The Pursuit Of Revenge
I know you hate me. Your kind are filled with love and then filled with hate. There is no need to deny it. It is a normal reaction for someone like you and one which I entirely endorse and encourage. I know you will try and mask that burning anger that you feel by saying you pity me or that you have nothing but contempt for me but I can see it. Those sensational eyes of yours that once blazed with desire, passion and most of all hope, are now filled with the churning, billowing flames of hatred. Some of you will fight to contain this sensation. You fear that by giving in to this hatred that you will somehow be on a level with me. I can ease your fears in that regard. You are nowhere near my level and nor were you. I placed you far higher than me to begin with. Yes it was artificial and all part of my design but you had no complaint then did you? You did not object or demur when I thrust you skywards and planted you no that pedestal. Of course you did not. Who would? Nobody would and least of all somebody like you. Now you are on your true level, way down below me, cast onto stony ground, broken and shattered. Amazing though isn’t it how you managed to summon such an anger from somewhere. How many times had you said to your confidantes that you felt numb (yes they were reporting back to me). Yet now look at you. A seething, glowering fireball of hatred and it is all directed at me. I adore this.
You want to destroy me. I know you do. You all do. The one before you was exactly the same as the one before was and the one before her. The next one will be just the same,although I do still hold out some hope that she might just be different and somehow avoid the mistakes all those who have gone before have made. I have seen this hatred many times and your desire for revenge is strong. Of course it is. I made it this way. Everything I did as I brought you down low was programmed to cause you to eventually explode into hatred. From elation to despair, through broken to numb. Eventually the switch would be flicked and as puppet master I ignite the fire beneath you which stokes the flames of hatred. Despise me, go on, do it. Send those wicked words towards me. Tell me what a bastard I am. Keep it coming. Pull you hair, wave your fist and stamp your feet. Tell me how you are going to scratch my car. Feels good does it not? Believe me, it feels even better being on the receiving end of your bile and hate. Go on, sit with your friends and plot your revenge, I can feel you all huddled around your cauldron as you try and concoct ways at getting back at me. I feel so powerful knowing you are focussed on seeking retribution. This is what I want. I want to bask in the heat of your anger, I want to be covered in the disgust and distaste that you will spew towards me. I want you scheming, hatching and planning. By hurting you do deeply I plant inside you that overwhelming desire to get even with me. It happens every time and is all part of my master plan to ensure you, my beautiful appliance keep pouring fuel in my direction. I make you seek revenge for in doing so, your planning and ham-fisted execution of the same give me what I want. Fuel. You are blinded with your hatred so that you fail to realise you will not succeed in gaining revenge, not by shouting, spitting and scratching. Oh no, this overload of howling anger is just a banshee of fuel to me. I will twist and shift as I thwart your attempts, laughing at your pathetic efforts to try and get one over on me. This will spur you on as I lead you on yet another merry dance as I continue to take from you exactly what I need. So please, seek your revenge. You will not get it but I will be delighted seeing you try.
76 thoughts on “The Pursuit Of Revenge”
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I pretend to be building a life where he is not in my thoughts, but the reality is that I desire revenge with all my heart. I’m trying to move on, thinking that building a new life is more important than destroy his, that I can get my revenge when I will be old and near to death, so to not spend my entire life thinking of him. Well, I cannot control these thoughts and every night, when I am in bed and think how would be delightful to kill him, I feel as I loose, over and over again. I’m seriously thinking about getting my hippocampus removed to have no memories at all, and literally living in the moment.
Um Yaaa, I’m gonna make him cry, then I’ll be done.
Dear Mr Tudor,
I just had coffee with my girlfriends and the weasel’s name came up, (not by me)
My girlfriend mentioned she sees the weasel in our local shopping complex and said ” he always looks so mad, but then again, he is old ”
I laughed
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Satisfying although I expect that you did not linger with this conversation about him in order to maintain total no contact.
Dear Mr Tudor,
You should know me better than that ….. I have way more important topics to talk about than the Weasel …. 🤢 … my girlfriends can’t stand him, in fact, no one I know likes him ….haha
It took as long for her to utter those few words and me to laugh …not a nano second more was wasted
He’s just an educational topic here … nothing more
The very first time you said to me … go no contact … I obeyed and have never looked back
Best advice ever
Thank you teacher
🍎
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Gtd.
I’ve never wanted revenge either, but I don’t really know why. It used to worry me that I didn’t feel the rage that some people here say they felt. Intellectually I could see it being a useful step on the road to healing and acceptance, so it did concern me there was a sort of absence of feeling where I felt rage should be. Now I’m much further down the road, I don’t want revenge because he doesn’t really matter any more. I see his sad little life, and if anything, I’m angry with myself for not seeing him as he really is in the first place. And, to be honest, any revenge I could wreak would pale in comparison to the damage he does to himself, merely by being him!
I do but don’t have the energy. Also, like you, have moved on, yes, you’ve put it well “sad little life”. Revenge would leave oneself hooked.
He will get what he deserves anyways, life has shown that to me several times.
Hi HG. You haven’t moderated my first comment. I read your Revenge book and executed a master plan using your guidance. Does that make me as bad as him?
There are a lot of comments in moderation. I am travelling at present so there is reduced time to moderate.
No, you are not as bad as a him.
Thank you HG…I thought there was something wrong with my Gravatar profile. Happy travelling😊
Bonnielou
Congrats on your successful revenge campaign. There’s no need for you to feel guilty, not even for a split second. They are abusers and treat people like furniture, any shots fired their way are well deserved.
Being an empath doesn’t mean you’re morally obligated to turn the other cheek for the rest of your life. Not when HG gifts us with such fine weaponry to go on a little crusade of our own with. Also, remember the motives. We do this for justice and – for me, admittedly – entertainment. Regardless of what measures you take, you are nothing like them and never will be.
What I have learned after 2 years from the discard – there will always be people around him, his puppets, his monkeys who will believe his lies.
There are tons of naive/desperate/lonely/hurt women who will believe he is their dream guy.
He is like phoenix. You can distroy him today, he will feel wounded but the next day he will start construnting new mask all over again. You will atack his infidelity, he will join the monastery to rescue his facade and make you a crazy one.
During these 2 years he has won lots of new friends and women and lost them. But he doesn’t mind, when you block him or kick him out of your life, he finds 3 more people for your place.
It is a waste of time. You can’t destroy them for good. .
Indeed. You cannot control us, you control yourself and that is how you win – GOSO.
Revenge is not necessary since he did it all to himself. Now the fourth woman that contacted me wanting to know about him. He is mentally ill.
So many women’s lives he has destroyed. The last one is writing to all his exes for answers. Stirring up a terrible story in the emotional sea.
He is outed and since he is a public figure he has no chance to hide or continue his game. He sits now in his debts, misery with children that have major problems, ex wife crazy psychopath and no work. He did it all by himself .. all I need to do was to live my life, go NC and wait for his world to crumble.
By the way, dear, any and everyone is allowed to feel the anger you incur. You don’t win by antagonizing, not at all. It’s never smart to win the battle and lose the war. Classic military strategy by losers.
I never felt the need for revenge and I still don’t! .Why would I when I knew that’s what he wanted all along and i’ll be damned if he was going to get it from me. When my love for him went then so did I. I had no intention of fighting for something that was never mine to begin with…Even when I walked out I left him to his rage and calmy looked him in the eye and said ‘you will never make me cry again’ and I was right…i can hardly picture his face now even if I try really hard. I had a relationhip with a blurry fictional character, I have now chosen to replace that character with Tom Hardy. I am a zero fuel zone and he knows it. Zero fuel = zero hoover.
Not quite. Zero fuel means reduced likelihood of hoover, but it does not guarantee zero chance of a hoover.
ok but it’s working well so far.. why would he hoover if there’s no fuel to be gained? iisn’t that the point of a hoover?
1. You may be providing fuel when you think you are not;
2. The hoover is for the Prime Aims, fuel is one part of those aims (albeit the most important) ;
3. The narcissist (dependent on the HEC) may still try and hoover because of a different perception and fail to secure the Prime Aims.
ok. well it’s working well so far. why would he try to hoover if there is no fuel to be gained. i thought that was the whole point?
1. You may think you are not providing fuel but you actually are – it is actually very difficult to provide no fuel if there is some form of interaction.
2. If you really are not providing fuel (because he cannot interact with you at all) he forgets about this over time and unconsciously believes he can obtain fuel, hence the issue of a lack of fuel becomes far less relevant.
3. There may be other factors in the hoover execution criteria outweighing the fuel issue.
4. He may be seeking residual benefits.
If you want to understand more about how this all meshes together (I have given you a broad brish response) I recommend you organise an email consultation.
Thanks HG.. He cannot interact with me and I don’t think there are any residual benefits other than my social circle. However I was wondering is there such a thing as fuel banking?ie.. I don’t provide fuel or react to his hoovers but his new IPPS is very insecure so if she sees his failed hoover attempt (which I’m sure she was supposed to) she may not react there and then (in public) but may do when they get home, therefore although I do nothing he will still gain fuel later from his new partner. so via me he could be banking fuel for later.
Is it revenge? Am I experiencing rage at you, self serving narc, bpd, or antisocial victim of a loveless family? It’s changed, yes, I was angry, yes, I would try to formulate a plot to make you pay for attacking me. But it’s different now isn’t it? The glass facade has shattered and everyone sees you naked and my dear, you aren’t the catch like you used to say….what was it? “I’m a famous person.”
No, I don’t feel rage. Everyone has woken to your evil and machinations and are disgusted. Deep in my core what I feel is gratefulness to a Higher Power Who stood in the gap to keep me from being ensnared by you. It’s been a real fight and right of passage but I’ve overcome.
I look at you and see a sad man, starving for a hug, needing the eyes the perfect woman in love with him, and needing the applause of approval he so desperately craves..but will never have.
I don’t feel rage anymore. I feel invincible.
Hello, Anonymous.
I enjoyed your comment about “starving for a hug.”
I hope you continue on your path of healing!
It’s best to go No Contact and redirect your desire for revenge to more productive and positive pursuits. Any type of engagement with them is toxic. Even if I managed to hurt them, the fact that I was still spending my time and energy towards them and maybe even doing stuff that are down to their level of nastiness was not a win for me. It did not elevate my spirit. I did not gain anything worthwhile. Even just talking about their filth makes me feel filthy. It’s best to not think about them not talk about them and not interact with them in any way.
Correct. This is logic.
I agree MP.
Well, I think that I am an exception…I would never let him destroy me and my peace ! After all, where I saw through him now, I couldn’t care less ! He is a Conmen, a Cheater, a Liar ! And that makes him worthless for me. It’s the arrogance, what is the biggest failure of their kind ! We are able to move on …I did …
What if all people you know have been manipulated by him, have taken his side, and you are now alone, have lost your job, have PTSD, panic attack, phobias, depression and cannot have a normal life? Ho can you don’t have a desire to see him totally destroyed?
Well, I am in the happy situation, that he lives in another country. So I can leave “it” behind me and move on … I was never so needy and always had a little bit of self confidence. After I saw through “it” , how he is … A liar, a cheater, an alcoholic, only a loser .. I worked on myself !! And after NO CONTACT, I found back to myself. Stop looking for revenge.. If you want to hurt him , you only have to FORGET (!) him , and move on with your life!! Remember who you are !! They are only empty shells. Everything (!!) was a lie!! You have to accepted it !! There are so many better men .. Wishing you all the best !! Greetings.
The best revenge for a narcissist, is to forget they even existed!
FM1T
This is so true and I truly enjoy the feeling of being NC and IGNORING him. Whether it matters to him or not, I still take my own internal pleasure from knowing that he no longer has ME as a member of his stupid fan club.
I don’t need to take revenge on him; all of my exes have gone bald after we split and he’s not gonna be an exception from what I heard … (though he’s not an ex, he’s just a mistake).
LOL! I love that. He is not going bald, but he’s greying — bad. And gaining weight steadily. So there’s that 😉
Hahaha! Mine won’t probably lose his six pack, but he will definitely lose his mane. Hello, alopecia!
I want a six pack!
Lorelei, your choice: six pack and no soul, or a nice empathic soul but fluffy? Either or either or…
I’m thinking a vibrator dear sweetest. Haha
Hahaha oh well, be it!
Better off with a 6 pack of beer and a vibrator for now.
Don’t get them muddled up, could be messy.
I’m gonna pretend I didn’t read you two.** Delete**
You started it by trying to get me to sleep with Santa Claus Sweetest!
Omg HG. Butt out of this.
No.
🤷🏼♀️
HG
“Don’t get them muddled up, could be messy.”
Haha. Sword swallowing and fountaining beer would still be more fun that rolling my eyes and having to repeatedly assure Cecil the Cerebral and Malcolm the Mid how I couldn’t have taken another inch or had been banged that hard over the course of minute and a half ever before.
Sex is like a box of chocolates………
This whole six pack, vibrator, tampon, dildo, vagal, sword swallowing thread is….is…I’ve got no words! Only at narcsite! I love that we can talk about anything here.
Except cooking
I’m thinking of releasing Angel’s Wings dildos for the adventurous Mid male narc. Mostly white but with a thick black streak. Performs with decency and is equipped with Super battery life to ensure prolonged performance. Made from titanium in a mirror finish to withstand substantial abuse. Presented in a glowing Empathy red sheath that can be spotted for miles. Has a diamond tip and is guaranteed to please until he lies. Then the wings expand and it drills deeper and deeper seeking the truth until a hospital visit is required.
Flashlight sold separately.
Haha NA! Yes indeed!
SweetP, fluffy 😂
Haha—yes yes..
Re: using dildos and beer interchangeably
not sure how we got here, but when I volunteered as a paramedic for a year after high school, we had some issues with girls that would dip tampons in vodka and then use them…appropriately.
The alcohol gets absorbed extremely quickly that way, leaving some girls in comatose condition and nobody had any idea what was going on.
So switching out one for the other might work in your favour, depending on what you’re aiming for. Just don’t swallow the dildo. Would have to be removed surgically.
Desirée, it all started with an innocent six pack. I’ve heard of that, it’s been a concern among young girls in Europe. So now that we are onto revenge and sex, I will share that I once gave a blowjob to a boyfriend who started screaming in pain “fire, fire!”. I forgot we had eaten Mexican and I love spicy food, and I had eaten poblano pepper. I can’t use this because I’m strictly under a NC regime, but I wanted to contribute some fun ideas…
Haha!! Hilarious.
Haha—I haven’t seen this, although I’ve heard of it. I’ve personally assisted in the removal of an anal dildo and cared for a lightbulb guy.. The anal dildo guy had a canal response and his heart rate dropped in the 20’s. Had to give Atropine.
Vagal* response
Oh his canal responded all right.…
Vagal lol. It was a weird error I made typing or by auto correct but it was humorous. It was a mess—I’ll never forget it. It was huge. He said it was his first time.
“His first time”… 😒 hahaha
Oh I know. Who would pick the biggest thing going for the first time?! I’m so glad my ex and ex’s never asked for weird stuff. Swallowing would have been too much to even ask for—although it was hinted at. I need to stop—I’m clearly no fun in bed.
Lorelei
No fun in bed to who? You should only do what you are comfortable with. If someone is genuine in caring for you, you should not feel pressured to do something uncomfortable under threat of displeasing or losing them. Huge red flag. We are not performing seals.
Good point NA. It’s all over anyway—HG has a good way of nixing such nonsense by teaching who pushes the boundaries etc. I am never being caught up with another narcissist again romantically.
The first time the vagal reacted instead of the canal
Haha Lou. That crappy business is dangerous frankly.
Desiree
In their defence Ketel One can read as Kegel One if you’re already on the party train.…
SweetesPerfection
That mexican food incident is noteworthy….I am currently in the midst of a revenge campaign which includes me staying well away physically but will make a note of this, regardless. Could be of use for future encounters with the opposite sex. One never knows when this kind of knowledge might come in handy. Also, I just love spicy food.
Re: vagal response and Kegel one
I would not have thought that this kind of procedure could provoke this kind of reaction…then again, a former colleague of mine once had to take care of lady who got a vagal response from brushing her teeth too hard, hitting the back of her gums repeatedly.
As for the Kegel one, this incident is entirely understandable when you look at it like that. Although I didn’t know that this was mostly an issure here in europe. Good lord we are stupid.
Hahaha,
It was always great fun when we got these patients in the ER. The poor Doctors never hear the end of it. The stories traveled from floor to floor. We had one very prim and proper doc that had his turn for the ER nightshift that I hadn’t worked with much so I thought this would be a great time to break the ice. When I inquired “how did that extraction go last night Dr.”? I had never seen someone turn so beet red. I don’t think the color left his face all day. Everyone was inquisitive that day.
Yes! me too! all of his other victims kept mine on their social media and what not…like come on! wise up ladies! join me in my army of 1 in No Contact and deplete this losers supply. lol
empath007
I know of just one other victim who still follows him on social media and and I feel the same way. Like, HELLO!!! Quit playing yourself, please. I’m embarrassed for her based on how he spoke of her, what I’d seen in their previous exchanges and what I know of their relationship. Block him girlfriend and deplete the supply!
What if you do it silently, via a third party?🤔
Pursue revenge? It depends whether your ET is low enough to enable that to be done effectively, but certainly using an intervening agent would be preferable to you doing it.
Is the secret wish of all of us. Drink a cup of hot tea in our comfortable home knowing that the revenge is taking on.