Do Narcissists Pretend To Love You?
2 thoughts on “Do Narcissists Pretend To Love You?”
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I fail to see the difference between a Lesser or Mid-Range Narcissist believing that he loves his victim, and anyone else who believes they love someone. Even if the narcissist is incapable of “love” in the sense that most people consider or define love to be, if the narcissist thinks that he loves his victim in the only capacity that he has for love (whether most people would consider it infatuation, obsession, fixation, etc.), I would consider it to be that the narcissist loves his victim. In the case of the Greater or Ultra, where he knows he is purposely pretending to love his victim, sure, I agree that he does not love his victim. But for the Lesser or Mid-Ranger, I feel that if he thinks that he loves his victim, that qualifies as loving her. It is not the quality of love that most people are accustomed to or desire, nor is it a healthy love, but it is the same as anyone else who thinks that they love someone. Put another way, if my narcissist believed that he loved me, even though he did horrible things that hurt me, I would not feel that he tricked me or conned me into thinking that he loved me; I would only feel that way if he knew that he did not love me, but pretended that he did. Purposely pretending and tricking is utterly offensive; but in my book, if the narcissist believed that he loved me, I would not feel offended or misled just because he was incapable of the generally accepted notion of “love.” Similarly, looking at the opposite side of the coin, some might claim that the way that empaths love narcissists is not “love,” but rather obsession or addiction; but I think that empaths would insist that it was genuine love, and wouldn’t feel that they were being fraudulent in claiming to love the narcissist.
I was thinking the exact same thing.