The Twenty Lesser Deflections

The lesser of our kind is a creature of instinctive reactions and knee-jerk responses. In common with all our kind, he or she must always avoid blame and swerve accountability. Denial is often used by the Lesser Narcissist to achieve this with a blunt rejection of the comment that you have levelled against him or her and if you persist you will invariably find yourself on the receiving end of some heated fury in order to beat you down from asking your questions and apportioning blame. The Lesser Narcissist will offer denial with little or no supporting evidence. It is not a topic for discussion any longer. The lesser will also engage in the art of deflection. He or she does not think carefully being launching these phrases and comments in a bid to deflect the nature of your questions and accusations but rather they are an immediate response. Indeed, they will often appear to be raised out of context, appear to be non sequiturs and even almost nonsensical. They are not to the lesser. In his world these are instinctive responses which he or she has to come out with in order to deflect your questioning of them. Your questioning creates unease and discomfort and the lesser will issue these phrases from a stockpile he or she keeps. They lack the higher function to think of a high-calibre response which brings about deflection but instead utilise these phrases below in a “one size fits all” approach. They will be hurled back at you, often with venom attached, a standard response to what you are saying to the Lesser Narcissist. Expect to hear them may times in the course of your dance with the lesser. He is not capable enough of conjuring up new ones and relies on these “old faithfuls” to deflect the force of what you are trying to achieve. The deflection at this level works usually by causing disbelief and confusion on your part. You like everything to make sense. You like things to follow an order and be logical and therefore these stock responses will make you stop in your tracks as you try and figure out either what is actually meant by them or if you understand the thrust of the comment how on earth they are applicable to what the discussion is about. This is the beauty of these deflecting comments for the Lesser Narcissist. He cannot think up clever or articulate responses but he does not need to because there are just as effective in halting you in your tracks. They may not always result in your behaviour being questioned (as is more the hall mark of the deflecting comments of the Mid-Ranger of the Greater Narcissist) which then takes the conversation or discussion in a different direction. These comments however fulfil the aim of stopping the discussion going in the direction it was and indeed cause it to veer off at an improbable tangent into the realms of confusion and bewilderment. That does not matter to the lesser, as long as the attack, the criticism and/or the questioning stops goes elsewhere and his accountability remains unaffected. So long as your response provides him or her with  fuel, the comment need not be magnificent or well-constructed. Here are twenty stock deflecting comments used by Lesser Narcissists.


  1. You’re nothing special yourself you know.
  2. Why do you have to use dictionary words with me?
  3. I’m not stupid you know. Why do you have to make me out to be stupid?
  4. I don’t care what other people do, they are idiots for thinking that way.
  5. You’ve been reading too many books.
  6. You think you are so clever don’t you?
  7. Why isn’t my dinner ready?
  8. Been listening to her again have we? I can always tell when you  two have been talking.
  9. Can a man not get some peace in his own home?
  10. You sound like your mother.
  11. I’m going out.
  12. Why aren’t you ready?
  13. You should know your place.
  14. You talk too much.
  15. You never listen to me properly.
  16. Never mind me, what have you been up to eh?
  17. I know what you’ve done.
  18. You can’t judge me.
  19. Fancy words don’t make you right you know?
  20. Since when did this house become a court room?

10 thoughts on “The Twenty Lesser Deflections

  1. Asp Emp says:

    # 20. Since when did this house become a court room?

    That gave me a giggle. Similar has been said by various narcissists of my past. Because I have an inquiring mind and the in-built empath ‘grenades’ landed me in many a lather over the years. LOL.

    There will be empaths around that may have, or may not have ‘recognised’ their empath ‘grenades’ within their neurological processes, inadvertently “challenging” the narcissist, leading to assertion of control. Oh, many times, I did. I am still not guilty. LOL.

  2. Heather says:

    Neanderthals!!! Uga Buga!! Killed ME with all that nonsense! Now I feel stupid!! Thank you for another kick in the pants! It’s like removing layers of grave clothes! I can feel my own power coming back! HG😎 You are an Angel in disguise! Thank you!

    1. HG Tudor says:

      Uga buga, you make me laugh.

  3. apocalipznow says:

    Whoa. Did you steal my diary? Spot on, in my case.

    #1 “You really think you’re Miss America, but you’re not.” ; “I would tell you what’s wrong with you, but I’m not that cruel.”

    #2 Dude, I’m sorry if my “eleven dollar words” frighten and confuse you. He was/is just a basic dumbfuck. I once asked him if his mom was a diabetic. He said , “no, she worked nights”….duhhh lolll

    #13 ” You will do as your told.” and “Quiet!” were 2 of his favorite sayings.

    On the one hand, it’s good to know he was a lesser narcissist. Geez, what a loser. Can’t even get that right. ; )

    1. bethany7337 says:

      LOL this has me laughing out loud!

  4. Cara says:

    Oh my youngest sister loves to tell me that fancy words don’t make me right, & not to use “dictionary” words with her. She REALLY hates when I correct her, like if she says “fustrated” instead of FRUSTRATED (we were both born & educated in the US, an English-speaking country, all I want is for her to speak English). She says when I do those things (use “dictionary” words, use fancy words as though that alone makes me right, correct her) what I’m REALLY doing is calling attention to my command of the English language & attempting to make her feel less than for not having the same command of the English language.

    1. nikitalondon says:

      Yep. Correcting language cam be used to feel superior. 😖

      1. Cara says:

        I have an M. A. in British Lit…I taught English at one time. I don’t MEAN to do anything to make my sister think I’m trying to feel superior to her, it’s just a force of habit.

        She was a finance major in college & I’m not good with money (or anything that involves numbers). She puts me down too. We go out with a group of people, we eat, the check comes & rather than look at it & figure out what I owe, I say “Ok, how much is my share”, and she’ll throw the check at me and say, “What are you, an idiot? Figure it out!”

        1. nikitalondon says:

          Seems to be lots of competition in between you two? … I feel normal for the environment you both grew up in. 🌷

  5. nikitalondon says:

    Excellent! Cant wait for the other two, so that I can get the big picture and classify my past. ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️. I enjoy the learning and further understanding.

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