Why You’re Addicted to the Narcissist
As part of the implementation and maintenance of your no contact regime, it is necessary for you to understand a very important person – you.
You need to understand that you have an addiction, an addiction to the narcissist.
Why do you have this addiction? What is its foundation? Why is it so powerful? Why does it prevail even when you gain extensive knowledge about escaping the narcissist? Why do you know the narcissist is bad for you yet keep engaging with the narcissist in some form? Why is it so hard to overcome? Why does it have such a grip on you?
This Assistance Package answers all of these questions and more and is a FUNDAMENTAL necessity of achieving freedom from the narcissist.
Give yourself a logic injection and obtain this Assistance Package here
7 thoughts on “Why You’re Addicted to the Narcissist”
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I will share here that I understand the difference between ‘addiction to narcissism’ and ‘addiction to the narcissist’. There is a complete, yet parallel difference. It is about understanding what this difference is and how it applies where you are concerned.
In my view, once your understand the addiction to narcissism (Logical Thinking), you can ‘see’ where your addiction to the narcissist (Emotional Thinking) ‘applies’ – should there be any ‘current’ and / or ‘recent / last’ narcissist(s) in your life.
In my case, the ‘foundation’ was mother; it was so ‘powerful’ because it was what I was ‘constructed’ to learn. Time and time again, mother narcissist and other narcissists ensnared, hoovered, ensnarements, more hoovering me into their ‘worlds’.
Just moments ago, I re-read my ‘Letter to the Narcissist’. I cried. Why? Because that is what happened in my past. I was not feeling sorry for myself. It was the life I was forced to have, the fears I had, the experiences I lived. The ‘child’ within me that I had carried (‘trapped’ child) for so many years has now been released (at some point during the last year I have been here). I don’t know what day it happened, it ‘dawns’ on you.
Mother was a bitch. She is now a dead bitch. Good. I have “re-written” my own history, she does not exist, never has. It’s past, nothing worth ‘holding’ onto mentally or emotionally. I’m smiling now. Satisfaction to say words like this about her. On here. Slamming my ET door as I leave this comment.
Thanks again, HG. For this site.
This fits so well with what I just wrote to JB on Spanked! Good grief HG, how do you know so much!! I know, I know, that massive intellect and encyclopedia of collected information. This is epiphany week. It is amazing. Thank you for all you do.
Because all the time I have in my head this idyllic picture of establishing a father-daughter bond (narcissus and our child). Even though both sides don’t want it, and it’s even better that it is, I still stand in the middle and look regretfully in both directions …
Everything else is just a derivative.
And there is a sense of guilt for choosing her such a hopeless father. Ghost.
Joa, I have the guilt for choosing my exes to be the father of my children also. That guilt is so bad.
I know. I can’t get out of this. Or maybe I don’t want to. My inner judge punishes me:
You can’t go any further. You’re not gonna make a life for yourself. Since you, a woman, you did not take care of a solid foundation for your child.
I know I give a lot. I know he’s the one who broke up, he’s gone, he doesn’t love she. I know everyone is responsible for themselves. But…
The verdict is unambiguous. I am guilty.
Joa,
I understand guilt. It plagued me with the narcissist. There was a real sense of owing. He supported me at the start of the ‘relationship’. To me that meant, I was failing him if I didn’t keep trying to figure things out. Guilt, I said on another thread earlier tonight, it’s a killer. I think it’s one of the toughest feelings to unravel.
I wonder if this guilt is why you have allowed him back in? A form of self punishment for something you take responsibility for, having a child with a narcissist. Are you subconsciously pushing self destruct because you ‘deserve it’?
Empaths do take responsibility for more than their share. A Martyr empath takes on even more. I wonder if you have martyr as one of your cadres. I have a little martyr in my cadre make up and it shows up with the responsibility I take for others and even for events. If it rains on holiday, my fault, I booked that week, the week after was also available.
Now that I am aware of the Martyr element through taking the EDC, I can spot it when it lights up and I can talk myself down. It rained on holiday, I don’t control the weather, I can’t feel guilty for it and I don’t need to apologise for it!
Joa, none of us knew what we were getting ourselves into. Neither did you. You can’t take responsibility for something that you weren’t even aware of. Xx
https://narcsite.com/2020/11/22/you-wear-guilt-16/
Xx