Dear Self,
I haven’t had a chance to fully meet you yet but, surely I know you are in here somewhere.
You were lost for so long and as hard as it can be to believe it, you thought you were centered, perfectly engaged in your own life and although you had some questions about yourself they were never close to what they are now. Well, at least you continue to be strong as you always chose to be but, after this remarkable experience you’ve changed so much. You are right, it was what you could call the love of your life. The person that took the best out of you. But what is the best of you?
That question remains in the back of your head as it could never be answered. And in reality it can’t. Not right now – Not until you don’t face your reality. The truth of the matter is that your ego never let your soul knows that they could friendy co exist. You didn’t know but, you were deprived from happiness because your happiness was maskared by your unreal reality.
You were deprived of true love because your sense of love was considerably broken. You were deprived from health as health was before only seen as a condition of the body and you seemed perfectly fine. You were deprived from friends as their boundaries were always respected regardless of yours.
Now you know it is a long way and a journey you are enjoying but, until you get there be ready for a roller coaster of emotions. Memories, grief, anger, contempt, pride, rage, sadness, happiness, joy, surprise and many others that might have the name but, were never fully- trully experienced before. I know you are taking day by day, step by step and I comand you since I am very proud of you!
It hasn’t been easy we know but, nobody said it would however, nobody even said that what was called love and seen as evil at a certain point; was brought by the angels to finally and fully give you the life you always deserved. I am looking forward to meet you soon when we finally will be able to look at each other and say: “we are enough”.
Truly,
GB