Inanimate Compliance
I have a fascination for inanimate objects. Show me a beautiful watch with its intricate mechanism on display and I shall sit transfixed for a long time admiring the craftsmanship in this creation. I like to touch one of my favourite suits relishing the sensation of the cloth. I will hold it up pleased with the way it hangs and then of course admire how I wear it in the mirror. A sculpture, a painting, a car or a piece of jewellery. They all invite my admiration. They are items of beauty and superiority and as such firmly belong in my world. Moreover, they do exactly what I want. I love my dishwasher. It always works. I press the buttons and it obeys my commands, quietly churning away as it removes the residue from the expensive crockery. The glassware comes out shining, without streaks or marks. Each and every time. Objects are reliable. They perform as I require them to perform. I love nothing more than an appliance. It complies, it obeys and it delivers. I love possessions.
I love to possess you and make you an inanimate object. That is how I see you. You are an appliance which I expect to do as I demand.You are but an extension of me, placed here to carry out my demands and whims. I like to attach brand names to my ex-girlfriends. Becky was Zanussi – she was good at science, thus she was the appliance of science. Sarah was Nike since I had to tell her to Just Do It.(she called me Burger King – have it your way, I quite liked her).Another was Energizer as she kept going and going and going (but that’s another tale). I like to think I am Tag Heuer (Success. It’s a Mind Game).I objectify everybody and assess how they can be a good appliance to me. Once that is done I have to acquire the appliance. I have possession of you and you must act as I dictate. All my other possessions do, so why should you be any different?
3 thoughts on “Inanimate Compliance”
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I understand the wording on this article. I have read it a number of times over the past year.
I do recall a number of times over my life-time where a narcissist (especially mother, Lesser) – they had used the words “Do not move!”. I mean what? Now, I understand BUT not accept, it is actually their narcissism not “appreciating” the fact I am a person and not an ‘inanimate’ object that they can press buttons to ‘OFF’. (I am laughing as type this!). There is NO remote control to turn me off. I am not operated by batteries, nor electricity. Also it was their ‘last word’ on asserting their control (or trying to) before resorting to violence. Now, just because I am somebody that – without intention, sometimes with intention, can feel ‘threatened’ – at the time – quite easily, because I was ‘refused’ to be allowed to have my ‘own’ control from an early age – ie not really ‘permitted’ to be a child in the way nature intended me to be, with my brain-wiring. At the same time, if I instinctively felt ‘uncomfortable’, I would ‘fidget’ – just like any ‘normal’ child would do, just like any animal would do – because they are ‘unsure’ of the “situation”.
Now, I am going to refer to a young narcissist (ie one in ‘formation’ and into teenager, young adult years) – I am making my own views here, they may have also felt similar where they are sensing ‘instinctively uncomfortable’ with their ‘surroundings or the situation’ around them and this may be before they find the ‘strengths’ to ‘manipulate’ (or have ‘mastered’ the ‘art’ of their own skills in manipulating others – because they may not have, yet, ‘escaped’ their own narcissists) the immediate surroundings / situation ie it could be a very powerful ‘peer’ (parent / carer / authority figure of some kind). They may not necessarily experience ‘fear’ (sometimes, maybe), but more likely to feel anger at the ‘loss of control’ of their immediate environment. So, they ‘lash out’. Verbally, possibly self-harm in some way, thump a wall, hit their narcissist – lashing out in some way, because they are trying to ‘protect’ themselves?
So, I can understand why narcissists (more often than not, are ACONs), would prefer ‘inanimate objects’ (aka appliances) – easier to ‘control’ and in order to maintain ‘control’ of themselves as individuals = assertion of control. Only because they did not have control earlier in their lives. This ‘self-defense mechanism’ was simply ‘instilled’ by their own narcissists, or empath parents being too nice, too soft, too all-giving, too smothering (ie the ‘hippy’ type) = still can ‘create’ a LOCE = especially with the GPD being present in the DNA.
There is someone I have known since I was 7 years old. Had absolutely lovely parents, loving, supportive etc – yet both children showed narcissistic behaviours because they were very spoilt and overly ‘smothered’. The children always got their way, what they wanted – would get upset if they did not get what they wanted ie arguing with each other (almost in ‘competition’ with each other). They were not rich but ‘comfortable’. They had a son with a younger daughter. Yet the daughter attracted a narcissist male. The daughter now has children of her own (by this narcissist) and the younger one appears to have some APD to a degree (diagnosed, BUT, I strongly suspect it is “borderline” as described by HG in his work). The parents of my friend were not the type of people to say “You must enter this competition”, they were supported but not pressurised, the children enjoyed sports – bragging who was better at what – against each other. I was in my mid-twenties when I accompanied my friend and her mother to view properties outside the area we grew up in (I had already left home by then). Both parents of my friend and her brother would ‘intervene’ in arguments that I witnessed, often.
So, in my view, it is a matter of getting the ‘balance; right. Having said that, it can seem a ‘Catch 22’ situation, unless, people are educated and they get the ‘balance’ right when it comes to parenting. Practice tough love. Not too tough, not too soft either.
I am now ‘switched’ on as to what narcissism is about. A washing machine is certainly Hell of a lot easier to ‘control’ compared to me. So, in my ‘eyes’, I may be quite ‘balanced’ in my narcissistic and empath characteristics – depending on my immediate environment and who I am with. Dum de dum.
Thank you, HG, for your time (and the invaluable education). Apologies, again, for a long comment. (PS I see the ‘cane’ article as the next post…… I am not surprised 😉 )
Hi Asp Emp, your comment brings the thought that my early years were LOC also, because of the narc parents I had. Yet I became an empath. It speaks so much to the gene aspect, I am finding that side of it more and more interesting. Thank you for your thoughts here, good to read.
You have sparked my curiosity and creative thought processes – or maybe it is the small amount of Hennessy I consumed..
Would an advanced AI be the ticket? One programmed to mimic human emotion? Some smart programmer could (in the undefined future), make it so they would always provide fuel – both positive and negative – without ever running out. Or would the thought it was a machine make the AI irrelevant to your needs?
Or would a virtual world be more suited? (I had one of my lucid vivid dreams about 20 years ago now – where everyone had an extra room devoted to virtual reality). A place you could make your secret garden a mental reality – not just a metaphysical one. Would the army be NPCs? Mmmm I think I need to explore this further internally – so many branches I can see for a narc adapting – or not being able to…