Razed To The Ground

RAZED-TO-THE-GROUND

 

I am the master architect. I will amaze you as I create golden cities that reflect the magnificence of our relationship. With glass and chrome I create those skyscrapers that soar high into the air as a testament to the sheer height to which I will take you. Clean, sparkling rivers run through the centre of these cities, spanned by intricate bridges. The stonework on the most elegant buildings bears the hallmark of the master craftsman that I am.

My technique and brilliance surpasses anything that you have seen before. Carefully landscaped parks and gardens provide a verdant oasis at different parts throughout these cities, a haven for flora and brought to life with the sound of birdsong. Beyond the city limits lush meadows undulate away to the imposing grandeur of mountain ranges. I keep the sky an amazing azure through out the day, save for sunset when I allow a few clouds to wisp across the horizon and contribute to the breath taking hues of red, orange, yellow and violet that I weave through the sky.

My empire is vast. It is resplendent and awe-inspiring. It is all my own work, achieved through my careful application of building something worthy of representing our relationship. It is built on the most solid of foundations, from the most reliable and durable of materials. There has been no corner cutting, no use of cheap and suspect stone, wood or steel. Nothing shall fall but instead it will prevail for ever in tribute to you and me.
Yet for all this splendour that I have single-handedly created I will take a match to it and bring about an all consuming conflagration. I want to see it engulfed in the inferno of my making. It makes no sense. There is no logic to burning down what I have created. The wanton destruction of such beauty is abhorrent and flies in the face of any reasoned individual. The flames burn with such intensity that the steel melts, sizzling drops of molten metal that scar the stone which fractures and crumbles. Glass shatters, blackened shards that collapse to the ground, the noise of destruction masked by the roar of the flames.
I will stand and watch this terrible destruction with a twisted grin on my face, my hollow eyes reflecting the shooting pillars of orange flame. You are knelt beneath me as I hold your head in my hands, forcing you to watch this display of carnage and obliteration. Your tears stream down your face, cutting through the soot that has adorned your features, the heat haze shimmering before you and your sobbing inaudible compared to the fierceness of the fire that will burn for days.
I will build you an empire and then I shall raze it to the ground.

That is my way and it shall always remain the case.

7 thoughts on “Razed To The Ground

  1. lickemtomorrow says:

    TS, I hope you don’t mind me joining you on your first ramble for the New Year 🙂

    I was interested in what you were saying because I also like to try and untangle these things from a narcissist’s perspective.

    The idea of ‘spoiling’ is a common theme among narcissists victims, and it also comes to be an expectation at times. You can imagine the control being lorded over others as they wait with baited breath for the axe to fall, all the while hoping it doesn’t. This is definitely about power and control.

    I do believe it is also about envy. The narcissist is an envious creature, not given to enjoying other people’s enjoyment (unless, of course it is centred around them), and also not given to others being happy when the narcissist themselves cannot feel happy, nor seeing others do well which the narcissist believes takes the shine off them. I don’t think we give the narc’s envy nearly enough attention sometimes. It’s constantly bubbling beneath the surface and at any moment can lash out as a means of spoiling a special moment.

    When you are talking about the psychopath it sounds like you are speaking of malice. HG has explained how malice and sadism are different (I’ll have to look it up again), but it can be difficult to make the distinction. There is probably no doubt many a psychopath has been treated cruelly in childhood and has carried that trauma with them. Many empaths have suffered similar trauma. The narcissist chooses to become the evil they have been subjected to in order to survive, but I think the psychopath is lacking in ways the narcissist is not – at least as far as their brain wiring goes. Psychopaths will be narcissistic, but at the extreme end of the narcissistic scale. They literally do not have the capability to be human in the sense that we know or understand it. That does require an ability to empathize with others. While narcissist’s cannot do this either, psychopaths, I think, are the apex predators in the human jungle. I’m going to guess we may at times have thought we were dealing with a narcissist when really we have been dealing with a psychopath.

    Definitely think we need more clarity around this topic and part of the problem might be that psychopaths are generally also narcissists – where does one move on the scale to be classified a psychopath? It obviously doesn’t have to mean murder. Many top Exec’s are psychopaths. I’m going to have to go digging a little further down this rabbit hole as I’m sure I’ve researched before but obviously didn’t take in all the necessary information.

    Thanks for kickstarting the musing for the New Year, TS <3 xox

    I'm sure HG is thrilled 😉

    1. Truthseeker6157 says:

      LET!

      Haha! Yay! And here we go! First of all, a big hug and wishes that you have a great 202. Xx

      Yes, that’s a really great point. Envy will come into the spoiling aspect. There is the spoiling of ‘things’, the possessions of others, own possessions, the spoiling of events, the spoiling of a moment. When I think of the narcissist I relate these to fuel and control as the motivating factors. If I really try to reach and feel the psychopath, it feels different. I think there are definitely times where the destruction, or the spoiling of something will be done for similar reasons to the narcissist, in the psychopath’s case, for control, to take one step closer to achieving an objective with some benefit to the psychopath. These benefits might be very slight, but they’ll still orchestrate elaborate moves for small but growing gains. So, very similar, but I think there are other instances where as you say it’s just to do with malice, ( you found the better word there).

      You might be right, statistically, we have interacted with a psychopath and not known. I have one candidate in mind, a boss at where I used to work. Ironically, he was a protector for me, but he did keep a hit list of people he would systematically work to get rid of. He gradually worked through the list and the game was a long one, but one by one, he got them out. He was lovely to me but he did feel different.

      Psychopaths want to spoil because they just want to spoil. That’s my view. An extreme representation would be the psychopath serial killer who mutilates the body of his victim. Something whole is broken and spoiled. It isn’t destruction. That was the killing part. The spoiling is the mutilation part. I steer away from the serial killer psychopath, the portrayals are unhelpful and represent a tiny minority of the psychopath group, but I think that example demonstrates what I mean.

      I think the corporate psychopath has higher grandiosity, higher superiority, higher IQ, less impulsivity, lower tendency towards physical violence. He would view the prison psychopath as an idiot for getting caught, and far too basic in style. To destroy psychologically requires a longer and more involved game. It’s subtle, he sees it as an art, the master sculptor or painter. More insidious, step, by step, by step. I think it’s the grandiosity and superiority that are the differentiators. Similarly, conscientiousness. It has to be high or they wouldn’t be successful.

      I can differentiate between a psychopath and an unaware narcissist. I find it far more tricky to differentiate between a psychopath and a Greater narcissist. To understand one, is to better understand the other. The key differentiator appears to be the Machiavellian aspect. Greaters do have this too though. I have found other differences, or think I have but these differences are still listed more as traits. Essentially, I want to understand how it feels. I’m trying bloody hard to get a fix on that. I can’t understand it if I can’t visualise or feel it. That’s both empath and INFJ. I don’t do facts and lists, I sense.

      Using the narc and envy as an example, the envy spurs the narcissist on. Envious of another’s car or promotion at work, this pushes the narc to do something about it. I get that. I have narcissistic traits, I feel envy. So a basic example for me as an empath, and I’ll admit to this, vanity involved here too. Let’s imagine somebody new walks in to the gym, female, my age. First time seeing her. I’ll compare myself to the new arrival, physique wise. If I have the fitter physique, or am stronger, then I’m content. If not, I’m pissed. So I get it. Similar to the narc, I might decide to do that run in the rain that afternoon, so the envy motivates. The difference is, I’ll chat to the new arrival, I decide I like her, the evaluation, comparison etc disappears from that point on. We might meet for coffee after, I admire rather than envy how good she looks, I genuinely want her to feel and look good, competition and envy is completely gone. So the empathy overrides the envy for me, which doesn’t happen to the narcissist. I can feel and understand envy, because I know how envy feels to me.

      I can’t understand malice. If there is malice, then the malice came from somewhere. It either has a purpose, or it’s a result of something, it evolved into malice. So where does it come from? Malice isn’t an absence of something, it’s an addition of something. I can’t identify with it but that is a defining feature of the psychopath. I experience rage, extremely rare but I can light up the room when I kick off. That rage is a reaction to hurt. In my case it is. Betrayal would cause me to draw in emotion, not transmit. Rage comes from hurt and frustration, it’s a sense of me being helpless to change something. That causes the unbridled rage. So I have to assume that malice is rooted somewhere similar.

      This is what research doesn’t say. It gives a list of behaviours. Good oh, clear as mud!

      I have wandered around a bit here, it’s you though, I know you’ll get the train of thought.

      Xx

  2. Truthseeker6157 says:

    It’s funny this article should come up. I was thinking about this a few nights ago. The urge to spoil.

    In the context of the narcissist I see this as essentially a means to gain fuel and in some circumstances control. The empath attaches herself to things, people, places, tokens, souvenirs etc. She does this as a means to remember. Remove the souvenirs and she remembers less, or is less often reminded to remember.
    Destroy a home, holiday or wedding photographs, smash a loved grandmother’s watch and the narcissist receives fuel from the empath’s distress, or the threat of this destruction secures control. This seems clear to me. I get the thinking behind the destruction. As twisted as it is.

    When I look at the psychopath though, for some reason I get a sense of something different. It’s an urge to spoil just because the psychopath wants to spoil. I can’t exactly explain why I think that, it’s just a general sense of a different motivation and not necessarily to do with control. Spoiling for the sake of spoiling. I’d say sadistic but sadism implies the harming of someone else. I don’t think it always is that. I also don’t think it’s a desire to self harm. So what actually is a desire to spoil, to de-pretty or to ruin?

    I think it’s possible that somewhere in the past the psychopath was punished, criticised, admonished, for spoiling. “Look what you did! You always ruin everything! Take your filthy hands off the tablecloth. You’re disgusting!” Something similar. The grown psychopath spoils then, simply because he can. There’s an element of that in there I think.

    It feels how I imagine fury to feel. Fury without a threat to control present and without a real objective though. Not fuel, not control, just fury. Setting fires. That is a marker for psychopathy and again, fire consumes and spoils. In SC a neighbour’s house burnt down. When it was put out, it was just a blackened half shell. Burnt houses look so very eerie. There’s a real vacuum that you can feel as you look at them. A real emptiness. The loss of something that once was. There are echoes of that in the psychopath. I heard smoking described as an affirmation of life. Fire setting is an outwards representation of death I think. An expression of emptiness, rage, distress in a way, an internal scream that no one hears and the psychopath never consciously admits to.

    It could be power, maybe. The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away. The psychopath’s self affirmation of power. An element of that perhaps in the destruction part. Spoiling though, spoiling is different to destruction. Spoiling is vengeful and filled with rage.

    The more I read about psychopathy and it’s various aspects, the more I think specialists, researchers, psychologists just follow the textbook. You tick the boxes, you’re a psychopath. Agree, to an extent, but there’s no real intuition into how it feels, where these various elements come from and why they differ between psychopaths. There just doesn’t seem to be any real understanding of the thinking behind the psychopath. To me, there are far more layers to psychopathy than are ever discussed.

    My first ramble of 2022!

  3. WhoCares says:

    On the topic of fire, HG – is that something you will write more on in the distant future or the near future?

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Later this year.

      1. WhoCares says:

        Nice!
        Thanks for answering.

      2. Asp Emp says:

        Looking forward to those, HG 🙂

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