One More Chance



What harm could it do to give us one more chance? Like the gambler placing another bet in the hope of winning big, there is everything to gain and not much more to lose really is there?

You are down amongst the dead so what could possibly go wrong? Besides, imagine if you did not do so? Imagine that you pass up this opportunity and somebody else takes it? Somebody else benefits from all of your work and they get it right.

They do and say the right things so they enjoy the joy of the ecstasy forever. It would be like allowing someone ahead of you in the queue and they buy a winning lottery scratchcard from the selection you had your eye on. So near, yet oh so far.

Imagine the crushing dejection of knowing that you had it in your grasp but you failed to follow through and seize the moment. How could you live with yourself thereafter if you failed to act on this glorious chance?

You don’t want to let anybody else gain the advantage do you? Not after everything you have done to steady the ship, to keep things afloat and to steer a sensible course through hazardous waters.

You are owed that chance.

You are entitled to that magnificent outcome and here it is being offered to you. All you have to do is take hold of it and give us another chance to make things right. Yes, it has failed in the past but did Robert the Bruce give up in his attempts to defeat the English? No he did not, he kept on going didn’t he and I know, I just know that you are made of similar stuff.

You have that indefatigable spirit, that is why I chose you. I knew you would not give up. Too many people let me down, but not you. You aren’t going to do that are you? You have your eyes on the prize. You could not live with yourself if you knew you had given up the chance for us to return to our glorious relationship once again.

I know some people say that past behaviour is the greatest indicator of future behaviour but they are just bitter because they lacked the capacity and the ability to make a change. They wanted to make a difference but they didn’t have the goods.

They didn’t have the gumption, the wherewithal, the necessary to do the job. You have. I can tell. I know these things and if you just believe in me this one time then everything will be different. Just one chance. That is all that I am asking for. It isn’t much, not after everything we have been through.

You aren’t going to throw away everything that we have built up are you? I surely do not think that you will do such a thing. You are not like that. You believe in us and you are the one who holds the key to a magical future. Just place the key in the lock, turn it and open the door to me.

I will be there waiting. I have all the time in the world. I am not going to go anywhere soon if I know that you are going to continue to believe in me, but if you are going to give up, even though I don’t think you will, well, there are plenty who will take your place.

No, I haven’t got anybody lined up, I am not saying that. I am just pointing out that someone as special as me, well, there are people who would be interested, that is all that I am saying. But let’s not talk about them.

That is just something which might happen if you make the wrong decision. Not that you will. You are good at making decisions. I know that. You chose to be with me. Oh I know I made it seem like that I came after you but let’s not delude ourselves here, you are the one who made the decision.

After all, you are in control of your own destiny aren’t you? I just offered myself to you, you had to make the decision to make that step towards me and you did and do you know why? Because you know. You know that we belong together. You know how we feel about one another.

Yes, I know there are difficult times, but that is just what life throws at us but you and I, well, we are better than that aren’t we? I am not trying to influence you because I have ultimate faith in you to do the right thing. You know your own mind. All I am doing is asking yourself whether it is worth throwing away all that we have, all that we can have, just because you will not give me another chance?

I know you are someone who believes in the power of love. I do too. Love is all that we need and what you and I have, well, nobody else really understands it do they? I know what people say about me and you being together, but it is all jealousy. Are you going to let the outrageous comments of others deny you your happiness?

I would not think that for a moment you would conceivably allow that to happen. You are your own person. I have always respected that. I gave you what you needed. I know at times I might be a hard task master but I did it for us because it is only when you are truly and sorely tested that you can tell that it is love.

Anybody can love like the books and the films. Anybody can be on top of their game when they have no worries and no concerns. A real test of a relationship is when the chips are down, when your backs are against the wall when it is against all odds. It is when somebody else interferes, wants what you have and you have to fight for what you want. You have.

I have seen the fire and the determination in your eyes because I know you want me. You want us to be together. We have been tested, repeatedly, but have we not come through it? Have we not come out on the other side and we are better for it? Our love has become stronger because we have been tested and we survived that test. Are you going to let all of that go to waste just because I say some things in the heat of the moment?

That is passion for you, you bring it out in me, I cannot help it that you cause these emotions to erupt from me. Would you rather me be a cold and heartless shell? Of course you would not. I am what I am and I am a cauldron which you manage to stir because that is how you and I are.

Other people hurl their opinions around, I know they do, I am not stupid, I know what they say, but they do not understand you and me. They do not have what we have and they are misguided at best and jealous at worst. It will always be the case that people are envious of me, it happens repeatedly when you are someone like me, I deal with it.

So, give me another chance. It is easy and we have so, so much to look forward to. There is nothing really more you can lose is there by trying again, but if you don’t you will always wonder, “what if?” and it will drive you demented not knowing what might have been if you had trusted your instinct and allowed me back.

Let’s do it. Let’s create our wonderful world again. Just you and me.

Just say yes.

7 thoughts on “One More Chance

  1. cadavera says:

    After reading this article and the earlier posts of it and the comments from last Sept and Dec, it’s not the narcissists in my life who do this to me. It’s me telling myself these things–not all of them, but a good portion. I’ve come to realize that it’s not them so much as it is me who’s the problem. I take what horrible things they say and that trigger me to no end and I run with them, telling myself these things over and over and I’ve done this for decades. Although their words are what have started this, it’s me who does the most damage as they are long gone but their words (now my words) are still being told to me as they swirl infinitely around in my head. What is this shit? Wtf have I done over the past say 34 long years? And how does someone at age 50 stop doing this to themselves? Is this addiction? I think many would say that I enjoy the harm this causes me. I don’t enjoy it though, but I’m used to it. And I believe what I tell myself. Knowing this, I see no way out. As much as I’d like to think that just stopping myself from these thoughts is the answer, I also know that it’s much easier said than done. For as long as I can remember, various people have told me to stop being so hard on myself. I really never understood what they meant or were referring to until more recent times. I’m terrible to myself and am I just that weak that I continue to do this? Idk what’s true and what isn’t anymore but one thing I do know is this: I don’t know another person who’s had the experiences I have nor have I read the accounts of anyone else who has had as many narcs as I have go through their lives. And I’ve read a lot of accounts by others. My situation appears to be different than most, at least from what I’ve been reading for going on 4 years now, and even though I’ve read a ton of posts and comments that were spot on as to what I’ve dealt with, there’s another aspect that I haven’t seen anyone else describe and that is when the person has become the monster and refuses to stop tormenting themselves. Am I even making some semblance of sense here? I never mention this to anyone, so I’m going out on a limb here so I’m asking anyone who comments to what I’ve written to please not shame or humiliate me–not that anyone would, but try to choose your words carefully because I’m gonna use anything that sounds like shit talking against myself. The fact that I’m even asking this makes me feel really freaking lame, btw. LOL. It’s actually quite laughable and it’s also very serious at the same time. Talk about a no-win situation. Ugh! Sorry for being so pathetic everyone. I just know that I run with any backlash these days and am creating so many mountains out of molehills that I suspect a new mountain range will pop up in Southern California at any given moment. Thanks all and I hope (hate that word) that someone else has done this and made it through to the other side because I’m thinking that it’s not probable or possible at this stage.

  2. BC30 says:

    There’s nothing to gain and everything to lose, belief in anything else is foolish—at best.

  3. Asp Emp says:

    Just watched Daniel C in ‘Casino Royale’ – very good – the innuendos, the gun shoots, the intense stares….. good stuff. Laughed at him saying “I’ve got an itch, would you mind?” (being smacked with the rope) scene…..

  4. Dave W says:

    Knowing vs Doing
    We are taught many things in life including avoiding the use of always and never. And yet the narcissist will be one time, perhaps the only time in life where always and never are 100% applicable. If there are any character traits to be assimilated from and about the narcissist it is the always and never of their black and white thinking as appertains to them- that one exception to the rule brought on by their corrupted operating system- and our vulnerability to it. The over used definition of “insanity being the repetition of that which has proven not to work but doing it anyway” Applies. Application (Doing) of awareness is the second part of beating he addiction- and the hardest. But remember you are an adult and can choose to suffer or not. FREE will requires freedom from your programs and addictions. Fool me once- shame on You! Fool me Twice…

  5. Mary says:

    I did that a thousand times..

  6. jdontiger says:

    I can see all this happening to someone who had a great relationship that slowly plummeted before being discarded or escaping. Mine was shit from the beginning and I still chose to try because he sad he wanted to change. I didn’t have the golden period, briefly had the bronze… my mistake was truly believing he wanted to change and that I was going to be the one to help him overcome his demons.. There are no fantastic memories for me to fall back on, just memories of me trying to help a narcissist who was just using me for whatever reason during our time together.. Lesson learned. Thank you HG.

    1. HG Tudor says:

      You are welcome.

Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Previous article

One Thing Leads To Another

Next article

Tell Tale