists social media? That is a no contact breach.
Jesus Covid-19 should be renamed to hoover-19time!
You were so right HG, even my second cousin four times removed has been hoovering
Indeed AS2016, that’s why it is important that people pay heed to my work, as I know you do.
I think being bored, isolated, lonely makes us very susceptible to hoovers right now too. It really is the perfect storm for us to get ensnared again.
Hence why the 50% discount remains in place and more than ever my loyal readers will disseminate my work and platforms wideky
HG I’m a fan of yours really you helped me .And I say this kindly but some people need to get their head out of their arse re narcissism right now .
It is the least of our worries.
Trust me on that one .
Agreed. Also why it’s incredibly important you tell us who all the Ns and Es are (celebrity ones). Then we can be really prepared. No doubt this would also help us to help you spread your message far and wide mwah xxxx let’s start with Lorraine K (I hope not) and Holly H (definitely an N) and Bob G (don’t really care either way).
Looking at Google images: Geldof seems kind and humble and a bit torn by life. All that HG describes empaths as being.
I’m not sure Cat. I haven’t studied him at all so I truly have no thoughts one way or another. But I do know that many Ns are incredibly capable of coming across as humble and torn. But as you say many empaths genuinely can be humble and torn.
I had thought Sheridan Smith was an empath. Again not someone I’ve ever studied but I had thought she came across as very loving towards her parents in an interview I saw, it appeared genuine.
HG confirmed she was an N.
I find it much more tricky with celebrities as I need to interact with them in order to fully appreciate what they are and I would say there are only a small percentage of every day people whom I’m unable to categorise now. But I need to feel it in order to be certain myself.
Hm, reply button only found to this comment, but I have read the wikipedia of Bob Geldof, the reminders, AlexisSmith2016, and yes, it is worrying that both his exwife and his daughter died in drugrelated issues. Also Michael Hutchence died.
In love triangles, as HG states, there is usually a N involved. And then that’s Paula Yates? Well, idk, but I do admit that people around Geldof seem to have been feeling miserable, which can be a red flag.
Or the sign of an empath not leaving, but taking care of family as best as he can. Idk.
I always thought Bob Geldof came over as quite controlling. Bit telling?
Anybody who desires to shoot the whole day down is clearly exhibiting a need for control.
HG, what is Keir Starmer? Of course an N but which school?
Capable individual
I fucking hate you! So god damn Fucking much!
Anyone else who would like to answer I will love you for all eternity 💋
Hate you
Hate you!
hate you! I#’ve even come upstairs to use my laptop (because it’s easier) to hate you some more!
hate
I even got tired of hating you but I still hate you!
still, even now! I still hate you. Just in case you were under any illusion that I iidnt. I still do.
I’d stop drinking if I were you.
Hmmm thanks HG. My teeny sober brain now realises you mean he’s a greater because you wouldn’t call a mid a capable individual. Thank you. Xx
Still drinking I see.
Well what the hell does that mean? That he’s not a greater then? I’m guessing not now? Especially after your comment to Violetta re believing his own lies. I don’t know anything about him and I’ve never even heard him speak but he is definitely 1 trillion percent a narc because his eyes are the deadest I’ve ever seen.
Anyway what ever he is. I had lots of fun! I was laughing even more this morning reading through my comments than I was last night as I was writing them (I’m such a god damn loser for that lol) Uh god the sad little fun you can have drinking during lockdown hahah
“If”
Jesus Christ. You’re kidding me! How can his eyes be so dead if he’s not? What the hell? Now I’m extremely confused. Okay I’ll have to watch him very very carefully indeed
I did not say he is. I did not say he is not.
He definitely is. I just watched a short interview. When he talks about things which would require some emotional input, there is nothing at all. He looks as dead on the outside as he does inside.
Please can you do a game of guess who then. A bit like the quizzes.
I shall consider it, but first you must conquer your drinking problem!
Typical N always projecting and blameshifting
alexissmith2016
Honestly, I can’t tell “if” he is a narcissist; I just watched: Keir Starmer’s Labour leadership acceptance speech in full – video.
However, if KS is a narcissist, my money is on MMRN.
I will be interested to find out. I definitely need to see more of him and try and learn more about individuals using the ‘A very’ series.
Um, Alexis, sounds like love-hate to me. 😉
Hahahahahaha….it most certainly does!
Or share it with the rest of us. Seems to be pretty high-proof, so good for reducing flu virus. Very important for us all to look after our health in these [hu-UKK] difficult times.
Alexissmith2016
Hahahaha…I don’t know anything about Keir Starmer but he looks like a MMRN.
K,
If he is an MMRN, he looks to be a very high achieving one.
WhoCares
He looks damn good so he could be an UMRN. Greaters are rare so I usually stick with the most common school (midrange) if they don’t look like a lesser.
theletterafterj,
Greaters are rare – true. I have never see him talk etc…just from images he seems pretty stiff. I suspect Greaters to have more cognitive empathy and at least ‘fake’ a bit more emotion – even Taylor Swift can do this I think.
I am currently trying to figure out if Justin Trudeau is a mid-ranger…if he is an empath – he is the calmest Empath ever.
K, I have never paid this much attention to political leaders; don’t care much for politicians.
WhoCares
You and me both; politics can be boring. With Trump, it’s like a three-ring circus, however, I do watch him so I can practice my narcissism lessons. There’s so many manipulations; it’s amazing!
I watched: Keir Starmer’s Labour leadership acceptance speech in full – video and, if he is a narcissist, my money is on MMRN; I don’t know much about Justin Trudeau to form an opinion.
I liked PM Tony Blair, especially when you compare him to “W” George W. Bush. The contrast was great.
K,
I may have to do some comparative video watching!
I need real life examples to apply my learning. Specifically, if Trudeau is a narcissist he has to be upper mid-range or a greater…too polished and calm…I just don’t think that an empath can be that collected and calm off the cuff. Sorry to focus on him; I was just listening to him on the radio.
Trump is actually entertaining and reads like a true upper lesser showing his colours these days.
I am 🇨🇦 And I don’t take much more of politics, but I in obviously watching his daily address, and I fucking hate the sound of his stupid “soothing” voice and his stupid face now and I never felt that way before. I believe he is a UMR or LG and he’s so smooth I gotta think LG
I am happy w the way he’s handling things so far though.
Woke – I listened to him live on the radio this morning (so no visual distractions) and there is something in his tone. Something off, but I cannot put my finger on it. He just makes it look too easy – so completely unperturbed…unflustered.
You might be close to the mark.
Yes his facade is excellent. Verrry smooth. But he doesn’t speak like a normal person. I don’t know the words rehearsed, the empathy is rehearsed.
However he’s not an UG .
Maybe MG …. but my best guess is LG.
The way he speaks actually reminds me of American Psycho/ Christian Bale.
Eeek…”The way he speaks actually reminds me of American Psycho/ Christian Bale.”
Honestly, not a comparison I had considered. Possibly, because of the good guy image he projects – or desires – you’re right though; there’s a definite smoothness there.
Plus charm.
Thanks K! He definitely does look like one for sure! I’m just confused now thet HG didn’t call him a twat
Because I know him better than you do.
hmmmmm HG, are you Keir Starmer?
That’s Sir, to the likes of you thank you very much
Hahahaha good one! I like it!
You’re welcome!
My pleasure alexissmith2016!
He does look like a capable individual. Perhaps he is less twatish than other narcissists.
gaggh now I’m as confused as when HG confuses me lol
I wish I was more interested in politics
Alexissmith2016
He blinks a lot on the Twitter announcement movie.
That could be an indication of lying.
But oh well, they are all liars.
I’m guessing Upper mid-range Elite.
If he is a narcissist, he believes the lies and therefore the supposed indicator of lying is inapplicable.
Ah yes, thanks.
That makes sense.
You are welcome.
Re: lies and Keir Starmer, your comment explains why Jim Carey believes his own bullshit.
https://narcsite.com/2019/09/02/brilliance-baloney-or-bullshit/comment-page-1/
Thanks Autie. Hmmmm well if th blinking is not an indication of lying per se, it could be an indication of lacking controlneeding to obtain control. I will have to check this out. Thanks for the tip off!
Kier .. nope I’ve got bad vibes. I don’t like him. Alexis is right his eyes are dead dead!
Interestingly I watched Sophie Ridge on Sunday this morning interviewing our Health Secretary Matt Hancock who reminded me COMPLETELY of how HG speaks!! HG’s is a bit of a lower tone but some of a Hancock’s is too. I was washing the dishes and thought is that HG on the telly? 😆
https://youtu.be/mydpjW6Sx5M
Theletterafterj..
I watched trump talk about wearing masks but he doesn’t think he will, it’s optional, kings, queens, the president, dictators nah not good for him and he doesn’t think he will do it. I was laughing so much!! The guy is totally comical in everything he does! He’s so funny! Afterwards, Melania took to Twitter to ask everyone to be safe and wear masks! A little bit of ‘fuck you’ there I think to Trump 😆
Presque Vu
Hahahaha… classic lesser behavior, in light of significant scientific evidence, he denies the seriousness of the virus and asserts control by declaring he will not be wearing a mask (that’s for the little people (contempt)); Trump is omnipotent and the rules don’t apply to him after all.
Hahahaha…Melania’s ‘fuck you’ tweet is challenge fuel! Disagree with a narcissist and you can expect a malign manipulation to get you back under control real fucking fast!
My daughter and I laugh when we watch him speak; he’s a riot.
For the record, covid-19 is a mild flu, at worst… It has not killed anyone. If anyone has died “from” covid-19, that’s bogus bs.. they may have died “with” it, but not from it. People need to do the research and wake up please! This is important!
Presque Vu says @April 5, 2020 at 17:19
“is that HG on the telly?”
Oh, my, gosh. No way! That man has such a wimpy, whiney voice. Yuck.
Plus, he’s such an utter prick with crap acting skills.
Lisk I don’t think it’s HG, I know it’s not but for some reason just the way Matt delivered, the vocabulary, the nuances, the obvious education.. I thought of HG. I find Matt not displeasing, I like him, I don’t think he’s a narc but what do I know!
“If he is a narcissist, he believes the lies and therefore the supposed indicator of lying is inapplicable.”
Thought about your explanation of narcs smiling, HG. Scientific papers all filled with description of the Fake Smile (lacking crows feet around the eyes) are of no use to the reader.
Because the narcissist looks very happy smiling from ear to ear with crows feet and the bag of chips too! They really believe they are happy, but as you disclosed to us, HG, it’s only a demonstration of fuelling. The narc not being aware himself.
Correct.
The vowels are similar, but Hancock sounds a lyric baritone on his top notes and HG doesn’t go that high, at least in speaking. Also, HG’s chest notes are significantly lower than Hancock goes, at at least in the YT interview I heard.
Thanks PV. Yes there is perhaps a scale of deadness in the eyes of Ns. I’ve not quite worked out what that means yet as some Ns have very natural looking eyes and yet can be evil bastards.
Sadly I’m pretty sure Matt is another N though
H.G. , you said that if “he is a narcissist, he believes the lies and therefore the supposed indicator of lying is inapplicable”. Does that mean Narcissists always think they’re telling the truth? Or do they sometimes just feel entitled to lie and is that why they don’t show any recognizable signs of discomfort when lying ? Thank you
Lesser or Mid-Range believe the lie. Greater do not, but do not care. If you wish to understand why this happens and how it works, please arrange a consultation and I shall explain this is detail to you, to aid your understanding F74.
K – HG confirmed my babydaddy as a LMR victim. He’s a Trump fan even in 🇨🇦 here.
He finally admitted there’s a virus but doesn’t believe mainstream media, nor does he believe anything on the internet – his son caught him out on that last night – asking what source WOULD he believe -we were dos issuing the tiger that contracted it from its handler in the NY ZOO-and ignited his fury a bit when it was pointed out -that basically he doesn’t defer to any authority at all besides his own. He DOES go along with Trump in general though…but he thinks maybe the tiger thing is connected to the Tiger King documentary to scare ppl
NO authority is listened to unless it accords with his own opinion at that time.
WokeAF
Based on your comments, he is definitely a LMRN victim. LMRNs can’t control their fury as well as MMRNs. Many of my lessers believe in conspiracy theories and discount the scientific evidence re: Covid-19. I have been informed, by a lesser, that the Chinese created the virus to kill Americans and destroy the economy so they can rule the world.
It’s always fun in NarcLand.
This is NOT funny seriously.
Alexis, I can’t reply up above but yes, she is a swamp creature and I’m not taking it back because someone says I am mean. I knew I was right about her. He hates drinking but she’s drunk all over the place and he had to have her baptized. (long story) He is a fucking idiot and even knew some Jesus was needed to control her and maintain his facade. I’ve never seen something like this. She trespassed onto a property and assaulted someone and is on probation. The person was able to secure a restraining order. I would never have photos of myself online pictured with porn looking women with boobs the size of the Goodyear blimp. I am not making this up. It is real. I was really embarrassed at first, but now I am amused and I hope he takes her to every event. She told my daughter last night that she had shin splints and needs treatment. I get a text from my daughter and I told her no one gives a damn about a shin splint during a pandemic and she can take Tylenol and quit whining. Like she is even qualified to assess a tibia. She is more qualified to decorate a porn set for ambiance.
Comic relief alert:
Gwyneth Paltrow is complaining on DM about the lack of privacy in her mansion, attributing to it a reduction in Lurve.
This ignores at least two facts:
1. People crammed into 5th-floor walk-ups manage it somehow; and
2. Gwynnie’s makeup-less picture, which shows very little return for all the health-n-beauty rituals she advocates.
Best reader reaction:
“That’s it the torture is complete I will do what ever you wish but please dont bore me with that Paltrow woman again”
On rare occasions, Narcissism is fun.
“which shows very little return for all the health-n-beauty rituals she advocates.”
Great line.
I’m so bummed I have this project to complete. It’s so fun in here today!
Lisk:
I envy you: you’re needed somewhere. I can survive for a few months without my tapping into my presently pathetic rollovers (or asking help from family members), but I took a kind of narcy pride in knowing that MY students would learn proper citation, essay structure, and grammar even if F.U.’s Golden Staff met deadlines by putting three comments on a five-page research essay (two of the three being, “Not APA.,” with no mention of what was wrong or how to fix it).
Blood banks are recruiting for serum donations, so I’m going to call, tell them I think I had the mild form, ask if they can use me, and if so, when can I come in. If they find the antibodies, I can feel happy on two fronts:
1. I shall have served some purpose; and
2. If I’ve already had it, I won’t have to worry so much about getting it. If I do get a mutated form later, it is likely to be even milder, since I’d have at least partial immunity.
Watching the news is a ruddy nightmare. I should probably stop watching TV news and stop reading it online, especially New York stories. The people I’m in touch with seem to be OK so far, but I did two shows in Bensonhurst, used to shop under the El in Jackson Heights, hit the beach at Rockaway, etc. If it’s possible to suffer geographical pain along with survivor guilt, that’s how it feels. Went through something similar after 9/11: I’m no better than the people who didn’t survive, how dare you attack MY city, and sheer rage at the fact that this couldn’t be solved by slugging somebody.
Is Gwyneth a narcissist? Please let it stop, can’t some normal people exist. Is she? I know Tom Hanks is normal, I know this for sure.
I don’t know if HG has commented on her, but her Goop routine seems pretty narcy to me. Vaginal steaming and Jade eggs, referring to a breakup as “Consciously Uncoupling,” giving people quack advice that doctors say could be dangerous as well as expensive and useless. She’s not a conscious con artist; sincerely thinks she’s a wonderful influence. The lack of empathy for people in lower socioeconomic groups has always been amazing, and she doesn’t even try to disguise it. It all sounds pretty Mid-rAngel to me.
She is a narcissist.
God dammit. Is everyone just a horrible person? I just have one more. Jennifer Aniston. I’m asking to keep up on Brad’s number of ensnarements.
MMR type A or UMR?
I think Gwyneth is really cute. I’d sleep with her even if she’s not a human and I’m not gay. She has a sun kissed look and I like her hair.
She’s rotten to the core
I think it was Violetta that commented about her website. I was really not aware she was so fixated on matters of sensuality and found her site (upon looking today) to be obvious. The basic education on sex she provides is haughty—it’s nothing new and she’s not bright enough to know it’s not interesting. She also is grandiose enough to promote sex toys, which seems an unusual choice as a mother with children of a tender age in the public eye. I would think of my kids being appalled immediately. ** Having adult children and being in her position may generate a better boundary. I know I am an idiot here per se, but don’t think I’m ever talking about nonsense to my children. I had no idea she believed herself to be an expert on such matters.
A very pretty N then. Id est Brad has been engaged to 3 different narcs? I think the world has judged him too harshly for the breakups indeed.
It has
HG, Have you seen the video of Michael Bublé elbowing his wife then pulling her back to him like she’s a rag doll? His beautiful wife’s facial expression there was pretty disturbing as her eyes looked sad even though she tried to hide it with a smile. I have no doubt that he’s a MR.
Also HG, what do you think is Bruce Willis? Is he a narc or an empath addicted to narcissist Demi Moore? I thought it was so weird that he left his wife and young kids to be quarantined with Demi Moore and their grown kids. His wife looks like a total sweet girl empath just looking at her pictures.
Yes I have seen it.
I have not analysed Bruce.
Classic comments about Gwynnie from a celebrity gossip site:
“I feel sorry for her steamed vagina. I’m sure it’s very confused.”
“would someone be able to sue Paltrow because they burned their dick on one of her vagina candles? asking for a friend”
Lorelei:
I’ve read things like 1963 fashion magazines and trashy Victorian novels to get into the head of a character, and sometimes I do it just for fun. I’ve sat in the library looking at ’50s Mademoiselles, 19-teens Town and Countries, trying to figure out what it is like to feel embedded in that world. Sometimes, I’ll look at an ad for an 85-year old lipstick and think, “I want that.”
Gwyneth is straight up ’70s Cosmo. Her whole-grain “health” advice, her assumption that the sex revolution is still necessary in order to fight all that ’50s repression, the triumphant announcement that “we can talk about these things now!” (I can barely remember a time in my life when people weren’t talking about it), etc. Meghan Markle is the same way: they acquire the traits of 2nd-wave Feminists without ever having lived through any of the oppression they rail against.
My parents had a novel called A Year in the Life of Marin County, which was made into a movie called Serial. Per Wikipedia, it covered the overlap between the counterculture and the Yuppies:
est, the Fischer-Hoffman Process, and Jonathan Livingston Seagull; radical feminism and Sierra Club membership …. kids are sent to free-form summer camps offering survival training and “spontaneous rap sessions”
It had details like “creative divorce”–sound like Conscious Uncoupling to you?
All about living an Authentic life–for people who can afford it.
Violetta—interesting observation you make about acquiring the traits. Her site wasn’t original and the “education” elementary. The g spot discussion is a copy cat. I just didn’t know she was into all that. The sex toy thing unnecessary as she has nothing on Lelo. It was grandiose and I don’t want to know what sex toys she likes.
I don’t see the Cosmo in GOOP at all. She seems more like the original Our Bodies, Ourselves.
…probably rolls her own tampons.
Doesn’t ‘conscious uncoupling’ equal ‘I control the divorce’?
Yes allied with pretentious horseshit
HG, I love that you say Gwyneth is rotten to the core. I want to punch her in the face. Such a pretentious twat.
Plus, I can’t see the attraction.
She’s not someone who I’d notice walking down the street.
But it’s a pretentious twat that’s perky from herbal steam cleanings and squooshing Jade eggs!
Maybe she did do Harvey to get Shakespeare in Love. I’d want a steam-cleaning or 20 myself after that. Erg.
And Gwyneth is now auctioning off one of her Oscar dresses–to help with Covid. OMG and it is of great sentimental value to her!!!! Who wouldn’t want it???
LOL
As for Oprah, she has done tremendous damage to the culture with her exploitation and charlatans. Her dumbed down book club, her magazine with her on every single cover. Even Martha Stewart doesn’t do that. Oprah is all about shallowness, materialism, image, me me me, but I am a good person, don’t you see?
Do you remember when she complained in France that she was not let into some store b/c it was after hours but then she did the racism victim. Poor me, the billionaire. She has crashed people’s weddings b/c who wouldn’t want her there? Duh! Then she is shocked when the wedding party tells her to leave. Sense of entitlement and grandiosity.
She is so insecure and needing to be liked. Her 50th b-day bash that was ostentatious crap for 2 days. How dare anyone not agree with her–she doesn’t bring anyone on her show who disagrees with her. It’s all an Oprah love fest.
Even if you could say her intent is in the right place, that she means well, she is so fake and phony and with great power and influence comes responsibility. You don’t recommend garbage like ‘The Secret’ when you have that much sway. Literally, people in the media were terrified of offending her b/c she has so much power and could ruin you if she chose.
Has she done some good? Sure. But she has done a ton of damage–she is so out of touch with the working person, but then she pretends like she ‘gets it.’ Gwyneth doesn’t pretend to be in touch with the working person–she is at least obvious with her elitism.
Anyway, on and on. I can’t overlook her sanctimony. I am glad to be able to type these comments and not be called names on account of it. Literally, there was a time 15 yrs ago where if you said anything bad about this woman, you were then a bad person.
Bibi – “You don’t recommend garbage like ‘The Secret’ when you have that much sway.” This made me laugh.
I think original Oprah (when I had cable and could still stomach the occasional daytime show) when she was just starting her talk show was more relatable and authentic.
thank you for your honest and open analysis of Oprah Bibi. I appreciate that. It’s certainly given me food for thought. I shall need to start observing her a little more. Other than the odd chatshow I don’t know much of her. I have only ever seen her pre knowledge where to me she appeared warm and friendly.Of course lots of empathic people have strong N traits but I shall definitely take a closer look.
Vaginal steaming WTF?!?!
As numerous gynecologists have noted, the vagina is a self-cleaning oven. There is generally no need to do anything to it beyond regular showers/baths and wearing clean underwear.
Anything that can’t be treated by adding yogurt, buttermilk, or some other form of acidophilus to the diet should be referred to a physician. All Gwynnie’s nutty ideas will achieve are messing up the pH balance and possibly causing an infection.
How do you know Tom Hanks is normal Lorelei?
Alexis—something about his energy doesn’t feel deviated from a normal person. He reminds me of a normal male friend I have.
Thanks re Tom, I’ll have to take a closer look and see
Lorelei that was the closest anyone has come here to verbalizing how things are for me
You can FEEL it. it’s so true
Alexis—I bet you are fun when you are drinking. That was kinda cute last night!
Awww thanks Lorelei! Well I was definitely having a good time hahahah
I see narc in Tom’s eyes, and I think it transferred to his son.
Surprised at gwyneth being a narcissist. I always liked her. She seems empathetic and cares about people and the world.
Seems.
Gonna agree with you here Lorelei. Tom’s wife Rita looks relaxed, calm and herself. Victims of narc abuse look more tense, or very very quiet.
Awww I hope so. that’s a lovely thought
Thanks Alexis
But yeah I understand you wondering. Tom Hanks is known for the outlandish odd faces he makes in films. Cute, but what planet is he from really? But he has never cared about looking the absolute sexiest, imo. Cool.
And there Are some really really rich Nonnarcs out there. Like Oprah. I believe Kenny Rogers was an empath. And Sting is. And Jon Bon Jovi. Some empaths/normals are simply very good with money, no doubt. I’m hoping Tom is one of them.
That is great! I knew Oprah and Brad. Didn’t know the other empaths! bloody fantastic! I hope Tom is too
Sting? Ha ha haha
Oh damn! Another of yours
Alexis—it makes sense. The need to be seen and given attention.
Kenny Rogers? Looking at his relationship history (didn’t he marry a 20 something in his 60’s? I’d guess he’s a narc
Just watched the first episode of ‘Quiz’, for anyone who hasn’t watched it yet, it’s about the British army major who cheated to win, ‘who wants to be a millionaire’. In the drama they portray the wife as the one who pushes her reluctant husband onto the programme. But I’ve just googled rl photos of them and Charles Ingram has greedy little eyes which makes me think he’s the narc, if the brother of Diana was portrayed accurately (not looked him up yet) he has to be a desperate narc too. What about Diana HG? I have no feeling for her either way with regards to her photos.
Is Sting a narc, HG??
He seemed fantastic back when he held a long seemingly thoughtful concert, transformed and replanned the day after 9/11.
Genuinely had me fooled.
Cat,
that is the good old façade.
I remember a post here on Narcside about the song, every breath you take.
The song is about a stalker.
Then the song Roxanne, ugh.
And his eyes! Brrrr dead eyes.
I suspect “narc” wherever “seemingly thoughtful concerts” are held.
LiveAid was a narcfest.
Correct.
I think also you missed Lorraine Kelly off the empath list wahoo!
Oprah is rotten.
Awww no Bibi, Oprah is an empath. HG has given his official seal of approval. What makes you think she is rotten?
He did???
I’m with Bibi.
HG says Oprah is “Team Empath”. Relief because I always liked her. I like Dr Phil too, even though he can be a bit 1950s on his views on women sometimes.
Lots of people don’t like Oprah but I believe she is an empath. Empaths are not saints. I thought early on the Dr. Phil might be a normal (not having much reference for those) but over time have arrived at MRN. I no longer wonder how he could resist my pleas/attempts to have HG as a guest haha.
Haha – NA: “I no longer wonder how he could resist my pleas/attempts to have HG as a guest haha.”
I agree with you in thinking Dr. Phil is a narcissist. I am unsure of school.
However, I absolutely cannot stand the sound and tone of his voice – soooo, I’ll go with MRN too!
(Re: the sound of his voice…could be because my mother would always have her television on during the day, in the background, and most daytime TV makes me ill to my stomach…Dr. Phil’s voice makes me extra cringey.)
Yeah some salesmen and media people seem to think that pulling a strong rural or southern accent is an argument itself, for having made a correct analysis or for being honest.
Cat,
Interesting.
“pulling a strong rural or southern accent is an argument itself, for having made a correct analysis or for being honest.”
I actually had not considered his accent or even stereotypes surrounding it. I don’t hear people in real life often with such an accent – only in movies, in media and otherwise. To my (Canadian) mind a rural or southern accent suggests hospitality or the quality of being “down to earth”. I always thought a British accent (dependent on region of origin), stereotypically, is thought to convey a correct analysis or the quality of being authoritative.
Ah I see what you mean WhoCares. I mean the other way around I guess.
When a salesman wants to sound convincing he usually pulls the rural nextdoor “I’m just a simple guy” to underline his own honesty or that he is truly convinced that this is the truth of the matter.
I don’t know about Dr Phil and Oprah, but her collaboration with Eckhart Tolle is way more risky imo.
Interesting you mention that (Eckhart Tolle & Oprah). I’ve thought about that myself. Can you elaborate Cat
@WokeAF I guess I know less about Tolle than you, to be frank,
but selfhelpgurus with a lot of abstract, nonconrete blanket statements
“The power of now”
“the separation of thinking and awareness”
will ime only make ppl stuck, buying more and more books, hand out a lot of cash, trying to investigate what he means. Usually doesn’t do good.
Depends on what the true desire of the buyer is.
It’s true you don’t need a library to find Truth. A handbook from the right person might nudge you though. You might like Sailor Bob Adamson, hes much more Frank. You can find him and other podcasts on urbanguru.com. Some really good stuff there and free. 😉
Old Tolle before the Oprah machine was much more fun for me . He’s so beige. LOL I love him tho. Little elf. I adore his little wooly sweaters
I met him New Year’s Eve of 2012
He came to rent a video in the store I worked at , (he has a house on my island in BC) — really late at night. Guess he thought he’d escape being seen but my stupid satanist narc coworker called him out. It was amusing . Coworker was saying “ I’d love to have coffee and pick your brain” and Eckhart was all “oh yes, mmm yess we’ll do coffee..” without a hint of sarcasm but boy he couldn’t wait to get going . New Year’s Eve video renting on a tiny island, ffs poor fucker can’t go anywhere
Absolute Truth is easy to mimic for the guru-narc. (Osho, for example. Or Charlie Manson) They catch a glimpse – then ego co-opts the enlightenment and makes it part of Itself.
Conceptually correct, but not experientially , or abidingly being LIVED.
I didn’t like the Oprah train and I was a little surprised he got on it. I suspect he was a little surprised himself LOL
She reminds me of ppl who decorate themselves and homes with drums, smudge and rose quartz but don’t mind tearing out the asshole of a slow cashier.
Ooooop! Correction ;
Urbangurucafe.com
I guess he could be a narc. I liked a short news interview I saw though. On Youtube, called Baiters. “Beware of baiters” It was about narcissists but he didn’t use that word.
I can’t see it, honestly.
I quit her show in the mid-90s because of so much “I” in her language and actions.
Maybe I should focus on her body instead. She’s beaten it up so much, internalizing lots of abuse I guess. She tries to get control but can’t.
I don’t know. HG, do you talk about narcissism and obesity/eating disorders anywhere?
Not specifically, they are linked to control in a number of ways.
I do like Dr. Phil.
He did. @K do you recall where at all?
I’m very interested to learn what makes you think Oprah is an N Lisk? I hope my comment does not come across as antagonistic in any way. Sometimes it’s tricky to convey tone in written format. I’m just genuinely interested in how people perceive others and why.
Here it is alexissmith2016!
HG Tudor says:
September 22, 2017 at 16:09
Oprah is in Team Empath.
https://narcsite.com/2017/09/08/6-million/comment-page-2/
Thank you k
My pleasure alexissmith2016!
as2016,
Everything is about Oprah.
Oprah. Oprah. Oprah.
Everybody’s pain, everybody’s success, everybody’s everything.
She turns every You into I, I , I, I, Me, Me, Me, Me, Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah.
I find her so-called empathy disingenuous and totally unhelpful—as well as dangerous, helping to create a culture of victimhood and blaming that she has used to exploit in order to maintain her Empathy Empire.
I much prefer the open narcissist, HG, who gives practical, useful advice that advocates ultimate self-responsibility without pretending that he’s doing it for anyone other than himself.
(I imagine this is the honest, truth-seeker in me speaking here.)
You’ve got a good point Lisk and she does talk about herself alot. I just listened to an interview (Oprah being interviewed) so I guess that was a tad biassed because she would be expected to talk about herself then. I guess though it could also be her N trait of pride which prompts her to talk about herself and some people do get anxious and talk about themselves alot too. That said I’m also aware that Ns love, love, love to talk about themselves – it’s a given. I suppose not all Es will be good listeners and not all Ns will talk about themselves. One N I engage with likes to let me talk about me alot and I don’t mind hahah.
Honestly speaking, pre knowledge I would have said she was a kind person. POst knowledge if HG had not said she was an E I too would have questioned what she is and probably unable to draw any firm conclusion. It’s difficult to know whether this is confirmation bias and I see her empathic traits purely because HG has said she is an empath.
I have met her, she is an empath.
Yay! I didn’t disbelieve you. Just trying to convey that it is not always that easy because some people have very strong N traits which manifest in different ways. I find it especially hard with celebs. I need that interaction. I need to feel the silent treatments and the word salads and all other manipulations first hand. Even as a NISS with an elongated GP you can still feel them, albeit more subtle than if you are an IP (except the total bitch ass females!) but it’s there. I struggle when simply observing people so am completely reliant on your information unless they do some glaringly obvious things such as Trump. Thank you though. I’m naturally extremely grateful to you for affirming and that she actually is one. I will love her forever on that basis alone!
Oh I know you did not disbelieve me AS2016, I added this to assist you in overcoming your indecision which is understandable based on the points made.
Alexis—it’s evening for you. Are you drunk yet?
hahaha no I’m not drunk. Friday night drinker here, despite HG’s smearing of me being an alchy
Pah, the evidence speaks for itself you lush!
Lush?
Sorry crashed out on the sofa! Like I was saying, gin is the fruit of the land, you can drink it with tonic, you can drink it with wine, you can drink it with campari, you can cocktail it, there’s pinapple gin, coccunt gin, lemon gin you can add it to your salad, your deserts, you can have gin soup, gin crumble, gin gumbo, you can down a shot or as I prefer to do, down a bottle..or three! that’s about it.
HG am I a good whore or a bad whore?
You’re a pickled whore
I’ll take that as a good one then
A good whore gets fucked just like a bad whore so who cares Alexis!!
Alexis2016
I don’t think you’re a whore at all but you brought up coccunt gin. Typo, wishful thinking, or Freudian slip?
Hahahah thanks NA I’m just going with HGs definition. All women are good whores or bad whores unless they’re a madonnna. Good whore does what he wants bad whore doesn’t. Yup Freudian slip lol
I am drinking this evening! I gave raspberry vodka & flavored sparkling water.
oooh that sounds delicious Lorelei! I wish I was there x
Alexis—also it’s props to be a bad whore, it’s hair pulling!
I can do hair pulling hahaha
I’m was just going with Hg’s definition. All women are good whores or bad whores unless they’re a madonnna. Good whore does what he wants bad whore doesn’t.
I’ll do anything Alexis.
Bad or good. I’m
Having a COVID party.
hahaha an Ns dream then nightmare hey!
A covid party sounds interesting. I turned Tuesday into the new Friday. WHo even knows what day it is under lockdown.
I can’t keep mirroring your boozing Alexis. I’ve turned over a new leaf. My new hobby is weed control. I’m excited to use some weed & feed on my garden hose nozzle. I just bought it. I also bought lily bulbs & more baby trees. My daughter video taped me dancing last night and I would almost rather have a sex tape circulating on TMZ. Truthfully though, the fact that me being drunk as an event is a testament to having improved substantially. I used to put alcohol in coffee cups.
Well according to HG most people can’t hahah oooh nooo the video tape sounds fun! can you send that to me via HG too please ahahahaha Blimey alcohol in coffee cups! jUst yours or other people’s too lol. Could brighten up a church coffee event!
Indeed, I was dancing to “She know” by NeYo and Juicy! Haha
Omg. I am confused about which whore gets what! Are you bad or good if you get spanked Alexis? I’m not sure of the algorithm on this. Would a Madonna figure ever get a little smack on the ass? Would a Madonna figure want a smack on the ass? Or, is the Madonna figure more pristine? Would being spanked or wanting spanked cause a loss of status by becoming a bad whore?
I imagine, though I’m no expert that if you liked spanking and you were a good whore you would get it. If you liked spanking and were a bad whore you wouldn’t get it.
If you didn’t like it and a good whore you wouldn’t get it and as a bad whore you would.
If my understanding of a Madonna is correct they would be sexually unappealing to the narc either because they are sexually unappealing full stop or because they have become stale.
I think I fluctuate between being good whore bad whore a lot! perhaps a madonna to some. I can’t imagine too many though hahahah
Let’s do a flow chart on good whore/bad whore with a paddle depicted at the top. A thinking tree of sorts. A visual aid and have HG add to the knowledge vault. I will never have my ass paddled. I want to be the paddler. So, should I tell my new candidate intimate partner primary source? Or wait until they are ensnared? Truthfully though—I think I’ve already got my hooks set and the infection is percolating.
A flow chart sounds good ahahah – love it! I reckon we could definitely charge commission for this.
I think you’re the sort of person who could tell them up front or wait until they’re ensnared. I’d say they’d be up for pleasing you at any stage of the seduction.
I hope you don’t have the infection. Make sure you look after yourself.
I think we are both getting an infection. A robustly intelligent individual that is interestingly enough, not a space alien. Smarter than I’ll ever be for sure, this attracts me.
I’ll design the algorithm and send to HG. I’ll use your thoughts as the design model. COVID has me bored stiff. Until we get a true surge (if we do) I’m doing some work remotely. Will HG send to you if I make it? I think it’s a fun little exercise.
haha great! I’ll look forward to that Lorelei
“..and I’m no expert” 😆
That was actually totally coherent and correct Alexis, well done.
My MMR (DLS) was once trying to make me bad whore who didn’t want it but got it —but it turned out I did want it! . So then I was bad whore who didn’t get it.
Lmfao you two . Also the day of the week is a Defin a thing of the past.
hahaha you bad, bad whore WAF
Do we need to spank Woke and teach her a lesson!
Depends whether she likes or not?
Only from narcs LOL
When someone is that successful it makes us wonder Alexis. Oprah is truly committed to creating a sense of community for the girls in her school which is nice to know.
Of course, I am dubious of them all and always impressed when an empath makes it! Although makes me sad they then become prey to so many Ns.
Brad Pitt springs to mind. Now I’m wondereing re AJ and her being a greater. I wonder what it would be like in a house where there is a greater parent and greater child. How would that dynamic play out?
Did HG say she’s a greater? (AJ)
I thought she has psychopathy but not necessarily self aware..
I believe so. @k ?
alexissmith2016
Here it is. There’s nothing on this thread that indicates that AJ is a Greater.
HG Tudor says:
January 9, 2020 at 08:45
The upper hand in children proceedings is just another manifestation of control.
Jolie is a narcissistic psychopath.
Lorelei says:
January 9, 2020 at 10:46
She thinks you’ve implied Jolie is self aware? Is this what you implied?
HG Tudor says:
January 9, 2020 at 12:57
You will have to wait and see when she is put under the Tudorscope.
https://narcsite.com/2020/01/08/a-very-royal-narcissist-part-6/
Thanks for finding this K. I imagine life with AJ was difficult. Brad blew up on the plane and she was able to make it appear that he was a problem, when in fact, he was reacting to her passive aggressive bullshit no doubt. She was able to make him out to appear aggressive and manipulate the kids into “how scary daddy is.”Vultures until the last bite. If I recall she triangulated the children further by having the oldest come to rescue against Brad on the flight.
My pleasure Lorelei!
Ah that’s brilliant! thank you K!
Apologies for being the provider of misinformation Lorelei – well remembered!
I guess yes. What do you think?
Psychopath or not—Jolie needs a triple cheeseburger.
My pleasure alexissmith2016!
Oh right on!
Thanks K . I must’ve misunderstood or…I dunno
I’m gonna guess Middle Greater myself tho!
My pleasure WokeAF!
HG, is AJ a middle greater and is she self aware
WokeAF, That doesn’t make someone a Narc. My husband and I have a 28 yr age gap and he’s the most wonderful and authentic person I have ever met. He always has my back. No shifting sands. No silent treatments. HG has never said that a big age gap makes one automatically a narc. I don’t know enough about Kenny Rogers though.
so I’ve started watching the documentary re Diana and Charles Ingram. It does seem Diana is a narc. She has some degree of calculation although fails to execute it well so I presume an UMR If she’s a greater, she’s shit at it and needs to be sacked! She struggles to cover up her irritance with her husband so perhaps a cerebral mid. possibly elite. she’s intelligent but lacks control. (I have more to watch, much more) Charles is such a dimwit its hard to say. I would imagine he’s not too dissimilar to Prince Andrew.
alexissmith2016
Did you miss this sentence?
“Prince Harry is an empathic individual. He has inherited Princess Diana’s caring and empathic traits.”
https://narcsite.com/2018/05/17/a-very-royal-narcissist/
ah no I love, love, love Prince Harry. Yes HG, it is Friday and I have been drinking again! tusk tusk! This is a different diana and charles https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D5r8yE_bT78
alexissmith2016
Hahahaha…it’s not your fault at all; I misread your comment.
alexissmith2016
Oops, my bad! Wrong Charles and Diana. Sorry about that alexissmith2016!
Ah no please don’t apologise. Nothing to apologise for. If there is one thing I’ve learned from HG and the other Ns of the world it’s not to apologise , well unless I really have to of course 😂😂
Alexis: at least Jolie can bloody act. I’m not saying talent excuses John Lennon’s wife-beating and kiddie-bashing or Steve Jobs’ treatment of his high school girlfriend and their daughter, but they made some contribution to the universe.
The thing I find so annoying about Meghan Markle and Gwyneth Paltrow is they are mediocre at best. If they were as passionately incompetent as Tommy Wiseau or Ed Wood there might be a kind of clueless charm to it all, but they don’t even have that. They can offer neither expertise nor enthusiasm.
Hahhaa you’re incredibly worldly wise violetta
Alexis:
Only when I’m not in the situation myself. I have perspective whatever on the people I interact with.
Alexis, I think it is getting pretty boring with all the shut downs. Can we youtube how to steam our vaginas?
steaming as we speak
I think we are all just resorting to desperate measures for entertainment. My daughter and her friend tried to bathe the cat yesterday. The shower curtain rod fell and they were unsure why it was such a disaster. I went off—“You don’t bathe cats—are you stupid!?” The highlight of my day is that I get my very own N100 mask I get to pick up. It’s so exciting. Maybe I’ll be more safely spat upon.
I finally got the hoover I wanted yesterday. Had to wait that one out! Hasn’t particularly helped me understand him in lockdown though. Hopefully the book will enlighten…
I’m glad Alexis! I have some work to do at home. I’m hesitantly wanting to look into taking the kids to some Ontario haunts I’ve not visited in years, maybe end of July.. I have lots of time to assemble my plans. I’m prepping a Mexican ensemble to devour at this moment.
oooh I love mexican! sounds delicious lorelei. You sound like such a good mum!
Cat—did HG confirm Jennifer A as also a narc? I can’t see the comments but thought you were talking on this matter.
Lorelei
I couldn’t find confirmation of JA’s personality.
My curiosity rests with not only the confirmation but why? Why? Because she has many indicators: Recent divorce, success, (although her foot was in the door from daddy)—she wrote her mother off at one time just like Angelina had with her dad, Brad was attracted to her, she does the “good girl” image quite well. But—what if she was setting boundaries to what sounded absolutely a narc mother, success because she got lucky (Friends was genius at the time), blah blah. It helps pull together other views of people. That is why we ask. Alexis made a recent inquiry as well re, someone and I assume for similar reasons. My bet is on yes. If HG confirms with an associated view/brief explanation of why I’ll make a small donation to the angel fund.
He did indeed. Jen really had me fooled. Thought she was a sincere kind person. Brad’s been engaged to 3 narcs. Man.
HG has definitely confirmed JA is an N. Not sure where on the blog but she’s 100% N
alexissmith2016
If you find it, please, let me know!
Of course K
Thank you alexissmith2016!
February 11, 2020 / Last updated : February 11, 2020 HG Tudor
Johnny Depp v Amber Heard – Telephone Call Analysis
I looked up BRAD THREE N…go figure. K taught me well!
I’ve read several articles regarding the increase in emergency calls around the world due to domestic violence since stay at home orders have been put in place. Being familiar with HG’s work and having read this piece in particular, it’s no surprise at all. Narcissists are relying heavily on those in their household for fuel needs. I’d like to see some statistics on how many Golden Periods end during this pandemic. Stale fuel for breakfast, lunch, AND dinner, YUM!!
Valid observation.
It’s really worrying MB. I’m extremely fortunate in every which way during lockdown. A tad bored but getting used to the new way of life. I can’t help but think of all those poor individuals stuck inside with a narc and violent or non-violent and how horrific this must be. My heart absolutely goes out to them all.
Alexissmith2016,
“I can’t help but think of all those poor individuals stuck inside with a narc and violent or non-violent and how horrific this must be. My heart absolutely goes out to them all.”
Yes.
Every time a winter passes (since I left the formal relationship) I think: thank goodness *this* wasn’t the year I was stuck with my narcissist…but THIS year? This one tops them all – it would have been horrifically challenging. Or just plain horrific.
I’m glad you got out Whocares! Bloody well done! Here’s to a narc free lockdown xx Well…almost…xxx
Woohoo!
WhoCares:
“Every time a winter passes (since I left the formal relationship) I think: thank goodness *this* wasn’t the year I was stuck with my narcissist…but THIS year? This one tops them all – it would have been horrifically challenging. Or just plain horrific”
I do not think it is possible to agree with you more! Part of me feels sorry for his ex (now his current) because she is the recipient of his nastiness, but mostly, I’m so tremendously grateful it’s not *me*!!!
Caity,
I agree with you on the sense of gratefulness for not being in relationship with the narcissist at this particular time – and the concern for his current IPPS…that is partly why I shared HG’s work with a friend who works at a women’s shelter and who has contact with many in domestic abuse situations. This would be an excellent time to share HG’s work with others in similar social services – if they’re not overwhelmed by Covid19 worries, they may actually be quite receptive. And then maybe some IPPS’s elsewhere could be helped.
I’m bored as I can be Alexis. I went out to buy some bulbs to plant just to get out, although I need a few weeks before planting them—I can’t have them bloom before the first week of May due to frost. This sucks.
Is buying bulbs essential Lorelei? I don’t remember seeing that.
It is. I have my dirt and pebbles too. You have to put pebbles in your pots at the bottom for drainage, and drill holes in your pots too. I can teach you. I have extra mulch as well. The bulbs will be planted in 2 weeks. I’ll cover with a thin layer of black mulch. Sprouting will follow and I will use fertilizer to influence the blooms. Miracle grow works fine, even store brands. The breakdown of nutrients is the key to look at. I know things about things.
Lorelei, HG is not going to allow much more of this landscaping talk. He may have to revise the rules just for you!
Yes, I may have to do some pruning. Mind you I do enjoy planting or more accurately, burying.
I thought you were more of a cremation type of guy!
That is for the dead. Burying for the half-alive.
You slay me, HG! Er, make me laugh that is…
He may allow such piffle. HG may like some aspects of gardening. My very own home and garden show will be featured this year in a particular “social media” site. Lorelei just designed a kitchen color scheme for a friend. She was lost but now she is found.
* mumbles *
Speaking of landscaping…if I can’t get a wax soon, this low fro is going to require bigger panties…at the very least a comb over…
OMG! Dying NA 🤣
@NA oh god reminds me of when I did a home wax. I ended up with so many blood blisters all over. I looked like I had some sort of STI Hahhaha not pretty.
Alexis2016
I tried that once also. It looked like someone beat me with a 2 x 4 down there. 0 stars. Do not recommend.
NA, Topiary? Talk about yoga moves…
Pahaha – FYC!
Awww Lorelei, sorry you’re bored. I’m getting used to it now and have a new project lined up which will more than pass the time – thank goodness! Bulbs sounds good. I’m not into gardening but I do love a pretty garden. My neighbour is always pottering around in her garden, she looks like she’s really enjoying it, so adorable. Something I wish I enjoyed, it looks incredibly relaxing.
I won’t be bored as much after today—I have a situation that will encompass time professionally. But it’s not 100% of the time, the bulbs will be planted! I am also monitoring home schooling. It’s funny that I have the interest in gardening again. It was gone for quite some time!
Awww that’s great! One of the best things when our love for hobbies returns
Lorelei
I won’t assume that this is what MB meant by her question, so I’ll ask my own:
What business is deemed essential to be open and risking the health of their employees and customers to sell bloody bulbs for planting?
And yes, by extension – I’m asking: are you daft in putting yourself and others at risk for something the squirrels might eat.
Dear NA—they sell bulbs at the grocery which is where I went. They also sell mulch and planters, etc. My level of risk right now is indeed quite elevated due to my work—and I’m actively engaged in the management of COVID patients due to my work, so until this is over, I am wearing a mask in public. In fact, I just left a briefing on how to use different intubation equipment/materials to decrease the aerosol issues. I’ve been on vacation until now but it’s over with. I’m also wearing a mask around my children. Data from NYC is that 40% of hospital admits are under age 55. (This may be a bit different today)
One of my young colleagues was intubated Sunday but fortunately is off the ventilator. If anyone knows how serious this is, it is me. We won’t be able to staff ECMO machines. So, would I go out for just bulbs after swimming in this cess pool? No. Not now after I’m back at work. Was purchasing bulbs risky today—unlikely. In three-six weeks when we hit a peak will I have time to purchase bulbs? No. I anticipate being at work a ton because I have the fortune or misfortune of being able to manage both emergency and intensive care patients. Sorry to be snarky. It is just me—I’ve gone to efforts to make sure my dogs/cats/kids are cared for in case I need hospitalized for instance. I’ve swapped phone numbers among various friends so they can manage my home because if I even get a cold I need an inhaler. I’m not taking this lightly.
Lorelei
Being on the front line and having expressed to us the seriousness of the situation, I suspected there was a different circumstance and explanation than the impression left by your comment to Alexis that basically said: you were bored and went out to buy some bulbs just to get out. I didn’t think you to be reckless , so asked you to expand. I didn’t expect such a comprehensive reply (more like: grocery store) but thank you. Snarky was appropriate given my question so I accept that, but I hope you understand it was because your initial comment seemed a bit glib and I didn’t think that impression of you apt in this circumstance.
Never a real issue NA. And I was bored but also needed additional items. But don’t think the bulbs didn’t influence which store I went to! One problem with leaving for “just” a frivolous item is that the hand hygiene etc.—creates a disdain for it. It’s like it’s a pain in the ass to clean everything I touch, not touch my face etc!
Lorelei, please stay safe! The healthcare workers truly are the heroes in this crisis. You are running toward the danger while the rest of us are running away. May you be protected and blessed.
There’s no way NA could’ve known your position. I understand your snarkiness, but I consider both of y’all my sisters. She will give an eloquent NA reply. And I pray, the squirrels don’t eat your bulbs while you’re out saving the world! ❤️
MB
I don’t anticipate an issue between Lorelei and I. It was opportunity for clarification. Perhaps I was mistaken that your comment to Lorelei was asking the same, and thought it prudent to expand on her initial comment to clear up any misconception of risk taking due to mere boredom. I did not really think that to be the case.
Much appreciated what you are doing for us all, in healthcare, Lorelei. Nurse friends tell me about their workdays, I am completely floored by their workload.
Lorelei,
I had some conversations with a ‘retired’ nurse (who is having to cover extra shifts due to Covid-19) leading up to the crisis point for Covid19 here locally. Those talks were more about how her hospital was not truely prepared for this situation despite the facade and air of ‘having it all under control” offered to the media by the higher ups. On the ground less experienced medical staff didn’t even know the correct questions to ask; I know her experience will guide her through her work.
Experienced, level-headed medical workers like yourself are surely a must needed resource at this time.
Plant your bulbs; it is one small way to convey some “normalcy” to your children during a time when they could potentially be very stressed about the abnormalities of the current situation.
Take care of yourself ❤️*
*This may have come through multiple times. Apologies.
Hi Whocares. I actually think the overall response regionally has been more adequate than not. But I’m not in a hot spot either, so my view is impacted by being quite comfortable currently. My role is easy right now—it’s just that it may not remain as it currently is due to a number of factors. I only saw two patients in a span of hours. That was not stressful! Not only bulbs need planting but I have grass seed to fill in! You know you have to water that seed daily?
Lorelei,
You can always hope for April showers?
For May showers! Hey—I found the product of a decade recently. “Goof Off” Paint remover for carpet. It’s life changing and color fast. It got black varnish off a white rug. I’ve never seen anything like it. It gives me hope.
Speaking of black paint and the like, I am really wishing for the can of chalkboard paint I had in storage – could really use it now for one wall in my place and a low-tech means to home school.
This just jogged my memory! I have a brand new set of white board markers and an eraser stashed aside…plus a small easel type whiteboard.
My son isn’t going to be happy with me come Monday.
Omg I just watched a chalk paint video on YouTube. I decided to go with a Sherwin a Williams primer and paint my nephew recommended. It is a really crazy blue and inspired by a fellow empath. I do need to prepare the book shelf. I also have a 1965 Lane Princess hope chest from my mother. It is the ugliest thing I’ve seen—like Brady Bunch ugly. It will also be painted in the coming weeks. I was able to retrieve my hand sander thing from my ex husband. He had to maintain his facade and give it back. I don’t want to make my arms too tired.
“Brady Bunch ugly”
That made me laugh Lorelei.
Go to http://www.ebth.com and look for Lane “Princess” Aroma—Tite Cedar Chest. It is the exact item. They should have made one in 1965 and stopped before producing more.
Whocares—you came to my mind in the night due a house flipping proposal from a friend that came up in discussion. I think I told you about the Southpark “White people flipping houses episode!” My work neighborhood is littered with potential and beautiful old houses that have been neglected. Basically, my mind no longer feasts on such beastly material!
Lorelei,
“House flipping” – don’t think I would ever do that, although it sounds fun.
I used to have an art studio in a heritage district and I would have loved to get my hands on just one of those old gorgeous houses and fixed it up! (The timing would have been right and, given the neighborhood, it would have been a sound investment – unlike the rest of my life at that point.)
I didn’t know you were an artist? Or are? Tell me! I would much prefer living in town (even near where I work) but the neighborhood situation isn’t as safe for the kids, and especially my work neighborhood. The house flipping can’t be any worse of a choice than marrying my ex. Talk about a money pit. Endless drain. On the topic of narcissism though—he’s causing my oldest the same anxiety I experienced. It (his impact) will keep spreading like wildfire for sure. I think the conversation with her may indeed shift into coping strategies due to behaviors. She’s already been upset repeatedly over the derogatory comments he makes and all of the kids haven’t warmed up to his comrades. I am guessing they pay attention to the warnings to stay away from kidnappers and his friends look like people in utility vans.
Lorelei,
Was. Am…just not practicing for a while now. And never full time – always alongside a regular job, until near the end of my entanglement.
I am sorry regarding the effects of your ex’s behaviour on your kids, does sound scary..is your oldest not of the age when she has some say in whether or not she goes to see him?
Unfortunately kids don’t achieve an age where they have a “say so” where I am. He does have less influence and rarely deploys any energy to be overbearing, which is beneficial. He makes people upset and uneasy quite often. He is unpleasant and I can see the anxiety. (Not all the time of course) I also don’t wish for her to experience him negatively all the time, that would be illogical to triangulate us in such a manner. I just felt quite sad observing the effects over a simple matter last week.
Lorelei,
“He does have less influence and rarely deploys any energy to be overbearing, which is beneficial. He makes people upset and uneasy quite often. He is unpleasant and I can see the anxiety. ”
Perhaps the pandemic is exacerbating his negative behaviour? I hope, for your daughter’s sake.
Whocares—I’m so excited. My baby bulbs are peaking out of the mulch!
Lorelei – tulips?
No dahlia babies. Tulips are in full bloom as I planted many about ten years ago that still flourish. I let my tulips die down and don’t cut the brown off—I believe this process feeds the bulb. I mulch over the ugly. I have many lily and iris plantings waiting to come up.
Dahlias: nice. Sounds a beautiful flower garden Lorelei.
Agree! I planted more since that post and some morning glory seeds. I need to stop. I’ll have to dig new beds otherwise and that’s not of interest as I have plenty.
Nice avatar, Lorelei!
Thanks Whocares. It’s my new kitty. She was way too pretty to be at a shelter. She molds to me like a fur coat and is absolutely lovely. Dainty and cute. She was found in a really crap neighborhood, I think she used to eat mice. I won’t hold it against her.
She’s a very pretty white cat. 💛
She will be catered to like a queen!
Gorgeous new cat, Lorelei! She looks quite content. So good of you to choose a rescue! Thank you!
Thank you FYC. She is absolutely adorable. I just got her soft claws in the mail, but don’t want to harass her with them for now. She needs brushed but again, she needs time. She was found a year ago in a bad neighborhood. I don’t have any idea beyond that. She’s the prettiest cat I’ve ever had. She has a fancy collar on order. I think she’s too refined for living amongst the lower lessers.
Most definitely, Lorelei. No lessers for that beauty. She is painted white, so she might be safe, but best to leave her fully equipped with her claws!
Precisely FYC. No lessers. I can’t find her today yet to put her nail caps on. They are multi colored. I will say it’s a bad idea to ask a rescue if they have any de-clawed cats. I was instantly a narcissistic pariah psycho. I was berated by a woman with blue hair & chin hairs. It’s like walking into the Catholic Church and asking for an abortion. Not a good idea. We got a kick out of it at my work because a few friends said they were going to call and report me for torturing the cat. Holy shit I never said I was going to perform the procedure! It was an inquiry. Ms. Chin hair offered me a sick or biting declawed cat in punishment until she relented. I was spat at until the very end. Even a lower lesser wouldn’t slide in between the sheets with this bitch. They’d run in fear! HG would walk away too—he would have material to write from!
He’s still working so I assume being a dick to his employees should keep him well fueled.
Lorelei, yeah being at work still is likely a good thing for him – and your children.
A tip—order a waxing kit off Amazon before they run out. I got mine today NA. It’s easy to do yourself when you are desperate. Mine has little beads that head up and liquify and you don’t even need paper strips.
NA—I hope HG pushes this through as is a link for you. This is a good waxing kit. They will likely sell out I’d imagine.
Wax Warmer, Femiro Hair Removal Home Waxing Kit with 4 Flavors Stripless Hard Wax Beans（14.1oz）20 Wax Applicator Sticks for Full Body, Legs, Face, Eyebrows, Bikini Women Men Painless At Home Waxing https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07JK4C34Y/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_2-mIEb12MZ7YT
Final waxing post. I declare, wax off!
Thanks HG. You don’t want an itchy society.
Lorelei:
I want to hug her and pet her and pat her and SQUEEZE her….
My friend called the other day. Even the cat is suffering from social distancing (there are usually lots of folks for always dinner or gaming, and the cat gets attention from everybody). He held the phone to the cat’s ear, I made my standard inane kitty-petting noises, and the cat scent-marked the phone.
Violetta—she is precious. HG wrote somewhere he can’t stand people that post pictures of cats!
LYSISTRATA—Darling Laconian, Lampito, hail! / How I admire your gleaming gorgeousness, / Your radiant skin, your body sleek and plump. / I bet that you could choke a bull.
LAMPITO—I could. / I’m in such shape I kick my own sweet ass.
CALONICE—(prodding curiously) And what a brace of boobs. How bountiful!
…….
MYRRHINE—(peeking under woman’s clothes) Boetian- sure enough: / Just look at what a broad and fertile plain
CALONICE—(peeking likewise) She’s even pulled the weeds. Now that is class.
Lorelei, my hat goes off to you, and I wish to say a BIG thank you for all you’re doing in the ED and ICU. I was just reflecting today what I would do if hospitals needed more help, if they got inundated and couldn’t fulfil the roles with already trained nurses… hopefully it doesn’t come to that. Stay well 🤞👌
Thank you Narc noob. It is a calm before a storm, no visitors allowed at all so to be honest, it is quiet.
alexissmith2016 I know what you mean. My heart hurts too from all of this. I was being so stoic, happy even, as this hasn’t really affected me much at all. But I let the thoughts sink in about how much people all over are suffering for various reasons in this situation, and I just broke down and cried. It’s pretty overwhelming.
Hi Fox, yes it’s tough. It is perfectly okay for you to be happy. It can be incredibly overwhelming. There is much sadness in the world and we can’t be there to protect everyone. It can be a tough concept to be happy whilst we know others are experiencing pain but it is okay. But there is plenty we can do to help others. It doesn’t have to be huge. Anything at all is welcome I’m sure. Even just shopping for an elderly neighbour. Anything which fits in with your own world. Not Ns though…we don’t need to help Ns just Es and normals hahaha
Oh definitely, I am mindful of the limits of what I can do and do what I can. And don’t worry, I have been reading HG’s work long enough to learn how to spot N’s in my life and cut them off, even if I can’t categorize them that well yet, haha.
I’d like to see the statistical breakdown of “mental health crises” at this time – but we will never get a true picture. Because some of those instances will be true victims breaking under the stress and abuse and other “crises” will look like a similar set of symptoms – but are actually due to a fuel crisis.
Exactly right who cares!
Alexissmith – I already know of a mid-ranger who has had a “breakdown” of sorts because of the “exhaustion” and stress of having to “care” for her elderly relative – but it is because she doesn’t have her empathic sibling at her beck and call to assist her (the Empath does all the actual hands on care and getting stuff done) – but in reality, this mid-ranger is conserving energy because of lack of access to secondary sources (and I am pretty certain her primary source is an UL, therefore, she is already on shaky ground in a lockdown situation.)
Releived to hear the mid is locked down with a mid!
Oh my gosh, imagine if the internet and mobile networks all crashed for a period of time. How would narcy narcs cope then? I mean I’d struggle but I’d endure it knowing that the creatures inside the majority of narcs would be escaping everywhere.
That’s a bit scarier than Covid-19:
“Oh my gosh, imagine if the internet and mobile networks all crashed for a period of time. How would narcy narcs cope then?”
WhoCares, I know you have been here longer then me, just wondering if you know whether that *crisis* is the creature emerging?
We had a special report here down – under about that playing out in the months that follow.
Narc noob,
I would guess that most narcissists are not cognizant of their ‘creature’ – at least in the way that HG is when he writes of it. However, HG has written a very good answer elsewhere of what sorts of things a narcissist in a fuel crisis (or chronic shortage) experiences – can’t remember what thread…perhaps K can find it, if she is reading and has some time.
But I think you would be correct to say that at base; it is the creature emerging.
Thank you for your reply WC.
I know of a LMR (my diagnosis) who went through such a time, they are back to *normal* now but some of that could have been the support (fuel) they tapped into while moving through their crisis.
Hope you are staying healthy!
Narc noob,
My LMRN experienced anxiety and panic attacks towards the end of the formal relationship. I now think these symptoms may have been, in part, due to chronic fuel shortages. Mine is “normal” now; well I think anyway – don’t truly know since I am NC.
Stay safe and healthy too NN!
Whocares, wow, I see. Bizaare! I wasn’t aware you were involved with a LMR. The LMRN I am speaking of (not sure of diagnosis now after i got 22 and 28 in the quiz) is married to an upper lesser and they had to be hospitalized a few times due to severe panic attacks.
What did your EDC reveal, if I may ask?
Narc Noob,
That is curious re: hospitalization for panic attacks.
I don’t mind sharing my EDC results:
Majority: Standard/Carrier
Significant: Super/Magnet
With sprinkles of Codependent-Contagion/Martyr thrown in for fun!
Did you do the EDC? Sorry if you have shared previously and I have missed it.
WC, no, I haven’t done it yet but suspect the same as you, SC with some contagion. A sprinkling of the others also. Thanks for the feed back. 👍
No problem NN. Hope you get a chance to do it!
My EDC results didn’t all make sense to me at first – some of it’s obvious (the Carrier cadre), but I am only now beginning to understand the mix and interactions of traits and what my default behaviours are. I am sure the new detectors that HG now offers, give insight into this interaction.
WC
Yeah!!! And a fascinating mix!!
Renarde,
Yours is a fascinating mix as well. I think the EDC results are of more import when we ‘know’ someone a little bit more – than we can hazard a guess as to whether or not the results matched our thoughts and observations. And sometimes we don’t even know ourselves!
WC
Oh I agree. I’d kind of lost myself these past few years but then I’d argue, I didnt really know who I was to begin with.
The psycho the other day said, what did the little girl inside you want? In that moment I was stumped. I’d already achieved my academic dreams but the real dream was to love, be loved, have children, pets and a garden. Just that.
Renarde,
“I’d already achieved my academic dreams but the real dream was to love, be loved, have children, pets and a garden.”
You deserve that, and more.
WC
Thank you. They’re not grand dreams are they? Just normal.
They’re lovely dreams Renarde and not much for the asking.
I think all I ever actually wanted was to take charge of my own life – the specifics can look different.
And you certainly have done so, WhoCares! Well done. Now what will your new dreams be? I think, with you, the possibilities are endless. Aim high. We will be pulling for you.
FYC, 💙
I have some.
They’re there.
I just need a wee bit more secure footing first.
WhoCares, You’ll find your footing — and then some. Wishing you the very best!
FYC, thank-you 💜.
Your supportive presence and words are greatly appreciated.
To be honest, at this moment, I really can’t explain how pleased I am to just accomplish a grocery run, with child in tow and that’s hoover-free!!
That’s a big accomplishment these days. And all I forgot was lightbulbs. 😁
WhoCares, You have 100% of my support. I want to see you thrive. And, you are so right, a trip to the store with you son (while staying safe and hoover-free) is a major accomplishment these days! I admire the progress you have made; it is a testament to your “commitment vincere vigemusque”. That can be your latin motto! Hugs to you and your son.
WC
That’s true. I’ve had bits from the dream at times but not all together.
Renarde,
You just came out of another ensnarement. Give yourself some time and be kind to yourself ♥️, you’ll find your way. It doesn’t seem like it’s ever a straight trajectory when leaving these experiences behind us but that doesn’t mean we aren’t moving forward.
WC
Thankyou. I wont deny that I am grieving for him.
But, it wasnt real. It was an artifice. He was living in the now and not the future.
He has repaid money but I dont percieve he will pay the full amount.
He will.leach on lathely women then by keeping in with his con.father, he will get the estate.
Judging on the meeting with Dad, he will have a long time to wait.
I dont know about you but I prefer to make my own.
Thank you for thinking of me x
WC & Alexis
So correct. Its heartbreaking.
Spiked increases in domestic abuse cases in China and Italy. It must be hell right now for so many people that it’s a total step backwards in combating against domestic violence. I’m just thinking of all of the children too, I can easily put myself in this situation at age 10 when home life was unbearable. Literally no escape!!I wish I could do something, anything! Women have already lost their lives, I saw 2 women who had been murdered in the news just recently! One by an ex boyfriend and one who murdered his whole family!
If I knew of anyone personally or I was going through it myself right now, I’d go to the local police station and REFUSE to move until they found me somewhere safe. But I get it, the fear, circumstances and financial situations keep you hostage too. It’s so dire right now, it’s upsetting truly.
PV
I hear your words. I percieve you feel as powerless as I do right now.
I was put in mind of HGs writing ‘Trapped in the Car’. Now they are trapped in the home.
The other night a male teacher friend posted the same thing. I explained it in terms of energy.
My god he said, that makes total sense.
Presque Vu,
The stories are upsetting – the lives of others in abuse situations will be collateral damage that no one will be doing a tally of – unlike the Covid-19 deaths.
I spent almost 2 hours, on the phone, the other night talking with a friend about how things are going for me (legal stuff with narc etc.) and she was telling me about a work situation that she recently experienced (upper management narcissist).
I described and talked about HG’s work and how it made such a difference in my life and because of what she recently went through with her co-worker (even though she has been targeted all her life) she was at moment where she was very receptive to understanding more.
I know she’ll follow through on some of my recommendations (publications of HG’s etc.) because it will greatly inform her situation – plus, it will inform her work since she works in a women’s shelter. Maybe the act of sharing knowledge will also help some of clients – or potential clients who call in and don’t know if they should leave etc.
I am glad you are in a position of safety now Presque Vu – unlike during your childhood ❤️
Thank you for advocating my work.
You’re welcome. I do so when I can, this friend knows of your work (through me) but because she has been around abuse victims all her life (plus her own childhood) she had ‘barriers’ but I think after the phone conversation she grasped the accuracy of your work and how it will make further sense of her existing knowledge. Plus, her co-worker situation was pretty painful.
Yes Renarde I do!
Just last night on the regional news I was so upset watching it! 2 charities have seen major spikes in calls and none of them have the capacity to help as it normally would. The advice given was to check in with those you are worried about, ask them how they are daily if possible and let them know you are there to listen. In my head I was like that is NOT enough!! If I suspected anybody I knew to be in trouble they can move into lockdown with me!!
Thank you for your kind words WhoCares, I am safe now but as a child no way! Also for helping your friend and suggesting HG to the women in the refuge. That is really where his expertise and books need to be!! You have HG on your side with the legal stuff with your ex, powerful man to have in your corner when you need him!
I am actually more disturbed by women/men and children being trapped for possible weeks/months than I am of Covid19. Police say they will act on information, but that’s only good if they can escape elsewhere! If I had the money and means I would honestly hand on heart open a sanctuary and a pick up service and remove them ASAP myself!
PV
Totally hear you.
I’m getting increasingly worried for a female friend. Shes married an absolute nutter.
Hazarding…LMV? V because hes hiding under the auspice of Autism. Makes my blood boil. But shes so kind and generous and she explains his behaviour away.
In his pictures he looks brain dead and if he had been properly violent I’m sure she would have bailed. So that excludes all the Ls.
We are due a call. Just not sure the best way to approach this is.
If anyone has any ideas they would be gratefully recieved.
Very many indeed im sure!
I was out with my husband in a late night walk and some guy – a Lee – was also walking And talking very loadly on his mobile. Likely talking loud to get thought fuel at what we’d think of his convo I’m sure.
Anywya he was talking to a friend by the sound of it and all we heard was, “yeah she was going proppa mental mate, I’m telling ya. She started full on attacking me, she was coming on to me like a cage fighter, she’s crazy mate. I just had to get out”.
I wondered whether she was an empath in devaluation and i wanted to go and rescue her. Of course, could have been two narcs colliding also.
I had the weirdest dream this night. I was in a meeting with Ursula von der Leyen regarding the latest developments of Covid-19 and its impact on EU. I said to Ursula that her leadership has significantly improved her personal image in the union and congratulated her on the strategy she chose. And she revealed that the success was due to… her education in narcissism that she received on HG Tudor’s blog. “Taking the narcissistic factor into account I can navigate the corridors of power easily and oursmart many men”. And I whispered: “OMG, you’re one of the women on the blog! Are you NA?” Then my baby started crying and I woke up.
That wasn’t a dream Dolores!
All that’s left to do is make NA confess
That is easy, tickle her feet whilst showing her a picture of Justin T and playing O Canada.
That’s obviously part of her legend. Why would Ursula react to JT and O Canada? Let’s show her the picture of Angela Merkel’s cleavage at Oslo Opera House opening and play “Ich war noch niemals in New York” instead.
Do you mean U. von der Leyen is an empath, HG? If so, why would an empathic woman pursuing a political career would want to have 7 (!) children knowing she hardly has time for any of them?
No, I did not imply that EB. I have not analysed that particular individual, I was focused more on teasing NA with regard to her innate Canadianism.
I understand, HG. Thank you.
You are welcome EB.
Dolores and HG – funny!
(Dolores: what a specific dream.)
Hahahahaha, oh my god…
Would be interesting to know about the powerful women on this blog
Ok…I thought I knew the answer to this but now I am confused. Shelf IPSS – LMR, living with IPPS under quarantine. I think I am white but shelved, a few polite text exchanges over the last week but communication definitely limited compared to pre-lock down. Plus starting to see effects just like HG predicted!! Very smart man indeed!!
Anyway…today I received a social media friend request from someone I don’t know – red flags all over it – clearly staged to get me to bite and accept. I declined. I never get requests from strangers – I’m an introvert and my circles are quite small. LMR and I are not contacts on this platform – he doesn’t use it.
Am I crazy to think that he could be behind this? Would an LMR do this even? Would this be a Hoover and can they even be called that for a shelf IPPS? What would the motivation be – he could have just created a profile and asked to join me….?? Any advice would be appreciated.
1. You are not crazy. It may well be him.
2. Yes an LMR would do this.
3. If it is the narcissist and more information about the circumstances would be needed in order to address this for you in detail, but it is more likely to be the narcissist than not, then yes this is a hoover.
4. Yes this would be done to a Shelf IPSS.
5. The motivation is control by causing you to respond.
HG. LD stated that she is white shelf IPSS and over the last week has had a couple polite texts with her n
If the fb invite was from him why would he need to change the platform if she is replying through texts?
She assumes she is painted white, she may not be, hence the shift in platform.
Thanks HG. Why would being painted black cause a platform shift?
Because you are then viewed through the lens of being painted black, so the alternative platform may be done to appear anonymous and to behave in a malign manner.
Again thanks HG. One more question please. Would the N send an invite on a different platform just to see if the person would interact and how far they would go into it?
Yes.
Having taken the time to read this in depth most of my questions have now been answered.
A very interesting read. Disappointing that very few are likely to experience a fuel crisis. Jees what can we do to make this happen.
Their behavior is amplified tenfold! Pantman has become unbearable! Even though I ignore him whereever possible. I still have to receive the group emails and he is clearly ‘high on fuel’. We all laugh about him behind his back. All of his fuel is borne from sniggers which he believes are people genuinely being interested in what he does and says.
Anyway, this was bloody excellent! Well written, extremely informative and we can all know what to expect.
HG your reference to charitable concerts prompted me to wonder what Bob Geldof is?
Thank you I am pleased you found it informative and interesting.
He is an Irishman.
Bonus fact : one of his names is Zenon.
humph! Having re-read it again, it’s a rubbish article after all!
https://narcsite.com/2019/03/18/the-incredible-sulk-8/
Thanks for the link Lee!
Right, I’m off to cry to my daddy! He will fuel me nicely right now.
Careful what you wish for.
HG the God 💙 I’m kind of depressed about people lately 😢 I’ve been trying to get clothes for a poor mother, for her newborn son. No response on Facebook. Only comments from the borderline retarded. Or people messaging to sell me baby clothes.
It’s not on trend. It’s trendy to fake sympathy for the elderly who can’t buy toilet paper. It’s not on trend to help a baby. Gotta virtue signal and care about whatever is on trend. Don’t worry I will get the clothes.
Whitney, It is most kind of you to reach out on behalf of that mother. If you set up a registry online (with any online storefront) for that woman (and you can do so without and personal details), I would be happy to purchase from the registry if you post the link here. The purchase details stay with the merchant and the recipient receives the gifts. Do be sure to include any sizes needed. Add everything she needs. This way when you ask for help you make it simple for those to do so, especially in times of Shelter-in-Place and COVID19.
That is so sweet of you FYC. I was trying to get second hand clothes for free. There are so many almost brand new baby clothes that people have spare. I don’t know the poor mother, but I saw her asking for free clothes on Gumtree (like Craig’s List).
I’ll go to the salvo second hand store and ask if they can give their clothes donations to her. I’ll find out about charities that could help her. I’ll collect free baby stuff that I see on Gumtree or Facebook or I’ll buy cheap bundles. I already contacted everyone selling bundles of clothes for newborn boys in case they’d like to give to her. One lady responded thank you and she would love to 😊
Whitney, I do not have children which is one reason why buying baby gifts for others so fun. You are correct though, there must be a ton of barely used baby clothes out there. It is just outside of my knowledge/experience base to offer any help in that regard.
That’s so sweet of you FYC 😍 omg some people are so sweet. I need to remember empaths like you and stay away from normal people.
You are very sweet, Whitney. I know what you mean. I have a very small number of truly wonderful empathetic friends and they are an absolute treasure.
For those who have previously expressed burden with being an empath – I get it, I have done so myself. But the current situation with C19 is an example of how we can celebrate the strength and value in it. We must combine our empathic traits with logic in order to effect the greatest (and safest) impact, and when we do, we are a formidable force in bringing comfort to others and balance to the panic and chaos. Whether it be applying ourselves in our jobs on the front lines, reaching out to help neighbours (at a responsible distance of course), or donating to the local animal shelter (that operates on private donation), we can make a huge difference in the course and outcome of situations such as this. We are not weak. We do not do it for notoriety. We do it because it is the essence of who we are, and because the world is a better place when we share our gift of empathy. Our names may never be on a building or in a book because our legacy is different, but we leave one all the same and that’s enough for us.
Beautifully stated, NA. I agree and I practice this regularly as I know you do too.
Hi Whitney, I’m sorry that you didn’t get responses. I think that most people are so overwhelmed right now with all of the uncertainty about their health and finances. I think that most people want to help and do their part to make things better and the trending helping the elderly doesn’t require that much thought right now or imagination as many people promote that need and provide a venue to be able to help or address that need. I try to keep in mind that most people are Normals and so their empathy sometimes have to be directed unlike Empaths where empathy for other people is a natural and automatic response.
Hi Mommypino 💕😍 I didn’t know normals or Narcs existed, before I read HG’s work. I thought everyone was an empath like me. I was confused a lot. I’m still surprised by people. You are right they need their empathy directed. That bothers me because their empathy is merely the parroting of social convention. It always bothered me that people don’t come up with their own ideas, values and opinions.
Whitney 💜, I am exactly the same way. Even in my younger age I used to be frustrated at people around me and I couldn’t understand how they don’t seem to care as much as I do. At times I was even judgmental. At times I felt lonely and different. Then I learned from HG about Normals, Empaths and Narcissists and finally it all makes sense. I now see everything in my world in a more vivid color. I even analyze the different Empaths in my head and their reasons for behaving in a certain way.
From my life experiences, the classmates that I used to judge in my mind as people who do not care actually are capable of caring and they want to help and they genuinely feel good about it. But it’s not the main priority or focus in their lives. It’s more like a cherry on top for them, unlike us where it is our very flavor. I have seen them help people and do good in the years that I have known them but their main focus is really themselves and their immediate families. HG explained it well when he talked about the radius of empathy of Normals versus Empaths.
Those people who are selling baby clothes are not able to give up the potential profit from those clothes and it is their priority. Unlike us where we have a tendency that when we see a need our focus becomes addressing or fixing that need. I think that’s why charitable institutions like ASPCA or St. Jude spend a lot of money for their tearjerker ads because those ads are really meant for the Normals who are majority of the population and they are trying to pull their heartstrings and empathy in order to donate. Just my personal opinion. 💕🌼😘
MommyPino
I agree with your opinion.
They need directions to their empathy.
All so true Mommypino! 💝
Whitney
I feel excactly the same about Normals.
And i did not know about Normals and Narcs eighter before i found HG’s work.
But it is still annoying me.
Especialy these days.
It is a hard pill to swallow.
Iam happy that at least one woman responded!
autieempath thanks for your reply!
I’m usually happy because I’m only friends with Empaths. And everyone is nice to me, in person.
Normals are boring. Why would I talk to someone who only parrots whatever opinion is on trend in society? There’s no point.
Whitney,
Yes! Thats the right way to live your life.
Ditto here.
The only challenge I have right now is not to get annoyed/angry with normals and narcissists when groceries shopping.
They always want to enter my aura.
Hehe autiempath. That is so annoying!!!
I went to a Café last week, right before all the cafes closed for Covid.
Not many people were out, but anyone who came to this large café had to sit at the closest table. WTF. I literally moved 3 times.
I always moved away from Normals before Covid-19 too. If it’s not possible to move, (in emergency) you can listen to loud music so you don’t have to hear their conversation.
I traveled by myself last year and it was the most tranquil and relaxing time of my whole life (being alone). Except people wanted to talk to me. Good to have earphones in but that didn’t stop them.
Also at Doctors (the chairs were spaced apart in a large room- social distancing), the Normals sat close as possible. I had to move twice.
Big bummer!
Nothing will stop the Narcissist, not even Covid.
That’s unfair to the borderline retarded.
What you’re dealing with is ignorant people. They choose to be that way
Violetta, you are so eloquent and intelligent. I hope you never in your life are exposed to a standard sample of the general population.
Whitney:
Too late.
“Gotta virtue signal and care about whatever is on trend.”
I love that line, Whitney.
I won’t worry. I trust you will!
Thank you Lisk!! 😄
Empty here, too. Though not always. Just no soap, lol.
Are you getting panicky about supply of fuel sources, when everyone locked up at home?
Read the book, the answer is in there.
Bloody excellent! Just purchased! Everyone should read so they know what to expect! From a quick skim through (as too excited to wait), I may have a couple of follow-up questions later-on if i may.
Hi H.G, good evening, a question, why does a Lesser make a friend request to me at FB at this time if we have been seeing us for 9 months … right now he decides to “call me” to enter his FB? Maybe for the moment “Coronavirus” or something else … Thank you!
Hello Elmindreda. I need more context. When you state “seeing us” do you mean
1. You are dating
2. You are in a relationship you would regard as boyfriend and girlfriend
3. You are just friends.
The status of the existing relationship is relevant to this act of making the friend request. To enable me to receive this information, I recommend that you organise an email consultation so I can have more information from you and give you an accurate response.
Hello H.G!!! seriously? He is a Lesser, I am not going to spend a penny on that guy, someday I will ask you for a consultation but in general “something theoretical” because reading you is a pleasure, but when my English improves. Thanks anyway, in case you can clarify something for me, I have been an IPSS for 9 months.
You are spending it on you, not him.
HG. Good afternoon, I pay the Kindle membership just to read your books, I bought the publication of the Coronavirus, etc, because that is for me, but for the specific curiosity of a minor who I do not care about more than sex and satisfy my narcissistic part , will not spend a penny. One day I will ask you for a consultation, but to speak in general, I grew up among narcissists and all my partners have been, it is like having an album full of cards, so the subject is exciting for me. Thanks again 😉🍀
You are welcome.
That last toilet roll one was funny 😆.
It’s a very good read . It answered my latests questions. Well done
Thank you SofL.
HG?
So, the exnarc lives in one of the more affected places of the fxxx eu and works in one of the more infected countries. Can I ask him how he and his poor partner are doing?
Matrinarc as concerned and empathic as always. Not even trying to pretend.
No, that is a breach of no contact.
Ok, thought so …… thank you.
OMG I am soooo glad to be where I am and not locked up with the exnarc.
Am very concerned about partners and children of narcs and other abusive individuals, who are locked up with them.
I still think UK only country that hasn’t lost its mind.
Tell that to the empty shelves.
I’ve noticed lots of lesser and Midrange Ns criticizing people for stockpiling. Would I be correct in my guess that they are the worst stockpilers!
Indeed in terms of individual behaviour. Collectively, it is the misguided normals exhibiting the herd mentality.
“Misguided normals”
This is the third or fourth time I am reading this term in the past few days.
Is this a new or old term? Do you outline or describe this category of being anywhere?
It is something I have referred to in the past.
It is a normal who is influenced by the narcissistic narrative. They are not a narcissist, but they behave in a narcissistic manner owing to the relevant factors of being a normal which are expanded on in Understanding Emotional Empathy and the Empathy Cake.
What if he dies and I don’t know?
One less narcissist troubling you.
But I wouldn’t know that he was no concern anymore …
If you impose no contact the narcissist cannot be a sizeable concern to you anymore, therefore you need to know whether the narcissist is alive or dead. You control that which you can control – you.
I find it so interesting HG,
that countries with seemingly non-narc prime ministers (at least: looking humble on photos) like Italy, Norway, Sweden, have waited long to take drastic measure on citizens. Investing and weighing.
This has made me wonder whether nationwide lockdown really is good.
Hello Cat, I would suggest that you are right to wonder.
Cat,
It is refreshing to see more people wondering.
I would also add that a “real” leader (narc or not) would be responsive rather than be reactive to political and public (especially social media) pressure and would weigh all considerations (health, economic, moral) carefully before taking drastic measures, or before NOT taken drastic measures and instead letting things ride out after doing level-headed cost-benefit analyses.
I wonder if WWII was the last time we had “real” leaders (narc or not Narc). It was pre-television back then . . . .
@lisk
yes and though sometimes narcissist boss drastic measure can be called for, these totalitarian moves about No meeting with more than 2 ppl, seem just weird.
Italians, Spanish and French often live in the same household as granddad. The unknowing younger inevitably infecting the elders.
For the rest of us It’s just a cancellation of those monthly or weekly meetings with the elders. And prohibited visiting this spring at elders grouphomes.
Not allowing citizens to meet ppl at all is just over the top.
No, I am not. But I see why you might think so.
You certainly don’t need to prove anything to me.
My main impetus for responding to you was my strong belief that it is important to give people space to be who they are before reminding them how to behave, especially since, overall, people seem to be mellow even if slightly frustrated right now.
Yes, the narcs are coming out of the woodwork. I find it fun and fortunate to have that narc vision (thanks, HG) to suspect it or to even see it so clearly.
You are welcome.
Oops…can you move this down HG? This was meant to be in response to Renarde’s post talking about waiting for EDC results.
I cannot move the placing of comments, Lisk.
Got it.
Splendid.
lisk
Indeed they are. I recieved a female, platonic, hoover the other night after being quiet for weeks.
This was very helpful!
Thank you AE.
Fantastic book HG – answered a good number of questions. Worth every cent – everyone should read it.
I have one more – I notice the events of late are driving an increase in the daily anxiety of both myself and other empaths I know. How do the mid-rangers respond to increasing anxiety in their empaths?
Thank you LD.
It depends how that anxiety is directed with regard to the Mid-Ranger. If it can be harnessed as fuel as part of asserting control, it will be. If it challenges the narcissist, then expect it to be ridiculed, dismissed and poured scorn on.
I miss windstorm, twilight, etc.
They still read.
SO THE FUCK DO I.
They’re Contagions also and I imagine they are holed up , staying focused on holding the OM for the world lol
Strongerwendyme, Given the greater sensitivity and empathy of Twilight and Windstorm, it is no wonder they do not often enter the fray, as surely there would be fallout. I hope both are well and I value their sensitive insight as contagions as well.
Yes, tough time right now if you have any of the contagion trait.
Indeed, and I knew that you were referring to the school of empath.
And I wasnt being facetious re: covid. I meant the empathetic contagion trait.
My ED revealed me to be majority Contagion
(Saviour majority cadre)
It is a wild ride right now
I also don’t need much sleep weirdly
I used to sleep too much now I’m sleeping about 5 hours per night on average
Hi WokeAF, Weren’t you a Standard Magnet? Did you re-do your ED?
When I first consulted with HG it was before the narc detector test was developed.
I consulted with him mainly about my narc, and did not speak a lot about myself. He had said at the time that I was likely standard, and I guess from whatever I had said I had come off as a magnet. That sounded about right to me.
So I did the test, expecting there to be a high contagion element as I’ve come to understand what contagion is and recognise myself. The result was majority Contagion.
Got it, thanks for clarifying. I have been wondering if my results would be the same if I retake it. When I looked back at my submission, I realized that I accidentally skipped answering one question because I was trying to make the answers fit in the maximum words allowed so I have been editing my answers and forgot to paste one back to that question. I also felt that I didn’t really understand some of the questions and wasn’t very satisfied with some of the answers that I gave. But it’s not that important for me as I still believe that I am an Empath and the people closest to me doesn’t think that I’m a abusive narcissist in any way.
To clarify: I didn’t retake the ED.
This was my one & only ED.
I think it’s best we trust the ED we do take. I suspect HG factored in all sorts of things including not having enough space , not having the “perfect” answers etc
I just realized I wrote “no protector “in the place of “empath detector “twice in my previous comment
OH MY FUCK autocorrect!!!
Arrrgpppft. You know what I’m saying
One thing that has kept me away from social media and opinions in new reports is the overwhelming sense of entitlement people are expressing. I get that people are scared and need to express their fears and want to talk about their opinions but lately all I’ve read from the general public is criticism. Governments across the world are offering trillions of dollars to help aid families, businesses and health care facilities and people are complaining it’s not good enough. People are acting like they are entitled to a free ride through all of this. Things like toilet paper, take out food and yes, even some of HGs assistance, is a luxury. We still have to pay for them.
OMG the entitlement, yes, also to tell everyone what to think and do. And like they are the only affected ones.
Entitlement is such a big problem. I am very worried at my home country right now and my family and friends over there. I think that they’re all screwed. They are in such a poor country that has very limited resources and test kits. And then there are these politicians there who used the test kits and had all of their family members and friends use the test kits even though they didn’t have symptoms and were not exposed. Some of them were even threatening to fire the laboratory people if they don’t prioritize reading their test results over other people who are not VIPs. So the lab people had to prioritize reading their tests over the people who are really showing symptoms and are in the ICU. Compare that to the narc leaders in the Western world like Trudeau and Cuomo who still hasn’t had themselves tested because they didn’t want to waste a test because they are not showing any symptoms. Even Trump wasn’t going to have himself tested until he got called selfish because he was exposed to the delegates from Brazil who tested positive.
Similar attitudes were apparent here in my community when in our Covid19 support forum several women shared stories on why they think they already have the virus and they were denied test kits because they didn’t qualify. I actually used Trudeau as an example and I said in the nicest way that I could that if they still believe that they have it even though they didn’t qualify for a test, they should follow their instincts and self isolate as an extra precaution. But before that they were all frustrated at how they were not tested even though they had symptoms. Statistics show that in last week’s testings only one out one ten came out as positive. So those nine people who qualified for the test didn’t have the virus.
Ok has Trudeau received his HG stamp yet! I missed it if so. If so, school?
Hi WokeAF, I don’t think he has. It was just me giving a lazy assumption that successful politicians are more likely to be narcissists. But now that I am giving it more thought, I don’t think that Cuomo is a narc. But I could be wrong. My guess is Trudeau is an UMR.
I cannot figure out the look into Trudeau’s eyes.
He also has a funny sound to his voice when he gives speeches.
If he is a narc, I think maybe he would be a LG or MG.
“ Trudeau and Cuomo who still hasn’t had themselves tested because they didn’t want to waste a test because they are not showing any symptoms”
pretty sure either Trudeau was tested on the DL or isn’t testing bc he likely has it and that wouldn’t go over well with the public
I have seen his interview where he explained that he didn’t want to use up a test kit that other people need especially since he doesn’t have any symptoms so he is just self isolating.
Yes MP, I know. I suspect that is a lie.
Oh they sure as hell have him isolated, but that he HAS indeedily doodlily been tested
but what I suspect is irrelevant and whether or not he has been tested is irrelevant
Woke
Ah. I understand what you’re getting at now. I wrote that in the case that there were those who do not know his status or that he has been isolating. Not sure the point of a test if he has no symptoms and is isolated. Would think it a waste of a test when they’re needed for others.
WokeAF, personally I was wondering what if Trudeau got tested and he was negative and that could make people think that he’s not really all that intimate with his wife. They have this facade of being the perfect couple but who knows what goes on behind closed doors. But that’s just me speculating and I am biased because I have always suspected that he’s not authentic even before I learned about narcissism.
Trudeau sounds like Dr. Nuwan.
I am beginning to think that Dr Nuwan may need his own stand alone series.
He does!
I want to play Cat Astrofy in the cartoon version!
It has been reported for some time now that Trudeau has not been tested because he is in good health and has no symptoms, but has been self-isolating since his wife first showed signs, during the period while she was awaiting her test results, and continues since she has tested positive.
Yes NA I know.
That is not the feeling I have but my feeling or if he’s tested is irrelevant ultimately
MommyPino, the test were a big talking point here too. I got horribly sick a few weeks ago with fever shortness of breath and exhaustion. I went to the doctor to be safe. They didn’t test me and I got the feeling they wanted to but couldn’t because I hadn’t traveled. I was too sick to care at that time. They sent me home and said I could go back to work 24 hours after the fever broke. Once the fever broke I realized I have no idea what I had and now I’m going back in public with a cough possibly infecting my coworkers. Here’s the kicker though. The people in authority put that burden on me. The doctors did what they were authorized to do by the health department. My employment required a doctor’s release for me to come back (which they’ve never done). Both doctor and employer covered their ass and Im left with the guilt of infecting others. This all happened days before the government finally started taking it seriously and shutting businesses down. Now I think people can stay home if they have symptoms without worrying about repercussions from their employer. It’s a mess. I think the test are the least of our worries though. They’ve got to get these hospitals ready with equipment.
I’m sorry to hear about your family. I worry too about the people in poor countries. They are the ones that will suffer the most.
Thanks for that perspective Mercy. They were probably just annoyed at the situation as well and the uncertainty if they were unknowingly infecting people. I got annoyed at the tone of frustration from them with being unhappy with the medical personnel not doing enough. They have to follow guidelines on who to test or not. I agree that it is a big mess and I don’t think that anybody was ready for this.
Thanks, I am praying for them. I have been talking to them checking if they have supplies and food while they are home bound and so far they say they have plenty. But they are very frustrated and worried too.
MommyPino, I agree with what you say about the tone of people. I feel like the government is doing everything they can in my state. They are moving forward and addressing people’s concerns. It seems like every time they implement a new program to assist there’s a group of people that will never be happy. Socal media is all about “what are you going to do about this or that”. It’s expected. None of us are going to get through this without discomfort. I read something last night. “Is the US finally humbled?” According to comments on social media, No
Mercy, I agree. Africa, for example only has a small number of cases but due to lack of proper health care, their death rate as of a couple of days ago was 50%. We all need a solution. I am hoping they approve more accurate testing, and an antibody test so we can know if what we had was Covid19. I also hope they make progress quickly since the virus has already mutated and is of the rapidly mutating variety. We need to get a handle on this well before the second wave hits (likely in the fall) as the second wave of a virus is historically much worse than the first wave. Not to mention what this will do to peoples lives from the economic effects.
Many people from countries like that are not even paycheck to paycheck. They get daily wages and the wage that they earn today will be spent for food and utilities tomorrow. So it isn’t possible for many them to stock up or not work. The saving grace though is that normally in poor countries like that family ties are very strong. For example in my family, the ones who own a farm was able to give those of our relatives who are living day to day wages sacks of rice and salt so that at least they can still eat rice if everything else runs out.
Hi MP, I have friends in Africa (expats) and they are not currently at risk, but for local tribes, they are at risk in some countries in the continent and this is very challenging. Regardless of family, or any other factor for that matter, they are at risk due to density and lack of resources. So far, it is not too bad in terms of percentages. Most countries are in lock down so this will go a long way towards protection against the virus, but will be damaging to their economy and ability to earn wages. I can only hope for the best for all, including you and you family, MP.
Thank you FYC and I hope that you stay safe as well and also your family and friends.
FYC—I’ve read nothing intelligent in a few days on the subject, but these considerations of the mutation capacity are of concern, but will the vaccine (that will be released likely) or prior infection offer some resistance. Yes. But how much? Hard to say. We can’t know, only predict.
Thank you for that input, Lorelei. Do keep us informed with your insider views.
Lorelei, well said, thank you.
Mutators gonna mutate.
Just like they have been doing for millennia . . .
Very good.
FYC, I’ve heard that if the virus mutates it will be deadlier. I did not know it has already happened. I vaguely remember reading something about a different strain in China. Now I’m curious how the mutation process happens. So an antibody test would tell us if we had the virus? If that’s the case, its good to know. I would like to know if I had it and if I’ve built any immunity.
My dad was in Mexico through the winter and wasn’t supposed to come back until end of April. I struggled not knowing if I should get him back now or wait. They don’t have a lot of cases so my thought was he is safer there. In the end I decided to bring him home. Im worried for his friends there because their health systems are less prepared than we are.
What are your thoughts on Trump considering lifting restrictions? Economically I get it. I just think it’s the wrong answer right now.
Hi Mercy, I understand your concerns. Okay, I am a bit of a nerd and I love to process various data. So over the past view days I have read a lot about the virus and historical pandemics and economic effects. I have created a model in my head of likely scenarios. But, here are the facts that I find merit in:
1) The virus is of the highly mutating variety
2) Virologist have said the virus has already mutated (subtypes L and S)
3) Pandemics usually present in waves of 3; we are experiencing the first wave
4) Self-test kits are likely to have a reasonable rate of false negatives for several reasons
5) Self distancing is the only way to avoid infection in the absence of a vaccine
6) Theraputic care will stem the death rate and is improving
7) A vaccine will be a game changer
Yes, an antibody test will tell you if you have been exposed to the virus and as a result, have developed antibodies. Some develop more effective antibodies than others.
I do not want to be indelicate, I am in a high risk group currently because I have had back to back pneumonia episodes this winter, but the fact remains that there are some that will succumb regardless of any efforts. There will be no perfect effort. But, to answer your question directly, if Trump lifts restrictions too soon, the damping effect will not be achieved and we will likely be primed for a greater second wave, based upon historical pandemic data. That said, Trump has to ride a razor’s edge between the greater good–a balance between those at risk, and the health of the economy. Not an enviable task for anyone. I have no way of knowing where this will go, but for me, I will take precautions and carry on with life. I am a person of gratitude and I am okay with any sacrifice. We have to keep the economy afloat for the well being of all and we need to respect and preserve life in all ways we can. I am as curious as you in finding out where all this ends up.
FYC, I love that you are a self proclaimed nerd haha. My oldest daughter is too and she’s pretty awesome.
Once again you’ve given me alot to think about. The L and S are what I told you I read about. I didn’t put much thought into it until you talked about mutating. I read that it is mutating at a slow rate so this is a good thing, yes? I didn’t know that pandemics come in waves of three. Would that mean that L and S are two waves? If that is the case are we currently experiencing the deadlier wave?
After reading last night I understand that testing is more important to scientist and doctors than it is for us right now. The scientist are collecting data to understand it’s behavior. For us the most importantly thing is avoiding infection.
I knew that you had pneumonia this last winter but I did not realize it was back to back. I love your attitude of taking precautions and carrying on. I know I don’t have to tell you this but it makes me feel better saying it, please take care of yourself. I think about the people I have made friends with here and it’s hard not to be able to shoot them a text asking how they are doing. I hope we all keep each other informed on our well being.
I agree with you about making decisions to find a balance of saving lives and saving the economy. My fear is that there will be no balance and that big risks will be taken. I’m afraid he will go all in on one side or the other. Time will tell though. I have a feeling that the virus will be the one that ultimately makes that decision. How would you like to be a narcissist trying to assert control over a deadly virus? I think he’s met his match.
Do you have thoughts on the vaccine they started trying on the 16th? If I’m not mistaken, this is the first time they have recreated a virus with synthetics in order to produce a vaccine. Thanks to our conversation I can turn my focus to the cure now instead of the dread im reading in the news.
Thank you Mercy, you are most kind. I will be fine and I do take good care of myself. This was an anomaly due to a confluence of events and one I hope not to repeat! Honestly though, I think indirectly Zero Impact (with regard to the first case) will eliminate that from happening again. I’ll reply later to your Covid19 Qs as this will take some time to do it justice.
FYC, I cant comment of Knowing HG at all. I don’t know how to fix it!! If I delete my account I cant recreate it with my email for 30 days. I might cry over this.
Mercy, do not delete your account. What device are you using? We can solve this! No worries.
FYC,
Cancel the drama, I was able to get through. When you get a chance, go take a look.
Mercy, Here is what I have found to date and hopefully its answers some of your questions:
1) Covid19 is a *novel* virus which means it is a totally new variation in the coronavirus family not seen before and it possess unique protein structures. There is debate among those reporting as to the speed with which it mutates.
2) L & S, do not represent the waves, they represent different strains (created by mutation) of this RNA type virus and were originally reported by Chinese scientists who noted that the type L was noted first and the type S appeared later (within the span of 30-60 days). They made the assumption that type S was more aggressive, but this has not been studied nor supported by other scientists.
3) Waves of pandemic are the natural cycles of infection by a virus attempting to survive. The only way to irradiate a virus it to completely eliminate any available hosts. Since this will not happen (this virus is zoonotic and can transfer to animals (usually bats, chickens or pigs in origin, not pets.
The 1918 flu’s first outbreak was in march. People thought the worst was over and went back to their normal lives. The virus resurged in the fall and the second wave was more deadly than the first, not so much due to mutation, but due to the fact that people were not taking the same precautions and it spread rapidly.
4) Accurate testing helps in several ways: a) it helps the person know if they have Covid19 or the flu or neither and leads to better medical advice for the patient, b)knowing if they are infected hopefully would mean they will remain quarantined until they no longer shed the virus, c) gives peace of mind and reduces panic, d) helps scientists gather important data for their virus prediction models. One thing that is not discussed much, especially with self-testing, is the inevitable false negatives (far more common than false positives – you are tested 2x if you test positive for verification). So testing does not eliminate the potential for spreaders.
5) There are all kinds of things in life we need to balance for a favorable existence, the two most important would be our health and our ability to provide for our survival. So we are talking the balance between protection (total social isolation) and economic survival (non-total isolation). I would predict both will suffer no matter what decision is made.
6. I do not worry Trump will make sweeping capricious decisions, there is too much potential fallout in an election year (and I am sure Trump is keenly focused on winning). So how might he try to assert control over a deadly virus? I think for a narcissist, things actually become easier. He is not burdened by empathy and whole object consistency. I would guess as a ULN, Trump will do what serves him with the least blowback in black and white fashion: Virus (black), spreaders (black), testing (white), social isolation (white), scientists willing to provide a solution (white), scientists who say we need to isolate until we know more (black), economy destruction (black, black, black), Hydroxychloroquine + Azythromycin (white), vaccine (white) unemployment (black). He will navigate these black and white factors against any potential win or loss du jour. Factors will remain fluid because he will react to the market and public approval numbers and the polls and they change. HG, please enlighten me if this is not correct.
7. As for a vaccine, the Mayo Clinic reported today that efforts are progressing for a Covid19 vaccine, but it is still likely not to be complete for another 12-18 months. That’s not to say there will not be trials before that time, but it takes time to make an effective vaccine (natural or synthetic and either could be effective). The antimalarial drugs chloroquine and hydroxychloroquine, as well as the HIV drugs lopinavir and ritonavir, all carry a known or possible risk of drug-induced ventricular arrhythmias and sudden cardiac death especially in those with pre-existing heart arrythmias. Other predisposing factors to death are advance age and blood clotting disorders.
“The people in authority put that burden on me.”
I commend “the people in authority” for respecting your right to self-responsibility, which comes with costs, including guilt, depending upon how you wield it.
Perish the thought that “people in authority” should be responsible for you!
. . . especially because that’s the kind of thinking that allows narcs into our lives.
That’s a pretty thought lisk, and I’d like to think that you’re right but, unfortunately I live in the real world when things like having a job matter. They weren’t respecting my self- responsibility, they wanted me to get back and help them meet their deadline.
I actually asked HG many questions about the narcissistic dynamic in relation to COVID just a few days ago, and he came back very quickly with all the answers in this book. As a truth seeking empath, $10 is nothing if it keeps me safe during this crisis. I feel it is more critical than ever to have my logic defences in place in order to protect my energy so I can take care of me and my kiddos.
Thank you HG!
You are welcome TH.
There is talk on here of a COVID “book?” You wrote one this quickly? Where is this?
It is in the knowledge vault.
https://gum.co/OqStj
HG, there is something not right with gumroad accepting my payments. It is not me, it was an issue yesterday as if an alien has taken over. I was able to access paypal but things spun around crazy on a screen and nothing happened. I then went to another computer and tried the link again, and it is saying it won’t process my card. I changed the selected card within Paypal just to see what would happen. Same. It will prompt me to manually enter a credit card number which I am not pleased to do. I have had successful transactions with gumroad previously. Is this the first issue you have heard? I don’t want to be a pest each time I want something. Every other time is fine, but each time is a bit much.
It is the first time I have been notified of those specific issues Lorelei. Other payments were processed without difficulty. Others may have had a similar issue to me although they did not inform me of it. If you experience difficulties it is best to email me about it and a solution can be found.
Great comment… I need to get this tomorrow!
Wow, that was a lot more than I was expecting! A lot of bang for your buck on this one.
HG,
Do you think this crisis is enough of a shift that it could eradicate narcissism? Like people are going to learn very quickly that ego and control will not get them very far anymore.
Or am I just being an optimistic empath?
You said before that you have seen the future, was it anything like this???
Keep well everyone💕
“The meek shall inherit the earth.”
No, it will not. Narcissism is not a decision, it is an ingrained self-defence mechanism, TH. You are of course demonstrating The Eternal Optimism of the Empathic Mind.
The meek already have inherited the earth and look what they’ve done with it!
I was looking forward to this in particular and am impressed and delighted to see that you delivered a book. It is an excellent read! Thank you very much for providing comprehensive, detailed and helpful information on this pressing issue, HG.
You are welcome LS, I’m pleased you enjoyed it.
Hi,
I have been reading your work for two years now and have been able to regain my sanity and sense of who I am. Thank you HG for that!
I am still living with the narcissist as I am not yet convinced that a separation is better for the kids as they would be living with him alone every other week in that case. So it is quite interesting to observe the narc in this situation. As he is a big time victim narcissist with OCD/hypocondria as one of his defense mechanisms, this is a perfect time for him to gain attention for each imagined little symptom. Fortunately he has to go to work so we have time off from him during the workdays. I can only imagine the agony of being locked in with a narc day in and day out. Much strength and love to those who are in that situation! 💪❤️
Hello Ann and welcome. I am pleased that you have been able to regain your sanity. Your stance of remaining with the narcissist is a product of emotional thinking and you should apply GOSO. If you require assistance with that, do organise an audio consultation and utilise the assistance package, How To CoParent With the Narcissist.
How many pages is it?
It tells you on Gumroad.
Also is the toiletpaper19 code stop going bc ONCE AGAIN there’s no code option. Gumroad hates me
It is there but not for this product
Drat. Ok thx HG Xx
Don’t feel bad. I couldn’t even find gumroad without HG’s help.
This is my brain on self-quarantine. Any questions?
https://i1.wp.com/lolzombie.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/brain-drugs-bacon.jpg?resize=600%2C815&ssl=1
Yay!
Also HG I cannot find Zero Impact package on gumroad , is it there? Maybe it’s cuz me and Gumroad aren’t on good terms right now I don’t know why
It is there as advised by email.
HG. excellent material. Well defined and explained. Thank you
Thank you Kim.
Love this HG thank you! My LMR is defensive angry and doesn’t care at all – went golfing last weekend…and didn’t care until lockdown. And then he hates it and me and is in basement. And said he get the virus and give it to me – yet now says he never said it. Gaslighting at its finest! I’m going to do narc detector to see what he truly is as he’s acting very Lesser. Banging things angry…
Wise move.
Charlene
Be very careful. Very.
Can you pack what’s known as a ‘bug out bag’ and keep it safe and hidden?
Please keep safe x
what is wrong with golfing? Not like u touch anything or anyone?
He doesn’t tell me where he is and abandons me constantly using golf as his scapegoat – most of the time never comes home after and stays out all night. And there’s contact on the course they are usually a foursome. Plus we are in a state where only necessary is allowed and golf isn’t necessary when all are supposed to be in quarantine. The rules done apply to him –
I was getting nervous, I thought you were future faking us all. I just purchased it and cannot wait to read it!!!
I don’t do that to my readers. Sometimes work takes longer to appear because of professional obligations I have but they will all appear in time.
Sorry Mr. Tudor, I was trying to be funny. I guess I am not a comedian.
I understood you were joking Leigh, but it’s important to be clear about such matters also.
I just finished reading it and it was extremely informative. This is something we all needed to be aware of and you armed us with knowledge. Thank you! If you ask me, $10 was a bargain.
Thank you LW17 I am pleased you found it informative
I enjoy and respect the work you do and the free content provided.
Is it acceptable to try and charge people at this point in time when their way of life is teetering on the edge.
You may find that by being altruistic now may pay dividends later.
If you are a Greater then surely you would know this?
Huge back lash in the UK at people who seem to be profiteering on the back of others misfortune.
No point in pleading to your sensitive side is there? You don’t have one.
Hello Amanda,
Thank you for your observation and I am pleased you enjoy my work.
Yes, it is acceptable. Here is why :-
1. I am an expert, expertise comes with a cost. No doctor, lawyer, architect, welder, scientist, bricklayer, designer, provides their expertise for free do they? Why then should I?
2. You recognise I provide free content. Are you aware that I have written more free material than material which attracts a fee? The ratio is approximately 70%/30% based on words written.
3. Are you aware that I have addressed over 35 000 questions/comments on this blog without charge?
4. Are you aware that I have moderated nearly 300 000 comments on this blog without charge?
5. Are you aware that I have answered many emails when people ask a one-off question, without charge?
6. Are you aware that I have created hundreds of videos at no charge?
7. Are you aware I have undertaken Livestream Q&As at no charge?
8. Are you aware I have given numerous interviews wherein I have answered many questions, without charge.
9. This is my work. This is my effort. There is no profiteering. I am not stockpiling items and selling them on at a premium. I am creating solid, practical advice, answering questions, helping individuals understand the risks to them caused by Covid-19 and for a cost of just US $10.
I would add:
HG provided both free and paid material BEFORE Covid and is continuing to do so. He did not just suddenly start offering only paid material after the outbreak AND he has offered discounts on paid material during this time. It’s business as usual here as it is anywhere else services are still being offered. I went to the grocers and they were not giving away groceries for free, the drug store still charged me for toilet paper, and the gas stations are still charging to fill your tank. Essential needs but still with a cost. HG’s work is, and has been, considered essential to many in their healing, but not all of those people paid for material. The choice is yours as to what level of detail or information you want (free or paid), and as is the case anywhere, you should expect to pay for detailed or customized work. Some of the paid material is general interest and entertainment (not considered essential to recovery of narc abuse) and so I expect to pay for that just as I do when I get books from Kobo or Amazon. Sure, I could make do with whatever is free from the local library for my reading pleasure, but I also have the freedom of choice to obtaining the specific information from the source of my choosing for a fee. I choose here because the information is unrivalled and it is always my choice what level I choose and whether or not I pay.
Well articulated NA.
Speaking of which, what is the code for the 50% discount that you mentioned in your reply to my email, please?
HG, I admit to reading the Daily Mail, to a large degree because they post info about the US issues that US news sites won’t (i.e., a lone terrorist attack at a Midwest university–DM had name and origin of attacker long before US sites released even the number of alleged attackers). However, I am not shilling for a job there. I could not possibly get a job with DailyMail:
A) My grammar isn’t bad enough;
B) They already banned one account because I was posting quotes from “Dr. Tran” under pro-Meghan comments and people complained, so I had to open another.
Replied by email.
HG
Thank you. Reading this thread further, I was reminded of the following:
When several people make a comment or respond to that of another, they may all be doing so at the same time (unbeknownst to each other) and have no idea if anyone else has responded, or in what way they have responded (agree or disagree) until the comments are moderated and appear. There is no contacting others with the intent to “mob” or to form a majority. Just different people offering their view, which may, or may not, be in agreement with the original stance.
No one is forced to change their stance or adopt that of others, and numbers in or out of agreement is really irrelevant. There are many people reading and not commenting, so we are only getting the opinion of those few who choose to make theirs known and that may annoy some people, but that is a personal issue and for them to contemplate why. There will be like-minded people on both sides of any issue or point of discussion, but there are no “winners” or “losers” The point is that they can all be made. It makes for better conversation if people can articulate why they feel a certain way because that may assist with helping others to see another point of view, which is rather the point of exchanging views.
At least that is my view.
Indeed, NA.
Yes HG,
Hello, I know you answer for free, as well as give good solid advice. About 2-years ago you were instrumental in assisting me prior to, during and after my divorce to a mid-range narcissistic sociopath. I went SuperNova (and as I even type the word I’m truly triggered), I am happy to report it took awhile to return back to myself (or rather a better version).
I admit I was wondering how pathetic my X must be right now with the stock market crashing. His wealth has surely significantly dwindled, the only thing important to him. I also chuckle even more because he retired at the first of the year. Oops horrible timing.
At any rate, I urge all suffers to soak up what HG has to offer (free or not). I am ‘living’ proof it will save your life.
Thanks,
SuperEmpath
Thank you SE and I am pleased to see that you have moved forward and made progress. Thank you for updating us.
LOL
Amanda, I appreciate your respect for HG’s works, but I am troubled by the tone and content of your point of view that follows. Because this comes up repeatedly on the blog, I hope you do not mind that I address my concerns here.
Are you aware that in addition to what HG and NA have identified below, that:
HG has a full time job away from the blog?
HG pays all expenses for this blog and these are quite significant?
HG donates countess hours of his time for those in need on a regular basis?
HG matches most Angel Assistance Fund donations?
HG is assisting all of us with free content at a time when it is needed most, and paid content at prices you cannot find elsewhere. I have not seen any therapist or psych website offering free counsel due to COVID19.
HG is a psychopathic narcissist, and yet he makes decisions contrary to that orientation on a regular basis. There is ample evidence of this. So do you judge a person based upon a psychological defense that was not of their conscious choosing? Or do you judge a person based upon their choices and actions? When people expect someone to give all of their money and time away to others, narcissist or not, which person is behaving more entitled? Is it the narcissist or the person demanding anything they want or need to be free and throwing barbs while making such demands?
Amanda, I am truly sorry if you are personally experiencing pain during the COVID19 crisis. I hope you are well. I would like to suggest something radical in counter to your feelings of frustration. Try gratitude. I say this not to be trite, but because it will empower you and change your perspective. Take stock of all you have versus all you do not. With regard to this site, make use of all that is free. If you reach a roadblock ask for help instead of offering criticism and sarcasm. We are here to help–for free. This is a community of caring, intelligent people who have all been touched in some way by narcissism. Put forth your concern and you will find the care you claim to seek. No one here is taking advantage of anyone. Least of all HG.
Really Amanda? Of course you enjoy & respect Tudors work….as long as it’s free. So Tudor charges us 10$ so that we have support and enlightenment, guidance and (could go on and on)..but you want it for free so that Tudor can continue to support himself financially why you read for free? Profiteering? Earning a living is profiteering in your eyes? You criticize Tudor, question Tudors motive? You ask If it’s acceptable to charge people at this time when their lives are “teetering on the edge” ….ask yourself if it is acceptable to judge and to insult someone (“No point in pleading to your sensitive side is there? You don’t have one.”) while lives are teetering on the edge? Be mindful of what Tudor is providing us at his own cost, time and effort. Ask yourself if it is the “right time” to stop judging. And if you can’t stop judging, then stop reading for free.
Be well & heal
Be kind.
Stay safe
Well stated. It is often the case that such individuals are hypocritical. They are perfectly happy to read what I write, digest it and use it but if they are asked (not compelled) to pay a small sum for it, all of a sudden I am a terrible person. Actually, I am a terrible person and a wonderful person, but they always forget about how terrible I am when the material is free and then remember it when they are asked to pay. They are a very small number though.
People get mean on here occasionally though. That amanda girl only made one wrong comment, and a whole mob takes her out. It’s nastiness.
Hi Anm, it is not nastiness. When will people understand this?
1. Amanda expressed her opinion. It was ill-founded for reasons I explained using evidence.
2. Other people are also allowed to express their opinion, they did so. Is nobody allowed to respond? Is nobody else allowed to express their opinion?
“The whole mob takes her out” – which mob? At most five people, including me, countered her opinion. That is not a mob.
“It´s nastiness.” Where? Disagreement is not nastiness. This is nasty “Amanda, you are a fucking idiot writing that. I bet you are thick as mince and live in a shit hole. Fuck off and do not come back, do you realise how much HG does for us and you have the cheek to moan about it.” That is a nasty comment. Notice how the responses came nowhere near to that.
Do you see how you have been allowed to express your opinion? I have also expressed mine. I did so in order to correct a misapprehension. I did so politely and accurately, there is no meanness between you and I, nor need there be.
HG, I totally understand, and it is your blog. I just always have a desire to stick up for people. Nothing personal. My apologies
It is not taken personally Anm and that is fair enough to want to stick up for people, although just doing so because more people disagree (and politely do so) with the initial commenter rather than doing so on the basis of the evidence is a manifestation of the trait of justice being hijacked by ET. You need not apologise, I know you are a sensible commenter and it was appropriate for me to demonstrate the disconnect between people expressing their opinion in a polite/constructive manner and being likened to a nasty mob.
I agree, Anm. HG’s retort was enough to get the point across.
Yes and we know that is your standard position Lisk whenever this issue arises. If A states an opinion and it is corrected by me (or say B) you repeatedly reject the legitimacy of anybody else being allowed to express their opinion.
Now, if your stance is this “Let A state their opinion and let B counter it and that is enough” why then do you not follow that stance and remain silent? You have expressed your own opinion agreeing with Anm. Why is it that nobody else is allowed to express their view IN ADDITION but you are able to?
Tsk tsk, HG.
I said nothing about “allowing” anyone to say anything. Anm did not, either.
No, not tsk tsk at all. Your response is not answering the question.
You stated my response was sufficient. Therefore it follows that you are stating that anybody else did not need to comment. Why? Why should they not be allowed to comment? You did, why not they? Why must their opinions be regarded as excessive? You are invalidating them and therefore you are stating they should not be allowed to state their opinion.
What ANM did was, incorrectly, suggest that Amanda was “taken apart by a mob” when that clearly did not happen. I explained that Amanda expressed her opinion, others did (those opinions disagreeing with Amanda´s) yet the opinions of others were labelled as “nastiness” and “a mob” and that just is not accurate, therefore that is invalidating other people from being able to express their view. Why should they be not be allowed to express their opinion when other people are allowed to?
Please read my complete sentence again.
I did and you have singularly failed to answer the questions, again.
I didn’t even read them.
You had already said enough to get your point across.
Of course you read them. That was why you replied. Nice try at maintaining your stance though, although that did not work as I explained earlier.
You really do not know what I did, HG.
I read one question. After seeing that you did not carefully read my statement. I let you know that.
I did not read further, the same way I did not read further after reading one of the non-HG responses to Amanda’s original post.
And you have continued to avoid answering this question – why do you regard it as wrong that people express their opinions when they disagree with another opinion? I think that is three times I have invited you to do so. Since you have not done so and have been invited to do so, you are either unable to or unwilling to and therefore my point has been made.
HG, I find your questions misleading and so will only address them as far as I have written below. If this proves your point (whatever it is) then so be it.
I mean, really, isn’t what you say and believe enough and/or the last word anyway? If it is, then that proves my own point about superfluous comments.
Not wrong to express opinions. Therefore not wrong for me to express my opinions about people’s opinions.
I certainly did not say, “Shut those opinions down, HG!”
What I did was agree with ANM that that the opinions came down mob-like and there was a tone of nastiness to at least one that I read thoroughly (I almost replied to it yesterday but bit my fingers).
ANM, if I have misconstrued your original post, I apologize.
Good, so you accept that people may express their opinions. Of course, you may express your opinions about the opinion of others, although to suggest that they should not express those opinions (and yes, that it what you are doing) makes your opinion rather pointless as you are contradicting yourself.
No, you did not say “Shut those opinions dow, HG!” and neither did I say or suggest that you did, so to state that is inaccurate.
This is what happens.
1. A expresses an opinion.
2. B expresses an opinion which counters that of A.
3. C also expresses an opinion which counters that of A.
4. D also expresses an opinion which counters that of A.
5. You state that there is no need for C or D to state their opinion. That is your opinion and it is contradictory to be able to express your opinion but to state that C and D should not express their opinion.
To state the opinions came down mob-like is incorrect. As I stated earlier, 5 maybe 6, counter opinions were expressed in a constrictive fashion and over a time span over around 24 hours. That is not a mob at all. A mob descends all at once, in considerable numbers and acts in a herd mentality without regard to reason. Nobody acted in that way and you know that to be the case.
We get it, you do not like more than one person to express admiration for me or defend me at any one time.
I said that there is no need for C or D to state their opinion in order “to get the point across.”
And now it’s about expression of admiration for you?
Oh, HG.
Admiration or support. I seem to recall you referring to someone’s support of my work (which would be regarded as admiration) as “over bearing” therefore reference to admiration is accurate.
But what if C or D wants to make their point. Should they be denied that right. Remember, many people here have been denied the opportunity to voice their views, articulate their thoughts and so forth. I allow people to do so within the parameters of the rules (which are hardly draconian) and where people are incorrect, that inaccuracy is constructively corrected. Nobody is name-called or viciously attacked.
I note there is no response with regard to the error of making reference to a “mob”.
Not denying rights. Not at all.
Hate speech is a legally protected under the First Amendment of the US Constitution. I fully support that and would not want to deny anybody’s right to express it.
Go for it. Say what you want. Call me what you want.
But I can say it’s unnecessary for whatever reason, that it’s superfluous or stupid or that the expression of is overwrought.
I’m not bothering with your mob explanation because clearly your point is literal. And I (don’t know about ANM) was talking about the perception of behavior being mob-like.
Lisk, Hate speech? Where did that come from? There’s nothing wrong with having a strong opinion but remember when you express that opinion you are inviting others to disagree. If you feel strongly about what you’re saying express yourself, but don’t hide behind words like hate speech and mob-like.1) nobody has expressed hate toward you or any other reader, they simply disagree with your opinion 2) you’re opinion loses credibility because now you’re trying to create unnecessary hostility.
I was simply using an extreme example to illustrate my point.
You can characterize my intent as you wish. You have that right, I believe, under one constitution or another.
Lisk I would rather understand your perspective because I’m genuinely interested. The extreme example detoured my understanding of your opinion and led me to a dead end.
I fully support the right to free speech—even hate speech, which is protected under the US Constitution.
Therefore, I have no reason to even attempt to deny anyone here their right to say anything.
Accurate, HG. These types of comments seem to surface when anyone comes either to your defense or has an opposing yet positive point of view regarding you or your work. Some go to the extreme of accusing your supporters of being narcissists (has happened frequently to a certain commenter who is an obvious empath).
It is commendable that you foster an environment where everyone has a “voice” and everyone has the same opportunity to be “heard,” regardless of the point of view.
The reason I commented to Amanda is, over the course of time, a trend has emerged with similar comments. I spoke to what I am aware of in an effort to point out the facts and offer a different perspective. I did find her sarcastic barb in the last sentence unnecessary, but not very surprising, just inappropriate and lacking in empathy. Much like I would feel with any slur of a person’s traits or origin or other differentiator. It should be noted, I do the same for others as well.
Indeed FYC and thank you.
I have noticed that on some previous occasions, the need to address comments that are felt to be a favour of HG or his work also seem to be more directed at who made the comment or observation rather than the comment itself. The annoyance that they dared weigh in again, or at all, because their comments are too frequent, too superior sounding (that is the perspective of the reader), not empathic enough (again perspective of the reader), too defensive of HG…the list goes on, rather than accepting that is actually their opinion (and would be of anyone in his place – not a blind defence of HG himself) and just does not align with theirs. I, also noted that Amanda’s poke at HG about him not having a sensitive side (which I personally did not have a problem with) was not noted as unnecessary but the opinions of others were addressed. That appears to indicate that bias is allowed, but only if it is AGAINST HG or any other narc, which of course demonstrates bias in itself. I suppose it’s inevitable here, where the logical thinking of empaths can be easily hijacked by emotional thinking and projection, but it would be nice if we could stick to what is actually said (with perhaps clarification when needed), instead of our own personal emotional interpretation of it, along with name calling or labelling like Flying Monkeys or whatever tripe is usually thrown around.
HG’s work Flying Monkeys addresses this overused misnomer.
Indeed it did.
NA—good to see more positive feedback on flying monkeys. I thought it was excellent.
Glad you thought so Lorelei.
Which narcissists end up on Dateline for targeting older women for their nursing home money? Would they be the upper lessers with one pair of brown shoes and one pair of black? Just checking because I want one. I want to buy him tennis shoes before COVID drowns the market entirely.
There are a variety of sub schools of narcissist which might engage in such behaviour.
Curious because there are serial cases documented. So, if it is not an individual able to really “plan” their manipulations how do they always end up with grandma’s money over and over? I used to see shows like this. Are these the overbearing evangelical preacher types? I’m telling you, I just feel like this is the guy that owns one suit, lives in his car, stole a bottle of nice cologne and spiffs it up at the local gym, and takes these elderly woman out. Charms them for a few months and they are broke. I’d love to see you elaborate on one of these schmucks. If I ever date a human again he can have no charm and he has to pay the bill each time. I am only interested in stale bread. And as for money, after the last fiasco I would be highly alarmed by someone that can’t pay their bill or seems sketchy about finances. My question rests in how do they achieve these aims each time with no awareness that they have this pattern? I am well aware (for instance) that the best way to gain ten lbs is to eat bad food for awhile. I can make the connection quite readily. Many of these people aren’t totally stupid so how do they not know?! How is there no planning? Do they convince themselves they are into women 30 years older? (for example)
Lorelei,
Geriatric nurse in a retirement home. One of the patients was a man who had been subjected to torture for several years with life-long damage and needed nursing. He had no family, no friends. She (nurse) was much older than him. She said he would not allow her to sit on his bed. [She did not respect his boundaries.] Other things she had said about his behaviour made the impression he never liked her.
She asked him to marry her. She promised him she would take him out of the retirement home. She would take care of him. She said he had agreed and they got married. She took him to her home.
First, she filled in health insurance forms to make him look as if he had dementia (1) and get financial benefits from the insurance company. (Note: Health insurance forms do not use explicit vocabulary. Family members of narcissistic carers do not know what the latter have actually applied for.)
After that, she had power over him. He was voiceless. She made all decisions for him.
A couple of years later, she said she was getting old and decided not do any nursing work for him anymore. She applied for more benefits and had a group of assistants take care of him 24/7 plus a cleaning assistant (2), all paid by the government with people’s taxes – not an insurance.
She recommended other carers of family members to do the same.
She explained which questions should be answered with Yes and which ones with No to make a family member appear mentally incompetent (dementia).
She used to laugh about her marriage being ‘not consummated’. She laughed that her young husband would not let her kiss her.
She used to make fun about how she punished him when wanted to eat something she did not want to. He was thin, she was overweight. If he wanted a piece of cake, he had to eat it while standing (he could barely stand on his own and needed help) and he was denied to have dinner later that day. (3)
Those were just some examples. She planned (1) and (2). As for cruel things like (3), they seem to be done by instinct.
Unbelievable E.B. I really am speechless.
God how I would love to make that cruel cow bark like a seal for her food.
NA,
She posted a photo of him standing. Since he was not able to stand on his own, they had a special equipment (hoist?). It was old, made out of wood, although she could have used a modern one. He had to lean against the hard surface (no cushions) until he finished his cake.
Her friends did not consider her behaviour as abusive. They followed her ‘advice’. She was seen as caring and fun to be with.
I hope she is on the receiving end when she becomes weak and vulnerable and does not have anyone to defend her. I have witnessed disturbing behaviours worse than those above which could happen to anybody, including her.
E.B.—she needs a pillow over her head, this story is disgusting. Only a weak narcissist would torture a weak person like this repeatedly. They aren’t grand enough to catch a bigger fish to fry.
Lorelei
Agreed. The Truth About Flying Monkeys is an excellent read for everyone, but especially so to enlighten those who tend to use the term toward others here.
I always wanted a pet monkey. Honestly. Not now but as a child.
Insightful and fair observation, as always, NA. The reason why I did not care for her sarcastic barb was it actually was unnecessary and insensitive (though I doubt it bothered HG). It would be a bit like saying to a dual amputee, “No point in asking you to jump for joy, you can’t.” The rest of her comment was not a problem, just uninformed and a bit entitled.
NA, and in case I was not clear, I agree with your observation.
HG, from the beginning readers have always come to your defense when someone comments questioning your motives. Actually I think the exchanges in the past were more heated than recent ones. Do you have an opinion as to why, in the last year, other readers have started to become offended by people that defend you. It’s almost like it’s become unaccaptable to speak in your defense or show admiration.
People come to my defence because:-
1. The disagree with the questioner.
2. They are grateful for my work and assistance and therefore regard the questioner as behaving incorrectly.
3. They see the questioner as acting in a manner which is inconsistent with the evidence and as a Truth Seeker they wish to address that.
4. They wish to state their opinion, just as the questioner has.
The number which are offended are very small indeed. As to why it happens, there are a variety of applicable reasons :-
1. Some are narcissists whose control is threatened by the disagreement and the support provided to me, therefore they respond with an attack/further attack in an attempt to assert control. I will make it very clear this is very rare.
2. Some think I am capable of addressing it myself and do not see why others should add their opinion also. That is their view.
3. Some may be jealous, but not realise that is what is driving the behaviour and a person can be jealous without being a narcissist.
4. Some form a view about other readers that they “always” leap to my defence and they just do not like that and therefore they see the name rather than the substance of what is being written. So, for example, it is a bit like saying “Oh HG Tudor wrote it, well he is a narcissistic psychopath so I am not going to read what he has written.” It is dismissed regardless of its inherent value because of the originator of the material. A smiler response might be “Hey, you should see this new lawnmower I bought, it is powerful, inexpensive and has a huge box so you only need to empty it at the end of mowing.” “Really, where did you get it?” “Wall-Mart.” “Oh no thanks, I never buy anything from there.” The product is dismissed prematurely not because of what it is, but because of where it comes from.
Remember, apart from narcissists, people are a bundle of empathic AND narcissistic traits and this causes them to act in particular ways at different times but it does not mean they are a narcissist. Understanding Empathy, The Empathy Cake and the Trait Detector are all excellent materials for helping people understand these complex and diverse responses and for understanding more about themselves.
Thank you HG for this very detailed response. It’s been bothering me a lot lately. I understand why the narcissist act that way so I’m not bothered by it. I even understand new people that may not know that the narcissist running the show isn’t out to take advantage of his readers. I can see how a victim of narc abuse would be sceptical at first. What I don’t understand is empaths that interact everyday being critical of someone coming to your defense or giving you praise for your work. I have a hard time getting past things that I don’t understand (narc relationships being #1). I rely on my ability to see a situation from another person’s perspective as a way to understand them. In this case I can’t put myself in their shoes to see the big picture. It’s not criticism of someone’s opinion that I don’t agree with, it’s criticism of my own lack of ability to let it go. I think my empath traits of truth seeking and loyalty (to both you and fellow readers) are the hurdles I can’t get over.
You are welcome.
Mercy,
“What I don’t understand is empaths that interact everyday being critical of someone coming to your defense or giving you praise for your work.”
Which begs the question, are they empaths, or are they normals, or are they narcissistic? If empaths, what could cause such a suppression of said empathy? Perhaps a narcissistic trait being activated by an internal perception/process such as jealousy? Or ET hijacking logic in respect of the evidence? HG’s insights have helped me understand this far, far better. His empathy spectrum as described in “The Empathy Cake” is most helpful. As a result, I have been saved from any needless frustration that I might have otherwise experienced without such acquired knowledge and insight.
BTW, I find objective loyalty a most admirable trait.
FYC,
Ugh! I put real effort into getting past differences with the last one. I’m reading empathy cake again. You are right about needless frustration.
BTW, thank you for saying objective loyalty. I was beginning to think objective didn’t exist because everything could be debated. All of the debate over that word makes my head spin. Is it even real? Is it an illusion like the narcissist facade? I think to a narcissist nothing is objective.
Mercy, objectivity means we consider all the facts and look for evidence in support of any hypothesis/claim, versus having a bias and looking for only the facts that support that bias. There are some people out there that demand ‘loyalty’ in the absence of objectivity. I find such behavior ego and insecurity driven. I much rather someone be straight forward and honest, especially when I might hope for a different response. How can I learn and grow without such candor? I also am perfectly fine with someone having a different point of view based on any evidence (versus otherwise motivated). I value objective loyalty tremendously and I am fortunate to have people I trust who are supportive but brutally honest. Such loyalty allows me to grow. Something I pursue and value greatly.
Bottomline is, not everyone will agree, and we all see things colored by our own world view. What I know with certainty is: I am not as great at the compliments I receive, and I am not as bad as the baseless criticism I receive. I am just a person making an effort to understand, learn and appreciate with gratitude, and give back. I express myself freely and will continue to do so and I hope others do the same. I enjoy constructive debate and learn from it. I prefer everyone to have a voice and be heard. This is exactly what HG provides here, much to his credit. I have learned so much here I am forever grateful.
FYC,
“What I know with certainty is: I am not as great at the compliments I receive, and I am not as bad as the baseless criticism I receive. I am just a person making an effort to understand, learn and appreciate with gratitude, and give back. I express myself freely and will continue to do so and I hope others do the same. I enjoy constructive debate and learn from it. I prefer everyone to have a voice and be heard.”
What I know with certainty is that I could never express my gratitude as great as you deserve. Thank you for these words. You always know what to say to put things into perspective for me.
I think that to narcissists their perspective is the only thing that is objective.
“ Which begs the question, are they empaths, or are they normals, or are they narcissistic? If empaths, what could cause such a suppression of said empathy? Perhaps a narcissistic trait being activated by an internal perception/process such as jealousy? Or ET hijacking logic in respect of the evidence?”
Or maybe they are just seeing some things that you don’t see? If we disagreed with the way some commenters are defending HG or other people that you are loyal to does that automatically make us narcissists?
Objective loyalty, what does that mean?
If you re-read you will see that a range of possibilities are given. Nobody stated that defending me means suggesting the other person is a narcissist.
Hi HG, I thought that narcissistic meant narcissists. Now I see what you are saying that she meant, “are they Empaths, Normals or Narcissistic Normals”.
I just want to clarify again that I misunderstood your explanation on attack and thought that you were telling me that Amanda’s comment was not an attack and I realized that you were referring to the commenters response to Amanda and other people who attack you. I just feel that I have to clarify that it was a mistake and not a Word Salad since some commenters here have insinuated in the past in different occasions that I am a Mid Range narcissist. I was sleeping and woke up at around 3am I think when I checked my phone and have read your response so I wasn’t fully awake or my mind wasn’t that alert when I was reading it.
As for being accused of being a narcissist, I honestly don’t have a problem with that if there is a category of a narcissist who loves their kids with everything that they have. The only problem that I have with being labeled as a narcissist is the implication that my love for my kids is not real and that is something that I value more than anything and to discount that is not acceptable for me.
I don’t spend a lot of time here on the blog and I don’t broadcast the good things that I do in my life but I most definitely do my part whenever it is possible for me. Even in this blog I have donated to the Angels Assistance a few times but didn’t announce it in the comments session as it makes me actually uncomfortable.
I don’t think that we can assess if a person is an Empath, Normal or a Narcissistic Normal with how they come off online, especially if it’s just from one comment. I think the best ways is to know the person intimately (like live with the person) or to take an assessment through your detectors. In some instances if we know enough about a public personality it is possible to make a good assessment. That is my opinion.
I also believe that giving an unsolicited advice to someone that irked you is a form of attack. It’s not meant to help the person but it is meant to criticize the person indirectly. I don’t believe that anyone is in an appropriate position here to claim that Amanda hasn’t learned gratitude in her life. Maybe she has failed to see how she should be grateful for everything that you provide to all of us for free but to say that she has to learn gratitude so than she can be empowered in her life is incredibly offensive and a very unfair and unsubstantiated assessment. Where is the evidence that Amanda is not grateful to her parents, to her children, to her husband etc.? So I felt that it was an attack that was not needed. But that is also just my opinion. And for the record, I also didn’t like Amanda’s original comment except for the part where she said that she admires your work. I thought that it was provocative, mean spirited and lacking in thought. I am grateful for all that you provide, the free ones and the paid ones. I can’t afford all of your paid ones but I’m just thankful that they are there available when I can afford to get it.
Thank you HG. And that is my last thought on this.
Mercy
You won’t always be able to understand someone’s perspective. Say someone is being disingenuous, or has ill intent to effect a desired outcome behind their interactions (provocation or jealousy for example), standing in their shoes will not help you. Your truth seeker trait will dig in, reject it, and your feet will just get dirty. People usually show a pattern over time and HG has given different examples of the results of those patterns. No need to hurdle – go with your gut and observations of intention and walk around that shit.
Great insight and wise advice, NA.
NA,
Haha yes walk through the shit with knee high rubber boots. The thing I like most about this site (honestly there are many things) is that it’s a safe place to be our natural self without judgement. Defending KTN is a natural response of an empath so when words like clique, mob and hate speech are used I feel like they are used to shut the defender down. I feel like they are cheat words because arguing against it only proves to the accuser their point. They are not words that open healthy debate, they are words to silence people. There are a lot of strong opinions here and a lot of debate but at the end of the day most of us can shake hands and say “good game”.
Reading HGs examples made me realize there are some traits that I won’t identify with and so I’m just going to walk through the shit and be me. I’m not going to be silenced.
Glad to hear that Mercy. I agree.
There’s no healthy open debate here when people get shut down and implied to be narcissists if they are of the opposing view.
“ People usually show a pattern over time and HG has given different examples of the results of those patterns.”
Hence people started to comment on cliques. Because of the patterns of behaviors here that they have observed.
Clique is inaccurate as explained in the longer reply I have provided. You have extensively made your point, let it be left alone otherwise we will have a repetitive back and forth and that is not needed.
Ok HG. 👍
LOL @ “You have extensively made your point, let it be left alone otherwise we will have a repetitive back and forth and that is not needed.”
Stealing from my material I see, HG!
Though I said it better (and more concisely) myself, I must say.
Hardly.
Concise response appreciated.
MP
Please read this with an open mind as my intention is not to attack you but to investigate why you may feel the way that you do about their being “cliques” that are against you or detrimental to the blog.
My comment about patterns was not directed at you. It was a general observation that most of us do (speech, behaviour, etc) and that HG had listed SOME of the conclusions that might arise from those observations and cause us to form opinions about others.
For example: you have concluded that there are cliques. Do you not consider yourself to be part of a clique? There are people here with whom you converse on a frequent basis. You seem to have things in common with them and agree on a lot of their points and opinions. You have joined with others and staunchly defended the groups position against opposing views and lauded their bravery, honesty, and expressed your admiration. You do not appear to see that as a clique yet you accuse it of others who you view as doing those same things. Is that fair?
People tend to gravitate or interact with those they feel they can share observations and opinions with and be heard. The people in those groups may not always agree with them but they know that the others will consider what was said and offer their own observations for consideration. The point is exchange. They feel reasonably sure that if something is misinterpreted in that group that they will be asked to clarify and there will be further discussion before others jump to conclusions or assume their comment has ill intention. In the end, if they still do not agree, they feel it does not exclude them from further interaction. When they do not experience this with certain people they tend to stay away from interacting much with them. I am fairly certain this is the case with you and I so I will use us in this example. You harbour resentment about things that I have said and choose not to interact. I understand that, but if you are being fair, then you should also be willing to accept that there have been times when you have:
Misinterpreted a comment that I have made.
Gone on the defensive without first clarifying.
Acknowledged that you have misinterpreted it once I have offered an explanation.
Apologized.
Do you acknowledge that as a pattern that may have affected your interaction with others also? I can say honestly that it has affected my having more frequent interaction with you as I feel I have to be so cautious as not to offend you. I do not feel that way about those who you would consider as part of my “clique”.
You have acknowledged patterns here that have you arriving at the conclusion of clique (negative connotation) instead of viewing them as mostly like-minded individuals who share frequent interaction. Do you think that it is fair to make that distinction considering that you engage in that behaviour also?
My intention is not to criticize MP. It is an attempt to have you honestly look inward as well as outward to resolve your feelings of being excluded or of people taking shots at you when you may not be understanding their intention. I did not read Mercy’s comment to you as anything near thinking you stupid. I read it as her joking with you about misinformation causing some people to do drastic and stupid things (like drinking aquarium water), and not because we are in any clique together. You misunderstood and immediately took offence, which has lead to further comments indicating your displeasure over others expressing their views just as you have.
I have seen nothing that indicates people regarding you as stupid. I do not regard you as such and that is why I have offered this comment for your thoughtful consideration.
NA
P.S In a totally unrelated matter – I have been dying to ask you how the new pup is fitting in to your family and getting on. I hope that he/she has been a welcome distraction in this current climate and brings you all much joy.
Hi NA,
I understand the pattern tha I have and I’m aware of it. I understand how it has affected/ is affecting my interactions with people. I have taken a trait detector hoping that it would help me with that. There’s also more to that. That pattern that you have said is a toxic behavior of mine that only happens with certain dynamics. And I’m not talking about narcissistic dynamic but certain dynamics where my fight or flight mode is on the background while I am having a benign interaction with someone. And there are factors that cause me to have that which I would prefer to talk to someone in a one on one interaction and not on the blog and not written. It doesn’t happen with majority of my interactions. And a lot of the cause for my reaction was not really the joke or statement that I misunderstood but the other factors that occurred prior to that interaction. I hope to have an audio consult with HG someday too. I already purchased one but I can’t find a time where I can quietly talk to him especially now that my kids are at home all day. But someday I will.
The perceived clique is probably a factor for me too to have that fight or flight since I am personally threatened (although it is a background feeling only if that makes sense) when I perceive that there is a present of cliques. I don’t know if I subconsciously associate that with my previous hurtful experiences in my life but I notice that it doesn’t make me feel safe. I am aware of human nature to have more empathy towards people they are most familiar with than those who are outside of that circle. I have also experienced a lot of underhanded remarks to insult me which at that time because my understanding of the English language beyond textbooks and the nuances and the jargons that one can only learn if they grew up speaking the language was poor, I didn’t understand and because of that I even smiled while I was being insulted only to find out later on that the remarks were an insult towards me. And this caused those people to target me more. Anyway, it is definitely something that I want to address as well. I also noticed that written words have more impact on me than words that are said. My guess is it’s because my relationship with my dad was through his written letters and I wonder if that causes me to internalize written words much more strongly. Hence my intense reactions with my interactions online.
With the perception of a clique, I don’t think that it is a formal clique. I don’t want to expand on my thoughts on that because I have already explained them previously and you will not agree with me. I also don’t want to bring up something that I promised to not bring up anymore. With regards to my friends here on the blog, I don’t see them as cliques. I have two friends that I regularly interact with but they don’t interact with each other regularly. So I can’t say that we are in a group dynamic. With regards to the people that I joined in at the Odd thread, I don’t regard them as my clique either because I don’t regularly interact with them at the blog after the Odd thread. My interactions with Lisk are sporadic and the nature of the interactions are always based on narcissism. With Julie I rarely see her comment here and my interactions with here are also based on the topic of narcissism, the few times that she commented here. With Kel, I complimented her for her eloquence which she really is. I can only dream to express myself like hers. But Kel and I are far from being a clique because of our political differences. I have friends who are Democrats and my brother is a staunch liberal but it doesn’t cause tension between us. But maybe, again the written form of words or the lack of personal interaction where we see each other cause a conflict between me and Kel regarding politics.
Thank you for asking about the puppy. She is very happy living with us. The kids love the puppy dearly although they still have a tendency to be rough even though I have reprimanded them many times so I keep an eye on them. She had a sebaceous cyst which my husband popped recently. I have read that it is common in cocker spaniels and she is half cocker spaniel. She is very bright and she already barks. But she only barks when she hears a car even if the sound of the car is just in the movie that we are watching. She is super adorable and we totally love having her as part of our family.
MP
Thank you for giving consideration to my comment. I can tell that you have given some thought to how experiences that you have had off blog may contribute to your feeling defensive or excluded in some interactions here. I do hope that you continue to examine them with the result of having you feeling more comfortable in clarifying, where you might previously have made assumption and felt immediately defensive. A good point for us all to consider. There are conversations occasionally here (for all of us) where ET gets foothold, but I do not feel that anyone thinks you are stupid, that your views and comments are not valued, or that anyone wants you to feel excluded. I certainly don’t, and don’t believe that to be anyone’s intention. We won’t always agree, but if there is clarity on all sides, it goes a long way to prevent the subject matter from being buried under pure emotion and past unresolved issues. There should still be respect and it should not affect future interaction. There is no right or wrong – only opinion and conversation, so it does not mean that several like-minded opinions are a mob or clique or that the minority opinion is wrong in any way. Remember that when we make a comment individually, we have no control over who agrees or decides to respond to it. It does not mean that we like that person any more than anyone else here, or agree with all that they have to say outside of the present conversation. Each is an individual event. At least it is for me. I have no ill feeling toward you based on previous interaction, just extra caution In explaining, and definitely no attempts at humour in order to avoid hurting your feelings. I almost did not comment to you, but I sincerely wanted to get to the bottom of your feelings on cliques and exclusion if we could. I wouldn’t have bothered If I didn’t care how you feel.
I’m very happy to hear that your pup has become a treasured member of the family. That is a gift that will bring much joy to all. Stay in and stay healthy.
NA
Thank you NA. 💗
Bingo!
“ What I don’t understand is empaths that interact everyday being critical of someone coming to your defense or giving you praise for your work. ”
Mercy,
I never have a problem with people expressing praise for HG’s work. I actually enjoy reading them. I am not the type that expressively gives lavish praises so when someone is able to do it for me indirectly it makes me happy. I cannot speak for the other commenters but for myself I do have an issue when I see several people attacking someone. In this instance though I didn’t like Amanda’s comment either so I didn’t get involved. But I can totally understand what Anm and lisk have said about a “mob”. I don’t think that anyone here believes that commenters are “called “ to defend. It’s obvious that it all happens voluntarily and spontaneously. What has bothered me is the viciousness sometimes towards someone who might be an Empath going through something and the dismissiveness towards those who raise this issue.
HG,
Whenever I see an attack against you 1-4 applies to me which makes want to defend you, and I have done that in numerous occasions.
However numbers 2 and 4 also applies to me sometimes in the reasons people get offended. When number two applies I just don’t say anything especially when I see that the attack is coming from a low functioning narc as I actually for some reason feel bad for them as my mom was one of them and I know that they have a difficult life. When number 4 applies to me I either stay quiet as I know I am already irritated and I might just make the situation worse or I defend the person that I believe is being unfairly attacked. This especially happens when the people defending you dress the person down as if they know this person inside and out just because of some comments left here. Especially if it’s from someone who is not a regular commenter. I do not lock a group of people ridiculing or dressing someone down.
*like not lock
It is important to make a distinction here.
Expressing an opinion in a constructive manner is not attacking someone, e.g. “I do not like what you are HG although I recognise your work is valuable to many people.” That is not attacking me that is a constructive and fair observation.
“You are an utter bastard HG and you just use this blog for fuel.” That is attacking me and it is not constructive or accurate.
The word “attacked” is being used with too much elasticity.To attack is to criticise fiercely and aggressively. That occasionally occurs but with nowhere near the regularity suggested – someone who constructively disagrees is not attacking.
Similarly, a group of people who disagree is neither a mob nor a clique. A mob is a large crowd (4 or 5 people does not constitute a mob) which acts in concert (those commenting act individually) with regard to an unruly or disorderly intent (they are articulating their opinions). Just because a handful of people disagree with someone else that is not a mob.
A clique is a narrow, exclusive group with a similar interest. There are no exclusive groups here (save the Knowing HG Forum which I created to prevent people seeing “spoilers”) because anybody is free to join in with the conversation, that is the beauty of this place. You can see what is begin discussed, you can join in and comment. Nobody has ever written “Hey MP, butt out, this is a conversation about triangulation between this group and you are not part of it. Find your own group.” I do occasionally see people criticise someone else for “butting in” but they are allowed to butt in, no conversation is private, anybody is free to join in. Their contribution may not be welcome by certain individuals, their comment may not be helpful, but often it is. This is a place for discussion.
You are, like anybody else, perfectly entitled to defend your views and position, but using terms such as “attack” ,”viciously attack” or “mob” where they are not applicable is unhelpful. It is important to look at what is being written rather than focus on “A made a comment and B,C,D and E all disagreed, that is not fair, that is a mob, they are attacking A. No – read what A wrote, read what B, C, D and E wrote as individuals and evaluate the content and you will find that A expressed an opinion as did B,C, D and E and those four disagreed with A and are just as entitled to express their opinions as A.
Thank you for your desire to defend me, it is appreciated.
I agree that adopting a stance of silence can be sensible where you see a comment is coming from a low functioning narc and in those instances the use of “attack” is then usually applicable because the manner and language of what they write is commensurate with an attack, it is aggressive, fierce and hostile, we had an example in the last 24 hours with the overly sexual aggressive comment.
I do not want an historical back and forth raked up yet again and whilst I encourage people to be able to express themselves, I will just delete messages which threaten to resurrect something which is historic and not to be revisited.
Thank you for explaining HG.
I guess I use the word attack when I feel a negative energy from the comment. In this instance with Amanda, some parts of her comment seem valid but some parts felt like an attack. I honestly didn’t like the comment either and I thought that you did a fantastic job addressing her comment and you were magnanimous about it. But I see what you are saying that attack is too strong of a word and it may be more appropriate for some of what Narcissus wrote in the past for example.
I didn’t really know the specific definition of a mob that it had to be a large group. I think that sometimes the intensity of the comments from the people defending you all at the same time directed towards one person feels like a figurative mob to me as a bystander. It is the feeling that I get when I read it. So even though I didn’t agree with some of what Amanda said for example, I didn’t add my two cents because I felt that several people have already done that and my sympathy for shifted towards her. I hope that my description is making sense.
The clique, I didn’t know the exact meaning of it either and I was using the word to describe how some interactions here of the same people feel when I see it. How the same group of people give each other lavish praises and also dress down someone who gets in conflict with one of them. Again this is my perception and clique may not be the appropriate word for it.
HG thanks for the heads up. I haven’t noticed you deleting a comment of mine yet but I wouldn’t be offended because you are the moderator and this is your blog and you have every right to moderate this in what you believe would be best.
HG I just realized that I didn’t understand your second paragraph correctly. You were referring to the commenters not Amanda. My bad.
I don’t fully agree but I will just end it at there to prevent more back and forth.
Thank you for your patient response HG.
Also HG to add more to number 4:
“ Some form a view about other readers that they “always” leap to my defence and they just do not like that and therefore they see the name rather than the substance of what is being written.”
I do recognize the validity of what is being said. What I don’t agree with is the tone and the personal attacks.
An extended personal attack is not welcome, I agree, and those are contrary to the rules. As explained, the term “attack” is being used too widely.
lisk, HG
This is ridiculous. HG AND Amanda are both correct. But which side do WE percieve as correct?
I utterly understand Amanda’s POV but if she is new, she might not get what HG has done for us all in the past.
Amanda asks a fair question which HG has answered. She night not be aware, just a simple lack of reading, so she must not be judged too harshly.
Equally, we all know what HG has given us. Freedom and largely for free.
I married a psychopath. Being a IPPS for one of those is a whole new ball game to what most of us experience. It is my medal.Not of honour but resilience. Stoicism.
Now. Let Amanda and HG be. She asked a jolly good question and she recieved her answer.
She is wrong. HG is right.
Amanda, come back if you can.
Oy.
My apologies Renarde. I’d like to take back that “Oy,” if I may.
I confused “Amanda” for “Anm” and could not understand for the life of me what you are getting at there.
“Oy” on me.
lisk
No worries lovely.
AND HG, ANM accented your logic, apologized for any miscommunication, and left it at that. 👏🏻👏🏻
Correct.
NA:
“That appears to indicate that bias is allowed, but only if it is AGAINST HG or any other narc, which of course demonstrates bias in itself.”
Do I have to stop saying “Yo mama” to obvious trolls? It’s one of my few amusements at the moment.
E.B.:
If there’s such a thing as a Lesser Empath, I am one. I want to beat this bitch with a baseball bat. I might feel guilty about behaving in an unladylike manner 20 minutes later when I calmed down, but it wouldn’t be as if I’d hurt a helpless guy like him, which would actually be wrong.
Violetta,
I dont even remember what this thread was about. I tried to go back to remember, but I saw there is like 1k comments, and my add is too much to process all that. Haha, about calling yourself “Lesser Empath”.
If there’s a backlash in the UK—or anywhere in this world right now—it should be against the narcs that are choosing to shut an economy down in order to presumably save a few lives. There should be a backlash against doing more harm than good.
I doubt we will get a reply from Amanda, Lisk. Rather than have the good grace to respond with “Now I have reflected on the matter having been provided with more information, I realise my initial comment was hasty and wrong. I apologise.” There is only silence.
That’s okay, HG. I was not expecting anything from Amanda.
Bought. And I recommend everyone buys.
Empaths are so vulnerable. I am vulnerable to numerous Hoovers, from the Middles.
Please Empaths, its oxygen mask time. Get your protection in place before you even attempt to help others.
Thank you HG.
P.S Please thank the people who are serving you. Especially shops and pharmacies. Be kind and patient.
P.P.S if anyone buys my sushi, I WILL kill you.
Love and kisses as always
Ren
X
Thank you Renarde.
RE: “P.S Please thank the people who are serving you. Especially shops and pharmacies. Be kind and patient.”
Does one really need to request this of empaths?
Lisk
What an abhorrent thing to say. Truly.
It does not hurt to remind people, especially Empaths who are embroiled in their own situation.
Shame on you.
No shame here.
I find patronizing and obnoxious these types of “reminders” that ask or tell people to behave how they normally behave anyway.
Now and always, though, the people who make of a show of this “thanking” are particularly patronizing and especially obnoxious.
I was at a farmers market yesterday, looking at the vegetables, when this loudmouth woman made sure she was heard saying to the vendor as she payed, “”Oh, THANK you! Thank you for being here and for ALL that you do!”
The vendor embarrassingly but politely responded with a “You’re welcome” and signaled for the next person to come to pay their money for all that he and the farmer does.
Nothing wrong with politely thanking someone for their goods and services, but anything over the top like that reeks of Narcdom.
lisk,
That particular response you described likely was a product of Narcdom. Note how the thanking of others, in that manner, actually drew massive attention to the one doing the thanking?
Empaths do gratitude differently.
Absolutely, WhoCares.
I was just minding my business, looking at the leeks, and then I’m looking at her and minding her business because she basically commanded it with her thank-y display.
“Empaths do gratitude differently.” Sounds like it should be a bumper sticker!
lisk,
Haha!
(Re: the bumper sticker)
Hey – maybe there’s a cash grab for some unemployed Empath at this time…
lisk
I was being kind. Stop jumping at shadows which simply do not exist.
I am now being incredibly restrained in my reply to you.
Persist with this unravelled line of logic and the next reply wont be as restrained.
I will remind you that I accessed the AAF. I don’t percieve HG would have allowed this if I wasnt an Empath.
Good day, Madam
No shadow-jumping here.
What is the AAF? Should I be afraid? Very afraid?
The Angel Assistance Fund.
Just that little thing.
Oh, I think I see: You think I am accusing you of being a narc?
lisk
Are you? I have no idea but I suspect you are.
I have completed in the last few days the EDC. Awaiting the results.
Renarde, Worry not if someone misjudges you. You know your own heart and intentions. Idle judgements often reflect internal attitudes.
FYC
Thankyou
Answered above or below, depending on whether you’re in app or web browser.
I thanked the coffee shop proprietor that was open on the day that I was obligated to be out in the community (son’s visitation with his father) for being open – even though they had to structure things differently because of Covid19 (paper cups instead of stay-in mugs, etc.)
I greatly appreciated having a quiet corner and fresh coffee. And I didn’t require reminding to be thankful, but I get what you are saying, Renarde. It’s true that we can forget the little things when we are stressed and distracted – especially now.
WC
Thankyou. I was just trying to be kind and I appreciate your words x
Whocares, are you able to do likes on here? I unsubscribed and re-subscribed in an effort to “clean up” some of my deficits on here & jostled settlings a bit. I could only previously like via the app. Do you have any of these “disconnects” per the app & email notifications?
Yeah, experiencing some weirdness or disconnects as you say. I think if someone replies through the the app or signed directly into WordPress I get the notifications. But if they reply on the website, using the ‘reply’ buttons, then I don’t necessarily receive any kind of notification. So apologies all around if someone replies to me and I don’t see; I have some time to reply these days but not to always search out the original conversation.
My notifications are already coming through differently based on unsubscribe/resubscribe. I have even corresponded with WP happiness people. It’s a cluster.
Even empaths get stressed out.
I know that. Everybody does.
Vi
I suspect I have got up peoples noses with my comment. The reason I said it was because I forgot and I felt awful.
In the que and there is a very loud woman shouting for her boy. Yup, you got it. She left. And the staff started giggling. I knew what she was. I start talking to the lovely lady serving me. I could tell she was mildly distressed. A customer had a pop at her. I listened, paid and left. Just as I was exiting, I thought FUCK! I should have thanked her and reassured her.
That was my thought process. No more, no less. So easy to forget and I even did it again today over something else.
Renarde, You don’t have to defend your comment. I appreciated your reminder. It may seem to some that the reminder isn’t needed but we shouldn’t need to be reminded to wash our hands either. The hand washing reminders are all over the place. They’ve even got my 85 year old father paying attention to germs. Something I’ve been trying to teach him for years.
Mercy
Ha ha! That made me laugh!
So I ‘treated’ myself to a drive to the chemist. Whilst I was there (to pick up urgent medicines NS) bought ‘essential beauty products’.
Had a chit chat as I do with the woman who was assisting me. The shelves were not great. I summoned the Mainwaring spirit and made do and mended.
I was sorely tempted to say ‘simmer down’. I resisted NS. I resisted. (I may have made this last sentence up).
Mercy, the old can be utterly terrible about hygiene. But then again, they went through WW2 in the case of your father. My mum used to bathe in Dettol FFS.
Much love to you and I hope you and yours are keeping safe x
Renarde,
Thank you dear. I hope you keep safe as well. Oh and don’t forget to wash your hands and say thank you 😉
Mercy
Ha ha! I also have a copy of the Mail on Sunday here
#rensarseisclean
But smudged in print ink.
HG
Norty!
I got the Overlords to lick it clean!
#kinkylikethat
Exactly.
Reminder Overload.
Good on your father for making it to 85 without heeding the advice!
Renarde:
Dettol?
Dear Gawd.
I had to stop adding that to my laundry, it was so irritating. I can use it for things like curtains or quilts, but nothing that’s going to touch my skin, even in tiny quantities.
Adding it to one’s bath…. Your mom is tough.
Vi
On Dettol.
Scouting around the local shop I note that there were wet wipes and toilet roll!
The Dettol though, he was selling for £6 and £8 respectively!!! Should be £2 and £3?
Top tip for NS. Zoflora works just as well and is cheap as chips. My medic bud told me that the virus is enclosed in a lipid sack. Fat. So any surfactant will work. Hence soap.
Dettol. Everpresence. Takes me back to childhood every time.
YAY Renarde I can’t WAIT for your result 😀 You are awesome! I think you’re off the scale. hehe. You are one of a kind and amazing.
I’m waiting for the Trait Detector. Maybe when the excitement of the Empath Detector wears off you can get the Trait Detector.
Whitney
Aww shucks! 💛
That means we are waiting together!
Did you do the EDC?
Renarde,
There is no way you’re an N!
Intrigued re your results too.
Do you have any idea what type of E you would be?
I thought I was going to come out as a mid and wanted to be able to recognise this.
But the more I continue to learn about Ns, the stronger my N traits become. Something I’m not particularly proud of at all.
I look back to what I was like before, a huge part of me wishes I could be like that again and have compassion for all of mankind. But I simply have none left for any Ns and it seems to be on a sliding scale. The more empathic traits someone has the more compassionate I feel towards them and the more help I would give them. Any help I offer to an N is now self serving only.
Alexis
I totally get your point about how you feel about Ns generally and it strikes me that you are feeling some guilt about it.
I went through this phase as well. But then, all I needed to remember was how they treat humanity. The devastation, the self harm, the suicides, the rapes and the deaths.
I must admit I do give them very short shrift on SM. In reality, when I have to physically interact, actually with anyone…I run them through my version of the NDC is my head. Most pass. Some, do not. Then it’s my choice if I interact further or not. But like you, it would be rare now for me to push myself out. I think you should stop punishing yourself and stand up and be proud of the weaponised Empath you clearly are.
As to what I am. The thought I might be a full N has me waking up at night. Like you, I would rather know. Too many people have accused me so who is right? Who is wrong? What is the angle of perception here? But thank you.
As to what I am. Happy enough with E, tbh. As to cadre, I’d be very suprised if magnet did not prominently feature. As to the others, I dont know but I guess that’s where the trait detector fits in.
You keeping well?
Thanks Renarde,
I’m not sure whether this is guilt or more a selfish sadness for myself that I am unable to return to being the person I once was.
I don’t feel any guilt or compassion for Ns whatsoever.
I have learned to manage them and my life is much better as a result. They have no affect on me any more. Because I can explain away what they do. That’s a massive plus!
Glad you give them a short shrift. they deserve nothing more! Hahah yes I put everyone through an NDC in my head too. Everyone is guilty until proven otherwise hahaha
I am incredibly proud of the weaponised emapth I have become. We all should be. It has transformed my life.
But I do still wonder, am I an N from time to time even though HG hsa confirmed I’m an E.
I’m pleased you are doing the test. Noone has accused me of being an N. But I’m certain a few suspect it as I have strong N traits.
Good luck with it!
I’m keeping fit and healthy! Are you well?
Alexis, Whitney and all who have asked.
The results are in. I’ve digested, disassembled and cogitated.
I am a…….LLV!!!
Only joking!
I’m a CD. With strong saviour traits and significant contagion (!) and some Geyser. The rest either of School or Cadre are not significantly represented.
I will have more to say once I’ve had another good think.
Thanks for everyone who has shown an intrest. It’s made my week x
Thanks HG to you as well.
Yes Renarde I did the EDC and I was Geyser/Carrier Standard Empath with Codependent traits 😁
I knew I was Geyser type but I didn’t know I was Carrier. The Carrier behaviour is natural to me so I didnt know I was doing it.
Whitney
How intresting on Carrier! Just because you didnt percieve it yourself.
Goodness, what a time!
I’ve been getting overpriced toilet paper at gas stations and saving it for short visits (damp paper towels are good enough for long visits), but I’m going to check the groceries and see if it’s been restocked.
Tried to apply for Medicaid (good Lord, I used to WORK for them), but the phones and internet are possessed by Pazuzu. They’re discouraging lobby visits, but what other option is there?
I’ll wear my paint mask, bring my own pen, and try to keep my distance. For THEIR safety, since I’m slowly getting my sense of smell back, as I discovered when I finally got to the backlog of dishes.
Hi Violetta,
I am glad you have gas station toilet paper! i have seen it on the shelves and have plenty! It is hit or miss. My kids asked about masks and I’ll bring some home soon to appeal to this request.(it makes people feel better to have them) I was originally taking time off work, but this is now no longer the case. We have one staff COVID death and one young provider in intensive care on a ventilator with COVID. I am returning in an expanded capacity at the end of the week. Narcsite will take a back seat over the next few months for sure. I think you also asked me about my academic program and it also is officially on hold, but I have a plan, a much different one. Life changes daily due to this situation. Good luck with the medicaid stuff, I will say that if you have fedloans you can easily put them off due to this mess. It is as simple as hitting a button for COVID-impacted once logging in.
Oh Vi!
Good luck with the Medicaid
Our NHS has been woefully underfunded for decades but it’s still free. Just.
I am sure you pay taxes Renarde!
HG
Well I certainly did!
Ha ha.
HG
I’ve never understood the whole NI argument either!
Renarde I’m so excited to find out the result of your Empath Detector. Can you please share with me as soon as you find out? What school/cadre of Empath do you think you are? 💖
Whitney
I’m as excited as a little girl at Christmas. I’m very much looking forward to it! And I shall do so x
Whitney
I dunno. I’m just hoping it’s not narc! 💛
You are not a Narc Renarde 💜 You are full of essence. You are awesome.
You know you did something for me 1 or 2 years ago? I was in the depths of despair about the LMR Somatic and I shared what he did. You said you wished you could be in a room alone with him. You know that made me feel so happy? That somebody was angry for me, and wanted to hurt the LMR. I will never forget that. Thank you Renarde.
Indeed Whitney.
Both @Renarde and @MommyPino, seem to mention the possibility of being a narc.
You are empaths, many generously written long comments through the years make me 100 % that you are empaths. I have read your stuff with great pleasure,
Renarde and Mommypino.
Thank you Cat. Most kind of you. 💗
Renarde:
I am not qualified to say you are not a Narc at all, though I seriously doubt you are one, but I can say with some confidence that you are not a mid-ranger. If you were, I’d want to beat the everlovin’ shit out of you.
Hope this helps, at least until you get your results.
OMG you guys!
I havnt read recieved notifications on your tagging of me, so please forgive me.
@Whitney Your comments have absolutly humbled me. I’m so glad I made a difference. X
@Cat
Mrs MP is awesome. And thank you x
@Violetta
Ha ha! Queensbury or bare knuckle? I can do both.
Love you missus! X
Thank you Renarde. You are awesome too.
Renarde:
NY subway style. Whatever you can use to bludgeon, slice, or puncture is kosher.
Violetta—have you seen Princess or Desiree? Are they maybe bunkered up together shopping for purses?
I am glad you asked, Lorelei, I have thought of them too and hope they are well and just busy.
Desiree and PSE if you read this, do let us know how your are doing. Both NYC and Germany have been hit harder with Covid19 and I hope you and yours are safe and well and stay that way.
Lorelei:
I have not seen either.
Hoping everyone’s okay, even Pammy. The world needs comic relief.
“Hoping everyone’s okay, even Pammy. The world needs comic relief.”
*Snort*
I was wondering about zwartbolleke. I hope she is OK, I haven’t seen her comments lately.
HG, You are unbelievably responsive to the needs of your readers. Your critical insight and information is invaluable and appreciated. For those who may think that this or your other COVID19 posts or products are an example of a N taking advantage of a bad situation, it is entirely the opposite. The pandemic and shelter in place present new challenges to empaths that must interact with Ns through this dynamic and fluid situation and your wise guidance is very necessary and most helpful. Thank you for all you do to keep us informed, prepared and protected.
Absolutely correct FYC. Nobody has to buy it, it’s MY work and MY expertise and it will save people a massive amount of time, aggravation and money for a very small sum. It’s not like I’m buying toilet roll and selling it on at a huge markup. I’m providing my expertise. I know several doctors, they’re working very hard at present but they’re not doing so for free. I know the CEO of a logistics company which is ensuring that supply chains remain effective and they’re not doing any of it for free.
This is invaluable for the price and will be my reading with wine material tonight so I can deal w the narc until this ends and I can get him AWAY. You’re the best HG thank you for this! Not only am I battling the virus I’m battling the LMR 😡 and he’s miserable.
You’re welcome
All true, HG. All of your work delivers massive dividends well beyond the small initial investment. Literally no other investment will deliver your rate of return. You are changing perspectives and changing lives. The amount of time you put into all of this for free is staggering and commendable. Exceedingly well done. I cannot properly convey my depth of gratitude for your time and accessibility. Your counsel truly makes all the difference.
Plus we could all use a big laugh. “Daaaaaad! I told you not to come in, I am doing a very important interview and you have ruined it, just like you ruin everything and you have ruined my life.”
Doris in the original Fame: I HATE Ralph Garci!
I must remember this feeling and use it in my acting!
HG you never have to explain your expertise to any of the thousands of people you have helped over the years. As you have said time and time again, no one is being forced to read or purchase any of your work! You have given your time and knowledge consistently over the years, many of those for free. You have helped many of us get through tough times like holidays, anniversaries, etc., again for free or for a donation to the AAF. You read over all of the comments that we write on the blog and put up with far more then any other person would be able to put up with! You have been a constant in my life and I’m sure the lives of many more just like me. In times like these you are a God send! No matter how bad things may get I know I can come to this place and you will be here! Your work is worth far more then you charge and I for one am grateful that you keep your prices low so that more of us can afford to purchase it. Sometimes I think you are a better empath then some of us are. I don’t write eloquently, I’m not a brainiac, rich, or worldly. I am not trying to win any popularity contest, I am here because I am a very damaged individual searching for answers that only you have! So you keep charging HG and the people that know you are the only one in the world with the answers, will keep purchasing them! I have and always will write what I feel, that is just what I do. Please stay safe HG and everyone else who reads and or comments on here! ❤️ Emojis are something I do! 😘💞
Thank you FM1T
Actually, you are incorrect, FM1T, that was a very eloquent comment! Well said, and better still, it comes from your heart. FM1T, others may have hurt or abused you, but you are not damaged whatsoever. You are a beautiful soul and your participation here is always valued. Stay safe and healthy! 😘
Money indeed does make the world go ’round.
You sound very familiar here. I’m sure you’re smiling with your mouth but not with your eyes, HG. Even so, your sense of humor is saving me from going downhill in this craziness. Thank you.
You’re welcome
I was responding and lost it so delete that partial reply if sent. No one should work for free unless they feel compelled to, and I certainly do not. I put up with tons of poor behavior and do indeed choose my clientele, but am paid. You answer questions constantly to strangers and the blog is rich & well developed. All while taking insults and mitigating conflict.
Thank you Lorelei.
Is the CEO a cerebral, somatic, non-broke, non-narcissist? Of course not, but, I’m not giving one ounce of time to any more robot people. I would rather have cock roaches than be anxious over the passive aggressive shenanigans, black and white thinking, (which I can now sense from such impacted individuals.. yes..) I’m disgusted by having been surrounded by and conditioned to think alien behavior was ok and expected.