Cross Pollution
Cross Pollution will affect you and you do not even realise that it is happening. Now is the time to change that.
It is a continuing danger to your No Contact Regime.
Are you struggling to escape continuing feelings of misery, anger, dismay and sadness?
Are you finding that out of nowhere you are wanting to find out what the narcissist is doing?
Are you wanting to date again?
Does your No Contact Regime not seem to be working?
Are you wanting to communicate with the narcissist in some way?
Are you finding you cannot shake thoughts and feelings about the narcissist?
If any of the above resonate with you, then Cross Pollution will be a factor and you need to address it.
This Logic Bulletin explains what Cross Pollution is, what it does, how it affects you, how to recognise it and what you can do about it.
You need to understand and recognise that it is highly likely that you have involvement with more than one narcissist in your life, although you may not realise it. The presence of these narcissists result in Cross Pollution. Although you may not regard these other narcissists as causing you a problem, their presence causes Cross Pollution which can lead you to vulnerability towards a new narcissist in a different environment or the Cross Pollution can weaken your no contact regime with regard to an existing, problematic narcissist. It is a clear and present danger for victims of our kind, it is imperative that you understand what it is and then you can take evasive and remedial action to address it and then protect yourself further.
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13 thoughts on “Cross Pollution”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
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Thank you for letting me vent here , it really stops me from becoming overwhelmed with my emotions.
Kiki
I struggle with this terribly.I once was in a good position after reading here extensively and having several consults . However
I always fail at No Contact .I have gone 6 months in the past ,instead of feeling better , I get worse It’s like I feel abandoned and forgotten , other things in life don’t help , the more time goes on the pain deep down intensifies, then the emotions build up and I contact the Narc .Dreams about the Narc get more vivid instead of normal fading away.
I have spent 10 years entangled , it’s like 10 years for nothing and he wasn’t even my husband .
Kiki
I need to vent here somewhere safe .
In my heart I could not hurt the Narc but lately fantasies of exposing him are getting stronger and stronger.I’m scared of what I am thinking.
It’s like maybe I have reached a point where a person snaps and takes revenge.
It is a feeling of simmering rage at the unfairness of it all .
I take full responsibility for my choice in becoming a DLS , but the rage is simmering underneath and I’m doing everything to try and stop it .
I don’t know if I’m an Empath as I have never taken the test yet .
Kiki
Dearest Kiki,
No one said it was ever going to be easy sweetheart
We find it incomprehensible that someone we cared about so much could treat us in the manner which they did
We must find alternate thought processes with mindfulness and self wellbeing
This is crucial in our recovery
Excercise, sleep and controlled breathing are paramount
The first step to healing is concentrating fully on yourself
There is much work to be done and one must start with emotional thinking
Redirect that rage into loving yourself
If at first you don’t succeed, you keep on trying and with each try it will get easier …..never give up
Your narcissist does not care about you, period ….. sorry pet
Please do not expose the narcissist
Kiki, you are 100% an empath 😊
Said with much love and with the best intentions …..please care of yourself
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Wow Bubbles, what a great comment! Glad to have found it.
Dearest A Victor,
Thank you lovely, I just found your comment ! 😲
I’m a bit behind
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
No problem! I didn’t need a response, just happy to have found your comment, it was helpful regarding our recovery. Thank you!
Thank you Bubbles I’m only seeing your kind reply now .
I have had to take leave from work my emotional health was in such a state .I began having anxiety attacks and crying.
I am now feeling better but had to see a medical doctor.
I am quite emotional and I blocked all these feelings for a couple of months and really thought I was fine , but I was becoming quite depressed, losing interest in my life , demotivated everything, then in lockdown number 2 for me I just lost the plot .
I feel into a black hole .
Thankfully I’m feeling much better .
Kiki
Hi Kiki, I hope you are managing things better now. It is good that you are here and able to talk about things. RE: your last paragraph, it is understandable – especially the lockdowns adding to the difficulties. Some people find it more difficult than others. Stay strong (keep talking with us) you will be ok x
Dearest Kiki,
Sorry for the delay lovely one, I’m so far behind here
Feeling “anxious” is quite normal these days, so you’re definitely not alone there, what with Covid n all (I quite relished it, luvved being at home away from people ewwww ……😂…..no one on the roads, less people in the shops, it was great !
I managed to do so much, found new things to do and watched heaps of Netflix …hehe
I just luv being busy, helps me to stop overthinking
The trick is to try and not to fall into those damn black holes whilst finding the white light at the end of that bloody long tunnel ….it’s there….you just have to keep moving forward
Another trick is also to never give ‘your all’ to anyone, ever! Because the more you invest, the more you have to lose ! One should always keep reserves, bit like one’s bank account …. for those rainy days, or I prefer, those sunny days as well 😉
(Watch a lazy person get the job done, they do it with the least amount of effort …… they never give “their all” because if you do, more is required of you, they work smarter not harder)
I’m relieved you are seeing a doctor, that’s an extremely positive move Kiki, well done
Someone I know is taking prescribed CBD oil and absolutely swears by it, another is on low anxiety medication and she swears by that too! (Note to self, stop hanging around those who swear so much) 🤣
Keep posting comments lovely, you know we are all here to help you the best we can !
Sending big warm hugs 🤗 Kiki, luv yourself first, you’re worth it !
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
I remember listening to this last year. Extremely helpful, HG.
Took several thoughts. It wasn’t some narc at work, but a school teacher for the kids. Being aware I could take down unnecessary anxiety, remove most contacts and bring things to other straff instead.
Good to read.
*staff