An APB has been issued for the apprehension of one Rudolph the Red Nosed Narcissist.
On December 25th, a jury in the Ultra Court of Tudor found Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer to be a narcissist. Whilst awaiting sentencing, the convict was able to evade his guards. CCTV footage demonstrates that guards were conned by the convict hiding his signature glowing nose with the Angel from the Christmas Tree causing guards to believe he was Donner or Blitzen.
Prior to entering the dock for sentencing, the Angel was cast to one side, leaving her to be sentenced (and unable to fly she was left on the floor) as the convict Rudolph galloped for a side door and disappeared into the world at large.
Rest assured that the Tudor Marshalls are tracking down this vile fugitive from justice who has shown his true narcissist character by evading accountability, showing no emotional empathy for his many victims and exhibiting grandiosity and a sense of entitlement in clinging to liberty. He will be brought to justice and dealt with most severely.
Be aware, be vigilant and be alert! Exercise caution around
- Rear brake lights on motor vehicles
- Traffic lights
- Brothels
- Mobile discos
- The top of emergency vehicles
- Certain neon signs
as the suspect will seek to disguise himself in such places in order to blend in his beacon of a nose.
Anybody assisting or harbouring this fugitive from justice can expect to be dealt with severely.
Further updates will be provided as the Red Nosed Narcissist is brought to justice.