The Igniters of Fury – No. 16
76 thoughts on “The Igniters of Fury – No. 16”
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He charmed my animals and then loved to say “animals can read people”.. well they did. During his last week here, one by one.. they ALL bit him. I thought it very odd. None of them are aggressive, but they have been protective of me. It makes perfect sense now.
Dear Mr Tudor,
Does a narcissist view us as their “pet” ?
Thanks
Please see the article ‘Pet’.
Should I go fetch popcorn? I feel that popcorn is in order here.
Popcorn, ha ha ha!
Dear Giulia,
you are a ugly dumb narcissist.
Renee,
So you are going to triangulate a innocent animal, who wants nothing more than to love you, and be loved by you in return, with some sick warped minded individual.
Are you sure you are a Empath?
Renee, please seek help.
Renee,
I am sorry, that post was for Guilia.
Guilia wants to purchase a dog to triangulate with her narcissist. What a terrible, awful, poor excuse to get a poor innocent animal for; triangulate a dog with a narcissist. Sick!
Narc affair,
Your wrong, I did not see your post, so ain’t nobody starting no drama. I am just stating #facts…….
Dear HG tudor n1fan, you are a pretty dumb empath.
HG fan ….those arent facts theyre judgements. What is fact is you start drama.
So true! I’m an animal lover who has a dog and a cat. It’s such a relief not to have to deal with the negativity about having animals anymore.
My exN loved my dog Bella. They were both in need of training… the dog was young and energetic (and so was my BF attitude) and I was in the process of training her in verbal commands. Then one day the backyard gate was ajar (my lawn man left it open unknown to me) and she ran out and got hit by a car in my own development by my neighbor. The dog was very lovable and had the most soulful eyes. Innocent, playful and loving. I also have a cat that will find the nearest lap as soon as you sit down. A people cat also very affectionate. ExN BF loved the attention she gave him too.
After break up, he gets a cat of his own… but I know that he’s rarely home so the kitten is all alone for many, many hours. The kitten needs some sort of socialization but he doesn’t seem to understand that. I see exactly what HG talks about as everything is an appliance.
When my dog got hit by the car…. the BF showed questionable empathy. He did help dig the hole with my son to bury the dog, but later I could tell that he rarely thought about Bella at until I mentioned that I missed her. This was another lesson is seeing his lack of empathy as is now known (to me) as a narcissistic trait.
And he always put me down because he says “you train kids and dogs”… as if that were something horrible. The reason you ‘train’ them is so that when you see immediate danger and you yell for them to stop then they should stop… not keep on going into the danger while thinking it’s a game to run away when Mommy yells stop. This is totally to keep them safe, not just because I want to be in control as he would suggest. But then again, I always thought he was a bad parent in many more ways than this.
You sure it was the lawn man that left the gate open? No im not kidding.
This one i think like other areas differs from narc to narc.
My narc loves pets especially dogs. Ive even felt triangulated with my dog at times by him and no its not a narc trait on my part. I dont mind bc i love my lil pips but there were other shelving issues going on and it was intentional. I could never feel fury over a pet. They are the sweetest creatures.
My psychopath brother in law on the other hand gets very jealous and angry over my sil dog. They have no children so shes poured her love onto her dog. Her dogs been her rock of support thru the abuse. She had the sweetest little chi pom dog before her present dog and my bil woke early and said he found it dead near its foodbowl a supposed choking accident. Yet the dog would shake when he was around and avoid him. The dog would be alone with him when she was working. One she had to take a work trip for 3 days and worried the whole time about her present dog. Thankfully its ok.
Anything that takes the spotlight snd attention off the narc triggers fury.
My mother in law would get very snitty bc my sweet chihuahua would get so excited when id come home from work but wouldnt warm up to her. It would bother her so much she would start bragging how much my sil dog loved her and would watch in the window for her. Even a dog makes her insecure lol
Very disturbing post, indeed. Please elaborate.
I even tried to tell the breeder of the dog he got, that he is aggressive, violent at times and that he takes no responsibility in life, whatsoever. She did not believe me. She had «such a great impression of him» from talking in the phone, and she was sure this was just happening as long as he was with me, «Maybe it will be different when he is with somebody else». 🙈😄
Leolita,
You should of saved the dog and took the dog from him.
Folks, you need to understand, animals do not have a voice.
Therefore, animals are victums without a voice. You must be their voice. Be the voice for the helpless; such as, babies & animals.
He has made the breeder one of his sources, either IPSS or Non intimate SS. What can I do? I can’t just take his dog. I told her that he had not socialized it properly, that the dog seemed nervous, barking a lot and sometimes very scared of him. The thing is, he is a carer for the dog (don’t know any better Word for it, I am Sorry, and not from England) that meant that the breeder owns the dog legally for two years until it has had puppies, but the dog lives with him (the narc) the whole time (exept when puppies). So, they have regular contact and she thinks he is a wonderful person. Should I try and convince her he is a narc? Have thought about it, but think it’s more likely she just thinks I’m the jealous crazy ex he has (most likely) said I am.
No, trying to convince the new appliance is almost always doomed to fail.
We are struggling to find our silenced, squelched, snuffed out voices to now sing in choir of survivors. I love animals. And get the point. But we “should” do a lot that we do not do. Lastly. The abuser? SHOULD NOT ABUSE. Highly sensitive to victim blame. We cannot see straight, gagged and tied. I should be better, stronger, nicer, kinder, more this more that. Taller, prettier, thinner. Etc. No. No. No. Abuse should not happen. Period. All on them. The abusers. Should. Not.
So true #1.
Narcs who HATE pets don’t want them around, cuz pets can detect the evil in them!
Yeah, I thought a dog or small child could detect evil, but….Dogs loved my narc, and small children thought he looked like santa.
It depends on the dog, Perse
Each dog is different
Thepianist20,
True, and I’m sure I didn’t see every interaction my narc had with a dog, but all I’ve seen have liked him at least initially.
Maybe he had a scent of something that dogs find attractive, like, oh, i dunno, rotting carcass? POS? That’s what I think about instead of thinking we give dogs undue credit for insight. 😉
Bad Logical Thinking. LOL
Perse
LOL.
If the dog is harsh like the narc, or is attracted to harsh nature, then the dog will like the narc.
Otherwise, no way! Dogs that are good naturally would prefer barking at the narc
Dogs loved my most recent narc. He stopped to pet every dog we ever encountered. He had probably 4 golden retrievers throughout his adult life (apparently) and he gave them all the same name.
His last name.
He left “our” dog (that he manipulated me into getting) with me – but I am confident if the dog ever saw him again he’d freak out with happiness and pee himself with joy.
Dumb dog.
Correct
Yep, so true
@strongerwendy
Golden Retrievers are very docile. Since, they are very docile, they would submit to anyone, including the narc in your life.
Can a narc provide a good life for a dog? My ex got a dog just after I got a dog – was this an example of mirroring my interest?
The dogs became frightened by his screaming and aggressive behaviour on many occasions.
After I went NC, he got one more dog and used it AS a reason to try to contact me (hoovering?)
I have been worried about how he is treating the dogs.
Potentially but it would only be for the purposes of triangulation.
Dogs love my exhusband and he loves to interact with them. He sure seems to be getting fuel from the way they respond to him, even when no one is watching. They go absolutely nuts when he shows them attention. He does almost nothing to take care of them though. Only puts food out and that’s all, but they all think he hung the moon! 🌙
Feed an animal and it “loves” you. Cupboard love.
Fuel a narc and we “love” you. Narcissist love.
Ha, ha, HG! That similarity is just a coincidence. Dogs are about the least narcissistic animal I know! Most dogs are very empathic, since they communicate by movement and gesture and have a pack first mentality.
You are correct about winning their affections thru feeding, though. The difference from a narc, however, is once you’ve win a dogs heart, you have it till they die. Even if you never feed them again.
I am not convinced. If you do not feed the dog but the neighbour does I know where that dog would go and live.
That just proves they’re not stupid. They do have to eat! But even if the dog lives with the neighbor, he will still love those who are kind to him and with whom he has previously bonded.
Do your homeless people/street people not have dogs? They all do here. A homeless person’s dog doesn’t leave him to go live at a wealthy person’s house where the food is better and the living conditions more comfortable. He stays with his human, sleeping outside and eating what little is shared with him.
Well dogs are stupid WS2, loyal but stupid. They ought to be trading up, not hanging around on a piece of string in a doorway with a homeless person!
Most don’t even need the string! Lol!
Loyal is not synonymous with stupid. And if any of us, no matter our intelligence (dogs included), have a relationship with someone who truly loves and cares for us – there is no “trading up.”
Windstorm and HG
I am not calling anyone a dog but I couldnt help but see much of the Narc/Empath dynamic in your discussion………
Windstorm: Once you win a dogs heart you have them until they die. Even if you never feed them again.
I couldnt help but hear that as a Narc speaking of an empath.
HG: If you do not feed that dog but the neighbour does, I know where that dog will go
Yes they will eventually go where their needs are filled even though their heart remembers the past.
HG: They ought to be trading up, not to be hanging around on a piece of string with a soulless person.
Indeed. Ok lets call soulless was a Freudian slip.
Just me?
NarcAngel
Did he say “soulless”? I didn’t even catch it! 😄
Windstorm
No. HG said homeless and I changed it to soulless calling it a Freudian slip.
Windstorm
Seriously, do you think dogs are attracted to your ex because they recognize him as Alpha?
NarcAngel
Yes. Absolutely. Even my own dogs go nuts over him which is somewhat obnoxious. They see him as the Alpha.
Dogs arent stupid. Loyal to a fault but i wouldnt classify them as stupid. There are so many different types of service dogs. Dogs that can predict seizures in people. Seeing eye dogs. Dogs used to find crime scenes. They also are deeply empathetic and can sense when someones unhappy or not well.
They possess senses or more strongly than humans do.
I love cats and other pets too but dogs ate my favorite ❤
Hi narcangel.. i agree with your post about the dog discussion relating to the empath/ narc dynamic. I see the connection there where we the empaths are looked on as weak or dumb but look at HG’s mum and youll see where it came from. No disrespect HG just my opinion on your statement about dogs.
You are welcome to express it NA.
Ty HG 🙂
Thank you. That makes sense. But when is the fury ignited? Is it when we have a pet, or when you have one? and why does it ignite your fury?
If you give your pet attention, you are in effect ignoring us and giving “fuel” to something that neither deserves or needs it. That wounds us and causes the ignition of fury. If you read the book ‘Fury’ it will enable you to understand more about this key component of the narcissistic dynamic.
Thank you so much for your informing and kind answer. I will buy Fury and also the other books – as soon as possible. Seems I can not learn enough about this. Feels so great to finally get the explanations to all the why’s about both his and my own behaviour. Thank you for sharing this information, I love to read your posts.
You are welcome.
I’m going to get one this afternoon, to piss him off, because I like it.
A dog? What breed? Congrats!
narc affair,
You are just as bad, you are condoning this cruel behavior.
A mini minscher. Small, always around, they get attached only to one person of the house and they will not get anybody close to her or her belongings. If you are not the chosen one, they will consider you the enemy, therefore You must ve attacked and destroyed.
Lovely :)))
So you are going to use a innocent animal who wants to be loved and love you to triangulate with some gravely ill but of a human.
You need help. Are you sure you are a empath?
Good pt HG #1 fan i wasnt thinking that way when i read it but maybe not the best idea if your narc hates pets. Its sad but you will never be able to leave your pet alone and trust its ok.
Hg tudor fan…i already posted that i had not read it that way and you seen my post so stop starting drama.
So you are going to use the animal as a prop? You sound like a narc yourself. That is a horrible and irresponsible reason to get a pet.
I agree.
Ah, pissing off a Narc intentionally. What could possibly go wrong?
Doesn’t that seem a bit ironic to you that you’ll be using an animal to further your own agenda in that regard?
Food for thought.
Snow on the page, HG. LOL Nice touch! 😀
I cant see the snow on my phone for some reason
My N brought me toooooooooooooo many pets. He also did not ask me if I wanted them. When I objected he said they were HIS pets, but he did zero to care for them. Wouldn’t even bother to let them out, or clean up when he didn’t let them out, or put water in their bowls.
If I went somewhere, I’d have to call him to feed the animals, and listen to him as he did it or he’d forget, and didn’t think it was any big deal.
I think the meme is jealousy over attention to pets, but some N’s use them to bind or as props or distractions.
Why?!? My dog died and became very sick quickly when I was with him and my dog was very healthy before, questioned it in my mind. My dog was my everything too. He had three dogs that I loved but I felt like I needed to give his dogs more in which I did.
Do you think????
Please never have children, Renee.
Renee,
Please don’t purchase anymore animals.
How did you not know how, or why your dog got sick all of a sudden. If you were paying the same amount of attention, to your dog as you did you his 3-dogs; you would’ve known why your beloved animal was sick.
Plain and simple, it is neglect on your part.
Without animals, there is no life.
Yuppers …animals are superior in a lot of ways! They have pureness of heart 💓
Bibi,
Animals are love.
Omg!! Never ask for a real pet. He used to have outside dogs in a kennel. Only 2 cups of food a day.
Now his pet is a turtle. That’s it.
Holy cow. When I mentioned a dog I got to hear all the horrible things they do to a home.
That’s hilarious HG! Then why on earth did he always ask me to get a dog? Claiming he loved dogs do much?
When is your next live broadcast? I didn’t receive a notification for yesterday’s. 😣 I do not want to miss this one. Will you please let us know?
Thank you!
Peaceful
Peaceful
Yesterday’s live broadcast? I never heard about it either. Was there really one?
No.
Thanks for the answer, HG. I’d hate to miss one. I really love those and stay online for their entirety!
No problem. Thank you. It was a test and I answered a few questions purely through text for a while. It was not advertised.