Narc Magnet

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You are a magnet. You attract our kind. You have done so at least once and you will continue to do so. Again and again. There is no hope for anything else. As an empath, super empath or co-dependent you radiate with the traits which draw us to you. Hitherto you had no awareness that this was the case. You would enter a room and be oblivious to the heads that turned your way as our kind detected your presence. You would have noticed that you were receiving the attention of people, but back then you had no knowledge of who was engaging with you or why that was the case. You have several sets of traits which appeal to us. These are the empathic traits, the class traits and the special traits. It is your empathic traits which stand out most of all.

These are evident in the way that you behave, the words you say, the gestures you use and the expressions that form on your face. The way your interact with people, the way you look about a room, the way you walk, the way you sit, the place you decide to sit and so many other things indicate to us your empathic nature. In the same way that everything we do is marked with the taint of our narcissism, everything that you do is stamped with the essence of your empathic traits.

When you walk into the hunting ground of our kind, you are identified promptly as exhibiting potential. It as if you give off a fuel signature, like some kind of scent which our kind smells and recognises as soon as you come near. You once did not see the Lesser as he leant against the bar and noticed you as soon as you entered the premises, his eyes fixed on you as he observed your entrance. The Mid-Ranger would look up from where was sat and find himself drawn to you, that unmistakable essence which you give off, being picked up and identified. Both Lesser and Mid-Range would not know why they wanted to engage with you save that they felt a compulsion to do so.

This need arises in the same way that a lion knows that it is hungry and therefore it must find some prey. The Lesser and the Mid-Ranger’s antennae twitch as you the empath walk through the bar. They are alerted to your presence and then they will watch and pick up on the other indicators which tell them what you are.

The Greater sees you and knows what you are. His lascivious grin indicative of the thoughts which are running through his mind as he begins to assess your suitability. You are signalling to him who you are, that you are empathic, that fuel is passing him by and an opportunity has presented itself.

Once upon a time you were oblivious. You walked through this den of narcissistic intent, unaware of the parasitic creatures that waited to climb down from their waiting perches so that they could engage with you, coil about you and draw you into their web with their silver-tongues and charm. You just thought they were being pleasant, polite and taking an interest. You had no idea how much danger you were in as you allowed your empathic traits to shine like a beacon. Each and every day you radiated these traits, issuing a sub-conscious “come and get me” to our kind. How good it felt to receive this attention. How pleasant it was to be courted in this manner.

As our kind picked up on your empathic scent and were drawn to you, they sought additional confirmations, assessing your class traits and hopefully special traits too, through a combination of instinct and design, dependent on which school of narcissist you had engaged with.

You do this as as easily as you inhale and exhale. Your traits are imprinted on you and they are indelible. They are part of your core and you cannot remove them. You cannot flick a switch and turn off these empathic traits. They are you. Imagine you will if some kind of glasses were created which allowed a physical representation of your empathic traits as hues of red light. If one donned those glasses and looked into this hunting ground as above, a bar perhaps, then one would see several things.

First there would be the normals who would have a slight red glow about them, indicating some empathic traits but limited in number and extent. There would be the dark and empty spaces which are where our kind lurk, the empathic traits completely devoid. Next one would see the dancing trails of scarlet and rose that signify the empath. The roaring flames of riotous red which blaze and indicate the presence of the super empath and then the supernova of bright red which is the signature of the co-dependent. As your gaze swept the room, one would see these differing hues and varying intensity, all indicative of the ever present empathic traits.

It is impossible for you to become incognito. You are unable to remove your empathic traits. You cannot switch them off and pass undetected. Accordingly, you will always stand out to our kind. You will always be identifiable, you will be seen and therefore if our kind is in the vicinity, whether physically proximate or through the accessibility of technology, we will be drawn to you. Like sharks which scent blood, like the hungry dog which smells meat, we pick you out and converge on you in anticipation of the fuel that will flow from you.

You will aways be a magnet for our kind. You have been created with empathic traits and you will always keep them. You will remain that beacon which we see and flock to. You will always attract us.

Of course you may learn to dampen down the manifestation of your empathic traits by altering some of your behaviours. Certain actions, words and gestures might be reduced, lessened and altered to reduce the extent of the empathic traits which you exhibit, but your traits always shine through and you cannot maintain this cloaking for long. It is contrary to who you are how you conduct yourself. Your empathic traitsΒ are so extensive that even when you have suffered the beasting at our hands and mouths, that when you have been drained, numbed and exhausted, the empathic traits will remain.

The empath will not shine with them as brightly and following the full horror of the devaluation and discard,t he empath will not function with such an obvious display of empathic traits because the brutality of the treatment will cause some diminution in function and display.

The super empath will continue to display these empathic traits because this person has the capacity to endure so much and then still have sufficient function to escape what has happened, once there is the eventual realisation as to what has happened. Once the super empath has had enough, they will seek their escape and their empathic traits continue to shine brightly.

The co-dependent, no matter how brow-beaten, how ground into the dirt he or she is, will continue to exhibit those empathic traits because the co-dependent would rather give you his or her last breath rather than take it for themselves. They continue to give, even when there seems there is nothing more that can be taken and thus their empathic traits remain on display.

This is why it is so often the case that you are almost passed from one of our kind to another. You are discarded but your empathic traits remain evident and thus another of our kind flocks to you, ready to gorge on the fuel which is generated by your empathic traits. Even if you escape, you continue to signal your suitability to us. You are unable to do anything other than stand out in this way.

It is only when you have gained the insight and understanding into knowing who it is that you keep attracting and why, that you finally learn what to watch out for. You cannot change what you are, indeed, why should you? What you can alter is your ability to identify us when we make that bee-line for you. As you radiate empathic traits, we also exhibit the narcissistic traits which once understood and once recognised in the behaviour of the everyday, mean you finally see and take notice of the red flags, flashing lights and blaring klaxons which herald this danger.

You will always be destined to be a magnet for us. That will never change. We will flock to you, be attracted to you and seek you out, our instincts seeking that scent of the empath which tells us that our needs will be met and fuel will be provided.

You will draw our interest and attention because the empathic traits flow from you. You will, once you gain the knowledge and understanding, know who it is who has joined you at the bar and flashed you that winning smile and then you can the seize the power.

14 thoughts on “Narc Magnet

  1. Joa says:

    I am not Magnet.
    I don’t dress fashionably. I can wear the same jacket 6 years.
    I stopped painting my face.
    I’m mean (in my opinion).
    I try to live on the sidelines.
    I try not to be conspicuous.

    Irrelevant.
    Someone is always sticking to me like velcro.
    And no one backs off.

    The meaner I am, the worse (?).

    ‐——–

    Today I heard a very nice thing: “Whatever you do, it’s impossible not to like you.”

    It embarrassed me. The first natural reaction.
    And it made me happy. We’ll see if this barrier can withstand triple slander and blackmail. I’m curious myself… πŸ™‚

    Whatever happens, I’ll understand. I keep telling everyone to take care of themselves.

  2. Bubbles says:

    Dear Mr Tudor,
    Even with my resting bitch face, I still attract πŸ˜’
    πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚
    Luv Bubbles xx 😘

    1. Leigh says:

      Dear Bubbles,
      That made me laugh out loud! LOL! πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£πŸ˜‚

      1. Bubbles says:

        Dearest Leigh,
        The funny thing is …it’s true.
        I’m pleased you had a laugh, makes me happy 😊
        I sometimes crack myself up, at my age, it’s more my dry skin if I don’t moisturise 🀣
        I wonder if Liz Arden’s 8 hour cream will do the trick πŸ˜‚
        Luv Bubbles xx 😘

        1. Leigh says:

          Dearest Bubbles,
          The thought of you with resting bitch face seems so diametrically opposed to me, I couldn’t help but laugh out loud. You’re so Bubbly, I can’t even imagine it.

          1. Bubbles says:

            Dearest Leigh,
            Haha ta lovely 😊
            I’m going to buy some anti pheromone spray seeing as my RBF doesn’t work πŸ˜’
            I’ll give the Suss Exes a buzz and see which brand they’re using πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£
            Luv Bubbles xx 😘

          2. Leigh says:

            Dearest Bubbles,
            MM resting bitch face is extra bitchy and super scary too! If it helps keep the narcs away, maybe I’ll try it too! LOL!

  3. Grace says:

    Thanks to HG I am able to sniff out Narcs, sometimes already by reading what they write to me and about themselves and what others write about them πŸ™‚
    Thanks to HG I am able to use my “powers” now more and more conciously and I can also see why I am still attracted to certain Narcs or narcissistic people. And I can see my own narcissistic traits and use them for self protection or “justice”. What a self empowerment!
    It is a year now and my life changed so much.
    Thank you so much HG, you are such a great inspiration!

  4. Anna says:

    I didn’t realise this. I used to joke I was a “weirdo” magnet as people would just come up and talk to me. On the bus, train, queing (waiting in line).

    I just thought it was because I was naiive and some said I am gullible. I wonder now if the diagnosis I was given in my teens is correct to what I suffer from. Beginning to doubt it. Still labelling is bad I guess. All of us are just trying to survive as best we can.

  5. Av says:

    I’m still full of fury inside for the abuse (2016).
    I use this fury converting it in positive energy… in order to be functional.
    When I meet a narc (I detect her-him very soon by instict & observation) I start immediately to show my narc traits. Sometime I tend to display subitle arrogance, in order to make them perceive that I’m not a good target. Generally it works. But in some cases they insist and with the time my empathic traits come…When they start to become dominant or try to humiliate me I tend to become verbally aggressive (or passive-aggresive.)

    1. A Victor says:

      Hi Av, I’m AV also, aka A Victor, nice to see your comment, it is an interesting suggestion, especially if you are unable to go NC for this reason or that. Nice meeting you!

  6. Ladyandearlgray says:

    Just left a narc boyfriend of two years. Not the first; hopefully the last. Single for 3 months, and now to go through narc drama at work . At least now I know what is going on and can spot it from a mile away. Sometimes I just want to hide away to avoid it. But in the end, the only option is to learn and face it as HG has instructed.

  7. amarantha44 says:

    Well hell. I thought it was because I used to be pretty.

    1. Truthseeker6157 says:

      Amarantha,

      You can be both πŸ™‚

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