I’m only just beginning to see that my mother was a mid-range victim narc — and understand how much she damaged me. As a child, I was never praised for my successes, because they were just expected. She always basked in my accomplishments as though they were hers. Yet she admitted years later that there were several instances where she deliberately undermined me and kept me from getting recognition I deserved. (She was a teacher at the school I attended, so was able to influence these things.) What’s up with that? I guess it was ok for me to do well as long as it reflected positively on HER, but it couldn’t go so far as to attract too much attention to ME. I was, after all, just an appliance.
I can see how she set me up to repeatedly fall prey to narcs in my adult life. But no more. Now I have narc radar (narcdar?), thanks to HG.
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I’m only just beginning to see that my mother was a mid-range victim narc — and understand how much she damaged me. As a child, I was never praised for my successes, because they were just expected. She always basked in my accomplishments as though they were hers. Yet she admitted years later that there were several instances where she deliberately undermined me and kept me from getting recognition I deserved. (She was a teacher at the school I attended, so was able to influence these things.) What’s up with that? I guess it was ok for me to do well as long as it reflected positively on HER, but it couldn’t go so far as to attract too much attention to ME. I was, after all, just an appliance.
I can see how she set me up to repeatedly fall prey to narcs in my adult life. But no more. Now I have narc radar (narcdar?), thanks to HG.
Narcdar ! LOL ~ that’s awesome RN !
I feel sorry for this little guy. 😉 Some memories don’t fade.
The golden child…yes bc you conditioned me to be this way and earn your attention along with everyone elses.
The scapegoat child…your way of making me think my feelings are attention seeking and invalid.