Knowing the Narcissist : Fuel
Are you involved with someone whose behaviour makes no sense to you? Does this person treat you with kindness one moment and spiteful hatred the next? Does this individual flirt with others despite being in a relationship with you? Is he or she boastful, arrogant and always fishing for compliments?
Does this person seem to revel in provoking other people, angering them or upsetting them, yet you cannot work out why this person acts in this way? The answers lie in this book. The driving force behind these strange and upsetting behaviours all comes down to fuel.
Read about what fuel is, how it makes that person feel, why they need it, how they get it and what your role is in supplying them with fuel. Learn all about fuel and you will question his or her behaviour no longer and you will be armed with information to do something about it and protect yourself and those you care about.
3 thoughts on “Knowing the Narcissist : Fuel”
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Very helpful title. Thank you, Mr. Tudor.
Fuel, paragraph 2, sentence 12: “Our fuel tank never shows as full, it cannot overflow…” — So a famous narcissist would have 10 million tertiary sources…and social media gives them better access to each other…
1. So their tank is bigger?
2. If they go boom, and lose 8 million of those followers, the tank doesn’t immediately shrink, does it?
3. Is there a relative adjustment period?
4. Do NISSs and IPPSs have to work harder for that period of time?
5. Is the time of adjustment related more to the school of narcissist than other factors?
6. How does the loss of millions of tertiary sources affect a narcissist’s sense of control?
Fuel, page 37, full paragraph one — That would be interesting to hear more about, how you changed the way you were doing things to get to a more efficient fuel matrix design, what made you realize that it would be better to do so…specifics
7. Does a quality fuel source require more extensive effort to create? Metaphorically, you’re more interested in creating “Starry Night” or “Mona Lisa” than being someone who hangs paint balloons on a canvas and throws darts at them to create art?
The point system you have is absolutely fantastic and really helps with perspective.
8. Can family members downgrade themselves by being in very low contact?
“The Loss of the Prison” — Very distressing to read, but necessary to know about. I don’t like to think about anything being able to hurt you, sir. And you, HG, have so many strengths that I don’t think any creature could ever hurt you. You have multiple degrees (as I recall). You are a best selling author in nonfiction and fiction. You recently reached 100,000,000 views on YouTube. You have helped myriads of people escape from abusive situations with your work. Your 100K subscriber interviews and the Successful Escapes series amply demonstrate your effectiveness. I’ve also read the reviews here, and read the other bloggers. I’m sure you have many professional awards that I don’t know about. You’re incredibly intelligent and clever. You’re astonishingly observant.
Thank you so much for all that you do and all the time that you share with your readers. It’s a gift, a wonderful gift.
1. Their fuel matrix is larger.
2. Their fuel matrix alters.
3. It occurs commensurate with the loss.
4. See Understanding Changes to the Fuel Matrix.
5. See 4.
6. It is a substantial threat to control, although if they lose 4 million out of 80 million followers the threat is reduced. It is relative.
7. Not necessarily.
8. They become problematic with regard to the amount of fuel provided, the frequency of doing so and also threaten control.
Thank you so much, sir. Much appreciated!