Interview : Pink Pill Channel

 

 

I was interviewed on 16th April by Chris of the Pink Pill channel, to listen click there link below

Access interview here

105 thoughts on “Interview : Pink Pill Channel

  1. NarcAngel says:

    Off the top of my head, when I think of HG experiencing power, I picture him feeling electrified and and invincible to achieve a successful outcome for himself with little or no thought to consequence for others (save keeping the facade intact). When I think of empaths feeling powerful, I think of them as having the feeling of harnessing all that is good in themselves in order to be able to share it with others for a successful outcome for all.

    1. lickemtomorrow says:

      I really like your take on this one, NA 🙂 It’s simple and to the point, and I have to agree with how you imagine HG feels – electrified and invincible. I used the word infallible, but invincible is much better. And I like the idea of us as empaths ‘harnessing’ all that is good in ourselves making us able to share that with others. The difference is how we utilize that feeling of power, as you say HG is achieving the outcomes for himself, while we achieve the outcome for others. In this instance, both can be seen to be adding to the greater good.

  2. TheVimtoSlut says:

    Interesting reading all the comments.

    Interview from Hgs’ end was polished as always. The problem was with the interviewer really.

    Frankly, I found the first section, the intro really, as irritating. I guess I wasn’t really warming to her then!

    I also noted a tendency to not really be able to think on her feet. It was quite startling in a few places actually. A good interviewer should have a general list of questions in addition to getting the interviewee to expand on the central thurst of the narrative. In this case fuel, schools, cadre etc

    Where this fell down was when the interviewer asked Hg an open ended question which may then have potentially led to more insightful and educational comments from him. All we got from her was, ‘uh oh’. A few times.

    Now I don’t really know what was behind that except she could chat quite happily at times which tends to suggest she wasn’t nervous.

    The lady did almost pull it back with the funeral story but was it appropriate considering she was the interviewer? Someone has suggested that it wasn’t appropriate. At that time I wasn’t sure considering the nature of the subject but on reflection, you do not catch top flight interviewers ever revealling anything of themselves apart from an odd, throwaway comment.

    I guess radio and Internet lends itself more to ‘cult of personality’, i just think the balance wasn’t quite there.

    The voice changer bit was good though!

  3. C says:

    I really appreciate the effort you put into this interview… or not even an interview, it was a discussion. Very engaging. I listen to TPP sometimes and it’s a community of women who REALLY need to learn more about narcissism, so your voice is very needed. Thanks.

  4. JB says:

    I really enjoyed this too, HG. It does make me wonder though, when you say about unaware narcissists who think they genuinely feel certain things but in fact are not, how do we ever know if what any of us feel is real?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Genuine, not real.

      1. JB says:

        What’s the difference, HG?

        1. HG Tudor says:

          What’s the difference with regard to what? (I do not see the previous comment in the moderation pane so you have to be specific)

          1. JB says:

            I said “It does make me wonder though, when you say about unaware narcissists who think they genuinely feel certain things but in fact are not, how do we ever know if what any of us feel is real?”, to which you replied, “Genuine, not real.” I wanted to know what the difference was ?

          2. HG Tudor says:

            Two handbags. They are both real because you are not imagining them. One is counterfeit therefore the other is genuine. Real and genuine are different.

          3. A Victor says:

            Well, I am glad HG spoke to that, I think I will need to cement that concept down even further, it is confusing, for me, taking it from inanimate objects to people, feelings and behaviors.

          4. JB says:

            Ah ok, I understand. So, to rephrase..how do any of us ever actually know that what we feel is genuine?

            Narcissists (most) believe that what they feel is genuine, as do non narcissists. So who is right? I say I love someone and it means something specific to me, in terms of how that should be shown (both by myself and the person I love). A non aware narcissist may genuinely think they love someone, yet the way in which they act appears to contradict this, to non narcissists’ minds, anyway! So we say ‘narcissists are incapable of love’ etc, but equally a non aware narcissist disengaging may well believe that they are doing so because their partner doesn’t love them the way they want. They both believe that they are in love, but both people think that the other can’t really be in love, because they aren’t being treated the way they feel they should be treated. How can we actually say ‘No, that isn’t love, this is’, etc, etc? Who decides?

          5. A Victor says:

            JB, I have a feeling we might hear perspective, perspective, perspective here…

          6. Leigh says:

            JB, I’m going to use my own experience to explain why I know they aren’t capable of love. My husband and I have been together for over 35 years (married for 25 years). Last summer, he threw something at my head. (This was the catalyst that made me realize he is a narcissist.) I had said something about wishing I had furthered my education and that wounded him. He decided to throw something at my head to abate his fury. This man will tell you he loves me. He will tell you that I’m the great love of his life. Yet, he throws something at my head. I can’t do that to someone I don’t like, let alone someone I love. We don’t need to hurt other people in order to make ourselves feel better. They do. I agree with TS, they feel powerful and in control, not happiness.

            Have you listened to Mr. Tudor’s video, Cognitive Dissonance and Emotional Thinking? It might help. I think your emotional thinking may be blurring the lines for you.

          7. Truthseeker6157 says:

            JB,

            That’s a really good question. I agree with you. Who decides?

            I think the overarching concept is that happiness is a matter of perspective. Our perspective falls in line with the majority perspective. Therefore our perspective is ‘right’ or ‘normal’. We might not entirely agree on how our happiness originates, but we agree roughly on how it feels, at least within the range of language that we have at our disposal to express it.

            Happiness to the narc is linked to power and control. I think lines become blurry when both groups describe positive fuel versus happiness or, happiness versus power. We are very much in agreement though that we as empaths do not experience happiness through controlling, manipulating or devaluing another person. Narcissists do. Unaware narcissists that are well fuelled ( positive OR negative fuel) would describe that feeling as happiness or similar. The fact is, it can’t be. Not from the majority perspective.

            Therefore by default, narcissists don’t feel happy. They feel powerful through being fuelled. Their ‘happy’ does not fit with the majority perspective. The world operates from our perspective and not theirs. This does not make either group ‘right’ in my view. It just highlights differences in perspective.

          8. JB says:

            AV, TS, Leigh,

            Yes it does seem it is all a matter of perspective, and I guess majority perspective is what determines our definitions of concepts such as love.

            Leigh, I haven’t seen that video, but it sounds interesting, I will take a look!

        2. A Victor says:

          JB, I always think of genuine as being related to feelings and real being related to facts. We and the narcissist can have very genuine feelings, based on nothing logical. But to have real facts come into play, sometimes proves the genuine to be based on something not real and therefore, fake or false. But it can feel very genuine at the same time. I believe my ex had genuine feelings of “love” for me but they were shown to be fake by his real actions toward me. If this is incorrect, I hope HG will explain it as I confuse these also and have had to give this thought on more than one occasion.

          1. JB says:

            AV, I’m still thinking now! My head’s screwed at the moment! 😂 Probably due to having next to no sleep over the past few months!

          2. A Victor says:

            Think away! I understand, I am tired recently also, on the verge of a breakthrough, I think…
            Good luck with your thoughts and try to get some rest. 🙂

          3. JB says:

            AV, I hope you are able to get some rest as well. Thoughts a bit all over the place at the moment. One of my best friends passed away recently and it’s really thrown me. Made me wonder what it’s all about x

          4. A Victor says:

            JB, I am so sorry to hear about your friend. I wish there was a way to take a person’s pain away at these times. Words seem so meaningless yet it’s all we have. I am hurting for you and sending a hug. ❤

          5. Leigh says:

            JB, I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. I’m sending you a virtual hug. I hope you find the answers you need.

          6. JB says:

            AV, thank you xx

          7. JB says:

            Leigh, thank you xx

    2. A Victor says:

      JB, your question was at the heart of a conversation I had with my son last night. He absolutely could not accept that narcissists don’t feel/experience positive emotions. And how do we know that HG’s fuel “washing over” him is different from our rush of happiness? I’m not disputing it, I just have to know how to explain it better. I’ve been looking at happiness hormones today, for an answer and have found they really need to study the narcissistic biochemical makeup more, there seems not tp be a lot of info out there about it.

      1. JB says:

        AV, I completely agree with you!

        1. Violetta says:

          One rocker (Keith Richards, I think) said that heroin is like having spent all your life in a cold room and walking into a warm room. So Narcissists themselves wouldn’t necessarily know they were missing out on anything. It’s like me finding out that not everyone hates stereograph viewers or “Magic Eye” because why would I want to see two of everything? before it turned out my eyes don’t focus together enough to give me a 3-D image. How would you know it isn’t normal if it’s all you know?

          Speaking of the thrill of opioids, the few times I’ve had them for medical procedures, they relieved pain and anxiety, but I wasn’t particularly eager to repeat the experience. Tried cocaine a few times years ago, hated it. Liked drinking and weed as a teen, but I don’t miss the second, and I can do without the first when I’m on some kind of medication that might have an interaction. It’s not like Yorkshire Tea, which has occasionally eased thoughts of suicide.

          It’s well-established that people respond to different things and develop different addictions, so the biochemical and neurological aspects of Narcissism absolutely demand study.

          1. A Victor says:

            Violetta, “How would you know it isn’t normal if it’s all you know?” – this is the crux of what my son was saying, exactly this. And, whatever label anyone puts on it means whatever they understand it to mean. I believe HG when he says narcissists experience what he says they do, but I’ve lived up close and personal to several all my life, my son hasn’t so I think it’s harder for him to accept it. I hope more research is being done, it is such a large group of people and they affect so many more. But I suppose not many would go for any testing.

          2. TheVimtoSlut says:

            Violetta

            Extremely interesting and dare I say it, perceptive comments about ‘magic eye’ pictures.

            You see, I could never see them. I remember when they were all the rage, buying one and staring, and staring and…staring. just couldn’t see it.

            Then I guess I was told or read ‘the trick’. Place the picture on a flat surface, (in this case my windowsill), put a sheet of glass on top. Then move your head starting at parallel to the picture, head on side then slowly moving it up to 90 degrees. I found you don’t get that far before you see it.

            Once I removed the glass I could still see it.

            Its funny. I come from a ‘nest of narcs’. They didn’t need the glass trick but I did.

            Makes you think.

          3. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Violetta,

            I don’t mean to dumb down the conversation, but, ha ha! Fully with you on any type of drug. Drugs and me don’t get along usually. I got my COVID jab the other week. Sick as a dog for over a week. That really annoyed me. I’m rarely sick but a jab I likely didn’t need and will be ineffective by the end of the year lost me a week. Weed, first time I got completely lost in a corridor (which obviously is straight) couldn’t find my room, I was two doors away but kept turning round and going the wrong way down the numbers. Second time I got stuck on the couch. Couldn’t get off it. I was watching someone make cheese on toast and thought, “ If he wanted to kill me now, I couldn’t move to do anything about it.” Weed only works for me when I mix with alcohol, which you aren’t supposed to do. Works for me. I have a merry old time then! I hallucinate off steroids too. They gave me those for a cough once. Bad idea, I watched a wash stand dance. I dread to think what I’d be like on cocaine!
            Interesting what you said about the vision. There’s something I can’t see either, to do with depth I think. I was told I couldn’t be a fighter pilot, which was disappointing.

            Yorkshire Tea is the elixir of the gods.

      2. Asp Emp says:

        AV, RE: your words “they really need to study the narcissistic biochemical makeup more, there seems not to be a lot of info out there about it” – your words in relation to ’emotions’ – may I suggest that you ask your son to type in “conditions associated with lack of empathy” into internet search – this can give various examples and explanations. I mentioned ‘alexithymia’ previously on this blog.

        There are many reasons why people’s ‘biochemical make-ups’ vary – genetic, environmental (even cultures vary in different countries, where people do things differently) – it’s also DNA related. Another example can be ie a car accident can lead to different ‘biochemical make-up’ (shock, trauma, brain damage, etc – sometimes linked to the adrenal glands and can change the body’s natural / original biochemicals) – lots of reasons. Scientists tend to ‘clump’ certain ‘biochemical make-ups’ into groups = names of “conditions”. The work has been done. BUT it is still lack of understanding (awareness) around narcissism – hence HG doing his work.

        Imagine, if you will, something you had been trying to achieve and then you do ie passing a driving test, or passing an important exam, or an overwhelming feeling of intense anger – stop and think how these ‘achievements’ make you feel / think. You achieve something = success = feel good.

        From your perspective as someone with emotional and cognitive empathy would be similar to the receipt of ‘fuel’ (whether negative or positive) for someone with narcissism. However, an unaware narcissist may say they ‘feel’ happy / joy but they don’t really ‘feel’ it in the same way as empaths do – normals do have these emotions, yet, not as ‘potent’ as an empath.

        Show your son HG’s article – link attached – if you re-read our comments on it…….

        https://narcsite.com/2021/02/25/what-fuel-feels-like-to-a-narcissist-9/

        HG’s book ‘Fuel’ explains it very well too.

        1. A Victor says:

          Thank you Asp Emp, much to consider and study here. I had no idea about some of the more scientific or medical aspects that you bring up. Thank you very much! It will help, both he and myself. I was thinking today that because he has never had close up and personal interactions with a narcissist, he is where I would’ve been prior to the summer narc coming along. I think he did have such interaction with one but he hasn’t put it together yet. Maybe someday. Anyway, thank you!

          1. Asp Emp says:

            Thank you AV 🙂

      3. Leigh says:

        AV & JB, maybe fuel does feel like happiness. I think the difference is how happiness manifests in us vs. the narcissist. I think for us, happiness comes from within. With the narcissist, they need it from someone else. They have to hurt and use people to get it. They are empty, we are not.

        How do we know our feelings are genuine? I think its because we don’t have to hurt or use someone in order to feel those feelings. The narcissist does. They will do anything to create an emotional response from us. We don’t do those kinds of things.

        1. A Victor says:

          Wow Leigh, that makes so much sense!! Thank you! I will explain that to my son if/when it comes up again. You also have a better grasp on that genuine vs real concept, I really struggle with that for some reason. I think because, for me, my marriage and my feelings were real, coming from that place in me, they were also genuine. I will work it out, sometimes it just takes having it presented in a certain way for something to click. Just not yet. Thank you!

          1. Leigh says:

            I read and read and then read some more.

            Even hurting someone, making them cry or angry gives them fuel and makes them feel good or happy. In fact, that negative fuel is the best they can get. They hurt someone and they feel good. Thats how I know its not genuine. When I hurt someone, I feel like shit. It makes me sad and remorseful.

          2. A Victor says:

            So their feeling good is real, to them, but it’s not genuine. bonk, bonk, bonk my head on my bed, I just don’t get this, ugh. It’s as bad as “Forever Wrong Upon the Throne” was, and that, once I got it, was embarrassingly simple.

        2. Truthseeker6157 says:

          Leigh,

          I know what you mean there. More with the negative side. I wouldn’t purposely make someone unhappy just for kicks. So I’m not a Greater or a Psychopath then! Mid Rangers aren’t causing unhappiness on purpose. They are doing it to have their needs met. Again, I’d put the needs of loved ones ahead of my own for the most part. So I differ from Mid Range. That said, if push comes to shove and it’s him or me, I’m going with me every time ha ha!

          I’m not sure about the positive side though. Does my happiness come from within? I don’t think it does with me. I’d say I’m set to neutral most of the time. People make me happy. My dog makes me happy. I have to interact with someone to feel happy I think. So in that respect I require positive fuel in many ways. I don’t wake up happy. Actually I usually could kill when I wake up so that’s a bad example. I don’t watch happy films, or listen to happy music. Not sure. Happy is an odd one. I don’t think I generate happiness from within. I make people happy. I make people feel better. I feel happy when I am able to do that. But am I happy myself, from myself, within myself. Don’t know. I’m neutral I think.

          1. Leigh says:

            This is very interesting. I operate in neutral too and then there are external factors that might alter my mood. I think the difference is that I don’t need an emotional reaction to feel good. Also, when a narc gets a negative reaction from you (crying, anger) that fuels him and makes him feel good and probably happy too. We don’t feel happy about making someone cry or angry. Yes, I feel pleasure from a great kiss but I also feel it from a bowl of ice cream or really good cup of coffee. I have moments of despair too. Just like the one I shared above.

            I think the neutral is happy or at least,, contentment. For the most part, I’m content. There is peace and calmness in the neutral. Of course, getting out and staying out would be the icing on the cake and would probably bring me bliss.

          2. A Victor says:

            TS, happiness is transient, and based on external events usually, imo. I do have joy in me though, even in the worst of times with my ex, it was still there. I could be dreadfully sad or upset by him but I still had joy. The only time this was challenged was when I had the hormones each month, that was a whole different thing. And my ex, I now believe, used that against me very viciously, never offering help or support or doing what I would ask but just sitting there soaking up the horrible negative fuel I emitted. But, aside from those days, 2-3/month, I have always had joy in me. It correlates with my narcissistic traits a bit possibly. My maternal parental unit, aka MPU going forward (thank you Asp Emp) could not put it out even, I knew someday I would be free and able to live as I wished. That stemmed from a bit of rebel in me and it made me joyful to know that I was, despite what anyone else might think, really was my own “boss”, independent and free-spirited even against the pressure. I just had to bide my time. My joy is also tied to my hope, and why it is so difficult to push my hope down. I feel like if I don’t have hope, I may as well die. Melodramatic maybe, but, it’s how strong my need for it is. It keeps me even and gives me joy to have it. Being here and learning about my life, so much more joy and freedom, confidence and contentedness (and hope, but I’m trying to hold that back!). I do have moods, they come and go, but I remain joyful even in the midst of them unless they are very extreme. My ex did not have that. He wasn’t neutral though either, oh no, he was quietly driven. He could not stop, ex machina, no joy. He did manage to make my joy go once for a bit longer, the time I went on antidepressants. But that was only a short time, 2 weeks maybe, and it flickered back on. Anyway, all of that to say that I don’t think neutral is a bad place to be, it’s different than empty, like he was, like MPU is. Thank you for sharing your experience with this, it’s good to know that it is different for each of us, I struggle to remember this, and within our differences, we’re all still okay.

          3. Leigh says:

            AV, we are just using different words but we are describing the exact same thing. Its something they can never take from us and something they will never have.

          4. A Victor says:

            That has been my conclusion also!! 🙂

          5. lickemtomorrow says:

            I hope others don’t mind me jumping into this conversation about happiness, but as an empath I experience both happiness and a sense of power at times. I believe there is a distinct difference between the two and it’s very hard to explain. I’ve tried to use a song before to explain it, but not sure if others can relate. Happiness for me is like a warm sensation, a bubbling, or glow inside. It is purely other centred in terms of how it might radiate, even though the feeling exists inside me. It’s effects are harmless, and even beneficial. Power for me is central to my being. It exists for me alone and not for others. While both may give us the sense of being bouyed, power is sourced and ultilized for the purposes of my self esteem, whereas happiness is sourced and utilized for the benefit of others including myself. I don’t know if that creates any greater understanding, but it might align with the way HG describes the sensation which derives from fuel for him, and how that differs from a sense of happiness in the empath. It’s one I’ve had to ponder on as well, and because I believe I experience both at different times that is how I would describe the difference.

          6. A Victor says:

            LET, I always enjoy your input. And I really appreciate this comment, your description of happiness is mine of joy! But mine is inward and my happiness comes more from outward things. The joy is more stable and has the element of contentment, the happiness is more of a mood that comes with things I enjoy experiencing. Your description of power is quite similar to my experience with it also except that mine is a source of my joy and my happiness and they are a source of my power. Thank you for sharing, I find this conversation fascinating.

          7. lickemtomorrow says:

            AV, I can concur with everything you said there, especially as it relates to joy <3

          8. Leigh says:

            LET, I feel power sometimes too and that sensation definitely makes me feel good. Its not happy though. Its two distinct different feelings. Its interesting because I feel guilty when I feel powerful because it means someone else might be feeling less powerful. I always want to reign it in. It can be very alluring. Sometimes I have to remove myself from the situation. Happiness doesn’t make me feel guilty. It just makes me feel good, warm and fuzzy. I’m sitting in front of my computer, drinking a great cup of coffee and I’m happy.

            LET, Thank you for jumping in, that really got me thinking.

          9. A Victor says:

            Yes, the morning cup of coffee, seeing my grandkids faces, finishing a project for work, so many things bring happiness, no guilt, only happiness.

          10. lickemtomorrow says:

            Leigh, thanks for sharing your thoughts and I agree a sense of power can be very alluring. It can also tip over into something else, which is what I think you are describing when you say sometimes you have to remove yourself from a situation. I imagine as empaths, who don’t require that sense of power (as we don’t need fuel), we are much more aware of it and some of the possible consequences. While we can enjoy feeling that way it’s more in our nature to consider others and, yes, that element of disempowerment they may experience at the same time. It probably depends on the circumstances, but we’re much more likely to give that power back to others for their benefit as well.

            Interesting how a Greater might do this with an element of cognitive empathy. Or, at least, this is how I imagine it after watching Taylor Swift’s Reputation tour on Netflix. In the later stages of the concert, and I would imagine fully fueled and feeling extraordinarily ‘powerful’, she begins to thank all the people working with her and for her, and I mean all of them. She doesn’t leave out any minor roles, up to and including the people who will come in and clean up the stadium after the concert is done. Now according to what I understand she will have no empathy for, nor interest in, any of these people. She has no need to mention them at all. I’ve actually never seen an artist do that before. For an artist with empathy, I imagine they would certainly also feel powerful and pumped up with the adulation they receive, the difference being they would do what Taylor did, but at the same time they would mean it. Not that any of the staff concerned would be feeling disempowered necessarily, but recognition would be given to the fact the artist could not do what they do without them. There is no sense of entitlement, etc.

            Personally, I don’t feel guilty when I feel powerful, as I see it as a natural phenomenon which is tempered by my empathic traits. I am happy to embrace it as a way to boost my self esteem, but I don’t take hold of it the way a narcissist might as they require it for their very survival.

            And I like your description of happy, sitting in front of the computer with a cup of coffee and feeling content 🙂 That’s my happy also xox

          11. Leigh says:

            LET says, “Personally, I don’t feel guilty when I feel powerful, as I see it as a natural phenomenon which is tempered by my empathic traits. I am happy to embrace it as a way to boost my self esteem, but I don’t take hold of it the way a narcissist might as they require it for their very survival.”

            That’s it in a nutshell. That gave me goosebumps! Its tempered by our empathic traits and we don’t require it for our survival!

          12. A Victor says:

            LET, I have to amend my previous comment, the one regarding happiness and joy. I went way back in the KTN posts today, back to fall of 2015. In one of those posts, HG describes joy with happiness as a component. I always thought of contentedness being one of the components and happiness a close relative. But, if we take his definition, I would have to change my thinking a bit and say it is contentedness, peace even, that I feel inwardly and happiness and joy happen from an external source more. Anyway, it was interesting, in many of the articles from back then, including the comment sections, HG thought/worded things much differently than he does now. It was quite enlightening and I wish I would’ve done it more thoroughly much sooner. I had done some but not nearly as much as recently. Anyway, I addressed this to you since we seem to see some of this quite similarly. Thanks for listening!

          13. lickemtomorrow says:

            AV, it can become confusing as you try to define these different elements and thanks for feeding back to me on that. They seem to be close companions – happiness, joy, contentment – so it’s hard to separate them out. HG does a great job of defining a lot of these things for us as empaths, and separating them out for the purposes of his narcissistic perspective and comparison. It continues to amaze me how he is able to provide insight even though he doesn’t experience any of these things which, of course, always makes me sad. Another thing HG doesn’t experience 🙁

            It’s so interesting how you are going back to older articles and picking up a difference in HGs thinking and wording around things. There’s probably a refining of ideas that might come with feedback from the comments, too. I did originally review older articles as well along with comments. They were very interesting, but I had trouble locating the pages unless I went back to the beginning again and moved forward one page at a time to get to where I last left off! Now sometimes I click on the older article of the same name at the bottom of the current article if I want to search that particular topic. I did notice commenters say at various stages that HGs demeanour had changed, which probably related to the fact he had acquired the knowledge he needed, refined it, and also had grown his platform to the point he didn’t have the time to respond in the same manner. I noticed he was very questioning of posters in the beginning, like a child who was making new discoveries. I hope he doesn’t mind me saying that. It was intriguing to read the enthusiasm that came with that and I was disappointed at times where I noticed commenters not responding to his questions. I have a huge empathic response to those type of instances. It is not hard to be polite since you’ve taken advantage of reading and commenting on his blog. Very few, if any, questions would be asked of us today. And I have a tendency to wait for the invite to ask for the most part, such as the Q&A’s which were happening this time last year.

            Anyway, that was a lot of blah, blah, blah, but going back on HGs work, and our own comments, can be very enlightening. I remember how passionate I was over my disengagement/discard last year and how I basically let it all hang out here 😛 I generally don’t go back to look at my own posts, but remember many of them, and how I felt at the time. There is a big difference in terms of how I felt then and how I feel now. It was all so intense in the beginning. So, the ET must be lowered and lowering, and the logic kicking in.

            Glad you shared more of your thoughts around that, AV, and we do seem to have a lot of similarities. I can’t always get to the various comments, but I don’t think I’ve read one of yours I haven’t appreciated or enjoyed in one respect of another. I’ve seen you say something about being prolific, but I never feels there’s a wasted word, and there’s one for everyone <3 Now, if that's making you feel powerful, be my guest 🙂 I really appreciate your input here xox

          14. A Victor says:

            LET, wow, thank you for this! No, not powerful but certainly grateful! I try to keep my comments brief and have been trying to use the like button more instead of a comment. You all know me as my children and closest friends irl do, I can be very chatty with them but in most situations I am very reserved. And my children still say I am quiet. Being online and anonymous makes a difference too, add well as written vs verbal etc.

            I have been able to favorite, bookmark, the page I’m on and it will go there when I come back to it. I just recently figured that out though, which did impede progress.

            I too picked up on the questions, very interesting, and was saddened when there was no reply, both for HG and myself to learn more. Everything changes, as his platforms and audience expand I expect there will continue to be even less availability for interaction, this makes me sad personally but happy to have the information spreading. I don’t know how he keeps up now even.

            Thank you again, your comment made my day!

          15. lickemtomorrow says:

            No problem, AV, and I understand that element of gratefulness <3 You've made such a great contribution here, and perhaps the environment (online and anonymous) does make a difference to how we are able to share. And how willing we are to do that also. I will go very deep with people I know and trust in person. Anonymity gives you the ability to do the same online, I guess. Either way, it's helpful and healing. I'm grateful for both those options.

            Ah, thanks for the bookmarking heads up! You've figured it out for both of us 🙂

            Totally with you on HG and his platform … wish I had been here sooner.

            And happy to make your day! I hope you share with your children what a benefit you have been to us xox

          16. Whitney says:

            I think power is so needed by the Narcissist that it’s pursuit is all that matters. That’s why there’s no room for happiness. Happiness is useless.

            Lickemtomorrow your comment about your own happiness and power was so interesting. Because I don’t know the feeling of “power”, I’ve never experienced it. I think my brother (a super empath) craves power and happiness, like you!

            What is power Lickemtomorrow? What makes you feel that as an emotion?

            My happiness is 8/10 during the worst times and 9 to 11/10 during good times. I’m so lucky for that. All I wish for my children and anyone is happiness. Except bad people – I wish them a torturous death

          17. lickemtomorrow says:

            Hey Whitney 🙂

            What is power? It seems like there are a lot of comments here where people give different expression to what something is, might be, is not and how can we even compare? It’s possible it is different for everybody <3

            In my experience, power is a sensation. That's first up. We know power exists in other forms, but here were are talking about the sensation, I think.

            If I could describe it I would say it lights me up, makes me feel full, strengthens me, embraces me, reassures me, and enables me to believe I am worthwhile and have something to give. I am an Amazon and nothing can defeat me! That is what power feels like to me. Happiness is much more breezy. Power exists in the tempest.

            What makes me feel that as an emotion or sensation? When I achieve something which I think is in its own way unique, meaning I created it and in a way I am the only one who could have done that. So it comes from the act of creation. I could liken it to HG and his articles. He writes these amazing articles and they touch so many peoples lives. They are unique in an of themselves, and they are also unique because no one but HG could have created them. Perhaps HG gets a sense of power from his ability to do this which is separate to the fueling he receives because of it. But something like that would cause me to feel powerful. As an empath I would also be grateful that I have the ability to do whatever it is the creative thing might be. So the sense of power also extends to knowing that any giftedness doesn't come from me. A narcissist might view that as emanating from their own superiority, exceptionalism, etc.

            So much comes back to the fact that each and every one of us are unique individuals, and we all have something to offer. Moments of power for me are when I can rest on those things and appreciate them as unique to me. But I will humble myself also in those moments recognizing that I am not the "author" of whatever it is that makes me unique. While I can celebrate it joyfully, it must always be accompanied by a sense of humility for me.

            Happiness is another interesting concept, and I see you are at times overflowing with it, Whitney xox You are very fortunate that you are open to that experience and have it in such full measure. If I had to guess I would say you are a "heart on your sleeve" kind of person, and that you are greatly moved by things either for better or for worse. I'm with you on the bad people and wishing them a torturous death!

            I don't know if my explanation helps you at all, but since you asked I've given the best description I can. And I don't know if the sense of power can be associated with the Super Empath, but I do have a strong minority Super which could be an indication. Lovely to hear you have a Super Empathic brother as well <3 I hope he is looking out for you xox

          18. A Victor says:

            LET, I love your description of power, that it’s exactly how I experience it.

          19. lickemtomorrow says:

            Hopefully that means I got it right, AV 😉 If two of us can agree we might be onto something <3 It's such a difficult thing to describe, but I've done my best xox

          20. A Victor says:

            LET, well, don’t know if two counts as majority, but we are entitled to our perspective regardless and we two can agree! 😃

          21. Truthseeker6157 says:

            AV,

            I don’t see hope as a bad thing. Hope keeps people alive. It keeps people fighting for change and for something better.
            I don’t see hope as a false mistress. Unless in the context of ‘just sit there and hope your way out of it.’ I see false hope as a false mistress. Hope itself is necessary.

          22. A Victor says:

            Thank you. I have just been trying to follow the program. It seems people have success when they do that. But don’t worry, my hope is never completely gone! I actually love it and could never NC it, just ANC at the moment. 🙂

          23. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hey LET,

            How’s you? That’s an interesting comment about power. I think I’m with Whitney. I don’t recall feeling powerful. Confident, yes. Sure footed, yes. Headstrong and decisive, yes. Power? I don’t think so. That could just be semantics though. I think I associate power as power over people as opposed to power in oneself. I think you associate power as within oneself if I understand correctly. I’m definitely lacking on the inner happiness front too by the sounds of things haha! Gawd, I’m beige. Am I beige?! I want to be red!! Xx

          24. lickemtomorrow says:

            TS, I am well, and enjoying reading your comments and accessing the wisdom of everyone here. I think I’ve posted a couple of comments about power now, so I’ve tried to explain a little further around that. For me it is different to feeling confident, certain or sure footed, even headstrong and decisive. Those are all wonderful attributes, that are not always easy to access, and if I were to describe power differently to that I would go back to describing it as a sensation. It wells up from inside you and is the basis of inspiration and insight. It gives you a sense of strength and infallibility. I think I said in my earlier comment when I am feeling powerful I am an Amazon and nothing can defeat me! So, yes, I associate it as something that exists within me and arises out of me depending on the circumstances. Let me go back to a couple of song lines I mentioned earlier:

            “I pictured a rainbow
            You held it in your hands
            I had flashes
            You saw the plan
            I wandered out in the world for years
            While you just stayed in your room
            I saw the crescent
            You saw the whole of the moon”

            The Waterboys – “The Whole of the Moon”

            It is the feeling or sensation of seeing the whole of the moon, holding the rainbow in your hands, knowing the plan.

            I saw your comment about happiness and how you experience it more as an external thing and often in relation to helping others. I think happy comes in lots of different forms for lots of different people. Nobody likes fake happy, so I’m glad you’re not that. And you’re being honest when you say you think you are set to neutral or beige. Nothing wrong with your settings unless you think there might be something underlying that. I do wonder if some of us are geared to just enjoying life while others are deep thinkers and carry that burden through life with them. I’d say being a Truthseeker you have taken a lot of other peoples concerns on board and left little time for your own. That could dampen someone’s sense of spontaneity and potential happiness. And maybe it’s just crappy weather that’s painted life beige for now. I don’t think you are painted that colour at all. You have painted yourself in many beautiful hues here <3 Sometimes we just don't see ourselves as others see us.

            Just to finish where we started, for me both a sense of power and happiness can be fleeting, but power will surge through you and happiness will sit on your shoulder 🙂

          25. Leigh says:

            Perfect description LET! I just want to add that the power & strength makes me feel like no one can topple me. And I agree, power and happiness are both fleeting. I can understand why the narcissist always wants that power.

          26. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hey LET,

            I think the way you differentiate between power and happiness makes it much clearer. I understand what you are driving at and can confirm that power is not something I feel or have felt. Unless I have, and put it down to something else.

            Happiness I definitely see as occurring through human contact. I am capable of happy and experience happy or at least a derivative thereof. I wouldn’t feel happy by eating a custard cream for example. I’d say I enjoyed the custard cream, it wouldn’t make me happy though. I could go on holiday to Mauritius alone and say I enjoyed the warmth and the beautiful scenery, found it relaxing etc but it wouldn’t make me happy. If I went to Mauritius with the kids though, or a loved one, I’d experience happiness. Memories would be made that I would replay and smile at. That would make me happy. So I’d be happy at the time and happy thinking about it after. (Thought fuel?!) So for me, I think happy has to involve someone else. Not a place, a thing or an object etc.

            It could be a different classification of the same feeling or, I’m harder to make happy, who knows ?!

            I am comfortable being alone. In fact people can overload me so at times it is necessary for me to withdraw and be alone. I’m not sad when I’m alone, I could be alone for weeks and be content but I wouldn’t describe the feeling as happy either, so again it points to a need for human contact.

            I think happy might be a difference in description, but power I definitely don’t experience. That might be why I question if positive fuel and the power that the narcissist gets from that isn’t actually akin to our happiness. I don’t know what power feels like. It sounds like there is a discernible difference from what you describe.

            Thank you for the compliment as to my hues of colour x. Perhaps we do see others differently to the way we perceive ourselves and more so than we might think. HG has pointed this out to me before. I see myself as Contagion, but that isn’t necessarily how others see me.

            I remember a trainer correcting me on my learning drivers once too. I swore blind I was visual ( I’m most definitely not auditory which is a bit strange given I’m an empath). He said I was kinetic kinaesthetic, one of the two ha ha, led by touch. Perception is interesting isn’t it?

            Thank you for your comment LET, I do now understand what you are describing, even if I can’t relate to it. Xx

          27. lickemtomorrow says:

            Well, looks like HG moderated your comment, TS, and there are more things in it that I can relate to, such as being comfortable being on my own (as I am a deep thinker and not given to superficial interactions – it suits me to spend large chunks of time alone), and also the sense of feeling overloaded by interactions with others at times. While I can enjoy the interactions, I find I need respite from them in order to absorb them and balance my energies again. And I know nothing about energies, except to say that I feel drained and need to replenish. It’s like people drawing from you, in an unaware fashion, and there is an inherent need to replenish the coffers, so to speak!

            When it comes to learning, I find with HGs work I prefer to read for the most part. If someone explains something to me verbally, I don’t take it in as well. Which is why I have a preference for the blog for the most part. It’s not that I get distracted, although I can, it’s just I take it in better when I read. Give me a book in my hand any day as compared to a audio book. Horses for courses, as they say. I’m not sure it has a lot to do with our empathic traits, but that you are led by touch is very interesting. I wonder how you experience that? I do find I love to touch things in nature as well as see or look at them. I’ll touch a tree or leaves just to feel them. It’s an element of exploration, I guess. And it’s also grounding. Not sure if you can relate to any of that. But, I’ve also got a good imagination and can live in my head no problem, visualizing ideas. I just can’t always visualize what someone else is explaining unless they write it down and put it in front of me. Odd.

            Anyway, good chat 🙂 You’ve given more to think about xox

          28. Truthseeker6157 says:

            LET,

            Something just this second dawned on me. I am manipulative. I confess to being manipulative. Mostly in a work context but I still do it outside work too. When I manipulate and see it worked, I get a kick out of it. That might be more of a power feeling ?

            Example. Yesterday I was taking Sophie to get braces fitted. Sophie is practically dentist and doctor phobic. She’s never sick, so she is unused to being messed with or examined. The process of having to sit in the chair for an hour therefore was a big deal. Once she thinks about it and starts to refuse it feeds in on itself so it reaches a point where she is like a cornered animal, she won’t let anyone near her. There was a high chance she would be too scared to get the braces.

            She really wants straight teeth. There is my in. So she asked me, once the moulds and x rays are done, ( she wouldn’t even let them x ray last time) did I think she would get her braces on that afternoon. So I answered, “ That depends. Time has been allocated to you and whatever they can get done in the hour they will do. So if you do what they ask and they can move you through the process quickly, (no time for her to think) then yes, you will get your braces this afternoon and you will be on your countdown to straight teeth.” (Genuine promised gain) Then the kicker, “ If they don’t get to your braces today though, don’t worry, you’ll still get them, the next appointment will be in 4 or 5 months time, (lie, it’s in June) so you can get them then.” (Manipulation by threatened loss.) I knew exactly what I was doing and used her desire for straight teeth to get her to do what I wanted. The fact that it was for her benefit doesn’t detract from the fact that it was a manipulation.

            She got the braces, I have never before seen her so compliant. She was elated afterwards, elated that she did it, elated that the countdown has now begun.

            I smirked to myself after the conversation that morning, because I knew what I had done and I knew it would likely work. I smiled to myself once the appointment was over for the similar reason but more because she was so elated.

            That could be power. It could just be pride. Not sure. I’d say ‘I get a kick out of manipulating’. When you read my description though, it does sound very narcissistic doesn’t it? I know I’m not a narcissist as I have the empathic side, but as far as that side of me goes, really I use a lot of the same skills as a narcissist, I just didn’t know what many of them were called until I arrived here. I don’t actually set out to manipulate but I will do if the situation calls for it. I don’t manipulate consistently or if it causes harm to anyone else. I do it more as a fast route. So maybe I do feel power, just in a very specific way.

            Given that every interaction with a narcissist is a manipulation, then maybe I do understand the feeling of positive fuel in terms of power not happiness. God knows, I think I’m confusing myself now let alone everyone else!

          29. Asp Emp says:

            TS, good to read that your encouraged your daughter to obtain her goal. That is not manipulation – nor narcissistic. It is you being a strong & loving parent. Your last paragraph is based on your learning & understanding of narcissism. So, you can un-confuse yourself 🙂

          30. lickemtomorrow says:

            First things first, TS, I’m delighted your daughter managed to get her braces fitted and without too much fuss. I have one child who also dislikes procedures so I can relate to the need to find a way around their resistance. In this instance you achieved your aim well and it seems both of you benefited with a win 🙂

            I hadn’t thought of the use of manipulation in terms of feeling powerful (as opposed to happy). Certainly getting ‘the win’ can make us feel powerful, so you might be onto something there. I’ve seen you speaking about motivations, and here the motivation is what would make the difference between empath and narcissist, I think. It is still a manipulation, but in the instance with your daughter intended only for her good. That’s different to the narcissist who seeks to benefit themselves. Remembering the transactional nature of the narcissist as well. It’s possible the sense of power which might derive from ‘the win’ is the same as the narcissist, but it will have a totally different motivation and meaning for the empath. And I suppose we have to remember that we are also a bundle of narcissistic traits, so there’s no denying we can also utlitize and benefit from these, due to the fact we are not angels, and can succumb to both the positive and negative use of these traits.

            Overall, I get the sense you are talking about getting ‘the win’, TS, which may involve some manipulation, and how that can most certainly make us feel powerful. That may be an easy way to separate power out from happiness which generally isn’t part of a manipulative process, happiness being a natural consequence of circumstances in comparison.

            Hopefully I haven’t added to anyone’s confusion as I’ve shared my thoughts xox

          31. Leigh says:

            TS, I loved that story about Sophie! As a mother, I know that I have manipulated a situation more than once. I didn’t find you to be narcissistic at all. You shifted her focus so she could get to her goal. You gave her power and strength. I saw your empathy shining through. No way a narcissist would do this for their child. My husband would have had no patience and would have left me to handle it.

            This story made me happy.

          32. A Victor says:

            These were my thoughts exactly. Shifting things so they can see a bigger picture and come to their own conclusion or outcome is an okay reason to manipulate a situation, I believe. And it does empower them.

          33. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hey LET,

            Your ideas on this has really helped me straighten my thinking out so thank you. In fact the whole conversation with the various ideas and descriptions has really helped. There’s a trust in here amongst this group which is really encouraging. I loved your paragraph about traits and us not being angels, an acceptance. A trust that if we do manipulate, then on the whole it is done for what we believe to be the right reasons, occasionally for ourselves because we do carry those narcissistic traits too.

            I had written another response to you first before the Sophie story, where I was convinced I didn’t feel power. I pressed send and a few minutes later, I thought, ‘hang on, actually I think I do’ ha ha. It’s in moderation, you’ll laugh when it comes through. I got myself completely turned around. You got me there in the end though!

            The braces have been aching over the last day. Shame I can’t manipulate myself out of this one! Ha ha!

          34. lickemtomorrow says:

            Glad I could be of help, TS, and I’m only sorting it all out in my own head as well <3

            I'll look out for your other response, but I don't think I'll laugh as much as take it as part of the untangling process 😉 Don't you hate it when you hit 'send' and then do a double take?! Often someone will come in with more information or insight and I'll do a double take then as well. It all adds to our progress, which is the main thing.

            And I can empathize with poor Sophie 🙁 My eldest had braces, and I had them, too, when I was younger, so I can literally feel her pain. Thankfully, it doesn't last long, but it can be very uncomfortable. I hope she will be feeling better soon. And she'll definitely feel better when she sees the end result <3 LOL to not being able to manipulate yourself out of this one … but I think your hugely empathic traits might suffice. Nothing like a little of TLC to make her feel better until she does xox

          35. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Leigh,

            I’m glad my story with Sophie made you happy. You would be happier still if you had seen us walk out of the dentist surgery! She’s almost my height now, she was fizzing with excitement and probably relief. I was so proud of her, it was a big step forward. We walked back to the car with our arms around each other grinning like crazy people!

            I did wonder after I posted my comment if what I had done there was good or bad. I don’t make a habit of manipulating my own children, they have to make their own mistakes. I have to bite my tongue, hide my shoes and sit on my hands at times though !

            It took four visits to the salon to get her ears pierced ha ha. The dentist would have been way less understanding. She really really wanted to do it, in my mind it was a case of needs must. I’m glad you saw it for what it was xx

          36. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Hey Asp Emp,

            Thank you for your comment and for seeing my thinking. I’ve taken to analysing things within an inch of my life at the moment! I see things more clearly on the one hand. I like recognising which parts of my empathic make up are automatically taking the lead. I think to myself, ‘Oh bloody hell I do do that don’t I?’ On the other hand, I overthink it sometimes.

            A year on and I’m still fascinated by this subject. I’m fascinated by narcissists but I’m equally fascinated by empaths. More mental space to think about our side since I evicted the online narc from my head! Xx

        3. Violetta says:

          Sometimes we do need others, though: I get my rush from petting puppies and cuddling babies. So it’s not entirely from within, though the effects are beneficial to both parties.

          1. Leigh says:

            Absolutely I get it from external factors too. The hot sun on my back, the smell of a baby, the crashing waves at the ocean, a really good kiss or sometimes just sitting in silence. I just mean that we already have it, we just have to tap into it. The narcissist doesn’t have it and no matter how hard they try, they can’t tap into it.

          2. A Victor says:

            Hm, they would not get pleasure from any of those things? Pleasure from the senses is different from happy, that is true. And HG has said he doesn’t receive power from these things, and I think even that they are fairly meaningless to him unless he’s getting power somehow via them from an appliance. This is helpful.

          3. Leigh says:

            AV, Yes, they have nerve endings and that’s how they derive pleasure but its not genuine happiness. I can’t get passed the fact that almost every narcissist I know is miserable and a chronic complainer. I equate happiness with peace. Maybe, I’m wrong, I don’t know. But because I’m at peace, I feel happy & content. How can they be at peace, if they have to hurt another person to get to that peace?

          4. Violetta says:

            Leigh:

            Back-of-the-neck baby smell… ooohh.

          5. Leigh says:

            🥰🥰🥰

        4. JB says:

          Leigh, but who decides that it’s only a genuine feeling if it’s not been caused by hurting or using someone? Maybe the concept of love is more fluid than we all think; one person’s idea of love isn’t necessarily another’s..I don’t know, just random thoughts that occurred to me while I was listening..

          For me, happiness does sometimes come from other people. I think my need for external validation is quite high. Bit like my dad, but hopefully much nicer! 😂

          1. Leigh says:

            JB, it might be a genuine feeling and they might be putting the label of happy or love on it, but its not love in it truest definition. You can’t hurt someone to make yourself feel better and call it love.

            Yes, other people can generate happiness in us just like they can also generate sadness but the feelings are already there. The narcissist doesn’t have those feelings at all.

          2. JB says:

            Leigh, I agree with you about what constitutes/doesn’t constitute love. Was just having random philosophical thoughts, wondering who decided what the criteria for genuine love would be 🙂

        5. Violetta says:

          I don’t know. I felt huge relief when I finally slugged that girl who’d been bullying me for years.

          1. Leigh says:

            That was you taking your power back and I can see how good that would feel!

  5. Ciara says:

    Great interview H.G..Very articulated and well spoken.🌷

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

  6. lickemtomorrow says:

    This was a great interview and she asked so many intelligent questions – some I never thought of and would like to have answered myself. She was a little bit concerned about the ‘sting in your tail’, HG, but appears to have come away unscathed. I think what impressed me the most was your response to her request for tips on how to become more narcissistic. You made it very clear that empaths, and normals, are not manipulators and should not seek to do so. Rather than encourage the manipulation of others you put a lid on it. Needless to say you’ve gone up another notch on the admiration scale for me <3

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

  7. December Infinity says:

    I am listening to this interview right now. Awesome 8)

  8. Truthseeker6157 says:

    This was interesting. I couldn’t warm to this interviewer at all to begin with. I thought she was going to talk too much, stick rigidly to pre prepared questions and disrupt the flow. I thought HG did a good job of keeping the interview on track. Perhaps she was just a little nervous.

    In fact, she did imply wariness of HG on several occasions. I’m not sure if that was game play or genuine. If it was genuine I find that interesting in itself. I wonder if there are readers on the blog that don’t comment because of HG’s diagnosis. People have mentioned initial reluctance to comment due to not wanting to appear stupid and also shame in some cases. I can understand both. Fear of HG as an individual I don’t understand. Fair play, the title Narcissistic Psychopath sounds scary but to my knowledge he can’t reach through screens or transport himself down a phone line.

    From the perspective of this interview it smacked a little of the interviewer being unsure if the regular audience would agree with the decision to interview HG. An exercise in hedging her bets perhaps. Call me cynical, but there was something about that I didn’t like at all.

    HG was charming and knowledgeable as we would expect. I didn’t feel a gelling as I have in other interviews though. The videos referred to I had in mind too as the questions were asked, so I’m pleased my own knowledge appears to be growing and sticking. I did see how HG took the lead in the interview. I found that interesting also. Subtle but very effective.

    It was nice to see the recognition in the interviewer’s personal story about her mother at the funeral. The ‘Wow, he’s good, he’s really good’ moment. Yes, he is, we know, that’s why we listen to him and take his advice.

    Nicely done HG.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you and your observations are valid.

    2. Leigh says:

      TS6157, I thought there was something off with the interviewer also. I thought her questions were a little odd but I agree that Mr. Tudor steered the interview back to where it belonged. Her question at the end on how to advice women to act like a narcissist seemed like a huge red flag to me. Why would an empath choose to live that way?

      As for fear of Mr. Tudor, I’ll give you my story. Hopefully he posts it. I want to preface this by saying that I am extremely grateful to his knowledge and him providing that knowledge to us. I don’t know where I would be without it. With that said, I had an interaction with him as my self, not as my pseudonym. There was a discount going on and I figured I would jump on the chance to buy a couple of things. I only had a limited amount of money to spend. Well, I put the wrong code in and I didn’t get the discount and I was unable to buy everything I wanted. When I reached out to him, he wasn’t very understanding. I know it was my fault for putting in the wrong code. At that moment though, I needed understanding and compassion and I didn’t get it because he is a narcissist and isn’t capable of either. I sat in the parking lot of the store where I had just bought the gift card and cried. I’m not a cry baby. I’m really not. But in that moment I felt inadequate and there is always that fear that if I interact with Mr. Tudor that I will feel that way again. Its interesting because then I became pissed off. I was pissed off that once again, the universe showed me that the only person I can count on, is myself.

      1. Truthseeker6157 says:

        Hey Leigh,

        Thank you for sharing that with me. It offers a different perspective and I’m aware I can be a little brash at times. I should be more mindful of the fact that empaths arrive here with self esteem shattered and after enduring years of abuse from familial or romantic narcissists. I acknowledge that and apologise if my original comment sounded dismissive. Others have different perspectives to mine.

        I’ve done it too. The wrong code thing. I actually forgot to put the code in, ha ha! I didn’t email though. I was more in the camp of “awww TS, what did you do that for?!” I didn’t think to email as I saw it as my error. If it wasn’t my error, then I’d email and say “HG, I bought this and can’t get it to work.” Or,” I put the code in, and it charged me full price.” I have reported a faulty file before now and it was fixed immediately and very courteously via email.

        It illustrates the black and white thinking of the narcissist to an extent. A fault at my end or a fault at your end, no in between. That said, if I dropped my new phone out of the box, I can’t see my phone provider issuing me with a new one either, so I get both sides. You reached out because you really needed some leeway, some support when you were at a low ebb, it was the straw that broke the camel’s back at a time when you could have done without the loss. I see your side too. There’s something about car parks and crying. I’m not a crier either but if I do cry, there’s a high chance it’ll be in a car park. I can imagine how you felt, frustration bubbling over, I really feel for you there Leigh.

        As far as interacting with HG goes, I would say, just go for it. Ask your questions, make your suggestions. He can only not answer or say no. More likely though, you would enjoy the interaction and have your question answered to boot ! HG is open to ideas and suggestions too. He might not always agree, but in my experience, he takes them onboard and appreciates the input.

        I realise this is a mindset thing too. When people have been put down or ignored, that’s not as easy as it perhaps sounds. The blog is a safe learning environment in all kinds of respects, self esteem and confidence included.

        I just felt a little game play with the Pink Pill lady. I didn’t see her wariness as genuine. I can understand yours, that’s genuine and stems more from past experience perhaps than anything else. I didn’t get the same feeling from her.

        Thank you for your comment Leigh. It has made me think and check myself xx.

        1. Leigh says:

          TS, you weren’t brash or dismissive. I know you’re not like that. You’re extremely understanding. That’s why I offered my point of view. I knew you would understand.

          I agree, I didn’t think she was genuine either. She did seem a little self absorbed. I’m going to listen again. I like to listen a couple of times to make sure I really soak it in. I also agree that Mr. Tudor did a good job of steering the interview in the right direction.

          As for reaching out about the wrong discount code, I thought of it like a department store. Often times if you forget your coupon, they have one behind the counter you can use. I figured I’d give it a shot.

          1. Truthseeker6157 says:

            Leigh,

            That’s a good point about the department stores. You have made me think about my arrival in the US. I remember thinking how friendly everyone was. Stores, restaurants etc. Conversely, when I came back to the UK, I was shocked by how miserable people seemed ha ha! We aren’t actually miserable, we just take a while to warm up! I speak for the normal and empath group of course.

            People in stores here would be more like, ‘No coupon, no chance’. For the most part that is. There are always some happy exceptions to be had. I blame lack of sunshine !

  9. WhoCares says:

    An enjoyable interview. It was interesting how you handled certain subjects in this one.

  10. Bubbles says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    Packed full of informative and knowledge, as always
    Most interesting to hear the interviewer’s questions raised from her book regarding racial/ religious relationships, always learning something new !
    Her mother’s display in church was a great example of narcissism and your dissection was most explicit in its breakdown
    Always leaving them wanting more …. you certainly did !
    Thank you, I very much enjoyed your continued eloquence 😊
    Luv Bubbles xx 😘

  11. MsCynthia says:

    The interview was interesting and well conducted. I appreciate that the lady who conducted it is familiar with your work. It puts her head and shoulders above what we see and hear on mainstream media today. The breakdown of Cadre and Class of narcissists is helpful to hear repeatedly, since I’m not yet familiar with them. Well done.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

  12. Theresa Brezovski says:

    H. G. HAVE SOME QUESTIONS. CAN A NARC FATHER RAISE A NARC DAUGHTER?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Potentially, yes.

  13. A Victor says:

    Glad for the clarification regarding APD and sociopath vs psychopath.

    “every woman’s dream but no soul” she hit that on the head!

    The racial aspect presented is as informative as it is horrifying. I had no idea.

    There is that excellent definition of love again. How do we know if a narcissist is faking this, or can’t they?

    The religious aspect applies to people of both genders and likely all ethnicities, in my experience. There is that forgiveness piece as well, now I understand better.

    Looking back my ex didn’t show love to the kids, that had never dawned on me. He was just neutral.

    Wow, the words were/are nothing! A year! I would never have thought that long! Good to know.

    It was a relief that you did not give tips to attract people like narcissists, that would be confusing.

    Excellent interview. There was fuel but mixed with a healthy respect for you are.

    I think the number of questions I have just dropped by a third! Thank you for putting this here HG!

  14. narcfreeandhealing says:

    This was a great interview HG 😊

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Thank you.

Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Previous article

Let’s Talk About Ex, Baby

Next article

The Cold Dead Stare