Utopia. You want it. We give it to you. What you may not realise is that you are the spark of inspiration for this utopia, we are not. We allow you to design this ideal world. Interestingly, your utopias are strikingly similar. It is a place where you are loved, protected and made to feel safe. For some of you it involves the trappings of comfort and prestige. The impressive residence which has been tastefully furnished inside and is laden with the benefit of society’s technological advances. It may manifest as a wardrobe that is bursting with the beautiful and eye-catching. It may hold the sensational from the art world or the most luxurious materials that the world has created over millions of years. In other instances it may be the presentation of a cup of tea on your night stand each morning that forms part of their perfect world.

Some of you reject the material and prefer to build this utopia on a foundation which you regard as more fulfilling, more deep-seated and nourishing. A land where mutual respect is a given, the simple pleasure of a stunning sunset evoking more delight and satisfaction than anything made by Bvlgari or Bentley. You want to be cherished, desired and listened to. For some it might be the intense passion of athletic love-making before the caress of soft hands lulls you into an all-encompassing slumber. Your utopia is a place where there is no anger, no tears and peace of mind. A place where one hand fits perfectly into another and will never let it go, a hand hold that says that it is okay to be frightened but you need not be because I will always be here. It is the knowledge that if you start to fall you will be caught. The wolf will always be kept from the door and nothing lurks in the darkness.  It is a halcyon world where the scent of dill onion bread, or bacon or pancakes signifies that we are together and you never want that fragrance to ever diffuse. So many of you offer different interpretations of what constitutes your utopia yet so many themes remain the same. Love, happiness, smiles, warmth, contentment, caring, laughter and passion are recurrent.

You build this utopia. The bricks are in the words that you say when you first meet us. Those sentences over dinner become walls that create these magnificent buildings that rise upwards into the azure sky. Those whispered desires the metal girders that criss cross as the monument to our relationship takes form. The desire in your eyes creates the undulating countryside and crafts the clear rivers that run through the beautiful meadows and fields that form in  your utopia. Your touch causes ripples across the landscape, creating and nurturing as the idyll forms. Everything you say and do, every expression and every glance, every thought and act is charged with such massive potential and it is all for the greater good. It is all to build utopia. You provide us with the plans and the materials and we set to, building this perfect world. You direct us and explain what utopia looks like, smells like and feels like. We are beholden to your instruction as we merely reflect what you want. You want to be called sweetheart every time we kiss you on the cheek? We do it. You want to dance through the night to the slowest of ballads? It is done. You want to receive a loving note through your letterbox? Consider it achieved. Each and every constituent part of this utopia is created by you, all we do is take what you want and make it happen. This is what we do. We are the facilitators of your dreams. We pay such close attention to the way you design this world, taking note of what should be excluded, what must be included and ensuring that every detail is executed.

We are so dedicated in our desire to build this perfect world for you that we spend as much time as we can with you, watching and observing, so that even your mannerisms begin to be included in this grand design. We are so skilled that we absorb everything about you, every hope, every desire and every dream and weave them into this utopia so that soon it begins to form and you marvel with an open mouth at how wonderful it is. It as if every breath you exhale creates another segment of this amazing place. Each heart beat thrusts life into it, every step you take transfers energy into this wonderland, your thoughts appear as if they were being written down as we somehow interpret them and cause them to become reality. You are the architect and we are merely the construction workers who endeavour to give you what you want and boy do we deliver. Nobody can create your utopia like us. Nobody has the skill or the dedication to bring this paradise to life. Does it matter that it is a construct, made from thoughts, dreams and wishes? Of course not, it is as real to you as the screen you now stare at and the fluttering sensation in your stomach. You can see it, taste, smell it, hear it and touch it. You are amazed at how perfect it is, it almost seems too incredible but it is not because you inspired it. You provided the drawings and plans and we brought it to life.

This is utopia.

This is all that you have ever wanted.

Now we have built it for you.

Does it matter that it is an illusion?

If so, well, you started it.

3 thoughts on “Utopia

  1. SParham says:

    It is so uncomfortable to feel used and shelved when ET creeps in. What felt like a utopia suddenly feels gross. It is disgraceful to abuse trust. Especially when it does not come easily in my case. I may be an empath in life but that doesn’t mean everyone is my confidant. I don’t think that I’ll ever be capable of trusting a new person again in my friendship and work categories. I am a looong term IPPS to lesser so I’m totally ruined for that category. Fucking narcs are everywhere and their numbers are growing. 🤬

    1. A Victor says:

      SParham, when we see the reality of what they’ve done to us, it is so disgusting, even more disgusting as the horror continues to unfold. I was watching one of the YT videos yesterday, The Dynamic with the Intimate Partner Primary Source, and when HG said “belittling in front of the children” I started crying hard and for a while. It had not hit me before, just how horrible that specific abuse was. Some of the others were so much stronger and took my focus before, now that they’re dealt with I guess I will have to deal with the ones still left. It was such an offense when he did this to me, he did not participate in the childrearing and he would not ask me what the child had done if I was upset with one of them and dealing with it, he would just insist that I was wrong and overreacting and he did so right in front of them. He treated me as if I was the naughty child. It was so demeaning. Thankfully, it did not happen frequently, maybe 4-5 times in the last several years he was with us. But those times were so powerful yesterday, it brought home that he had not supported me, he had not helped me, he had not cared what the kids saw him doing to me, he was just cold, I was in the wrong in his mind, that was it. All I did was pour my life into raising those kids, I did the best I knew to do, and he criticized me, it was so hurtful. At those moments I almost hated him.

      One good thing however is that I now feel that I will be able to trust people, something I have not really been able to do before in my life, except the wrong people. Having the tools now to see the red flags and knowing how to respond if I do, I am not as distrusting of people any longer, it is very freeing. Perhaps, if you want it to be so, you will find this to be true as well.

  2. Joa says:

    Beautiful. Some words touched me. I found a few things for myself…
    I can’t cry, but something twitched there.
    It’s nice. Sometimes it’s good to come home.


    Although at the present stage, I do not need it.
    I need to focus.
    I have to decline.
    I’ll come back to that later.

Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Next article

3 Little Empaths