A number of days ago I revealed to you that a new series entitled Dolus Malus would commence. And so it begins….
I am told that what I am is a creation, an artifice, a manufactured self that’s purpose is to defend me and to achieve my greater glorification. It is built on a foundation of elements and traits which are me which are then bound up with, strengthened, fortified and weaponised through the addition of characteristics and behaviours. Many of these are deployed instinctively, many of them also arise through calculated application. A conscious and choice selection designed to further my interests.
Do I remember who I was before this happened? It is vague and amorphous. I am told and reminded and detailed about who I once was – a further creation arising from the comments, observations, anecdotes and recollections of others. But they cannot be relied on. They cannot be trusted. An assembly of liars who tell me that I was this and that I did that, but they are traitors, all of them. Their lies and sedition pouring from those clockwork mouths, jaws moving up and down as they issue forth their venomous untruths as they seek to control me not only now but control me from revising my past.
They talk of ‘another time’ yet there is no evidence of this, no clear and distinct memories of mine to corroborate what they say. I only know what I am now. Effective.
“You were never filled with hatred as you are now,” says one.
“He has always been a hateful little boy,” says the other.
Who to believe? Who to trust? Who to rely on?
None of them. Not a single one. All of them are liars and thus do you understand why there can never be any reliance on these mendacious ministers as they preach one way whilst acting the other way? Do you understand why my path must be my path alone, away from the corrupting chatter and toxic tittle tattle? Do you understand why I attach but never become attached?
Perhaps you do not fully, but the central tenet of Dolus Malus will enable you to understand. You will understand more about me and in turn this will enable you yo understand more about the person or people who are those like me, those who have entered your world and impacted upon you.
You will learn the origins of their deceitful design against me. The effect of this and how my purpose, my intent and my raison d’etre has arisen from this behaviour towards me and now the reason for my behaviour towards them.
You will be familiar with the concept of a cabal, that is a small group of people, united in some close design usually to promote their own interests and a cabal usually carries negative connotations with regard to conspiracy and secrecy.
The name may have originated from the initials of a group of ministers of Charles II of England (Clifford, Arlington, Buckingham, Ashley and Lauderdale) and it is a cabal that I have dealt with, a cabal that engaged in dolus malus.
Just as each letter of the word cabal links to one of the ministers mentioned above, then you should understand and be prepared for the fact that Dolus Malus deals with a cabal of ten that has sought to deceive and do down me.
Ten letters.
A group of ten.
Each letter ascribing to a part of this group.
Dolus Malus.