Seven Lies For Seven Others
The lies we tell with reference to other people.
- She is just a friend
Oh no she is not. Whilst it is entirely the case that we will have friends, both in the inner and outer circles who are of the opposite sex, you should be aware that whilst that may be their current status, in terms of their ability to provide us with fuel, they once had a different status. The key word here is “just”. We say this to emphasise that this person is a friend and nothing more so don’t think you can pin any blame on us. The reality is that this person was once an intimate partner and has been demoted to a friend but is very much still in play. We keep them hanging on in the hope that they believe they will be reinstated and thus they keep providing us with fuel. Secondly, she will be used to triangulate with you both now as friend v you as intimate partner and later as reinstated intimate partner v you as discarded intimate partner. She will be keen to usurp you because she wants us again. She wants the golden period again. She is the competition and we encourage it.
- She’s just a friend, again.
Look who is back? Actually she is not, she is someone else but she fits in the mould of being described as “just a friend” to you in order to deflect those accusing looks you are giving us. Once again this person will be an inner or outer circle friends, maybe “just” an acquaintance but we have plans for her. This is your replacement who we are busy seducing, as we once did with you. This is the person who will be providing us with fresh and invigorating fuel after we have cast you down from your pedestal. It is coming, believe me. This is the competition. Again.
- I am so proud of my son/daughter
I am a high achiever and I expect my children to follow in my foot-steps, after all, they are just a part of me, extensions of me and I expect them to do as I desire, rather than find their own way in life. I will push them to succeed at school, in sports, with music and so forth because their achievements are actually my achievements. My son graduated with honours; he gets his brains from me. My daughter won the county athletic championships; I was always an excellent runner. Those achievements are down to me and I will take all of the credit for them , pulling the spotlight away from them and onto me where it belongs. I am not proud of them at all. I am proud of myself.
- She abused me
Your predecessor was a horrible person. I did everything that I could for her. Everything. I gave my all for our relationship and how was I repaid? Lies, control and abuse. She stopped me seeing my friends, stole money from me, told lies to my boss so I lost my job, hit me and made my life an absolute misery. I escaped her and she came after me because she cannot ever let me go. She will always want to cause me problems. She seems to thrive on it. There is clearly something very wrong with her since she behaves in this way. If you ever meet her, watch out, she will tell you all manner of lies about me. Don’t believe anything she says, she is evil, pure evil.
Did I mean my ex? I was talking to myself again there.
- He is a close and personal friend
Yes that famous actor over there. Do you see him? Yes, that’s him. He is a close and personal friend of mine. I have known him for years. He thinks I am great. We have such a great time together. Of course he is often busy so we do not see as much of one another as we would both like, but when we do, boy do we have a fantastic time. I could tell you a few stories about him, but of course I won’t, I am the model of discretion you see. We met at a film premiere some years ago, I forgot which one precisely, but we hit it off straight away. I always do with people, I am just a people person really, great at connecting with people. I know quite a few famous people to be honest but I do not like to talk about it too much. Will I go and say hello? Of course, he will be probably come over to talk to me in a minute after he has spoken to his fans. He likes to get his obligations out of the way before talking to his real friends. Let me tell you about some other famous people I am friends with whilst we are waiting.
- My family are trouble
It is a terrible fact but my family are trouble. I wish it was not the case. I wish they were more like yours. You seem to have such a good relationship with your parents and your brother. I don’t have that with mine. It is all down to jealousy you see. Terrible isn’t it? Do feel free to feel sorry for me. Good, thank you. Yes, I have always been the achiever of the family and for some reason, rather than support me and praise me for my endeavours I get nothing but insults, cold shoulders and nastiness. No matter how hard I try, no matter what I do, it is always the same. I get no recognition for the sacrifices I make. I get no understanding or compassion because they are all self-obsessed, too busy screaming “Look at me” to care about me. I haven’t had it easy you know? I may appear successful and brilliant but it has been a tough slog to the top and they have not helped one bit. I hate them. I know I shouldn’t say that about them but you would say the same if you had been treated the way I had. I am afraid you will have to meet them at some point, they will seem all sweetness and light at first, but don’t be fooled. They are evil underneath.
- He is a liar
Him? Oh we were once really good friends but not anymore, not after what he did to me. I lent him some money, quite a lot actually. He had hit a difficult time with his job and this meant that his bills were not being paid, at least that is what he told me. I later found out he had gambling debts and rather than use the money I lent him to clear those debts. I would not have minded to be honest, he went and gambled it away and made the debt larger. He came back with some sob story about needing the money for a medical bill and me being the caring fool I am was taken in. What did he really want it for? Oh you guessed it, more gambling. I am such an idiot but I cannot help but try and help people out. I had to say no to him after that and do you know what his response was? Rather than understand and be thankful for all the help that I have given him, he starts telling people that I am the one who owes him money. Can you believe it? That’s why I have nothing to do with him. He lies all the time so watch out as he is bound to try and turn you against me. Thank goodness I got to you first.
19 thoughts on “Seven Lies For Seven Others”
Hey HG, while I think most all of us can understand the need for the “big” lies because they provide narcs with grandiosity and the accompanying fuel, can you explain the inherent use of the little bullshit lies that we hear and sit wondering, “why on Earth is he/she even bothering to lie about that?” An example, I send a FB message, and it clearly says he saw it at such and such time. Further, he sent a thumbs up in response. Then 16 hours later he sends me a message saying, “I just saw your message.” When I simply respond, “you sent a thumbs up at 5:30 this morning” and then drop it, he says the thumbs up (which was enlarged meaning he physically had to hold his finger on it to increase the size), “was just his phone glitching.” Seriously, what is the purpose of such an idiotic lie? To me, it doesn’t seem to serve any purpose at all. To him, if I pressed the issue, he would go to his death defending his absurd statement. I just want to know why he feels the need to lie about such trivial things. Thank you for your insight!
Seven Brides for Seven Brothers! Got it!!
And they are all close personal friends hehehe
I know HG. I too have the gift of sight.
Nice reference there. You know your musicals! What an endearing trait.
Only one to notice so far K !
All so true !! No 3 is the worst though. The one person you should be able to count on throughout your life. The ultimate betrayal !
Really good post though HG and your humour is very welcome 🙂
Thanks Alexis and to top it all it is almost beer o’clock.
Hahha here’s to the weekend. Cheers HG
I’ve heard many people repeatedly say it’s must be beer o’clock somewhere in the world; whenever they crack open a cold one anytime of day. It is like that in England? We were actually told here that you guys drink warm beer? Is that true?
Not at all. We like our lager cold and our hearts colder.
Oh. England’s out for me then…
You forgot “I gave my life for my children”, which is Narcissist code for “I abused my children & am the reason they are in therapy/have alcohol/substance abuse problems/have not been home for Christmas in 20 years”.
No. 3 ,5 and 6 are the only 3 statements I heard from my exes being number 5 the common one among all. CEOs, gurus, designers … Whatever top person there was on their proffesional line was known … I believed… Just discovering could be lies 😂😂😂
No 7 did not understand 😩😖
I’m meeting up with a friend.
HOW MANY TIMES DID I HEAR THAT?!?
And of course, because he believed in momogamy and was soooo obviously in love with me, it never even occured to me to question him or be jealous.
I was going to be the “cool girl” who didn’t drive her boyfriend away by being a jealous shrew who couldn’t handle him having female friends (or should I say, “friends”).
Wow, was I made for a narc or what!
My ex husband and N2 had many female friends which I fortunately did not questiok because they were still their friends when being alone and are still their female friends…. I dont know if their new partners question them 😂😂
It’s amazing to me how the lies roll off the tongue so easily for you. Looking back now I can’t believe a word that came out of his mouth. I can’t decipher between little bits of truth and bold faced lies. So, I just chalk it all up as lies. I can’t stand liars and I hate being deceived.
One might suggest that chalking them all up as lies would serve you best Angered.