The Player of Games

 

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I love playing games. As I have written before, the games are always being played. I only ever play to win otherwise there is no point. I cannot lose and sit back and smile and accept it was nevertheless an enjoyable experience because if I was to lose then it could not be enjoyable. I would be accepting that you or someone else is better than me. You are not. He is not. They are not. I always have to win. In order to achieve this I operate by a particular set of rules. You think you know what those rules are because when we first come together I deign to play by your rules; I agree to operate by the systems and conventions of your reality. That is easy for me to do because everything is going swimmingly. I am seducing you and therefore you are letting me win because it feels good. I am content to go along with the pretence of agreeing that these are the rules of engagement. You think you are winning because you are getting this wonderful, generous and loving person. In reality, I am winning because I am receiving plenty of positive fuel from you.

It is thereafter that the rules alter because I decide (and it is always my decision) that we will now abide by the rules in my reality. You are not given a rulebook and you have to guess what those rules are. As soon as you think that you have grasped them and got a handle on them, they will suddenly change. It is akin to playing a game of football and I am winning three nil. You score two more goals and you are in the ascendancy and likely to equalise. There would normally be fifteen minutes to go but suddenly I change the rules so there is just one minute left. You fail to score and I win. You protest stating that is not the correct time but it does not matter because here I am the referee, the assistants and the fourth official and what I say goes. If you do not like it, tough. I will just pick up the ball and go home with it. It is like a game of darts where you have to start from 501 and end with a double. I on the other hand start from 51 and do not need a double. You claim it is not fair but why should I care about it? I have to win. Thus, you may realise that I enjoy a lie-in on a Sunday morning so you do not disturb me. I will purposefully set the alarm early and get up waking you early. Or if I do have a lie in, I will concoct some mystery appointment that I have missed because you let me lie in. When you wake me early the following Sunday I will erupt at you for being so selfish and not letting me sleep.

When you think have ascertained what the rules are they will alter. You will do your best to try and keep up but it is exhausting and frustrating. Yet, this manipulation of the rules to allow our kind to win does not end there. Goodness me no. Our driven desire to always be the winner means that not only will we sucker you by pretending to play by your rules and then change them; we will then change the game. One moment you think you are playing Monopoly and then I am telling you it was Professor Plum in the Study with the Candlestick.

“But that is Cluedo,” you will declare rather puzzled.

“I know,” I will smile in return.

“But we are playing monopoly.

“No we are not.”

“Yes we are, look this board has streets from New York on it.”

“No it doesn’t, those are rooms in the stately home.”

“What are you talking about? See here and here, street names.”

“Are you blind? Those are snakes and ladders.”

“What? You’ve changed it again.”

“No I haven’t. You are just making a fuss because you are losing.”

“What are you on about? I am not losing, I was winning.”

“Not at all. Check mate.”

“What?”

Our phenomenal capabilities for lying, blame-shifting, denial and reflection all mean that the game will change. You are wrong footed, unsure of yourself, confused and we keep on doing it. We must win, always and you have to lose, at your cost. We will apply all our methods of manipulation to ensure we are victorious and you lie sprawled in the dirt, broken and defeated. Our success has to be at everything and I mean everything, from the trivial to the substantial, Defeat is never an option for our kind and we will bend, twist and snap the rules and alter the game in order to achieve this. Now, let’s play a game. It is my favourite. You may know it. It is called Guess Who? You have no chance.

14 thoughts on “The Player of Games

  1. honestyrocks777 says:

    I did submit a comment to this. I’ve been screen shotting all my comments because I dont see many of them. I did the EDC. Then was told I submitting too many words. So upon my car being in shop for electrical problems I dont know when I can pay to actually get my results.

    So then I am hearing two different things. 1 in 6 is narcissists. And 6%.

    Also I read someone about 17%. So then all this is in the EDC? Where can I read more about this?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Your comments are in moderation along with many others.

      It is 1 in 6.

    2. lisk says:

      honestyrocks777,

      RE: EDC

      Are you able to cut the words down so that HG can assess and assist you sooner?

      I’ve only done phone consults with HG so far, but I know you don’t need to give every single detail for HG to pinpoint what’s going on (or, in this case, to determine what you are).

      I would highly suggest revising your previous submission so that you can get clarity.

    3. Lorelei says:

      Narcissists=16-17% basically. Empaths 25%. Narcissistic under 10% is my guess, but the rest normals which would encompass just over 50%. Scale back your words, it shouldn’t be needed. I have done the empath detector and two narc detectors with no overage and am satisfied with the results.

  2. honestyrocks777 says:

    Question,

    If narcissists are 6%. How could I have been with them my whole life? It was something my therapist brought up and a topic coming in in reading about the odds of being with a narc being so slim.

    Even if there is claim.that those being infatuated are actually with narcs…those are high numbers… seemingly well over 6%

    Any thoughts?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      1. It’s higher than 6%
      2. Do the EDC and it will also answer your question.

      1. honestyrocks777 says:

        I plan on it but car went to the shop for a parasitic draw :/ smh have no clue what that will look like besides the big ole cha ching.. lol. See this kind of BS makes me want my $400 back from nick and to reach out.. ugh. Are you well HG?

        Our conversation didnt record or keep and skype says its lost.. smh all that information I dont remember 🙁

    2. Lorelei says:

      Honesty— HG has said 1/6 are narcissists. I believe 25% empaths and that leaves still over half as normal or normal/narcissistic. I don’t believe all empaths are as susceptible to narcissistic seduction depending on their background. I’ve not heard HG say this directly, but I know empaths that were raised with better boundary formation. I didn’t have a shot with my family dynamic really. We looked normal but it was anything but. Do indeed do the EDC. I would have lost a lot of insights had I not done it. I don’t actually view the empathic disposition as a strength. I’m disappointed it is as it is because the normals don’t have these issues. I resent it quite often, but I’m improving in some areas. I feel “less bad” when I’m an ass. (Normals don’t deluge with guilt in the same way) I pissed off a cousin. She wanted me to call and apologize and I didn’t feel it was necessary. I have zero guilt and her fussy fit which led to deleting me off FB was not a problem. I, in fact, deleted a few people that offer no value to my life recently. I don’t even dislike them—I just don’t want them around. I pissed off a co-worker. Zero guilt because I don’t have to always feel bad when I express something that isn’t popular. I’m working more on me than “the narcissist” at this point. I don’t know it that makes sense but yes, do the EDC because it will guide you tremendously.

      1. Alexissmith2016 says:

        Not to forget the empathic but not empaths Lorelei. I have a few of those as friends too. I don’t mind the narcissistic but not Ns either. They can be a bit selfish but now I understand them I accept what I can and cannot expect from them as a friend and it helps tremendously.

        1. Lorelei says:

          I had a boss that was narcissistic but not a narcissist from what I can see. She was (is) quite successful, but not abusive and her life is solid. She hugged me when I left and it was awkward because she is not a hugger. It was right after my daughter’s father died and I left admin work to be available more to the kids. This was five years ago and my decline was in full swing. I actually really like her, but she’s not a person I stay in touch with routinely. Alexis—have you done any planting outside? Are you a flower/vegetable/plant person? I have a really nice wooden pallet I’m about to Pinterest for ideas. There are tons of things people do with pallets. I’m also reading a copy of Jane Austen’s, Pride and Prejudice. I had never read it before and feel dumb for not doing so. My daughter collects classics and this was on her shelf so I borrowed it.

      2. honestyrocks777 says:

        I have days were I just LOVE who I am. I know my heart is huge. And I see my ability to feel and understate as a positive. It brings color to a lot of things. Then there are days where I feel like it’s a curse.. lol. Generally when I feel the bad feelings. But thankfully.. I am feeling. And because I can feel the bad… I know when things are really good. Ying yang. Life can be beautiful. People beautiful. And what is even better is when we decide to grow intentionally and work on our motivations. For me.. beauty is integrity, pureness, good character, doing what’s right even if it’s hard. I need to convince myself of that again.

        I rock because I try. I dont settle for the easy road. I work for the right road. There is so much more power and energy in doing it that way. Its freeing.

        But of course, we all have different roads. Different things to learn.

  3. Sweetest Perfection says:

    3-D chess, uh?

    1. Lorelei says:

      I really just love Monopoly. My father really encouraged it by printing me off really cool Monopoly money to use with my friend, and he also insisted on croquet in our botanical garden yard he created for people from all over to come marvel at/be in awe of, etc. He then would provide a bottle of his wine he made from cultivating the earth with succulent grapes. He would then discuss his coin or gun collection. He had 200 firearms at one time. And then the game of checkers would commence—never chess.

    2. zwartbolleke says:

      Hahaha…if only we knew earlier!

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