The Expanded Narcissistic Truths – No. 3


We come cloaked in our finery to dazzle and bewitch yet this enthralling and alluring appearance is but an artifice designed to cater to our needs and keep that which the world ought not to see at bay.

Shall I be the charming boyfriend who brings you breakfast in bed or the grizzled tyrant that bellows from the landing demanding to know why the right shirt is not available even though you ironed seven of them yesterday? Perhaps I will be the cheery neighbour who stops and compliments the fellow next door on his new motor vehicle or do I rake a key down the paintwork smiling to myself as I feel the Thought Fuel at his dismay washing over me?  How about being the benevolent boss who is magnanimous in his appraisal of a junior employee or might I be the savage dictator whose fleck infested diatribe reduces the underling to tears? Passionate lover or glacial companion? Entertaining purveyor of anecdotes or bilious issuer of put downs? Such choices.

Yet it is not just a matter of good or bad, there is more to layer on top of that. Do I regale my friends with that story of how I went marlin fishing in Bermuda to impress them even though it was my brother who went and I have taken his tale to be my own? Do I claim the theories of a fellow academic as mine when discussing matters with the undergraduates in my tutorial group? Do I claim to know much about the works of Bach because I have glanced over my girlfriend’s play list of classical music? That snippet of conversation that was overheard discussing the merits of staying at the Cavalieri Hotel in Rome and the ‘views to die for’ becomes my stay there last month. A useful review of Transpotting 2 in the broadsheets is commandeered to become my opinion which receives nods of approval when I recount it over dinner.

Why feel the need to be something that we are not? This varies dependent on the school from which we hail but at its essence remains this indisputable fact; we do not want to be nor can we be, that thing which we spend our time escaping from. Most of our kind do not realise this. They have no comprehension that a construct has been created for the purposes of ensnarement. Ensnarement of victims and the continuing ensnarement of The Creature. They do not know it, believing that their construct IS them and hence should you act in a way that attacks that construct through criticism then the response is intense, volcanic and instant. Those who form the majority of our ranks are unable to make such a distinction, unable to recognise what they have created and what they are imprisoning but believe their own creation to be them. Such is the power of delusion. They have no choice in determining what they will be today. They are governed by the instinctive need to respond as the fuel dictates and thus the rage-filled father who smashes his son’s favourite toy was not chosen but appeared because that was what was required to respond to his son running to his mother and not him. The doting son who faithfully calls his aged mother every Sunday without fail notwithstanding her dismissive treatment of him ordinarily is one compelled to do so in order to maintain his facade of decency and to irritate you when you suggest he ought to put her in her place. The quiet yet charming man who is the complete gentleman on the dates you have together is one which has been constructed out of need and is a programmed behaviour to bring about seduction. Whichever way these of our kind face is as a consequence of need – fuel, the facade, the acquisition of residual benefits – and it matters not if there is a swing from demon to angel in the space of the minute, but that is what must occur.

Furthermore, the repeated regurgitation of lies to furnish the construct for the purposes of  attraction is an instinctive response. The lie is believed because the Lesser or Mid-Ranger perceives his construct as what he or she is and thus the knee-jerk boasts, the blatant exaggerations and the out and out lies about achievements, status, job, number of lovers and the number of times one has seen U2 in concert are viewed as truth. Challenge them at your peril. The Lessers and Mid-Ranger have no choice in terms of how they furnish their construct and how they respond to the appliances around them.

The Greater of our kind exert choice but it is always within the confines of the overriding objective, namely, all is as the fuel wills it to be. Thus, the decision to berate a shop assistant is one of choice but is governed by the need for fuel. The decision not to answer your telephone calls is one of choice but again is subjected to the requirements of fuel. We Greaters have more substance than our lower-ranked brethren, we have the achievements, the abilities, the successes but it is never enough. One must be better, more popular, more attractive, more muscular, more accomplished, more, more, more. Thus that which is already there was deemed not to be good enough. So there must be the embellishments, the exaggerations, the add-ons. Pilfer here, acquire there, purloin this and steal that in order to make that cloak the finest ever created. You might suggest we ought to be content with the considerable abilities that we already possess but that is viewed from your perspective. From ours, there is always another higher mountain to conquer and it must be conquered because if we do not stop driving forward then we risk perishing.

I wield tremendous power. I can be anything I want and do whatever I please. Yet, as Lord Acton sagely stated,

“Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely.”

I have absolute power but it has been corrupted because it is always subject to another force, that of the need for fuel.

I appear as the dictator with seemingly unrestrained power and influence as I choose to be whatever I want to be.

Yet I have come to realise that I am the puppet government put in place by fuel.

Listen to ‘The Expanded Narcissistic Truths – No. 3’

46 thoughts on “The Expanded Narcissistic Truths – No. 3

  1. Survivor X says:

    Well, it’s a tempting offer. I’ve some funds saved up, already. Poisoning myself, now that’s more my deal. I ate plants as a child so perhaps I can make a meal of your books, also.

  2. Survivor X says:

    This makes things a lot more clear. I often wondered wouldn’t the narcissist feel very badly and lonely if no one truly knew or cared about him/ her as their authentic self? Even if they didn’t care about the havoc they created by fooling people, I would still wonder about how one could feel superior if they have no outside feedback regarding their true personality, especially with their over reliance on others to provide them with validation. Then, to gain fuel from those that have discovered the contradictions and disparities is quite baffling. It makes sense that many are completely oblivious that they are really playing a role, not unlike their targets. I liken it to a John soliciting a prostitute and insisting that they are good in bed because the prostitute they paid 2k said so.

    1. Survivor X. My understanding is that the Narcissism is a drive. A focus. It is busy ensuring there is at least sufficient fuel to sustain the Narcissist for survival in this world. So the Narcissist does not wallow around feeling sorry for himself or herself, or pondering the state of their affairs for any lengthy period of time, because the Narcissism directs their focus to do what is feasible and practical to keep the supply lines from drying up, and not to focus on the tediousness or oddness of it all. This focus is to strengthen and help the Narcissist to survive. This focus has to be consuming, because it depends upon other people, and people do not always fall in line for the Narcissist`s needs and at times people are unpredictable, so people management is quite time consuming for the Narcissist. This is what they are thinking about at all times. ~~~~Think of it like this: You are in the middle of a storm and you are looking for shelter and various buildings are being blown away, and a few are still standing and there is flooding, and some buildings are stable and you go there, but the storm is never ending so you never know when those stable buildings will fail and you are looking over the horizon for other possibly stable buildings, and while you are navigating all this, and in the middle of all this, you receive a phone call from someone that wants to talk to you about how you are feeling. You will tell them, I can not talk about that now of all things, if that is the only reason you are calling. And if you then proceed to ask the caller about shelter and the caller says no space is available during any storm, you would not have time for that call any longer. You would hang up immediately and still look for shelter for today and for tomorrow and for the day after that. That is the Narcissism. Always focused on actively finding fuel for the Narcissist. It is a constant drive. And constantly not concerned with discussing nor worrying about drudging up feelings, especially depressing, self defeating, smothering and negative feelings. Thus the survival mechanisms of grandiosity and entitlement are at the forefront of the Narcissist to encourage the Narcissist that winning is possible for him or her and it is their best and only option. Any discussions that are designed to take the Narcissists away from their desire to win, and belief that they are winning, from the Narcissists` point of view, will not be tolerated by their Narcissism, by any means necessary.

      1. Survivor X says:

        Yes, agreed! Also, however, the narcissist is a paradox and a liar, even to himself and especially about what he/she is truly feeling at any given moment. This study shows that physiologically narcissists are experiencing far different emotional reactions than what they themselves are self-reporting. I want to locate the study done recently that suggests this🧐lol oh ok here it is:

        1. HG Tudor says:

          Applies to many but not all, This is what I mean about there being incomplete and misleading information.

          1. Survivor X says:

            I would imagine there would be incomplete info, but wouldn’t it apply to most as the overflow of adrenaline and cortisol is generally seen in bodies of narcissists studied which would indicate the incredibly high-stress level many are operating under. Perhaps if it is a level of stress one is used to so it’s not viewed as a problem until a physician notices the dangers. Additionally, lack of self-awareness that many narcissists display does not just extend to their actions. It applies to their physical well-being, also. If you believe that you are immortal, indulge in magical thinking about your impeccable health, your ability to detect health issues or even your own inner homeostasis is compromised.

          2. Survivor X says:

            durp. nm. you just said what I said. Lol it’s been a long day. I destroyed my shoes. It’s hot as hell.

          3. HG Tudor says:

            Those are all valid points Survivor X and they certainly apply to certain narcissists, but not all.

          4. Survivor X says:

            HG, do you sleep? Due to my empathic nature I’m corncerned for your well-being.

          5. HG Tudor says:

            Yes I do. The sleep of the righteous.

          6. Survivor X says:

            Well, ummm, okay sure, lol but it just seems like you don’t sleep, at all. I’m sure that’s not the case. It’s probably just time zone cornfusion. It happens.

          7. HG Tudor says:

            You are correct. I do not sleep much, there is too much to achieve.

          8. Survivor X says:

            Sure, but there are many studies that indicate the essential benefits that sleep provide. I’m sure you’re aware of them and perhaps you feel that you are the exception. True, there are some people who need very little sleep to function, but they are few and far between. Additionally, there’s a plethora of studies done about workflow and how it improves little if people work beyond an 8 hour day.

            This also reminds me of another question I’ve considered..

            How does one acheive, and build a legacy as you intend to do and not reveal who they truly are? Does it bother you that you’re not given personal credit?

          9. HG Tudor says:

            I am well aware of them thank you. It is not an issue.

            Of course I am given personal credit.
            People email me, just because it is not directed to my real name does not matter, it is still read by me.
            People talk to me in consultation, just because they do not know who I am does not lessen the imapct of their thanks and gratitude.
            Where people mention me across the internet as HG Tudor, I know that is me.
            I saw somebody reading No Contact on the London Underground earlier this year. That was a small piece of my legacy.
            I am not interested in people stopping me in the streets and going ‘OMG you are HG Tudor, you saved my life.’
            One can achieve a legacy very readily without compromising my identity.

          10. Survivor X says:

            OMG HG that makes sense. I was just curious.

          11. HG Tudor says:

            Nothing wrong with curiosity.

            Of course it made sense. I wrote it.

          12. Survivor X says:


          13. MB says:

            Did you comment on the book the person was reading? Please tell me you acknowledged them somehow! That is too funny.

          14. HG Tudor says:

            Of course I did, how do you think The Shieldmaiden and I met?

          15. MB says:

            That would make a romantic story, but I ain’t buying it! Ha ha

          16. HG Tudor says:

            Well done. I was pulling your leg.

          17. MB says:

            Speaking really would be a dead give away. But a nod? a wink? or just thought fuel was enjoyed.

          18. alexissmith2016 says:

            Goodness – If I saw someone reading one of your books on the underground I’m not sure I’d be able to help myself but approach them. You show amazing self control!

          19. HG Tudor says:

            I do, but I did approach the reader.

          20. Survivor X says:

            I’d approach them and just for laughs rip myself to like, “OH GAWD you waste your time reading THAT BOOK?” and roll my eyes incredulously.

          21. HG Tudor says:

            That does not surprise me.

          22. Survivor X says:

            Self-deprecating humor is not your jam, I realize.

          23. alexissmith2016 says:

            So someone on here now knows what you look like…Oh god! I’m going to carry my books everywhere I go, on the off-chance. I might hold one in each hand and staple another one to my back

          24. HG Tudor says:

            Ah but did I say I revealed I was the author.

          25. alexissmith2016 says:

            Did you speak…or remain mute?

          26. HG Tudor says:

            I smiled.

          27. alexissmith2016 says:

            Hahahaaa okay! If it was me and I’d heard your sexy voice, I think I’d have been like a Pavlovian dog. And I wouldn’t have drooled at the mouth.

            I’ll be sure to carry my books with me everywhere and then stalk anyone who is gen x and smiles at me!

          28. Survivor X says:

            My sister stapled her finger to see what it felt like when she was four. I would imagine stapling HG’s books to one’s back would feel similarly.

          29. HG Tudor says:

            If you can staple all my books to your back without assistance I will pay handsomely.

          30. alexissmith2016 says:

            Goodness! That’s so cute lol

          31. Survivor X says:

            Yea she was a cutie. She had huge cheeks back then bc she was sneaking spoonfuls of butter from the fridge without my mother’s knowledge.

          32. Desirée says:

            Is it fuel to you to see someone in public reading one of your books. or is it just an acknowledgement because there is no emotion in them reading your book without knowing you are right there?

          33. HG Tudor says:

            Thought Fuel.

  3. Joanne says:

    I got my exorcise tank top! 😀

    1. HG Tudor says:

      HG approves.

      1. Lorelei says:

        Is it a bad idea to buy tote bags for the kids to take to their dad’s house? Or t-shirts?

        1. HG Tudor says:


          1. Lorelei says:

            He probably wouldn’t make a connection and if he ever googled it he is still too afflicted to connect the dots. Why did I get such a bad one?

    2. MB says:

      The tee looks great on you Joanne! My narcissistic trait of envy is activated by those whose thighs don’t touch. #nothingpersonal #justjelly #mbthickthighs

      1. Joanne says:

        lol, MB
        Thank you! I wore it proudly 😊🛡

        1. Lorelei says:

          Where is the photo?

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