20 Million – 20 For 20 (Part Two)
20 million hits for Knowing the Narcissist
A short time ago, Knowing the Narcissist achieved 20 million hits.
To celebrate this milestone and to thank you all for your involvement in the creation of the world’s number one resource for understanding narcissism for this weekend only you will access to The 20 For 20.
Unveiled in two parts, you will have access to a range of products and services for the outrageously low price of US $ 20.
This is Part Two of The 20 for 20.
20 Things That Infuriate the Narcissist
20 Things HG Loves/20 Things HG Hates
20 Ways To Delete the Narcissist
The Addiction : Double Package
97 thoughts on “20 Million – 20 For 20 (Part Two)”
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Congratulations Mr. Tudor! This was extremely generous of you. I couldn’t pass up the deal and purchased some bundles. I’ve been listening and reading since Sunday. Thank you!
Thank you and you’re welcome
Congratulations h.g. you deserve it all
THANKS LIC,TOMORROW. SO HOW YOU DOING ? HOPE YOUR PUTTING THOSE RELAXING TECHNICAL IDEAS TO USE THAT I TYPED OUT . ALL OF US HERE THAT HAVE BEEN NEARLY DESTROYED BY THE NARCISSISTS WE’VE HAD THE MISFORTUNE TO MEET ., WE KNOW HOW TO MAKE OUR OWN LIFE BETTER, WE AS NON NARCISSISTIC ONES HAVE A CONSCIENCE HOPEFULLY THAT HASN’T BEEN SHUT OFF BY THE NARCISSISTS. AND THAT CONSCIENCE. HAS NEVER FAILED TO LET ME KNOW WHO REALLY IS IN CHARGE OF MY LIFE .NEVER WANTS TO PUT ME DOWN AND WHEN I’M DOWN NEVER KEEPS ME THERE FOR LONG . TALKS TO ME EVERYDAY ALWAYS POSITIVE , RECOGNISES MY KINDNESS AND LOVES ME ALWAYS. NO GAMES EVER .NO MAN NO HUMAN CAN DUE THIS , I HAVE A CONSCIENCE SO THATS THE DIFFERENCE. ENJOY YOUR DAY DEAR
Hi Smarinucci 🙂 Thank you for asking, and I am a little bit perturbed today after getting a ‘check in’ or ‘how are you msg’ from a potential lieutenant of my narc. I read these things as I see them, view it as an information seeking excercise, and am currently considering how to respond. Whether to respond. I could be polite and give ’em nothing, I could be ‘rude’ and ignore them. I could put myself first and resist the temptation. The lieutenant has found a side door I was unable to close. I am ‘thinking’ mode right now about what to do next. Though I don’t feel overly pressured.
And it sounds like you are learning to trust yourself and your own instincts a lot more, Sharon. That is a real bonus. Gives you the ability to bounce back when needed. Thanks for the reminder around that. We all have it in us, we just need to take hold of it.
Have a great day, too, Sharon <3 xox
The best thing is most likely not to reply. Because if you do it is a way of breaking no contact. Unfortunately you will lose a lot of people once you escape the narc. They will be people you thought were close to you. There is a guy like that who was the best man at my wedding and a “friend” of my ex-husband since high school. He’s a pretty nice guy but has done a few things that make me know he stands firmly on the narc’s side. You always feel like you are getting somewhere with your explanations, like they are going to see something they have not already seen. Unfortunately that is just your emotional thinking. I think I have gotten a lot better, I still have emotional thinking but for the most part I do not act on it. That’s a big dividing line and step and you will know once you’ve taken it.
Hi Gina, thanks so much for you comment. I’ve been on that ‘let’s try and get others to understand that person is a narc’ bandwagon and to be honest, until they’ve been bitten by the narc, they’re unlikely to see it. Firstly, most people don’t even recognize narcissism as a real thing, and secondly narcs are good at hiding in plain sight (they’ve got it covered with the facade). Thanks for the reminder about emotional thinking.
The contact took me straight back to a place of maximum impact. On one hand, I think this person is unwittingly allowing themselves to be used. Once upon a time, I wouldn’t have thought that. Now I think differently. We had some important things in common. Just goes to show how insidious the whole narcissistic thing is. Even those things which should have formed a barrier have not prevented this person from being drawn in by the narcissist. Even so, it has become clear to me in the period prior to my ‘escape’ this person was behaving oddly and seemingly more in league with the narcissist, and in the intervening months since then has not attempted to make contact. That last is the strangest thing of all, but not so strange if I put it together with the narc. If she got swept up in the smear campaign then it makes sense. Which is why I see this as nothing more than a fishing exercise. She is dropping a hook into the water to see if I will bite. Normally, as an empath and generally a polite person, I would respond to someone touching base with me. Especially someone who I know is another empath, and not the narc himself. Unfortunately for her, this time round, I choose not the drink of the poison chalice she is offering me. Even such minimal contact as a polite response is likely to push the door open further for the narc to potentially step back in. And if it’s just a random check in from a friend who I haven’t heard from in a while (on the off chance I’ve read the whole thing wrong), well, she didn’t bother to check in with me before now with all that has happened, so I doubt she is really concerned about me at all.
The one thing that happened after this last involvement with a narcissist is I now trust fewer people and am guarded against many. There is no other way.
You might want to just block her. From what you’ve said
LET:
Any possibility this person could be one of the narc’s Lieutenants?
Dearest lickemtomorrow,
If I receive text msgs from randoms long ago, particularly no id caller, I delete
“Hiiiii, long time no hear” (no name given)
If you’re not present in my life right now, you can bugga off ! (same goes for Christmas cards) I don’t think about it, I just do
I expect manners n courtesy, if you cannot identify yourself, you’re no friend of mine
I don’t play guessing games anymore, stuff that ! I’m not the same person I was 5 minutes ago 😂
I’ve learnt get rid off everything that doesn’t give me joy 🤣
Good luck precious
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Hi Bubbles 🙂
I’m with you on this one, and thanks for your thoughts x
I have not responded and don’t feel bad about it either.
As empaths, guilt plays a huge part in our dynamic and we fall victim to it time and time again. We are thoughtful people who don’t want to hurt others, so we try to avoid doing that at all costs … often to our detriment. I’m learning that others do not always have my best interests at heart even when they give the appearance of doing so.
For this person to withhold their concern until now tells me their interest isn’t sincere. That’s how I read it. So, what could be the reason for their interest now?
There’s only one reason. The narcissist. And an opportunity for thought fuel.
I’m not going to give him that.
The message must have gone out loud and clear, to her at least, because she hasn’t tried to touch base since. It was a side door which I will now need to look at closing.
I don’t know how many people I’ve had to cut out of my life because of the narc/s.
Dearest lickemtomorrow,
I agree with all you have said
The thing is not to feel bad about it, it’s really easy when you start, they soon get the hint 😉
I used to be the first cab of the ranks, to send out Christmas cards, all the recipients over the years probably thought “damn, now I have to send you one”
Over the past few of years I’ve not bothered being the first contact from me
Guess what, not one of those “so called friends” bothered to sent us one
They are permanently off my Christmas list now
Luv Bubbles xx 😘
Congratulations HG (and I apologize for not saying so earlier…I suppose I was giddy over all you were offering in celebration!)
I purchased 40 minutes of your time, and look forward to receiving your reading as well as input. I highly recommend to other readers although I’m sure most of us already know the great value you’ve offered.
I also purchased your loves and likes. Brilliant–I’ve already made note of several of your loves to look up later. As for your hates….wow. My agreement on so many gave me the pleasure of nodding snickers to honest belly laughs. Especially, but not limited to #s 11, 15 and 17. Also highly recommend to those hesitating on the fence. Jump, ffs. Buy it! You won’t regret it! They are wonderful and worth every penny.
Thank you, HG for all the work that you do, and again, congratulations on 20 million hits.
You are most welcome.
Congratulations HG🥂! Such a shining milestone💫!
I won’t miss 20 Tudor minutes!
Thank you for the generous gifts !
Thank you Claire
Congratulations HG! Well deserved!! I very much enjoyed 20 things HG loves \ hate. Very entertaining!
Thank you CM.
The hate list I believe would be full of entertaining things… but the Love list… what does that go like for a narc?
Residual Benefits, Character Traits, Fuel, Fuel, Fuel, Fuel…..
Haha!
When I click on the ‘I want this’ option, it blinks and doesn’t let me purchase.
Refresh and try it again. It worked for me after I did that
@violetta.
Ok, thank you.
Geminimom:
Has it worked? If there are problems, you can ask HG about a workaround.
@violetta,
Yes, it worked. Thank you.
Geminimom:
You’re welcome.
Congrats HG.! Fantastic achievement for a superlative resource!
Thank you J and L
I’m in for the 20 mins of Tudor time. Not sure how I’ll use it yet, but I guess if I need it there will be 20 mins more 🙂
You may wish to stock up, this deal is for the weekend and then it is gone.
Good to know! Let me clear a little storage space and raid my bank account for the (?)third time this week to ensure I don’t miss out 🙂
(PS: it really is a bargain, and one I know I’m going to enjoy – kudos to you again, HG.)
Well, I was waiting to be inspired, but I’m already locked and loaded.
Today I need a hero.
LICKEMTOMORROW. good morning , just read your reply .You’re always very uplifting to me , about my latest medical thing about my thoughts and such .You even gave me ( LIKED ) WHEN I Congratulated h.g. on his 20 million mark . But the one I was speaking to would not , certainly it hurt me , after the NARCISSTS in my whole life , the one that mattered Now. Everyone else got the usual thank you ‘s but for the world to see zero. It did sting yes as it should , when you have a great education, well read , ” elite. ” one would hope for better. BUT, as he has TAUGHT us here about his exgirlfriends and their loving ways and such. How he enjoyed watching their pain and suffering & how they never. change I must remember, all narc’s. really do dislike the true empath natured ones how UNFORTUNATE for them because we are their true friends , we can teach them so much about the world and themselves . Even when they teach us so much evil .I just lost more respect ,again that’s all . Now we wait for the excuses or follow up lieutenants or disciples as hg. Taught us about . What a shame . When there is no conscience there really is no sincerity HG. TUDOR TEACHES EVEN THROUGH SOMETHING AS SMALL AND UNIMPORTANT AS THIS .
Hi Smarinucci, thank you for your kind words. They mean a lot to me. Especially after you have been through so much. Somehow you still find a way to give back to others. Your kindness and appreciation is returned <3
I'm not sure if you're saying HG hurt you here, but I read you loud and clear on how the narcissist's in our life seem to set out to hurt us. And they find multiple ways to do that.
What HG has taught me so far is their ability to do this, even unbeknownst to themselves. While so much of it seems calculated, so much of it is actually 'wired' into them … otherwise they wouldn't all be so similar in nature. And the fact it is wired in is the reason to stay away.
We are the ones who can change and the ones who can develop an awareness as empaths. So, unfortunately, the responsibility in that sense falls back on us. We see it as their loss. They don't see it the same way. I think that is the hardest thing to understand.
While we long to give, heal, reform, love and all from the sincerity of our own hearts, it is not possible for them to receive. So, it will always be turned back on us, to the point where we are the ones needing the healing.
Thankfully, we have eachother for that, and HG to give us the insight to learn from our 'mistakes'.
I am very grateful to have found the opportunity to learn here. It is painful, but necessary.
I do hope you are doing OK right now, and sending healing thoughts your way again today <3
HG
20 Things HG Loves/20 Things HG hates (Right Now) was fucking brilliant! It feels so good to hate doesn’t it. I love a good rant.
Glad you enjoyed it K
Thank you, K. I cannot purchase all of them, and was having trouble choosing. You sold me on this one.
My pleasure lisk
You won’t be disappointed. 20 Things That Infuriate the Narcissist was excellent, as well.
So, I am not disappointed at all, K.
I love how HG saves the best for last, and his passionate hatred is quite invigorating and so relatable in many instances. I especially love the fist bangs on the desk—they kind of remind me of my passionate people.
As for the things HG loves, I don’t relate to all of them but I’m definitely getting myself some of Lapis Lazuli kind of I-don’t-remember-what-number-it-is.
lisk
I am very happy to read that you weren’t disappointed.
His passion is fantastic and the bangs really emphasized it. I can only imagine what he would look like if he were really pissed off/furious.
The loves were pretty cool and I did a quick Google search for the Lapis Lazuli; I haven’t checked out the bots yet. I am going to listen again tonight.
I fear knowing too much. HG probably hates most things I love. Does he hate cats? No!!!
Bibi
Hahahaha…he does not hate cats! MB is right; we have many hates in common. The lollipops and soap looked beautiful (painted white) and I wasn’t fond of the sitcom either (painted black). If you get it, you won’t be disappointed!
20 famous Narcs – No3 boohooohooooo Gutted about this one. Truly.
Thank you for avoiding spoilers.
Congratulations HG!!!
Thank you Feather
Now you have got me curious, alexissmith2016!
Loved it. You sound so domesticated with your grass cutter, floor cleaner and knife sharpener.
BUT Kim e hates when HG mentions his hatred for James Cordon and then says good bye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I love Christopher Hitchens !
The Hitch!
Yes, the Hitch!
And the international space station! I stood in the garden of the Scottish friends I was visiting last July, as we watched it pass over the town where they live there, sipping excellent whisky. A fond memory.
Is he one? I enjoy his views on religion, even though I read Thomas Merton.
Did I see that there are new clues in the clue hunter package? If purchased previously do we also get the new clues?
Not in the Clue Hunter package SW, the other new packages. They’re not obvious but they are there and Team Forensic will pick them up, of that I’m sure.
Cue Z. I’m behind on my clue hunting lately..
Congratulations HG. You’ve helped me tremendously.
You’re welcome and thank you Gina
Where’s part one? Been off for a bit
The post above!
Some of these are brand new offerings, correct? I’m not referring to the bundles.
Yes there are 6 new items
I’ve done this bass-ackwards, having started with SATC, Sitting Target, some logic bulletins, and KHG. Never read Fuel or Fury. Will it be mostly material I’ve gleaned from context in other articles, or is it advisable to go over the basics, since I unintentionally skipped a step or two?
PS I guess HG doesn’t like Blur. Mine are the only congrats that went unanswered. 😢
I often speed read to aid moderation and a lot of your posts are lyrics or text from plays and novels , this meant I missed your congratulations as it did not sit alone but was with lyrics. Thank you for the congratulations Violetta.
😊
So do I need Fuel and Fury for the basics, or may I proceed from the Advanced Beginner level?
You do, they’re essential.
Going for bundle 3 in the KTN candy store then.
I know a guy who’s tough but sweet
He’s so fine, he can’t be beat
He’s got everything that I desire
Sets the summer sun on fire
I want candy
I want candy
Just started. OMG, you weren’t kidding.
I never really grasped that what is pleasant to most people, for instance, praise or popularity, is essential to others. I might be disappointed if I don’t get either, but I don’t spend every minute of every day making decisions based on what other people will think of something.
And yet, that’s not only what my narcs were doing, but it’s what they were trying to get me to do! Wannabe Playuh-Narc wanted me to worry constantly about what his mood of the day would be, far beyond the standard “I wonder if he’ll like this outfit on me?” My 2nd reader not only wanted me to shape my prose in her image, but to have the social life she would approve of, even though she actually avoided her own colleagues to the point of living in a suburb far from the local faculty enclave.
And while they don’t want to be associated with a loser, God help anyone who looks able to surpass them. Even when you’re not competing, they are.
Violetta
Praise/recognition is fuel and you are there to support their reality so you better put up (the Prime Aims) or else and God forbid you are smarter, faster, funnier or better looking than the narcissist (cue the pathological jealousy); they will go behind your back (indirect control) and smear you left, right and center and get you fired or ousted (control asserted).
Everyone is competition in NarcLand.
K:
I now realize:
A) though I felt guilty about envying my Jr. High Frenemy, that’s the only reason she kept me around;
B) there are at least two people (probably more, once I start identifying them) who had grudges against me because I didn’t envy them. What’s the point of having wonderful possessions/achievements if other people don’t give a fuck?
I would also highly recommend “Confessions of a Narcissist.” An early one after the series of two fictional books HG wrote. It’s fascinating. I tried to read his books chronologically.
Stronger Wendy:
Thanks, will look into.
I’ve just bought this one, so good to see the recommendation.
I’ve also got no idea where to start and where to finish as far as all the material goes. Some would be helpful to read in a chronological order, but I do find most of HGs work is ‘stand alone’. Thankfully we get some direction here on where to go depending on our circumstances and that is one really helpful aspect of this site.
Yes, the books stand alone. For me it’s more about organizing information so I can determine how I want tackle it.
What I’d give for a weekly commentary done by HG of current events. The 20 hates had me literally LOL! We have many hates in common it turns out. Thank you for that most enjoyable recording, HG!
Glad you enjoyed it – at least you’ve used LOL appropriately!
I don’t like it. You will not see me use it. I was being cheeky! Ha ha
I prefer ha ha myself as well!
I’m all about the lol… it just lightens the tone of the message as many people tend to not interpret text message properly and can’t pick up on sarcasm or humour very easily.
Haha is also good to convey tone. However Ha ha (when seperate) is interpreted as a slow hollow laugh… I read that as “not funny” or “not amused”
People need to not be so damn sensitive, NLOL.
I agree that often sarcasm is missed. I have a very dry sense of humor myself and I’m often sarcastic and people just don’t realize.
I prefer “ha ha” to lol because I grew up using Ha ha.
I’m sure I’m one of those who don’t use lol appropriately but thankfully I’m at the point now where I don’t care anymore. I’m closer to being like the honey badger. Will never have to worry about not being hated anymore lol.
Congrats HG!!!! Off to the boxed wine store to make my listening more pleasurable.
Thank you Kim E
20 minutes of Tudor Time?? Priceless!!!
You’d think so, but just US $ 20. – I’m cutting my own throat here!
The 20 Tudor Minutes is a fantastic idea!
I’d pay $20 to see what people ask you to do for ’20 Tudor Minutes’
Go ahead!
I’m going to pay the 20 bucks just to have him say my name for 20 mins. Then 20 more to tell me how wonderful I am. I’m certain he’ll charge more or outright refuse to say for 20 mins that he wishes he could BE me haha.
You put your money where your ego is and I’ll deliver!
NA, haha I was thinking the same thing. The first time I heard him say my real name I got so distracted I had to start the audio consult over…twice.
Haha – right?!
What glorious surprises! You’ve made my week, HG!
You’re welcome. Time for people to fill their boots there’s some choice material in there and the Clue Hunters will find new leads there.
Congratulations!! 🥂
Thank you Ashley
THIS IS SO TEMPTING, I’D SOOOO LOVE TO HAVE MY NO CONTACT NARC TORTURER BOUND WITH SILK TIES FORCED TO LISTEN TO EVERY ONE OF YOUR TAPES IN MY BIG BEAUTIFUL QUEENSIZE VICTORIAN ANTIQUE BED AND TAPDANCE NAKED ON THE SEALING PUNISHMENT FOR HIM THRILLING FOR ME. CONGRATULATIONS H.G. & THANKS FOR EVERYTHING