The Revision of History

 

Our kind create illusions, generate a false reality and manipulate perceptions. Chief amongst such fabrications is our capacity to change what has gone before and revise history. This editing of our lives begins from the moment that we make our approach to you. That win at school in the 100m sprint becomes a triumph in the county championships instead or even victory for our country in a youth athletics meeting. When we played football we were a decent if workmanlike footballer but when we later recount these stories to a group of people that we wish to impress and draw into our façade, we were captain, scored fifty goals or more each season and won a handful of awards at the end of season presentations. Yes, we were signed on schoolboy terms with a major football club but decided we wanted to pursue our other interests. I have other interests? Of course I do, let me tell you about those as I engage in another bout of made-up glory or exaggerated accomplishments. Our kind operates by the maxim,

“If the story is not true about us it certainly ought to be.”

It isn’t unknown for us to keep newspaper clippings detailing the triumph of others and pointing to them as our own. If no name is mentioned but it is a team then we belonged to that team and yes, that is me in the centre, admittedly I have changed as I have got older but who hasn’t? Even the presence of a different name to our own will not necessarily deter us from seizing this piece of history and claiming it as ours. I had a different name then. Why? Well it was because of this….. This then allows me to engage in another fabrication which holds your attention and impresses you as I talk of parental influences causing name changes, witness protection schemes and the need for anonymity and so forth. You will be so caught up in my over bearing charm and the bright glare of my shining star that this will all sound plausible. We are always plausible that is how we get away with what we do. We revel in being grand and impressive and thus we will change who we are, where we came from and what we have achieved in order to fit the image that we wish to portray to the world at large. The bolder the better, as Joseph Goebbels declared,

“If you tell a lie big enough and keep repeating it, people will eventually come to believe it.”

We practise this approach throughout our engagement with you. We rely on your trust and your default setting of accepting what you are told by people. We are so self-assured in our statements, so convincing and able to point to detail that we are entirely plausible as explaining we are the top trader at our brokerage, the largest biller at the law firm, the number one sales person at the company and so forth. We gather this detail from those we have met. Accordingly, because we like to be associated with success we ensure we fraternise with those within our business who are successful. We bask in the reflected glory but listen to what they say so we may acquire that trait of their personality for ourselves. Once acquired we fasten it to ourselves and the portray it as part of us when we meet you in a bar and tell you about what we do. As an expert in mimicry, we not only copy behaviours and emotions for the purpose of duping you, we also duplicate the successes and achievements of others and call them our own. We do this so often that we regard them as our achievements.

We can tell you how we were the star decathlete at university and deflect any scepticism about why we do not do much exercise now by pointing to the knee injury that we have. Of course this invented knee injury was not sustained in a mundane incident when we were knocked from our bike in a leafy suburban street by an inattentive driver, goodness me no. This knee injury which put to an early end our ambition of Olympic stardom resulted from me tackling an armed robber in a bank and him striking my knee with the butt of his gun. The judge praised my bravery and the criminal was, I am pleased to report, apprehended. Yes, I received a reward too. This never happened but I did read about it in last week’s paper and thought that such information was very useful for me to acquire for my own use in creating this magnificent hero that I wish to be.

I apply this revisionist approach to my own history but it does not stop there. Everybody becomes affected by its taint. We will alter the course and nature of past friendships and relationships. That friend who no longer speaks to us has become jealous of our success in the workplace and cannot hide it so it is better that we have nothing to do with one another. The strength of our façade and the chirping propaganda chicks which occupy my coterie, along with the trumpeting proclamations from my Lieutenants ensures that it is my version of events which is heard most often, drowning out any dissent, so that what I say about someone becomes regarded as fact. Well, if everyone else says it as well, I must be right mustn’t I? The abusive ex-girlfriend who moved two thousand miles to escape my tendrils is not going to know to even try to contradict what I say about her. I can slander he repeatedly, explaining how she tried to control me and stop me going out with my friends and there is no opposing voice or version. My alteration to the truth goes unchallenged and I believe it, because in my mind she was trying to control me by stopping me gathering my fuel from having affairs with other people. Affairs? Friends? What’s the difference when it means I can con you into believing me, expressing your sympathy for me as a consequence of the horrible behaviour I endured and allowing me to coil a further tendril around you?

Everyone is subjected to these revisions. Family, friends, lovers, partners and colleagues. I am elevated and they are denigrated as my propaganda network pumps out the lies, embellishments and exaggerations in support of what I want you to hear and think.

Our revisionist behaviours do not stop there with how we portray ourselves and others but go on to infect our relationship. We must always have the upper hand and as I have mentioned before this means that we will shift the battlefield to suit us from day to day and from moment to moment. What better way of achieving this that to alter what has gone before?

“We did not agree to go out tonight, you have made that up.”

“I think you will find that I drove last time, so you can this time.”

“I didn’t go out last Friday; you are just inventing things now.”

“What pie? There wasn’t one there.” Said as I brush the pie crumbs from my shirt.

This need to evade blame, make you out to be the one at fault and to gather fuel from you will cause us to engage in the most extraordinary gymnastics of past events and conversations. It is often a knee-jerk reaction where the denial, deflection and revision is uttered before we even ascertain how ridiculous it may sound to you. That does not matter to us. We are not interested in whether you regard it as incredible, we must remain on higher ground to you, by whatever means and if this means saying it has not rained this afternoon, when it has and puddles can still be seen outside, then we will do it. I know this appears ridiculous but I know that those of you who have been subjected to this will testify to its astonishing nature. We do not care for the logic that you apply. All we care about is making sure we can stay away from blame, free of accountability, maintain control and draw fuel. You cannot believe that someone can lie so blatantly. You cannot believe that someone can change what has just happened in the blink of an eye to something else. This is what we want. Your astonishment and incredulity are such that you flow with fuel as you become amazed, flabbergasted, angry and upset. You will try and try to make us see that we are incorrect. Keep going, you are not going to succeed and all you will do is exhaust yourself and give us fuel. This maintenance of the ability to change what has gone before is instrumental in eventually causing you to doubt your own reality and begin to wonder if actually, perhaps we are right and you are wrong. This gas lighting will have you bewildered and confused and the application of a revisionist policy is instrumental in the application of this particular form of manipulation.

In the novel 1984 when the government changed the facts to suit the issue of the day, all previous references to said fact had to be deleted, revised or amended across all publications. We do exactly the same. There was never anything different to what we have asserted, it has always been the case and guess what? If we suddenly want to change it again, because it suits our agenda, we will do it without a hint of concern or embarrassment. It is breath-taking but highly damaging to you as you are caught in between what you know to be right and our bewildering insistence that you are wrong.

This revisionist nature of ours explains why one week you are on that pedestal and the following week you are in the dust and we never ever placed you on a pedestal. You can tell us until you are blue in the face that we once adored you and revered you, that we treated you like a queen and we will just shake our heads and call you delusional.

“Stop trying to change the facts.”

This accusation will be levelled at you as you try to convince us to the contrary and you will react even more as you are accused of the very thing that we are doing. This only means more confusion for you, more control for us and more fuel. Your desire to be correct and your desire to have us see this correctness (even though we won’t do so) keeps you on our merry go round and enables us to keep changing what has happened to suit our purposes.

This is done because we have to have the upper hand. It is done because we must always win. It is done because we must be the victor in this war between you and I.

As has been stated on many occasions, this is done because history is written by the winners.

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The Sex Hex

 

I was in session with Dr E.

“So,” I asked, “what is today’s topic for discussion?”

“Sex,” he replied.

“Do I have to talk about this with you?”

He pushed his spectacles back.

“You do not have to talk about anything, but I would hope you would discuss this with me.”

“Can’t I talk to Dr O about sex?”

“Why? Are you uncomfortable discussing sex with another man?” he asked. I could see he had his pen poised ready to make a note.

“Not at all. Sorry, doctor but there is no homophobia about me.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Well you were about to suggest that my reluctance to discuss matters of sex with you denotes a homophobic trait on my part.”

“Not at all, that would be prejudging you and an unsafe basis for analysis.”

“I don’t believe you,” I replied.

“Why would you rather discuss sex with Dr O?” he asked. He showed no sign of irritation or disappointment at my preference.

“I would be interested to learn her views about sex. She is so pristine and clinical when I see her, I want to know what goes on under the bonnet.”

“These sessions are about you not us,” said Dr E.

“Don’t worry Dr E I have no interest in whether you apply nettles to your scrotum or whatever it is you do to excite yourself.”

“Is that something you have done?” he asked.

“No but I have used them on someone else.”

“Male or female?”

“Female.”

“Why?”

“The stinging sensation across the nipples or the inner thighs of course hurts but then that gives way to a delicious flood of pleasure when combined with the application of my tongue.”

Dr E was scribbling.

“I see, so you enjoy the fact it hurts the other person and then becomes pleasurable for her?”

“No.”

“Please do expand.”

“Will I get to talk about sex with Dr O?” I asked, shifting topic.

“On some aspects of sex, yes,” replied Dr E. I smiled.

“Good. Very well since that is going to happen and I will hold you to that promise Dr E, I will expand on my point.”

“I do it because the issue of that person’s pain and then pleasure is entirely at my gift. I control it and that appeals to me considerably.”

“So control in an sexual encounter is important to you?” asked Dr E.

“Control is the sexual encounter for me. I have little interest in my own sexual gratification, yes it feels pleasant when I orgasm but ultimately I can do that myself and invariably with more intense results. I have even less interest in the sexual gratification of another person. Denying them that sexual gratification? Now that is far more enjoyable than granting them their release. Sex is all about control. I am highly skilled in between the sheets.”

“Is that your conclusion or of others?”

“Both. You see I know how people think, I know how they react and I have had many sexual encounters with many different people. There are vast numbers of different permutations when it comes to what satisfies a person and no two people are the same.  I am like a super computer. I can rattle through the various combinations until I hit the right approach which will send my bedroom companion into orbit. I am willing to apply every part of my body, every facet of my sexual knowledge in order to make that person feel utterly orgasmic. That gives me huge control over them and makes me very powerful. I know what turns them on, what makes them moan and scream and shudder in orgasmic bliss. I use this massively powerful ability of mine to bring them under my spell. Once that is done I will grant it and deny it as and when I see fit. I will purposefully do the things that does not arouse them in order to make them react. I will caress a partner in a public place and whisper in their ear that if they show any kind of reaction to what I am doing I will stop and deny them any sexual congress for an indefinite period. This gives them an earth shattering orgasm and underlines my control over them. I will interrupt a row with a girlfriend by taking her against the kitchen workbench. She soon forgets what the argument was about as I have her moaning in delight before I just walk off before she climaxes. Imagine how she follows me about the house begging for me to “finish her off”? Think of the promises she makes just to feel me inside her again? That is control. That is power. I work out a person’s sexual key code and deliver heaven. They find that addictive and want it so much. I find the power attached to this ability addictive. When you go to bed with me you are getting the best. Nobody afterwards will come close to what I give you.”

There was a long pause as Dr E jotted down my words. He looked a little flustered to me. I wished it was Dr O sat there instead.

“Do you think a sexual encounter should be about something other than control?”

I laughed at this comment,

“Heavens no, that is its only function. It is an instrument, like so many other things, to bring you under my spell, but I must admit, it is probably one of the most potent and effective instruments. Sex is actually rather boring but controlling the reaction and emotions of another person, well, now that is far more interesting.”

“Have you ever wondered what it would be like to give up that control and allow yourself to be enveloped in the ‘moment’ with the other person?” asked Dr E.

“No I cannot give up control. You see, I know there are those that engage in being tied up and punished, you know smacked with an open hand or a cane. They may get a sexual reaction from being treated like this but the real reason they do it is that they are giving up control. I had a girlfriend who was very submissive and allowed me to do…well I will let you use your imagination there doctor, but she wanted zero control. She was high up in a bank and responsible for millions of pounds and hundreds of employees and she wanted to be divested of that responsibility and give up her control if only for an hour or two. I found her explanation interesting but I could not understand it. Why give up control? Why surrender something you have worked hard to achieve? Control is the ultimate aim of taking someone to bed. I control them in that bed and the spell I put on them means that control extends far beyond the bedroom, such is its power.”

Dr E nodded and continued writing.

“What if you lost your sexual potency? What if you became impotent?” he asked.

“Why would that happen?”

“Plenty of reasons. Alcohol abuse, substance abuse, diabetes, age, anxiety. There are many reasons why this could happen.”

I shook my head.

“People like me don’t suffer that. God gave me the gift of sexual brilliance to further my purposes, He would not take it away from me.”

“But if it did happen, what would you do? How would you manage with such a loss of this marvellous instrument of control?”

“Are you taking the piss now doctor?” I snapped.

“Not at all. Just posing a relevant question aligned to your desire for control.”

“Listen doctor, don’t project your problems in that department onto me, okay?”

Dr E remained silent. I copied him and just sat in silence glaring at him. How dare he suggest I would lose my potency? What an idiot. He ought to know better than that by now. I kept staring at him waiting for his next clever remark but he just stared back. This stand-off went on for a few minutes but I knew he would look away first. I maintained my baleful gaze as the fury at his impertinence coursed through me and then he lowered his eyes to his black and red notepad and made some more notes. I had won.

“Not so cocky now are we doctor?” I muttered under my breath.

Learn more about the narcissist’s view of sex in the book Sex and the Narcissist available on Amazon.

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Knowing the Narcissist

Knowing the Narcissist now has a YouTube channel

I am extending my reach

It can be found at the link below

New and insightful content will be available shortly

If there is a topic you would like me to talk about or a question you would like answered please do ask and I will endeavour to include it in my broadcasts

I look forward to you welcoming me onto your screen

Thank you for your continued interaction

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCge1h5fEmC4sU1fN6TgevIA

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Further Confessions of a Narcissist

Now Available

Further confessions from the dark-hearted narcissist. Why does he exhibit his attitude to money? What is his response to the question of your needs? Did he ever actually love you? What was that which he showed you during your dance with him? How does he know so quickly who will provide him with the most potent fuel? These questions and many others are answered in this unforgettable foray into the mind and behaviours of a narcissist.

US    http://www.amazon.com/Further-Confessions-Narcissist-H-Tudor-ebook/dp/B0186D8ZA4

UK    http://www.amazon.co.uk/Further-Confessions-Narcissist-H-Tudor-ebook/dp/B0186D8ZA4

CAN   http://www.amazon.ca/Further-Confessions-Narcissist-H-Tudor-ebook/dp/B0186D8ZA4

AUS    http://www.amazon.com.au/Further-Confessions-Narcissist-H-Tudor-ebook/dp/B0186D8ZA4

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Five Intangible Thefts

 

We are takers and not givers. We drain, bleed, leech and suck dry. Whether it is occupying your home, using your car, borrowing money which we do not repay or something as simple as drinking your last can of soda, our kind are recidivists in the art of stealing. We are entitled to anything and everything, nothing is exclusively yours. We suck what you own and possess down into the plughole of our emptiness in an attempt to fill our vast black hole.This not only applies to material items and those things which are tangible. Upsetting and frustrating as it is when we help ourselves to your money and your possessions there are five things which we always take which are far more precious. These are high priorities for us to take from you. These are  five intangibles that we always steal and this is why we do it.

 

1. Self-esteem

At the beginning of our interaction you are self-assured without being cocky or boastful. You know what you like, you are proud of your accomplishments and achievements without feeling any need to crow about them. I am jealous of your self-esteem and I want it for myself. I wish I could have that sense of independence and knowing your place and role in the world and being content with it. I have to gain my self-esteem from the views and comments of others and I long to have it already in place just as you have. My bilious jealousy means that I want to shatter your self-esteem through my repeated put-downs, my reminders of your failings and the trumped-up elevation of my brilliance over you. I want to snatch it away from you, use some of it for myself and with the remainder I want to rip it apart leaving you unsure, uncertain and clinging to me. I want to reverse the roles so that you look at me and wish you had what I have.

2. Self-confidence

You may not me a demagogue. You may not stand before a sea of faces and hold them in your rapt attention but you knew that you did certain things well. You had confidence in your abilities, your likeable characteristics and you also knew where you had failings and weaknesses. You addressed those vulnerabilities and you never made them someone else’s problem. Once again my envy is such that I want this self-confidence. I know how to portray it with my boasting and bragging, always turning heads as I make a grand entrance, easily able to play to the crowd at a function as I am driven on by my knowing I am superior, I am entitled to this crowd’s attention and everyone should be praising me because I am worth praising. I suck the self-confidence from you, absorbing into me, powering my being with what you once had. My conjuring and manipulation is designed to drain you of your self-confidence to ensure that you rely on me all the more, turning to me for approval, seeking my permissions and always requiring my say so. You have to ask me first if you can see your friends, your conversations are never private as I am always listening in, you run every decision past me now for you are so fearful of making a mistake and incurring my wrath, be it a silent baleful glare or the blazing, spittle-flecked oral assault.You even ask if you may use the bathroom, such is the erosion of your self-confidence to make a decision for yourself.

3. Critical Thinking

You once were a pretty good judge of character, able to rationalise and evaluate but you did not reckon with the force that is my love-bombing. You should not be ashamed for few recognise it for what it really is and all too soon they become entangled in the seemingly wonderful golden period, unaware they have now been ensnared. We need to attack your critical thinking capability and damage it to the point of no function. If you are able to evaluate what we are doing, there is the possibility of you working us out and stopping the provision of the fuel that we need. There is a chance that you will escape us. We must not allow that to happen and through our gas lighting of you in particular, our repeated and sustained lying and the incessant barrage which exhausts you, we whittle away your ability to reason and think. The throbbing headache which never really goes away, the tiredness around your eyes and the sense of utter fatigue plays havoc with your ability to think straight and see what is really happening. It is far easier just to accept what we say as the truth. It is easier to go along with what we want. You can no longer distinguish reality from illusion as we hammer away until your critical thinking capability has been smashed.Now we can keep you in our grip without fear of you working things out.

4. Credibility

Once upon a time you were always believed. Your word was regarded as the truth and people accepted this. You were not questioned but rather when you explained something or recounted an incident you were believed. Not any more. We take your credibility and batter it into nothingness through the repeated application of character assassinations and smear campaigns. We put you down, we scold and chastise, we tell you how wrong you are, how worthless you are and that you are nothing without us until you start to doubt yourself. We do not stop there however. Your credibility is shattered with every one else. We need to smear your name to your friends, family, colleagues and neighbours so everyone realises that you are a habitual liar. You tell such terrible lies about me and them that nobody can believe you any longer. Add to this your exhaustion and generally histrionic presentation as a consequence of our other manipulations, when compared with our calm appearance then your credibility vanishes. We take it further so that you are not believed in situations dealing with your employer, the school, the authorities and so forth so that you find yourself in some Kafka-esque nightmare where you always feel like the accused and you are never believed. No we have free reign to spin our propaganda and maintain our superiority.

5. Trust

We finally take your ability to trust and we destroy it. You may think it odd that we might destroy your ability to trust us but that does not matter. If you no longer trust us we will still do as we please, we will still make out that it is your fault that we do what we do and because we have eroded your self-esteem, shattered your self-confidence, maligned your critical thinking and removed your credibility we will always triumph. It does not matter to us that we have removed any trust you once had for us because this removal is not going to stop us doing what we want to do. The trust that really matters, the trust that we have taken from you comes later. In the event that you escape us, whether it is through your own doing or staying free from us once we have discarded you, it is what comes next where the eradication of your ability to trust matters. We leave you always doubting those that you meet. We have you unable to trust someone who has taken an interest in you. Is this person like us? Are they showing signs similar to how we behaved? How can you tell whether they are genuine or not? You are no longer able to trust your own judgement and you are no longer able to trust those who might just happen to be genuine and make you happy. It is this final intangible theft that we commit which leaves the harshest and enduring legacy.

 

 

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A Question of Responsibility

 

It is well-known that our kind does not do responsibility. We are not to be held to account. We are never culpable. Nothing is ever our fault. We are free to act as we please, doing what we want without concern for repercussion or consequence. Responsibility does not figure in our considerations. There is a considerable deficit on our side of the equation when it comes to shouldering responsibility. Nature abhors a vacuum however and therefore since we create such an absence of responsibility, this raises the question who is going to step in and accept responsibility? Who is going to take on more than their fair share of accountability? Who is going to plug the culpability gap? The answer, of course, is you and this is a significant reason why you remain chained to us and naturally, we know this to be the case. This is one of the reasons why we choose people like you.

As an empathic individual you have many traits which appeal to us. One of these traits is having a strong moral compass so that you “do the right thing” and you accept responsibility for your actions. That is attractive to us in itself. However, you go further than this. You are blessed or cursed, dependent on how you regard it, with the fact that you are over-responsible. Not only will you rightly accept blame when it is genuinely your fault but you will accept responsibility for us as well. This is extremely appealing. How does this over-responsibility come about?

On the one hand it is something which is intrinsic to you as a consequence of being an empathic person. You feel a deep responsibility for others and you do so because you wish to help. You do not believe that it is right to shirk responsibility or walk away when someone is in need. You widen your scope of responsibility by adopting the stance that as a decent human being you have a responsibility to aid others, assist them and help them. Added to that is the fact that we cause you to be responsible for us. We deny responsibility so you immediately feel a need to plug that gap – I return below to why you feel that need. Moreover, we make it your responsibility through our repeated projection and blame-shifting.

“It is always your fault.”

“You made me get angry, it is your fault.”

“Now look what you have made me do.”

“You should have known that was going to annoy me.”

This frequent projection and blame-shifting conditions you to accept responsibility for what we have done or not done. The more aware of our kind know that by reinforcing this double edged message – we are not responsible/ it is your fault – you will accept this to be the case. You are prone to repeated self-analysis and in order to find solutions, keep the peace and avoid those eggshells you will accept responsibility for us. An objective observer would find a certain action to be clearly our fault but you will take on the mantle of responsibility on our behalf.

“It’s my fault, I should have known.”

“He is tired, that is why he shouts at me, I should have let him rest.”

“I should have remembered that he doesn’t like fish.”

“It’s okay, I am used to it, I don’t mind because he can be wonderful to me you know.”

“It is just the way he is, I pick up the pieces, that is what I am here for.”

The repeated reinforcement that you are to blame coupled with your natural propensity for wanting to accept responsibility means that we know we can easily have you burdened with accountability and you will invariably accept it. This then paves the way for us to inflict other manipulations against you based on your acceptance of fault and guilt. You accept you are at fault so then we are entirely justified in shouting at you, cold-shouldering you, stopping you going out or having an affair. Having you as the one to blame suits our purposes to maintain our perceived superiority and provides us with justification for punishing you so that we receive further negative fuel.

This over-responsibility will extend into making excuses on our behalf when we have stormed out of a family occasion. It is our secretary ringing a client and apologising for us when we have been rude to somebody. It is a sibling who tries to play down our outrageous behaviour and finding something to explain it without pinning the blame where it ought to be pinned; on us. You accept that you are to blame and you become our spokesperson when dealing with other people as you are left to defend the indefensible. Not that you will get any thanks for any of this of course.

Why then do you feel such a need to be over-responsible for us? Where does this trait stem from? I have seen it within my own family with my sister. From an early age you have been subjected to such blaming behaviour when it was never actually your fault. This causes you to believe that there must be something wrong with you and that you are not good enough. In order to deal with this sense of inadequacy that was instilled in you most likely in your childhood you seek to over-compensate and decide that you will become good enough by being the receptacle for all blame, irrespective of real culpability. You have been convinced that you deserve this abuse, this blame and it is your duty to shoulder responsibility for what we do and what we do not do, in order to become worthwhile. It is easier to accept blame than fight against it because this is fulfilling the role that has been created for you. Always being to blame has caused you think that you deserve it and in order to do something about that state of affairs, you address it by accepting even more blame in order to reach an accord with what you regard your role to be.

We know that you need to feel responsible. It is a central plank of the empath’s constitution and we will exploit this by always blaming you, passing responsibility onto you and walking away from accountability. We will not laud you for such a selfless act of accepting responsibility but rather seize the opportunity to use it to justify our further foul treatment of you. You are at fault. You therefore deserve to be punished. You accept this and the repeated application of this only serves to reinforce and extend your sense of being responsible for us.

It is akin to being given six of the best with a cane at school for something you did not do and then asking,

“Please sir, can I have some more?”

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Practice Makes Perfect

I have made mention of how the advancements in technology have provided my kind and I with a smorgasbord of methods to carry out our works. From seduction to manipulation the freedom that comes with wifi and a functioning device provides is with a wealth of opportunity. My web can be spread wide over the….well the web. How apt it is that the pioneers of the internet decided on the appellation of world wide web. The electronic blanket which encapsulates this planet is indeed a web. A perilous place which readily ensnares the unwary. From chatrooms, to text messaging, through Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, e-mail and dating sites, the internet has proven to be bountiful in its riches for my kind. Of course, this vast array of different hunting grounds can only be of benefit to the seasoned hunter. You can fill a river with salmon but if you do not know how to fish then you will not catch anything. Of course, I know how to fish, to shoot, to spear and to hunt. My mastering of the tools of manipulation enables me to sniff out my prey in moments and like a lion tracking a bison, drag them to the ground and eat them from behind before they even realise what has happened to them. Have you ever seen the expression on a felled bison or buffalo as a predatory lion gorges on their flesh? It is not pain, it is not frustrated struggle but an almost blissful ignorance to what is actually happening. They seem unaware that they are being devoured. It is so similar for my victims. They smile and purr even as I am taking chunks from them because that is the high level of my skill.

Thus the internet has become my hunting ground and my various manipulative machinations are given a good run out amidst the waiting and willing victims. There is one thing however that always works in this electronic shop window and that is the art of conversation.

My early forays in chatrooms bore fruit so incredibly quickly. Even I was taken aback at how easy it was. So many times I read comments such as

“It is such a lovely change to meet someone who can hold a conversation.”

“You are so charming and interesting, you actually hold a conversation than saying hi babe wanna shag?”

“You are clearly intelligent and interested in me. I am not used to that. So many of the men on here just want a picture of my boobs or want to send me a dick pic, you are not like that.”

Naturally, I was not engaged in conversations with men so I do not know if there is a boorish equivalent amongst the female ranks. Certainly in all my conversations I never came across any lady whose opening gambit was to offer a picture of her genitals. I take the view therefore that it is the male of the species that is letting you down. They are certainly not letting me down. By populating chat rooms and dating sites and trotting out such Neanderthal lines these men are increasing my currency. The fact I can talk about a variety of subjects, ask pertinent and engaging questions and avoid suggesting a bunk up in the first ten mintues meant that I really was the desired exception. The idiots, the perverts and the inarticulate all made me look even better than I already did (yes I know that may be hard to believe!) and thus when I came sashaying into view I was greeted with utter delight by those I interacted with. Even if I had no interest in someone, I was hard pressed not to attract them, by virtue of being able to string sentences together and not engage in demands for instant sexual congress (of course that would come later when I was always pushing on an open door).

Time and time again I heard reports of the pathetic and ill-mannered behaviour of men in these arenas. I expressed dismay and castigated them for it but all the while I celebrated for so long as they continued in this vein it meant all the more eager and willing victims for me. Those weak and pathetic spiders would soon curl up and dye for there was only one giant walking through the net. Along came a spider but this one could hold a conversation.

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Read and understand all about narcissists from the best source possible. A narcissist himself.

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