Understanding Emotional Empathy : The Difference Between Empath, Normal and Narcissist


What is Emotional Empathy and who has it? What is its role with regard to empaths, normal people and narcissists?

To ensure you understand what has happened to you in respect of your involvement with the narcissist AND to allow you to defend yourself against future ensnarement and hurt, this Assistance Package will provide you with a wealth of information which includes :-

Understanding Emotional Empathy and what it is

Understanding how Emotional Empathy operates with regard to empaths, normals and narcissists

What does Emotional Empathy do?

Why empaths and normal people can be hurtful and why?

How to recognise Emotional Empathy

The relationship between Emotional Empathy and Cognitive Empathy

Several detailed scenarios demonstrating for you in clear and understandable terms the interactions between empaths, normals and narcissists in respect of conflict and its resolution

Several detailed scenarios to help you understand the difference of response from those involved in conflict

Several detailed scenarios demonstrating the response of empaths, normals and narcissists so you understand how instinctive manipulations occur

Several detailed scenarios showing how Wounding and Challenge Fuel factor into the concept of Emotional Empathy and Cognitive Empathy

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17 thoughts on “Understanding Emotional Empathy : The Difference Between Empath, Normal and Narcissist

  1. annaamel says:

    There have been some discussions recently in what is turning into an epic thread about a spectrum of empathy.

    We are agreeing on the non empathic Ed pretty well but not so much at the empathic end.

    Thinking a bit more about this, I wonder if placing the various schools of empath on line from most empathic onwards may not be the best approach.

    Looking through the ‘Grimoire’ I see that the Super Empath is described at having heightened traits, rather than heightened empathy overall. So increased honesty, increased desire for justice and to right wrongs etc.

    But I would be surprised if the Super Empath was the best at listening, and I’d suspect they’d maybe not the best at loyalty either.

    I haven’t done the trait detector and am not sure what all the traits are that are connected to empaths.

    I think there’s positivity, honesty, truthseeking, good listening, compassionate (or is this empathy?) maybe loyalty….

    But my point is that it may be impossible to say what type of empath is most empathic as it’s more about how their empath manifests and which traits are present and at what levels.

    I’m scrapping my original spectrum which had COD as the most empathic because I don’t know if that’s the case. It’s more likely they’re going to be stronger in particular traits as well as having a greater potential for attachment.

    1. A Victor says:

      Hi Annaamel, I just wrote kind of a similar comment over on the epic thread! I think you are correct, there’s more to it than simply a measure of empathy.

    2. Leigh says:

      HI Annamel, I think Mr. Tudor has posted this somewhere but I can’t say for sure. The way I understand it is that CoDs are highest in empathic traits and lowest in narc traits. They have the widest gap between empath and narc traits. Standards are lower in empath traits and higher in narc traits but there’s still a wide gap between empath and narc traits. Supers have empath and narc traits that are even closer together. They have the smallest gap between them. I’m not sure where Contagion falls. At least that’s how I understand it.

      I know there’s a blogger who is half CoD, half super. I don’t want to call her out though. It would be great to have her input on where her traits fall?

      P.S. I highly recommend the trait detector. I found it incredibly useful.

      1. lickemtomorrow says:

        Hi Leigh,

        Just saw your comment on combination CoD and Super. I am majority CoD 54% (I think), minority Super 36% and Standard 10%. Not half and half, but the combination can become confusing when having these discussions. I know there are others here with this possible combination, but not sure who.

        It appears I may have landed a narc gene – as CoD’s are on the path of becoming narc’s before we miraculously transform (likely due to a possible intervention, empathic parent, etc.) which means the LOCE and genetic predisposition are in place, but disrupted somehow. The only means I can consider where this might have happened in my situation was with an empathic first grade teacher. There were no other interveners, but she got me right about the age of 6 years, although I always remember being a very empathic child also. I’m not sure how the genetic predisposition may have been displayed apart from entertaining some more ‘grandiose’ thoughts as a means of controlling my environment (fantasy stuff, basically).

        I will have to review the understanding around the Super empath because I’m aware of that being part of my makeup, but I’m unsure how it arises atm. The two notions seem to clash and a while ago, I think it was here, HG gave a very succinct explanation about how having the two in tandem was possible. I just can’t remember the details now.

        If you were wondering about traits (as in Cadres), I’d have to look them up again.

        1. Leigh says:

          Hi LET, yes, I was talking about you but I didn’t want to say your name if you didn’t want to share. I think the original question was from AV with regards to empath traits vs narc traits in CoDs. Then it kinda spiraled into where empaths fall in the spectrum with regards to empathic traits. I’m Standard and the percentage of my empath traits are higher (almost doubled) then my narc traits. I wonder as a combination of CoD and Super, what’s your mix because CoDs have high empath traits with low narc traits, but Supers can have both high empath and narc traits.

          I do remember Mr. Tudor explaining on the blog how your combination works. It was something like you give and give and give, then your super kicks in and draws a line in the sand. I’ll look for that comment and see if I can find it.

          I came across a conversation about CoDs and the GPD toward narcissism.
          Below are the links:

          I was under the same impression as you that CoDs have the GPD for narcissism but after reading those comments, I’m not sure if we were correct.

          1. lickemtomorrow says:

            Hi Leigh, no worries about referring to me, and I’m pretty sure there are some others with this combo, too. I want to check the links you posted and will look up my detectors, but I believe you are correct in saying Super’s are also high in narc traits which I seem to remember I am.

            I will get back to you soon. Re: Cadres – Saviour, Magnet, Martyr.

          2. A Victor says:

            Hi Leigh, I’m moderate empath traits, moderate low narc traits. But, as is started on the detector itself, they are not equal against each other. Empath’s will always have higher E traits, always. I go back to the spotlight and then candle flame, the spirit being much brighter and bigger and far outshining the candle. But in the case of a Supernova, the candle becoming like a bonfire for a bit almost, that’s how I picture it anyway. But then it reduces back once the event is done. My main point though was that we always have higher E traits where the normals are actually more equal.

          3. Leigh says:

            Hi AV, I understand the piece about all empaths have higher empath traits than narc traits. That’s what makes up empaths. I was just a bit confused about the spectrum. In my mind I was putting super next to normal because the gap between empath traits and narc straits is smaller in Supers and I understand normals to have a smaller gap too. I realize that thinking was incorrect because Standards have more empathy than normals but less than Supers. Sometimes it takes a minute for the lightbulb to go off. Thank you for sharing.

            I’m still looking forward to hear where LET falls with regards to empath and narc traits.

          4. Hi Leigh, responding to your further comment – considered separately my empathic traits are very high at 76% and my narc traits are moderately high at 57% (as per HG’s analysis); considered together I have a similar percentage of 57% empathic and 43% narcissistic with regard to my makeup as a whole (100%).

            When it comes to the links you shared, I guess the explanation could mean the ingredients of the cake weren’t quite right for narcissism to form in me, or someone (maybe my first grade teacher) switched off the oven before the cake could be properly baked. The possibility definitely existed, so it’s interesting to wonder how it never came about. I’m guessing it’s the same for you.

            Curious now how your trait levels turned out, but entirely up to you if you want to share, Leigh. Having shared mine, I’m not sure how far it goes towards solving the riddle of the combined CoD/Super Schools, or any way to determining how empaths score on a spectrum – same as HG sub-categorises narcissists within the category of being a narcissist, he sub-categorises empaths within the context of being an empath. The scale seems to only exist to show where narcissism and empathy fall, and that’s obviously at opposite ends!

          5. Leigh says:

            Hi LET, thank you for sharing. Of course I’m willing to share as well. When considered alone my empath traits were 68% and my narc traits were 39%. Overall they were 62% empath and 38% narc.

            For me it wasn’t about where we fall on the spectrum with regard to empath traits, it was more about where we fall with regards to narc traits. I know the conversation about an empath spectrum started on the Harry thread. In that conversation I remember seeing a comment that CoDs don’t have narc traits and that didn’t make sense to me. Especially since I know there’s a certain celebrity that’s CoD and they’re high in showcasing and pride. So it caused me to want to delve deeper.

            Thank you for sharing. It all helps my understanding in general.

    3. Contagious says:

      Hi! I think everything is a spectrum. Why wouldn’t it be with different genes and experiences! My own empath diagnosis from HG was standard contagian. There were small amounts of super, geyser and savior. I could see why he chose these traits as HG was right. I am a lawyer so standard seems fitting. My majority contagian was obvious to me. Super? Maybe if situation was so. Geyser if I must go to a party. Savior? My fundamental beliefs and religion. HG said “ doormat” but ok. I am a mix and in a spectrum but I think likely that all of you see can see a connection to his explanations of empath and apply it. X

      1. Jasmin (SOTF) says:

        Hi Contagious,

        You seem to mix up the schools with the cadres.
        The outcome or ‘diagnosis’ will be school + cadre (if not a hybrid, triple hybrid and so on).
        Do you want to say you’re a hybrid standard/contagion? (With the contagion being slightly higher).

        Your result will reach 100% with regard to both school/s and cadre/s. Super being a school. Geyser and Saviour are cadres. If both these cadres are in small amounts they won’t reach 100%.

        I don’t see any of the mentioned schools and cadres as being associated with ‘the doormat’ empath.

        1. A Victor says:

          Hi Jasmin, isn’t the CoD the doormat when combined with certain cadres? I’m probably not remembering it right.

          1. lickemtomorrow says:

            Hi AV, I think the Martyr Cadre can combine to create the ‘doormat’ effect. I know HG has an article on the ‘doormat’, but not sure if it refers to Schools or Cadres. Will need to look it up again.

          2. Jasmin (SOTF) says:

            I associate CoD and Martyr with the doormat empath.
            I don’t think that they necessarily have to combine. I can see a standard or contagion + martyr majority being a doormat for example. Not 💯 procent sure though..

        2. Contagious says:

          Perhaps but I see it as a spectrum. Per HG spectrum school. Majority contagious. Minority geyser, super, savior and cod. So small the others I think it’s the situation. It felt very right. What I lead with and on occasion could be.

      2. A Victor says:

        Hi Contagious, I read yesterday a comment you made to me in the really long Harry’s Wife thread. It wasn’t possible to comment from that spot but i do have thoughts, just wanted to let you know I saw it and as soon as life slows a bit, I will reply. Thanks for writing it! It was interesting!

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