What We Actually Hear You Say To Us



I make repeated mention of how the key to gaining freedom is to understand. One of the central principles to understand with our kind is the fact that our perspective is very different from yours. You gauge our responses, our actions and our words through the lens of your world view. That is understandable, but it will only lead to you becoming mired in confusion, frustration and bewilderment, trapped in the quagmire of emotion which of course is where we want you to always be. We do not want you applying cool, hard logic to prise yourself free from our grip. We want you embroiled in emotion.

Of course we prefer to make it seem that you engage in double speak. Our private paranoia causes us to twist what you say in order to use it to our advantage, but then we always do this. We always seek to profit from fabricated misunderstanding and false inferences, but the reality is we do also actually hear something completely different from what you say to us because of our existence in a different reality.

Accordingly, you need to understand that we operate in a different world view to you and once you ascertain that world view, you are unlikely to like what you see there, but you will begin to make sense of what we say and do. As part of this understanding, you should appreciate that when you say certain things to us, we hear something else. Here are ten examples, to assist your comprehension of our kind.

  1. The dinner you made was lovely

The dinner you made was better than anything I have ever tasted before. Your skills in the kitchen are beyond compare. You are truly talented and gifted. I am so fortunate that someone as brilliant as you made something so tasty and delicious as that meal for someone like me. I am amazed and astounded by your talent and thank my personal god every day that you are in my life.

  1. I don’t know what I would do without you

You are my everything. My beginning and end. I am nothing without you. I would not function without your skilful operation of me. I have now submitted to your total control of me, I am in your hands, do with me what you will.

  1. I love you

I don’t just love you, I love you with everything that I have, every fibre of my being and every molecule inside me because you are so magnificent that I am compelled to provide you with this astonishing and amazing love. I cannot find the words to express the extent of my love for you but it is beyond anything I have ever experienced before because you made me feel this way.

  1. I hate you

You are powerful, masterful and the puppet master. You are so skilled that you can make me gush with emotion at the merest flick of your wrist or the raising of your eyebrow. I cannot help but feel like this because you have me so entangled in your dark and admittedly brilliant machinations. I may say I hate you but it is really a form of admiration at the magnificence by which you operate your dark arts.

  1. I don’t understand you

I am stupid and weak. If I wasn’t I would understand wouldn’t I. This is a frustrated admission on my part that I pale by comparison to you. You are a colossus, a behemoth who is far better than me and I can only look on in rapt awe as you forge your way through life. I don’t understand you but I wish I could be like you.

  1. Please stop hurting me

Your machinations are highly effective and I cannot stop spurting with fuel for you. You may as well keep going because you have me all worked out, but I still have lots and lots of delicious fuel to spill for you.

  1. No

I am trying to stand up to you but we both know that cannot happen. I am just a wretch compared to you, but I try to think otherwise, but I am doing this for you. I am saying this to invite you to exert your authority over me and to punish me for my insolence. I want you to do so because I know this is what my role is, a conduit for you to achieve what you want, so I say it so you can open the door to yes.

  1. I just want to be happy

I am a selfish person who as usual is putting my needs before yours which is completely wrong so you must correct me, teach me and make me learn my lesson in the way only you can do.

  1. I am sorry

I am utterly useless and pathetic. I ought to have known better but as usual I just decided to do what I wanted and forgot how that might impact on you. You are generous and kind and I beg your forgiveness in the knowledge that I deserve none. If you choose to make an example of me for my frequent erring and repeated apologies, then so be it. You know best.

  1. You are wrong

I want to destroy you. I am wounding you. I know how to weaken you and I have done this to bring you to your knees. Yes, I am a traitor, a treacherous betrayer of your magnanimous nature but I do not care. Does it hurt? Does it burn? Good. I want to see you weaken, shrivel and cease to exist.

20 thoughts on “What We Actually Hear You Say To Us

  1. horseyak says:

    Except for being the stupidest woman in the world for talking about opposing religions in the wrong household, she indeed was one smart royal cookie . Since you are familiar with this episode as I knew and hoped you would be was it not the greatest narc moment in the world when, after that moment, and Henry dismisses her, Henry’s right hand guy asks him, “So should I tear up the arrest warrant?” And Henry says with a straight face, ” No, are you fucking nuts?” Then two scenes later this shmuck goes to deliver the arrest warrant, Henry plays stupid, publicly shames him for the audacity of delivering the arrest warrant then scares the shit out of the queen a SECOND time before relaxing in the notion that finally everyone knows they better not fuck with the king. You have inherited some fantastic genes, HG. 🙂

  2. horseyak says:

    Every time you reprint this I always think about the finale of The Tudors where Henry VIII’s last wife talks her way out of a likely beheading with her”I am but a woman” speech. THIS was a woman who knew how to manipulate a malignant narcissist.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      She laid on the fuel didn’t she?

  3. Lydia says:

    Oh Mr. Tudor, how I would love to tell my ex that I don’t love him, never did and he is being methodically and ever so beautifully erased from my memory along with our so called “relationship”. It’s becoming as if he never even existed. Of course, I would deliver this proclamation to him without the slightest emotion. Wouldn’t want him to partake in my “fuel” of joy and happiness. 🙅

    1. Revenge fantasy is my new porn lol. “The only woman who can fuck you better than me is karma.” And I am gonna be her accomplice.

  4. giulia says:

    I don’t hear you altogether….
    Kisses 🙂

  5. shantily says:

    Lmao 😂 #8. Is just so tragically twisted OMG !!! Hahaha.

    Bet your thoughts to “I just want to be happy.” is also made with an inner eye roll 🙄 ha!

    1. Gabrielle says:

      What about #8 reversed? When HE says to ME: “I want YOU to be happy”. I got that one in an email about a month ago. Since he is a mid range cerebral smarty ass this was his exact quote….

      “It is my desire that you find the greatest richest happiness available in all humankind. Because you deserve it.”

      1. shantily says:

        Oh yeah be Happy Shan all the best you and your family love always …. bye bye until I’m in withdrawal and need to torture you again 😂❤️👍

  6. Amy S. says:

    My mid Ranger narcissist said that he is ‘on fire’ this morning after we chatted a bit. He waited for me so I had no choice but to talk to him. What did he mean by ‘I am on fire’. Could he have meant ‘ I have gained fuel’? But he doesn’t know what he is…

    1. HG Tudor says:

      He feels edified by your exchange and his statement is a manifestation of the recipient of fuel. Of course he does not know this is precisely what it is, but his response demonstrates to you how your fuel affects him. An excellent example in a succinct fashion.

      1. Amy S. says:

        Thank you

  7. lansealan says:

    by me

    I know who you are
    I know what you are
    I know what you do
    I know why you do it
    I loved you
    I hated you
    I hated me
    I found me
    I love me
    I don’t know you
    I never did
    I don’t want to

    1. Victoria says:

      lansealan, I love what you wrote-thanks for sharing!

    2. lansealan says:

      Just re-read this and noticed I did not emphasize any “feelings” on their part. Wonder why??? Ha!
      Wasn’t intentional consciously?
      Thank you sub-consconcious!

    3. EXACTLY!!

  8. Andria Baxter says:

    Hi HG
    What would you hear if someone said ” I’m really sorry, I can’t talk now I’m having my nails done” without even a fraction of
    Emotional content xx
    Sent from my iPhone

    1. HG Tudor says:

      We would hear

      “You are not important enough to talk to.”

      Thus we would be wounded by criticism. Expect your nail varnish to be poured down the sink!

  9. KT says:

    HG how would it make a narcissist feel if you apologized to him after he disengaged and doesn’t respond to your messages. Would it mean anything to him at all?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      It would be fuel and depend on your fuel ranking, the method by which it is delivered and how often it is delivered.

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