The Emotional Impact of the Works of HG Tudor
I have written hundreds of blog articles and over fifty books. This has provided a wealth of information about narcissism and also about me, HG Tudor. There is more to come. I would like you to share with me and your fellow commenters about those articles or aspects from my books which have had a particular emotional impact on you. In particular, I would like you to consider and detail :-
- Which made you sad?
- Which made you angry?
- Which made you think “aha!”
- Which made you laugh?
- Which made you happy?
I look forward to reading your responses.
50 thoughts on “The Emotional Impact of the Works of HG Tudor”
Vent Your Spleen! (Please see the Rules in Formal Info)
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HG, many of your works have stirred very unpleasant emotions in me. I have laughed and cried all at the same time. And to be honest with you, at times I could cut off your colleonis and feed them to the dogs. Sorry for being over dramatic, but that’s how some of your articles make me feel.
Mr. Tudor–
1. Which made you sad?
“The Birthday Blues,” “6 Silent Soul Destroyers,” anything about silent treatments, pity plays, sympathy symphonies, triangulation…
They make me sad because I am reflecting upon myself, what I allowed, what I put up with. They sometimes make me angry with myself. I had people telling me when I would talk about the poor behavior of the person to genuine friends that I was dealing with a selfish, self-centered person. I didn’t want to believe them. Narcissism wasn’t a word in their main vocabulary. The cognitive dissonance in me was quite strong. I couldn’t separate out the rotten tomato polluting my strawberry mango smoothie, but I kept taking big gulps and saying, “It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything is fine.” (Even as I become Freaked out, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional as a result this person’s behavior.) I reread some of them on occasion (as you repost or when I select from a folder in my email of those that I keep on hand) to help myself. I think of the narcissistic relationships I have had as being like rotten logs. They are important in what I have learned…but your articles function in a way like all the organisms that break down the log…and now I have good soil to do something with…and I don’t yet know what.
2. Which made you angry? “The Key to Entry” — Your anger can not go unfelt by an empath reading that one (in my opinion). It would be interesting to hear a narration. It’s almost suffocating in the intensity. I was just so angry on your behalf. As I read, I wanted to just sit and listen as you release all the fury that’s inside in the hope that there would be some release or healing that comes after. It’s the ending that sends a tingle up my spine, of fear (for those who put you there) and satisfaction (for you, knowing that you’re addressing the situation in the way that will best help you). It’s your phrasing and your word choices at the end that do that. I can’t help wondering what your Machiavellian mind came up with to engage with Dr. M in following sessions and if he ended up with the rest of the family there for a group session. (I’ve not encountered much of Dr. M in your work.) I also wish that I had a little of your Machiavellianism at times when dealing with problematic people in my life.
I was very angry in the Educating HG episode where you were spanked by the headmaster. It’s the hypocrisy of it. (Yes, I know that corporal punishment happened.) It was also the fear of wondering what happened when matrinarc found out, too. I just wanted to gather you up and take you away from that, which is what your father should have done. The way it seemed like you began planning in a way for what you knew would happen and were resigned to the fact that it would…was almost as chilling as the end where you see the headmaster’s car in the parking lot. That part just sat in my stomach horribly.
3. Which made you think “aha!” — “What Happens When The Narcissist Realizes You Have Them Figured Out?” — This one I listened to it several times at the beginning. I found it after calling a (now former) friend. Instead of complaining and wondering what was wrong with me during that call…as regarding problematic familial relationships, I was finally pointing out that maybe I wasn’t the problem. I started telling her about your work, sir, how much I was learning. She listened, then said that “I could have told you everything you’ve learned from him…but I didn’t tell you because you weren’t ready.” (With great manipulative powers comes no responsibility. – I learned that from you, sir.) She called you “evil.” (I had already listened to Dark Angel. – Excellent listening/reading. It had already conjured in my mind an image I associate with part of your internal response to those epitaphs.) She said she could help me later, but she had to go at that time (to a bar). (She’s very sensitive. It’s upsetting to be around loud noises and strange lighting…that’s why she goes to bars so frequently.)
I remember having a weird feeling, and then going to listen to many videos…though ignoring the one that would prove to be another huge “aha!” That video was the “Borderline is not what you think.” Well, we resumed the conversation later. It devolved further…there was a meltdown with an implied “You shouldn’t watch anything he makes!” Not six months earlier…this person told me, “no one should get to pick what YouTube videos you watch except you. That’s controlling behavior. Not acceptable.” I retranslated that message more accurately as, “You should let me choose for you. You should listen to me. I know everything.” I sent an apology the next day because I thought that I’d misunderstood something…I got zero response to the apology. I didn’t have contact for almost six months.
The big difference in me was that I didn’t try to follow-up or further explain anything. I decided to not engage. Thanks to your work, I recognized the way this pattern had festered and how I had helped it along with my responses. I had only, one other time, just stopped messaging for a prolonged period, five months. This time, I had a goal. I wanted to try to establish a new pattern, a more mutual one. I was hurt by her behavior, not surprised by it. I knew the pattern. I wanted to see if it broke. It didn’t.
It was shortly after my birthday (that was ignored as usual)…that I reached out again to try to see what was happening. I told myself a silent treatment was the worst that would happen. It was highly likely to happen. I told myself I could handle that with grace, backed by the knowledge from you.
NOT SURPRISE!
I got a silent treatment, for five-six days. I sent a few messages then paused for a few days…then a “hello?” Then I got comfort crumbs, from someone who repeatedly told me that I was the sibling they had always wanted, and a nonsensical explanation for why I was ignored. I responded politely to her response…and I have not heard from her again. (If this is how she treats someone viewed as a sister, I’d hate to be painted black…oh wait, that’s when she whines and cries to her mom and boyfriends about whoever done her wrong. I’ve watched it repeatedly. I know.) I had a long think about the friendship after I got over a plethora of bad feelings. I decided to send no more texts if that was the behavior I was destined to intermittently receive. I haven’t heard from her since, and I’m hurt by how little I matter, not surprised. You zap the surprise, killing it like Raid kills cockroaches. I miss what I thought I had…not what was real.
I encountered “What Happens When The Narcissist Realizes You Have Them Figured Out?” again recently. I can’t help wondering if that is what happened—if I inadvertently said, in some way, to this person’s mind “I’m on to you.” I don’t know if she’s a narcissist. I haven’t done a narc detector. I don’t know if I want to relive it enough to fill one out. I don’t know if it matters in one way…I won’t contact her again—even if the results showed she was something different. Her behavior was bad for me…and I would be shocked if it was not colored by addiction and emotional thinking. I would guess she repeatedly exhibited around 15-20 of the behaviors you outline in “Manipulated.” I was her friend for more than 10 years. And what I shared here was just the last interaction. I’ve shared others around on your blog.
I would love to know your thoughts on whether you would guess her to have subconsciously picked up on danger. Is this how a MRN would respond? (If she is a narc, she’s midrange, probably MMR.)
4. Which made you laugh? — The Three Little Empaths. I love the voices that you do for the characters. I also love the third little empath…who sent the greater narcissist to isolation…and then HG’s praising text to her at the end…made me want to hear/read that “HG approves” from you.
The Sugars videos…those are hilarious!
The video about what TOW would do to upstage the funeral that you made with circus music.
The video of TOW/This One walking into the church with porn music playing.
The first video I listened to of yours. You had a 2-3 minute haughty assertion of control to the sugars. I wish I could re-listen to it. I didn’t laugh at the time…and it was a serious and fair point that you made…but your behavior and the way you put it out there…I wondered what was wrong with you. I also wanted to hear more. Because I agreed with your assessment…that you didn’t say anything racist and anyone who claimed you had was proving that they hadn’t listened.
I would like to add:
“Forever Wrong Upon the Throne” — I feel loss and strength are coiled together like a strawberry swirl ice cream when I read it. They work together, both enhancing the experience of the other without overpowering anything. Each bite is exactly the same, vanilla ice cream with the perfect swirl of strawberry fruit. It’s you letting us see behind your stoicism while appearing stoic (not sure if that’s the perfect word). It’s very beautiful and powerfully written. When read in tandem with other articles…it’s very moving and inspiring in ways. I like the articles that are more deeply about you and written like this one…it’s an exhibition of your skill as a writer and your self knowledge to produce unrivaled pieces of self-examination.
I have felt many things in response to your work. I have felt emotions that I don’t think I could without your work and your skill in communicating and sharing that information. Some I don’t know if I want to elaborate about publicly.
I wish you a Happy Birthday Month. May your birthday bring all flocking to fulfil the prime aims and necessary triad in all ways that you need.
Thank you for everything that you do, sir. My appreciation and gratitude are forever yours.
Thank you for your comprehensive response, Dani.
Hi Dani,
It sounds like Mr. Tudor threatened your former friend’s control over you. I’m glad you were able to escape her!
I think it’s highly probable, Leigh.
Which made me sad/happy? Your honesty makes me happy and sad at the same time. Whilst it makes me happy that you are powerful and well fuelled I can’t help but also empathise with the broken hearts which were left behind and will be left behind and that makes me sad. But then I think of the good of the golden periods, or about all the people who were saved and were helped and that makes me happy. I think about your own heart in all of this and if it’s broken in too many pieces and that’s why it must remain on ice and no fire ignited near it. No happy without sad in your case, sir.
Which made me angry? What do you have to offer? Stubborn primitive stupidity makes me angry. Nothing about you or your work is stupid or primitive. Stupid comments or primitive opinions about you make me angry, but then it’s me who is stupid in paying attention and reacting to those isn’t it?!
Which made me think “aha!”. When you explain the presence of the abyss inside and that the sustenance is fleeting, when the feeling nullifies pushing the narcissist to seek out fuel and prime aims as a constant.
About the psychopath the ‘what if’ and that there is almost no boundary to that driver. What it makes me realise is that unbalanced to the maximum this particular driver is responsible for the destructive “creations” made in the absence of empathy. Without empathy the ‘what if’ is directed to the detriment of nature where the needs of tech driven interest may be satisfied so life is made into an artificial “safe” bubble but the balance of all nature and human’s connection and rightful place in it becomes erased. It was the ‘what if’-absent-empathy-driver which made a leap from the spear to the atomic bomb possible, in the hands of those who do not care.
Artificial creations are not a measurement for advancement. The purity of water, air and soil – is. Human’s logical link to nature – is. Intelligences’ mission is to recognise it.
The problem with boredom is another thing which was an “aha!”. I understood its purpose, I think. Boredom is pointing at something which is missing because it doesn’t exist yet. Boredom is the driver to find. Love is the inspiration to create. Without love it’s only the ‘what if’ and it’s incomplete.
Which made me laugh? Your comedic talent, your parodies, your rapid wit makes me laugh! Narc Island particularly made me laugh a lot. Sometimes you don’t intend to be funny but you still are which I love even more, for instance in interviews and conversations. Your priceless talent, speed of wit and accuracy always put a smile on my face, sir! Great ability!
Thank you for sharing, JG.
My pleasure, sir! Thank you for reading! Thank you for giving the opportunity to communicate with you! To ask questions and provide feedback! The impact of your work is unprecedented in reality. In fact I could think and contemplate all day long about it, that’s how engaging and involving it is and makes me see the world through the lense of your impact!
The 3 that got away (I think it’s called) made me so angry! Especially with one of the women (she hardly “got away” did she!) I was fuming, you was called the C word in my head
It was fuel and I think no contact that scared the shit out of me! You said something about stalking ex’s at their place of work, I was like “this is too much for me! I don’t have the energy” and I went no contact with an ex straight away after reading that
Visceral responses and they motivated you to make a logical move.
My Emotional Impact of the Works of HG Tudor
Which made me sad? SPOILER ALERT – THERE’S INFORMATION THAT’S ONLY AVAILABLE IN THE LOGIC BULLETIN, The Three That Got Away. PLEASE DON’T READ THIS IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE SPOILED.
The Three That Got Away – specifically the story of your former IPPS, Karen.
Reading the story of Karen’s demise made me incredibly sad. I read it again last night and I cried again. You regarded her demise as an escape, as if it was her choice. It was the first time I realized the depth of your callousness.
Which made you angry?
I Smell Victim – The first time I read it, I wanted to throat punch you. You wrote, “My way is more sophisticated.” My first thought after reading that was, “and more insidious”.
You wrote, “The capacity for exploitation of this individual is unlimited. The vulnerable are there to be exploited.” Even though this angered me too. I needed to hear it. We all need to hear it. I won’t allow myself to be exploited or vulnerable!
Which made you think “aha!”
I’ve had so many aha moments but I’m going to reference the most powerful one for me. You just said it again yesterday.
“Every interaction between a narcissist and a person (or potential interaction) is a manipulation because it is always self-serving to the narcissist and invariably premised on something that is misleading (even if not malign) concerning the other person.”
Some people think if some of the interactions with the narc are benign, they must not be a narc. Not me because I’ve learned from the best. To remind myself, I often repeat the following, “Every interaction with a narcissist, malign or benign, is a manipulation. Period, the end!”
Which made you laugh?
The Covid Soundbites – We had no idea what was going on in the world. But somehow you found a way to bring humor into it. I know I was scared out of my mind but reading those soundbites helped me relax a little and laugh.
Which made you happy?
You make me happy! I’m gonna get sappy now. You’ve given me clarity, validation and most importantly hope. I know, I know. Hope dies last, but I don’t care. You gave me my life back. Thank you, Mr. Tudor.
You are welcome Leigh and thank you for sharing your thoughts.
⚠️!!SPOILER ALERT!!⚠️
Hello Leigh,
The three that got away made me very sad, too, and also, a bit angry and shocked. I was expecting to read 3 stories of brave women who found a strength to escape him. Kind of Hollywood happy ending thing. Not those stories. I was listening to it and the last story, about Katen, hit me hard. I began to cry, too. I felt so sorry for her and Kay, as well. Next day, I’ve decided maybe HG is lying to us, and it’s not true, and they did escape. Such thought gave me some comfort.
But if those stories did happen, it is heartbreaking to listen to them. I read it too, as well, cause I couldn’t pick up on some words. As I recall, a reading version has a few more sentences, that is missing in audio one.
Hi Arya,
I believe it. To not believe it would be my emotional thinking. I have to see Mr. Tudor as the predator that he is. I couldn’t listen to them though. Reading the stories were tough. I thought listening would feel like torture.
Oh Leigh, I absolutley had myself at your comment “I wanted to throat punch you” He he he!
Dear HG and other commenters,
I have some of HG’s books and some of HG’s articles/ series on my list.
Which made me sad?
The book that made me said was; SITTING TARGET, and it made me sad because it made me realize why I was targeted, how easy I was to spot, that my abuse was used against me and made me an easier target, that I announce who I am and can’t completely put a lid on it…that the person I loved so deeply wasn’t who they really were without the mask. It was devastating to read, but the truth was as plain as black and white..
The series that made me sad was all of the ASYLUM OF THE GROTESQUE SERIES, because of the pain they all the women went through and I felt sad for HG because none of them made HG feel content and happy…and then I learned HG can’t feel happy, or content. That knowledge also made me sad. I felt sadness for both the women and for HG. Neither one got what they wanted from the other.
Which made me angry?
KNOWING HG SERIES 1-9, because learning about HG’s childhood and what he went through made me angry for him. What he went through and then HG’s Dad’s reaction to it all. It really pissed me off!
Which made me think aha!
The book that I related to the most was CHAINED, because it explained so much to me about how I attach to people, why I attach to them, the dynamic of my childhood, why I beat myself up, why I fight myself, why it hurts so much when I lose love ones to death etc. It explained so much I needed to understand. It was a true breakthrough into my own thoughts and feelings about myself. It was THE book with most of the answers I was looking for to explain majority of my self doubts and self rejections.
Which made me laugh? The COOKIE JAR article! The story about HG, with his siblings, his grandmother and so yummy cookies! It was funny and HG was adorable to read about as a little kid. His antics with getting majority of the cookies, without doing any chores for a single one! 😄 It had me laughing so hard picturing all those cookies in HG’s little kid hands. So clever and adorable, little HG! 😄
Which made me Happy?
The article, BURN, BURN JUST FOR ME, because I was happy for HG to be successful at getting back at one adult who insulted him and he meant to be insulting to HG. I felt happy for HG, he got his payback cashed!
The Knowledge Vault item called, HG MAULS YOUR NARCISSIST. Getting an audio recording of HG mauling LMRSnarc from work was the best, funniest thing to hear! That made me so happy! It was like HG was roasting him in front of me! It was entertaining, funny and very liberating! It made me very happy!
Thank you HG! Xx❤️❤️
Rebecca,
The Cookie Jar article made me laugh too! Mr. Tudor was sneaky little rascal, lol!
Leigh,
I could totally picture HG being sneaky around the kitchen…..😄…HG? Did you tiptoe? 😄xx
No, I levitate.
Dear HG,
You used the darkside of the force and levitated to the cookie jar. Dark mission accomplished! 😄😄 You’re very funny, HG! Xx
Dear HG,
I don’t think my message made it…error…anyway, I will write it again and if it goes through…oopsey for me …xx
You used the darkside of the force and leviated to the cookie jar and your dark mission was acconplished! Xx 😄
Oh, it did go through…can you delete the one I just sent to you, please HG? Xx
I remember laughing at that one too! Sneaky little rascal lol.
Jade,
Those cookies didn’t have a chance! 😄😄xx
Hehe 😂
But… it is a common closing argument in criminal cases involved living a death by circumstantial evidence. I have seen it used many times in criminal trials…
Imagine you walk into your kitchen and find that the cookie jar, usually placed on the counter, is empty. You notice a trail of crumbs leading from the counter to your child’s bedroom down the hallway. Additionally, you see chocolate smudges on your child’s face when you ask if they had cookies.
In this scenario, you don’t have direct evidence that your child took the cookies—there’s no video footage, no one directly saw them do it, and they haven’t confessed. However, you have circumstantial evidence:
1. **Empty cookie jar**: The jar was full earlier, and now it’s empty.
2. **Trail of crumbs**: The crumbs lead directly to your child’s room.
3. **Chocolate smudges**: Your child’s face has evidence (smudges) that they likely ate cookies.
While these pieces of evidence don’t definitively prove that your child took the cookies, they create a strong suggestion that they did. This is the essence of circumstantial evidence: it relies on inference rather than direct proof.
Here, the evidence is circumstantial evidence of xyz but it can be used to prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt.
Darn I forgot to list the Roasts! Hilarious
I don’t think I followed directions. You were looking for emotional provoking material.
The one that had the biggest emotional impact on me was the one about tears. When you talked about experiencing your dad’s tears of pride for you. It made me tear up. I could clearly envision your dad sat opposite of you the look of emotional exhaustion weighing down his face. His eyes filled with so much more than pride. They were holding back years of remorse and regret. All the time that had been lost. He was so proud of you all the while knowing he had little to do with your success. The way you explained feeling your dad’s love for the first time. I’m tearing up just thinking about it.
Another article that major screwed with me is The narcissist prays for you. I was both disgusted and turned on at the same time. I was angry that I felt pulled in by that work of total blasphemy. How very dare you. I was so confused. It made me feel gross for even listening to it yet I did, several times.
I get angry when you talk about nasty things you did to your ex girlfriends. I don’t remember the exact videos. I usually express my dislike by commenting yuck, gross or something to that effect. I just roll my eyes and move along but In the moment I want to stab you in the earlobe.
Your last sentence amused me.
I’ve been listening for a long time. I would say 7 or 8 years. A very long time to listen to a YouTuber I would say. I just can’t stay away. 😇
Own: How the narcissist sees you
This was the turning point for me. At the time I was seeing a therapist that was only confusing me more. I just needed someone to tell me the truth. Nothing like hearing it from the horses mouth. The video where you explain that we are a toaster or a TV snapped me out of it. I finally got it! I was actually relieved. It wasn’t about me. I could have been anyone. That made me feel less worthless. There wasn’t anything I could have been or done. Therapists are doing us no favors bubble wrapping our feelings. Rip the damn bandaid off. I went for round 2 even after but that’s for a different day. The important thing is the light bulb went on and I couldn’t unsee what he was anymore.
Sex and the Narcissist
This is my favorite book. This book is about so much more than sex. It is where I learned the most about myself. I learned I have a co dependent part to my personality. It explained so much about my own behavior, not just his. I had too many ah ha moments during the reading of this book to count. I need to read it again.
Prey
This is my favorite spicy story although Restraining an appliance is moving up in the ranks.
These are just to name a few. Knowledge is power but as you say, knowing and feeling are different.
Thank you for sharing your views GP. Yes, the video about being seen as a toaster is often referenced as a wake up moment for people. I agree with you about the necessity of ripping the band aid off. The stark reality of what it is to be ensnared with a narcissist is something you need to know and understand.
These comments are so helpful in themselves and for me to read articles more here. Especially re appliances ..I can see if I let myself be used by my mother, she’d take every little drop and move on without a thought (although then crying victim / sad tears at my demise to get even more fuel). I feel sad for her and for me. And grateful for the truth. HG and this blog reminds me of this quote:
“The truth will set you free. But first it will piss you off”.
Let me see you stripped down to the bone…
Sad – Forever Wrong Upon the Throne
Angry – Promiscuous Boy
Aha – All empath and narcissist descriptor articles
Laugh – The Empath’s Riposte Grenades, #1
Happy – The Narcissists Wheel of Misery, it offers solutions and therefore hope.
There are close runner ups to each but these are the first ones that came to mind for each.
Care to expand on why, AV?
Sad – Forever Wrong Upon the Throne
I didn’t understand this one for a long time but every time I read it the despair of the narcissist overwhelmed me. That they had no choice, which to me seemed unfair, and they were left being a lonely narcissist, which to me at that time was so sad. The hopelessness of it. And having it personalized to you, in that dark place, the angst of missing her, it broke my heart.
Angry – Promiscuous Boy
My ex cheated a lot. A lot. This article brought back to me the feelings involved around that. It made me want to smack your, and also him, really hard. After I read it a few times, I no longer did, I didn’t need the reminder of those feelings and the ensuing roller coaster those feelings would bring.
Aha – All empath and narcissist descriptor articles
These were so eye opening as to what the dynamics were of what is been living with, as it turned out, my entire life. So eye opening.
Laugh – The Empath’s Riposte Grenades, #1
I still think of this several times a week and often want to do it to my mother. Just happened yesterday, the thought crossed my mind. And every single time, it still makes me laugh in my own head. It’s a good relief from her.
Happy – The Narcissists Wheel of Misery, it offers solutions and therefore hope.
This one I already explained due to it potentially not making sense. I had the hardest time with this one because none of the articles made me happy right off the bat. So I had to come at it from a different angle, one that offers hope if I make better decisions.
AV,
I like to laugh in my head too! Sometimes I inconspicuously give them the finger too! That always makes me giggle!
Leigh, I’d never thought of that idea! Thank you!
Hi AV,
I have a lot of hair. So I like to scratch my head under my hair using my middle finger! It cracks me up just thinking about it! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Do you have head lice?!
HA! No, narcissistic fleas, lol!
Hahaha! HG and Leigh! Those comments cracked me up!!
Dear HG and Leigh,
Your comments made me laugh! 😄😄xx
“Do you have head lice?!”
Such comment perplex me…like ..is he playing or just doesn’t see?..
It’s a joke.
Mr. Tudor,
Before I respond to this, I have a question. The one that made me sad is The Three that Got Away. In order to say why it made me sad, I have to explain the situation with Karen. Am I allowed to do that?
You may do so, although I suggest you add a spoiler warning at the start of your post. Thank you for the courtesy of seeking permission to explain.
Hello HG:
I am thrilled you are doing the Catfish Mom. I don’t buy Munchausen Disease by Proxy. I think she is a narcissist. I don’t believe she is capable of loving her daughter.
@ contagious
Me too, I was hoping for it! Was delivered before I got the chance to ask it, haha!
Mr Tudor, Cecilia from the Tinder Swindler, (who was on your EDC), also has a new series on Netflix about Love Frauds. Good on her, for turning the situation around. Maybe this is of interest as a topic to discuss?
Her traits of martyr and saviour working overdrive!
Yes, I saw her name pop up when I was looking on Netflix recently.