The Stolen Case of No

THE STOLEN CASEOF NO.jpg

 

No is a familiar word from our lips and I have explained its extensive use and important value to our kind on a previous occasion. We use now to exert our hold over you. It is not only used in that sense but also as a reminder that you have lost the use of no because we steal that from you and then, when saying “no” to you on a repeated basis we are flaunting what we have taken from you.

We steal your ability to say no very soon into the entanglement. We pluck it away from you with ease and subterfuge so that it seems as if you have placed the use of the word “no” into retirement when actually it has been carefully and quietly spirited away from you. During devaluation, the theft is far more apparent. It has been a brazen burglary, a smash and grab as each time we metaphorically hit you over the head (and in some cases also do so literally) and make off with your use of the word “no”. It is removed from you forcibly and then waved around in front of you on a daily basis, a vicious reminder that we can use it and you cannot. Therein this underlines our superiority over you. The acquisition of the word “no” is an early and key aim of when we ensnare you. We set out to take it from you, acquire it for our own extensive use and deny you the opportunity of using it ever again. Inevitably the questions of how and why we do this manifest. First of all, how do we achieve this pilfering? What forms does it take?

  1. You lose the capacity to say no to our advances during seduction.
  2. You cannot say not to spending time with us.
  3. You cannot say not to the suggestions we make.
  4. You cannot say no to the places we take you.
  5. You cannot say no to the gifts we shower you with.
  6. You cannot say no the first time we take your hand.
  7. You cannot say not the first time we move closer to kiss you.
  8. You cannot say no when we take you to bed.
  9. You cannot say no when we keep staying at your place.
  10. You cannot say no when we invite you to stay with us.
  11. You cannot say no when we turn up unexpectedly and invite you out for lunch or coffee.

Think back to your seduction (or if you are still inside this period consider the ongoing situation) and how readily you accede to all these requests. It is easy because there is always an upside. You cannot say no, because you do not want to say no, because you do not want to miss out on the experience of being with us and being bound closer to us. You do not realise this but we have already stolen your ability to say no. Just in the way that a totalitarian state tells you what to think, say and do, we do the same but it is all wonderful, golden and benign. This is because when we take away your capacity to say no during the seduction of the golden period we are governing you through love. This regime is as controlling as any other but is uses love to achieve governance.

What then of devaluation? How then does the theft of “no” occur?

  1. You do not say no to our demands that you run around after us.
  2. You do not say no to our command that you stay in and do not go out with your friends.
  3. You are forbidden from saying no to our demands in the bedroom, no matter how degrading and humiliating they may be.
  4. You do not say no to our sudden explosions of rage but rather you must deal with them and ride you out.
  5. You do not say not to the repeated crossing of your boundaries through our invasion of your personal space, the occupation of your accommodation, the use of your resources such as time and money.
  6. You do not say no to our coming and going as we please. We are entitled and we remove your ability to say no in order to further this sense of absolute entitlement.
  7. You do not say no to our erosion of your self-confidence, self-worth and self-esteem as we whittle them away through the repeated applications of our manipulations.
  8. You do not say not to our isolation of you, as we ensure you spend time with us and do not socialise with friends and family.
  9. You do not say no to the frequent manipulations that are applied to you, but rather you suck them up and deal with them as best as you can.

The totalitarian regime that we implement is no longer one which used love in order to govern. That has been replaced with fear. Fear of repercussions, of responses, reactions and consequences has the word no evaporate from your vocabulary. Even if you try and say it, it will not come naturally, but rather sticks in your throat until we seize it and pull it away from you once again leaving you with no option other than to say “yes”.

The theft of “no” continues even after you are discarded as well.

  1. You do not say no to our smearing of you to third parties, since you are bewildered and do not have the energy or coping mechanisms to fight back;
  2. You do not say no to our hoovering of you by saying no to our home visits, no to our telephone calls or no to our messages;
  3. You do not say no to the memories of us but rather allow them to fill your mind and continue our infection of you;
  4. You do no say no to wondering what we are doing and who with
  5. You do not say no to spying on us, trawling our social media profile and asking others about us.
  6. You do not say no to the reinstatement of the golden period.

No is denied to you repeatedly. It is taken from your lexicon of words and if you ever try to take it back, it is soon whipped away from you once again. We own your use of the word “no”. We understand the power that comes with its use and that is why we take it by any means possible. At first through the false love and then through the imposition of fear, intimidation and threat.

Why do we do this? Why do we make it our aim to remove your capacity to resist, refuse and thus say no?

  1. The word “no” is powerful. More so than “yes”. It is harder to say but when used it is powerful. We want to remove that power from you and have it ourselves.
  2. By preventing you from saying no to us we can control you and have you do what we want.
  3. Only the great have the ability to say no. We have it. Therefore, we are superior. You do not. You are therefore inferior.
  4. You know you should say it but you cannot. This damages your self-worth even further.
  5. Watching you try to say the word we have taken causes you pain, frustration, upset and anger, all of which lead to the provision of fuel.

The removal of “no” from you to us is a lynchpin in our manipulation of you. How ought you to deal with this theft? It is simple enough. Always remember where you have placed the word “no”, take it out, use it, practise with it, say it to yourself in the mirror and remember that the more you use it the harder it is for us to steal it from you and keep it from you.

11 thoughts on “The Stolen Case of No

  1. freedgypsysoul says:

    Funny word that ‘no’ is.

    Although I understand and see alot of what is meant by the use of it as explained here, in my relationship, there were times when it seemed like every reply from him began with the word ‘no’.

    Are you heading to work today? No, I’m going to work in 10 minutes.

    The sky is a pretty shade of blue. No, it’s just blue.

    Were you planning on staying after work to work on your side x side? No, I’m going to likely be late today because I’m going to run some tests on my machine.

    Would you like to go out for supper? No, but hey Chinese food would be great, do you want to go out or order in?

    Do you realize that you begin pretty much every sentence with the word ‘no’ whether or not the answer is actually ‘no’ or applies in that situation? No, that’s not true! Hmmm, ok, if you say so.

    Is your name Raymond? No, my name is Raymond.

    I’m liking ‘NO’ Contact personally 🙂 It’s been 29 days for me since I moved him out (12 of which he has contacted me). One of his messages included ‘I don’t understand why you aren’t answering your phone or coming to the door or responding back to me. I don’t know what’s going on with you but could you PLEASE call me back?’ I have the answer to that….how about a resounding HELL NO!!

  2. WriteItOut says:

    When you use “No” against a narcissist, be prepared for a huge eruption of fury. Just saying. My husband said “No” and kept to it. The moment she realized he wouldn’t be sneaking around to keep in touch and that it was a true breakup, not just something to appease me because I discovered their affair, the insanity began. Smearing on social media and to mutual friends, showing up where he worked to create a scene, texting me pictures and spewing everything she could think of to try to get me to throw him out. It hasn’t ended yet and it’s been almost three years.

    Just be prepared. Ultimately you’ve won when you say no and stick to it, and all of the vitriol directed at you is proof of that.

    Narcissists lose their minds at a hard “No”.

  3. ANM says:

    I said “No” last night, HG.
    Today is Thanksgiving in the USA. Ex-Narc would not return my child to me at the time he was supposed to, but kept saying it would be “later” and threatened me if I didn’t say “yes” to his unreasonable demands. I called a friend for help, and called the police. The Narc had to return our child as agreed upon on paper. Once that was out of the way, I got into my car to drive home with my child, turned on uplifting music, and went on with my weekend. Later, as if nothing happened, the Ex-Narc sent me videos via messanger and asked for my comments. No comment from me.
    Narc Holiday Season starts now.
    I shall give myself the gift of raising the “Hoover Bar” this holiday season.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Well done.

    2. Caroline R says:

      ANM
      Good for you!

  4. Christopher Jackson says:

    Damn all that shit is true….no!…there I said it.

  5. Leslie says:

    You and your sick thought disorders.

    The only reason this sick competition mentality exists is because of your disordered negative thinking.

  6. Veronique Jones says:

    In my past I was like this now there is no way I will be forced into anything I don’t want no has become a lot easier to me over the past three years I have faced more fears I had to to survive
    And the way you explain what was behind it all has made so much sense to me
    I have literally heard and experienced a lot of what you have said verbatim And that can’t be a coincidence

  7. Melissa says:

    NO! I will not read this!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      I see what you did there.

      1. inspire2bu says:

        Have to start somewhere.

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