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THE MOCKERY OF MIMICRY

I love to copy. I have to copy. It is all I have known for as long as I can remember. It is my natural setting to mimic those around me. I have to fit in, I have to belong and the most effective way for me to achieve this is to replicate everything that I come into contact with. If I interact with an esteemed academic I will listen to his or her achievements and then pass those off as my own as I peel away their glittering accolades and apply them to myself.

Should I spend time with an exceptional sporting individual then their record-breaking endeavours will be purloined for my benefit and sported as my own in furtherance of my own belief in my exceptional ability. Author? Yes I have written books too. Model? Yes I do some modelling from time to time. Chef? You should try my signature dish, it is heavenly. Everyone I have dealings with presents me with an opportunity to copy an element of their personality. character or personae so that I may then present it as my own and in so doing I shine brighter and become an even more attractive prospect to those whose lives I effortlessly infiltrate.

This skill at mimicry enables me to ghost in and out of people’s lives. I know the social norms which are applicable and through careful examination and application I am able to pass as one just like you. I am a facsimile of a decent, personable and engaging individual and this allows me access to my targets without raising any alarms. My veneer of respectability has been fashioned from all those that I engage with, gathering patches, fragments, shards and pieces until they are hewn together and I drape it about me allowing me to come and go as I please.

It is however with you that I exhibit the astonishing mimicry of which I am a master. Once I have selected you as my target I have learned much about you already. With what will eventually be recognised as alarming ease, I replicate a fondness for all those things which you like and a distaste for all those things that you dislike.

Think back and you will readily recall how I love horse-riding just as you did, that I enjoyed swimming in open water just like you and my passion for the works of Geoffrey Chaucer matched yours. Those interests which were close to you became interests that were close to me.

Your appreciation of an excellent bottle of Chateau Margaux was matched by my ability to remember the applicable tasting notes and recite them to you as if it was my own appreciation. I would mimic the way you sat, copying your body language because I know, from extensive practice that this paves the way to bonding with you. I would mimic your speech patterns to form a sub-conscious link between us.

I liked blue because you liked blue. I found listening to soul music an offence to my ears but I maintained a false enjoyment of it since you liked it so much. I actually enjoy choosing from the Crustacea bar but your dislike of seafood meant that I too turned lobster and oysters away. How often did you remark aloud, to me or to your friends,

“We have so much in common.”

“We like so many of the same things it is wonderful.”

“We share so many interests, I love it.”

“We are so well matched. On every level. We really are soulmates.”

Of course we are. I made it so because I wanted to be everything you wanted. I took your  long list of likes and dislikes, your catalogue of loves and hates and your grimoire of hopes and fears and I copied each and every page. I am a walking photocopier and I copied everything you wanted in order to ensure that my seduction of you was successful, encompassing and absolute.

Yet, my astonishing powers of mimicry did not end there. Goodness me no, there was more yet to come. In a particularly unpleasant twist to this malevolent skill of mine I would mimic your responses to my devaluation of you but this time it would not be a complete facsimile, I would make a slight change to my copying so that you would be undermined even further.

When you stood there crying with frustration and I drank deep of the delicious fuel you provided me, I would raise my hands to my eyes and draw pretend tears on my cheeks and make a sobbing noise to humiliate you further. Here I was letting you know that I copied everything that went before yet now I copy again but not with the perfection I once exhibited.

I allow the sting of sarcasm and the malicious mockery to infiltrate my copying of your behaviour so that your hurt and bewilderment was increased. You would shout at me and I would shout back using the exact words before standing and laughing at you as you burned with frustration, unable to find any response. You might stamp your feet in exasperation and I would do the same but with a leer of disdain writ large across my face.

There were times when you would scream. A terrified scream as my vicious manipulations would take their toll and as you tried to curl into a ball and hope you might just disappear and escape this nightmare, I would lean in close to you and mimic your scream into your ear, creating this fabricated falsetto of distress in order to further your own. Every reaction to my devaluation of you had the potential to be met by a mimicked reply from me in order to further your misery and demonstrate I did not treat your responses with any sincerity or concern.

I am the master of mimicry, the king of copying and the duke of duplication.

I am a walking and talking photocopier machine.

I put the rank in Rank Xerox.

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1. You never….

The precursor to a criticism of how you do not do something for me. It is a twin explosive assault against you because not only do I tell you that you are failing me by not doing something for me I also choose something that you actually do carry out. By suggesting that you no longer do a particular act or say a certain thing, when you actually do so, I intend to leave you speechless with exasperation and confused as to just how I can say such a thing. You will be stunned by such a blatant contradiction and this will result in your emotional response coming to the fore, rather than a reasoned one. All the better fuel for us.

2. You always….

The flipside of the above and likely to be tossed in your direction not long after the above narc grenade. The allegation of “you always” will be followed by some put-down and criticism highlighting a behavioural trait of yours which we deem unsatisfactory. Once again we will actually highlight something that you do not do in order to perplex you. You will defend yourself against this scandalous accusation and once again erupt in an emotional manner.

3. I’m sick of you controlling me.

Thrown at you in order to project our own rampant control of you. This is also used to deflect any criticism of us when you chastise us for our behaviour. Any attempt from you to point out the error of our ways or even to try to help us in some way will be met with this response. We do believe that you are trying to control us, by trying to break our own control of you and we cannot allow this to happen. It is through our control that we gain what we want from you and therefore any threat to this must be met with something that will knock you off balance. Accusing you of the very thing that we are doing will cause such astonishment and consternation that our aim is fulfilled.

4. My ex wouldn’t do this

A narc grenade of triangulation and who better to do it with than your predecessor. By implying that your predecessor has some form of superiority to you, after all the smearing of her name we did when we first ensnared you, not only will you be taken aback by this sudden volte face, you will also be mightily offended at being compared to someone who we hate so viciously. Drawing you down to her apparent level always brings forth a reaction from you.

5. My ex would do it

Another flipside whereby we are seeking to coerce you to do something for us, something which you are evidently reluctant to do. You have reservations and no doubt with good reason, but that does not matter to us. You are our extension and therefore you ought to be complying with our wishes without hesitation or refusal. By triangulating you again with she who went before you we are threatening that you are inferior to her and raising the prospect that you will be soon dispensed with if you do not do what we want.

6. I love you but I don’t like you right now

This carefully crafted narc grenade will shatter you as it appears as a compliment before ripping your heart out as you struggle to comprehend what we have just said.Surely if we love you, then we must also like you? What do we mean by saying this? It creates confusion and will have you trying to persuade us to both love and like you. What we mean when we lob this grenade towards you is “You say you love me but you will not do what I want.”

7. If you loved me….

We know that you are a love devotee. A passionate supporter and believer in the concept of love and we use this as grenade to about compliance. We know that you take pride in your integrity and decency and therefore you have standards to always uphold. By suggesting that your failure to act in the manner we want or that your disagreeing with us is somehow representative of you loving us less, we are challenging what you stand for. This will always force you to react by stating your case, reacting in an emotional fashion and ultimately doing what we want, in order to prove that you do indeed love us.

8. You are over reacting

A favourite to make you react even more. You take matters seriously and there are many things that we shall do which will cause you to respond in a serious and concerned fashion. By using this grenade, we belittle you and cause the issue to be about your reaction rather than what we have actually done.It acts as a brilliant way to deflect discussion and dissection of our behaviour and instead causes you to try to prove that you are not over-reacting, which will invariably actually heighten your response.

9 I can’t deal with this right now

Our grenade that is thrown in order to provide us with an escape route from any crisis or situation that requires us to be either accountable or supportive. We do neither and we want to keep it this way. We will invent some other reason which means that we have to depart or that you have to deal with this situation as we hurl the grenade, leaving you to catch it and deal with the subsequent explosion as we walk away, free from involvement, responsibility and culpability.

10 I don’t remember

The blast from this grenade is used to eradicate the problem that you are facing us with. Whether it is an accusation that we have failed to something or evidence of misbehaviour, this grenade is a failsafe way of enabling us to escape the problem. Often it will be used even when it is blatantly clear that we can remember, making your flabbergasted reaction all the more satisfying. There may be irrefutable evidence that we know and can remember but this never stops us from hurling this grenade at you and making good our escape from your attempt to blame us.

SO WRONG

My ex? Where do I begin? You know, I must admit, I have a propensity to always being right. I cannot help me. It is just the way I am. I work hard to get things right, in my job, who my friends are, making the right decisions in my life and most of all in respect who I choose to spend my intimate days with, but I will hold my hands up on this one. I got it wrong. Spectacularly wrong. I am normally an excellent judge of character.

It is an uncanny knack I have, call it a sixth sense if you will. I can usually tell when I meet somebody for the first time whether I will get along with them. I can gauge whether we will become firm friends and enjoy one another’s company. It happens with everyone including you.

What did my sixth sense tell me about you? Oh that we have so much in common and we are destined to be together. Don’t ask me why but I just knew it from the moment we met. There is just something about you. This sixth sense has never let me down before but it did with her, I got that all wrong. She was just the wrong person for me but I must have let her charm me or something because I just did not see her for what she really was. She appeared so right yet she was wrong on so many levels.

Don’t worry, I know I have not made the same mistake with you, you are different, there is nothing wrong about you. Everything was good at first, I think she managed to pull the wool over my eyes and hide from me whatever it is that is wrong with her. I am still not sure but it was not long before it all went wrong. We had a good time at first, no I will be honest, we had a great time. I put a lot of effort into my relationships. I firmly believe that there should be no half measures.

If you want to be with someone then you must give your all to them. There should be complete trust and your heart should only ever be theirs. I did this but it soon appeared that it was not enough. I don’t know what I did wrong, other than actually get into a relationship with her, but it all turned sour. I still don’t know what I did wrong. Whereas she was once attentive and kind, I think it was all a ruse now when I look back, she then showed little interest in me and doing things together.

She focussed on her job, her home and her hobbies, almost as if I became an afterthought. When I tried to point this out to her she would just go crazy, I mean full on looney tunes. It was scary the way she would just turn on me and point out all the things that I had done wrong. It made no sense. I gave her everything and yet no matter what I did it was always wrong. I just could not please her.

There is something very wrong with her. I could go into detail but you don’t need to hear all about that. I think it is sufficient to say I made a huge mistake entering a relationship with her, I got it entirely wrong, but I have learnt from that error and it will not happen again. I know I have got it right this time.

I was right about you. You are wrong, everything about you is wrong. I knew from the start but I thought I would give you a chance to prove me wrong. I wanted to help you. I saw something in you and thought that things would be all right despite the wrongness that surrounded you.

Yet everything I did to makes thing right you just threw back in my face didn’t you? You just had to make everything go wrong didn’t you? You would say the wrong thing, at the wrong time in the wrong situation. You would make wrong decisions, based on the wrong facts and choose the wrong option. You got with the wrong friends and did the wrong things with them for our relationship.

You showed the wrong tendencies and you committed so many wrongs I must have forgotten as many as I have remembered them. You are inherently wrong; it runs right through you. You taint everything about you with your wrongness and most of all you made our relationship go wrong. I did nothing wrong. I tried to make things right between us.

I persevered and held on as best I could as the wrongs rained down on me. I wanted us to work together but not only were you on the wrong page compared to me, you were reading from the wrong book. You gave me the wrong things, made the wrong comments and did the wrong acts. You infected our relationship with your wrong views and attitude. Everything went wrong and it was all down to you, yet you cannot even accept you are wrong can you?

You just kept asking me the wrong questions and giving me the wrong answers. I knew you had something wrong about you as soon as we met but something inside persuaded me to give you a chance to make things right, that you just needed that opportunity and you would grasp it and be thankful that somehow you could crawl from that wrong place you inhabited and that for the first time, suitably encouraged and supported, that you would start to do the right thing.

I was so right about how very wrong you are.

You wronged me but you will see now that I am going to put things right and I will do so in a way that ensures you will do no wrong ever again.

Right?

THE BREAKING OF YOUR NO CONTACT

“I have gone no contact but the narcissist keeps on texting me.”

That is not no contact.

“I have gone no contact but I keep seeing him driving past where I live”

That is not no contact.

” I have gone no contact but he keeps turning up at my house and we end up talking and it always ends in an argument.

That is not no contact.

 

I recently conducted one of my polls. I asked the question “How were you hoovered after ´no contact´?”. Notice that ´no contact´was in inverted commas? This was because although the label of no contact is used, it was not actually no contact.

I have published below the outcome of the poll :-

 

 

  • The narcissist text messaged me (16%, 170 Votes)
  • The narcissist telephoned me (11%, 115 Votes)
  • The narcissist e-mailed me (10%, 106 Votes)
  • The narcissist smeared me to others (9%, 91 Votes)
  • The narcissist contacted me through a friend, colleague, family member (either mine or theirs) (7%, 72 Votes)
  • The narcissist sent a message through social media (6%, 67 Votes)
  • The narcissist drove past a location where I was (home/work/mall) (6%, 58 Votes)
  • The narcissist approached me at my home (5%, 57 Votes)
  • The narcissist stood watching me from a distance (4%, 46 Votes)
  • The narcissist posted about me online and inferred it was directed at me (4%, 44 Votes)
  • The narcissist approached me at my work (4%, 39 Votes)
  • The narcissist approached me outdoors (in the street, on the way to my car) (4%, 38 Votes)
  • The narcissist sent a gift (3%, 31 Votes)
  • The narcissist returned property (3%, 29 Votes)
  • The narcissist approached me at a social venue (bar, club, gym, pool etc) (3%, 28 Votes)
  • The narcissist wrote a physical letter to me (2%, 25 Votes)
  • The narcissist damaged my property (2%, 23 Votes)
  • The narcissist posted about me online and referenced me directly (1%, 15 Votes)

 

Look at the type of hoover which topped the poll.

The narcissist text messaged me

No wonder you received a hoover, you did not impose no contact. You either failed to block the narcissist´s telephone number so he was able to text message you and/or you failed to change your number so that even if you blocked the narcissist, he or she could text you from a different number.

Block or better still change your number.

 

The second highest vote was

The narcissist telephoned me

The same point re the text message hoover applies here. If the number was withheld so it got through, do not answer. Do not answer any call where the number is withheld. There is no need to answer it. A withheld number can only mean it is a narcissist trying to contact you or it is a telemarketing narcissist trying to sell you a conservatory or asking if you have recently suffered an accident which was not your fault. Nothing good will ever come of answering a withheld number.

 

The third highest vote was

The narcissist e-mailed me

Block the email address or change yours.

 

37% of hoovers arose from electronic means. I have warned you all before that maintaining any form of electronic conduit between you and the narcissist amounts to The Wrong No Contact.

Closing the electronic conduit is one of the easiest parts of imposing a no contact regime yet you fall prey to your emotional thinking and fail to do it. Examples of that emotional thinking include

“If I keep open the telephone route between us, he will be less likely to come around to my house.”

Not necessarily so. You may actually be encouraging him to come around to your house by providing fuel and lowering the hoover bar so the narcissist becomes bolder. Even if blocking the number forces the narcissist into attending on your property, guess what, we cannot walk through walls or doors. Do not answer the door to the narcissist.

 

“I have not blocked the number because I want to show I can resist his hoover.”

You do not need to show this at all. Apply GOSO. You are playing with emotional thinking and run the risk of it soaring when that text message hoover arrives (and it will) so that you are drawn into replying and then the vicious circle of engagement and increased emotional thinking begins.

 

“I want to collect evidence of what he is like.”

What for? If it is to prove to other people such as friends or family, forget it. You are just continuing a form of engagement and being held in the ensnarement for longer through emotional thinking. You know that this person is a narcissist, that is all you need to know. You do not need to prove this to anybody else.

If you need it for a court case ask yourself, do you really? Have you not already got the evidence because in all likelihood you will have? What are you trying to prove? You would be far better served obtaining independent evidence rather than being drawn into a prolonged ensnarement thinking you are evidence gathering.

 

“I need to be able to tell the narcissist how much she has hurt me and I feel safer doing so through a text message or e-mail.”

No you do not. You know the person is a narcissist. We do not care, you are just giving us fuel, you are just encouraging us to hoover you all the more, we will reject your attempt to pin accountability on us (this manifests as you trying to control us and we can never allow that to happen) and you will just get drawn into a war of electronic words which will fuel us, increase your risk of further hoovers,  make you feel any or all of angry/upset/frustrated/hurt/helpless and cause your emotional thinking to rise.

“I want to see how long it is before he leaves her and tries to get me back.”

You want a narcissist who has abused you to come back to you?

“The occasional text message doesn’t hurt and something, anything is better than nothing because I miss him.”

You miss being left on the shelf, you miss being made to feel second best, you miss never knowing if you will be contacted or not, you miss the agony of wondering if he is with his wife, you miss feeling upset because the promised text never arrived, you miss getting angry because he insulted you again, you miss the frustration as he failed to text you yet you knew he was at home watching the game because his Facebook post said as such?

All of these are examples of emotional thinking. Emotional thinking is the Enemy Within. All it wants you to do is engage with the narcissist and feed your addiction, but as I explained in The Devil´s Pitchfork nothing good will ever come of interaction with us and one, two or three bad things WILL always happen.

The implementation of no contact is not easy but it is nowhere near as hard as you think it is or will be, your emotional thinking wants you shirking from it, it wants you leaving gaps, it wants you leaving the door ajar, the window wide open and the key in the lock.

Your emotional thinking has you giving the narcissist far more credit that he or she deserves. Your emotional thinking causes you to think that the narcissist operates through cunning calculation, ruthless rumination and scientific scheming. In the vast majority of cases this is not the case.

Yes, a Greater Narcissist will hound you into break down, destruction of a state of numb paralysis because the Greater and only the Greater has the malice and resources to do this. However, even this outcome will not always occur with the Greater. Why is that? It is because the Greater has so many options, so many schemes, devices, designs and becomes bored faster than any other narcissist that he or she will leave you be whilst these other options are pursued. Yes, you may well be winged or teetering on the brink of annihilation but more usually the Greater Narcissist will maul you in some way and then become focused on something else and then something else and you have the opportunity to make yourself scarce. Most importantly though with regard to the Greater Narcissist they are extremely rare and that means the vast majority of victims never meet one, let alone find themselves on the wrong side of one. Of course, your emotional thinking makes you think you have been ensnared by a Greater – how many times do we see on the blog people claim that they have been ensnared by a Greater and it is a honest mistake driven by inexperience, a lack of knowledge and the impact of emotional thinking – and it wants you thinking this so that you in effect give up and think there is no escape and thus you remain in the clutches of what is actually a Mid Range Narcissist instead.

The fact is nearly all narcissists are Lesser or Mid Range and it is those narcissists that you will be ensnared by. I do not dilute the horrific impact of ensnarement with those narcissists, not at all, but you must hold to the logic and not be swayed by the corrupting influences of emotional thinking.

The Lesser Narcissist is a wrecking ball. He is haphazard and lurches from one disaster to the next, whether this is falling out with a family member again, another new relationship or losing his job (if he had one to being with). If you make it hard for the Lesser to hoover you he has not option other than to leave you alone and look for someone else. He is like the burglar who will not attempt to rob the house with closed windows, locked doors, sensors and CCTV. He will move on to the next one with the open window. Lesser Narcissists are lazy, they want to achieve the Prime Aims and barely wish to lift a finger to do so.

The Mid Range Narcissist is not lazy but he or she wants the path of least resistance. Every narcissist wants to conserve energy and gain the maximum return for the minimum input. Mid Range Narcissists are cowards and they pick on those targets which are vulnerable and they appear less dangerous owing to the facade, the Pity Plays, The “I Can Change” Fallacy and the Trouble Nice Guy. This panders to your empathic traits which as ever are corrupted by your emotional thinking so that you end up making it easy for the Mid Range Narcissist to hoover you. You worry about him so you allow the emails to come through, you think you can fix her so you keep open a text communication or you decide that you want to be civil and remain friends. You are being conned by your emotional thinking and breaching no contact.

Only the Greater will embark on a campaign against you which is virtually impossible to resist but the chances of that happening to you are extremely low because

  1. Greaters are extremely rare , and
  2. Greaters play with you like a cat with a mouse and will then have other matters to address owing to the fullness of their lives and the extensive fuel matrices.

The Lesser and Mid-Range Narcissists are able to hoover because victims let them. The victims do not put in place effective no contact regimes. I have seen this time and time again and the poll above bears this out. The poll does not bear witness to the puppeteering master villain who has plotted long and hard to scale the mighty defences of the victim to effect a hoover, no, he picked up his phone and sent a text message.

Easy to do.

Just as easy to stop.

I guarantee that if you tell me how you have been hoovered, I will tell you how it could have been stopped and how it could have been stopped without too much effort. We need fuel. We absolutely need fuel and if we cannot get it from you, we HAVE to go and get it elsewhere, but because your emotional thinking making you make mistakes in your attempts at no contact, you are conned into never putting it in place in the first place and/or not maintaining it properly and you end up being hoovered.

You can stop the hoovers.

Two factors want to break your no contact.

Us, the narcissists.

You, through emotional thinking.

And more than you realise it is actually you that brings about the breaking of your no contact, but what that also means is that you can stop it.

I have the tools and you have to wield them and then and only then will you stop the breaking of your no contact and achieve freedom. You can do it.

The Way To GoSo (Get Out and Stay Out)

Zero Impact

Divorcing The Narcissist – What To Expect

How To Co-Parent With A Narcissist

How To Handle The Narcissist At Work

 

 

 

 

OBSESSED 

I want you to be happy. I am so in love with you. You are everything that I have ever wanted, you are like a dream come true, my soul mate, my other half, you complete me. You have no idea just what you do to me. I just want to love you like nobody else ever has. Yes, I am obsessed with you. I want to merge with you and become one. I am not just obsessed with you but with everything about you and most of all your happiness.

I just want to ensure that someone as brilliant as you, someone as wonderful as you, someone as marvellous as you is made to feel special. You deserve that. I know. I know something, or rather somebody has hurt you before. I know you do not want to talk about it. That is absolutely fine.

You do not have to talk about it with me. You see, I can tell. I have a sixth sense if you will for knowing about these things. It is just the way I am and let me tell you that you should feel no shame for that. You should not be upset that you have been hurt because I am going to put an end to the hurt. I am always going to look after you, help you, hold you and comfort you.

No matter what the world throws at us, throws at you, I will be by your side. I want to keep all the malice and bad things in this world away from someone as special and as perfect as you. I regard that as my calling. I was sent to look after you. It is true. It was not just chance that brought you and me together, not at all. I was sent to make you happy. It has been decided that what happened in the past will stay in the past and instead I have come to bring you happiness, great glorious golden happiness. I will not rest in my desire to see you happy at all times.

When you are happy, I am happy. My happiness is conditional on yours, that is just the way I am. No matter what happens, I will not give up on you. I will ensure that everything is great again. I give you my word. I am totally committed to achieving your happiness. I will do anything in the world to see you smile, to see your eyes light up and to know that you feel wonderful. You are an amazing person and you, more than anyone else in the world, deserves happiness.

I know how to provide it you and if that means that you think that I am obsessed with achieving it then so be it, but it is a noble aim. It is a good and laudable endeavour to ensure your happiness. I will aim each and every day, without hesitation, without reluctance and without restraint to deliver this for you. I want to do this for you, I want to do this for us.

You are the most important person in the world to me. You have made me feel so special being with me and I always want that feeling to continue, now and forever. I want to give that to you in return for all the scintillating things you give to me. I am truly blessed to have coupled with you and no matter how difficult things might become, no matter how hard others may make it I will not shirk from achieving your complete and utter happiness. I was born to do this. I am utterly beholden to you and your happiness. This is my obsession. You are my obsession. I am obsessed with you.

 

A period of time passes.

 

You want me to be happy. You are so in love with me. I am everything that you have ever wanted, I am like a dream come true, your soul mate, your other half, I complete you. I have every idea just what I do to you. You just want to love me like nobody else ever has. Yes, you are obsessed with me. You want to merge with me and become one.

You are not just obsessed with me but with everything about me and most of all my happiness. You just want to ensure that someone as brilliant as me, someone as wonderful as me, someone as marvellous as me, is made to feel special. I deserve that. You know. You know something, or rather somebody has hurt me before. You know I do not want to talk about it.

That is absolutely fine. I will not have to talk about it with you. You can tell. You have a sixth sense if you will for knowing about these things. It is just the way you are and you tell me that I should feel no shame for that. I should not be upset that I have been hurt because you are going to put an end to the hurt. You will always look after me, help me, hold me and comfort me. No matter what the world throws at us, throws at me, you will be by my side.

You want to keep all the malice and bad things in this world away from someone as special and as perfect as me. You regard that as your calling. You were sent to look after me. It is true. It was not just chance that brought you and me together, not at all. You were sent to make me happy. It has been decided that what happened in the past will stay in the past and instead you have come to bring me happiness, great glorious golden happiness. You will not rest in your desire to see me happy at all times. When I am happy, you are happy.

Your happiness is conditional on mine, that is just the way you are. No matter what happens, you will not give up on me. You will ensure that everything is great again. You give me your word. You are  totally committed to achieving my happiness. You will do anything in the world to see me smile, to see my eyes light up and to know that I feel wonderful. I am an amazing person and I, more than anyone else in the world, deserves happiness.

You know how to provide it me and if that means that I think that you are obsessed with achieving it then so be it, but it is a noble aim. It is a good and laudable endeavour to ensure my happiness. You will aim each and every day, without hesitation, without reluctance and without restraint to deliver this for me. You want to do this for me, you want to do this for us. I am the most important person in the world to you. I have made you feel so special being with you and you always want that feeling to continue, now and forever.

You want to give that to me in return for all the scintillating things I give to me. You are truly blessed to have coupled with me and no matter how difficult things might become, no matter how hard others may make it you will not shirk from achieving my complete and utter happiness. You were born to do this. You are utterly beholden to me and my happiness. This is your obsession. I am your obsession. You are obsessed with me.

Think I am the only one who engages in mirroring?

Think again.

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