Goodbye or Au Revoir?

Image result for man walking away

 

“Dear Victim,

 

Well, wasn’t that the roller coaster ride? Don’t look so miserable at least you are getting a letter. The last four never got anything at this stage, I just disappeared and the first they knew that I was no longer interested in them was when they saw me parading my new acquisition. Still, they brought it on themselves or at least that is what I keep telling myself because after all, nothing is my fault is it? So, here is your letter. Yes, this is a Dear John letter, a missive designed to tell you that our entanglement is now at an end (for now – more on that later) and that I am now romantically involved with somebody else. Just as an aside, did you know that they originated from letters sent to soldiers by their unfaithful wives. Yes, brave Johnny was out there fighting the good fight whilst his Mrs was shacked up with Johnny-Come-Lately and she decided that rather than wait for Johnny to come home from the front she would choose Johnny Come Lately who was stationed in her home town. Seems our kind did not even suspend operations because of World War Two. Anyway, I digress. Yes, this letter is to tell you that you and I are no more. The simple reason is you are no use to me anymore. I know it seems damned unfair but my needs are all that matter you see. You gave it a good shot; I will give you that I suppose. You lasted longer than the one before, whatever her name was. Something to be proud of isn’t it, there haven’t been many who have held on to me as long as you have. I know in between the tears and the confusion when you read this letter you will be wondering why on earth have I done this after everything that you have done for me. You see, it is exactly that kind of selfish thinking that put a hex on you and me. If you had spent more time thinking about me and my needs, then we wouldn’t be in this position. Well, actually, we probably would because so far no matter what anybody has managed to do, I have always found them to be lacking eventually and had my head turned by somebody else. It always seems to happen and it cannot be my fault can it? I don’t do anything wrong. I mean I chased you, made you feel special and did all the tickling, hair-twirling and sweet nothings, you got a good time, come on you have to admit it. Oh I know things went sour afterwards but I have already written to you about that, do you have to go on about it? There you go again. Me, me, me. Never a thought for how I might feel. Have you any idea what it is like needing to rely on someone else to validate your existence? Oh you do. Well, that makes it worse actually, if you do know, why didn’t you do something about it? Anyway, I don’t have time to go into all that now. I daresay you are wondering why I have chosen someone now rather than try and work things out with you or at the very least agree to an amicable split before looking for a new victim. Well, it is a fair question I suppose. I have had the new person lined up for a while. You just weren’t doing it for me anymore and I had to make sure my needs were met so whilst you waited for me to come home, dinner in the oven, or dealt with the children again on your own as I was away on a “business trip” I was busy choosing her and seducing her. She is a right cracker, going to give me lots of emotional attention, better than you ever did. Oh don’t start with the tears, no actually carry on, that makes me feel better when you cry. I could list all the things that she is and which you are not, but I cannot be bothered to do it now, I am too excited about spending time with my new toy, er I mean partner. Don’t worry though, I will triangulate you with her at some point so you can find out all about why I chose her and we may as well have a little competition where I pit you and her against one another and I sit back and choose a winner. That’s what you get to do when you are as brilliant as me, so we can save the analysis about her for another time.

I’ve left you with a load of debt. Nothing to do with me as everything is in your name, but I suppose it will give you something to concentrate on alongside wondering what has just happened. I am going to take a few household items too, they are mine after all and I need to make sure my new home has everything. I imagine you will muddle through somehow, not that I care of course, but I might pretend to care if you give me the reaction I am after. I daresay you think I am cold-hearted and callous bastard but you have to understand this is your fault and not mine. If you had just tried harder to please me and keep me happy then I would not have had to look elsewhere. You made me have this affair because you are selfish and do not think about me. It is no point digging out that ridiculous list you have kept of everything that you have supposedly done for me, I know for a fact it is made up, but then you are something of a fantasist after all, at least that is what I have been telling all our friends and families, plus the neighbours, oh and your boss and the chap at the corner shop. Well, I am not having you spreading lies about me by saying I have gone off with some young bit of stuff leaving you in a half-empty house, with no income, a load of debt and the kids to look after. That would make me look bad and I have a reputation to maintain. Don’t even think about telling tales. Nobody will believe you. I have made sure of that and I will see the kids when I can be bothered, but when I do decide to bother my backside you had better not start playing silly buggers or I will have you in court and the judge and everyone else will know about your drink and drug problems. It is no good pretending you don’t have them, I know you do, or at least, I will make it seem like you do.

Well, I think that is everything. I have left a few bits and bobs in case I want to come back and torment you by haggling over a toaster and that collection of coloured vinyl records. Don’t think about calling me or hassling me, people already think you are a nut job. So, this is it. As I mentioned, at least I am telling you it is over, so you know. See, I am considerate after all. I would say good bye, but is more like au revoir, but when I say so.

Thanks for nothing

N. Arc x”

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35 thoughts on “Goodbye or Au Revoir?”

  1. You are certainly on a roll today!

    These Dear Victim letters are among my favourites. Your brilliant sense of humour shines through in these posts and they bring a smile to my face!

    HG, you know I have a lot of work to do which is increasingly hard when I keep being distracted by your very lovely and very tempting words.

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  2. If mine had a brain, I imagine he’d send this. All I get, unfortunately, are silent calls where the other person is chewing and slurping ….

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  3. You can send me the narc application of you like HG, I was attracted to that initial smoking chemistry but I had a mission “my Father would be the king of your kind, movie star looks, high ranking government official, IQ off the charts”. So I always knew what was coming with your kind and took that ride 60-90 days and then I disgaurded them, it’s a damn good ride as long as you know when to cut and run… Never without leaving YOUR kind a giant psychological Trojan Horsey to deal with. No dear anybody letters, just a message to you all, an empath with a kill switch is going to take that mask off and show you WHAT you really are.
    I tire of whole dance now, but is was a grand ball while it lasted. I lost a glass slipper and didn’t want the prince who came round looking for the victim it fit.
    As always, the work you do here is greatly appreciated, you are doing a great service to those who have been deeply harmed and need to know what happened so they can get free and never be harmed by your kind again.
    Excelant articles of late HG, thank you.

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    1. Hello Anteah,
      Battles and wars. One must know when to retreat. It helps to know these antisocial’s have NO conscience or empathy for anyone but number one. All the narcissistic injury in the world won’t change them. Perhaps if there are enough of MY kind out there they will go live in a box with porn and the real love of their lives THEIR HAND…. And the world will be a little safer for the lovely and kind hearted people they adore destroying.

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  4. No letter, just words on the phone. At least he doesn’t say he loves me anymore, but I told him not to say it. No he says to move on and see other people and give them a chance. But then he will say…………ready? Drum Roll Please………………”but, I don’t know, in the back of my mind I end up with you.”
    Sure dirtbag, I will be right here.

    Oh, he told me I will have bad karma because I told him I wouldn’t give a damn if he died.

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  5. Only recently begun to find humour whist reading about narcissism.
    I have to say I’ve giggled throughout reading this!
    Brilliant!!

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  6. In the beginning, he left clothes here and I sent them back to him. Nice clothes too. I should have burned them with the little notes I had. His crazy notes.
    What do I do with the little gold unicorn pin he gave me. It is a nice piece of jewelry. I want to take a hammer to it.

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  7. I love how there is a question mark at the end of the title…it’s as if you aren’t sure…but you know we will never leave your mind. That’s the gift and curse of this relationship bc you will never leave ours.

    With my luck N2 would have had me take dictation on my own Dear Jaded letter. His spelling was atrocious. His vocab was okay enough but if he tried to put it in writing it would have presented as a 5 year old trying to write “big people words”. I would have been tempted to take out an ad in a publication and say, hey world, I just received this letter from a 41 year old. My pride wouldn’t have taken a hit, but I would have felt guilty afterward bc his would have.

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  8. Love it, HG! I’m also starting to feel laughter and power with each blog I read. Just purchased Fuel. I know I should read them in order but I’m “fueled” (bad pun) by Fuel😘

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  9. Dear John,

    I don’t think you’re a cold-hearted and callous bastard, I know it.

    Goodbye

    P.s Don’t bother coming back for your bit & Bobs I’ve moved .

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  10. Can this also serve as a tip off, like initiating a silent treatment, where you would love nothing more than for us to chase you with a wave of emotion, begging you not to leave and how much we really love you? Rather than letters, I have gotten the official text message stating it’s done. Or to leave him alone. At least 4-5 times over the last 3 years. Then he’s always resurfaced. That is why I’m wondering if it’s an attention cry? Although I do realize in many cases, new fuel is lined up at this point.

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  11. Six months after mom dies (and the attention has died down) Tubby will resurface. By that point I hope to have moved on.

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