Wanted ! Extinguished or Shining


An APB has been issued for the apprehension of one Rudolph the Red Nosed Narcissist.

On December 25th, a jury in the Ultra Court of Tudor found Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer to be a narcissist. Whilst awaiting sentencing, the convict was able to evade his guards. CCTV footage demonstrates that guards were conned by the convict hiding his signature glowing nose with the Angel from the Christmas Tree causing guards to believe he was Donner or Blitzen.

Prior to entering the dock for sentencing, the Angel was cast to one side, leaving her to be sentenced (and unable to fly she was left on the floor) as the convict Rudolph galloped for a side door and disappeared into the world at large.

Rest assured that the Tudor Marshalls are tracking down this vile fugitive from justice who has shown his true narcissist character by evading accountability, showing no emotional empathy for his many victims and exhibiting grandiosity and a sense of entitlement in clinging to liberty. He will be brought to justice and dealt with most severely.

Be aware, be vigilant and be alert! Exercise caution around

  • Rear brake lights on motor vehicles
  • Traffic lights
  • Brothels
  • Mobile discos
  • The top of emergency vehicles 
  • Certain neon signs

as the suspect will seek to disguise himself in such places in order to blend in his beacon of a nose.

Anybody assisting or harbouring this fugitive from justice can expect to be dealt with severely. 

Further updates will be provided as the Red Nosed Narcissist is brought to justice.

586 thoughts on “Wanted ! Extinguished or Shining

  1. AnneB says:

    True Bubbles, the majority ruled, but not end of story! Rudy is still at large. That’s good. It would be best for him to remain escaped but I’m a little doubtful that his escape is the end of this story. Yet, I hope it is!

  2. Bubbles🍾 says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    I trust your good self and the lovely Shieldmaiden had a most magical Christmas
    Mr Tudor, thank you so very much for your blog, your advice and the service you provide
    My sincerest best wishes to you and the lovely Shieldmaiden in health happiness n prosperity for the new year
    Here’s cheers to 2020 🍾🥂
    Luv Bubbles xx 😘

    (Ps…tonight is New Year’s Eve where I am, so it’s befitting to comment on “this” post seeing as it’s about Rudolph and he/she worked Christmas Eve …😂)

  3. narccissuss says:

    The next time you step on my land I will tear one of those legs of yours off and I will eat it in front of you, because you don’t know who you’re dealing with haha.

    1. narccissuss says:

      Your mother made your childhood hell, I’m going to go for your old age you ass-face!

      1. Desirée says:

        Your ability to entertain was short-lived indeed. I suppose below the surface, there is just more surface.

        1. Notme! says:

          Class! May I steal that?

          1. Desirée says:

            Go ahead Notme, it is applicable to plenty of people after all. Incidentally, most of them are of the low on empathy variety.

      2. Alexissmith2016 says:

        Narccissuss, you seem like a person who is very open and knowledgable about being an N. I’d like to ask you a question if I may?

        How does it make you feel when people aren’t scared or tormented by you, they neither love nor hate you and in fact find your behaviour and statements for want of a better word, comical?

        I’m not attempting to would or challenge I’m just interested as to what you think and to understand your level of awareness of how others perceive you.

        Thank you in advance.


        1. narccissuss says:

          You see, it is NOT a real threat, I’m not actually threatening him at all in my mind, I’m just PROVOKING him, and what I want from this provocation? FUEL, I don’t care if it is Negative or Positive. If the other person reacts upset or scared then it provides me with Negative Fuel. If the other person laughs, it does not wound at all because I’m not serious at all either, indeed if he or she laughs it provides me with Positive Fuel. But Mr. Tudor knows my tricks very well, I have done it to him a million times haha and that is why he just reaponded with: “Yawn” which provided me with a little bit of Challenge Fuel. That is not what I want from him, and he knows it.

          The content of my words does not matter to me at all because I have no Façade, I only focus on gathering Fuel from everyone around me, and that is why everyone around me thinks I’m crazy or retarded haha (like all of you are doing right now) because I really don’t care as long as I gather my Fuel. You had to see my Word Salads.

          People think they got me, but I got them XD.

        2. Desirée says:

          Its grandiosity, not awareness. You can read all about it in the book “The Platinum Collection Volume One” and the answers to your questions are in the Chapter “The Narcissist Who Would Be King” on Page 3419.

          1. Lorelei says:

            Just nailed it Desiree! Grandiosity—not self awareness. I was having trouble putting my finger on this nonsense. That simple word did it.

          2. Lorelei says:

            This is harsh but so be it—anyone that is this stupid cums in five seconds or before it even gets in. He probably targets his cousins or sister—or the family dog as previously mentioned. He plays video games all day when not jacking off to various weird porn sites. His New Years will be spent trying to assimilate a collection of Old Spice deodorant that isn’t broken and squeezing the last drop out of a tube of Colgate to go lay his 12-year-old cousin. None of this is appealing or attractive and Violetta did a great job on her grammatical analysis.

          3. Violetta says:

            I’ve seen documentaries on both lions and hyenas. Lions do drive hyenas away from their own kills. For generations, people would see hyenas returning after the lions left and peg them as scavengers.

            When lions do their own kills, that big, macho lion with the shaggy mane gives a giant roar….and scares the prey into an ambush of females, who do the actual killing.

            A pair of males took over a pride from an aging male. One of the first things they did was kill all the cubs, so the females would stop lactating, go into estrus, and breed their cubs. Lions don’t have particularly expressive faces, but one female winced and froze when she saw this.

            (Female tigers have found a rather skanky away around this possiblity.)

          4. FYC says:

            Violetta, this is incorrect information. It is the female lions do the hunting for the pride. Not the males. Lions are not scavengers unless there is a predisposing condition to create desperation.

          5. Violetta says:

            Complain to PBS. Obviously, the Lion and Hyena Union is coddling the membership again, no matter how openly they violate protocol.

        3. Desirée says:

          *Position 3419

          1. narccissuss says:

            Hilarious, if Tudor posts my reply to her which is just above your head, a great building of Awareness would fall down on your head, and probably you would learn something new today. Maybe you would learn to shut up your mouth a little bit before talking bulshits. But everytime I talk about Awareness, he doesn’t post a fuck because he knows he made a big mistake calling me Mid-Range here, and my constant mute about Awareness is my best answer XD. It is my best confirmation, and I will stay with it.

            Tudor, your first priority should be the learning of your readers NOT make me look like an unaware Mid-Range because that is a wrong teaching.

          2. HG Tudor says:


          3. K says:

            So much for blending in.

          4. Desirée says:

            we’re aware there’s lots going over your head.

          5. narccissuss says:

            Hey!, you posted this one!, thanks!, but you haven’t posted any about awareness yet. Tudor, let’s finish this debate at once, a lot of your readers have asked you this in recent days and I am very curious to know your answer too. Where YOU place me in YOUR Spectrum?.

            Let’s roll that Narc Detector once and for all haha.

          6. Violetta says:

            HG: Please let me know if you want to review any hyena posts for grammar and style.
            I shall leave analysis of their content to those who’ve been reading your work longer.

            Btw, wishing everyone a Happy New Year[‘s Eve], depending where you are in longitude.

          7. HG Tudor says:

            Be my guest

          8. narccissuss says:

            Honey, I don’t even need to reply to any of you. Just ask Tudor to let you see my reply to Alexis, yes, that one which is just right above your head, and it will fall down crushing every “grandiosity” head XD.

          9. Desirée says:

            That’s a kind and useful offer Violetta, Happy New Years to you, as well. Athough when I look at all the nonsense that narcoticum is sprouting, I am mostly just annoyed that in my longtitude, it’s too early still to start the gin and tonic.

          10. NarcAngel says:

            They talk a lot of smack for someone who likely has to use their inhaler twice just to key their insane ramblings.

          11. Dorion says:

            Narccissuss, it’s funny that you fight so adamantly for being heard and seen. All you seem to achieve is more ridicule, whether it is coming from the nature of the posts that do appear or the filtering. HG will always do whatever he wants with his blog, weird that someone who claims to be so aware does not seem to understand this or would continue fighting so blindly. More than anything, it seems that you like/want to be controlled.

            Why not create a site for yourself that you can use any way you want and publish your own thoughts about awareness where anyone can see it? It is a hot topic indeed and could draw a lot of interest and possibly competition with others “your level”. Of course getting attention that way takes talent and effort. I am quite a novice to HG’s work but I think there is more to being a Greater than knowing one is fucked up. There is ability for example, not meaning ability to keep banging on a door.

          12. Violetta says:

            Thank you, HG. I apologize for any errors in SGML. I generally use mark-up comments in Word, but thought uploading an entire document might not be practical here:

            Your mother made your childhood hell, I’m going to go for your old age you ass-face!
            Comma splice. Use semi-colon if both sides of it are main clauses—could stand alone as sentences with period in-between.
            Maybe you would learn to shut up your mouth a little bit before talking bulshits.
            Sp. Bullshit
            But everytime I talk about Awareness, he doesn’t post a fuck because he knows he
            Two words: every time
            Word form adj. to noun: post a fuckING THING

            made a big mistake calling me Mid-Range here, and my constant mute about Awareness is my best answer XD.
            Muteness/mutism, depending on condition
            Hey!, you posted this one!, thanks!, but you haven’t posted any about awareness yet.
            Don’t double-punct.
            Tudor, let’s finish this debate at once, a lot of your readers have asked you this in recent days and I am very curious to know your answer too. Where YOU place me in YOUR Spectrum?.
            double-punct. and word missing: Where do YOU place me in YOUR Spectrum?

            Let’s roll that Narc Detector once and for all haha.
            Comma after “all,” to set off interjection.

            Listen to me Mr. Tudor. Listen close.
            Comma after “me” – Adverb, not adj: Listen closeLY.
            I have a phrase:
            Violence for the Lesser, Passive-Aggressiveness for the Mid-Range, Grand Design for the Greater, and Hell for the Self-proclaimed “Ultra”.
            In American punct, if no cite parenth immediately following close quote, commas and periods go BEFORE close quote mark
            Example: The commercials claim the product can “hover,” “float,” and “slide.”
            Punct placement is different in UK. Just be consistent.

            And right now there is no Lesser, Mid-Range, or Greater to destroy around me. I’m coming for you, Mr. Tudor.
            comma to separate an adverbial phrase: And right now, there is no Lesser
            Word usage: that’s a lot more than one phrase. Motto? Slogan? Philosophy?

            Mr. Tudor, I can’t cope with this Lack of Freedom of Expression and Discrimination Against Me here,
            Why cap “against Me”?
            Comma splice – semi-colon after “here”
            you post everyone’s comments except mine, you and your readers attack me and then you don’t even let me defend myself because you are not interesed
            use spellcheck before submitting

            in any debate or anything, you’re only interested in trying to humiliate the Narcissists
            comma splice
            that appear on your blog from time to time.unfairly since you don’t even let us express
            People are not “that”
            people are “who” – things are “that” or “which,” depending on sentence construction
            Why period? If new sentence, spacing after period and cap “unfairly” (frag, but I’ll allow for emphasis). Comma to separate dependent clause would work better.

            ourselves. Sorry but I don’t play anything with cheaters like you. I would say that this Blog insults my Sense of Entitlement but I am not even asking anything special from the rest.
            Comma after “Sorry” – adverbial phrase
            Comma after Entitlement – precedes dependent clause

            Mr, Tudor, I’m not crying at all. I’m just asking you equality for me. I have no problem
            Period, not comma after Mr., Mrs, etc. in US – no punct required in UK
            with people disagreeing with me, attacking me, or even trying to humiliate me at all, on the contrary
            Semi-colon after “all” – comma splice as is – comma after adverbial phrase: humiliate me at all; on the contrary,that is a lot of fun
            and a little bit of Negative Fuel and/or Challenge Fuel to me, but if you allow it then allow me to defend myself too. I’m not asking you anything special. I know
            comma to separate dependent clause: but if you allow it, then allow me to defend myself
            you have rules here and I can respect them. I can behave, but if I don’t in some way, then you are entitled to do anything with my comments, even block me or ban me, this is your Blog.
            Comma splice: even block me or ban me; this is your Blog.

            But my point is that I don’t think I have broken any rules yet, although nobody knows your rules only you do,
            unless of course my presence in this place breaks some of your rules. That is why, the question is very simple:
            Why comma? What are you separating?
            comma where not needed and no commas where needed

            Can I comment here on your Blog like anyone else without any disadvantage or especial rule for me? Yes or No? It’s that easy Mr. Tudor.
            Comma after “easy”
            No need to make any drama of this.
            Drama would be reduced by a less whiny, defensive tone. In addition, if your thesis is that you are “not crying at all,” complaints that you are treated “unfairly” and being “humiliated” do not support your argument.
            We all make typos, including me, but as long as readers can tell what you mean, it’s not a major issue on an informal post.
            In your case, however, there is a negative effect on clarity. Proofreading would have caught most of these.

          13. K says:

            Thanks for the grammar lesson; I found it very helpful.

          14. Violetta says:

            In addition, you have demanded that HG tell you “Where YOU place me in YOUR Spectrum?.” [sic]
            To my knowledge, you have not paid him for a consult, nor are you (again to my knowledge), on the Angel Assistance wait-list.

            On the bright side, I doubt you have even made his radar.

          15. narccissuss says:

            Hahaha Mr. Tudor, I already read this article: “The Narcissist’s Façade At Work” and I won’t play the powerless and useless girl role here. No way. I’m smarter than that.

            It is not about you showing anything since they just don’t want to see anything anyway. You are God here and all of them have blind faith in you.

            Well, like I said, I will take your mutes and silences as the perfect and ultimate answer to your pathetic attempt to devalue me.

          16. HG Tudor says:

            You have to matter to be devalued

          17. NarcAngel says:


            Wrong again. We do want to see things, and we see and learn much here. We just have no interest in you. You are a bore. Next.

          18. Mercy says:

            narccissuss, You said to HG “You are God here” Very good! You are learning. Now run along. Grab some tissue on your way out. You’re making a mess all over His Greatness’s floor.

          19. Desirée says:

            Damn Violetta, narcismania might need some Aloe for that burn. You kind of remind me of my old english teacher now. Can I hire you by any chance? I need someone to hold me to THAT type of standard again, I would hate to get lazy.

          20. Mercy says:

            Desiree, I was wondering if she came in an app version.
            Violetta, I will apologize in advance for all of my grammar errors. There’s really no help for me.

          21. Dorion says:

            Me too, Violetta! Where do I sign up for a class? English is not my first language and I feel endlessly inferior outside of technical writing because I just cannot stand up to my own standards, no matter how many years and how much theoretical desire I have for improvement. I almost feel jealous of narccissuss for not caring.

          22. Notme! says:

            Thank you for letting this stuff through HG. I imagine it is tedious for you, but it is instructive for those of us who have a more limited experience of different schools/cadres. Whilst I do not think you are God (sorry), I shall be be ever grateful for your work.

            I had a message today from a lady that I referred to your books and blog, which said ‘you’ve changed my life’. It wasn’t me who changed it HG. Happy New Year x

          23. narccissuss says:

            No, I think you mean: “You are not a Puppet of mine” hahaha because no one really matters to you Mr. Tudor, and you have make it clear a million of times. The way you dehumanize everyone. So I feel amazing about that statement of yours.

            Mr. Tudor, you say you are a game player and you must win every game you play. Don’t you?. But if you win them all by cheating in some way then you really are a serial losser because every adversary of yours has brought the moral victory home. Well, I don’t think you know the meaning of that and if you do then you don’t mind at all like every Golden Girl out there who takes the toy home when she is losing XD.

            Mr. Tudor if you don’t want more people to call this Blog “a religious cult” anymore XD then I think you and your empathic readers should start having tolerance for dissent. Just one advice. Well, it is cause and effect really XD.

            There is no such thing as: “The Five Rules” in this place. That is the excuse you invented to have total contral here, as always, because in your little imaginary world you are nothing but a little Dictator who can’t even survive without having that total control. You are a pathetic human being Mr. Tudor, and I just tell you the truth that the “people” around you do not dare to tell you.

          24. Violetta says:

            Thank you all for your kind responses. You do not need to worry about your posts: I haven’t even guessed which ones have English as a second or third language unless you tell me.

            What produces hyena-posts is not a lack of grammatical knowledge but a vicious cycle between muddled language and muddled thinking. I refer you to Orwell’s “Politics and the English Language” for the way the one leads to the other in an ever-worsening pattern of using language to obscure rather than to communicate, and to repress thought rather than inspire it.

          25. FYC says:

            Hello Violetta, I hope you have a fantastic new year. I enjoy your posts and very nearly did not say anything regarding Hyenas, but since I support wildlife, I though I would clear up some misconceptions regarding real hyena. The hyena is an apex predator (top of the food chain with the exception of humans). Hyena are one of the few species who can kill a big cat (rare unless vulnerable, and often the lion prevails). Most hyena are carnivores, but one type of hyena eats only termites and other insects. The hyena have gotten bad rap because of how they are depicted (most often using the spotted hyena that makes a laughing sound (due to anxiety) during conflict and also due to their habit if gaining up on prey (they hunt and live in packs.

            So in your analogy, may I suggest the African bullfrog as a substitute? It is aggressive and behaves as if it were the king of the Savana. They are small yet puff themselves up to nearly twice their size to appear more attractive and impressive to others. African bull frogs are voracious omnivores who will even cannibalize their own tadpoles when in need of fuel. They vocalize with loud croaking and bleating sounds, but are only a threat to defenseless small creatures. Even though they have tiny sharp teeth they are easily squashed or bitten by a lion.

            The it that appears here is certainly no apex predator. It puffs itself up, but is believed by no one. It bleats nonsense and pity plays and bares it’s tiny sharp teeth, but no one gives it much notice because the only threat it poses here is boredom.

          26. Violetta says:

            You make valid points. It’s certainly true that lions have an undeserved reputation for nobility, when (as noted above), they hijack hyena kills.

            Blobfish? When they are at their proper level at the bottom of the ocean, they look more or less like any fish. Bring them to the surface (with insufficient water pressure to keep them from swelling up), and they look kinda gross.

          27. FYC says:

            Violetta, I would say lions deserve their noble distinction. They are king of their food chain (only have to fear mankind–and they are now endangered due to human mismanagement) and are very loving, protective and noble to their pride. You have the roles backwards; hyena hijack lion kill not the other way around. Lions prefer the chase and calculate with precision.

            Blobfish? Sounds about right!

          28. FYC says:

            Violetta, To be clear, my original comment was referring to self defense of any lion threatened by hyenas. Even if a lion kills a hyena, they will not eat it–it is only in defense (self or other or especially cubs) lions kill hyena. Sorry to go off topic.

      3. Mercy says:

        I this an attempt at a “ur momma” joke?

        1. Violetta says:

          He’s trying to emulate HG’s diabolical skill in getting trusting victims to reveal traumatic details about dysfunctional families or resented hairstyles so he can use them against the victim later.

          Sadly, his own skill is hardly diabolical, and I am sure HG takes into account the possibility that someone may decide to throw some of his disclosures in his face before he reveals anything.

          Either that, or the interloper’s mama is so stupid, she got run over by a parked bus.

          1. Mercy says:

            Maybe his momma is so fat, he took a picture of her last Christmas and it’s still printing.

            Gurl what did you start?

          2. Violetta says:

            His mama so desperate, she go bangin’ on the Jehovah’s Witnesses’ door
            “Lemme in, lemme in! I’ll read The Watchtower wit’ you!”

            (Notice: correct grammar not required when representing dialogue in the vernacular.)

          3. Mercy says:

            His momma is so dumb, she got caught staring at an orange juice carton because it said “concentrate”

          4. Violetta says:

            His mama so dumb, they found her dead in the shower, with any empty shampoo bottle reading, “lather, rinse, repeat.”

          5. Mercy says:

            His mama so stupid, when they were handin out narc babies, she asked for a mid.

            (Why did I use to hate yo mama jokes? This is great!)

          6. K says:

            Hahahahaha…that was great! Thanks for the laugh!

          7. Violetta says:

            His mama so desperate, she pays her customers.

            With food stamps.

          8. Mercy says:

            Violetta, I think he’s gone. Our work is done.

          9. Violetta says:


            That was fun. Thank you for sharing this cultural experience.

            Now I’m totally homesick for Noo Yawk (sniffle).

          10. Mercy says:

            Violetta, haha I’m glad to share this moment with you. “We’ll always have yo mama”

          11. Violetta says:

            You know, that little intrusion did me some good. After I did some proofreading of The Word Salad, I suddenly knew what to say if an interviewer asks me why I want to leave my last employer. Instead of ranting about all the destructive changes the new administration has made, I just say, “They’re not letting me do what I do best.” Then I tell them what I do best, with a BRIEF reference to how overly-complex software and canned lesson plans cut into my time to do it.

          12. Mercy says:

            Violetta, when is your interview? I remember you said it was this month.

          13. Violetta says:

            I’d rather not give the date. I’ll post about it when it’s over, unless I’m too embarrassed.

            I’m going to look at their course offerings and think about how I would teach each one.

          14. NarcAngel says:

            I wish you success with your interview.

          15. Mercy says:

            Well good luck to you. Please try not to think too much about it. Remember ET is our enemy. When you start to doubt yourself, channel your inner HG. Play the role of a greater N. Impress them not only with your abilities, but also your confidence. I know you’ll do well!

        2. Mercy says:

          His mama so dumb, I saw her in a tree talking about how she the branch manager.

          1. Violetta says:

            I missed this one. I’m stealing it.

            Either HG wasn’t letting Blobfish’s response(s) through, or a couple of rounds of The Dozens (aka Rankin’ on yo Mama) were too much for him.

            If Blobby can’t handle a subway-platform-level rhetorical exchange with us, what made him think he could take on HG?

          2. Mercy says:

            Violetta, There have been some interesting narcs here before but even his dumb mama could see he’s no match for HG.

          3. Mercy says:

            Violetta, By the way my dad is a Jehovah’s witnesses. True story.

          4. Lorelei says:

            I still want to know why the pop tarts aren’t frosted throughout their entire bodies.

          5. Violetta says:

            Mercy: I don’t think the kids at my school knew any actual Jehovah’s Witnesses, but they’d use anything for a diss. There were two Unitarians in one class. One of them told me they had meetings with a lot of arts and crafts, rather than any kind of formal religious ritual.
            The guys used to tell jokes like, “Waddya get when you cross a Unitarian and a Jehovah’s Witness? Someone who bangs on your door at 7 in the morning for no goddam reason at all.”

          6. Mercy says:

            Lorelei, it’s a mystery to me as well. What’s worse is I’m disappointed everytime I open a package as if I didn’t already know it wouldn’t be fully frosted.

    2. Kim e says:

      Who left the barn door open? It escaped again

      1. Notme! says:

        What’s that phrase about showing up to a battle of wits unarmed?
        I’m voting for LMR – victim although I don’t know much about UL

      2. Lorelei says:

        Kim—I like your reference to “It.” I think it’s a prepubescent boy who molests the family schnauzer.

        1. Violetta says:

          Poor schnauzer.

          1. Renarde says:

            Poor world!

      3. Violetta says:

        Kim E:
        No, it wandered into the property. Hyenas have no use as domestic animals.

    3. narccissuss says:

      Listen to me Mr. Tudor. Listen close. I have a phrase:
      Violence for the Lesser, Passive-Aggressiveness for the Mid-Range, Grand Design for the Greater, and Hell for the Self-proclaimed “Ultra”. And right now there is no Lesser, Mid-Range, or Greater to destroy around me. I’m coming for you, Mr. Tudor.

      1. HG Tudor says:


        1. Notme! says:


          1. Notme! says:

            Your tolerance of and disinterest in this guff is inspiring HG. For so long I’ve considered my empathic traits as a blessing; stuff I’m lucky to have. These day’s my new aspiration is to be able to blank more. When I can say ‘I don’t have time for your personality disorder today’, I’ll graduate from this site.

        2. Renarde says:

          Goodness! I just almost spat out my peanuts!

          Are you not scared, HG? I will happily hold your coat and hand you the weapons?

          Now, I WOULD offer you the use of my special balcony but (peers closer at Narciss), I just think it’s going to be needed!

          Nice Xmas, HG?

          1. HG Tudor says:

            No, I am not scared. Hardly a surprise is it?!

          2. Renarde says:

            No. You will always attract those fuckwits!

            I used to be scared. Of what they can do. We hear all the time about females who ate battered to death. Of course I am frightened it might happen to me.

            Good luck, I say.

            Happy New Year, HG. And thank you.

          3. HG Tudor says:

            You are welcome.

          4. Renarde says:

            As are you. Always.

        3. Cyn says:

          Sorry to butt in HG…Who is that? Will you direct me to the beginning of where that entity showed up? I’ve been absent a bit looks like I missed something…

          1. Mercy says:

            Cyn, This is where it started. Apparently he goes by other names on other threads.

            NARCISSUS says:
            December 26, 2019 at 19:40

            I want you to picture yourself having a conversation like this with any other person in a public place, then me approaching your back cautiously and you don’t getting to hear me approaching your back, next, me getting close enough to smell your hair, and suddenly my strong and young hands grabbing your old and weak shoulders bruptly… I want you to picture the end of such successful approaching XD.

            HG Tudor says:
            December 27, 2019 at 09:07
            Hello again Darkest Cupido. Hiding behind a name change. How very Mid Range.If, as you state, you are in your 20s, I am indeed older than you, but I am not old.Yes I can picture your hands grabbing my shoulders. I now also hear your wrists break and your howl of agony.
            Run along now. You do not get to play with the big boys

          2. Violetta says:

            He tried to pass himself off as a Machiavellian elite, or something. HG is too intelligent to be Beauty and the Beast’s Gaston, but this guy was carrying on like LeFou: “We Machiavellian Elites gotta stick together,” so to speak.

      2. Notme! says:

        Which bit is the phrase? It’s so hard to tell with all the capital letters

        1. Cyn says:

          @Mercy, thank you. Wow, threats even. . . narccipissed. Happy New Year’s Eve everyone if you haven’t made it to 2020 yet. Happy 2020 everyone who has. @HG Thank you for making 2019 much saner than the previous 4 and the next one will be even better. More entertaining as well.

      3. Chihuahuamum says:

        Eek sounds ominous! 😄

      4. Hope says:

        What? You appear so crazy. Why make him so important to you? Seems like a waste of your time and energy. What is driving you? You just enjoy trolling?

      5. Desirée says:

        foetus narcoticus ridiculus
        Quite the emotional display, a pity it is this low on sense…or relevance.

    4. Witch says:

      Is he a lesser midranger elite? Because he’s giving off, shoot up a school vibes/ kill my parents while they are sleeping vibes (still lives with his parents vibes)
      Might have tortured a few rodents as a child
      Would want to get caught and end up on news
      Envious of HG, wants people to be scared of him, wants to be noticed.
      Cuts arms because Marilyn Manson told him to
      That’s the kind of energy I’m sensing

    5. Mercy says:


    6. K says:

      I don’t have a problem with you or your posts, however, you may want to reconsider your decision to make threats. There are other narcissists who post here/have posted, who don’t make threats, blend right in and interact with others on the blog.

  4. WokeAF says:

    %*#^!! Gotta comment bc I gotta resub to notifications for some reason

  5. ANM says:

    Your honor,
    There has been a misunderstanding, Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer is suffering from PTSD because all of the other reindeers used to laugh and call him names, they never let poor Rudolph join in the reindeer games. When the Marshals find him, please consider house arrest instead of jail time.

  6. WokeAF says:

    Great pic

  7. Emextraordinaire says:

    Wow. I have tried to post several times.. WordPress and I are having a moment. I tried to search your Merry Christmas to no avail. I have lots of reading to do to keep up…
    Merry Christmas HG & Happy 2020! The stars are aligned and it looks to be a great year for many of us.
    Thank you for just being you. I found this… total fluke. Just what I needed. After 18 mos of WTF. You and your long term posters, friends, kick ass commenters have been a blessing.
    Thank you to all! Much love & let’s kick this new year narc free!

  8. WiserNow says:

    Dear HG,
    This was a brilliant exercise and it was a lot of fun to join in. Thank you for adding it to the blog. You have an inventive and unique way of informing and teaching us about this subject and making it relevant at Christmas too. Bravo HG!

    1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

      Dear WiserNow,
      I totally agree with you
      Mr Tudor has done amazingly……as always !
      We’ve had a few issues going on and it’s taken my mind off them
      So it’s a big hearfelt thank you from me !
      Luv Bubbles xx 😘

      1. WiserNow says:

        Dear Bubbles,
        I’m sorry to hear you’ve been having issues, especially at this time of year. Christmas tends to bring out heightened emotions compared to other times of the year, so I hope things will settle down for you soon.

        Hang in there and stick to your guns. I think your actions to protect your youngest will send the right message to her, and in the meantime, she’ll hopefully see the contrast between the peace and protection you give her and the tensions that occur otherwise.

        All the best to you Bubbles, and have a Happy New Year xx 😘

        1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

          Dearest WiserNow,
          I don’t know what it is this time of year ! ( Well yes I do )
          It’s been all over the place
          Mum’s been difficult, our dear old friend in the nursing home, our youngest’s partner out of the blue
          And just now, tonight, our greater friend giving me a hard time, saying he’s not normal
          “Hmmm” …as the Witcher would say …haha
          Thankyou pet
          Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          1. Violetta says:

            Bubbles, I think you are in Oz somewhere. If you are anywhere near the wine region, please get the hell out. I don’t know much about the geography there, but I read that koalas have been reduced to a third of what they were on the entire continent, and that’s brought home the scope of the fires in a way that place names wouldn’t.

          2. AnneB says:

            Violetta, yes. The situation is tragic. Their habitat , of course, already reduced due to human impact, historical and present land use etc. (as with most other fauna/flora world wide). Koalas need a lot of special care right now. There are people who are doing so to the best that they can. I admire and am grateful for those people.

          3. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear Violetta,
            Thank you for your kind sentiments lovely one
            We are safe where we are
            The poor koalas, kangaroos, horses, sheep, possums you name it
            Around 3,000 bats fell to their deaths from the scorching heat (along with birds)
            The support has been phenomenal to the wineries, those who’ve lost their homes and the animals
            We are on catastrophic high alert for more !
            Fingers crossed
            Thank you for your concern precious
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          4. NarcAngel says:

            It’s a horror to read about what’s happening there. I’m glad you’re safe. Thinking of you.

          5. K says:

            Dearest Bubbles,
            Those poor animals. The wall of fire was on
            the evening news and it looks very bad. Keep safe.
            Luv K xoxox

          6. WiserNow says:

            You’re welcome Bubbles. I think Christmas brings all of these ‘fraught’ emotions up to the surface even more than usual. Hopefully, they’ll clear and things will progress and become a bit more peaceful for you overall. But, yes, it can be stressful.

            Families! What can you do? You can’t live with them and you wouldn’t be here without them! hahaha

            Wishing you happier and more peaceful times ahead, Dear Bubbles xx😘

          7. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear Violetta, NarcAngel and WiserNow,
            Thank you beautiful ones for your well wishes
            Sadly another firefighter has died and two seriously burnt
            We have to drive thru a high risk region of the hills to get to mum’s …..so far good ….. but anything is possible at this stage !
            I think the ” heat ” has been getting to us all !
            A big Heartfelt thank you ladies ❤️❤️❤️
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          8. Violetta says:

            Bubbles: please keep updating us.

        2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

          Dearest K,
          Thank you so much lovely one …..we’re safe
          In all my years, I’ve never seen our country this bad !
          It’s just devastating ! I think everyone is in shock!
          We all know someone who’s been affected !
          Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          1. AnneB says:

            Bubbles, so glad to hear you are all good! It is shocking, I am in Aus but we are safe from the fires where I live. I do have close friends not far outside the current evac area, it is all well organised for alerts, they are safe. The next three days of 40 plus along with wind…It’s frightening…but I am grateful there is this 2 day window of opportunity to get people out of the biggest front’s current path. The poor animals though.

            I read that a bunch of US “mega” fire fighting experts arrived this morn to help out. Gotta love the big guys when they come to lend a hand!

            To try and pretzel this into relevant theme for Narcsite, hopefully H.G. will allow a few remarks re ScoMo. With any luck, ScoMo’s own supporters will lose confidence in him over his (non) handling of this terrible situation and he will go in the aftermath. For me, this puts him in the lower ranges of mid-range. He doesn’t even realise what he is doing to his own facade, endangering his own fuel sources and his control. I won’t post links here but his public responses include such things as reminding people that there is still the cricket (!), resulting in him receiving tweets and public figures posting survivors’ responses – stuff like (paraphrase) “P.M. ScoMo, I just rowed 6 hours by boat/travelled a track through back country by car, with my 5 year old daughter, along the New South Wales Coast to escape the fire that destroyed my home/animals/land. I am now at X evacuation centre. The current test match offers no comfort at all. Hope you’re good at other stuff cos you’re a useless PM”.

            He’s also been told to eff off directly by affected residents owing to his Hawaii holiday. He is unable to hide his insincerity.

            If any one ever made their own bed….

          2. Violetta says:

            I just saw last night that lightning and dry brush had started several new fires, so without knowing anything about Aussie politics, I’d say your PM lacks either cognitive empathy or the ability to fake it.
            How did someone so low-functioning get so far?
            We could say the same of many of our US politicians, but at least they have a vague idea you’re supposed to fake something, even if they don’t do it very well.


          3. AnneB says:

            Violetta, Cricket the sport – it is a ball game!

            ScoMo is a swarmy Bastard. He hasn’t been really been challenged on the empathy front up until this point.

          4. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear AnneB,
            I’m so relieved you are safe precious
            You’ve nailed it regarding ScoMo, he appears very “insensitive” and lacking “initiative” in our crisis
            Spending the day at home with the cricketers because it’s “tradition” is a mid ranger feeling he’s doing good and is being seen to do good
            He doesn’t have the backbone of a greater to take charge
            The Fire Commissioner has achieved more and is overshining ScoMo for his assertion and decisiveness, showing great leadership and empathy toward his firefighters ….pinning the bravery award on little Harvey …forever Kodak moment !
            All I keep seeing is that stupid dumb blank look on ScoMos face that is so typical of a narc
            He should “apologising” and “empathising” big time to win back his country’s support
            Mid rangers are cowards !
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          5. AnneB says:

            On the money there Bubbles. People are looking to the fire chief for the empathetic response. I’ve noticed SCoMo can’t stand being criticised and some commentators have publicly noted as much. He’s found himself out of his depth. His CE skills aren’t good enough for the challenge! Stay safe lovely Bubbles.

          6. Violetta says:

            AnneB: I knew he meant the sport; I’m just wondering how that was supposed to comfort people who were worried about still-blazing fires heading their way or mourning the loss of family members, homes, and livelihoods.

            Bubbles: I looked up that picture. I’ll bet Harvey’s mother and his late dad’s colleagues couldn’t see for tears. The fire chief gets it. PM, not so much.

          7. AnneB says:

            Violetta, yes, it’s beyond comprehension unless viewed as an instinctive cover to hide his inability to empathise when challenged. Did he think referring people to Aus’ summer national sport would comfort them? Highly possible that is what he told himself. He’s done even worse since and is being hammered by the press.

          8. Violetta says:

            He doesn’t even know how to fake it:
            1. You fly back early from your vacation.
            2. You pretend to care. You make boilerplate statements like “we’re doing everything we can” and “the whole country is pulling together. We will overcome this as we have overcome blah blah.”

            Every 10th-rate baby-kissin’ politician knows the routine.

            I guess he’s 11th-rate.

          9. AnneB says:

            For sure Violetta! I personally think he is 20th rate! He actually has tried to fake it and has said some of those things you mention. He’s been mouthing politician 101 platitudes but it’s too late and it is transparent. His lack of sincerity (beginning with Hawaii then the Cricket blunder) is being noticed by many including those directly affected who he has visited, some of his own party and journalists. He is being hammered by the press about it. I think he also stands in sharp contrast with the empathetic responses of the Fire authorities. He is also being shown up in contrast with the more sincere countenances and actions of the relevant state Premiers.. He is totally out of his depth.

          10. Violetta says:

            There are pics on DM of people trying to give injured kangaroos relief from some of their misery by washing their burns or giving them drinking water to rehydrate. It’s heartbreaking.

            Also tells you how extreme the situation is, because some places regard kangaroos as large, bouncing rats who crowd into cities at night, pick through dumps, overturn trash bins, and generally make a mess.

          11. AnneB says:

            Hahaha! Kangaroos don’t roam Australian cities at night tipping up trash cans! I’ve heard that before, it’s hilarious! In small country towns you might find them nibbling on grass in a park or in bush at the edge of town. They are culled in some rural areas owing to excessive numbers. Kangaroo steak is available!

          12. Violetta says:

            AnneB: Winston Churchill was great at that sort of thing. He may have been narcy as hell, but he understood the performance perfectly.

          13. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear AnneB and Violetta,
            The New South Wales Premier (Gladys Berejiklian) is more “hands on” than our illustrious ScoMo and his stupid smirk which has been clearly been noted by Aussies (typical narc)
            He should roll up his sleeves and hand out water n food and get dirty ….. he’s a pathetic dipstick in this huge catastrophe
            Absolute mid ranger for sure showing his true colours by trying to hand ball the fire crisis to each individual state rather than nationally and not accepting climate change
            The government has been “fining” people for back burning something the aboriginals do instinctively
            This is far from over
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

  9. Whitney says:

    He looks adorable in that photo 😍

    1. AnneB says:

      I agree. That’s one hell of a handsome reindeer there.

    2. Dorion says:

      Yes, maybe if HG included his mugshot, people would be less passionate about defending.

      1. AnneB says:

        Hahaha! Like!

      2. Claire says:

        Nah, I will still defend Rudolf:) I can tell you , Dorion that sometimes animals are better than humans. An animal very rarely will attack you without any provocation, contrary to Homo sapience species.

        Your Honour, Your Highness Glorious Tudor and Honourable Jurors, I would like to appeal the decision of the respectful Court – i.e. announcing that the hard working, respected by his peers, with a stellar performance review record, adored by the children all around the world, humble reindeer named Rudolf is a narcissist.
        He is an Empath and deserve his carrots . Even our supermarkets ran out of carrots around Christmas, no joke.

  10. AnneB says:

    Oh my Gosh, there are reindeer meat recipes being exchanged now in the comments! I am holding the Swedish Chef from the Muppets ( he has been provided with very decent lodgings and being treated well) until all this barbaric talk around eating Rudy dies down! Have to admit it’s becoming tiresome listening to him dumdee dumming away. FYC, on my way to visit as soon as the guard turnover is sorted.

  11. Bubbles 🍾 says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    New evidence Your Excellency !
    I’ve just found out Rudolph is actually a female ! 😱
    “Edinburgh University professors, Lincoln n Baird say Rudolph cannot be a male because female reindeer still have antlers at Christmas , males shed theirs before mid December ”
    Luv Bubbles xx🦌🦌🦌🦌🦌

    1. HG Tudor says:


      1. Violetta says:

        Extenuating circumstances due to Gender Dysmorphia?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          So, irrelevant.

      2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Biased !!! Male v female gender !

        1. HG Tudor says:

          You’ll have to do better than that.

        2. AnneB says:

          Bubbles, that is quite cute 😉 ooh, ooh, sir, sir!

      3. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dear Mr Tudor,
        New evidence not presented clearly results in a different verdict
        Part Quote – The Telegraph UK
        “Male reindeer have their mating season in autumn when they use their antlers to fight, but once it finishes, they cast them
        Female reindeer cast their antlers in spring, growing them back in time for winter when they need their antlers to compete with other females over holes they dig in the snow to reach lichens and to provide food for their offspring ”
        Prof Lincoln suggested if Rudolph was not a female then he may have been a enuch. When a male reindeer is castrated it stops the process of casting the antlers in the winter time and they turn into being more like females”
        He states “I wanted to remind people that it is never quite so straightforward and even females develop weapons when it comes to the real world of seasonal breeding”
        Is that any better ? Haha
        Luv Bubbles xx 🦌

        1. AnneB says:

          That is very interesting Bubbles, even if the court has rejected it as evidence.

          1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear AnneB,
            Poor Ruddi ………she has “raging female hormones” at Christmas …. it’s a very stressful time of year !
            I thought His Excellency may have been able to pull some sleigh reins!
            The majority ruled ….end of story !😢🦌
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

    2. FYC says:

      So that’s what happened! All the reindeer were on their estrous cycle and that’s why they were moody and mean to Rudi-Rudolph, not because of any narcissism! No wonder they were upset one minute, then loved Rudi the next!

      1. WiserNow says:

        FYC & Bubbles,
        hahahaha I love it! Rudolph is really Rudolpha and the glowing nose could actually be caused by blush and shimmer lotion! These new facts coming to light only now are groundbreaking.

        1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

          Dear WiserNow, FYC and AnneB,
          Who would’ve thought !
          It’s apparently based on research findings !
          I wasn’t joking 🙃 haha
          I’m never going to look at “Rudolph” the same ever again ….might have leave out some extra carrots, water, blanket, mat to sit on to keep her warm or cool and to make her comfy, shelter for protection …..she’s going to be mother and has kids to feed …. haha
          Luv Bubbles xx 🦌

          1. WiserNow says:

            I know Bubbles! Rudolph is really a girl-reindeer! You learn something new every day. Now when I picture Rudolph, the nose makes ‘her’ look pretty and feminine. It’s a bit like having lipstick on, except it’s on her nose instead of her lips.

            I’m glad Santa has a modern workplace ethic and is willing to put females in leadership roles😁

            You are a kind-hearted and thoughtful empath Bubbles, thinking of how to care for Rudolph on Christmas eve 😀🦌🥕❤️

          2. AnneB says:

            Bubbles, if only shedding Ns came as naturally as shedding an antler is to a reindeer… that leads me to remembering to keep steadily on with my learning here. Nshedding, that has a bit of a ring to it..

    3. AnneB says:

      Those Scottish professors must have eaten too much haggis (sp?) and drunk too much..whatever it is the Scots knock down at Christmas and all year round!

      1. Renarde says:


        They drink ‘scotch’! Whisky!

    4. AnneB says:

      Wait, is this true? Actually? Have not googled as I assumed you were joking, Bubbles! But then why these seemingly innocuous names of the professors? How does a reindeer “shed” its antlers? Is that the equivalent of the antler falling off? I associate “shed” with my cat shedding its hair, shedding applies only to hair and skin (reptiles, mermaids)? Well, you learn something new every day.

      1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dear AnneB,
        Haha…Nshedding ! I like it
        Luv Bubbles xx 😘

  12. Kim e says:

    “Or i may use it in a book with analysis and explanation”

    Love that idea HG.

  13. NarcAngel says:

    Well it WAS a fun exercise, but as with other matters of the heart, the initial firm and resolute decision/action is being eroded by second guessing and the emotional thinking that generally ensues.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Correct and once again you get to the logic of what my work, entertaining as it is, seeks to demonstrate and to educate

    2. K says:

      Just to be very clear, I am having fun with this.

      1. WiserNow says:

        NarcAngel, HG and K,

        I agree, it was a lot of fun and I enjoyed everyone’s creativity. It was both entertaining and educational.

        I can see it from HG’s point of view in terms of ET and LT, and I can also see it in terms of a ‘legal process’ or democratic voting process and how people’s perceptions or egos get caught up in the processes.

        It makes me think how a legal or election process can be flawed and end up with a totally illogical result, even though the ‘process’ seems to be, or is presented to be, logical at each step.

        Thanks for the exercise HG.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          You’re welcome

        2. K says:

          I thought it was a lot of fun, too, and we always learn from exercises like these. If you have the time, you may want to read the book: Just Mercy: A Story of Justice and Redemption by Bryan Stevenson. The film was released on December 25th. It’s a true story about a man who was convicted of a crime he didn’t commit.

          Be fearless and speak your mind.

          1. WiserNow says:

            Thank you K. I haven’t heard of that book or the film, but it sounds interesting. Some of the true stories you hear about wrongful convictions are beyond belief. It would be easier to understand if only one person was responsible for such a conviction, but when you think that a whole group of different people at numerous points of the process got it wrong, it makes you wonder.

            And yes, I will continue to speak my mind, even though HG probably cringes while mediating 😣

          2. K says:

            The book is short and it is one of the better ones that I have recently read. It does make you wonder; corrupt Prosecutors, unreliable eyewitness testimony and lazy cops can make a big difference in a case. Another good read is An innocent man by John Grisham; it’s a true story about two men charged with capital murder who were indeed innocent.

          3. Lorelei says:

            K—I need a long list of suggestions upcoming but I’m still hanging onto the books that are overdue! Getting my third overdue notice this past week compliments my omnipotence!

          4. K says:

            Oooh, you are so Machiavellian that you might be booted out of the Empath Club!

          5. Lorelei says:

            I refuse to return them because they’ve abolished late fees.

          6. K says:

            Hahahaha…you are just downright evil!

      2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dear K,
        A big ditto from me 🎄🦌🥕🎅❄️
        Luv Bubbles xx 😘

  14. Chihuahuamum says:

    Fly rudolph fly like youve never flown before!!😄

  15. Dorion says:

    On the validity of the verdict: I believe it wasn’t the same jury evaluating all of the suspects. Perhaps on the day when Rudolph was in the dock, there happened to be a sudden surge of narcissists in disguise coming in and voting, who simply wanted to put down an innocent individual to get some negative fuel and to misdirect attention from their own wrongdoings.
    (Reflecting on the general behavioral patterns in the Tudor Universe.)

    But wait… I am still skeptical since there is no solid evidence presented erasing my doubts. Can we be sure that His Honor is speaking the truth about what actually happened to Rudolph, how he “escaped”?

    1. Violetta says:

      Or why the security guards are presently feasting on some delicious smelling sausage?

      The heartless cads!

      And they didn’t even share it with us.

      1. AnneB says:

        They are not feasting on any such thing!!

  16. MB says:

    If it please His Most Ultra Excellent Judge of All and Everything, I request leniency of sentencing. I suggest Rudolph has done more good than harm in his lifetime, and propose his sentence be reduced to time served and the accused to be fitted with a reindeer ankle bracelet with required weekly reports to his parole officer. Although Rudolph’s escape was effected due to his narcissistic need for glory, Christmas was indeed saved. This fact cannot be denied. I trust that his excellency will appreciate that “Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever.” Free Rudolph.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Your mitigation on behalf of the convicted is noted.

      1. MB says:

        Thank you, your honor.

  17. Renarde says:

    Judge Tudor

    These ‘so-called’ jurors need to be discharged. This was clearly a mis-trial.

    I have new evidence to present before this Court. Rudolph secretly visited children’s hospitals to bring them presents. He did this without the knowledge of that fool, Father Christmas and I saw how much happiness he brought to the children.

    Indeed, one poor boy called Tim, couldn’t stop saying, ‘God bless you Rudolph!’.

    I’m extremely disappointed in this verdict and I will be urging him to appeal to the Supreme Court.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You had your chance. You had over a week to present your arguments and your evidence prior to the closing of voting. Do not bleat about a mistrial when you sat on your hands and did nothing.

      A decision, by the jury of your peers, has made its decision and justice must be administered.

      Justice delayed is justice denied.

      1. MB says:

        This is why we must have Narcissists do these types of jobs. Nobody but a Narc could sentence Rudolph. I know myself well enough to know I’d crumble. (Fall for anything, that is!)

      2. Renarde says:

        Judge Tudor.

        Your argument is facile. I was away on business. Duty calls. I suspect my peers have been ‘nobbled’

        How did you direct the Jury? I’d bet my horse hair wig you did. For shame.

  18. WiserNow says:

    OMG!😱 Rudolph escaped! I knew it! I bloody well had a feeling.

    On further thought, I have re-evaluated my initial juror’s decision that Rudolph is a normal. Now, with this new turn of events and factual evidence at hand about Rudolph’s uncharacteristic behaviour, I would like to change my decision. I now believe Rudolph is a super empath.

    It all makes more sense now. Rudolph carried on bravely as the leader of Santa’s sleigh for years and years, showing tenacity and steadfastness. Now though, facing an unfair verdict, he cracked. His escape, as caught on the CCTV footage, was not the impulsive and callous action of a vile narcissist at all. That explosive turn of events was a supernova!

    Rudolph dimmed his empathic traits long enough to con the Angel into helping him hide his glowing nose before he made a run for freedom! Sadly, the Angel was a victim in the whole scheme of things, but Rudolph calculated that she had spent long enough at the top without lifting a finger that she was due for doing some real work for a change.

    Poor Rudolph! He helped deliver presents all over the world for decades and now this! He’s being hunted down like some common criminal. Where is the justice?!

    Jury verdicts are not infallible. Juries can get it wrong and they can send an innocent reindeer to jail for years. What then? Will Rudolph languish in jail, his nose fading until it’s just a faint pink glow every now and then? Will he need to sell his story to the tabloids and hope that some documentary film-maker takes up his cause and creates a Netflix blockbuster before he is freed?

    I think Rudolph deserves an appeal and a new trial.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Too late. Should have thought more carefully before casting your vote.

      1. WiserNow says:

        You’re mean HG. Of course, we knew that already, but hunting down Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer two days after Christmas is next level.

        1. HG Tudor says:

          On the contrary YOU the readers found him to be a narcissist. He has sought to evade justice. I am merely ensuring he faces justice.

          I am not mean. I am the law.

          1. WiserNow says:

            No HG, you just *think* you are the law, as all narcissists are prone to do.

            If you used logic, you would see that relying on only the voting numbers to condemn Rudolph is not a thorough approach and is fundamentally misleading.

            The arguments advanced within the comments section about Rudolph (that accompanied the voting numbers) clearly demonstrate that there were more jurors with stronger arguments stating that Rudolph was not a narcissist than the arguments claiming that he was one. As the judge, it is your duty to evaluate the entire scope of the jury’s arguments both for and against.

            This is clearly a case of incomplete and skewed adjudication.

          2. HG Tudor says:


            “you would see that relying on only the voting numbers to condemn Rudolph is not a thorough approach and is fundamentally misleading.” – So if I rely on the fact that more people voted for narcissist, then any other category, I should ignore that. Okay, while I am at it, shall I telephone the leaders who have been democratically voted into office that sorry, although you received the most votes compared to anybody else, this is fundamentally misleading.

            If people advanced an argument and failed to vote in accordance with that argument, then more fool them.

            I have yet to find a democratic process which consists of the votes and “counting the arguments” advanced elsewhere.

            You were given votes, if you failed to use them you have only yourselves to blame.

          3. WiserNow says:

            We’re talking about a court case and trial here with arguments advanced for and against. It’s not an election. So, your example is not appropriate and as such, your argument is invalid.

            Since you’re being stubborn about this, and there appears to be no way to appeal for clemency, I reluctantly step down and regretfully leave Rudolph to suffer his fate. Rest assured though, the Court of Tudor will have a historical black mark against its name for treating the most famous reindeer of them so harshly.

          4. HG Tudor says:

            More nonsense.

            Would you rather have the opportunity to express your arguments and then vote and the vote carry the result OR
            Would you rather have a series of arguments advanced by everybody with one person making the decision ?

            What do you think a jury trial is? It’s an election.

            Rest assured there is no black mark against this court.

          5. WiserNow says:

            Ok HG, you have made your point, loud and clear. I still think Rudolph is not a narcissist, but I accept that the voting indicates otherwise.

            Poor Rudolph.

          6. HG Tudor says:

            Took you long enough!

          7. Renarde says:

            Would you rather have the opportunity to express your arguments and then vote and the vote carry the result OR
            Would you rather have a series of arguments advanced by everybody with one person making the decision

            Cannot argue with that logic at all. But equally what of I argue as someone who holds a mandate, that both systems are thoroughly flawed and both are open to corruption and false service by those who seek power.

            The second case you deliniated is Absolute Monarchy. Which can work, right until the point it didn’t. Now, where are we with our HoP. We ate a mockery. MPs breaing like cattle in the chamber.

            I know we are talking about the Court but jurors are elected or in politics selected. Discrete bias must creep in.

            Rudolph is innocent.

    2. AnneB says:

      Hi Wiser, in this case I think ultimately this Angel agreed to help Rudolph escape because it suited her to do so at the time. Lucky for Rudolph!

      1. WiserNow says:

        hmmm… it’s not really clear to me why or how the Angel ended up on Rudolph’s nose (!) The mind boggles really…

        Yes, it was lucky for Rudolph because it gave him enough time to evade the guards and make a run for freedom.

        Whatever the reason for the Angel sitting on Rudolph’s face and hiding his nose, I’d say it wasn’t purely innocent, seeing as how the so-called “Angel” has received a fairly strong verdict of being a narcissist.

        1. AnneB says:

          I agree Wiser! Premise: The Angel is an N, Rudolph is an E (found by the majority of being an N and therefore under this law, an N but knowing himself to be unfairly accused and an E -that is my position.).. Angel helps Rudolph to escape by sitting on his nose. However she got there (did Rudolph ask, did Angel volunteer?) it suited her purposes to do so. Rudolph wants to preserve himself. He seeks escape. Lucky for him this Angel found that it was convenient for her to assist him.

          1. HG Tudor says:

            She’s still going to the bottom of the tree and she will have her wings singed for aiding a fugitive from justice.

          2. WiserNow says:

            You’re quite enthusiastic about these punishments. Are you a sadist in addition to being a narcissist and a psychopath?

            Anyway, since Rudolph escaped prior to the verdict being announced and prior to sentencing, doesn’t that mean that technically, he wasn’t convicted of anything at that point in time? So, the fact that the Angel was sitting on Rudolph’s nose at that moment cannot be taken to be “aiding a fugitive” as the Angel had no firm knowledge that Rudolph would actually escape or that he was guilty of being a narcissist.

          3. HG Tudor says:

            I am.

            One can be convicted in absentia.

          4. WiserNow says:

            I hope you’re not a real judge then HG, since you’re all three of those things. Are you actually involved in the legal profession in some way?

            Again, this is all looking dire for Rudolph. How he ended up in this predicament is beyond me.

          5. HG Tudor says:

            He ended up in this predicament because those who voted for him as a narcissist was the largest number of votes. How many times must this be stated?

          6. WiserNow says:

            I accept that the number of votes for him being a narcissist were the highest. It’s beyond me why people would vote that way though. Anyway, c’est la vie.

          7. HG Tudor says:

            That’s fair comment.

            Why not ask the voters?

          8. WiserNow says:

            Ok HG, I will.


            If you voted that Rudolph is a narcissist, can you please come forward and provide a brief comment explaining your reason/s for voting that way?
            This would provide confirmation that these votes are indeed valid and would reassure the court that Rudolph’s conviction is appropriate and just.

          9. Chihuahuamum says:

            Wing singed 😄

        2. Violetta says:

          The Angel appears to have developed a habit of sitting on things.

          1. AnneB says:

            Yes, it is curious. What does she gain from this I wonder?

          2. WiserNow says:

            Yes, the Angel seems to like ‘the good life’. Sitting at the top of the tree where she has the best view and then finding any excuse to sit on Rudolph’s nose…

    3. AnneB says:

      Juries can and have, of course, sent innocent people (people innocent of the crimes they are accused of) to worse than life imprisonment.

      1. WiserNow says:

        I know AnneB. There are real-life cases that are staggering and remain hidden until exposed in the media years after the sentencing. That’s why Rudolph should have a re-trial, to remove any doubt.

        1. AnneB says:

          Wiser, Appreciated. But my understanding is that re-trial is not an option here. Rudolph must have known this and elected to get the hell out of dodge.
          Rudolph needs to stay away! I am glad that he pulled off an esacape!

        2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

          Dearest WiserNow,
          There were some issues with the “voting button” not appearing and being able to vote (which was later reinstated at my request)
          I therefore suggest tampering with the voting was in play and clearly “Your Excellency” was at fault (who knows what went missing)
          We will never know and can only go on “his hearsay” being that he himself is a fully blown n known narcissist presiding over this court ruling
          I rest my red nose’s defence!
          Luv Bubbles 🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌🎅

          1. HG Tudor says:

            You made no mention of these issues at the time. Thus you either felt them to be of no consequence or you invent these matters after the event.

          2. WiserNow says:

            Great point Bubbles! Thank you for your comment and for pointing that out.
            This ‘legal case’ has some mega-sized holes in it and poor Rudolph is paying the price for that, big-time.
            It seems that everyone, me included, thought it was all fun and games at first and just went ahead and pressed the button (if and when it was working) and thought we were oh-so-clever, describing Rudolph and pretending we were hot-shot lawyers, and now look at what’s happened?
            Rudolph is being hunted down by a judge who’s a psychopath!!!
            Who could have predicted that would happen?
            There are even some (apparently heartless) court spectators who want to see Rudolph grilled so they can enjoy reindeer sausages or cook up their favourite 12th Century Christmas stew!! Jesus!
            The world is slowly turning into an overpopulated, regressive bunch of barbarians, Bubbles!
            Seriously, I don’t know what to think about it all, but it’s exactly the opposite of what Christmas is supposed to be all about.
            I hope you’re well by the way and I hope you had a lovely Christmas.
            Best wishes to you for a great 2020! 😉🎄🎉😘

          3. HG Tudor says:

            I’m not hunting him down. Read the article and be accurate. The marshals are hunting him.

          4. WiserNow says:

            Ok HG, you’re not the one literally hunting him down, but who ordered the Tudor marshals to hunt him down?

          5. HG Tudor says:

            The law.

          6. WiserNow says:

            Since you stated in a previous comment that you are the law, then that would mean that you ordered the marshals to hunt him down, yes?

            As you said in a reply to me yesterday, “I am not mean. I am the law.”

          7. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear Mr Tudor,
            I brought it to the attention of Your Excellency on the Harry Lime page ….. which “apparently” was “supposedly” corrected …..all heresay from Your Excellency
            However, defaulting with voting rights makes the whole judiciary system null n void
            Free the “female” deer 🦌
            Luv Bubbles xx 🦌

          8. HG Tudor says:

            It was corrected. Neither supposedly or apparently. Don’t insinuate inaccuracy.

          9. Violetta says:

            15th century.
            What kind of a girl do you think I am?

          10. WiserNow says:


            Was I a little bit out in my centuries? Sorry about that.

            You sound like the kind of girl who wouldn’t hesitate to chop Rudolph up and throw him into a stew. It sounds like a very tasty stew, however, it’s Rudolph. He’s not just any old piece of venison.

            His absence will mean that Santa will have to rethink his delivery process. Without Rudolph, how will he get through the fog? It has the potential to ruin the hopes of children everywhere and then the statistics about worsening childhood anxiety will get even worse!

          11. Violetta says:


            Bugger Santa. I’d like Rudolph a lot better if he’d stood up to Santa at the end and said, “After the way you let the training sessions for fawns turn into a cross between boot camp and Gordenstoun, the way you allow emotional abusive in reindeer families, you think I’m going to make you look good? Cram it, fat boy!”

            Then he’d go work for the Easter Bunny.

      2. AnneB says:

        H.G. Re this angel on the tree aiding Rudolph, I understand she’s got what’s coming to her. I always suspected her of being a lesser,she may have helped Rudolph for immediate fuel/control in that moment (unconsciously) ie, maybe she got the attention of an onlooker and that fueled her…well it could be anything…. She did it for herself but Rudolph benifits longer term, while she gets a wing singeing for her fuel dollop.

      3. Renarde says:

        They certainly have. Many times.

    4. Notme! says:

      He can’t be a bit of a narcisisst, he can’t be sometimes a narcisisst, he can’t be on and off a narcissist. No excuses, no cop outs. Once you know, you show (him the door to the dungeon). Any thoughts or opinions which offend this golden rule are emotional thinking, they are a con and must be rejected.

      1. WiserNow says:


        Who are you talking about? HG? or Rudolph?

        The man who openly admits he is a narcissist, psychopath and sadist?

        Or the children’s nursery rhyme character who helps Santa deliver presents all over the world every Christmas?

        It seems to me that (almost) everyone here on the blog is totally ready and willing to believe and respect every single word and action that HG says and does. While God forbid anyone object to the results of a single voting exercise that will now put Rudolph in jail with no further scope to look at the legal process involved.

        I’m being deliberately provocative Notme! and I don’t mean to direct any kind of argument towards you. I’m just seeing the whole exercise in a ‘big picture’ kind of way, which includes HG’s reputation here on the blog as well as the legal process that ended up with Rudolph being condemned, as well as everyone’s reaction to the whole thing.

        Also, I’ve been in “no win” kind of arguments with HG and others a number of times here on the blog, so I’m getting used to it. It still doesn’t make me want to back down, shut up, and believe everything just because HG says it. I think it’s valuable to question things and communicate.

        It’s interesting that one vote is now considered entirely ‘valid’ and Rudolph is the bad guy and we can’t second guess or question that. Isn’t that ‘black and white’ thinking? The voting was based on a list of ‘facts’ given to us by a narcissist. But the narcissist can’t be questioned or the process can’t be questioned. Isn’t that ‘black and white’ thinking?

        Also, I openly challenged HG and questioned the ‘legal process’ repeatedly and stood up to him in that way. But because of HG’s position here as the ‘leader’ of the blog and the ‘boss’ of everything, it’s me who is being ignored or chastised, because *of course* HG can’t do a thing wrong. Isn’t that black and white thinking as well?

        I’m not saying you can’t think what you want to think. You’re free to do what you want. It might help to keep things in perspective and look at the bigger picture sometimes too.

        Thank you for your message though.

        1. AnneB says:


          This is an exercise. The voting system applied to all the other captives as well. Do you disagree with those verdicts? No, you are happy that the Angel was found to be an N right and enjoyed learning of her sentence, right? So did I.

          1. WiserNow says:

            Yes, it’s an exercise. Maybe I’m overthinking it. If Rudolph was voted a narcissist, who am I to object to the process? That’s the verdict of the juror’s votes and that’s that. Rudolph is a narcissist. I’ve just gotta accept that.

          2. Violetta says:

            The Angel’s position is Santa’s fault too:

            One Christmas Eve, Santa was under a lot of stress.

            He and Mrs. Claus had just had a fight, it was nearly time to leave and his sleigh wasn’t loaded, and the elves were talking about going on strike.

            Then an angel walked into his office and asked, “Hey, Santa, what do you want me to do with this Christmas tree?”

          3. AnneB says:

            He replied “shove it up your**se”?

        2. AnneBA says:

          Wiser, I do not concur with the majority votes in the case of Rudolph. I have not experienced anybody here trying to shut me down or up about that. If I did, I would say, please stop making me try to change my mind (in this case because my mind is made up on what Rudolph is). I’m sure you will be able to see this point. Please Wiser, take a step back.

          1. WiserNow says:

            Don’t worry AnneB. It’s all good. I am resigned to the fact that the Court of Tudor should not be messed with, regardless of the voting outcomes. Rudolph has been found to be a narc and that’s that.

            Still, if Rudi wants a safe harbour, I will happily let him hide out in my backyard, narcissist or no narcissist.

          2. K says:

            Did you read this: Anybody assisting or harbouring this fugitive from justice can expect to be dealt with severely.

            *cough* plausible deniability *cough*.

          3. WiserNow says:

            Yes, I saw that announcement made by the Court of Tudor.

            I also read that Trump, the so-called ‘leader’ of the developed world, said he’d make a big wall to keep ‘bad’ people out; that BoJo said he’d ‘get Brexit done’ because that’s what the people of UK want; and that the Australian PM was on holiday in Hawaii while his country faced the worst bushfire season on record and said on radio, “I don’t hold the hose” when questioned about his leadership.

            These ‘leaders’ were voted in by the majority. Does that mean the process shouldn’t be questioned? Or that the voters had the awareness and insight to actually know what the outcome of their votes would be?

            About your mention of ‘plausible deniability’, what do you mean? I’m not quite sure.

          4. AnneB says:

            ScoMo is so likely to be a Narcissist. The Hawaii holiday clinched it for me. It reminded me of when Putin took his time coming back from holidays when the Kursk went down.

          5. WiserNow says:

            I agree AnneB. His attitude towards the fires and the volunteer firemen was very detached. He didn’t respond to the disastrous situation with any urgency or genuine concern. Some of the things he said to the press were also very narcissistic.

            When you think that the future of the whole planet’s environmental state is in the hands of these kinds of ‘leaders’, it’s frightening. They need to be making urgent changes now so that things improve in future and they’re not taking it seriously.

            People here on the blog often say that narcs are good at doing what needs to be done because they’re bold and they don’t get emotional etc, however, some of the narcs in leadership positions we see these days don’t have that kind of inspired mentality or vision at all.

          6. K says:

            This statement is very incriminating (Empathic traits of justice (Savior Empath), compassion and truth seeking coming to the fore).

            “Still, if Rudi wants a safe harbour, I will happily let him hide out in my backyard, narcissist or no narcissist.”

            When the Tudor Marshals come knocking:

            1. Be preemptive, get the hell out of dodge (deploy an Absent Silent Treatment).
            2. Don’t answer the door (Present Silent Treatment).
            3. Blame Shift: I must have drank too much egg nog when I said that.
            4. Lawyer Up and deploy the narcissistic trait of Stonewalling.
            5. Rewrite it. That’s a lawn ornament in my back yard you twits (verbal insult), if you don’t get off my property, you’ll be hearing from my lawyers (threat).

            Good luck, because when the Tudor Marshals come knocking, you are gonna need it!

            In case it all goes to Hell, I will bail you out of the clink.

          7. WiserNow says:

            Thanks K! I’m glad I can turn to you if things get to the point I need to be bailed out. Phew! It’s good to know the right people! 😉👍

            Yes, I don’t think I could hide my empathic traits even if I tried. They are very incriminating. Ever since I was little, I couldn’t lie with a straight face🙄

            Lately though, I’ve found that with greater awareness about narcs and more understanding about my own reactions and thought processes, I’m less inclined to find that empathic traits are ‘sins’. When I see them in other people, I think they’re great and they give me a positive feeling. You just have to use them with awareness and know who you’re dealing with.

            Thank you for your list of narcissistic responses. It’s great the way you have also given the underlying narc behaviour.

            I need to practice them and get better at responding in these ways when needed. These strategies don’t come naturally to an empath. They go against the grain. They’re ‘cognitive’ rather than instinctive, which means they take time and thought, and in a critical situation, like when the Tudor marshals come knocking on the front door, it could be too late😕

          8. K says:

            Hahahaha…don’t worry! I know people who know people (wink, wink). Hahahaha…you couldn’t hide your E traits if you tried; they are blatant.

            You are absolutely right; our traits are not “sins”; they are assets and valuable ones at that. When I see genuine E traits in others, I am shocked and, sometimes, overjoyed and think: Holy crap! It’s one of my kind!!!
            And I agree; it’s imperative that we recognize who we are dealing with so we can protect ourselves and our loved ones.

            It was a fun demonstration of both empathic and narcissistic traits and how Emotional Thinking can corrupt them both. Our empathy is automatic and unthinking, which can get us in trouble, and cold hard logic is the way to go.

            Thanks to Lorelei, I caught this gem in How to Make a Request to a Narcissist.

            “Keep in mind also that your emotional thinking is far more likely to govern your responses if you are with us in person and this will result in your providing automatic responses which will go against your aims.”

            Welcome to team Rudolph!

          9. Lorelei says:

            K—it’s going to take some convincing to make me think empathic traits are “valuable.” Please expand. Oh I mean I get the concept. I don’t find it to have been helpful at all so far!

          10. K says:

            Drawback: our empathic traits attract narcissists.

            However, on the plus side, I have used truth seeking, understanding, honesty, tenacity and compassion to navigate my way through narcsite and my emotions, which has set me free.

            When used with logic, our empathic traits are assets that can benefit ourselves and all those who we interact with in significant ways, like the ripple effect.

          11. Lorelei says:

            I’ll be here awhile trying to figure this one out. I’m resentful at the moment.

          12. K says:

            I used my empathy/empathic traits to learn to look through the eyes of the narcissist from his/her perspective/worldview. It is called perspective-taking and it wasn’t easy; it took me three months to learn detachment. I had to invalidate myself/POV.

            If you have Netflix, check out season two of MIndhunter; Wendy Carr talks about empathizing with psychopaths by invalidating yourself.


          13. Lorelei says:

            I’ll actually watch this K. I don’t watch a lot of anything ever but will. I’ll be up coughing through the night so why not. I did reply and it was maybe a poorly regarded post and I apologize to HG but the short non rule-breaking version is that I can’t fathom having empathy for someone mistreating others because of a different perspective. It’s admirable if someone can be that global in their view—I’m just not there.

          14. K says:

            Season One:
            Pay attention to the scene with Richard Speck. Holden realizes that he has to mirror Speck, so he starts off with: What gave you the right to take eight ripe cunts out of the world? Then pay attention to how the rest of the interview plays out and Wendy’s analysis.

            Wendy and Bill weren’t happy with Holden but, in season two, Wendy Carr realizes she has to mirror during an interview and then Holden’s method makes sense to her.

            Empathizing with the narcissistic perspective is mostly about understanding it, but I recognize that it isn’t their fault, this was done to them as children and I feel compassion for all victims of child abuse irrespective of personality. HG has said we don’t have to like it but we should try to understand it.

          15. Lorelei says:

            How can I fix my attention deficits to get through season one to get to season two?! I thought it was one episode period.

          16. K says:

            Hahahaha…Season One: E:9. Enjoy!

          17. K says:

            It’s ok if you are not there or don’t ever get there. When my ET was reduced, my LT led the way to understanding.

          18. Lorelei says:

            I have empathy for the child struggling to find safety yes. I have a detailed comment under the creature that HG posted. Of course for a child. But what I said then holds true now. Once the narcissist is born from this lack of control environment my compassion vacates. It’s no longer directed at the child because what takes over is a shell of what could have been. HG gets a different type of “pass” due to his self awareness and the work here. Personally, I do not want to read his stories of shenanigans toward others though because it interferes with being neutral for me. I’ll read it if there is a message that is helpful—but I don’t appreciate the behavior because I think of the hurt person. Now if it is directed toward a douche bag then sure, but not the Joanne story from the golf course type of stuff. I know you aren’t ever promoting that anyone needs to just take it because they (narcissists) can’t help it—there would be no market for recovery if we were to just stay bent over. I do logically understand the “why” but I don’t accept I have to be a recipient any longer. Which is why we are here of course. We are really fortunate actually—the other “narcissist” helpers online or wherever are missing the mark and not helping in the way HG can and does. I used to think he wasn’t a narcissist and it was a business plan for a psychologist! Hahaha! I guess not. My ET evolves and wraps around me differently from day to day. I’d like to tramp it’s evolution into the ground permanently. I do have moments of sadness for my ex as his existence is so rudimentary. I have had fleeting moments of this. I know many narcissists who seem less laden by their disorder. Like yes they all need control—but for him it’s dominance interferes with even taking a casual piss!

          19. K says:

            It is quite the conundrum, isn’t it. Although I have empathy for narcissists, I do not think we should allow ourselves, or our loved ones, to be victimized/targeted by them at all. Logically, we should be applying NC across the board, however, in social, work or school environments this is very difficult to do, so we must strive for Zero Impact to address situations like these.

            Like childhood diabetes, these children didn’t ask to have NPD so I always try to keep that in mind, which gives me perspective when looking at the disorder as a whole and I am not as angry about it as I used to be. Now, I direct my anger and contempt towards the APA and the “experts” who have absolutely no idea what they are dealing with.

          20. Lorelei says:

            Excellent points K. I do indeed understand and regard the pursuit of fuel as pathetic to watch at times. In fact, think of the mid ranger low on fuel frantically trying to remedy by posting threats on here and they don’t even know why they do it!! Or the chaos they engage in day to day.. It’s an endless cycle of shenanigans. (From my viewpoint) The experts are often creating more havoc. I met with one today about an administrative matter. She used to be an HR rep that represented me in another work life and we met (on the phone so I didn’t infect her) and discussed a scenario. She generally believes people’s behavior is fixable—she is very altruistic. Now she is the top HR rep for a large company.. This should quality her expertise as “expert.” Well of course it’s fixable in the short-term. Until it manifests again because they are a narcissist! It’s exhausting and why I won’t do admin work again. I don’t want to breastfeed narcissists anymore. It’s an endless life sucking drain.

          21. K says:

            Exactly, they are unaware and, although it may seem pathetic/insane/stupid from our POV, now we know the reasons why. Think of Tourette’s syndrome or Schizophrenia; they cannot help it. These people have no choice.

            HR and many of the experts are both useless and toothless. Personality disordered individuals are a huge problem in the work place and it needs to be properly recognized and addressed. Narcissists are very exhausting to deal with so state your case once, walk away and don’t look back.

          22. Lorelei says:

            I have had some mild success framing him (my ex) as essentially functionally developmentally disabled. Truly. But for some reason I can’t keep it that way all the time and just seeing him infuriates me. If I don’t have to look at him for a long period I am ok. When I see him I am furious and disgusted.

          23. K says:

            That’s quite normal. It is going to take a year or more to get your ET to a manageable level, then the LT will slowly take over afterwards. Just read and post your way through the disgust and anger. Keep venting; don’t stop until you have exhausted your feelings. Spew lava balls of hate, like a volcano, in all directions. It will make you feel better. Vent your spleen!

          24. Lorelei says:

            Good god it’s already been nearly two years since he moved. Divorce final in July—must be related to how f*^%#** long he made us miserable. This is ridiculous. Unbelievable. I hated him for years—HATED him. I don’t hate him any less now.

          25. K says:

            Hate is great (fuel)! How long have you been on narcsite? Base your progress from that point. Reading and posting helped me get my ET under control. Read and vent and don’t stop until your hate is spent.

            NC/Low Contact + accurate information + time = a better place.

          26. Lorelei says:

            I just looked. I would say the end of Sept 2018 as far as finding it. I thought it was a narcissism business center hahaha and had divorce documents reviewed. That is how I was able to look it up just now! I would say not actively grasping much until the past spring. I thought HG was a narcissism imposter until probably the summer. In summary, way to long for being this pissed off! This bananas.. The concept has taken awhile to be fully realized. This is very hard to grasp because I’m usually near the top of the class. With no effort. This is kicking my ass.

          27. K says:

            Don’t beat yourself up about being pissed off or for feeling hate. Empaths have strong emotions, that is why we are targeted. You’ve only been here for a year and three months, not long enough to get your ET under control. The first year is a wash because of ET, however, LT sneaks in, if you allow it, don’t fight it. That’s why it is so important to understand the Narcissistic perspective. If you feel stuck, consider doing the ETA or Zero Impact (ZI); it will move things along exponentially.

            Hahahaha…a Narcissism imposter. HG is the real deal!


          28. Lorelei says:

            Thanks K. I am exceptionally frustrated of course. I’m glad no one told me how bad off I was when I got started because this is bad enough. I have a really overwhelming month ahead too—I need to study for an exam that is scheduled the 29th and it’s so hard because I’m working another job starting next week in addition to my current stuff. (Same place—different assignment)
            Fortunately it’s a nice progress marker—12 months ago my mind would have been unable to tolerate what I’m doing now. I was too much in a fog. Whatever happened to those 30 day poolside rehabs in Arizona for people that like pills? I am not a poolside girl but they had comfy couches in the common areas. This sucks. HG has not one damn bit of furniture or scenery.

          29. K says:

            You are welcome Lorelei
            Your frustration is understandable and just about everyone who comes here does so in a Fog of cognitive dissonance. You have a busy month ahead so approach it with logic. Set aside time for your ET and then, when that time is up, let it go and focus on studying and your other job. Your time is valuable so decide how much of it you want to spend on your ET.

            Hahahaha…you know the drill, Lorelei. This is Narc Boot Camp and there are no comfy couches, only cold hard logic!

          30. Lorelei says:

            Thanks K—it is a busy month and I’m curious how to manage it all. I am somewhat befuddled on the return of thinking less logically—I’ve had mild spurts of success with it diminishing at times but I just may be less inclined than others to be successful for long periods. When it’s diminished in the past it may have just been the fluidity of how it naturally waxes and wanes. I’m not sure. I don’t think it’s a mainstream therapy concept. (For much reading)

          31. K says:

            You are welcome Lorelei
            We all process emotions differently and stress can exacerbate unresolved ET. It’s been two years since your Ex moved and you still have very strong feelings about it, which is normal, however, it’s also important to make progress so you can move forward.

            Ask yourself: How long do I want to be miserable/feel this way?

            1. Another year.
            2. A decade,
            3. Or, fuck this; I don’t want to do this anymore. I am all done.

            Don’t waste another minute. Be proactive, take control and make a plan. Google: Freud anger tuned inward and read. See if that makes any sense. My IRL empath buries her feelings by overeating junk food, smoking and popping pills (meds don’t work) and she is fucking miserable. She slit her wrists; it was bad. Don’t let that happen to you.

          32. Lorelei says:

            Thanks K. Your feedback is very kind. I have an exciting year ahead indeed. I have a robust travel itinerary planned up through the fall—which actually delays a teaching job but oh well. (My work travel companion asked me to go somewhere unique out of the blue and I said what the hell..) I’m hoping the men are more appealing than the last places she took me—that was really slim picking.. I’m doing things indeed—but the issue is that I take myself with me wherever I go and I feel very heavy. I am considering some volunteer work with an established program that partners with Job & Family Services—I think getting out of my own head may be beneficial. It can’t be any worse than volunteering to bathe cats at a shelter. I do really like cats though.

          33. K says:

            It’s good to get out and travel or volunteer, however, this statement is very important: “but the issue is that I take myself with me wherever I go and I feel very heavy.”

            When I first discovered narcsite, I was doing volunteer work for a GED* Program but I was so sad and miserable that I couldn’t do my job correctly. I realized that this was the case (that’s honesty and LT at work) so I quit the program, stayed here and kept reading and posting until I felt better. Now, I am thinking of going back.

            Here’s the question: Are you dealing with your ET or running away from it?

            I love cats but they will scratch your eyeballs out if you try to bathe them. It’s like dealing with Linda Blair from the Exorcist.

            *General Educational Development helps adults, who were unable to complete their high school education, get a high school equivalency certificate, which is the reason why I had quadratic equations and the Pythagorean theorem on my chalk walls; I had to relearn them so I could help others pass the test.

          34. K says:

            Sorry for the late response; I missed the “ticket on the way home” comment.

            Suicide is serious so I am going to be blunt. Your ET is off the charts and you should consult with HG. Please, don’t waste another moment. You don’t want your ex and his IPPS raising your children. It is officially winter and, if things still feel insurmountable, then why waste another minute?!? ET is the enemy and, right now, it’s kicking your ass! Fight back! Take control and e-mail HG. I can guarantee that you will have wished that you had done it sooner, like over the summer. He helped foolme1time so he can help you, too! Don’t wait; do it.

            There is never a good reason for a child to be raped, ever. Period. Many narcissists get away with child abuse and are never held to account and that is unacceptable and that needs to change. Think of the Catholic Church Sex Abuse Scandal. It is my hope that one day HG’s work will be taught in every school/institution around the world and become part of our everyday vernacular.

          35. Lorelei says:

            I’m sorry K—that post may not have been clear. This was a reference to a different time. Not now. What I was saying was that when my energy returned I was struggling but this was time past. Of course I could not leave the children to my ex and his girlfriend. They already complained about the shitty hotel he took them to last summer. Apparently the girlfriend isn’t very particular about her surroundings so he can get away with the Motel 6. (I’m not sure which sub par establishment he took them to) My one daughter in particular was furious. Furious. I guess they holed up like crack heads sleeping partially on the floor etc. I will say he knew never to try that bullshit with me. He was always aware of not crossing the line in that regard because to do so would have meant the end of his existence. He knew the Motel 6 would save money for gambling perhaps, but he wouldn’t live to view the Dow another day. At the time I would not have said anything to anyone because I didn’t want to put anyone in a professional or personal quandary. I almost talked about it with someone that is a friend with no real professional thrust to know she may have a reporting role, but opted to think it would pass and it did eventually. My ET is high, quite high but I’m less overwhelmed fortunately. For instance, I’m almost energized in a good way to undertake this months tasks—not drained by them. I’m anxious a bit because I want perfection but that is my inherent tendency and a self imposed situation. It was not imposed on me by an abusive husband as was the need for an overhaul in other regards. I hope this illustration helps clarify. I do indeed have some very real post stress response and I’m unsure how to tackle it. It’s early in the year though so it will be interesting to see what happens.

          36. K says:

            Ok, that was good to read, however, I still think you should take a step back and assess the situation. We all have ET (the enemy within) so take control and make a plan. If you don’t exorcise all that hate, anger and frustration, it will just keep coming back to bite you in the ass. Trust me, you don’t want to go on a junk food binge cuz it ain’t pretty! If you bury your ET, it will present no matter what you do.

          37. Lorelei says:

            K—I think I hear you say that stomping ET down consistently is do-able. I’ve had occasional reductions but it’s triggered quite high by any communication with my ex because I am so angry. I feel like I’m missing the consistency element. For instance, his girlfriend dropped my daughter off a few weeks ago and I was livid. Livid. I am not jealous—I am furious he can’t shack up with a reasonable person. I mean I was furious. It’s disproportionate and I know this—disproportionate because I can’t do anything about it. But I can’t stop my blood boiling. I think I feel sorry for myself too that I actually married this fuck twit. Holy shit I got allotted idiocy in grade life!

          38. K says:

            Your anger isn’t disproportionate; it’s appropriate and you have every right to be livid and furious. He shacked up with someone who isn’t “ideal” and that must make you feel frustrated and helpless and you can’t do anything about it (lack of control), which is infuriating, and it makes your blood boil!

            You are entitled to your anger and you have every right to feel sorry for yourself. Give yourself permission to be angry. Let it out. Rant. Rage Against the Machine! Fuck “The Man”! Hate the world! Picture heads on spikes! Get pissed!

            Rage is beautiful.

          39. Lorelei says:

            Thank you! I feel dumb to stay this mad. Well it is dumb so it needs to evolve at least. K—is there a survey where HG asked readers how they found the blog?

          40. K says:

            You are welcome Lorelei
            You are not dumb and your anger isn’t dumb. Let it out, that’s what the blog is for. Here are the links. Enjoy!


          41. Lorelei says:

            K—thank you for the links. I am looking now. I am so glad I heard the term “covert narcissist” in a divorce group on FB that led me down the path. HG doesn’t like that term but it hit home and within it the truth was found. I have a fire going, a candle burning, a lit up china cabinet with reflections of light on the glassware, and a glass of red wine.

          42. K says:

            My pleasure Lorelei
            It looks like you have found the light.

          43. Lorelei says:

            I found a nice bottle of red! That is for sure.

          44. AnneB says:

            Happy New Year K! Have your read “Red Dragon’? By umm..someone Harris – it is a precursor novel to Silence of the Lambs. Will Graham, the investigator, seems to utilise his empathy to achieve the psychopathic perspective. Then he has to I guess it is something like suspending his empathic traits in order to stay with the perspective long enough to solve the crime. The character found his work painful and draining, one of the sub plots concerns him trying to get the hell out of the FBI/Quantico, but Crawford boss man keeps sucking him back in to solve more crimes (in fact Crawford exploits Graham’s guilt/sense of obligation here come to think of it). What you wrote just reminded me of that character.

          45. K says:

            I have not read Red Dragon; I tried to get my Book Club group to consider Silence of The Lambs but it was denied. They like “Chick Flick” books like, Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng.

            It makes sense; you have to set aside your worldview, which takes a great deal of effort and, initially, it was draining. You have to take on their perspective to truly understand. I can’t blame Will Graham for wanting to get out of the FBI/Quantico; psychopathy can be very unpleasant, sometime it is horrific.

            Fight Club is next on the queue and I think I will order Red Dragon, as well. If you haven’t already watched Mindhunter, you may want to check it out. Season One is excellent and you will readily recognize the manipulations.

          46. AnneB says:

            K, thank you . On your advice Mindhunter will be my next binge watch. I won’t put aside the time for that for a while as I have a lot on my plate right now.

            Silence of the Lambs is denied counsellor! Book clubs, gotta love them. In the past I’ve enjoyed their social value more than anything else.

          47. AnneB says:

            p.s. I haven’t heard of Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng. Perhaps that might be construed as a good thing, it doesn’t sound too hot.

          48. K says:

            It was dreadful.

          49. K says:

            The first season was great; I think you’ll like it.

            They denied Deliverence by James Dickey, too! Bastards!

          50. K says:

            Happy New Year, AnneB!!!

          51. K says:

            Empathy is what connects us as humans, without empathy you cannot make genuine connections with your family, friends, lovers, etc. and, by understanding how HG sees the world, I made sense of my own world.


          52. Lorelei says:

            Interesting K—I’m home now and I’ve looked at the links. (I got a fucking ticket on the way home but only I would go 80 on a holiday!) What I can say is that I’d love (on one hand) for HG to be full of shit. Fortunately or unfortunately it continues to make perfect and absolute sense and it is definitely making all of what has repeatedly happened make sense. So much so that I have to be careful not to be prescriptive in my thinking to others..
            Where I struggle is that there is an absolute and near total lack of consequence to those that have inflicted this insatiable need for negative fuel my way or toward those I care about. The construction of how we came to be this way feels quite flawed. I’m not sure there can ever be a good reason for a young child to be raped—we would all agree on this example. No one would shrug their shoulders and say, “Well he just needed fuel today.. His tank was low..” I think we all know this is absurd.
            Earlier today I jokingly mentioned it would be humorous if HG started to get booted out the door on dates because his work was so good it basically eliminated any tolerance for mistreatment! Certainly it was a compliment that the work is so accurate etc.. Of course there was no real implication that he behaves in such a way that this would be necessary at this point. But what if the information was so widely disseminated that mistreatment became less and less tolerable for people? This is an empathic wish. Absolutely. Even nearly all abusers are blind to their behavior. No mid-range narcissist says it’s great when their friend abuses his wife—they even recognize it in others. Just not themselves. The lower lessers even say the right things in the appropriate social context as I assist many of them and am happy to provide their care. Our majority view makes cognitive empathy necessary of course.
            Where having the more robust spectrum of emotion concerns me rests on several prongs. Being vulnerable to being targeted. I work in a cess pool of mid rangers. Relationships—easier now really—it will never happen again. But.. The emotional degradation to myself is very disconcerting and this is why I wish I could turn it off like a faucet. I’m actually surprised I did not take my own life this summer. I was plagued with this and didn’t tell absolutely anyone because I would never put a person or friend in a professional/ethical scenario to manage such an admission of thought. I had come to the point where the clean up felt insurmountable. It still feels that way now at times. I became incredibly and increasingly concerned as my energy was returning and I knew the combination of enough energy and despair was a lethal combination. To get to that point and take a gamble that I had to-have to hang in there was still a bitter pill. That is my interest in being in what HG has referred to as more of a safe zone. I have no doubt that any attempt would not have failed. My skill set coupled with true intention (it was not attention seeking) was causing me great concern.
            I have empathy for children in lack of control environments, but once the line is crossed into narcissism it is superseded by concern for those they will inevitably feed off of—who end up (on occasion) pretty beaten up.
            My mother would not have been able to handle losing me and this is what kept me from acting on the nearly (at the time)’constant thought of suicide. The kids of course too—their father would go through the motions to care for the kids and marry his primary source, and that too disgusted me due to who he is tangled up with. I just don’t feel being driven to such a place a full year after a relationship is over as being necessary! This is my problem in my thinking and unrelated to my ex. I can’t believe how delusional I was that I had to sit in that mess and let it get so deplorable. The empath thing is not necessary in my mind. I’d take normal over this state of affairs. It feels quite limiting.

          53. FYC says:

            Happy New Year & New Decade to all!

            K, I am so happy for you that you are set free. And well done on embracing all sides.

            Lorelei, I suggest you embrace all that you are. You have the power to determine your experience. It is not your empathic traits that are causing you problems, it is only ET. Both empathic and narcissistic traits have their benefits. A balance of both gives you the fullest experience. It is how you process your experience the the choices you make that will determine your outcome. You would not pluck out your eyes in an effort to never see another painful thing would you? If a projectile were coming towards your eyes you would duck to protect yourself. Same applies with E traits and Ns. Enjoy all E traits offer, but protect yourself when you see incoming Ns to elude inevitable pain.

          54. K says:

            Oh yeah, it’s a new decade. Happy Decade!

            Once you get it (their POV), you don’t have much choice; you are free. Bingo! Our ET is the problem, not our empathic/narcissistic traits.

          55. FYC says:

            Indeed, K!

          56. K says:

            This definition is from legal Dictionary.

            The term “plausible deniability” refers to the ability of an individual to deny knowing about something nefarious because there is no proof to the contrary. For example, plausible deniability can protect people who were either personally involved or willfully disregarded something illegal or unethical if there is no evidence showing they knew about it.

          57. WiserNow says:

            Thanks K. I see. I need to find plausible reasons to deny I’m harbouring Rudolph… and fast. I can hear the Tudor Marshals driving down the street.

          58. K says:

            My pleasure WiserNow!
            Hahahaha…oh, no! Think fast! You may want to consider a Present Silent Treatment. Good luck!

          59. AnneB says:

            One of the reasons I’m typing this under my kitchen table right now K! Stretch…ouch!

          60. K says:

            Hahahahaha…hiding under the table works!

            Bad girls, bad girls
            Watcha gonna do whatcha gonna do
            When they come for you (repeat)

            source: https://www.lyricsondemand.com/tvthemes/copslyrics.html

          61. WiserNow says:

            Do you have Rudolph there with you in the corner, standing very still pretending to be a Christmas ornament, as you type? 🤣🦌

          62. AnneB says:

            Wiser, Rudolph is apparently in some super safe secret place. If you communicate telepathically with FYC, she’ll let you know where! I’ve said a few incriminating things – the Marshalls may have me on a watch list!

          63. K says:

            Hahahaha…oh, I strongly suspect that you are on the Watch List.

          64. AnneB says:

            my avatar (moniker?) is coincidentally appropriate in the context.

          65. K says:

            Hahahaha…it is perfect! I love it!

          66. AnneB says:

            Hi Wiser, That’s fine. Christmas is almost over now so time to start wishing folks a Happy New Year. So, Happy New Year to you!;-)

          67. WiserNow says:

            Thank you AnneB, Happy New Year to you too 🙂 No hard feelings. Wherever there is a narcissist, drama seems to follow.

          68. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dear AnneB and WiserNow,
            Most Aussies are furious with ScoMo for going on hols
            and have called for him to step down
            I would say most pollies are narcs, his attitude has been appalling
            Here we vote for the “party” not person
            So far, reports are 1,300 homes destroyed and at least 20 lives lost and heaps injured, animals endless
            We’re heading for more hot weather 😢
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          69. Violetta says:

            I’ve read both Red Dragon and Silence of the Lambs. Even Will’s superiors are taken aback by what he has to do to get inside the killer’s mind.
            Red Dragon was made into a movie twice: first as Manhunter, then remade under its own title, after Anthony Hopkins’ portrayal of Hannibal Lector became the definitive one.

          70. Violetta says:

            Lorelei: Don’t blame yourself for hating. I still feel hate for people I haven’t seen since I was 12. Berating myself that they were Living Rent-free in My Head didn’t make them go away. Dreaming of the Things I’d Like to Say to Get Closure didn’t make them go away. I now realize from reading here that if I actually SAID the Things I’d Like to Say to their smug little faces, it wouldn’t give me closure (although I do have a warming memory of telling off my first shrink when I was a teenager, and storming out of his office forever).

            I know Narcsite has helped, but I’m not sure exactly how that has worked with me, yet–just that it has. I’m not as terrified that I’ll be stuck in the mental hamster-wheel forever. Maybe it’s the knowledge that “if only I had” means NOTHING when you’re dealing with a narcissist. There was NOTHING I could have done once the narcs targeted me, except get out, which I couldn’t do as a kid. The knowledge I was throwing a potentially good adult life after a bad childhood just made me feel more frustrated.

            Having trouble shaking off the effects of narc abuse is, for us, normal. You see what everyone goes through here, so please do not kick yourself for having a rough patch.

          71. Violetta says:

            Lorelei: K is correct. I highly recommend anything by Anti-Nowhere League for rage-filled moments, particularly “So What.” Metallica’s cover is also good.

            If you really want to upset the neighbors or the former in-laws, GG Allin and the Murder Junkies.

        3. Notme! says:

          Hi Wisernow,
          I was referring to Rudolph who was voted as a Narcisisst in an exercise (Narc detector). I was alluding to the fact that after his escape, some empaths started to argue against the decision (ET). I recognised this process as one that I went through while I doubted myself and HG before going NC. My comment was made up of phrases from the 10 Commandments of NC which I rely on heavily as sometimes I wish to break it and either a) Make excuses for the N or b) Tell him I despise him for wasting my time. My comment was a joke. Mostly, the exercise was fun but then it seemed to get off track and I was suggesting – light heartedly – that we were being hijacked by ET. Perhaps I was projecting as it’s clear to me that my ET makes me want to despise the N when, logically, it was me who tolerated all his crap and made excuses for him.

          I voted that Rudie was Narc and I’m sticking to it, I’m not softening, I’m not relenting, I’m not making excuses for him.
          Into the dungeon he must go!

          1. WiserNow says:

            Notme! and AnneB,

            You have taken my comment very seriously and seem to be offended. That wasn’t my intention, however, your offence kind of proves the point I was trying to make in my initial comment.

            I know this is HG’s blog. I know he is a unique and wonderful narcissist. I’ve been reading and learning from him for several years, so I am completely convinced that he is a narcissist that has made a positive impact in my life.

            The fact is though, that he is a narcissist.

            So, when Notme! said to me in the comment above:
            “He can’t be a bit of a narcisisst, he can’t be sometimes a narcisisst, he can’t be on and off a narcissist. No excuses, no cop outs. Once you know, you show (him the door to the dungeon). Any thoughts or opinions which offend this golden rule are emotional thinking, they are a con and must be rejected.”

            …it made me think that HG is a narcissist and yet we are all here learning from him and appreciating his help. Granted, HG is unique among narcissists, so he is an unusual case. However, it just made me think of the irony and black & white thinking in the sentence, “He can’t be a bit of a narcisisst, he can’t be sometimes a narcisisst, he can’t be on and off a narcissist.” …um, well, in HG’s case, yes he can.

            That was the point I was trying to make. But I can see that my point didn’t really land in the right place.

            I enjoyed this exercise and yes, I agreed with the other ‘sentences’. The way I approached the entire Christmas captives exercise was as a fun exercise that could be a bit playful and open to suggestion. It didn’t have to be as structured and ‘by the book’ like a ‘real’ court case would be.

            I guess we all approached it in various ways. I didn’t mean to offend anyone, but at the same time, I don’t feel the need to ‘step back’ if someone thinks I need to understand their version of events when they aren’t really understanding my version of events. Lets just agree to disagree.

            Rudolph’s still free, that’s the main thing 😉

          2. Notme! says:

            Hey Wisernow
            I’m not offended at all.
            As I said, my comment referred to Rudolph and was a joke using HG’s phrases.
            In relation to your comments about HG maybe being ‘sometimes a narcissist etc.’ I’d have to disagree. HG IS a narcissist all of the time and reminds us frequently to keep that in mind. I for one, never forget it, no matter how grateful I am for his insights.

          3. WiserNow says:

            That’s good Notme! There’s no need to take a vote on whether or not HG is a narc to convince anyone.

            I didn’t vote that Rudolph is a narcissist. So, as far as the voting for Rudolph goes, I still don’t think he is one.

          4. HG Tudor says:

            Really? You’d not mentioned it!

          5. WiserNow says:

            I think I did HG… just the once or twice 😉🤣

        4. Violetta says:

          I don’t care if Rudolph is a narcissist. I just like venison.

          1. WiserNow says:

            That’s totally your choice Violetta.

            Personally, I’m glad someone once had the creative inspiration to write the song “Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer” for children in the first place. If that person only cared about eating venison, there would be a little less fun and imagination at Christmas.

      2. Dorion says:

        Interesting that people reading this blog extensively would want to hide a narcissist (even if the verdict is questionable), or engage in defending them. What is the attraction, why not just enjoy that good venison dinner or give it away to some friends if someone is vegetarian? There are many handsome reindeer in the wild who do not need to be defended and sheltered, or maybe Rudolph’s peers.

        As for the world leaders, my view is that they come in a great variety and achieve votes in many different ways, also target different parts of society as their sources and supporters. I mean Trump… I have not read the discussions on him much here on the blog yet and where people would place him on the narc spectrum, but I would certainly not put him anywhere high or even middle. His tools and the ways he obtains support are definitely not the intellectual, logical variety and he does not come across as someone who achieves them with much very conscious calculation. Many other politicians (who can also be regarded narcissistic) are way more complex and sophisticated but it does not necessarily earn them more votes or higher success, in my opinion because the voters vary greatly as well.

        I think questioning the legal process is never a bad idea. The law and its enforcers are definitely not the most famous for being the most ethical, caring primarily for public welfare, it is an artificial construct just like the world of a narc. They may well have already finished that dinner days ago while others are still looking to protect the meat!

        1. WiserNow says:

          Thank you for your comment. It made me ask myself why I felt a strong need to ‘protect’ Rudolph in this fantasy-based exercise that HG created.

          I’m not a vegetarian and I enjoy a tasty meat stew as much as the next person. I also don’t have any affiliations or vested interests in protecting reindeers in ‘real’ life in terms of wildlife or environmental causes.

          You are correct that I read HG’s blog extensively and that I wouldn’t go to great lengths to protect or defend a ‘real’ narcissist if they were found guilty of a crime.

          In the case of Rudolph though, I instinctively disagreed with the verdict that he was a narcissist. This is because:
          1. I don’t believe he is one, based on HG’s ‘facts’; and more importantly,
          2. Rudolph is a positive childhood memory (not for any specific reason but in general) that I would not like tarnished or ruined, both for myself (now as an adult) and for children who are currently listening or have yet to listen to the song. I want to keep Rudolph the Christmas character alive and ‘idealised’ in my memory and in the song in general.

          In the comments here on the blog, reindeers have been described as:
          1. Rudolph, the imaginary reindeer that helps Santa
          2. Reindeers, the animals that live in forests in real life
          3. Venison, the meat used for cooking and found in butcher shops and supermarkets.

          In your own mind, you can place all of the above in one category and then ‘Rudolph’ and ‘venison’ would have the same meaning to you. You wouldn’t care about Rudolph being chopped up and used for meat, because 1 and 3 are both equal in your particular value judgement.

          If, in your mind, you see the three categories above as having different meanings or connotations or memories for whatever reason, then you wouldn’t consider Rudolph to be the same as venison, for example. In that case, the thought of Rudolph (a happy childhood memory) being killed and eaten as meat found in a supermarket would be disagreeable or emotionally negative.

          Regarding your comments about leaders, yes, there are many different leaders and they can vary greatly when it comes to where they fit on a narcissistic spectrum. The kind of leader a country has also reflects the country’s culture in general and its society or social beliefs.

          It’s also not really appropriate to blame all the faults within a ‘construct’ on the leader in that construct. That in itself is blame-shifting or scapegoating. You could argue that if the majority were well-informed enough or cared enough, they would go to greater lengths to vote for better leaders.

          Then again, there is limited choice in candidates, propaganda, hidden information, corruption, fear-based tactics etc used by governments to control and subdue the public in order to gain power, all of which narcissists are capable of and they are the ones who crave power.

          So, it’s an egg/chicken kind of argument. What came first, the leader’s corrupt tactics, or the society’s misinformed, apathetic or oppressed attitudes. There’s no easy answer.

          People can debate the topic until the cows come home, and in the long run, changes are slow. There is some kind of naturally evolving ‘tipping point’ though, when things reach a particular point and when the majority of beliefs start to change and that brings overall change. I don’t believe any one person or ‘construct’ can ‘force’ change. At an individual level, I think change happens when people learn or become aware of the negative consequences of their previous behaviour and make a conscious effort to do things differently. This is more of a ‘micro’ kind of change rather than a ‘macro’ kind. Over time, these micro changes slowly become macro changes.

          Thanks for your comment Dorion. It’s interesting to think about these things in greater detail.

          1. AnneB says:

            Great comment Wiser. Dorion, what she said!

          2. WiserNow says:

            Thanks AnneB. Your kind comment’s appreciated 🙂

          3. K says:

            I am almost done with Red Dragon. This is definitely not a “Chick Flick” book! Dolarhyde is a Psychopath and I think his grandmother and mother were both narcissists.

          4. Dorion says:

            Thanks WiserNow and AnneB, that makes sense. I guess I didn’t feel in a similar way when I read about Rudolph because this tale had never been part of my childhood or even life until it appeared in HG’s thread. As a kid, I knew about Santa and his reindeer, but never their name and never heard songs or anything specific about them, let alone the distinguished one with the red nose. Another not-so-nice association I just thought of could be if a person has a beloved pet, say a dog called Bella, and someone writes a sad story about a dog named Bella – emotionally, it won’t register just as a story but the wishes/projections going into it give it a stronger impact.

            Independently of the story of Rudolph, the idealization is something that reminds me of an important fact about abuse, how the initial grooming and idealization (and the idealized relationship) can prevent a victim from seeing them in a negative light and turning against them, for a long time. I believe this plays a role in supporting politicians as well – it is not truly them as a person who earns the votes but the ideology and the voters’ desire for change. It is human nature that we want to hope and believe in good things. I guess even narcissists when they believe in the relationship and the love initially, in spite of having experienced ~the same story many times before.

            By the way, if HG chose Andy Dufersne from The Shawshank Redemption for an exercise like this, I know I would definitely react differently as that character is one of my favorites from the movie world (and one I even identify with in some ways personally). I would not want him to be caught and put back in prison, let alone serve him for dinner! Definitely ET operating.

        2. AnneB says:

          I’m not hiding a narcissist. I’m not hiding an empath or a normal either (take note Marshals!).(Dorion,.I don’t concur with majority verdict here and I rejoice in Rudy’s ‘escape’.The majority is simply the majority; the letter of the law is not truth or justice; Andy Dufersne was innocent; x and y convicted murderers were fried in Texas then posthumously cleared by dna evidence). It’s not rocket sciencei is it?! (knock knock;
          Whose there?;
          Go away. ET phone home!).

          1. WiserNow says:

            You’ve summed it up very well. And I love that the conclusion of it all is ET, with the movie quote ‘ET, phone home’ – that’s just poetic and sublime!

            So true though, emotional thinking is like the fuel (!) that keeps the human (construct) machines running. It just needs to go back home wherever that is.

          2. AnneB says:

            Thank you Wiser.! 😉 I was referring to my own ET at the end. The Rocket Science ref clued me in to it! Happy New Year to you Wiser!

          3. WiserNow says:

            Happy New Year to you too AnneB! 🙂

  19. K says:

    Fie! Rudolph is an empath and you’ll never catch him; he’s in the wind.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Your fellow jurors found otherwise.

      1. K says:

        Besotted with grog, the lot of them!

        He’s got a two day head-start on you, which is more than he needs. Rudy’s got friends in every town and village from here to the Sudan. He speaks a dozen languages and knows every local custom. He’ll blend in, disappear and you’ll never see him again. With any luck he’s got a new nose already.*

        *Indiana Jones quote

        1. WhoCares says:

          Haha – that’s awesome, K.

          1. K says:

            Hahahaha…no worries! I have Rudy’s back!

          2. Violetta says:

            “I have Rudy’s back!”

            I’ll have the flank steak and the stew pieces.

          3. K says:

            Hahahaha…poor Rudy’s been reduced to a stew!

        2. AnneB says:

          Hahahaha! Got that one K, Indianna on Marcus Brodie – The Holy Grail!

          1. K says:

            Hahahaha…that was a great film and a fantastic quote!

          2. AnneB says:

            K, I think the Holy Grail is probably my favourite out of all the Raiders film, that is sometimes I like it more than the original! Sean Connery is definitely a plus! Yes, that is one of the best quotes in the whole series, it’s a beauty.

          3. K says:

            Sean Connery is hot! My favorite is the Temple of Doom followed by the Last Crusade; least favorite was Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. I loved the Soup of the Head, a.k.a. eyeball soup scene in ToD. The fifth one comes out in 2021!

            Indiana Jones: Molo Ram! Prepare to meet Kali…in hell!

          4. Lorelei says:

            He is hot for an old Scottish man!

          5. K says:

            Think: The Hunt for Red October.

          6. Lorelei says:

            Give me one ping only!

          7. K says:

            Think Dr. No: Bond, James Bond.

          8. Lorelei says:

            I was on his island in November. I bought two strands of pearls!

          9. Desirée says:

            But are they freshwater or saltwater pearls, Lorelei? Those details are important.

          10. Lorelei says:

            I have no idea—one strand is traditional ivory and the other is a mix of colors. She held a lighter to them so I assume it means they are special! They are pretty.

        3. Violetta says:

          K strikes again.

          1. K says:

            Hahahaha…Rudy is safe and sound!

          2. AnneB says:

            K, I keep referring to the Last Crusade as the Holy Grail. Duh!

            Hehe! Temple of Doom eyeball soup and heart surgery Shaman style (or was that Crystal Skull that featured extreme ‘heart massage’?).

            I love the scene in Raiders where the the chief evil Nazi (his face gets melted off later) enters the tent where Marion and Belloq (sp?). are drinking it up. What initially appears to be an instrument of torture turns out to be a collapsible coat hanger..

          3. K says:

            No worries, I knew exactly which film you were referring to. The heart surgery scene (ToD) was fantastic and the collapsible coat hanger scene was wicked funny and who can forget The Arab Swordsman’s scene in RotLA.

            Grail Knight: “He chose … poorly.”

          4. AnneB says:

            Apparently Harrison Ford improvised the Arabian Swordsman scene. To hell with all this fancy swishy swashy swashbuckling, I’m done…bang (for fs sake) can I go home now?)

          5. AnneB says:

            K, yes to Grail knight’s stating of the obvious! Heehaw (etiquette?…).

          6. K says:

            Hahahaha…there are so many great quotes in that series.

          7. K says:

            If I remember correctly, HF had eaten some of the local fare and became sick; he was too tired to engage in a battle and improvised the now famous scene.

          8. AnneB says:

            That makes sense, he does look like he wants to barf.

          9. K says:

            Hahahaha…he does indeed!

        4. Bubbles 🍾 says:

          Dear K,
          Very goood !
          You have our (🦌) back
          Luv Bubbles xx 🦌 🥕🦌

          1. K says:

            Dearest Bubbles,
            Just think: Run Rudolph Run by Chuck Berry

            Out of all the reindeers you know you’re the mastermind
            Run, run Rudolph, The Tudor Marshalls ain’t too far behind
            Run, run Rudolph, before they track you down
            hurry, hurry take the freeway down
            Run, run Rudolph ’cause I’m reelin’ like a merry-go-round

            Luv K xoxox

          2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

            Dearest K,
            Great song !
            Thanks K
            Luv Bubbles xx 🦌

    2. Renarde says:

      Absolutely K. A pre-trial is needed.

    3. E. B. says:

      I agree with you, K.

      1. K says:

        E. B.
        Hahahaha…welcome to team Rudolph!

        1. AnneB says:

          Run away
          get away
          run away
          runaway run away run away

          Pet Shop Boys [quote, attempt at]

          1. HG Tudor says:

            Reads more like the Pissed Up Boys!

          2. AnneB says:

            Caught out. Not surprising, your perception is unrivaled Your Honour!

          3. AnneB says:

            Bahahaha! H.G, very funny remark though!. PUBS.

  20. Sweetest Perfection says:

    Nooo nooo! It cannot be! My Rudolph is innocent!!! He promised me he loved me (since day one), promised one day in the near future we would travel together in his sleigh (although it still hasn’t happened and I suspect it’s not his sleigh), not to mention the collection of hot-bright-nose picks he has shared intimately with me! He is not a narcissist, he cares for me! I know because his nose gets turned on when he sees me. Wait, is that a red flag?

  21. Bubbles 🍾 says:

    Dear Mr Tudor, (Your Excellency),
    I strongly object Your Excellency
    We, (Santa) and myself will be appealing this ultra court decision ruling on the grounds Rudolph is but a mere animal and is contracted for all eternity in a work capacity purely and exclusively to Santa
    Sentencing Rudolph will severely put Santa’s work in jeopardy and affect millions of lives
    Children will be devastated no being able to put carrots out on Christmas Eve, which means they will have to eat them for Xmas lunch …. absolute catastrophe!
    Being that Santa has been cleared of any wrong doing and is a full blown empath, I ask the court to reconsider and allow Santa to take full charge and responsibility of Rudolph
    Santa will severely punish him (no chocolate) if he steps out of line
    Rudolph cannot be replaced, it’s as simple as that ! The rest of the gang rely solely on his lead
    Christmas would be ruined forever
    I beg you to reconsider and pardon him for the term of his and Santas eternal lives …they depend on each other and always will
    Thank you Your Excellency
    Luv Bubbles xx 🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌

    1. HG Tudor says:

      It was a democratic vote. You can’t appeal. It was not a court ruling but a jury decision. Blame your fellow readers, they’re the ones who voted.

      1. Pati says:

        Should we be in contempt of court then?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          For what?

          1. Pati says:

            I am just joking

      2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dear Mr Tudor,
        Then I’m appealing to everyone
        I sense bribery with too many glueweins 🍷and Christmas cake took place. I call for a new jury …. haha
        Luv Bubbles xx 🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌

      3. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dear Mr Tudor,
        Ps …. obviously tampering by Jack Frost, as one would have to wear mittens in order to cast a vote, hence wrong button being pressed
        Egg nogg is also to blame !
        Re vote !!!!
        Luv Bubbles xx 🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌

        1. AnneB says:

          yes, egg nog is deadly at 20%, as recently discovered.

          1. AnneB says:


      4. MB says:

        I didn’t cast a ballot, nor did I argue for or against any of them. I felt outsmarted and outwitted in this challenge. Nobody blame me unless it’s for inaction!

        1. HG Tudor says:

          If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.

        2. FYC says:

          MB, That would not be the case. Your participation is always appreciated and enjoyed. Tell that inner voice to knock off that barrage of bull or it will have to answer to me, and I won’t take kindly to its insults.

    2. Pati says:

      Bubbles hell I object too!!!!!
      MERRY Christmas! To you sweety!

      1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

        Dearest Pati,
        Thank you Pati…. Rudolph is just a lovely deer with a big bright red nose … it’s the weasels you gotta watch out for …. haha
        Merry Christmas to you gorgeous
        Luv Bubbles xx 🎅🦌🎅🦌🎅🦌

        1. Pati says:

          Exactly ,thank you Bubbles

          1. WiserNow says:

            Bubbles, Pati and HG,

            I object too. I say we should be able to appeal and have a new jury. After all, democracy or no democracy, it’s all subjective isn’t it? Everything, including the jury decisions and court process is a subjective construct, as we have been told before… cough, cough… by someone we all know… not looking at anyone in particular…👀

            Come on HG… make an exception for Rudolph. It’s Christmas, after all.

          2. HG Tudor says:

            No. You voted, you decided. Blame yourselves.

      2. AnneB says:

        Hell yes, Pati!

  22. Pati says:

    Rudolph is no Narcissist. He guides Santa with his bright red nose. What about Elfy HG,is he a Narcissist?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      The jury found him to be a narcissist. Therefore he is. I did not decide. I pass sentence.

      1. Pati says:

        Thank you judge !

      2. FYC says:

        Innocent people do get convicted on occasion. Jury’s are estimated accurate less than 70-90%.

        Rudolf is innocent. Given the thinly veiled threats, I have taken dear Rudolph and we have obtained asylum in another country where there is no extradition. We are GOSO and No C! You will never find us!

        1. Violetta says:

          See you in the Dungeon, FYC. I got nicked just for filing a frivolous appeal and trying to sneak in what was clearly hearsay.

          1. FYC says:

            I escaped prior to tipping our hand, so we would have to be found found first before the dungeon poses a threat. Perhaps stage your own escape and join us! Drinks are on the house! I would tell you the libation, but it may give away our location so I must withhold that detail.

          2. Violetta says:

            If it’s Glögg, be careful. The light show looks like it was somewhere in Scandinavia, so HG and Se Scyldmægd may be there, or were when the vid was shot.

          3. HG Tudor says:

            You keep spelling her name incorrectly

          4. FYC says:

            Norway is a great place to hide in plain sight, what with all the reindeer who live in that country, and the fact that their extradition treaty requires sufficient evidence of certain crimes, of which narcissism is not one. Plus, Rudolph is an empath and would delight in the beauty of such a fantastic light show. With his new waterproof nose concealer, Rudolph really goes unnoticed anyway. Who’s to say we were not there?

        2. BL says:

          Poor FYC… We know you don’t believe Rudolph is a narcissist, as you are still in your golden period and blinded by your emotions. It seems fun and exciting now, running off to a new country, “just the 2 of you”. We feel for you, really we do, but you are not alone in his fuel matrix. Soon enough Rudolph will tire of you and your adventure, and he’ll start looking for a new sleigh to pull. Oh sure, you’ll want to fix things just like you are trying to fix his fate now, but he won’t change. He isn’t worth your energy, FYC. Just give up the reindeer. We’ve got the grill fired up and we’re hungry!

          1. FYC says:


          2. AnneB says:

            And incorrect!

          3. Violetta says:

            Shame on you, wanting to grill Rudolph! I am shocked at your barbarity!

            There’s a 15th-century stewing recipe that would be much better: onions, wine, long pepper, mace, cloves, cinnamon, sugar, verjuice, bread or ground almonds to thicken it, and I always add galingale if I can get it. (The recipe doesn’t specify it, but it goes well with the other spices.)

        3. AnneB says:

          That’s more than occasionally? At least at the 70% end of the estimation.

          1. FYC says:

            AnneB, It is also estimated that only 1% of perpetrators of all crimes committed are apprehended, so it is actually a small percentage in contrast to the greater population of criminals.

        4. AnneB says:

          Will visit Rudolph when I can FYC.

          “You remember the name of the town, don’t you?”

          (I will after googling the relevant clip!)- I smile!

          1. FYC says:

            We have a glass with your name on it, AnneB, that stands at the ready to toast Rudolph’s safety.

          2. AnneB says:

            FYC, sending you my ETA via telekinisis (sp?). Oh good, you got it..yep, yep..okay…uh huh…oh yah…tada.

        5. Violetta says:

          The e-scribe and the i-scribe from Beowulf kept arguing about the spelling, so I split the difference.

        6. FYC – I hear you’re the techmaster! Are you able to take a look at my comment on ‘I spy private eye’?

          Cheers xx

          1. FYC says:

            No master, but aware. I replied.

      3. E. B. says:

        The majority is not always right.

        1. AnneB says:

          EB, yes. Here is my understanding: The majority view, the majority vote, the majority culture and so forth are simply the majority, no more and no less. Right and wrong, in the final analysis, are subjective. Personal ethical dilemmas can occur where a minority or individual is in disagreement with the majority, or where self interest and interest for the other are in conflict.

          1. E. B. says:

            Hello AnneB,

            I hope you had a peaceful Christmas!
            Although this exercise is just for fun, I would like to learn if someone is a narcissist-narcissistic-normal-empath so I can apply this knowledge in real life.
            HG is the expert. I did not know he wanted to use the American justice system.
            Since we do not have all the information, our conclusions are based on our opinion and assumptions, not facts.

            Also, when HG said “the jury had found him to be a narcissist”, I thought about the film 12 Angry Men (1957). I have seen two different versions so far and I love it.

          2. AnneB says:

            E.B., I think one of the points of the exercise is precisely that the outcome is based on our own assessments, some done in fun, others done more seriously, others straddling both. Neither way is right or wrong. The point may be, how do we deal with this? I don’t know. IRL we need to apply LT when we recognise an N and maintain that to avoid ensnarement. In terms of how those who participated cast their votes and for those who have some investment in this particular captive Rudolph, how are we all doing in the face of [if perceived as such] challenge to our conviction/LT? Does LT prevail or does ET cloud us? Will we be swayed in our original LT\vote if it does not concur with the majority? Will we fight what is in front us? IDK, these are just unformed impressions. It is not possible to get “all the information” on fictionalised and imaginary characters, I feel. Someone, can’t remember who or where, mentioned that the captives went through the NDector, but they didn’t, unless I have missed something. I replied here with a longer comment, it may be in moderation still, or may not appear. It was quite long, too long maybe and possibly unsuitable as content.

            Thank you for the enquiry about Christmas, EB!. It was quite peaceful!. I hope yours was likewise.

            and Happy New Year!

            p.s. I watched 12 Angry Men last year. I think it was really effective in showing how much individual perspective, psychology, personal experience can sway one’s perception of another, their motives, a situation. It’s easy to see how the law does not equal justice. The juror who brought the others to consider the evidence holistically without overwhelming personal bias was using thinking unhampered by emotional thinking/distortion,. It is a valuable film.

          3. E. B. says:

            Hi AnneB,

            Thank you for your long comment. IMO, fictional characters are not very useful because they do not reflect reality.
            The information about a fictional character can be found in the original book or film the character originated from (Scrooge, A Christmas Carol).
            I have seen fictional characters being mentioned and partly analysed in a psychology book.
            The Captives are just for fun. I am interested in real people like those in the series “A Very … Narcissist”.

            Thank you for your good wishes, Anne.
            I wish you a Happy New Year 2020!

          4. AnneB says:

            EB, Absolutely regarding the dangers of the jury system. I only understand the basics but even when Judges direct Juries to consider the evidence ‘objectively’ and so forth, personal and often unconscious bias will manifest. You are so right, in implying that 12 Angry Men shows how that can happen. To Kill a Mocking Bird is another classic book and film that addresses this pretty overtly.

            Talking about IRL here: I don’t disagree with Judge only trials, conditional upon there being complete public transparency and strong accountability measures in place. I know that in the legal systems of the UK and Australia (unsure re US) j criminal law permits judge only trials in certain situations, one of those being when the case has been so notorious and covered by the press that jury objectivity – in terms of applying ‘reasonable’ logic to evidence and excluding the influence of the personal – is impossible.

            I did find the exercise useful, but mostly in terms of watching my ET and LT operate during and in aftermath. For me personally, a by product was that I maintained complete no contact during a difficult time for me emotionally (Xmas) with the distraction. That kind of thing – distraction- will not do in the long term but it will do for now.

            By nature of the characters it was intended to be light hearted I think, but still get some practice in utilising concepts at the level of indentifying N red flags.

          5. Mercy says:

            E.B. Sorry to jump in your conversation, but what you said about the American justice system got me thinking how scary the majority vote really is. If the majority votes using ET rather than facts so many innocent people could be convicted. I often wonder how judges and especially lawyers can live with themselves knowing that they are fighting to win the jury, not win justice. So many fight for a criminal to be free or fight for an innocent to be convicted. It’s all about winning. The people that they are representing are just pieces in their game, they’re not even real people.

          6. E. B. says:

            Hi Mercy,
            I totally agree with you. It is scary. This is why I also mentioned the film 12 Angry Men (= the 12 members of the jury). I do not want to write about this film in case you and other people have not seen it yet. Highly recommended. It is on YouTube.

          7. NarcAngel says:

            I enjoyed 12 Angry Men (the black and white version with Henry Fonda) when I was a teen and have watched It since (was not aware there was a newer version and will look it up). It is thought provoking. Thank you for the reminder.

          8. E. B. says:

            Hello NA,
            Thank you for letting me know. I have not seen that one yet. There are older and newer versions. They say the Henry Fonda, Lee J. Cobb version from 1957, which is the one you mentioned, is the best one of all.
            There is a black and white TV version from 1954 and a theatre play from the 90’s on YT.
            (I would avoid clicking on any link in video Description. They redirect to infected sites outside YT)

          9. Mercy says:

            E.B. ok I’ll watch it. You have me interested. Thanks

    2. Bubbles 🍾 says:

      Dear Pati,
      Elf on the Shelf ???
      Hmmmmm, not sure I’d trust an elf !
      I’ve heard bad reports !
      Perhaps Mr Tudor is working on a few more …. hint hint
      Luv Bubbles xx

      1. Pati says:

        Dear Bubbles,
        I think Elfy could be a Narcissist, you are not allowed to touch him he loses his powers,he gives absent silent treatments and wont appear until next year,reports to Santa daily. Who knows maybe there will be a verdict for him next year.
        Love Pati❤💓💖

        1. Bubbles 🍾 says:

          Dearest Pati,
          I tend agree with you …. narcissist !
          I find it creepy how he just pops up here n there staring at you ! (Apparently touching it accidentally is ok, he won’t lose his powers)
          Maybe I still have issues with a doll that resembled “chucky” the weasel gifted me. It’s funny, when he gave it to me I immediately hid it away in the dark
          I didn’t have it for long, I gave it back
          Always go with your instincts … haha
          Luv Bubbles xx 😘

      2. AnneB says:

        EB, I understand. My take is that because the captives are all fictional with some not even sentinent (tree Angel, Jack Frost) and others imaginary but sentinent if they were real (Rudolph, Santa), we have been encouraged to come to our own conclusions and have not been provided with H.Gs “correct” answer (as was the case with That Big Little Lies exercise?).. There is no definite, overriding, absolute N or non-N answer with the captives. I don’t think that is what the exercise is about. That may be one reason why H.G has consistently turned queries that seek definitive answers, or seek to have a revised result, back to us. We *played* at making a call (N or E or Normal etc) using material/concepts learned here, I think part of the exercise has actually been about recognising when emotional thinking begins to obscure. In real life, there is no H.G. to turn to in the moment and ask, N or not. I am thinking this through as I write. Using the case of Rudolph. Well I made a light hearted case for him being empath and I voted that way. At no time have I felt invested or over invested in a ‘real’ way (as I am IRL with the people that I care for and love, or my ex for e.g), because part of me realises that this is a fictional reindeer. The best analogy I can think of is I watch a movie and suspend disbelief, get involved in the story, characters, cry, laugh etc, but then come out of the movie theatre and back to me and my life. Yet when H.G. had Rudolph escape, I enjoyed and was glad, because I wanted the movie/play to keep going and I am building up a story about him and committing to my decision and now belief that he is an Empath. But I am not bothered that others voted differently, nor am I bothered by the majority verdict. This feels good to me. It feels good to be able to stand for Rudolph’s freedom and leave others to theirs yet continue to interact within the play. The majority is not always right! Yes -and from that, the question is, what do you think is right? or actually, what is right for you? What do you know as right for you? Because we will do better empaths/normals in deflecting Ns out there if we know what we need to do, what is right for each of us as individuals and practice conviction and commitment. I think the lesson lies in awareness of ET, EB.. It is about how strongly we can stick to our convictions, our own values, our own senses of right and wrong. ET obscures clarity of these things. That’s as clear as I’m going to get tonight. I can see the lesson but I am falling short in my ability to articulate it.

  23. NarcAngel says:

    What do reindeers eat?

    No reason.

    1. Liza says:

      standard reindeers eat plants and mushrooms.
      santa’s reindeers eat essentialy snow, i heard rumors about fairy powder, but no official docmentation mentions it.

    2. BL says:

      As a side note, I once ate a reindeer sausage. It was quite tasty, so if we catch the sucker, there might be a delicious reward for all.

      1. HG Tudor says:

        Reindeer is indeed tasty.

        1. Pati says:

          HG what does it taste like ?

          1. HG Tudor says:


          2. Pati says:

            Ok, the only wild animal i have ever tried was Oestrich and it tasted like chicken.

          3. HG Tudor says:


          4. Pati says:

            I take it you never tried it then?

          5. HG Tudor says:

            No, I groaned at ‘it tastes like chicken’

          6. Pati says:

            Haha wasnt too bloody !

          7. Lorelei says:

            I ate some frogs and was told it was tasty like chicken and it sucked horribly. Don’t believe the chicken stories!

          8. Desirée says:

            Reindeer tastes like deer but better. Leaner, milder, less gamey.

          9. Desirée says:

            Eating frog was a scarring experience and I also heard that chicken-thigh comparison beforehand. LIES!

      2. Violetta says:

        If it’s anything like white tail or elk venison, I’m in.

      3. Chihuahuamum says:

        I grew up on deer and moose. Moose is the smelliest disgusting meat imo. I can still smell it ughhh i can also remember the skinned carcasses hanging in the garage. Looking back i shake my head. Its no wonder i rarely eat meat if ever.

    3. Bubbles 🍾 says:

      Dear NarcAngel,
      Carrots 🥕…..of course 🤣
      I think he also sneaks Santas biscuits/cookies
      Merry Christmas lovely
      Luv Bubbles xx 🦌🥕🦌🥕🦌🥕

    4. MB says:

      Glitter. Reindeers eat glitter NA. Santa’s do anyway.

      1. Violetta says:

        If that’s the case, then Rudolph’s trail should be remarkably easy to follow.

        1. MB says:

          The glittery poo will indeed make the detectives’ jobs much easier, Violetta! 😂

          1. Violetta says:

            Like King Pellinore collecting “fewmets” from the Questing Beast in The Once and Future King.

    5. AnneB says:

      NAngel , Happy Christmas! Grass?

  24. Argb says:

    How am i ever to enjoy christmas again (feign swoon)

    My favourite bringer of light…a narcissist? It cant be?

    I was about to induct Rudolph as a prophet to the church of christmas. He was to travel the rest of the year sharing his story from lame to fame and offer hope to those striving for the same.
    (one tear slowly falling down my cheek).

    I promise this jury that if rudolph comes to fulfill his obligation at the church of christmas i will aid and abett him hiding his light only to uncover it in the darkest of places where children will have the experience to know the rudolph i did. Where those who struggle can find a means to belong again.

    Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No! Its Rudolph the red nosed reindeer

    And he is no narcissist!

    Open the court! I demand a retrial! Appeal! Appeal! (pounding my fists on the locked doors of the court).

    (Please note: all of this is in the strictest of nonsense…just having some fun!) 🙂 😀

    1. AnneB says:

      Argb, I love your post. It’s gonna be ok. Rudolph will have to lay low until the political climate changes, that’s all. He has friends, he is being looked after. He knows what he is. He may have to have work done on his nose, but that area of medicine is very advanced these days and I am sure he will be able to undergo a procedure that is reversible.

      1. AnneB says:

        p.s. “lame to fame”. Nice one!

  25. Mercy says:

    He shouldn’t be hard to find. My 6 and 3 year old was tracking him on Christmas Eve.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      That was Santa.

      1. Mercy says:

        Santa must have went GOSO and found another reindeer to guide his sleigh

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Automated one. ‘It’s the future.

          1. NARCISSUS says:

            I want you to picture yourself having a conversation like this with any other person in a public place, then me approaching your back cautiously and you don’t getting to hear me approaching your back, next, me getting close enough to smell your hair, and suddenly my strong and young hands grabbing your old and weak shoulders bruptly… I want you to picture the end of such successful approaching XD.

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Hello again Darkest Cupido. Hiding behind a name change. How very Mid Range.

            If, as you state, you are in your 20s, I am indeed older than you, but I am not old.

            Yes I can picture your hands grabbing my shoulders. I now also hear your wrists break and your howl of agony.

            Run along now. You do not get to play with the big boys.

          3. Mercy says:

            That was creepy. Gave me shivers. Has this person ever threatened before HG?

          4. HG Tudor says:

            Oh repeatedly. It’s what Mid Range Narcissists do.

          5. Mercy says:

            Not very effective hiding behind a keyboard and fake name.

          6. Pati says:

            Just a threat ,she is not a Greater so she will never follow through with them.

          7. FYC says:

            Haha HG, most benevolent on your part. I find it so common that MRs have rather ridiculous delusions of precisely what they will never possess. It seems to be some pathetic form of mental masturbation.

          8. FYC says:

            With regard to the name change, instead of Darkest Cupido, perhaps Dim Stupido would serve more accurately.

          9. Pati says:

            I love the come back lines priceless!!!!
            No one can mess with you HG! Love it !

          10. NarcAngel says:

            The picture is of your sorry attention seeking ass being handed to you.

          11. Lorelei says:

            The reason not all your comments go through is because your content is generally pointless. I don’t think HG cares whether you are a narcissist, alien, pony, or reindeer. It’s the content of what I’ve seen posted that is attention seeking 100% of the time, challenging, etc. Post something intelligent and I assume it will go through. Posting dumb shit all the time isn’t winning any favors. Not all of my stuff goes through—but most does because it isn’t all pointless for other readers.

          12. HG Tudor says:

            Well stated Lorelei.

          13. Lorelei says:

            Who is an example of a greater cerebral narcissist?

          14. HG Tudor says:


          15. Lorelei says:

            I bet he is just great in the sack! I’m sure he is a real wizard!

          16. NarcAngel says:

            Vaknin. A legend in his own hand.

          17. HG Tudor says:


          18. Lorelei says:

            Perhaps well stated (about comments not going through) but it’s nice I can’t comment on a thread referencing me repeatedly that is copied and pasted with a link but having an opinion of it is not well stated. I’ll have to work on taking it up the ass a little better I suppose and state it a little more nicely!

          19. Mercy says:

            Makes sense

          20. Can you do an article simply posting emails from the mids who attempt to seduce you and those who make threats HG? It is rather amusing.

          21. HG Tudor says:

            Or i may use it in a book with analysis and explanation

          22. An even better idea!

          23. Lorelei says:

            These sorts of comments HG are really unusual to see posted here. I don’t like seeing threatening behavior insinuating physical threats. It’s just really weird. Even my ex isn’t stupid enough to act in such a manner.

          24. Violetta says:

            “I want you to picture yourself having a conversation like this with any other person in a public place, then me approaching your back cautiously and you don’t getting to hear me”

            I shall ignore all the grammatical mistakes in this little screed, and merely point out that if HG’s super-ultra-narc powers did NOT, for some reason, alert him to your presence, the person with whom he was speaking would undoubtedly say, “Hey HG, who’s that asshole trying to creep up behind you?”

          25. HG Tudor says:


          26. Mercy says:

            Violetta, Haha very good!

          27. Violetta says:

            You got there first!

          28. njfilly says:


            What makes you think Narcissus is a “she”? Or do you know that to be a fact? Just curious.

          29. Pati says:

            No njfilly, of course I dont know,i just guessed

          30. njfilly says:


            Why did you guess it was a woman? For some reason, I thought it was a man. I assume due to the physical threat.

          31. Pati says:

            Maybe your right njfilly,only HG knows. I hope you had a great Christmas !

          32. njfilly says:

            Mr. HG Tudor is all knowing.

            I hope you had a great Christmas as well!

          33. K says:

            njfilly and Pati
            These comments are about DARKEST CUPIDO, a.k.a. NARCISSUS. The first one is out of context, to read it in its entirety click on the link.

            DARKEST CUPIDO says:
            December 21, 2019 at 22:25

            Explain it to your readers Mr. Tudor.

            You will say: “He is a Mid Range who thinks he is a Greater”. Alright, anyway explain to your readers and me about my AWARENESS.

            FYC says:
            December 22, 2019 at 19:44
            Well HG, DC got one thing right, he is no genius. That is painfully obvious.

            HG Tudor says:
            December 22, 2019 at 19:51
            Painful for him.


          34. Pati says:

            What had creeper K , freaked me out!
            HG knows how to put him in his place.
            Thanks for sharing.

          35. K says:

            My pleasure Pati
            Does he ever! It’s always interesting to see the interaction between Greater and Midrange or Lesser.

          36. njfilly says:


            Thank you for the link. You are always very helpful.

            I have read the thread. Very interesting. The commenter certainly does a lot of complaining. Although I’m new at this I don’t think that would be the behavior of a greater. A clear “victim mentality”, which I can’t stand.

            I hope you had a nice Christmas!

          37. K says:

            My pleasure njfilly
            Christmas was wonderful, thank you, and how was yours? It is definitely not the behavior of a Greater.

            HG Tudor says:
            September 27, 2019 at 12:08
            All narcissists have a victim mentality however a Greater does not utilise it in the way that Lesser and especially Mid Range would.


          38. njfilly says:

            You are so resourceful!!

            My Christmas was very pleasant. Thank you for asking.

          39. K says:

            Thank you njfilly
            Practice makes perfect; I have to keep my Narchivist skills sharp. Here’s to looking forward to a New Year!

          40. njfilly says:

            Yes, Happy New Year.

          41. Mercy says:

            Njfilly, I automatically assumed male too because of the physical threat

          42. njfilly says:


            Whether male or female I think we can all agree that “it” is a “victim”. “It” makes me sick.

          43. Mercy says:

            “it” certainly does!

          44. narccissuss says:

            Mr. Tudor, no one is hidding here behind a new username. Indeed I used my username on my Email last time so you could recognize me. I prefer to call myself like this in these little but fun and interesting worlds because I share a lot of similarities with this historical greek character.

            So is that the end you picture? Why so aggressive Mr. Tudor?. Maybe I just grab your shoulders and tell the people you’re talking to: “Do you see this man that you are talking to? He is the greatest connoisseur of narcissism in the world, A true genius”. Jesus, how aggressive you are Mr. Tudor. I give you admiration for your work and you beat me up in return.

            Mr. Tudor, it is hilarious to me how you let me post these kind of comments here but then when I comment seriously about your work like any other reader then you don’t me let me post my opinion, after all, I’m nothing but another reader of your work like everyone else here and my intention is the same as the rest. Learn and share. You just discriminate against me because I am a Narcissist one. Seems like Mr. Tudor only post what suits him better.

            Mr. Tudor, it doesn’t matter if I’m a Greater or Mid Range because ultimately I’m a very bad rival in the face to face in every sense but of course I need freedom to express myself. It is very dirty to attack me and then tie my hands. Play fair Mr. Tudor.

          45. Witch says:

            narcissus are you trying to ask HG to be your sugar daddy or what???

          46. narccissuss says:

            Mr. Tudor, I can’t cope with this Lack of Freedom of Expression and Discrimination Against Me here, you post everyone’s comments except mine, you and your readers attack me and then you don’t even let me defend myself because you are not interesed in any debate or anything, you’re only interested in trying to humiliate the Narcissists that appear on your blog from time to time.unfairly since you don’t even let us express ourselves. Sorry but I don’t play anything with cheaters like you. I would say that this Blog insults my Sense of Entitlement but I am not even asking anything special from the rest.

          47. HG Tudor says:

            How do you know I post everyone’s comments but yours? You don’t. You don’t see the moderation pane, I do.

            I’ve no interest in humiliating anybody. It’s beneath me. You humiliate yourself with your comments.

            Nobody attacks you. They disagree with what you write.

            “I don’t play with cheaters”

            Cry me a river.

            Don’t like it? Don’t stay, nobody compels you to read or write.

          48. NarcAngel says:

            If he posts the comments of everyone but you, how am I reading and replying to your comment now, and what would we be attacking you about? Duh. Dunce cap for you.

            Waaa…You need your diaper changed Victor V Victim. You’re stinking up the place.

          49. Notme! says:


            You would say it ‘insults your sense of entitlement’? No need to sweetie, your comments drip nauseatingly with that sentiment. So we read between the lines

          50. Witch says:

            I actually found your comment amusing because it sounded like the start of a “when narcissists collide” fanfic erotica

          51. narccissuss says:

            Mr, Tudor, I’m not crying at all. I’m just asking you equality for me. I have no problem with people disagreeing with me, attacking me, or even trying to humiliate me at all, on the contrary, that is a lot of fun and a little bit of Negative Fuel and/or Challenge Fuel to me, but if you allow it then allow me to defend myself too. I’m not asking you anything special. I know you have rules here and I can respect them. I can behave, but if I don’t in some way, then you are entitled to do anything with my comments, even block me or ban me, this is your Blog. But my point is that I don’t think I have broken any rules yet, although nobody knows your rules only you do, unless of course my presence in this place breaks some of your rules. That is why, the question is very simple: Can I comment here on your Blog like anyone else without any disadvantage or especial rule for me? Yes or No? It’s that easy Mr. Tudor. No need to make any drama of this.

          52. Mercy says:

            Question for you HG,

            Does narccissuss think he’s only pretending to be a narcissist (unaware), but in reality IS a narcissist? Only he’s playing a greater which is inaccurate.

            I hope that made sense

          53. HG Tudor says:

            Mid Range who believes is a Greater, therefore unaware as to what he actually is.

          54. Mercy says:

            I’m sorry HG, I’m still confused. Mid Range who knows he is a narcissist just unaware that he is a mid, not a greater?

          55. HG Tudor says:

            He does not know what he is.

          56. Mercy says:

            Ok thank you

          57. BL says:

            I sort of feel like implying you are going to sneak up behind someone and attack them should be considered against the rules.

          58. HG Tudor says:

            Or an exhibition of grandiosity

          59. K says:

            The rules are located at the top under Formal Info, here’s the link.


          60. Violetta says:


            Fuckwit Friday followed by Slowbrained Saturday, Simpleminded Sunday, and presumably, Muppet Monday.

            Maybe I’m not empathic enough, HG. I never really thought about all the bizarre messages you must constantly receive.

            And I thought we were weird for contemplating making bratwurst out of Rudolph.

            Note to Nerdcissus: Greaters don’t whine.

          61. Mercy says:

            Violetta, I’m feeling slowbrained Saturday. I’m still trying to figure out if the whiny guy knows he’s a narcissist. Mid don’t know yet he’s playing a narcissist.

          62. FYC says:

            I would venture to guess that someone in “it’s” life told it that they are a narcissist. It then googled narcissist and found HG. It idolizes HG and wants what he has. “It” perceives narcissism as a good/superior thing and due to grandiosity/deluded ego, believes it is an aware greater. Yet for all of it’s protestations of lack of equal treatment, it keeps posting successfully and yet uses these opportunities to repeatedly dole out pity plays and pathetic attempts to demonstrate a ‘power’ that never existed and never will.

          63. HG Tudor says:


          64. Mercy says:

            Thank you. The attempts at demonstrating power are laughable. A greater wouldn’t need to leech on to another person’s blog in order to gain fuel.

          65. FYC says:

            Indeed, Mercy! And as another point of humor, it confesses it primarily uses silent treatments (MRN hallmark) and all of its comments contain pity plays.

          66. narccissuss says:

            Mr. Tudor, it seems that you are having difficulties explaining my “phenomenon” to your readers since you just gave her an inaccurate and vage answer. Fuel is Fuel for all Narcissists. It is the same for every Narcissist. It is an emotional reaction caused by an action of mine. For example: I provoke you by calling you horrible names, and you insult me back,
            that is Fuel for me, maybe Negative or Challenge Fuel, depending on the nature of your insult and/or reaction. Of course you can wound me if ignore me instead of reacting to my insults, but that is another topic. It’s that simple for Lessers, Mid Ranges and Greaters.

          67. HG Tudor says:

            You’ve read my books. Well done.

          68. Mercy says:

            Narccissuss, it was not inaccurate and vague (note you spelled vague wrong). It was a direct and accurate response. HG doesn’t have to be wordy in his answers because further explanation is in his articles, books, vids and consultations.

          69. Violetta says:

            Mercy: if I understand correctly, the qualities he thinks make him a narc–Machiavellianism, manipulation, deceptive charm–are lacking. This character couldn’t manipulate his way out of a wet paper bag with a road map and a native guide.

            The pity plays, defensive attitude, and near-palpable jealousy exhibited by this specimen are mid-range signs he doesn’t see.


            Basically, he’s a hyena looking at a tiger and saying, “Hey, we’re both wildlife!”

          70. HG Tudor says:


          71. Mercy says:

            Thank you Violetta, that link was very helpful. HGs example about a MRN in middle management having a moment of clarity that he is not rising to the top, then resorting to pity plays clears it up.

            I agree, his manipulation is very transparent. I wasn’t confused about him being a MRN, that much is obvious, it was the awareness I was struggling with.

          72. NarcAngel says:

            Haha. Hyena is too much credit though, as they can be dangerous. The only pain this one can inflict is on your eyes with it’s spelling.

          73. Lorelei says:

            Excellent analogy Violetta. I propose that a very well-instructed empath/weaponized and well-schooled can be quite a bit more “dangerous” than a random mid-ranger such as the example here on this thread. When it counts. Who is the hyena and who is the tiger? What is dangerous? This can get quite philosophical indeed.

          74. Notme! says:

            It’s useful to see the range within MMRN. I’m not likely to say much positive about my Ex but even he would make this fella look like an amateur. Is that because he’s different cadre? He was a somatic and better educated

          75. WhoCares says:


            “It’s useful to see the range within MMRN”
            I agree with this statement…my interest was piqued when I read of a mid-ranger who thinks s/he is a Greater.
            Truthfully, though, the belligerent Lessers who show up here are more entertaining.

          76. Mercy says:

            WhoCares, Haha I was thinking the same thing!!

          77. WhoCares says:

            Mercy – hehe, my expectations that this might be a good ‘case study’ were *so* not met.

          78. Mercy says:

            WhoCares, I was hoping for a good “narc hit” to take the edge off. I’m having withdrawals!

          79. Desirée says:

            I see christmas has left you with a near-fatal fuel shortage…the situation is a dire one indeed…can you hear howling in the distance? Are the fences trembling…or is that just your hands?

          80. Lorelei says:

            Desirée—I thought of you this morning and HG may not push this through but White House Black Market is dreamy right now.

          81. narccissuss says:

            “You’ve read my books. Well done.” Hahaha. Mr Tudor, I have never denied that almost everything I know about Narcissism I have learned from your work, but I don’t agree with your statement: “He does not know what he is” because I’m not saying: “I’m a Greater Narcissist”. But instead I’m saying: “I’m an aware Narcissist”. And your point is: “You are not aware because you think you are much more superior than what you actually are”. I understand your point and I even accept it because I am aware that I “suffer” from grandiosity. But that is not my point Mr. Tudor, my ACTUAL point here is: “I am aware of my Narcissism, I am aware that I have NPD, I’m a Narcissist”. That is the awareness that I am talking about:

            – I don’t love anyone
            – I have no Emotional Empathy
            – I only feel Negative Feelings, a Power Sensation and a big Emptyness inside of me.
            – I only see in white and black.
            – I have fantasies of unlimited power and beauty
            – I manipulate people
            – I need Fuel (Narcissistic Supply)
            – I enjoy people’s reactions
            – I abuse and exploit the people around me
            – ETC. (I’m aware of everything that makes me a Narcissist)

            Is fake all this awareness Mr. Tudor? Of course it is not. And it is ridiculous to say that all this awareness is fake because I’m a actual Narcissist.

            It feels like I were a Cobra and you are telling me all the time: “You are not an anaconda”. Alright, I have never stated that I am an Anaconda here, What I’m really stating here is that I’m a snake, and I have my own Tricks XD.

            I think I have explained myself perfectly this time.

          82. WokeAF says:

            HG, pls do tell ; Was NARCISSUS a LMR, victim cadre ?

          83. K says:

            NARCISSUS, a.k.a. DARKEST CUPIDO.

            evilmuskhat says:
            December 21, 2019 at 20:59
            What is DARKEST CUPIDO an example of?

            HG Tudor says:
            December 22, 2019 at 12:05
            A Mid Range Narcissist.


          84. WokeAF says:

            Sorry for out of context but speaking of spotting narc schools-gotta drop this somewhere-
            “Don’t Fk With Cats” on the ‘flix.
            Would love to hear what school and cadre the kitten killer is. (Luka Magnotta)

          85. Notme! says:


            Belligerent Lessers do sound like more fun, are they just more aggressive/abusive?

            The whiney, victim thing does nothing for me, other than make me roll my eyes.

            I was describing HG as terrifying on another thread and was thinking it’s the charm and cleverness (and voice) that I fell for in the past and it is that that terrifies me as my weakness.

            The really obvious pity plays turn my stomach, although I’ll own to falling for more subltle ones.

          86. Violetta says:


            I’m afraid I see more of myself than I like in that description. I do have a habit of surfing Rate My Professors to see how former classmates are doing, and feeling sorry for myself because “so-and-so got She-Who-Must off her Committee and graduated sooner into a better job market; it’s not fair!” or “what’s-her-name had She-Who-Must take herself off the Committee two weeks before the candidacy exam, so she never had to do all those endless rewrites while having her confidence destroyed,” blah blah.

            I’ve given up clicking there for Lent more than once. A friend said “that’s your porn.” He’s right: it’s addictive and it doesn’t really satisfy me. If the classroom bully gets good reviews, I wonder, “Why hasn’t anyone seen through that fraud?” If the classroom bully gets bad reviews, I fret, “how did that narrow-minded, sadistic Thought Police Officer get in a position to deprive hapless students of a real education and give them indoctrination instead?”

            My greatest reassurance that I’m not a mid-range myself is the fact that I have few illusions about my ability to charm people. I’m hoping that any interviews I manage to snag involve a teaching demo, because I know I come off better there than in an interview. I have a phone interview coming up in January, and I’m already worried I came across as too flaky when we had the initial conversation on the phone.

            One of the things I miss about NY is the fact that being kinda weird is no big deal. They draw a distinction between the dangerous psychos on the subway and the mostly harmless neurotics they deal with at work and in the neighborhood every day.

          87. Mercy says:

            Violetta, I’m confident that you will do well in your interview. Turn those negative thoughts around and give yourself some credit! I would never describe you as flaky. Flaky is unreliable and careless. I doubt you came across that way. As far as being kinda weird, I don’t see that as a negative either. Rather than weird, you could better describe yourself as interesting. Who wants to be boring and predictable? To me, those are the weird people.

            PS Stop watching porn! Be the porn star