The Pursuit of Revenge



I know you hate me. Your kind are filled with love and then filled with hate. There is no need to deny it. It is a normal reaction for someone like you and one which I entirely endorse and encourage. I know you will try and mask that burning anger that you feel by saying you pity me or that you have nothing but contempt for me but I can see it. Those sensational eyes of yours that once blazed with desire, passion and most of all hope, are now filled with the churning, billowing flames of hatred. Some of you will fight to contain this sensation. You fear that by giving in to this hatred that you will somehow be on a level with me. I can ease your fears in that regard. You are nowhere near my level and nor were you. I placed you far higher than me to begin with. Yes it was artificial and all part of my design but you had no complaint then did you? You did not object or demur when I thrust you skywards and planted you no that pedestal. Of course you did not. Who would? Nobody would and least of all somebody like you. Now you are on your true level, way down below me, cast onto stony ground, broken and shattered. Amazing though isn’t it how you managed to summon such an anger from somewhere. How many times had you said to your confidantes that you felt numb (yes they were reporting back to me). Yet now look at you. A seething, glowering fireball of hatred and it is all directed at me. I adore this.

You want to destroy me. I know you do. You all do. The one before you was exactly the same as the one before was and the one before her. The next one will be just the same,although I do still hold out some hope that she might just be different and somehow avoid the mistakes all those who have gone before have made. I have seen this hatred many times and your desire for revenge is strong. Of course it is. I made it this way. Everything I did as I brought you down low was programmed to cause you to eventually explode into hatred. From elation to despair, through broken to numb. Eventually the switch would be flicked and as puppet master I ignite the fire beneath you which stokes the flames of hatred. Despise me, go on, do it. Send those wicked words towards me. Tell me what a bastard I am. Keep it coming. Pull you hair, wave your fist and stamp your feet. Tell me how you are going to scratch my car. Feels good does it not? Believe me, it feels even better being on the receiving end of your bile and hate. Go on, sit with your friends and plot your revenge, I can feel you all huddled around your cauldron as you try and concoct ways at getting back at me. I feel so powerful knowing you are focussed on seeking retribution. This is what I want. I want to bask in the heat of your anger, I want to be covered in the disgust and distaste that you will spew towards me. I want you scheming, hatching and planning. By hurting you do deeply I plant inside you that overwhelming desire to get even with me. It happens every time and is all part of my master plan to ensure you, my beautiful appliance keep pouring fuel in my direction. I make you seek revenge for in doing so, your planning and ham-fisted execution of the same give me what I want. Fuel. You are blinded with your hatred so that you fail to realise you will not succeed in gaining revenge, not by shouting, spitting and scratching. Oh no, this overload of howling anger is just a banshee of fuel to me. I will twist and shift as I thwart your attempts, laughing at your pathetic efforts to try and get one over on me. This will spur you on as I lead you on yet another merry dance as I continue to take from you exactly what I need. So please, seek your revenge. You will not get it but I will be delighted seeing you try.

4 thoughts on “The Pursuit of Revenge

  1. Joa says:

    I do not hated two ex-narcissists.

    There were strong attacks of anger. Yes.

    My anger is like a blown bomb, but it wears off pretty quickly.

    Revenge … something’s up πŸ™‚ But it’s not a narcissistic revenge. Take it slow and easy. I stretch in time. I am myself and I do mine. It gives me confidence.

    The outbursts of “my N” hate during the hoover initially caused pain, for a while there was fear, but then… they gave me unearthly pleasure. I “provoked” him – stoic calmness, indifference, belittled him by amusing jokes.

    As I read this text HG, I felt a growing excitement.

    Pathetic for an – I guess – Emapta πŸ™‚

    I wonder if it was included in the game plan. It certainly got me hooked. He is certainly much closer now, than it was two years ago, when he was “stranger”.

    If it was a planned episode in a longer term scenario, he might win. If he has already exhausted the script, he did not do well πŸ™‚

  2. Catherine Mitchell says:

    Is there a type of person that can hold a narcs attention?

    ‘The next one will be just the same,although I do still hold out some hope that she might just be different and somehow avoid the mistakes all those who have gone before have made.’

    You hope… as in leaves you before you break her… or, just does things differently?

    I just want to be clear… narcs prey on people that they wish they could be more like, or on a challenge (disinterested party at first) that doesn’t get away in the end, etc… all for the purpose of fuel….
    Then things become too mundane, so therefore it is time to punish who ever it is for the sins of your mother or any character that wounded you… then the fuel from the mind games levels up the excitement…. swaying back and forth from prince to evil frog, and watching the once together person slowly start unhinging… it is that black and white thinking, either that person is rubbish or they are great…. until they are of little purpose and will dispose of. Maybe pull it out the trash here and there for snippets of fuel.

    In the meantime you have had lots of additional fuel from other women in the background… and had the replacement lined up ages ago.

    Why don’t you narcs just kill yourselves?? Honest to fuck, it is like human abominations.

  3. Misty says:

    That explains this:

    Him: You hate me.
    Me: I don’t hate you.
    Him: Yes you do.
    Me: No. I don’t.
    Him: Yes you do. You hate me and I hate you.
    Me: I don’t hate you. You hate yourself.
    Him: *silent treatment – 2 weeks*

  4. Just me says:

    What if I see how you try to play me and just step away from you? A little step at a time? Making you believe I am confused and need a bit of a distance. What if I keek on dancing one step back, one step forward, one and a half steps back and one forward and so on until one day I tell you that you pushed me away and now I am gone

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