Good God

I know a number of you have been curious as to what I look like so I thought it was high time I posted a picture so there you are. Just my little joke. I don’t have a beard. No, the question of spirituality is one that occasionally surfaces. I know of several of my kind who embed themselves in religious groups and congregations because there is a surfeit of care givers and do-gooders available to target. Not only are those who attend worship more likely to be empaths they are also beholden to a set of rules that exhorts them to behave in a thoroughly empathic manner. It is a double whammy of delicious goodness and evidently too good for some of my brethren to pass up.

Where does religion enter to elsewhere into our lives? I was asked recently whether I believed in God. I asked why and the questioner suggested (with fair reasoning I will admit) that she suspected that most narcissists are atheists. The reason for this is that we could not stand to believe that anything more powerful than ourselves exists. It is a good point and I know that it is an applicable one to some of my kind. But not me.

I attended church in my youth at the instruction of my parents. I found it tedious, although I did like the idea of having a pulpit and a captive audience. The history of organised religion interests me – now there were some master manipulators. I should imagine even I could learn something from the archbishops of yesteryear. I also attended a church school. I enjoyed school. It was where I first began to practise my craft and it also provided me the necessary interface with lots of different people, enabling me to study them and gauge their behaviours and reactions. You might regard this as being ahead of my time but I had a good teacher and of course daddy dearest was the headmaster as I have explained way back somewhere on this blog. I had no option to avoid religion. It flowed through the house and school and consequently my life. I was brought up to believe in God and complied with that, for the consequence of rejection was not one I wanted to suffer.

That explains my foundation in my belief but what of now? Has the passage of time and the progression of adulthood eradicated those beliefs? Not at all. If there was no God then how is it that I have been chosen to be as special as I am. Who else would lead and create and test. His power flows through me, I am his instrument and I am blessed with his power of judgement. He chooses many people to further his works and he invests each of them with a fraction of his might appertaining to different facets of his glorious being. The surgeons, nurses and charity workers are chosen to extend his tender caress across the world. The clergy are his mouthpiece, spreading the word and organising those that follow. The brilliant authors, artists, entertainers, inventors, sports stars and musicians have been blessed with an element of his almighty talent and power of creation and they are charged with bringing joy and enlightenment to the masses. For me, my role is to dispense with those who are not of his exacting standard, to challenge the impure, to test those who proclaim to be unblemished and loving and root out those that are the charlatans who do not deserve His perfect love. So yes, I believe in God for his power flows through me and I undertake his works.

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110 thoughts on “Good God”

  1. Interesting post. I find what you say here ambiguous. It can be interpreted in different ways.

    I read Confessions of a Narcissist last weekend and I really liked it. I found very funny the way you structured the book, with the greeting of your doctors first, you paraphrasing it and“showing the pair of fucking idiots” afterwards. LOL.

    I also read Sex and the narcissist, which made me feel a lot of repulsion.

    But in general I think that it takes courage to write the way you do, HG

      1. Thanks HG.
        My father also died in his late 50’s from a heart attack. He was alone in his house and the cleaning lady found him one or two days later. I was not surprised at all to learn about his death; I always thought he would die alone and early. He was an alcoholic and I know that contributed to his death. However, I am convinced that he also died from a “broken heart”.
        Do you think your father thought about divorcing your mother?
        I guess he was a traditional kind of man and he had already divorced a first wife, I think.

    1. Lou
      What specifically repulsed you about Sex and the Narcissist? Do you mean how sex is used to manipulate? The feeling of looking back after reading it? Just curious if you care to expand. I think its a must read for those in intimate relationships with a Narc but I see how it could be upsetting for some. Especially for those not ready to give ip the illusion that there was true intimacy (not meaning you).

      1. Hi Narc Angel,
        I also think Sex and the N is a must read for everyone that is or has been in an intimate relationship with a narcissist. Absolutely.
        It was while reading some parts of the book that I really felt disgusted. Reading about HG targeting virgins to dis flower them, or how he’d exploit his girlfriend ‘s sexual abuse as a young girl (the gardener) to get fuel.
        I am not a prude and am not condemning HG. I I know fuel is paramount for him.
        I am just being honest and saying the reaction I got from some passages of the book.
        But, in the end, what I felt the most after reading it was respect for HG’s honesty.

      1. Nunya biz
        Using sex as a weapon bothers me a lot too. No way I could ever accept it or excuse it. It sets off the homicidal thoughts in my head.
        If I was actually nearby I think they would overpower me,
        “I can take this .45 and blow his f…ing head off and he’ll never abuse anyone else….Maybe God put me here to witness this so I can take him out and make the world a safer place….”

      2. Thank you for your reply, WS.
        My problem is I enjoy D/s aspects of sex (me being s).
        So it’s hard for me to untangle somewhat since I think I am attracted to this dynamic quite a lot. There are other things I’ve liked in my life as well, so not exclusively that. But then I feel so sad to think that to another person this could be used as a control mechanism. For myself it is something, as someone commented somewhere on another post, that I’d consider role play. And of course as HG points out it can be binding, which for me it is, I feel closer to a person. The thought of them maintaining effortless distance is painful to contemplate, though I can see that it is sometimes true.
        Also, the other thing is withholding sex. HG did talk in a book about that, I think “Sex and the Narcissist”, that eventually it comes to withholding sex and that upset me because…well I think all my life I’ve been taught to believe, by the media and by societal views, that women do this. That it is wrong for women to withhold sex. Of course I’ve always felt consent is the most important key and the vast majority of sex I’ve had has not crossed that line, narcissist or no, but as I was forced to grow up as we all are I started to realize that things are not that simple. There are many psychological factors that go into a relationship that is sexually dysfunctional, sometimes including a man’s ability to be intimate and connected, sometimes as HG discussed, men can use sex as a weapon and withhold pleasure and a woman can suffer just as easily, paradoxically to what most people assume or ever discuss. I’ve always thought that in a way, but felt the perspective was not generally accepted. It makes me angry the idea that someone could throw something that is, for some, physically/psychologically/emotionally important in the face of another person and I get tired of the gender divide on this happens sometimes.

        And yes, of course, WS, non-consent. Another terrible aspect of things and I understand that awful objectification, it is impossible to forgive.

        Sorry, long, just some of my rambling thoughts.

  2. I don’t want to offend, but in light of recent headlines regarding Priests and little boys… any chance priesthood and nunhood would be a good niche for a narcissist? Or a whole pack of them?

    I’m not hearing a lot of repentance about the allegations of molestation, just coverups, which might mean they don’t think it was wrong, which sounds very narcissistic.

    Or is it possible for someone Normal (not empath) in that position to commit crimes in a sanctuary, before God, and have no conscience or guilt?

    I don’t know a lot about Catholicism outside of a Bing Crosby movie, but I like the Pope, and I’m completely stunned by the accusations of abuse, and the lack of heart in dealing with it.

    There absolutely are slithery Protestant preachers that have been guilty of greed and money schemes and adultery, not about God at all. The Bible warns about them.

    But these other allegations are aggregious and just evil.

      1. Sometimes I think out loud, and I apologize if my question has offended anyone as I know religion is sensitive to us all, upsetting anyone was not my intention.

    1. Kelly
      Well this is just my opinion, but I have a hard time believing a normal person could do such hurtful things to children. They’d have to have some sickness of the mind. Seems to me that the more likely answer is narcissism, then the lack of empathy and concern for the effects in the children would be explained

    2. Kelly
      Youre stunned? Its been going on since Christ was a cowboy. In fact Brokeback Bishopry is likely the most popular viewing/tutorial in most diocese.

      1. Hi NarcAngel

        I’m stunned it’s still being swept under the rug. And no, I didn’t grow up in that world. These men were so brave to came forward to tell the truth. Is everyone really too afraid to stand up to a bunch of narcissists posing as good guys? No man is superior to another. I pray directly to God, I don’t ask forgiveness from a child molester. Who’s scarier- the leaders or their ever submissive followers?

  3. HG, do you really think this of us (empaths/your targets) just because our fuel became stale? I’m sure the targets gave it their all.

    “…For me, my role is to dispense with those who are not of his exacting standard, to challenge the impure, to test those who proclaim to be unblemished and loving and root out those that are the charlatans who do not deserve His perfect love…”

  4. This reminds me of a documentary i watched this past weekend on watren jeffs the flds(mormon sect) leader. His dad rulon put him in charge as a so called profit. His brother wallace was the one in the documentary recounting his childhood with warren. Warren was most definitely a golden child narcissist he could so no wrong and abused this power. He had molested children and was marrying underage girls to older men. Very disgusting. The power of brainwashing and conditioning tho….he still is ruling from his prison. These people still idolyze him and think hes a god all in the name of religion.
    It was a very good example of a narcissist in the making. He used a lot of the tactics discussed in these blogs to control his people.

  5. However, with all undue respect, I do appreciate the fact that Mister Tudor does give us a voice through this blog. Due to my having being on this blog at the time of my heartbreak from ex-Narc boyfriend, I was able to voice my pain, and it did help me to heal. And, in the time I was able to voice my pain, and opinions on here, my memories of ex-Narc boyfriend actually faded, and I rarely remember him, anymore; now, he is just a generic “incident” of a very bad time in my life, as were the other two I was with.

  6. Thank you, SS. It just makes me feel sad to know what you and others have gone through because I have been through it, too, and it’s very terrible abuse to inflict on another person, especially when all you ever wanted to do was to love that person. That love was used, exploited, taken advantage of, and made into a game, solely for the Narcissist’s entertainment purposes- (or, need for fuel… whichever…whatever…but, it still hurts, no matter the reason, to take someone’s genuine love like they do, crushing it, grinding it, and destroying it slowly, but wholly). It is right for Mister HG to call this site EVIL.
    Claudia

  7. Thank you for replying to me ICU .

    I understand why some people believe in all things good as in ” GOD” & If it helps the healing process after abuse for some people then I’m fine with that, however my understanding is that Ncs & sociopaths can’t change which is why they keep repeating their actions in every relationship they have . The end result always being the same as the last .

    My pre narc life was ticking along pretty nicely before he arrived on the scene & took it all from me . Did he make a choice to take it through free will ? Yes, because I had everything that he didn’t .

    Thank you again for your kind words I appreciate it very much but sadly they won’t change my thoughts .

    Take care Claudia .

    NSS … x

    1. You are welcome, So Sad. I am so sorry for everything you, and everybody else here, has gone through. This life hurts, brutally.

      Claudia xxx

      1. Thank you again Claudia .

        Please don’t feel that you need to say sorry for what happened to me or anyone else . It happened through no fault of our own . x

  8. God is Love. You do not know love. Even though you know the difference between right and wrong, you choose to do wrong over right. The One God died, as the Christ, so that all men might live; but you injure and kill others (in more ways than one), so that one man might live- you. You dress yourself in light, but are purposefully evil. Even a psychopath, who doesn’t know the difference between right and wrong, is more righteous than you, a Sociopath who does know the difference, but choose to continue to do wrong and hurt others. One day even you, Mr. Tudor, will bow down to Jesus Christ and your mouth will confess him as The Lord. You will, then, fully be aware of what it feels like to have regret, a conscience, and remorse. I believe that this will be your eternal fire to suffer in having no more fuel, and not only facing your own “Beast” head-on, but seeing it fully, and living with it personally for all of eternity. Of course, this is your choice, not God’s.

    1. If there is a ” god ” as you say ICU WHY would he let us be subjected to violence , manipulation and abuse ?
      I’m not doubting your faith but at the same time narcs will do what they want because they always have & will .

      No amount of praying will ever change that .

      1. We live in a fallen world. I do not have all the answers, but some day we all will understand 🙂 The Narc and Sociopaths do not change because they don’t want to change. The Lord gives us a Free Will and this is what we all want- a Free Will. In our Free Will, we make good and bad choices. Those choices cause havoc on not only ourselves, but others as well. Still, we want our own Free Will. The Lord does not put us on strings like a marionette because The Lord is not a Narcissist. He lets us all make our own choices, and this is what we want. As far as children and animals suffering, I do not have the answer for this. But, I trust in The Lord that His Ways and Understanding our so much more than I could even begin to comprehend. I wish I did have the answers. But, I do know that He is Good. All good things come from Him. I liked your questions, So Sad; they are good ones, and ones that we all do ask. One day, we will know. Yes, I feel devastated when I think about those who suffer. But, just because we live in a world of suffering doesn’t give the Sociopath a “license” to do his/her part in choosing to add to the suffering and despair of the world.

        Claudia

    1. Lol nothing that involves a pole and tips… ☺Though no judgement to those who do.
      From reading Mr. Tudor’s Sex and the Narcissist, I’ve learned that environment is filled with narcs. That was surprising given that they have to pay for attention.
      I do mostly Latin dance.

      1. Good for you Love!!! I bet you are very talented.
        A strip club was on her future list. Who knows what her plans were for me there. Lol

      2. Thank you Snow 😊. She probably wanted to get a lap dance for the 2 of you. Basically put on a show for her. Its the R-rated version of a 3some.

  9. GOD, my favorite sibject.
    It is funny how “much” we know about god and stll behave (inversely)
    😈😇😈
    After all who has told us that god is only good? Whay not both, good and bad? We have FREE WILL to think what we want. GOD does not care how we behave or what we think, but some people can not except that.I will use god until I have benefit from it.Whay not?
    HG, peace

  10. I think the narc bachelor would be a marvelous idea. I personally portray strong bipolar traits which I am well aware of sadly for my husband he was married to a narcissistic psychopath before me so I have a hard time biting my tongue because of my temper not to feed fuel to the narc since there is a custody agreement with kids involved. Could you just imagine the mix of the two on a reality tv show? Bc I know I’m competitive at times…and the narc of course does no wrong…..🤔🤔🤔

    1. Me too, regarding bipolar. I don’t like to discuss it much usually.
      *sigh*
      Planning to make a call or two today for some treatment support plan or another to help with some progress.

    2. Also, btw, yeah husband.
      I have had a hard time getting through to him enough so that we could heal some things. I’d for awhile thought he might be asperger’s and then narcissistic, but I’m changing my mind. Actually discussing all of the stuff on here has helped him immeasurably. He’s altered some of his behaviors and understands better lately what some of my fight or flight triggers are and we are both pretty certain he was raised by a narcissistic sociopath, though he is not biologically related, so it’s an odd situation. He was taught some unhealthy, narcissistic worldviews that he was absolutely stubborn in forever, unbudging. I’m not sure if it’s cognitive empathy he’s gained, but regardless it’s been a bit lighter.

  11. DN manipulated me with “God” several times in many different ways. Don’t really like the word or religion in general bc I grew up with some pretty hypocritical people who used religion as their mask and justification. I do believe in faith though. I’ve seen and felt too many things that cant be logically or scientifically explained. To me there is a higher power, a life force, or even a parallel universe that guides us. Even if its bullshit…its not hurting me, judging me, or taking my money in the name of the LORD!

    Always loved the Bible stories too!

  12. Hello HG Tudor
    I am a devout Roman Catholic God comes first in my life.

    Good to see that you have a sense of humour your writing made me laugh.

    Some people have a God complex lol

    Yes the Lord has you in the palm of his hand and has great plans for you
    Jeremiah 29:11
    His merciful love and justice can heal you and achieve the impossible He loves you unconditionally and can fill an emptiness and void no human can

    You are His instrument as a force for good, to empower and educate targets and maybe save future targets.

    The Lord has given you a gift to communicate and you do communicate well and in detail

    God Bless you Praying for you

    Pax Vobiscum †

    1. Ave Maria, I’ve been waiting for you on this post! Good to see you!
      I love this blog! I’m addicted like I’m addicted to the show True Blood. So many commonalities.
      Mr. Tudor, ever consider a reality show? It would be the biggest hit on tv.
      How about the Narc Bachelor? You would set up with a variety of ladies: empaths, codependents, bipolars, histrionics, less/mid/great narcs, norms, etc.
      Oh boy, I can hardly wait.
      Btw, why am I in time-out? Was my last post too naughty? My apologies if so. 😘

      1. Now there’s an idea Love. You are not in time-out, I have a lot of posts to moderate at present, I will get to yours and everybody else’s presently.

      2. Yay! Thank you. You work too hard Mr. Tudor and hardly sleep. 🍎❤🍎
        But I understand … After all it only took you 6 days to create it all.
        Hope you do rest on the 7th days.

      3. Hi Love,
        This blog and True Blood!!!!!!
        Things that make me happy ❤️🍎😃
        Thanks for reminding me

      4. Hi Snow. Sadly, I’m near the end of the True Blood series. 😢
        It will be a rough time for me. During these coming dark days, I will need some major blog drama.
        ******CALLING ALL LADIES AND GENTS*****
        I will need to see you on your baddest behavior! No holds barred. Cat fights, screaming, biting, you name it! 😈😡👿
        Thanks in advance. ❤

      5. I hate it when the series comes to the end. It must be part of the addictive behavior that I’m realizing I have. I get so attached to the characters and so invested in who they end up with and what happens to them. I always want true love to win. I’m such a love devotee as HG always points out to us. ❤️
        You will definitely need to be distracted by something else. 😉😉

      6. I am too Snow! I am an addict for love, or what I imagine is love. Its definitely not good for me to distract myself with something else, because that would mean taking a little walk over to Narcville. Lol I’ve exiled myself from that land. The good thing is I’m a dancer (outside of my profession). Its my true passion and it keeps me out of trouble.

  13. The Narc I was involved with tried the victimization through religion with me, but I did not buy it. I knew to much at that point. HG quick question: if a mid-range Narc has been called out by one of his appliances (not exposed, just called out privately on his narcissism and need for fuel), is he still apt to Hoover at a later time? Wouldn’t he risk injury again in doing so?

    1. Yes he would risk being wounded SW owing to the increased knowledge of the victim. The bar for the Hoover Execution criteria will have been raised higher meaning he would be more likely to go elsewhere rather than hoover this particular victim. He would only do so if he had a clear shot (if you will) and there was considerable fuel on offer which he felt he could achieve, despite the risk of potentially being wounded. On balance, most MRs would go elsewhere.

      1. Actually I’m not always so serious at all. Yes I like to dance. I don’t have any guilty pleasures, I don’t do guilt.

      2. I don’t find that to be fair that you don’t feel guilt!!! So what do you LIKE to do that is pleasurable then?

  14. The narc also was an atheist.

    And *Highly* critical of anyone who didn’t agree with his politics or views. It never stopped.

    Being there was like living in a vacuum. No air!

    I really didn’t belong with an atheis, was depressing!

    1. You were with a NARC, being Atheist has nothing to do with it. I do not believe in GOD but I do not care if anyone else does but I am curious of how they can. I felt it kept me from growing intellectually. I rejected the teaching since I was five years old. Yes I also had to endure years of attending church with my best friend. But it was the end result of the roast beef dinner at my friends house. Oh and the life savors her mom gave us when we started getting antsy during service.

      Look how science was put on hold because of religion. Duh! >

  15. I am Christian and believe in God but I had been wondering if a narcissist could truly believe in God and be saved when they portray no higher power than themselves. The one I deal with would argue with God if he was standing right in her face ,but she will gladly show up at a church a couple times a year and even attempt to sing a song up on the stage for a pat on the back but yet erase the fact she danced on a pole the night before in a trashy bar for the same attention and adoration…she’s a lesser so she is just full of spur of the moment acts and she just plays whatever role benefits her for the moment. Her interest always appear to match up perfectly to her primary fuel source.

    1. Hello KD, the answer lies in the use of the word “truly”. The person you describe exhibits the contradictory behaviour for which we are well known and the slavish devotion to the end always justifying the means.

    2. “The one I deal with would argue with God if he was standing right in her face” – I sincerely take this as a compliment…I’m being dead serious. For a sliver of a second I thought I felt a twang of some anger infused emotion of — can’t place it, but please don’t forget, I’m not the one who put you on research duty…sooooo don’t take it out on moi…let’s see, what I can I do to help your job go faster…

      1. I never sang in church and I do not like organized religion or attend church but it doesn’t affect my beliefs

      2. I prefer Irish pub/sports bars where I can talk

      3. Can’t dance no rhythm – it gets better with a buzz – never danced on a pole – gross + it would be dangerous…you wouldn’t want me to perish would you? Oh you would would you! Shame shame!

      Hardest task of my life: Stepparenting. It’s a love hate. I would die for them in a heartbeat, but living with them is not as easy!

      Do ask if you need more!!!

      1. Oh yea, Kd, some crucial elements that construct me down to fundamentals for your behalf on research (hey man – I’m TRYING to help you LEARN ME – your cruel bosses keep you slaving and I’m JEDING you – ok not working so here goes: – you still owe me) Natural redhead. Half Jewish by lineage.

        Wait, I’ll cut you a deal – I’ll tell you ANYTHING you want to know for ten minutes – cut me in for half! Let’s not waste time. I hate wasting time. I value time over money – money never mattered much to me…rebelled from Jewishness.

        Love husband because he does not agree with me. Hate husband because he does not agree with me. Love stepkids. Hate being a stepmother. No kids. 4 Yorkies – never again!

        Does NO ONE engage in direct conversation EVER!? Such a laborious process – I seek to cut work efficiency but suit yourselves!

  16. My ex told me he was god.your writing has been quite a shock.i have been in disbelief.i know you hear many stories.i am still fighting for survival.he wants me back or dead.preferably dead.i was committed to love him and look after him-loyal and Faithfull since 14 yrs old.i set out to prove true love exists.he jilted me at 20-then 27 years I waited-Faithfull and loving.he was narcissistic psychopathic and alcoholic.i lost my friends-family -house -buisness -health-mental and physical and I’m still struggling after 3 yrs apart.but somewhere I still manage to smile and shine some of the time.i thank you for your insight.but why?What was it that moved you to ‘come out’ and help us lost souls??? That’s the huge question?I truly thought his grandchild would change him -or near death-even his son comiting suicide-he just used it to get more sex and damage more people.when I near died of my injuries and still loved him….Another woman killed herself-he said she was nothing.i will keep reading when I can.i thank you.i still need help with my torture -I am looking for your books- can’t do ebooks.no phn or broadband.i am a beautiful and loving soul and I keep shining it out when I can.xx

    On 18 Oct 2016 11:01 p.m., “Knowing the Narcissist” wrote:

    HG Tudor posted: ” I know a number of you have been curious as to what I look like so I thought it was high time I posted a picture so there you are. Just my little joke. I don’t have a beard. No, the question of spirituality is one that occasionally surfaces. I know of se”

    1. Hello AMA, thank you for your post. I was not moved to help, but rather it came as a consequence of my own mandatory treatment and my enjoyment of writing. However, I do recognise that a side effect of my work is that it is providing people with tremendous insight, understanding and help and thus I reap the benefit of their gratitude in that regard. If you are unable to do e-books you can find obtain some of my work in paperback form here
      https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=sr_nr_p_n_feature_browse-b_mrr_0?fst=as%3Aoff&rh=n%3A283155%2Cp_27%3AH+G+Tudor%2Cp_n_feature_browse-bin%3A2656022011&bbn=283155&sort=relevancerank&ie=UTF8&qid=1476891882&rnid=618072011

  17. I just completed reading this new entry of your blog. Do you believe in a GOD? I am sure you made a few on here happy with your admission of believing in a make believe friend.
    On the other hand, I am disappointed. I thought of you being more evolved. My bad for thinking that an extensive vocabulary equals intellect. You are not a free thinker.

    I am in need of ones from a Scandinavia country. They are apt to be irreligion.

    1. Your bad for asking a question to which you already know the answer. Your double bad for failing to notice my answer to the question of belief posed by another poster. Just goes to show that intolerance really does cause the omission of facts.

      1. So punish me then. I will pay attention next time, but the problem is I do not have the time to read all of the posts.
        In my hand, I have an apple. It is shiny and red. It is crisp and a bit tart. You know the one.

    2. My views on religion are similar to HG’s. I too was forced to go to church as a child and though I found it boring and hypocritical, I enjoyed the stories that exposed God’s machinations.

      I always hated confession, thought it was always fun to be lascivious just to garner a reaction. I remember leaving the priest speechless once when I was small because he gave me my penance after confession and my response was, “Who are you to try and tell me what I need to say or do to receive forgiveness. You’ve forgotten you are a sinner too. You’ve forgotten that you are not God.”

      God is the poster child for narcissism. He created me in his image so that must mean he understands and sees some value to my being the way I am.

      1. My question is to both HG and B_E. How do you believe in one entity you do not see or have one once of proof of really, and science seems to disprove it more each day? Wouldn’t you take the credit of being all that you see yourself as and accept the thought that there is no GOD so you are really everything. To believe in GOD makes someone more then both of you. Hmm I find this to be interesting concept and perhaps a crack in your construct.

        Hell I have this belief of nothing above me and I am not claiming to be a narcissist. I just am and so I shall be. >

      2. Where did I say I believed in one entity?
        Once again, if the situation demands it, I will believe. If it does not, I will not.

      3. And I said he was a master manipulator not that I bowed down and worshipped at his altar or anyone else’s.

        My last comment was meant to be sarcastic in regard to the constant rhetoric that we are made in his image. If that is the case then my point that god is a narc or maybe even a psychopath is proved.

        Mostly I find it to be all a bunch of hypocritical nonsense. The church is haven for narcs and sadists.

        But like I said I enjoy the stories of god’s wrath and how he smites those who unleash it.

        I know who created me.

      4. B_E…I don’t understand how God would be the poster child for narcissism…Satan represents self – God others as evidenced by the sacrifice of His Son, Jesus…I think? I would agree that both God and Satan perhaps started the development of the self, but that God and Satan diverged in the fundamental feed where Satan fed self out of fear of nothingness and God fed others out of love of nothingness. Do you disagree?

      5. God created Satan. It was all part of the master plan.

        God demands unrelenting faith and devotion. He demands that his followers worship him above all else. He demands faith, love and devotion without question. To question god is a sin.

        He makes decisions and no one is allowed to question him. You`re told to fear is wrath and his fury.

        If you do question him, or worship another entity, or go against the rules he has established for all of mankind, you`re a sinner and you need to get down on your hands and knees and beg for mercy and forgiveness for your treachery.

        He may forgive you and give you another chance to prove you are worthy of his love, affection and attention. Or, he may smite you and find a reason to make you pay for your sins for the rest of your miserable life.

        When his wrath is ignited, he unleashes his fury in the form of floods that wipe out nearly all of mankind; disease; war; famine; the list goes on.

        Satan wasn`t afraid of anything. He was jealous because god created humans and was more in love with them than his most revered, trusted, and respected angels. Satan rebelled out of jealousy and hatred for mankind. God loved and admired mankind (because he created them IN HIS IMAGE no less) with the same love and admiration he once reserved for the angels.

        God purposely set the ones he claims to love and adore so much up for failure as part of his master plan and then decided to make them spend the rest of their lives begging for forgiveness for a sin they were coerced into committing in the first place.

        Fucking brilliant if you ask me.

  18. Dragoncreeper that same sentence hit me as well, but not for it’s comparison but for the fact I’m pretty sure I failed the test I was raised in a charasmatic church and thinking back, it was one of the subjects the Narc and I discussed during the golden period. Now I know that was probably the bullseye on my forehead. I may have failed ‘that’ test, but I also have forgiveness from my God and know that ultimately if the Narc was indeed sent into my life to test my faith, it is only stronger now than before. I won’t be making those mistakes anymore.

    1. Seeking Wisdom do not beat yourself up over it, they are masters. I told my exN that I do not believe in your God but I believe there is a higher being. I do not mean to put anyones religion down I just cannot follow any book that has been tainted by man. I believe in love, compassion and being humble. My exN said he believed in the same even though he was raised Catholic and his mother is very religious. That turned out to be either a lie or just another thing for him to use against me. He would constantly tell me things happen to me because I didn’t believe. He claims he prays all of the time and that’s why God grants him what he wants. I’m just amazed at many of the lies I believed. :/

  19. I hope you do not have a mustache also…

    I have to admit, this sentence bothers me a little,
    “For me, my role is to dispense with those who are not of his exacting standard, to challenge the impure, to test those who proclaim to be unblemished and loving and root out those that are the charlatans who do not deserve His perfect love.”.

    You do realize that this statement is very close to some very notorious serial killers/killers who thought they were doing Gods work, ridding the false profits (or followers) from their proximity:

    Son of Sam (David Berkowitz)
    Yorkshire Ripper (Peter)
    John List (killed his own family)
    AND lots more…. even lessers….

      1. Sounds like a “play list” song. I don’t think any woman he will engage with is simple. >

      2. True… I guess the complexity of the girl will make more fun for him…
        Oh I have tons of “play list” songs BUT I believe that most of them can have dual meanings. I think your mind is just in the gutter my dear AH OH! 😉

      3. Perhaps Dragoncreeper, we should explore this mind in the gutter complex I seem to have. OX >

      4. Ah Oh… You make me go Oh Ah when you call me by my full name! <3 I do love the gutter complex… I do live there most of the time…come let me show you… Purrrrrr

  20. Well thanks for the picture. Everything is as I pictured it minus all the hair. You in the clouds looking down at us. Lol..
    That was brilliant and amusing.
    I grew up in a Catholic Church and got married there. I had always believed in God and loved hearing all of his stories. I am very interested in other people religions also.
    Everything is different for me now after the experience with my ex including religion.
    My husband continually talks about a higher power and wanting me to attend
    Al-anon. I am not sure about them now.
    I have recently found out that the pastors at my church have been having affairs and one of the elders there was interested in propositioning me for a threesome. Incredible to me. They are all charming and I now recognize them as narcissists. I find it hard to trust anyone who wants to teach and preach the words of God and then can be this dishonest and evil. I can’t help but wonder what everyone wants to fill my head with. I think everyone has there own cult and wants me in it.
    I can’t trust anyone anymore. This is just another result of having been entangled with one of your kind.
    I do still believe in God, just not the others.

  21. Interesting read. Religion was an area that was practiced every week growing up. I come from a long line of catholic masses and schools, 3 generations back.
    I have a different view. I have learned over the many years that religion was a very large front to hide what was happening in the home. Who would ever expect such evil in a very religious house?

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